Welcome to the Annual Pussy Snorkeling Championship! This year sponsored by Damar's Special Reserve Kanar, drink it before he does!
Coming to you from Casperia Prime, boy do we have a special line up this year folks!
Starting off we have last years winner and favourite to win; the Remover of Hasperat, the destroyer of Bajoran pussy everywhere, he's not just any Cardassian, he's Gul Dukat! Will he go the distance and challenge the record laid down by James T Kirk? Who knows, but if anyone can come close it's him!
Next up we have a newcomer who you may be forgiven as being some random Pakled that has wandered in confused into the studio but don't let looks fool you! Grebnedlog battle record is already nearly as long as Gowron's! Speaking of which Gowron will not be attending this year due to being disqualified by refusing to have his "d'k tahg" cleaned before taking part, stirring quite a lot of controversy!
Here we have someone you are all well acquainted with by now, he's the USS Enterprise's resident Chad and last year's runner up! Commander William T Riker! Will he take the throne from Dukat? If anyone can he's the one to beat!
Last up we have the wandering rogue, the outrageous Captain Thadium Okona! Considered quite a ladies man in certain circles but will that do him any good here when he's up against professionals? While certainly no favourite to win he may yet surprise us! Certainly one to keep an eye on!
Now we have been introduced to our contenders it's time to let them get settled in. What techniques will they use? How far will they endure? We will find out after some messages from Quark!