>>21901
Look into panentheism/cosmotheism. It's really what my entire worldview is centered around. I will try to give you my interpretation here in a greentext.
>everything all together as one all encompassing whole (including all possible universes etc.) is God
>God is a "gestalt" (a whole which is more than just the sum of its parts)
>God may or may not be conscious, basically there is no way for us to possibly comprehend whatever this unified one (or monad) really is or the nature of it and how it experiences itself
>you and everything around you are therefore part of this monad/God
>people/animals (rational actors basically, things that can make choices and interact with their environment) are also part of God and I think of them like cells in your body
>some cells are good and help the body function (like liver cells)
>some cells are cancerous and even though they are part of the body, do great damage to the body as a whole
>meaning of life is pretty simple, you are born, you build yourself, you put something into the world (work/family/whatever), you share your knowledge with those younger than you, then you die to make room for more people, it really is that simple
>good people also sometimes must fight the cancer killing the world, which is almost always other people
>who is good and who is bad is up to you, that is part of the "building yourself" component of the meaning of life
>suicide is only justified if you are rationally aware you are doing harm to the world around you
There's more to it, but that is the basic idea. Evolution and genetics play a huge role in it for me, but it makes the most sense IMO. I still want to kill myself, but I know it isn't justifiable and would only hurt the people who do care about me. It would make me more cancerous and therefore is unaccepPost too long. Click here to view the full text.