/doomer/ - Doomers Club

>>>/bloomer/

>>22083

I would like to believe that most "bloomers" quit imageboards because they realized how much it can drag you down. What is the reality, I don't know. Alright, I might give this a bit of a time and elaborate with my shit views:

>this meme is unironically the only thing keeping me alive

How's so?

>if I'm not a bloomer by the time I'm 27

Why 27? Why it is such an important age for you?

>What are the actual odds that I will eventually become a bloomer?

Depends what person are you. If you can be influenced by anything then I guess you have chance every day. The better question to ask is that if you can believe in blooming, were you really a doomer?

>Or is it all just a meme, and I should just give up on life?

If you think the life can be improved by your own activities to a degree that you can see always the positive side - first and foremost that you even believe there is some bright side to begin with - then I guess keep on trying.

>Give me some white pills bros.

There are no white pills, only pills that are slightly more digestible if you can learn how to turn your brain off.

I would say the lack of de, the confucianist and daoist virtue, explained as being morally and practically in the correct place in the universe. Doomers are sad, because they are not in the right place in their lives. They are not in harmony with themselves and the world around them, so they compensate with bitter resignation.

Bloomers on the other hand know exactly the same facts as doomers. The Earth is dying and we are dying with it. Human civilization is bitter and evil. Death is inevitable. There are no values in this world which are universal, there is no heavenly punishment for evil and reward for good.

Still it doesn't matter to them, because they-us, take consolation in doing meaningful good deeds to people around us and showing a good example of behavior that everyone can follow and learn from, thus making people act better. If we give out kindness, others will be healed and will act better. If we only have bitterness, we give out bitterness and poison the minds of others who also in return poison ours. That is why it is the duty of a noble man to show a good example and why it is practical to be moral.

>>22114

Problem is that objectively both bloomer and doomer standpoints/approaches in this matter as you described them are valid. Doomers or Bloomers are not wrong, we are both right, we just approach the problem in different ways. Even though I'm not big fan of asian philosophies I like this concept of being in harmony/in conflict with the "world" or your surroundings. Only this is something I would disagree with:

>That is why it is the duty of a noble man to show a good example and why it is practical to be moral.

Being moralspook is highly impractical for your own self and that's why it's a noble thing. You are not noble because you are trying to be moral which should be practical, you are noble because you know being moral is not practical but you decide to be moral anyway because you believe it's right thing to do. I can appreciate it, however, I think that being selfish is not such a bad thing as it may sound - thus being practical and not necessarily moral. In a selfish world, if you desire to give a life a chance, you have to take something from the poisoned cake otherwise you are left with nothing - you have to have some solid twisty ground you can stand on rather than taking other's ground and as your base. That means basically if I want to keep on living and have somewhat bearable life (which can be used as ground for later "good deeds" focused outside to my surroundings), I have to do something for myself first. In a world, where you are in deep conflict as individual with everything else, it's mission impossible. Your only chance is then searching for some false identity, like other even daypeople do - idpol, class struggle, race/gender struggle, whatever else. The core issue remains though - if you strip down everything from yourself, you are still in conflict with reality. Bloomers like to ignore this and improve themselves for the sake of higher personal/non-personal good, however I don't understand through what type of mind altering process you have to go in order to become from a doomer at least semi-decent bloomer. If I can't be selfish now and say fuck everything, I will just be who I want to be, which funnily enough creates space for me in selfish world; if i won't find energy in myself to fight for myself and my place in this world, then I'm not going to move anywhere, which is very valid standpoint and approach to life in current age. I sort of envy our youth their carelessness I used to have, but not in a way "nothing matters fuck everything I don't care" but in a way "I don't care let's do some stupid bullshit lmao". That's also a reason why I don't like seeing here fucking 17 year olds because they can still enjoy the benefits of not giving any shits and just being silly with the life.

tl;dr in order to escape doomerism, you have to accept the world, become one with it, allowing the virus of reality to enter your mind and body. there is nothing as being healthy, you can only choose the illnesses and I don't like the choice of lesser evil.

tl;dr pt.2 only way how I am capable of improving my life is through purely selfish acts against society itself, which is divided into small camps of selfish individuals gathered in their own groups which none of them are viable places for me unless I forcefully join some struggle for the sake of giving meaning to my own life in this selfish manner

>>22122

Oh indeed the standpoints are valid, bloomer and doomer are yin and yang (again please forgive my Asiatics), a certain spectrum of approach one can place himself on. It is not a logical gate of being right, as both indeed are correct and both are a part of each other.

Now the concept of harmony is the the thing where I try to justify being moral as being practical. You see, in general your harmony is your mental state of inner peace. The farther you stay from it, the less happy you are. Harmony as such is a vital part of one's emotional health and well being, and as such needs to be protected just as you would protect your body from harm. In the same way you protect your harmony from unnecessary stress, bitterness, paralyzing sadness, unchained hate- all of that which turns you into a sad, bitter person. One of the ways of protecting it, is to have people around you act in a good way, not trying to fuck you over all the time- and so coming to my earlier argument, by showing them a good example to follow and by acting politely in order to receive the same politeness in return (obviously whenever possible, I'm no hippie). The point is, that I maneuver in a way to avoid being contaminated by bitterness and I do it both by acting well and for my own sake. That is why I think acting morally is practical. Looking at it in a larger context, most of the world's problems and the very source of doomerism comes from humanity's inability to cooperate, act decently and solve problems. We live in a time of ultra individualism- the state of our planet shows us that it simply does not work and we need to look for alternatives to do things better. I'm not in conflict with reality like you are- I'm a part of it and the connections that I forge have an influence on others, but also those connections and people around me shape me as a person, it's unavoidable. That is why if one wants to develop himself, one also has to keep track of others and be mindful of how others shape us. People are unavoidable, so is their influence on us. Even Pentti Linkola and Ted Kacznski were shaped by people. After all we only exist within a society which teaches us and makes us into what we are. Therefore western individualism is inherently flawed as it pretends that there is nobody around you. Look how many people believe this crap and are unhappy.

In regards to causes… Well, I believe that behind every human activity, in the end there is always a human, usually wanting you to do stuff. If I am to judge a cause, I do so by looking at the people who follow it. Now I've done my fair share of activism and met many people with many contradictory viewpoints- religious, non religious, left, right, everything in between… What I found out is that decency goes above creed, but unfortunately so does being an asshole. Causes are abstract, people aren't. It is much easier to achieve a cause by organizing people and again, showing them a good example, rather than preaching a cause and trying to find people who will follow.

tl;dr: you indeed have to accept the world, but also the fact that you are not a pebble on a pile of other pebbles, but a piece of a two way network, both shaping it and being shaped by it whether you want it or not.

tl;dr 2: based on the above, society is not an abstract mass, but indeed a network of interconnected relationships. Being selfish is not bad in certain contexts, but based on the above widened definition of self, it involves acting for selfish reasons, but for the sake of others as well. Meaning in fact acting morally.

>>22127

>In the same way you protect your harmony from unnecessary stress, bitterness, paralyzing sadness, unchained hate- all of that which turns you into a sad, bitter person.

I don't think I have this in my nature to be honest, I often call myself sadomasochist because I sort of enjoy putting myself into mentally uncomfortable situations out of pure curiosity. I like to push my mind beyond its limits to see how far our general truths and reality can go and what, if any of it, can be objectively qualified in any way.

>and so coming to my earlier argument, by showing them a good example to follow and by acting politely in order to receive the same politeness in return (obviously whenever possible, I'm no hippie)

I sometimes do this but first I have to feel like doing it. Even I have my brighter moments. However, I do it even though I'm fully aware that people can't be changed unless they want it themselves, so often this positive approach have no impact whatsoever. How many times I tried to help people and they refused to listen because they weren't ready to make the step themselves.

>why I think acting morally is practical. Looking at it in a larger context

I think now I understand now how you meant it.

>most of the world's problems and the very source of doomerism comes from humanity's inability to cooperate

Many, but I don't know if most. I think there are two groups kind of layered over each other when it comes to why doomers are doomed. First are problems coming from the society the others are personal problems on individual level. However, I think it's mostly this combination of two, when you as individual is in conflict with outer world for whatever reasons. I don't know if better cooperation can do anything with it. We are more connected than ever before, people are cooperating but for what causes? If nothing interests you, there is no effort you are willing to join.

>act decently and solve problems.

Yes, well, we are trying but we more talk than act and even if you act, what sort result it has? There is this division between system and people to such a degree that even people who are part of the system act as if they are not directly responsible for the system. System exists in sort of metaphysical faceless state, as idea, it's there but you can't really point your finger on something concrete and say - yes, this is something we can solve. I noticed this both in right and left wing circles, even if they find something they would agree on, it's for some reason not possible to change because the system has mechanisms to stop your efforts immediately and/or turn them against your. I believe a lot people can actually agree that we need some new system which would suit better our needs and answer problems we face, however we disagree how that system might look like.

>We live in a time of ultra individualism- the state of our planet shows us that it simply does not work and we need to look for alternatives to do things better.

Personally I disagree because I think there is no such thing as only individual and only society. We are first and foremost individuals who optimally benefit if they cooperate in some larger social circles. The question is what is the optimal balance between individual concerns and concerns of society for some greater good/more effective results. Compromise might be the right word. My opinion is that there is nothing inherently bad about most extreme forms of individualism - if and only if - people would be a bit less "assholes" only accepting the benefits of individualism while rejecting the responsibilities, which is not the case so we need some social circles to mitigate our selfish interests. I see it more as pure necessity rather than the only natural way of human existence in this age, where we can have luxury of being individualists, exploring our needs and reaching our goals on individual level with cooperation in larger circles.

>>22127

>That is why if one wants to develop himself, one also has to keep track of others and be mindful of how others shape us.

The problem is that I reached age when I'm pretty much shaped to some solid state, where is possible to change the details but the core of my personality is unchangeable. Not because of my own stubborn effort but because of effort I put into developing my personality and reaching conclusions through experiences over like 2 decades, you can tell. Unless something drastically changes in our society when I will be forced to revalue my approaches and views, then I'm afraid I will remain as I am now deep inside. I don't like that things are somewhat normalized now. We have struggles but nothing is truly changing, we are sort of waiting until some crisis hits us and we will be forced to change.

>Therefore western individualism is inherently flawed as it pretends that there is nobody around you. Look how many people believe this crap and are unhappy.

Again, it's not so black or white. I don't reject people and I still can have a bit of love for people, care about their struggles and concerns, however I understand that I must also stand behind myself and that's how I see individualism. I'm even worse than your traditional ancap, I unironically like points Stirner brought to the table which can be also source of your own personal satisfaction. If you take responsibility for yourself, you can reach some satisfaction because there is no one else to blame. However, I still failed at this and I'm stuck somewhere in middle where I like to be individual but still in conflict with "what is outside", because I would love to love the world, I just can't because I see it as it is. It's too wide problem to describe it in few sentences like this.

>It is much easier to achieve a cause

Is it worth the effort to even achieve any cause? I would say that most people nowadays, even I said it in post above yours, so it applies to me as well, see causes worth fighting if you have this selfish benefit from it - feeling better because you are part of something, feeling better because you have something to live for, in other words, not being so noble as it may appear. It's called virtue signalling. And of course it brings enemies too and not many people are willing to go with head against the wall. That might be my only way out, to just plow through the obstacles as I did my whole life, without thinking, without caring, just pushing through my life without any solid and achievable goal.

>you indeed have to accept the world, but also the fact that you are not a pebble on a pile of other pebbles, but a piece of a two way network, both shaping it and being shaped by it whether you want it or not.

You know, I still doubt that this would have any impact whatsoever, if I would switch myself to person who is trying to help others by any means necessary. I was like that, it wasn't helping anything. So where is the problem? Am I just too negative right now or not naive enough, or maybe both?

>Meaning in fact acting morally.

But what is morality and what is moral act? That's something so subjective I can't help myself but calling out a spook on this one. Sometimes acting out of pure moral reasons can do the biggest damage, if not all the time. I love to give people the freedom to think for themselves and solve their personal issues themselves because I feel that If I put my input in the problem, they might act upon my influence and that's not something I want to do even if the result is good. I'm still naive idiot, I still think that people can think for themselves and be responsible individuals even though I've seen many times it's just not truth.

>>22075

why would you even want to become that ?

>>22136

>I sort of enjoy putting myself into mentally uncomfortable situations out of pure curiosity

Well, as a test of sorts that would be fine, but I don't see the reason for doing it permanently. Call it an uneducated guess, but I see that there has to be an underlying reason for you torturing yourself like that.

>people can't be changed

Nah, not really. Again, we are shaped by our environment. You are a part of that environment. It's better to do something, than nothing at all, because even a slightest alteration in the positive is positive for us. Otherwise you're well, a doomer.

>We are more connected than ever before

No we aren't! :D We are connected to market each other, to whore ourselves out, to mercantile and advertise ourselves as a commodity, resource, FTE as we call it in the corporate world… It by no means that we are truly connected, as this enforced individialism and consummerism disconnects us farther than we ever were. That's the true tragedy, we only pretend we're connected. Again, it's not about joining a cause and a struggle, but to establish connections with good people.

>it's there but you can't really point your finger on something concrete

Argh, that's what I'm trying to say! People! People are parts of the system, they have generated it, but it does not exist in a way you and I do. We as human beings are connected on a much more natural level, being this network of relationships I am describing all the time. Confucius teaches: a good person can do good with the worst laws. A bad person can't do good even with the best of laws.

>if - people would be a bit less "assholes"

Ah, you see, that is why self cultivation and again, example are important. This is my recipe on making things better- to act well and by doing so, teach by example so that others may see it and do the same, thus teaching even more people. Revolutions didn't work. Holocausts haven't either. Police states are long gone. Neither did philosopher kings. What else do we have other than decency?

>The problem

You have the ability to change and adapt regardless of your age. In fact change is permanent, this is actually daoist thought. Change happens all the time, you of now is different than the you from the previous sentence. Why shackle your brain when the world is so full of knowledge?

>Again, it's not so black or white.

I agree. I have described a certain aspect, a certain flaw- but culture and way of thinking of billions of people is obviously on a certain spectrum. I'm no Buddhist- I believe in the self and self preservation. I just have a disdain for the so called "locked self", or the concept of the rational egoist which is so deeply embedded in our culture. That I dislike and say it's both untrue and the source of much of the world's misery.

>>22137

>Is it worth the effort to even achieve any cause?

Well, it depends on the cause. And on the people who support it. People come before causes, it is natural. Life has no goal, nor has it any true purpose, we all know that. But what I will also add is that it is much better to live if you find yourself a correct spot where you can live without making an effort. It's something different than attaching yourself to a cause. A carpenter can be as happy as an activist, but switch them and neither will be happy. If you hit a wall, rethink why you got there in the first place, reevaluate, adjust… Or tear it down if that's the right thing to do!

>trying to help others by any means necessary

No, no. That's acting against your nature. Morality and good deeds should be as natural as breathing, one should cultivate himself to reach that state. Otherwise you're just confusing yourself into doing something you're not convinced to do and ultimately, you will start resisting yourself.

>That's something so subjective

Well of course it's subjective. There is no objective morality and in the social context, you move only between people you interact with. Whenever I act, I usually pay close attention to the possible consequences of this act- never the let's call it "urging of the heart". As Talleyrand put it, "Beware of the first impulse- it's usually noble!". Still, the possibility of fucking shit up is not an excuse for moral my mom's cuntardice. This actually comes from strategy- Clausewitz did say that when uncertain, it is usually better to act then not to act as it usually produces better results and it indeed does.

>people can think for themselves

Oh they can, but you have to teach them to do so (again, by example!). Actually let me pull out an example from my workplace. In other teams, the guys are being hounded in a typical corprate fashion- and so they can't solve any problems at all on their own, because they were never allowed to look for their own answers. Their thinking has been systematically shut down. In my crew, the guys are being taught to make decisions, think and show initiative from the very beginning- and so there are few things I have to worry about, as I have a dozen brains around me who support me if my own fails.

>>22164

>Call it an uneducated guess, but I see that there has to be an underlying reason for you torturing yourself like that.

I guess if we would do some psychoanalysis, I'm afraid we would maybe reach conclusion that in fact I'm bored to death and without any vision, so I'm trying to entertain myself. Truth is I enjoy it in some perverted way, I don't know why, I just like doing it even if it brings nothing but discomfort (so far).

>we are shaped by our environment

My point was that people can't be so easily shaped/influenced and it gets worse with age. Of course they are shaped by environment and you are part of it but it's not so simple, they still have their own heads, well at least some of them.

>It by no means that we are truly connected

I can maintain connection with people I never met irl and talk with them about anything. Are we not connected? Because I met a lot very good people in online space and with some I still keep the contact from time to time.

>teach by example so that others may see it and do the same

Being "good" and "moral" isn't rewarding. People are programmed as all animals to search for a) easier ways b) get rewarded for doing so.

>What else do we have other than decency?

Some of us still have one's self.

>Why shackle your brain when the world is so full of knowledge?

I'm not interested in knowing more actually. I'm saying it in all seriousness. I'm very well aware that there is more to know than what I know right now but I'm not tempted anymore to discover any other subject than psychology and meaning. I think we have opposite priorities. I also never understood this "I want to live because I want to gather knowledge and experiences". It's so alien concept to me. I always wanted to live because I thought there is something deeper hidden behind this curtain of reality, until the time since I genuinely started to flirt with death.

>I just have a disdain for the so called "locked self", or the concept of the rational egoist which is so deeply embedded in our culture.

Yes I know what you mean and indeed it's one of the toxic elements in society, however I wouldn't really blame people for doing this. Imo it comes back to doing rewarding things and being selfish prick is rewarding. Also, I don't really blame people for going their own way, not giving any shits, being self-concerned, it's their life and I can't be messiah running around to tell people to open their hearts (or as you called it, being 24/7 hippie).

>>22165

>If you hit a wall, rethink why you got there in the first place, reevaluate, adjust… Or tear it down if that's the right thing to do!

Those were nice thoughts but what if it's not in your possibilities to adjust? We can't be anything we want, we can only be for what we have capabilities to become (+ work towards it).

>Morality and good deeds should be as natural as breathing

It's nice thought but in practice you again hit the barrier of morality - what's moral and if morality is subjective, it's really a moral thing to act upon someone else, would it be something more than me enforcing my power on someone's else life? In this basic thought, it comes out that being moral is purely fascistic act. That's my problem. I give you example:

>my friend has bf

>she is unhappy with him sometimes but still in love with him, hoping it gets better

<option a: I will tell her to leave him because [reasons]. - Me influencing somehow her life in a way >>>I<<< find to be correct. The result is uncertain. It's moral in a sense because I think it's better for her and I want to help her. Is it justified? No.

<option b: I will tell her to stay with him because [reasons and spooks] - Same conclusion.

<option c: I will stay out of this bullshit and tell her to make the decision herself. Is this not moral? Am I being a jerk?

Sorry for so poor example but I hope it describes well my problem with morality and its subjective matter. I see you also admitted there isn't objective morality, so you are aware of this.

>Oh they can, but you have to teach them to do so (again, by example!)

This is also a fun one, since I'm not sure if "staying in dark" isn't better than to face the reality. You can teach someone to think and he will suddenly see the struggles. You can leave him as he is and he will be happy. On such a huge scale as is our global society, it makes no difference since we are overpopulated anyway and if I as doomer say that everything is fucked up beyond recovery, then I can't be bothered if I live among monkeys or thinking human beings.

>>22181

Noted. Will respond later on, as now I am sleepy and wouldn't want to insult your intelligence.

My first tip of advice would be not to characterize your self completely on a meme caricature. It's okay to wear them as a label for fun, but implement something else into your life to strive for a more complete deck.

My second tip of advice would be to stop trying to filter out tragedy as some unnatural part of the human experience.

I've made it into my thirties because of a bunch of esoteric bullshit and philosophy that would probably dry your eyeballs out if I typed it all here. If you keep going, eventually you'll stumble upon the pneuma of your existence, and from there it's a roller coaster ride of creative destruction.

>>22182

>I am sleepy and wouldn't want to insult your intelligence.

Sleep well and no worries, I'm pretty dumb, take it easy.

>>22075

don't wait

off yourself now

>>22144

so you dont kill yourself? is it cool and edgy to kill yourself?

>>22193

>trading long-term happiness for short-term happiness

trading short for long! cheeky lil typo there ;)

>>22193

Ok now I see in order to become a bloomer, you have to lie to yourself all the time or be dumb enough to actually believe your own bs. No self-pity, no alcoholism, just work out. Wow, the riddle of life is solved. I'm sure no one tried this before. NIGGA JUST BUY MY BOOK: How to be happy in life - 3 easy steps by Dr. Bloomer, step 1: lmao just go outside op *laughing emoji*, step 2: heh don't be sad and dont drink duhhhh, step 3: you're cured thank me later xddDD

>>22196

imagine actually rationalizing your suffering because you're too weak to change

>>22197

I don't have problem with drinking, quite the opposite, I have problem because I can't drink when I would want to. Not crying over my spilled milk, not making from myself victim, used to work out more but meh, I still go for a walks at least. Now where is my bloombux?

>>22187

>is it cool and edgy to kill yourself?

Yes.

>>22084

>How's so?

Because life sucks and I want to die, and this meme is one of the only things that gives me any hope that I might be able to turn my life around.

>Why 27? Why it is such an important age for you?

It could be later, it could be be earlier. By the time you're 30, your path in life is pretty much decided at that point, so if life still sucks, you might as well end it.

>The better question to ask is that if you can believe in blooming, were you really a doomer?

That's the entire point of this thread m8. To figure out if my odds of blooming. Sure blooming is possible, but likely not very probable. As for if I'm a doomer or not, all I know is that I have hated pretty much my entire life on earth.

>If you think the life can be improved by your own activities to a degree that you can see always the positive side - first and foremost that you even believe there is some bright side to begin with - then I guess keep on trying.

My life might be improvable somewhat, but likely not enough to make it worth living.

Undertakerfreak1127 is the only person I know of who was a doomer and successfully became a bloomer. Back in 2013/2014, he always talked about how he had anxiety and depression and wanted to kill himself. Later he got married and moved to Finland, and said that the past year was the best year of his life.

>>22144

Because I'm a hedonist who wants to maximize my own happiness and avoid suffering.

>>22075

>What are the characteristics of doomers who become bloomers

Give up. That's how you become a bloomer. Doomers are subconsciously in a state of defeat. They tried, they failed, and now they perversely worship their misery.

Notice that the bloomer is neither rich nor successful. Not only has he stopped trying, his former goals in life has completely escaped his mind, and now he blissfully accepts his fate.

>>22347

>this meme is one of the only things that gives me any hope that I might be able to turn my life around.

That's the weakest source of hope I ever found. Not that I want to ridicule it or take it away from you but try to find something stronger and more reliable (it's all about psychology). It's good start maybe but don't you want something you can actually take and say "wow shit mate I made it"? I mean, that meme is nothing but concepts all over it, so when you will work towards these concepts and reach them, you won't have nothing too much concrete as reward for the effort. I'm not saying to work out for girls and stupid bullshit like that, not at all, I'm saying more like setting some stricter goals you can work towards to instead of just pure ideas/feelings, people call it ladder of goals. Or do I get it wrong?

Is there truly nothing left? It's actually question I ask to myself recently, if I run out of options on this stupid planet and if there is truly nothing I want to do anymore.

>age

Get it, fair enough.

>To figure out if my odds of blooming.

>Sure blooming is possible, but likely not very probable.

>My life might be improvable somewhat, but likely not enough to make it worth living.

No clue. I would say, maybe if you have this urge in yourself to give life one more try, then go all for it. It's not like you can loose to much if you try. I might not truly share very much positive thinking but still I'd say try and maybe some way in life opens for you.

>>22075

"doomers" are like any other faggot identity group. Get off the miserable parts of the internet and pursue bettering yourself and things you enjoy. You are identifying yourself as a "doomer" and it shapes the way you think. Get out of here and stop being a leaf in the wind. Keep coming here and similar places and thinking the same ways and guess what, you'll be in exactly the same place at 27.

>>22374

>now they perversely worship their misery.

When will this meme end that in order for being doomer you have to cry on your own shoulder and play a victim?

I've been making effort lately to improve my life to the point of "blooming". It's not easy, but I know what I have to do and I'm working on my faults in order to hopefully put myself back on the /bloomer/ path.

To start, I've been doing bodyweight workouts since the beginning of the year; my workout takes about 20 minutes, but I try to do it every day and it does make me feel better when I follow that routine which admittedly I haven't been lately, but that's changing now. On top of this, I decided to quit drinking last weekend, frankly it wasn't really doing anything for me anymore anyway.

Next I've been learning as much as I can about 3d printing so that I can start a side business modeling and printing obscure car parts for people and 3d printing AR lowers; I bought an industrial 3d printer to achieve this purpose (knowing full well that I'll need more when my business takes off). I've also been attending school for cybersecurity as my main focus; I was recently A+ certified and I should be Network+ certified by the end of the month, I even have a potential job offer though the job is pretty shit hours-wise, I would be on call and traveling across the country 2 days a week, at least it pays well.

Lastly, I'm making as much time as I can for my family/friends. I go on walks with my wife and daughter, run a D&D campaign (which I hope to transition to Fantasy Craft) with my brothers and best buddy, and I try to go to family gatherings and talk to my family members within when I have the time. It's a cluster fuck, but that's my life right now.

>tldr I'm doing everything I can to grow as a person and taking steps to improve my life in any way that I can. Don't give up, you'll make it if you try.

>>22378

>Cry on your own sholder

I never said that. You can't ignore the fact that we are all here sharing music and literature. It is clear that on some level people on this board enjoy the emptiness.

>>22389

>It is clear that on some level people on this board enjoy the emptiness.

Yes well but to what degree is that that equal of worshiping misery? I'm personally quite indifferent towards it, it's just my reality and I'm trying to deal with it. I can agree that dealing with it =/= "solving it" (this status quo of indifference is fine by me) but it doesn't mean that people who complain do so because they enjoy being beaten down and trying to get attention or some shit; or do it because they just "enjoy" living this way. A lot people actually asked here for advice, so it's not all so dark imo.

It's also not like everyone can bloom, I certainly can't. I'm trying over decade to somehow get out of certain mindsets and interests which bring conflict into my life and I found out that I can't because I truly don't want to. It's just my nature and without it I would be completely hollow. But at the same time I'm not really mad on people who are positive and successful in current age, or envy them or something, we are just different and I find certain beauty and comfort in darkness, in other words my "misery" is double edged sword which can bring except struggles/pains also a relief from outer world (I think same applies to bloom and constant positivity which can lead to burning out here and there). I learned only very recently to not blame the whole world for my failures (at least not in cases where it's not justified), and in previous months I also realized that even though there is no place for me in this world it isn't such a huge drama as I thought it was. That polish poster was right, a bit of inner peace/harmony can help and I think I found a tiny island of peace in my life which is maybe making me more stable person. It isn't solving anything, I just wanted to illustrate that yes, maybe living in darkness is not all amazing but the fact that you tend to be dark or whatever is not only source of misery but also relief. If you are master and can balance these things out, I think you might have chance to be stable person and face the good and bad in life without troubles, however I'm not good in doing so, my life is so empty that I have to fill the void with struggles and pathetic entertainment in form of ego roleplay.

Also, if there is anything to lift up my mood and make me feel like not everything is so troublesome, that nothing matters in a good way, that world stopped spinning and I can just exist right here right now and that's fine, that I can be me, then it's comfy bleep.

Today random gay thought appeared in my head that maybe it can be better than it is right now. Maybe it's just finally mid-mid-age crisis calling for something from my past, dropping this shit day to day lifestyle and going back to making art for close to no money whatsoever, getting in touch back with my old arthoe childless and irresponsible friends, brainwash myself into liking fashion again, stirnerpost on leftpol, make sns and post there stuff no one asked for, and so on. No benefits, no improvements, nothing to live or die for, only be more pretentious and play the game everyone else plays while being superobnoxious about it.

This is pathetic, it's just a fucking meme, realize that. Most people here are larping, you need to fix your life and can't rely on a shit meme to tell you the future.

I harder you doom the harder you'll bloom

>>22411

BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!

>>22079

Wow… the whole lot of 12 threads.

>>22448

>Most people here are larping

ALL anons on ALL imageboards are larpers. The key to having a good time on here, if any, is to just run with the memes made by the few anons in each board who actually make funny ones as opposed to regurgitating stale shitposts.

>>23634

>It didn't happen suddenly, I didn't plan on it, I just made small decisions and changes to my daily life that piled up overtime until my entire outlook on life changed.

Tell me more about this bit please because I'm genuinely interested. Here is what I think - I don't really believe any set of typical /sig/ improvement BS can help anyone long term because it's basically brainwashing yourself and it works until some day in the future when you fall back into the hole again. I'm speaking from my personal experience. Long time ago, I tried to improve my life as if "by force", just get back on track and keep on going, it was very temporary. So I'm truly interested in your approach and if you took any of the lifecoach advice like "start working out lmao" or did you really just 100% focused on what brought you joy.

>Anyway, my progression from doomer to bloomer centered around me finding out what things I truly enjoyed and what things I wanted to improve on.

I'm going through similar stuff right now I suppose but it's not changing my views imo. I don't have any urge to truly improve, I just found joy again in being creative. However, my way of coping is more tied to ""identity"", not sure how should I put it. I just need to be somebody I can stand for at least 1 day until I go sleep and that's all. All my life I put my focus outside, to the world and my surroundings until I became pretty isolated. Now my world is 'superficial me' and I find it easier to somehow exist without any real purpose, with more "non-negative" energy I can share outwards, but everything is charade anyway. I don't know what people mean when they say shit like "This is me, I know who I am, I know myself". I'm totally lost but I find it easier to operate if I can be something I personally enjoy, if I feel somehow okay about myself and if I can look into mirror without thinking "who the fuck is this". With this attitude, I can go f.e. to shop and smile on cashier, say to her "thank you" with smile, without looking like I want to shoot up the place. It all starts with you, but nothing is going to be good. You are scarred forever, the question is only how much make up you can put on those scars. If you can go from doomer to bloomer, either you are able to lie to yourself or you can roleplay very well, which is admirable because roleplaying is fun.

>and feel some ambition for once.

I don't think that's necessary because people tend to burn out without right mindset. I also don't think that improving your life is meaningful activity. You can just live for the sake of living and do what you want to do just because you want to do it. Ambition and self-improvement is usually boomer advice for hyperactive extrovert NPCs. Long-term planning is actually western concept mainly, not some universal truth. I don't know why, ambition usually means for me "moving through obstacles even if it's not enjoyable" and I don't like to do what I don't enjoy.

>Don't be a NEET, structure and outside criticism helps more than you realize.

Day to day 9-5 jobs are for suckers. Worst advice on this board so far. If I can give people and especially zoomers here one advice - if you don't want to work in any field, then take any way possible and never work and rather waste it by playing vidya. Days when you could aimlessly pick some job and try always something new, and then eventually find what you might like, are gone. Most jobs are slave labor and it doesn't matter if you are laying bricks for some boomer or working in IT corporation. Do you want something? Find what you like first and get self-employed if you want to. Don't fall into job meme, it won't help you in self-discovery.

>have never been in a relationship

Why relationships even matter for you? Finally we moved to age when being single is totally normal and whole internet cries because they never had relationship. Relationships have no real connection to overall happiness. They just happen spontaneously and are mixed bags of happiness and problems like everything else in life. No girl/boii will or even should drag you out of your own shit imo. Nothing hurts more than finding out that other person is with you just because you are his/hers way to not kys. It's toxic.

Sorry about the mocking but I can't really imagine I would be bothered in my life by topics such as if I'm able to talk with other people (which is easy as breathing). None of those issues matter irl but good luck with your trip to bloom, whatever works for you mate, I'm not denying from you your ways, I just don't get it and I can't imagine living life like that. Such goals only made me feel worse.

>>23681

>looking at myself in general and figuring out where I wanted to be in life, and helped me look forward to the next day, and have something fun to look back on with pride

I see now. So you had to find some sort of motivation and maybe set some goals along the way, like in general terms, not as "I want to change this and this in 3 months" but more like "i should maybe change this aspect about me or try this activity and see how it goes", right?

>Maybe it sounds stupid but not being ashamed of how my hands look is a big change for me. I've tried to quit countless times in my life but it's only now that I've succeeded.

Good stuff, it's nice. I maybe know what you are trying to tell me but I don't know where you get this willpower from. It seems to me as you have to find some certain things you want to change first and that's the biggest issue.

>What activity is meaningful then? Beats browsing chans all day and jerking off. It makes me fall asleep better, anyway.

I mean it more in a way, that if you have to force it, then it's meaningless. It never worked for me this way, nothing. If I had to force anything in my life, all effort faded away into nothingness. I also change, and possibly often for the better, but it's not like I want it, I just do when is the right time. If I decide now that I want to quit smoking, I wouldn't make it because I would have to bruteforce myself through the process and I would have no good feeling out of it even if I would make it. In other words, I don't have this sense of reward coming from doing things for myself. Ok I stopped smoking, so what? While you would feel pretty damn good about it, like you achieved something, right? My brain is wired in different way, I don't really value myself that much highly, I live with myself because I have to, not because I want to. I'm like my own roommate, that roommate you know it's there living with you but you don't really care about him unless he steals your food from fridge.

I'm more calm than I used to be before, focusing more on the good rather than drowning myself daily in the bad, but it's not like I decided to change it and force myself to change myself, it just happened. I have no control over this whatsoever.

>For me, ambition is working towards something I'm looking towards.

Okay, this is good and valid mentality. I totally ignored fact something like this could exist.

>Do you really think you're "better", or need to be better, than ~80% of people your age?

Not really and even I had shitty grindy work before which I sort of enjoyed because I could spend time in it thinking. But it was still a work, I wouldn't do it for free. I don't think I deserve better, I think that we as "young" people can do better now and technology allows us to do better, however there are different issues related to this, it goes even into politics/economy and I find it pointless to elaborate on this subject too much. In short, I'd rather work for bare minimum or totally for free on projects I like. I think we have now this luxury of young people being able to do whatever they want (probably more in mutual/socialist sort of way, where you do something because you are free to do so, FOSS projects already work in this way and if they get solid financial backing, then it's great;;; same things are streamers and artists who get royalties rather than salary), however our systems are set up still in an old way, so you have young people bored to death, often on psych meds, in corporations or fast food services, just so they can pay the rent every month. I'm pretty optimistic about this issue though and this will definitely change (if we will have the opportunity) but it won't happen in horizon of next decade or two. I think people nowadays care more about each other because we are sort of in the same shit globally, we see that the world needs to change but at the same time we are still selfish pricks, so it's mixed bag. Unlike tradposters, I welcome new opportunities of income, even if it's e-whoring, and I welcome anything that makes us more free as individuals and as communities and society.

>I'd like to figure out what's beyond initial attraction.

Good luck with that. No matter how terrible my previous relationship was, it was also full of great moments and feelings. I just don't search for anyone atm so that was my point.

>It's a long, slow, grind that will never end.

We could go into philosophy right over here but I assume it wouldn't help with anything. You don't ask yourself that question like "ok but what is this for?" or "why should I even bother?". I struggle to answer those questions without help of complete spooks like "you matter" or "lmao God made us this way" etc.

>>23634

>Don't be a NEET

I tried factory work, office / workshop work, student life and unemployed but looking for work life. I hated every single one of those. Especially my last jawb. Waste of time for people like me. I would love to start my own company but I have no idea what to do.

>ambitions

I never had any ambitions beyond being comfy, eating my favorite food and slacking away the entire day

And of course trading cards. I would never call myself gamer or count myself as /v/idya gayme connaisseur but trading cards have always been my #1 interest and my collection is complete already. There simply is nothing left for me to do that I care about.

>suicide

death gotta be easy cause life is hard

>I'd like to figure out what's beyond initial attraction.

Allow me to explain.

<reptillian brain sees boob animal that looks good

<reptillian brain sends you the giddy feels

<so you bust your ass to impress her

<so that there will be ficki ficki

<so that there will be baby

<brain successfully tricked you into creating baby

humans are shallow, they select mates for looks mostly

or they settle for ugly partners and then hate their lives and feel like they only scored a "you tried" trophy

of course there are exceptions but those are the stories you read in baww threads where anon and anonette meet each other already when they are children or at least in high school. for most people, this will be a movie plot only and they will never have that

Sorry for late reply, busy week.

>>23682

> more like "i should maybe change this aspect about me or try this activity and see how it goes", right?

Yeah, that's a good way to put it.

>I don't know where you get this willpower from.

I don't always know either. Sometimes I draw it from looking to the future, sometimes it's from looking at the past. I used to have a bit of a masturbation addiction and what helped me overcome that was asking myself if that's what I wanted to do when I was younger. For some reason that clicked in my head and made me force myself to limit my masturbation.

>you have to find some certain things you want to change first and that's the biggest issue.

That's a good point. It's part of the struggle of finding yourself. I can't really help you, but I think part of what helped me was getting back into reading. Reading promotes introspection.

>Ok I stopped smoking, so what? While you would feel pretty damn good about it, like you achieved something, right?

Eh, not really. I dip tobacco and I've thought about quitting that but I choose not to. I enjoy it more than the dangers bother me. Perhaps you're the same way with smoking. Part of being a better person is realizing when you should do what you want to even if other people don't agree with it.

Course, if you're worried about being addicted, you could try quitting for a month and seeing how you hold up.

I think if you found a few things to do for yourself you might start to appreciate them, even if they don't give you immediate gratification. Even if they're not major, it could be as low-effort as going through a backlog of movies you wanted to see. I remember one thing I kept pushing off was playing a couple old text-adventure games. I always had a soft spot for them but no-one else seems to care about them. At first it was hard to play a game knowing I'd never have anyone to discuss it with, but they've become fond memories to look back on.

>I'm more calm than I used to be before… it just happened

That's good. It might not seem conscious, but you're probably more content with life now than you were before.

>You don't ask yourself that question like "ok but what is this for?" or "why should I even bother?"

I do. Lately the answer the answer I've given myself is "maybe it's a slog, but it's better than the alternative". To give a metaphor to explain that, imagine life is a tank of gas in a car. I could sit in my car and let the engine idle until it runs empty. I could drive my car off a cliff and get it over with. Or I could go down the highway and check out the sights on the way, maybe stop at some towns and meet some people.

>>23703

>trading cards have always been my #1 interest and my collection is complete already. There simply is nothing left for me to do that I care about.

Have you looked at communities built around trading cards? They sound like a niche interest you could share and discuss with others.

><reptillian brain

I've had genuine friendships and they incline me to believe that there can be more to relationships than animal thoughts. I don't disagree with the second thing you said though, I know my sister is settling for a guy she's indifferent towards to provide for her. Lots of people do it, no denying that.