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/sapphic/ - Sapphic Dreams

All things sapphic

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Rules

File: d2eaece03433820⋯.jpg (67.06 KB,620x711,620:711,d2eaece0343382091aa18a31a7….jpg)

 No.52 [View All]

the funny thread

85 posts and 59 image replies omitted. Click [Open thread] to view. ____________________________
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 No.1845

File: fa99176215b9997⋯.png (805.41 KB,580x800,29:40,Ingrid_Pitt.png)

>>1825

>secret society and rituals

Illuminati confirmed?

Three vampiresess walks into a bar. The first one orders a Bloody Mary. The bartender gives it to her and she drinks it. The second also orders a Bloody Mary. The bartender fixes her a Bloody Mary and she drinks it. The third orders a cup of hot water, and the two other vampireses turn to look at her. “What do you want with hot water?” one wants to know. The third vampiress pulls out a used tampon and says “I'm having tea!”

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 No.1853

Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>1845

>Three vampiresess walks into a bar.

Oh primary school days!

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 No.1854

File: f7707db8e18ba14⋯.gif (772.8 KB,512x384,4:3,dale.gif)

>>1845

>Illuminati confirmed?

confirmed

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 No.1873

Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play.

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 No.1876

Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play.

So the insanely hot teacher at school talked to me 5 days ago at work. Just a few sentences but we also were sitting together for a meeting and it's the most we've ever interacted. And now I can't stop thinking about her. Stupid fucking brain. Fucking fuck.

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 No.1877

File: 1b24925f3142866⋯.jpg (23.78 KB,324x324,1:1,scissor_t-shirt.jpg)

>>1876

Did you remember to show off your cherry trick?

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 No.1879

Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>1877

No. I desperately tried to not sperg out and give away the fact that I'm crushing hard on her wihch probably made me look like a sperg. Then she was grooming herself constantly next to me but I don't know if it's because I'm making her uncomfortable. Fairly sure she's straight :(

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 No.1881

File: 7e3a6729af9a675⋯.gif (3.75 MB,280x116,70:29,20u65qu.gif)

>>1879

Can’t say I’ve been in a similar situation before, but “office romances” are tricky enough without the sapphic element.

Maybe this is the time to bring out the Driver persona? Coo, silent and mysterious – short replies.

Or just go for it and send notes: Do you like me?/Guess who likes you

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 No.1883

File: 845eee051cef721⋯.webm (1.08 MB,346x622,173:311,I don't like girls.webm)

>>1881

>“office romances” are tricky enough without the sapphic element.

I know.But I really, really want her.

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 No.1887

Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>1883

Have you considered sigils? Sigils feature in The Ghoul – it seems to me that it is more of a method to focus your thoughts and give you a mental boost. It is explained nicely in the film, and the protagonist makes a sigil of his own to focus on achieving his goal.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sigil#Chaos_magic

What’s the worst that could happen?

“When I started to become interested in magic, I understood that everything that people talk about with regards to magic, is all absolutely true, as long as you understand that it is happening inside people’s minds. And it struck me that that must be what magic is, it must be like treating the space that we perceive in our minds as a kind of territory. And I thought that working on that hypothesis, you could explore that territory.”

— Alan Moore

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 No.1891

File: 3cde0fdfc650fe7⋯.png (130.28 KB,500x805,100:161,diving.png)

>>1887

>Have you considered sigils?

While I like the idea for areas of my life I don't want to be a Thelma.

But maybe I will look into it

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 No.1892

Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play.

Merry almost Christmas anons.

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 No.1893

File: 0b121f5786ff931⋯.gif (2.49 MB,500x260,25:13,Smile.gif)

>>1891

Thelma got the girl and a happy ending!

>>1892

Bah! Hambug!

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 No.1894

File: f7b99cfb04d5972⋯.webm (270.32 KB,478x360,239:180,Dramatic Creepy-chan.webm)

>>1893

>Thelma got the girl and a happy ending!

brb turning into a witch

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 No.1895

File: ffd4e347aa8989a⋯.webm (7.46 MB,720x306,40:17,The Ghoul (2016) – Sigil.webm)

>>1894

But a good witch, right? Just don’t go summoning any daemons, and never go full Willow. You can do this! Don’t let your dreams be dreams!

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 No.1897

File: 944040a271d00c9⋯.jpg (134.88 KB,1600x900,16:9,JUST.jpg)

>>1895

>Just don’t go summoning any daemons, and never go full Willow.

If I do any of these things or worse, you have to take me down anon. Promise me!

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 No.1898

File: 530ea55b5f61dc8⋯.jpg (847.11 KB,1000x976,125:122,FA_image_00045296.jpg)

>>1897

I’ll do my very best.

Try not to mess it up. Fingers and toes crossed.

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 No.1903

File: dfa09aa61f3ad1b⋯.jpg (261.66 KB,800x3177,800:3177,lady-bouviers-new-lover.jpg)

The Simpsons thread over at /tv/ reminded me of these “Dark Simpsons” edits, and this one is spot on here.

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 No.1925

Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>1903

Poor Homer.

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 No.1926

File: 46024176afa11c5⋯.png (74.48 KB,200x273,200:273,1531783982543.png)

>>1897

>>1895

>>1898

witches are lewd and don't exist.

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 No.1929

File: 567f9dbfc3aa823⋯.gif (1.35 MB,200x200,1:1,Ruby.gif)

>>1926

Yes, of course. Just silly talk.

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 No.1940

File: b7485133db49ff5⋯.webm (10.02 MB,720x576,5:4,BtVS - S4E9 - Something B….webm)

>>1926

>witches are lewd and don't exist.

Watch it buddy, or I'll turn you into a rat….eventually.

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 No.2380

Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play.

Whoever made this didn't call it a YTP.

But that's exactly what it is and it's bloody excellent!

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 No.2516

File: c351666a85a9d05⋯.webm (2 MB,960x716,240:179,right_in_the_kisser.webm)

>>2380

>But that's exactly what it is and it's bloody excellent!

Agreed.

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 No.2897

File: 85f168e035370e5⋯.webm (5.55 MB,720x404,180:101,nogrilsontheinternet.webm)

>tfw there really are no girls on the internet

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 No.3088

File: 3a07097a47e366b⋯.jpg (1.57 MB,2397x1573,2397:1573,Ad_for_The_Sims_2_in_PC_Ga….jpg)

>>2897

Surely there must be some girls out there. Instagram maybe?

Only crossdressers and LARPers on imageboards nowadays.

Came across this ad for The Sims 2 in an old, scanned copy PC Gamer magazine on the Internet Archive the other day. I imagine there would be heads rolling if this ad was made now.

We really didn’t know how good things were back then… ;_;

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 No.3101

File: 99d1d1a273a073f⋯.png (1.06 MB,1920x800,12:5,barry.png)

File: 7c98ec3dbbb8cb3⋯.png (888.55 KB,1920x800,12:5,knob.png)

I know what you're thinking: 'Did he play ten songs or only nine?' Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being this is Hello, I Must Be Going!, the most powerful album in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I like Phil Collins?' Well, do you, punk? Because I Don't Care Anymore.

Dirty Harry x American Psycho x Beyond the Black Rainbow x deadwax. It's probably the most dense crossover funpost I've ever done.

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 No.3111

>>2516

Damn that must have hurt

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 No.3194

File: 48a6a5799e46df0⋯.jpg (621.65 KB,2000x1334,1000:667,201023_gay_penguins_pingui….jpg)

<The gay male African penguins, who made headlines last year when they stole an egg from a heterosexual couple, have now stolen a lesbian duo’s nest.

Gay male penguins steal lesbian couple's eggs at Dutch Zoo: https://archive.vn/sqYlR / http://web.archive.org/web/20201023234325/https://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/gay-male-penguins-steal-lesbian-couple-s-eggs-dutch-zoo-n1244575

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 No.3195

>>3194

Faggots are truly the niggers of sex, in this case even literal Africans.

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 No.3304

File: 9c00aa0fc5767c7⋯.mp4 (11.62 MB,730x452,365:226,clownworld.mp4)

File: 7a2e495a68643c4⋯.jpg (31.53 KB,637x170,637:170,catlesbian.jpg)

File: b8c502d35972ca9⋯.jpg (38.35 KB,604x209,604:209,_lesbian_.jpg)

File: d6742b18b484194⋯.jpg (46.22 KB,592x214,296:107,this_is_a_lesbian.jpg)

File: b774b85d3b614bb⋯.jpg (40.38 KB,735x180,49:12,thisisalesbian.jpg)

>>3088

>We really didn’t know how good things were back then… ;_;

Ain't it always the way. I want out of the snakepit.

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 No.3305

File: 4c5f9f4f7a618ba⋯.jpg (126.06 KB,1000x1290,100:129,bb352f.jpg)

>>3304

<“Wait a minute! Isn’t anyone here a real lesbian?”

Funny and sad at the same time.

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 No.3431

>>211

>Keyle and Pee

This sketch is adorable, considering that one of them now stars in woke Netflix shit and the other one has made a great career of directing race-baiting movies where white people are evil and/or retarded.

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 No.3432

File: d8028f452f02ff1⋯.png (1.17 MB,1280x1522,640:761,trannies_movie_night.png)

>>2897

I laugh hard at the "lesbian" MTF trannies. Even though they got them turned inside-out, they still have the biggest balls on Earth. Only a complete soylord would ever have the gall to attempt shit on real lesbians like "Hey, I'm a female lesbian, too! It's transphobic of you to not want to lick my exceedingly long clitoris!"

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 No.3435

File: f68821a82f37f29⋯.png (587.47 KB,880x645,176:129,1595245528234.png)

File: 55aac40fea067c1⋯.jpg (226.53 KB,1076x1518,538:759,EnWGzTxWMAIGlmy.jpg)

File: 4c50a873a6daa8b⋯.jpg (139.2 KB,1356x1364,339:341,EhYXsnGXsAMUV8B.jpg)

File: a8111ed12cdfbf0⋯.jpg (93 KB,882x1130,441:565,EhYbyKRXYAAOv8l.jpg)

>>3432

>"Hey, I'm a female lesbian, too! It's transphobic of you to not want to lick my exceedingly long clitoris!"

IKR, the AUDACITY.

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 No.3491

File: 732db5fc5ccbb4d⋯.jpg (209.54 KB,929x448,929:448,732.jpg)

Came across this meme by accident. Was surprised to read that the source is not hentai.

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 No.3494

File: fbf212350eddb41⋯.png (3.67 KB,606x174,101:29,am_I_being_memed_on.png)

>>3491

Kek. I still don't really get using gay male sex terms for lesbians. Sure there is dominance and submission but it is constantly in flux during sex.

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 No.3495

File: 8c813d0185e844b⋯.png (397.49 KB,831x442,831:442,8c8.png)

>>3494

Maybe something got lost in translation? They probably have some other term for a lesbian who is more submissive in bed in Japan to contrast the gay male terms.

The author/artist (Mikawa Miso) is female according to her pixiv profile (https://www.pixiv.net/en/users/3099294),she specialises in yuri mangas, and the first thing on her Twitter bio is “I like tits” (https://nitter.net/mkw_bkn2), so I assume she has first-hand (or hands-on) experience to draw from.

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 No.3501

File: 1b928db67661688⋯.png (116.63 KB,770x415,154:83,1610371228027.png)

>>3495

>so I assume she has first-hand (or hands-on) experience to draw from.

Meh, she could tell me she's an attack helicopter. Would make as much sense.

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 No.3511

File: da1cab589101666⋯.jpg (65.26 KB,460x355,92:71,417135.jpg)

>>3501

You think she is faking it and just making up she assumes lesbians are getting up to behind closed doors?

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 No.3513

File: dce3101767287f3⋯.jpg (139.99 KB,1300x875,52:35,ENrvEVqXkAAfPMb.jpg)

>>3511

>You think she is faking it and just making up she assumes lesbians are getting up to behind closed doors?

Possibly. Or just being nonsensical.

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 No.3551

File: c19232a8607ed0c⋯.webm (9.26 MB,720x540,4:3,VoD_the_cupboard.webm)

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 No.3552

File: 432b7336115b95e⋯.webm (15.26 MB,720x540,4:3,VoD_Lesbehonest.webm)

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 No.3553

File: efd63d37b1cf672⋯.webm (15.18 MB,640x480,4:3,VoD_Rachel_Hunter.webm)

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 No.3554

File: 734108fdef3d3bb⋯.webm (15.1 MB,640x480,4:3,VoD_librarian.webm)

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 No.3564

File: 80a5618667ff892⋯.jpeg (43.11 KB,406x406,1:1,6445278.jpeg)

File: 457442fe28dd4bd⋯.jpeg (509.86 KB,811x579,811:579,Lady_Dimitrescu_Snegovski.jpeg)

>>3513

Never thought I would see well done lewd Wojak edits…

This upcoming has some top tier /sapphic/ themed maymays and fanart potential as well.

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 No.3592

File: fd6af6fcb0b8ee1⋯.webm (10.12 MB,462x260,231:130,LesbiantouchingASMR_licki….webm)

Think this comes from a WebM thread from /b/

Remember seeing some ASMR connoisseurs over at /tingles/ argue if one of the ASMR “artists” they were discussing was a lesbian.

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 No.3629

File: daaeabf534c5493⋯.webm (881.2 KB,480x848,30:53,1608666923914.webm)

>>3592

Wtf is that video? Could only make it about 3 mins in. Of course it came from /b/.

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 No.3631

File: cbfe0ff3ddc2336⋯.webm (1.19 MB,460x460,1:1,1613392717922.webm)

>>3629

It is a pretty spot on parody of ASMR “artists”.

<Vagina Dentata lift

Looks like she never skips leg pussy day at the gym and has Kegel muscles of steel.

Seen videos of guys (in Japan?) lifting weights with their tackle; wonder how much a chick could lift if she did her Kegel exercises every day 🤔

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 No.3639

File: 467dbeb33aa1d6d⋯.png (88.54 KB,480x480,1:1,_.png)

File: 1025e79a7441d92⋯.jpeg (413.86 KB,1078x1071,154:153,_.jpeg)

ого, лесбухи (wow, lesbians)

Ничего себе, женщины альтернативной сексуальной ориентации (Wow, women of alternative sexual orientation)

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