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An Exercise in Satire

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All Hail The Bum Bum King!

File: 7e50133fdcb3368⋯.png (10.72 KB,1424x574,712:287,image.png)

28f35a No.385951 [View All]

No time for links it's an emergency!

694 posts and 301 image replies omitted. Click [Open thread] to view. ____________________________
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02d2b8 No.386646

>A Muslim must first find an acceptable place away from standing water, people's pathways, or shade.[2] They are advised that it is better to enter the area with the left foot,[3] facing away from the Qiblah (prayer point).[4] It is reported in the hadith of Bukhari that whenever Muhammad went to the toilet, he said, Bismillahi Allahumma Inni Audhubika Minal Khubsi Wal Khabais ("In the name of Allah, O Allah! I seek refuge/protection with/in You from all offensive and wicked things") (alternate translation: "from evil deeds and evil spirits" and "from the male and female unclean spirits").[5] Following this prophetic ideal, Muslims are advised to say this supplication before entering into the toilet.

>While on the toilet, one must remain silent. Talking, answering greetings, or greeting others is strongly discouraged.[4] When defecating together, two men cannot converse, nor look at each other's genitals. [6] Eating any food while on the toilet is strictly forbidden.[4]

>The anus must be washed with water using the left hand after defecating. Similarly, the penis and vulva must be washed with water with the left hand after urinating. This washing is known as istinja. The Qur'an suggests that one should wash one's hands as well, which is discussed in verse 5:6.

>When leaving the toilet, one is advised to leave with the right foot,[3] and also say a prayer – "Praise be to Allah who relieved me of the filth and gave me relief."[4]

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8f3006 No.386647

>>386644

oooohhh the hokey pokey

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ad27c6 No.386648

>>386646

>tfw i already wash my willy after a wee

Inshallah tbh lads

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6deddd No.386649

FILM STARTING

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9b17c5 No.386650

>>386635

It's a place that exists!

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de8794 No.386651

File: 8ce4f9b2e3453a7⋯.png (53.65 KB,850x638,425:319,1a58f2d72fbad808b434719f12….png)

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ad27c6 No.386652

>>386615

>>386611

Loads of couples have kids out of wedlock, such as me, afaik being legally married isn't relevant, it's residence that counts. I'm all ears if I'm wrong though.

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02d2b8 No.386653

>>386652

lawful marriage just hands a magic button to destroy your life and take all your money into the woman's devious paws, tbh

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ad27c6 No.386654

67. And recall when Moses said to his people, “God commands you to sacrifice a heifer.” They said, “Do you make a mockery of us?” He said, “God forbid that I should be so ignorant.”

68. They said, “Call upon your Lord to show us which one.” He said, “He says she is a heifer, neither too old, nor too young, but in between. So do what you are commanded.”

69. They said, “Call upon your Lord to show us what her color is.” He said, “He says she is a yellow heifer, bright in color, pleasing to the beholders.”

70. They said, “Call upon your Lord to show us which one; the heifers look alike to us; and God willing, we will be guided.”

71. He said, “He says she is a heifer, neither yoked to plow the earth, nor to irrigate the field; sound without blemish.” They said, “Now you have brought the truth.” So they slew her; though they almost did not.

This is some deep lore right here

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02d2b8 No.386655

Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play.

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338bf9 No.386656

>the filter just breaks and I can't hide the retard's posts

AAAAAAUGH

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02d2b8 No.386657

>>386656

just read them, lad. and give me (you)'s

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338bf9 No.386658

ah it's working again

just the invidious post with the idiot's dumb face on it

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ad27c6 No.386659

>>386656

Allah (swt) wants you to live for ever in paradise, lad

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f52634 No.386660

File: bfd7ead64a6a116⋯.png (1.54 MB,900x1200,3:4,ClipboardImage.png)

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3e5f67 No.386661

>>386660

Need her to gallop across my bollocks until there's nothing left but a pool of blood and pink mush

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992643 No.386662

File: 6ae00f5af867dc2⋯.jpg (214.45 KB,800x533,800:533,1527990297005.jpg)

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3e5f67 No.386663

File: eadd4fc67507fa5⋯.png (239.82 KB,340x270,34:27,ClipboardImage.png)

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3e5f67 No.386664

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3e5f67 No.386665

>>386535

love a big puffy fanny tbh

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3e5f67 No.386666

need a new show to watch, any recommendations?

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da0dde No.386667

>>386649

What are you lads watching?

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f52634 No.386668

File: bd33ddb6a3e2bc2⋯.jpg (451.09 KB,1100x920,55:46,bd3.jpg)

>>386667

mel kino

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992643 No.386669

File: 049f29f811b2050⋯.jpg (192.63 KB,1280x960,4:3,1539185118496.jpg)

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ad27c6 No.386670

File: 007a4ce9b490260⋯.png (35.62 KB,512x512,1:1,wewtoast.png)

>>386655

Finally got around to watching this video, wish I hadn't

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ad27c6 No.386671

>>386664

It's not noncery if they look fertile tbh

>>386666

Watch gachimuchi videos on youtube

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506cd9 No.386672

>>386651

FUCK 22ST!

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ad27c6 No.386673

>>386672

Will do, but I'll have to fuck the other 21 first

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9b17c5 No.386674

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

classic

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9b17c5 No.386675

File: 169ac92409e8821⋯.png (927 KB,1168x608,73:38,ClipboardImage.png)

>tfw no Jurian Jurian Jurian

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f52634 No.386676

feels like an early night tonight lads feeling sleepy

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de8794 No.386677

File: 92cfa46969b0999⋯.gif (1014.78 KB,368x270,184:135,1459904221703.gif)

>>386674

>classic

Tbh.

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de8794 No.386678

>>386676

Night lad.

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506cd9 No.386679

File: 8f3256e54389109⋯.png (608.96 KB,1014x788,507:394,NEVERFORGIVE.png)

>>386673

*suddenly jelly*

nobody fucks 22st but me!

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506cd9 No.386680

>>386676

yeah me too tbh

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128c05 No.386681

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

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6deddd No.386682

>>386674

listening to this a lot when at the gym smh

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6deddd No.386683

d-don't look at the post number of the thread

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de8794 No.386684

File: 51c750f4f04ba8c⋯.png (9.68 KB,454x408,227:204,1a58f2d72fbad808b434719f12….png)

>>386672

Good lad.

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ad27c6 No.386685

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efac49 No.386686

You could tell that film would be awful just from the name

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9b17c5 No.386687

File: a2a195bb3a4dee4⋯.png (1.17 MB,900x900,1:1,ClipboardImage.png)

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821e62 No.386688

File: 078381e88b3480d⋯.png (619.57 KB,733x900,733:900,078381e88b3480d40d1ad742dd….png)

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02d2b8 No.386689

need a new thread

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efac49 No.386690

File: 957a517830327b1⋯.jpg (54.64 KB,593x877,593:877,D2iGxRtWoAIl4QI.jpg)

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6deddd No.386691

>>386690

god i wish that were me

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128c05 No.386692

File: 2a56241c3a01392⋯.jpg (83.02 KB,640x799,640:799,Jewess 663.jpg)

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6deddd No.386693

>>386692

>those cheek scar

the joker

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ad27c6 No.386694

>>386692

>tfw no uzbek gf

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f52634 No.386697

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