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An Exercise in Satire

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All Hail The Bum Bum King!

File: 7c6c7f51c00da8f⋯.png (905.28 KB,976x549,16:9,ClipboardImage.png)

7c85b0 No.365268 [View All]

Rare snow rollers spotted in field near Marlborough

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-wiltshire-47108382

A rare natural phenomenon which makes it look like wheels of snow have been rolled on their own has been captured in photos.

>Six rare "snow rollers" were spotted by Brian Bayliss in Wiltshire.

>He said he spotted them in a field he owns and at first thought they had been manmade but there were no footprints.

>It is thought the bales are formed when wind conditions are ideal to blow chunks of snow along, picking up more snow along the way.

Brexit: UK still safe in no-deal scenario, says Javid

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-47108445

Home Secretary Sajid Javid has said the UK would remain "one of the safest countries in the world" in the event of a no-deal Brexit.

>But he told the BBC's Andrew Marr Show that there would be a "change in capability" in terms of access to certain security databases.

>He also said a general election was the "last thing this country needs".

>His comments on security come after the Met's counter-terrorism chief said no deal would be "very bad" for policing.

Tory HQ Draw Up Plans to Delay Brexit and Fight June 6th Election

https://www.breitbart.com/europe/2019/02/03/tory-hq-draw-up-plans-to-delay-brexit-and-fight-june-6th-election/

Conservative Party officials are reportedly drawing up plans to delay Brexit, secure support for an EU deal in April, and hold a snap election on June 6th.

>The Remain-supporting Mail on Sunday newspaper reports that the party has begun “block-booking printing plants”, presumably for campaign materials, “and hiking its spending on digital advertising.”

>Prime Minister Theresa May had promised backbench MPs she would not lead the party into its next election battle, but has reneged on such guarantees before — for example, when she said she would not call a snap election in 2017, before doing so anyway and losing her parliamentary majority, despite winning a significantly larger share of the vote than predecessor David Cameron.

701 posts and 234 image replies omitted. Click [Open thread] to view. ____________________________
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3ffe5a No.365971

File: 9be631535dab00e⋯.png (80.31 KB,255x255,1:1,depressedpepe.png)

>da still hasn't responded

time to figure out how to take public transport and infect as many golems with my cold as possible

>>365933

tbh

I want a relationship, I'm not some 56% mudshit or a wigger who only wants casual sex

partly why I'm so depressed is realizing that you faggots are the only real friends I will ever have and anyone I actually meet face to face if I eg move to a city will be fucking retarded normgroids and any whamen will be even worse

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3ea2f6 No.365972

Gonna have a pure time

Everyone's a nobur mind

Hashasha shashhino

Berieve in a sign of zeta

Beyond the hard times from now

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3ea2f6 No.365973

Lads, have a pure time. with me

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3ea2f6 No.365974

File: c4ad520ba0ff1c1⋯.png (21.01 KB,632x554,316:277,tbh21.png)

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3ffe5a No.365975

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>no reponses to texts or email

>too late to take public transport

>if I phone up to reschedule he may appear anyway and complain

AAAAAAAGH

>>365973

being pure is so awkward though, look at charls

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3b94e5 No.365976

Finally got a job interview lads

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3ffe5a No.365977

he arrived, thank fuck

>>365976

hope it goes well lad

and that it's something you actually want to do

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30651f No.365978

File: 2fa1fe9bc017aba⋯.gif (2.98 MB,340x388,85:97,aye_aye_aye_aye.gif)

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645a1d No.365979

>>365975

didnt even watch this one because its just some guy banging on about veganism

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3ffe5a No.365980

>>365979

I haven't watched any through, just the first ten minutes and quit because of the awkwardness

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30651f No.365981

File: 673eead807791ba⋯.jpg (65.77 KB,900x900,1:1,71777.jpg)

>>365975

He's lost it I can't watch these

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3ea2f6 No.365982

>>365981

Did he ever have it?

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f81940 No.365983

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>5:34

lmao

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3ffe5a No.365984

File: ac762992c6f5f74⋯.png (190.52 KB,628x795,628:795,apushart.png)

>need a no2

>about to get up and go

>massive sneeze cough

>

the most humiliating illness I have endured

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19c7c7 No.365985

File: 02cf483309024ff⋯.png (41.91 KB,436x441,436:441,existence is pain.png)

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3b94e5 No.365986

>>365977

It relevant and good enough tbh, the only downside is that it's in London but hey ho

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3ea2f6 No.365987

File: 4dd30f2c19789c0⋯.webm (3.75 MB,540x720,3:4,nod to the rythmn.webm)

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b65920 No.365988

>>365984

this post shall forever be screencapped

5/2/19

the day wessex shat himself

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98916a No.365989

>>365988

>wessex's really annoying poo

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b65920 No.365990

another one of those maggoty things crawling on the wall again

what the FUCK are these things and where on earth do they come from

they're grey, have a small bit of black at the front of them, like some weird slug antenna

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3b94e5 No.365991

>>365990

Take a picture lad

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19c7c7 No.365992

File: 63c4bcacc770c6b⋯.jpg (22.97 KB,1000x667,1000:667,do-silverfish-live-in-drai….jpg)

>>365990

silverfish?

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b65920 No.365993

>>365991

gone now, cant see it probably fell onto the floor behind the desk

>>365992

nah, it is slow, maggot/slug like

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b65920 No.365994

ugh lad youve given memories of living in a council flat where there were always silverfish in the bathroom

GRIM

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b65920 No.365995

>finger joints sore as fuck from weightlifting

WHY

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c7da52 No.365996

big farts and poos

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b65920 No.365997

love watching womens arses as they walk down the road, tbh

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bd55fe No.365998

File: 64049f841371898⋯.png (279.79 KB,600x370,60:37,ClipboardImage.png)

Odysseus, the first "school" shooter?

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bd55fe No.365999

>>365995

can't remember having that. What were you doing, son?

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b65920 No.366000

>>365999

just curls

maybe i have problems

i have poor circulation in my fingers

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c7da52 No.366001

>>365998

ban assault bows tbh

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bd55fe No.366002

>>366000

Alright. Hate that. Makes my fingers so cold and painful in winter, like right now smh.

>>366001

tbh.

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3ffe5a No.366003

File: 73c4d201ed65e7b⋯.png (6.44 KB,418x408,209:204,backpepe.png)

did the disabled banana interview

the old girl didn't even look at my doctors notes and stuff

didn't let me talk about being a depressed retard

guess i have to hope it goes through on the "strength" of being aspie and going to retard school

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b65920 No.366004

File: 19f23d2ae4f1e66⋯.png (157.11 KB,508x424,127:106,1479752461150.png)

>>366002

IT HURTS BRO

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c7da52 No.366005

File: 034646be5a98071⋯.png (253.93 KB,500x628,125:157,ClipboardImage.png)

>codeine is kicking in

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bd55fe No.366006

File: 2a46e34dd797e94⋯.png (24.63 KB,490x217,70:31,ClipboardImage.png)

>I was the second comment

>he hearted the first one

>he didn't even reply to me

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bd55fe No.366007

>>366003

No idea what the banana interview is tbh

>>366005

You're up early, Elvis

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30651f No.366008

File: 4e6f4a4682c9bf4⋯.jpg (86.39 KB,1280x720,16:9,1549373279580.jpg)

Hello my friends

4chan is down again so here I am

>>366003

>disabled banana interview

What's that exactly?

>>366005

better be all legal, lad

>>366006

who's channel?

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bd55fe No.366009

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>no girl to share an apple with me

>>366008

Ask yourself who you know of that looks like count Orlok, lad

>he still goes to /lgbt/ smh lad I don't get it

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c7da52 No.366010

>>366003

>disabled banana interview

what?

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bd55fe No.366011

File: d20f9ad7e983ffd⋯.png (569.88 KB,720x1038,120:173,ClipboardImage.png)

I just don't get why they do it reee

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bd55fe No.366012

File: 202186e4b4c57bd⋯.png (76.94 KB,330x185,66:37,ClipboardImage.png)

>>366010

he became crippled after shoving it into his arse

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30651f No.366013

File: 5f691216c93324b⋯.png (226.26 KB,400x379,400:379,1549338568168.png)

>>366009

>count orlok

dont even know who that is

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30651f No.366014

oh its dracula

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bd55fe No.366015

File: 0a9e6e3a592a482⋯.png (1.26 MB,1000x750,4:3,ClipboardImage.png)

>the soy face in family photos

oh no

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3ffe5a No.366016

>>366007

>>366010

personal independence payment, it's for cripples and actual retards. people who can barely survive alone basically.

but the local village agent lass said she thought I could get it and if I do I would get rent help to the point of actually being able to afford to move into a shithole in a town where I might get some work.

the utter state of it tbh

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c7da52 No.366017

>>366012

keeeeeek haven't heard of him in a while

>>366013

Have you never seen Nosferatu? smh

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bd55fe No.366018

File: 7b373e93997c820⋯.png (Spoiler Image,1013.91 KB,768x1024,3:4,ClipboardImage.png)

>Women are orcs now

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f81940 No.366019

File: 37a5d01d9f3bc00⋯.png (Spoiler Image,763.87 KB,1717x781,1717:781,subject.png)

>>366011

yeah i don't get the mentality either, donating money to people on the internet. especially when they clearly don't need it.

it's fucking retarded, tbh.

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30651f No.366020

File: 07437bcb58f416c⋯.gif (3.5 MB,320x428,80:107,1549112803943.gif)

>>366016

>tries to claims PIP

>actually went to the interview

If you didn't have me on filter I coulda helped ya

good luck anyways. if they decline your first application then ask for a mandatory reconsideration

>>366017

no im retarded and my attention span is low

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