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An Exercise in Satire

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All Hail The Bum Bum King!

File: 7773409309e6ecd⋯.webm (6.99 MB,720x540,4:3,464.webm)

83356c No.266787 [View All]

links t.somethingelse

Mixed results for Conservatives and Labour in England local elections

>Labour makes gains but falls short in key areas, while Tories see 1% swing outside London

>Labour has made some gains in local elections across England, but after a mixed night of results the party’s hopes of taking control of some key target councils, notably in London, were dashed

>overall, in the first major test of voter opinion since last year’s general election, the main parties remained deadlocked – a result more likely to buoy Theresa May, who at one point had faced predictions of a leadership challenge if the local polls had gone badly for her

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2018/may/04/labour-and-tories-enjoy-mixed-night-of-results-in-local-elections-in-england

Tories snatch key target Barnet Council from under Labour's nose

>the Conservatives have won control of Barnet Council in north London as voters appeared to punish Labour for the antisemitism controversy

>a defeated Labour councillor in West Hendon, where the Conservatives took all three seats, said that the party's inability with the issue of antisemitism cost them victory in Barnet

>Adam Langleben, who also sits on the national executive committee of Jewish Labour, told the Guardian: "Every Jewish Labour household we visited, people said, “not this time"

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/local-election-latest-barnet-london-council-labour-tories-results-a8335691.html

The local elections show a divided Britain: Labour and the Tories are trapped in a stalemate

>Britain has entered a new era of polarised politics. Neither the Conservatives nor Labour are able to revive the hegemony they once enjoyed

>it is the governing party, however, who have most cause for cheer; after multiple political scandals and nearly a decade of austerity, they have nevertheless gained seats

>on both a local and a national level, Labour is not making the gains an opposition needs to be confident of winning power, but nor are the Conservatives close to recovering their squandered majority

https://www.newstatesman.com/politics/uk/2018/05/local-elections-show-divided-britain-labour-and-tories-are-trapped-stalemate

Corbyn has little to celebrate in Britain's local elections

>Britain’s main political parties all made gains in local council elections, benefiting from the collapse of the U.K. Independence Party, in results that saw Jeremy Corbyn’s Labour continue to struggle outside London

>“Labour hasn’t made anything like the expected gains in terms of seats, and is actually going backwards slightly on the national vote share,” said Matt Singh of NumberCruncherPolitics, “these aren’t the results of a party that’s about to storm the next general election"

>“we seem to be seeing an entrenchment of the status quo; a divided Britain in which big cities vote Labour and everywhere else votes Conservative,” said Jonathan Carr-West, chief executive of the Local Government Information Unit

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2018-05-04/corbyn-has-little-to-celebrate-in-britain-s-local-elections

666 posts and 221 image replies omitted. Click [Open thread] to view. ____________________________
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6ee22e No.267457

>>267456

Clacket lane services charge £2.30 for a monster

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c9a21a No.267458

>>267453

Never even seen a red tbh

send me one

>>267454

I'll take that tbh

t'was my first one tbh

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c9a21a No.267459

>>267457

jesus christ w t f

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001807 No.267460

>>267457

>Charging £2.30 for something that has £1.19 printed on it

wew

In that case it's 20 hydro or 3 monsters

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c9a21a No.267461

File: bb20a392ed3864c⋯.jpg (126.56 KB,780x1024,195:256,bb20a392ed3864cba72fbd0ffd….jpg)

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001807 No.267462

>>267458

>Never even seen a red tbh

Manic melon

p good

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c9a21a No.267463

>>267462

>melon

now that's how you make shrop a happy boi

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6ee22e No.267464

>>267458

Fair play before you get in the habit of spliffs, avoid tobacco tbh, the way you inhale and hold in joint smoke makes it cancerous af

My lads say I roll prison style, fuckibg hate smoking chode joints though smfh, little pinch of baccy above the roach then 50/50 mix, never thicker than a cigarette unless its a fuckibg blunt

>>267460

>price marked packs

Oh you sweet summer child

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6ee22e No.267465

File: 9186a7b1762a145⋯.jpg (18.04 KB,442x344,221:172,h9xbvquk02w01.jpg)

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6ee22e No.267466

Can we have a new thread soon please gchqt

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c9a21a No.267467

>>267464

>spoiler

that a fact? I'll remember that one for the future tbh. seems I mostly do spliffs but it often depends on how much you have on you at the time

>prison style

aye that you do tbh. why don't you like big boys? tbf the skinny ones oft pack a punch to em

>>267465

jump up jump up

and get down

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c9a21a No.267468

>>267464

>spoiler

are up supposed to inhale it differently to a cigarette?

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6ee22e No.267469

File: b0d5434c4466814⋯.png (283.73 KB,320x480,2:3,Screenshot_2018-05-12-20-1….png)

arguably the best ribbon-format gummy confectionery

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c9a21a No.267470

File: 43c6688afea0ed9⋯.jpg (86.53 KB,1000x1000,1:1,sherbet straws.jpg)

>>267469

i'd argue that tbf

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6ee22e No.267471

>>267467

>>267468

Big zoots are wasteful as fuck, and aggravate my lungs

A normal small rizla with a pinch of baccy at the roach then about .5g is spot on

>different inhale

… This is raising so many >'s I can't choose which one to type

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001807 No.267472

File: d86fc55fe2add60⋯.png (472.69 KB,564x668,141:167,ClipboardImage.png)

File: 649f0c07b53944c⋯.png (477.55 KB,600x600,1:1,ClipboardImage.png)

>>267470

>ribbon based

If those are ribbons, then the objectively best ribbon format gummy sweet is cables

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6ee22e No.267473

>>267472

They're fuckibg called strawberry cunting pencils you northern monkey fuck

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6ee22e No.267474

AAAAHHHHHHFGGGHGFHHHH

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001807 No.267475

>>267473

nothing about them resembles a pencil

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6ee22e No.267476

>>267475

Put one in a pencil sharpener and then say that

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c9a21a No.267477

>>267471

pinch at the tip is mandatory tbh. don't oft roll slim though. will give it a go

>cant choose

smh lad

>>267472

strawberry pencils are dece but I've gone off them. prefer other colours like blue though

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001807 No.267478

>>267476

by that logic an actual cable resembles a pencil

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c9a21a No.267479

>BIG BLUE pencil

>covered in sherbet

heeeeeeelllll yeah

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c9a21a No.267480

File: 9b78845d645891d⋯.jpg (85.59 KB,500x500,1:1,fizzy-bubblegum-bottles-50….jpg)

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6ee22e No.267481

>>267477

Basically you get most of the nicotine from a quick short immediately released inhale of a cigarette, but longer deeper and held improves THC absorption (don't trust the article that claims it just increases tar deposits, they use tobacco and weed, not plain bud)

>>267478

No

Because a cable doesn't imply a sheath

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c9a21a No.267482

foam strawberries are fukin ace

https://www.handycandy.co.uk/foam-strawberries

>>267481

well I never tbh

was pretty wasteful with it the other night it seems. doesn't matter tho it was a free 50bag p much TBF

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6ee22e No.267483

ca·ble

noun

a thick rope of wire or nonmetallic fiber, typically used for construction, mooring ships, and towing vehicles.

an insulated wire or wires having a protective casing and used for transmitting electricity or telecommunication signals

>casing

Fuck I did myself over proper

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c9a21a No.267484

fuck I left a tenner in my trousers

time for those plastic notes to prove themselves

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6ee22e No.267485

Fuck

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001807 No.267486

>>267483

Don't you look like a tit now

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6ee22e No.267487

>>267482

What about those posh jelly fruit slices that came in aa fancy box

>free 50bag

Sweet, get shotting and make 70 off it

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6ee22e No.267488

>>267486

Made a right boob

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8dc4e3 No.267489

>>267466

No, I'm watching Eurovision.

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c9a21a No.267490

>>267487

fucking hated those pieces of shit

>50bag

most of it dun bin smoked by now mon. last of it prolly tonight. curse our unenterprising spirits

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6ee22e No.267491

>>267489

Faggot or actual lass confirmed

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c9a21a No.267492

>>267489

you faggot

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8dc4e3 No.267493

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6ee22e No.267494

>>267490

Reeereeee they're excellent

>unenterprising

If it hasn't been flipped at least once then you shouldn't consume it

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6ee22e No.267495

>>267493

Still hoping it's the latter, but it does appear to be the former

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44e9c1 No.267496

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6ee22e No.267497

>>267496

Reeeeee put a flag on you bumtoucher

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c9a21a No.267498

>>267494

fucking nasty things they were. hope I never see one again

>flipped

assuming I correct guessed what 'flip' means, that sounds like an immense effort tbh

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44e9c1 No.267499

File: 8e3a5c36ed5ddf6⋯.jpg (87.9 KB,334x334,1:1,8e3a5c36ed5ddf63d805b58689….jpg)

>getting riled up just because I don't use a flag

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6ee22e No.267500

>>267498

The orange slices are fuckibg lush, hold your tongue

>effort

Don't ever spend actual earned money on drugs lad

As biggie says

>don't get high on your own supply

flog it at a mark up and buy better persy gear

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6ee22e No.267501

>>267499

>not giving me a (you)

*crosses possible names off list*

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001807 No.267502

>>267500

>lush

maybe it's just because all the southerners I know are lasses, but I've never actually heard a lad say lush

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8dc4e3 No.267503

>>267495

don't bully

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6ee22e No.267505

>>267502

I've worked as far north as brum and lads on site all say lush

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8dc4e3 No.267506

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6ee22e No.267508

>>267503

I'm not a bully, you can be as gay as you like, provided I don't see, hear, or read about it

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