No.400714 [View All]
Driving an RV through the apocalypse edition
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_m2zGncgLjw
____________________________
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No.401026
>>401024
oh i assumed it was a girl name or something
>you don't need hormones to look good.
depends on whether or not you have gender dysphoria my dude
>>401025
well i get these periods where i try to remove people and leave groups and shut people off while wanting to talk to people but feeling too bottled up to do so
eh
add me on discord if you do i guess
i stopped movies for a long time but ended up watching a ton while i was at the crisis shelter
like before that i hadnt seen a movie in a year
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No.401027
>>401026
It's a feminine name so you're not wrong.
I have more different views on the trans issue. Uni doesn't help since that solidifies and gives a lot of research that backs up my views.
Sometimes stress bottles up for me and I either get really angry or really sad or a mixture of both. Music always helps though.
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No.401028
>>401024
>you don't need hormones to look good. Just find your cutest bits and highlight them.
i don't really have any of those, except perhaps hair, which doesn't help with my potato face and everything else.
> I fap a lot altho for different reasons. I use my brain a lot and think and try to make logical connections to rationaloze everything. Masturbation helps my brain reset.
happens. though masturbation makes me flirty and obnoxious, which leads to mistakes. i'd rather work on projects to keep myself and my mind busy.
see, that's the thing. i'm not really trans per se. i'm a trap at best. and people don't hate me because i'm trans, they hate me because i'm an obnoxious, moody piece of shit of a human being.
i'll see ya around.
do post and say hello, though.
i'm usuall around, but waiting for someone to say something.
>>401026
>well i get these periods
b-but only cis women get those
hahaha kill me
>well i get these periods where i try to remove people and leave groups and shut people off while wanting to talk to people but feeling too bottled up to do so
i get that. i'm still in that period.
i think i just realized that the best time of my life was being sluttyly anonymous, at the AGDG 2016 thread on /v/. i miss that so fucking much. getting drunk, shitposting with anons.
names were a mistake. you can't move on when you fuck something up, your mistakes are forever attached to your name.
it's not like i can go to /imouto/ or /animus/ and pretend to not be a mentally ill wreck, that's just what i'm known for.
>add me on discord if you do i guess
might, might not.
i honestly don't know yet.
>
i stopped movies for a long time but ended up watching a ton while i was at the crisis shelter
>like before that i hadnt seen a movie in a year
yeah, i think the last movie before A Clockwork Orange was Persona 3 the Movie 4, which was like autumn of last year.
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No.401029
>>401027
i kinda feel dumb for not realizing what your name meant, at least to some part.
i know it's Bulgarian and not Russian, but they are similar to some extent, and Stara is obviously similar to the Russian word for Old.
>I have more different views on the trans issue. Uni doesn't help since that solidifies and gives a lot of research that backs up my views.
you can share if you want, i don't think anyone will mind or be bothered, nothing wrong with discussions.
so are you cis or trans, then? guy or girl? if you don't mind sharing then.
>Music always helps though.
it's why i have $50 headphones and never take them off.
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No.401030
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No.401031
>>401028
eat shit commie son of a whore
i like names because i like making long term friendships
i've had more than my fair share of back and forward anon arguments
>i honestly don't know yet.
your choice
>yeah, i think the last movie before A Clockwork Orange was Persona 3 the Movie 4, which was like autumn of last year.
persona 3 has movies?
what
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No.401032
>>401028
Everyone have their good sides. Maybe I just believe too strongly in people though.
Oh and I guess it's fine. Guy (although I wish I wasn't). Very much bi or pan or whatever people wanna say about being attracted to other people. I'm fairly feminine and have a lot of feminine features including my voice so that confuses people.
I think you can view the trans process as a social process. After that one doctor showed how even gender can be seen as a symbol rather than a fact, things sort of went wild. But I think part of what creates a trans person is the environment and people. The diet of the household. The way you are treated and taught. All of these things are important since each person is a reflection of the different people around them.
Another way for trans people to become possible is if the person does not understand or replicate and legitimize gender and sex by their symbols. I feel like this is more my case since I had a period of a few years during my childhood where I didn't want to speak to anyone and just played games. This has distanced me a lot. A few other things happened to allow an even bigger distance but it's a long story.
I have the point of view of social constructs, no tumblrisms intended.
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No.401033
>>401030
Thanks
>>401031
I've heard the Persona movies are alright. You should give em a try.
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No.401034
>>401032
>social constructs
yeah but some transfolk felt like the opposite gender from an absurdly early age, ie 4 or 5 years old
i know i used to play with girl toys and whatnot as a kid, but my dysphoria only really started appearing around puberty
the explanation i've heard which i think is the most rational is that hormone imbalances in the womb fuck up your lymbic system so you register yourself as female
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No.401035
>>401034
Hormonal balance is annoying since it can change from and after birth. There's biological and social factors and they mix a lot. It'll probably take another decade worth of research to get solid evidence.
I've avoided trans communities so I'm not up to speed on the latest ideas and issues. Plus some people that go on hormones are justifying stereotypes which is really not fun.
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No.401036
>>401031
sorry, i couldn't resist.
>i like names because i like making long term friendships
i like that too, but i always fuck those up, with no exception.
>i've had more than my fair share of back and forward anon arguments
nothing wrong with arguments. the difference is, you can move on to another thread and no one will know what you said prior.
it's like admitting you support Trump, then going to talk about games and someone saying "OH THAT GUY IS A BIGOT NAZI YOU SHOULDN'T CARE ABOUT HIS OPINION ON GAMES"
>persona 3 has movies?
four of them.
pretty good, too. amazing ost.
http://megamitensei.wikia.com/wiki/Persona_3_The_Movie
>Oh and I guess it's fine. Guy (although I wish I wasn't). Very much bi or pan or whatever people wanna say about being attracted to other people. I'm fairly feminine and have a lot of feminine features including my voice so that confuses people.
ahh, cute. trap here, bi, i suppose.
it's an interesting view, i suppose. i'm not quite sure how to explain what i'm like, but i suppose i did spend most of my childhood/teenage days alone, so it's not a huge stretch.
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No.401037
>>401035
>I've avoided trans communities
i can see this as a good idea
the end game is obviously to just stealth as a biogirl
i was super /pol/ before i started to tran so i had really obnoxious gender stereotypes when i first started
i'm better now tho
>>401036
i'm getting better with them
i think you should distance yourself from chan-type sites
these aren't that good for your ability to form lasting friendships
>it's like admitting you support Trump, then going to talk about games and someone saying "OH THAT GUY IS A BIGOT NAZI YOU SHOULDN'T CARE ABOUT HIS OPINION ON GAMES"
yeah but it's annoying af
you just have pointless argument after pointless argument
it gets really old
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No.401038
>>401037
>i think you should distance yourself from chan-type sites
>these aren't that good for your ability to form lasting friendships
i'd say that i should instead distance myself from long lasting relationships and spend more time as anon if anything. was the best time of my life when i did.
all the stress and mistakes happened when i started namefagging.
i mean, beautiful thing about being anon, you can just quit an argument and no one will say a thing. if you quit one while namefagging, it will be brought up next time you talk to that person.
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No.401039
>>401037
People here don't browse imageboards and we have literal fascists in our government. Depending on where you live, people might even be quite open. I live in a commie style industrial city that's very much fascist oriented but people are surprisingly accepting to the point where I've heard some tough guys talk about how they'd "nut a shemale as long as she has a nice ass and tits". I live in a really weird place.
>>401038
Long distance is rough. Plus slutyness is an awful curse. I agree as well. 8chan has all sorts of people. For better or for worse, I'm stuck here.
Wew, I remember saying I'd sleep an hour ago.
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No.401040
>>401039
>Long distance is rough.
though admittedly i've had more luck with those.
doesn't mean much either way, however.
see you around, man. don't be a stranger.
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No.401041
sorry i got distracted trying to watch a movie w/ a friend that wouldn''t work
>>401038
that's probably because you were still acting like an anon while namefagging
there's different standards to it tbh
going anon is way to socialize while doing nothing to abate loneliness
>>401039
>I've heard some tough guys talk about how they'd "nut a shemale as long as she has a nice ass and tits"
urgh that's disgusting
i hate chasers tbqh
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No.401042
>>401041
>that's probably because you were still acting like an anon while namefagging
i would not say that, actually. i act very differently. primarily, actively trying to refrain from hurting people in any real way. basically, i act nice.
with anon, i don't have to pretend.
>going anon is way to socialize while doing nothing to abate loneliness
going anon is a way to socialize that also allows you to make mistakes while doing so.
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No.401043
>>401042
>i act very differently. primarily, actively trying to refrain from hurting people in any real way. basically, i act nice.
that's probably good for you
you had a few episodes which seemed very stereotypically 4chan-y
>going anon is a way to socialize that also allows you to make mistakes while doing so.
it's like the basest form of socialization ever
actual socialization abates loneliness because you have meaningful connections between people
with anonposting you get the act of socialization and the momentary pleasure with none of the lasting aftereffects
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No.401044
>>401043
>that's probably good for you
pretending to be something i'm not is good for me?
that's a very normie attitude towards human relations to have.
>with anonposting you get the act of socialization and the momentary pleasure with none of the lasting aftereffects
the lasting after effects of meaningful relationships? you mean heartbreak, pain, tears and mental breakdowns?
none of the good things about friendships ever last. ever.
at least with anon, i'm not expecting that.
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No.401045
>>401044
>pretending to be something i'm not is good for me?
a lot of personality is learned behavior
ie how you're not the same person now that you were ten years ago
clinging to a divine self of 'true self' is just an excuse for not working on improving your personality
>none of the good things about friendships ever last. ever.
fam this is a personal issue more than anything else
i've had active friendships that have lasted 6-8+ years
unfortunately i had to prune a lot of them because they were dudebros who would never accept me as female and i don't want to have to deal with that
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No.401046
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No.401047
>>401045
>clinging to a divine self of 'true self' is just an excuse for not working on improving your personality
i wouldn't consider being nice to be a good thing, or an improvement of any sort. it's me appeasing people because they'll leave me otherwise. it's me doing something for others' approval, not because i actually want to be like that.
>fam this is a personal issue more than anything else
of course it is.
it's a personal issue that will never go away. it's been that way for all my life, and it ain't going away any time soon.
i've met all sorts of people, treated them all sorts of ways.
it always ends the same.
>unfortunately i had to prune a lot of them because they were dudebros who would never accept me as female and i don't want to have to deal with that
my longest actual friendships were a few years, and even in those, i was a third wheel at best.
honestly? i'm not interesting. i'm not fun. no one wants me around.
and i think i'm fine with that.
i got used to having friends over the past year.
i can get used to being alone as well.
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No.401048
>>401047
it's your life and you can do what you want but I'd argue clinging to anonposting to avoid developing actual friendships is and will result in emotional retardation
4chan veterans aren't often renowned for emotional maturity, and for good reason
i had a lot of these problems before, esp when 4chan / 8ch were my only social life, but interacting with actual decent people (mostly trantrans) helped me improve my behavior a lot
and i had a few breakdowns where i tried to cut people off but i've even been trying to go against my discomfort and reestablish connections when i don't want to
>honestly? i'm not interesting. i'm not fun. no one wants me around.
you can be both when you try to be
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No.401049
>>401048
>it's your life and you can do what you want but I'd argue clinging to anonposting to avoid developing actual friendships is and will result in emotional retardation
GOOD. HOLY SHIT THAT'S ALL I'VE WANTED ALL MY FUCKING LIFE.
Dude, if there was a way to abandon emotions right now, I'd take it. I'd trade any sense of joy I may have for the possibility to give up all the despair and depression in my life.
>but interacting with actual decent people (mostly trantrans) helped me improve my behavior a lot
find me a decent person out there.
find one.
i spent a year with someone i thought was decent. he was a selfish prick at the end of the day, as are all people.
>but i've even been trying to go against my discomfort and reestablish connections when i don't want to
i did that too, actually, not too long ago, with a small namefag board.
it was a mistake.
>you can be both when you try to be
no. to be either of those, i'd need to have interests identical to normies. i'd need to play overwatch, and be ready to play whenever they want me to.
i find shit like particle system decay interesting. shit like printing character strings. things that no one understands.
when i say i make games, initially, they're intrigued. when i talk about it, people are lost and stop giving a shit. as for the fun, again, my interests would have to align with normie interests for that to be the case, which they don't.
i literally have to force myself to like something i don't.
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No.401050
>>401049
>GOOD. HOLY SHIT THAT'S ALL I'VE WANTED ALL MY FUCKING LIFE.
you want to not need emotional support, but what you're going to get is the desire for emotional support but too much social retardation to be able to get it
>find me a decent person out there.
i'd say you can start with people not violently awful, eg not typical 4chan / 8ch anons
you don't know how to interact with people and you're being overly cynical to defend it
i told a guy i barely even talk to (who i actually met on 8ch) about the shit i'd gone through and he was so concerned he looked up hawaiian support groups and got me hooked up with a local one, through which i may actually now have housing
a while back i mentioned saving up for a 3DS and a girl i'd known for a year decided to send me hers, free of charge (though i gave her some money back bc i'm not an ass)
when (most) people rely on you for emotional support (and vice versa), they learn to care. that's how things go. if you surround yourself entirely with emotionally retarded /pol/posters, maybe you're not going to get that.
>no. to be either of those, i'd need to have interests identical to normies.
hahahahahahaha no
i have barely anything in common with the people i talk to, but we make do
they talk about their stuff sometimes, i talk about my stuff, we talk to eachother about it, whatever
maybe we have some shared things we can talk about like transitioning but for the most part people i talk to share -maybe- one or two interests with me
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No.401051
April 10, 2017
https://mega.nz/#!m8p3BQpA!bfCfop4S6ESk9j4vBtt7gCFg-vYF0TJXJkFZmRwjEHA
Translated
(C87) [Kinokonabe Hinanjo (Maitake)] Nisekano (Puella Magi Madoka Magica) [English] [NEOZEED]
Now Loading…! ch04 [Sexy Akiba Detectives] (English)
[Doki] Goblin Is Very Strong - Chapter 01
[Idolatrymaster] A Certain Conversation On A Certain Day
Untranslated
[Y-NRG SYSTEM]課題、シちゃいました♪ (あんハピ)
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No.401052
Waking up in the morning is painful.
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No.401053
>>401052
Waking up is painful.*
ftfy
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No.401054
>>401053
On the plus side, I'm only somewhat sleepy. Now to catch my train.
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No.401055
>>401054
Seems kind of tough to catch. They're pretty fast and heavy. Good luck though.
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No.401056
>>401055
Us Eastern Europeans are ultra meatheads so we catch and lift trains daily as a hobby, don't worry anon.
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No.401057
>>401056
Why haven't you taken over yet?
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No.401058
>>401057
have you seen slavic suicide rates, mate?
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No.401059
>>401058
Such depressing details. I'd rather not look into them.
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No.401060
>>401059
t. personal experience.
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No.401061
>>401060
The last personal experience I want.
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No.401062
>>401061
i never said i wanted it, i just have it.
i'd do anything to trade that crap away, but it's not something you can just live down, or something that goes away like that.
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No.401063
>>401062
I wouldn't want to imagine such a thing. I'd think too had about it.
And here I am listening to depressing music.
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No.401064
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>401063
aww, sorry.
depressing music?
try this instead.
can't post the music i actually really like because i'm pretending to be dead and people might find me
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No.401065
>>401064
I can't stop listening though. It's nice.
Finding you based just on music? Almost sounds too unique of a taste if that's the case.
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No.401066
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>401065
share some, man.
i just share those few songs way too often.
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No.401067
>Yoko Shimomura
That must have hit deep for her to recreate it.
Hmmm, fair enough. I could probably make some connections.
And here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_lyQ-OCIYs
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No.401068
Wait, might have read this video wrong.
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No.401069
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>401067
it's not this place specifically, it's to avoid any casual observers from /otherboards/ popping by here. i know of a few.
whacha up to, anyhows?
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No.401070
>>401069
Hmmm, maybe those viewers should join us. Fucking losers.
Just being a lazy shit tonight. Been up for quite some time. Binge studied for a test yesterday.
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No.401071
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>401070
>tonight
it's like 5 am for you, man.
also i'm not sure if they're here now, but they might be. let's just say, i'm paranoid
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No.401072
>>401071
Tonight is tonight until I fall asleep! Unless it's really early. I guess 5am is closing in on that.
I've had my own really, so I don't blame you.
If only we could ban lurkers somehow.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0pcH8G8pG4
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No.401073
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>401072
ehh, my sleep schedule isn't ideal either. though i woke up pretty early today.
ahh. if anyone asks, just pretend I'm dead, okay?
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No.401075
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No.401078
>>401073
My sleep schedule is always fucked. It never matters.
Sure. But might want to change some habits, or at least be aware of them just to make sure.
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