HookTube embed. Click on thumbnail to play. No.17406
Are you ready for maximum cringe as Disney violates Star Wars to the extreme in their sequel to a movie that was originally about video games? Are you ready for heinous designs? Leia as a member of the Disney Princess line? C3PO as the princess aide? And fucking nu-troopers fighting alongside Muppets?! FUCKING END THE PAIN!
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No.17408
>>17406
Holy fuck, why does every character look so ugly?
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No.17410
I honestly hope this is so bad it backfires for Disney. Sadly, dumb little girls and boys will eat this shit up.
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No.17411
Can someone please just nuke Hollywood and everything slightly feminist already.
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No.17412
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No.17413
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No.17416
>>17412
>showing off your slaves
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No.17419
>>17413
Now I want to die as well. What a cavalcade of modern memes, each more cancerous than the last.
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No.17423
"We have arrived, and it is now that we perform our charge.
In fealty to the God-Emperor (our undying Lord) and by the grace of the Golden Throne, I declare Exterminatus upon the Imperial world of Typhon Primaris.
I hereby sign the death warrant of an entire world and consign a million souls to oblivion.
May Imperial Justice account in all balance.
The Emperor Protects."
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No.17430
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No.17435
>>17413
>the internet is "beautiful" and the #1 site is "Oh My Disney"
>all that shameless product placement and shilling for google and amazon
>using daft punk for this
>the little ugly Silvermann girl sleeps with the big guy
Are they actually fucking to boot?
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No.17441
Oh yes sweetie, /soywars/ btfo!
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No.17443
>>17435
>Are they actually fucking to boot?
Aren't they siblings?
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No.17444
>>17443
No they're not. Ralph and her are from two completely different games. They never even met until midway through the movie.
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No.17445
>>17444
Ah, okay. Haven't watched it, just thought I heard him say "little sister" in the webm.
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No.17504
>>17423
Why say all that when you could just be exterminating? Call in the Daleks, they get to the point.
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No.17506
This is somewhat disappointing. I actually kind of liked the first one.
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No.17523
>>17406
<start churning butter and put on your jerk shoes!
>make a joke about why the movie should be called "wrecks the internet" despite it not clarifying anything
>replace video game characters with shameless product placement for major companies with Google, Facebook, Amazon and other such bullshit
>portray the internet as a beautiful utopia instead of a chaotic shitfest
>have a search engine character despite google already being a thing in the film
>only site it can look up is Disney shit when asked for an "intense" webstie
>over-glorifying their shitty blog site to make it look like some kind of amusement park despite it not even having a decent main page and generally being dull and ugly as shit http://archive.is/SLfL2
>Disney just used the movie to advertise the blog to drum up views for it since no one was visiting
>Twitter is about sharing funny cat videos
>whole movie is literally just Disney trying to improve their image with the masses and show everyone how "cool" they are
>for some reason everything in the internet is alive including Disney characters despite that they should only exist as lifeless pictures since according to the logic of the first film you need to have sprites or 3D models to be a living thing, otherwise you're just a being of pure electrical energy like the surge protector
<Do people assume all your problems got solved because a big strong man showed up?
<Do people assume
That's a fucking fact for more than half of these bitches. Mulan isn't even a princess and she was the one who saved her guy's ass to boot. Frozen's dyke princess didn't even have a man to protect her, her's was the fucking villain.
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No.17544
>>17406
I don't know what it is, but something about this trailer makes me really, really angry.
>Leia as a member of the Disney Princess line?
My rage will transcend the fury of a thousand burning suns if they do that.
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No.17551
>>17544
>My rage will transcend the fury of a thousand burning suns if they do that.
This movie is one giant normie meme already, and this kind of shit (le female Thor is now a Disney Princess XD, anyone remember that?) is the gold standard of such.
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No.17566
>>17506
>>liking anything where Sarah Silverman plays a child to pass on her impropriety to the girls watching the movie
You only "like" it because its usually played before Star Wars: Rebels and its considerably better than that movie. Or that's why I liked Wreck it Ralph once upon a time when Disney's control of Star Wars had just begun.
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No.17569
>>17566
That's…a rather unique circumstance, dubsman. I liked it because it was funny, and the concept seemed new.
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No.17643
>>17506
The first one seemed like a genuine homage to video games. This one looks shallow and superficial
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No.17644
>>17435
>the internet is "beautiful" and the #1 site is "Oh My Disney"
The yids want to be considered gods on earth.
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No.17720
Wreck-It Ralph
>Creators came up with their own retro arcade cabinet game for the film (I played it at Disneyland)
>clearly based on old videya, effectively being a reverse-Rampage
>film is pretty clearly thought out and the OC designs were all based on old games as well
>Overall the world is grounded and consistent, keeping within its own rules.
>Game cameos feel natural and also include games that are no longer being sold (i.e. Q-bert) so you don't feel like you're being advertised to for anything.
>There are no game titles being shoved in your face like cawadooty blacked ops 69 with cuckshed preorder available at gamestop
>Setting is used for story, not spectacle
>Themes about accepting and adapting to life's difficulties that are universal.
Ralph II:
>Creators did no research, basing it on their day to day interactions with chrome or whatever shit botnet browser they use every day
>Based on the sanitized normienet of the 10 websites every pleb uses, making the setting too well trod to be interesting
>Everything is a painful advertisement for big websites, with in-your-face billboards. No references to older or more obscure sites to feel more rounded.
>Painful disney shilling
>Setting breaks its own rules, where non-graphics now appear as graphics
>Setting is now used for spectacle, and probably not story
>feminist themed joke, inaccessible to the 90% of the audience that aren't millennial cat ladies
Painful, cringy advertisements give me a literal allergic reaction. When I watch them my eyes water the same way they do when I'm around certain types of plant pollen. I had to shut off the trailer for this movie to keep myself from tearing up so bad. Also, is it me or does Silverman's voice sound even more grating than the previous movie?
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No.17727
>>17720
I bet you the Disney suits messed with this. Before the sequel was announced, I'd heard the guys behind the first movie wanted to do a sequel about Felix meeting his dad. I'm going to assume they threw that out and shoved this Emoji Movie bullshit onto them so they could shill their stupid new website.
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No.17739
>>17720
The first one doesn't sound so bad, which surprises me given Silverman's involvement.
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No.17740
>>17739
I found it to be enjoyable, and I wouldnt have any qualms about letting my kids watch itif I had kids
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No.17746
>>17739
Silverman is actually the only truly bad thing about the first one. And it gets worse when you realize her character is made to resemble her a bit (even her hair color is just made the same as Silverman's despite not following the same colorful aesthetic of the game she originates from). Which is why I prefer to watch the Japanese version of the film in which she actually sounds like a little girl (with good acting) and has better characterization. The first one is actually a pretty fun little film to enjoy and it doesn't rely to heavily on forced cameos and references since the second half of the movie takes place in an entirely original game setting based on Candyland that focuses solely on the four main characters. Q-Bert is pretty much the only vidya character the movie who plays a consistent but minor role in the plot.
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No.17813
>>17727
Can't have fatherly characters in modern kids movies unless:
>they are the bad guy
>they are comic relief and constantly fuck up
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No.17845
I made it over halfway in before I closed out. this is just terrible.
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No.17864
>>17739
It really wasn't. Things were actually funny when they were meant to be, likewise cute, and likewise heartwrenching.I guess I didn't mind Silvermann, but that was before I had any idea of her politics.
This new one appears to miss the point entirely. Could have been fun to have some Mafia-pastiche Anons running a DDOS "hold-up" on one of the big sites.
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No.17937
>>17727
That actually sounds interesting, if I remember correctly the canon of the game Felix and Ralph are from, Felix's dad is dead. It's a shame this sequel is DOA.
>>17739
All she does is voice the one character, it's not like she had a hand in writing it. Not that I blame you for wanting to avoid it because of her involvement.
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No.17945
>>17937
>All she does is voice the one character, it's not like she had a hand in writing it. Not that I blame you for wanting to avoid it because of her involvement.
I'm aware that actors are not usually writers, I just see casting as something of a miner's canary. If you knew nothing about a film besides that Benedict Cumberpatch played the leading role, would that not give you certain expectations about his character? Even though Cumberpatch has nothing to do with the script, the writer and casting director know who Cumberpatch is and what he implies, and their decisions will be influenced by that knowledge. Likewise, the people in charge of Ralph know what people will think when they see Silverman in the credits, and are implying either that they want that reaction, or the reaction isn't important to them.
TL;DR quick judgements are sometimes wrong but Silverman's name is dripping with >implications.
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No.17964
>>17406
Jewesses always sound like harpies. Sarah Silverman should die soon.
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No.17965
>>17406
>snapchat
Started off as something you'd sext with, right? Ah, Yidsney.
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No.17967
>>17506
I thought the idea was stupid. In fact, if I was older when Toy Story came out, I probably would have thought the same. I dunno.
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No.17969
>>17864
>politics
Forget that. She's just a disgusting person.
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No.17970
>>17945
What's wrong with Cumberbatch?
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No.17973
>>17970
Nothing wrong with him (at least as far as acting ability is concerned), I just thought he was a good example of this "canary" effect thanks to his typecasting–if Cumberpatch is the lead you can expect the character he plays to be hyper-intelligent and egotistical, even though Cumberpatch doesn't write the script or the characters.
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No.17996
>>17969
This is your brain on secular Judaism.
>Captcha says:oyinex
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No.17999
>>17945
I still don't understand how anyone can find Vanollope adorable considering Silverman's awful grating voice. And that's counting the crazy boner /co/ and /v/ had for this dreadful design. Its only made worse by the fact that so many other dubbed versions of the film in other languages try too hard to imitate her awful voice. And then her design is dull as shit and doesn't match up with her own game of origin since you can clearly tell her face and hair were modeled after Silverman's, much like Ralph's face and hair was somewhat modeled after his VA. Its like Disney is afraid to come up with original designs for their non-princess movies so they can claim some of that celebrity cameo dosh. Back in their older films, they would even use regular voice actors in leading roles, like Jonathan Freeman as Jafar, Kevin Michael Richardson as the main whale-thing villain in Lilo and Stitch and Jim Cummings in a lot of films. Now everything has to be voiced by a popular celebrity of week regardless if they have any voice acting talent.
>>17969
Casuals actually used to think she was hot and an offensive sex icon until she did a nude scene in a movie. That pretty much killed any majority interest in her weird body. And any admirers she had for her "ultra offensive" humor lost interest after she made some tweets defending muslims if I recall.
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No.18012
>>17996
No, that's Judaism. Jews are able to flip around like that—their religion's laws work more like a law book really.
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No.18013
>>17999
I never understood that. I hated everything about her.
Why sage? It's relevant, no?Also, why must the BO put that text? It's incredibly obnoxious.
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No.18019
>>18013
What text? You mean that big red "sage"? If so I agree. Its too gaudy, clashes with the color scheme and draws too much attention.
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No.18023
>>18019
Yes. It's an option in the board's settings. I'm sure if anyone knows javascript it should be really easy to fix.
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No.18034
>>18012
>pic
You, uh, you do realize that the Talmud has a lot of dialects that are supposed to teach a point at the end? All of those horrible "kill and rape the gentile whilst I stroke my nose with gold coins myeh heh heh heh he!" passages are from a rhetorical wise ass playing Devil's Advocate (where they aren't outright forgeries). They are coupled with a rebuttal from another rabbi. The purpose is to train the reader how to talk through this stuff in order to get elitists who don't know how to live in diaspora to STFU, and it's not a text that was designed to be user-friendly. The Koran is probably the only more obscure and confusing Abrahamic text.
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No.18035
>>18034
10/10 fucking post, it was so subtle I was about to post pic related unironically.
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No.18099
This is basically just the Emoji movie with Disney characters. I thought the first movie already shit the bed by turning it from a Wreck it Ralph movie to a Sarah Silverman Disney Princess movie, where they spent the rest of the time in Penelope's lame world and focusing on her.
This new movie though, is just pure cringe all around.
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No.18105
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play. >>18099
This essentially. The first film was far more fun and engaging for the first half, but the Sugar Rush bullshit just felt so uninteresting and less video-game centric. They pretty much had little to no game references while in not-Candyland which were instead replaced by product placement for different brands of candies and other sweets.
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