/ausneets/ - Aus NEETs

Cunt muffin.

Suck on my ass hairs you cunts.

Gippsland

GUCCI GANG GUCCI GANG GUCCI GANG GUCCI GANG GUCCI GANG GUCCI GANG GUCCI GANG GUCCI GANG GUCCI GANG GUCCI GANG GUCCI GANG GUCCI GANG

Gook Hill

I want a cute redhead girl to give me a rimjob.

neet gang pepe on my wrist

failed the bum rash

>>223114

Yeah, I've pretty much forgotten how to talk to wahmens, haven't talked to one in that long.

>>223105

I bet you don't even have any.

>>223123

There is an art to it. I don't think I could anymore and I have the misso. I talk to her the same as I talk to everyone.

>>223125

Yeah, there is, even if you aren't going into all the PUA type of shit, there still is.

I'm on the spectrum I don't know to communicate with women

>>223126

>PUA type of shit,

What's that?

>>223128

Pick up artist, some of the research and stuff that they draw upon is legit, but most of the rest of it is pretty fucking silly if you ask me.

>>223129

Pick women up and bring them to the dumpster

>>223131

What ever floats your boat NK

>>223129

I don't think it's something that can be taught.

>>223133

Yeah, it's more of a trial and error type of thing, I mean you can have rough guidelines but it really is one of those things that is up to the individual.

I think that I'll call it a day. Night Night NEETs.

>>223129

On the topic of PUAs

I woke up and looked at the clock. I expected it to say 5am but it was only 1:30. I still got up because the thoughts had started so I knew I wouldn't be able to get back to sleep. I will try again in a couple of hours.

>>223134

Good night my friend. You had another prolific night. Lots of very good posts.

>>223141

Isn't that guy the junior executive legbreaker ?

>>223145

Good morning Argie. I never give money to beggars.

Time to go back to bed.

>>223146

>>223148

Good morning to you, by the way.

>>223149

Morning Argie.

Morning all.

>>222923

Thank you for reconsidering.

>>223056

That is a category D weapon. He most likely is employed by a primary producer. The weapon would be licensed to the business, not to an individual.

>>223149

I'm considering moving to Argentina.

Morning NEETs.

Morning. Woke up at 3 and was awake for ages. Tired now.

Monash NEET I also took seroquel, 75mg. Still had a broken sleep. I wanna get off this ride.

Morning NEETs.

Morning NEETS.

SPACE TRUCK, FOUR ON THE FLOOR

FORTIFIED WITH THE LIQUOR STORE

Morning NEETs.

>>223145

What a prick.

>>223148

Nice pics.

I put in work

And watch my status escalate

I had a dream last night that I met Possum. Although when I got there he was living in a caravan and was a stoner, which at first I thought was cool. He was playing an xbox, like the original one. I had a bong and it was too strong and I started getting all paranoid and sweaty so I took off all my clothes except my undies. I could see my dad outside walking towards the caravan and I started panicking and Possum was telling me to calm down and was holding me by the shoulders, then my dad walked in. So I'm there, stoned, with no clothes on in some random guys caravan. He didn't seem surprised. I said hi and he could tell I was stoned but didn't care.

Then I woke up.

I'm sure there's a deeper meaning.

>>223159

That blade is probably less effective than a shorter, properly sharpened straight blade.

>>223164

Effective at what?

>>223165

Cutting celery.

I had a shower and washed my tattoo.

>>223168

I was thinking about that in the shower as well.

Salad farts are something chronic.

They don't stink all that much but there's a lot of gas.

Rape morning

Ejaculating aboriginal penis

Think my brain is degenerating because I don't socialise.

>>223174

I've been a shut-in NEET for the past 3 and a half years.

>>223163

If it was real life your undies would have come off too.

>>223166

Hot

>>223171

Have a nice day. See you when you get back.

>>223176

> See you when you get back

I thought you had his entire day mapped by spy cameras though

>>223154

I had a broken sleep as well. The seroquel leaves me feeling groggy.

22 degrees today in Shitbourne, got a call back from the place I went for an interview to on Friday, they're hiring me and want me to start next Monday, might go buy something from Dan to celebrate this occasion.

>>223179

I dont think thats a Dog m8

>>223180

Well done mate, enjoy your celebration

>>223180

Congratulations mate. Excellent.

>>223180

Good to hear.

>>223181

The bloke on gumtree assured me it's a dog.

>>223180

Good onya m8.

Is it a job you want or just a job ?

>>223185

Did he say what breed it was? it does have that greyhound look to me

>>223180

Nice one. What kinda job? You have to give at least a brief description to join the wagie club

Really dark poo, the colour is basically black and the smell is appropriate

>>223187

He told me it was a fox terrier.

>>223182

>>223183

>>223186

>>223188

Thanks NEETs, it's a trainee position at window tinting place, not ideal, but it pays well and I might as well give it a shot.

>>223192

I guess you just forgot >>223184 when you were building your list.

>>223192

Sounds good mate. Good luck.

>>223176

But what is the deeper meaning?

>>223196

You're a bit gay and Possum isn't all he seems.

>>223180

Congrats mate, very good work

>>223196

You should ask your guru.

>>223200

I will tonight.

I am in from the power rack and pitching session. The neighbour saw me pitching. He didn't say anything. I just ignored him.

I wish I had more privacy. The dogs next door have been barking every time they see me. Makes me feel very exposed. Like an alarm goes off every time I go into the yard.

>>223202

Bark back at them.

They'll either freak out and shut up or your neighbour will think you're crazy and keep them inside in case you eat them.

>>223202

> just ignored him.

Good lad

I asked the new girl what support workers' impression of me is out in the field. She said both participants and support workers prefer talking to me when they call.

Good feels.

She was a support worker btw

unna

>>223202

you should ask him if he wants to play baseball with you

>>223192

Make sure not to make the tint too dark, I wanna be able to see people changing through their windows at night

>>223193

what did he mean by this

>>223193

Spoken like a true boong

>>223179

>>223181

>tfw you ask for DogNEET and get Possum instead

>>223211

I don't see an UNNA or a WOIGHT CAHNT so I think its just a garden variety bogan

Found this gem from when the onion was actually funny. Really makes me think about how pathetic most modern "comedy" is.

>>223215

>Gay Texas

lol

>>223205

That is good news mate. You are doing a great job.

>>223212

Lol

I have had way too much caffeine since lunch and I have having trouble breathing automatically

Rather uncomfortable, I'm also extremely tired from waking up at 3:30 from a slightly hungover nightmare

fuck

poo

bum bum

Palindrome at >>223322

>>223221

Thank you Autistic neet

>>223222

a bit ableist to be honest

>>223225

You need to get your mental illnesses properly diagnosed by a psychiatrist and then get DSP.

>>223217

Thanks, I try.

Hows gf2019 going NEETs

I haven't even talked to a girl that isn't a family member this year

>>223226

He doesn't really need to do that if he has a mother that is lazy and is already on welfare

Source: me

Granted though as soon as my mother dies I'm literally fucked and there is nowhere for me to go. Suicide is unironically my only way out at that point

>>223225

cats die, then ur left with noone,living alone and hiding from everyone is not a fun way to live, and do you really want to deal with cenno for the rest of your life?

>>223231

my cat died just at the end of last year, and now you just made me sad.

apologise. now.

Sleepy wanks

Went to the gym this morning.

Went to work.

Came home.

Did some banjer practice.

Spaggets and meatballs almost ready.

Then off to lesson.

Then home to do a poo.

Then do another poo on here.

Then go to bed.

>>223234

How or why did you leave work so early

>>223235

I went to work at 6:30. An 8 hour work days means I walk out at 2.30.

>>223234

Changed the order a bit. Doing a rather violent poo right now.

>>223113

Gook afternoon.

>>223236

Very nice. The best work hours.

Uncomfortably tired

>>223241

have a wank

>>223180

Congratulations.

>>223241

have you tried applying outside of your area

unironically got me the job

>Why do I need a cert 4 in hospo to wash dishes

You don't, who ever is asking for that is full of shit especially when most Apprentice chefs go through Cert 3

>>223239

The dumb dumbs put in the EBA that core office hours are 6am - 6pm. So basically provided I do 7.6 hours somewhere in that window they can't do anything to me.

>>223189

Too many bulking agents?

>>223241

Adopt an Indian sounding name and just put whatever you think you might like doing on your resume. You'll get a shitload of interviews.

>>223237

The poo was so violent I actually stripped off and checked my back and legs in the mirror to make sure I hadn't sprayed poo on them.

Mischievous wank.

>>223241

What minimum wage jobs have you applied for?

I won't accept your complaining until you've signed up to several recruitment agencies for casual warehousing jobs. Until then you're just a layabout who only wants an 'acceptable' minumum wage job like waiting

>>223250

Are there neets who would actually prefer waiting to warehousing work? The former involves a lot more social interaction with customers, something I could do without.

>>223251

I'd have thought waiting was the last think you guys wanted. A good portion of customers are rude cunts.

>>223251

>>223252

Chef NEET here, kinda wish I was a humble dishie, they get the good life

>>223253

If you're the chef aren't you head of the totem pole?

>>223254

Yeah, you get to personally spit in every meal.

>>223255

You can also chuck knives and boiling water at kitchenhands.

>>223254

well I'm an apprentice, and anyways in the kitchen it goes Apprentice (me), Casual Chefs, Full Time Chefs, Sous Chefs, Head Chef then Exec Chef

>>223256

>You can also chuck knives and boiling water at Aprentices

ftfy

>>223257

Exec Chef eats what he cooks. And what the other chefs cook.

>>223259

Our Exec Chef is ironically the leanest and healthiest of all our chefs

Chicken subs with turkish bread for dinner.

What are you guys having? Anyone on the piss?

>>223179

Is that a quoll? They are bigger than I thought.

>>223261

>What are you guys having?

I don't know, I haven't asked mum yet

>>223262

Its a certain semite loving board owner

>>223265

Then you wonder why we drink

>>223224

When is your interview?

NEETs getting jobs and interviews

Where did all this inspiration come from?

Is 2019 year of the NEET?

The Wicked Wings are calling my name again.

>>223225

Hurry up or >>223241 awaits.

>>223269

Lets be honest I'm pretty sure most of us have jobs, the only thing is that none of us have kids, at best Monk got a bitch pregnant but she'd probably abort

>>223234

What time do you normally have tea?

>>223273

Is that permission?

>>223272

I've never had a job

>>223261

Chicken alfredo.

>>223264

I don't think so.

>>223276

thats why your an unnamed NEET

>>223278

But it is a possum

>>223267

It was today I didnt go because im a fucking dumbass

>>223280

I don't think so.

>>223283

But its a possum

>>223286

It's a spotted quoll.

>>223269

The Decade of the Wagie is almost upon us

>>223285

Gurus are just fart sniffing degenerates compared to contemporary philosophers.

>>223289

>Not labling the video as

<Meanwhile in the NEET Commune

>>223289

Penis trick man does not look pleased about his job

>>223287

The guy on gumtree has stopped answering my calls.

>>223274

4.30pm

>>223184

>>223194

I did, thank you nonetheless

>>223199

>>223243

Thanks

>>223209

I'll see what I can do pervNEET

>>223229

>I haven't even talked to a girl that isn't a family member this year

Same

>>223281

You silly boy

>>223293

You are very regimented. I like that. I wish I was too.

>>223289

>tfw cant do tricks with my penis

>>223292

I think you have been had mate

>>223289

Once you can do that I will take your criticisms seriously.

How many wicked wings did you get?

>14.90% p.a.

>Calculated daily on the money you use and charged monthly.

What does this mean re overdraft?

>>223301

You owe 114.90 on a 100 overdraw

>>223229

I haven't talked to a female reletive all year

>>223302

What does 'calculated daily' mean, it just updates daily?

>>223287

Quollas live up trees and eat gum leaves, right?

>>223304

Yes. The rate is only marginally better than a credit card, so don’t fucking use it.

>>223303

I talked to one today, she told me to have a good one after she handed me my change at Dan's

>>223306

I won't, but there's 15 bucks in my account till payday.

Not that I can even go into a branch during the day anyway.

>>223305

no, birds do that mate

>>223307

kek

>>223309

The one I took on a date said she was bored and just wanted to be friends.

This should've always been sung by a man.

>>223308

As long as you put it back on payday, you should be fine this one time.

Thumb and walk and wait.

Everyone fucking disappears around this time of night.

Bunch of normies probably watching tv with their family

>>223315

I am here to encourage you to go to Dan's.

>>223315

We have our communal wank at this time

>>223315

na, just been at pol reading about the rothschild email leak

>>223319

You know the week starts on Sunday, right?

>>223319

Looks like two different poos, did you keep it in from yesterday?

>>223322

Which neet is this? I thought I was the only seroquel neet

>>223321

Nah I cheated and found some poo on the sidewalk and stuffed it up my bum

>>223323

It helps me sleep

>>223324

I knew it!

>>223323

It's a good date rape drug

>>223328

Very sensual bumhole lips

There is a fashion shop in my city that is openly promoting race mixing. WTF is this shit.

$2 in my account till Monday.

Looks like a lot of rice this week I guess, hope I have enough fuel.

>>223330

>fashion shop

Is that different to a normal clothing store?

And Levis has rainbow flags for their logo now.

And there was a fucking tranny in the club I went to on the weekend.

>>223332

More trendy than normal.

>>223333

Did she look your way?

>>223335

It followed me around the club.

>>223337

Did it happen to mention chainsaws or deer?

>>223338

This is serious. But I didn't talk to it.

>>223339

It probably remembers all the shit you said a while back m8

>>223340

I ain't said shit to no tranny. I avoid them and faggots like the plague.

>>223341

What a strange feel

>>223322

Not a bad post for the digits.

I'm over it. It's been almost four years since the war started for me. Most of the normies have no idea that there even is a war because they are living in Facebook fantasy land.

>tfw will never have the weird feel of a tranny following me around

Back from my banjer lesson.

Enjoying a longneck now.

She was actually pleased with me this week.

>>223346

I'm sure you could arrange that online

>>223347

What are your thoughts on the instrument known as the mandolin?

>>223347

does she hit your hands with a cane when you make a mistake

>>223349

I have no strong thoughts on the instrument. I have never really listened to it as a solo instrument, only in bluegrass, so I could be wrong here, but it doesn't seem to resonate very long or loudly so they have to play it vigorously to get any sound out of it.

>>223350

I wish.

>>223342

Oh, I thought you sent an email to the club president about a tranny and ranted at the club when they let it in the first palce?

>>223354

"… played it 'til my fingers bled… it was the summer of 69"

>>223351

The mandolin sounds very nice in bluegrass music. I enjoy the sound of the instrument a lot.

>>223356

Apparently I mandolin is tuned identically to a violin. So notionally if you can play one you could play the other.

No long necks for me tonight

>>223355

heckin sweet digits tonight bros

>>223358

stubbies?

>tfw suppressed

>>223360

Chicken and rice

>>223358

What about long aboriginal penises?

>>223361

>>223364

The NEETcommune better have a band.

>>223365

I agree.

Make NEETs sing for their supper.

>>223300

How did you know?

Had quite a few wanks today.

>>223369

Please be more precise

>>223369

More than three?

>>223371

So you had a handful so to speak?

Wanks by the dozen

>>223373

raper's dozen

>>223374

that was a movie staring ernest borogine

>>223373

I wank abos in pairs

>>223376

a boong in the hand is worth two in the bush

>>223377

these fucking digits are making me horny

>>223315

Me and the misso watched Cat Ballou

>>223379

Cats doing ballet?

I might cum with >>223388

>>223382

I feel you bro

>>223378

metric or imperial digits?

>>223384

Thanks but it's not quite the same

>>223385

Just be glad there's no decimal point involved. Somebody would have a hard time of it.

no wanking

nil

UNF

>>223388

FUCK YOU

>>223367

How many?

>>223392

I know it's you, you dirty marsupial.

>>223397

did you even reach full chub?

>>223399

i love these digits

>>223456

>>123456

Good night everybody.

I can go to bed contented tonight.

>>223322

>>223333

>>223344

>>223355

>>223366

>>223377

>>223388

>>223399

>>223403

Good night neet

Night chimps

>>223315

I left because I had a nap, I am about to go to bed now, good night NEET

>>223404

impressive

>>223406

NK ya fancy boong

>>223410

I suspect you may be incorrectly labeling that neet

>>223411

>Emu Export

Am I?

I think one of the rape groupies ordered a case of emu so they could imitate their idol.

>>223414

what if NK gave him a case to act as a distraction

they'll think that NEET is NK and geo track him there while NK will be hot on the trail of their arse and rape em

>>223415

i wonder what this benis language means

>>223418

He says something along the lines of

>Its night time now, time to go to sleep

>Then a prayer

>Snoring sounds

>And finally excitement about waking up

>>223202

I have no privacy at my place either, I don't even have a backyard too. If my blinds aren't closed people can see right in - very uncomfy.

True NEET poverty living.

>>223421

You just need to give them a reason to look away

>>223422

That would be quite easy for me

>>223411

I don't go outside unless I have too

>>223427

good benis to you too

>>223426

Gotta keep that neet tan somehow

>>223416

That's too much work even for rape

>>223427

Sleep tight numerous winged NEET

I am off too, good night friends.

2 hours laying in bed trying to sleep

I need a long neck

>>223434

Or a long aboriginal cock

That's enough for today. Night Night NEETs.

>>223241

Good morning neets

>>223435

I like to think that Dan Murphy is really scotts-irish, and therefore not irish at all.

Good morning everybody.

>>223441

That's Bruce.

>>223442

Bruce is well known to be of scottish ancestory

>>223437

>'an Irish cabin is described as being the most miserable-looking hovel that can well be imagined. It is generally built of mud, and consists of only one room. There is neither chimney nor window. The door lets in the light, and should let out the smoke, but that for the sake of the heat it is mostly preferred to keep it in, which injures the complexion of the women. The roof, consisting of turf straw potato-stalks or heath, has often a hole in it, and weeds sprouting from every part, giving it all the appearance of a weedy dunghill, upon which a pig or a goat is sometimes seen grazing. The furniture accorded with the cabin, often consisting only of a pot for boiling the potatoes, and one or two stools probably broken. A bed is not always seen, the family often lying upon straw, equally partaken of by the cow and the pig.'

>"A history of the Irish poor law, in connexion with the condition of the people" - George Nichols

hmmm, a blueprint for the future neet compound?

>>223445

>John Cleese's character (who in a later sketch is called Bruce Beer) recites the seven faculty rules at the University of Woolamaloo:

No poofters.

No member of the faculty is to maltreat the "Abos" in any way whatsoever—if there's anyone watching.

No poofters.

I don't want to catch anyone not drinking in their room after lights out.

No poofters.

There is no rule six.

No poofters.

Mornin lads

Just had a dream I got to shoot chickens, never done that before

>>223448

Morning, I had a dream that I was back in highschool

>>223424

Pretty sure Gerry Adams has referred to the Irish as black before.

>>223450

https://www.thejournal.ie/gerry-adams-tweet-django-2748459-May2016/

>>223451

He needs an emergency negroplasty

Good morning, haven't been up this early in months

>>223453

Good morning, what are you going to utilise these extra hours on?

>>223454

Wanking

>>223455

Planking

>>223456

Clanking

>>223457

Cranking

>>223458

Thanking

>>223459

Banking

Dranking

>>223454

Study, gotta travel an hour first.

But I'll be doing all of the above in the afternoon

Have a plank

>>223464

Have a spank

Fags to the left of me

Boomers to the right

Here I am

Stuck in the middle with Jews

>>223464

>too lazy to buy junk food

This is the perfect time to start a new nutrition regime.

Have my spank

>>223445

Good morning my friend. I can't believe you let me eat all those wicked wings last night. I feel terrible today. Sometimes I wonder whose side you're on.

>>223469

I want you as comfortable as a jolly Dusty.

Semitic intervention

Working in an office accomplishes exactly the same results as NEETing.

I had a look at the sweetcorn plants this morning and I reckon there are about four decent-sized cobs left after I harvested those two the other day. The rest are all tiny.

What a waste of time and effort. And money.

>>223471

>Oy vey Isaac, You just love money too much ! Even for one of us !

>>223469

m8, you're an inspiration to us all - now I have a reason to live, a purpose - I'm going to try these wicked wings for lunch

>>223469

So that I have a target to beat, how many did you have?

>>223476

I had too many, that is all I will say.

I've never seen a man eat so many chicken wings

I've never seen a man eat so many chicken wings

I've never seen a man eat so many chicken wings

No Brian! Those Chicken Wings are really spicy! Don't eat those!

>>223472

Stress, hemorrhoids and a bad diet?

>>223473

Experience doesn't have a price.

Off to wage.

Take care.

>>223480

You forgot to post a pic of your guru.