/jp/ - check pinned thread, please.

Somebody told me I looked like I was 32 years old, on my second wife and paying child support today. I'm 22.

By the way, we're going to want to post a new thread soon, this one seems to be past the bumping limit

>>39088

Mean

>>39088

Is there a bumping limit on 8jp? I thought not.

Even then, there is no need to keep a thread up on any topic 24/7. Especially keeping one bumped to the first page, as would be the only reason to make a new one due to 8jp's massive thread limit.

That 'general thread' mentality is quite frustrating to deal with. SAGEd so hard.

>>39088

You have actually procreated?

How does it feel? Do you not want to be with your child?

>>39093

It's so you can keep up on any new activity, which is pretty helpful on a comfy little board like this.

>>39100

I haven't, the guy was just so stunned when I told him how young I was.

We're on the second page now! We're in real deep shit!

>>39174

hehehehhehehehehe you dumbasses, you fools, you just stood o my trap card

I'm going to become even stronger.

at the rate of new thread creation this thread will still be around til like october anyway

alternatively we could make it cyclical, but that's not very 無常QUALITY

Decided to make an effort to use my left arm more than my right as a little game. I'm hoping that by holding my bag with my left arm rather than my right, I might:

1. Passively become ambidextrous

2. Give off a different look

3. Challenge my brain, giving me more kinesthetic awareness

I know that calling those objectives "optimistic" is understating just how stupid this is, but I think it's been pretty fun so far. Got a little piss on my pants though. So far, having my dominant hand free while my left arm carries out the minimal, effortless (though it starts to hurt very quickly, but if it's just a little pain, I can get through it) task of holding my bag has proven to be a lot more convenient than I thought it's be. I'll post more if I notice anything else.

Earlier today, I was trying to figure out why Existentialist thoughts drive some people into depression. While I was thinking about it, instead of figuring it out, I instead came up with the most amazing outlook on life: The universe is a big fucking place. Imagine the biggest pile of dung you can take and then double-- no, triple that shit and you still haven't come close to one octingentillionth of one of the universe's cornerstones. Yet out of all of that fucking space, all of the relatively less big gallstones and hot air balloons flying through all of that fucking space, I'M the most important thing, for the mere virtue that I happen to be the thing that I am. I could be some fucking brainless chieftan of an uncontacted African tribe and I'd STILL be the most important thing around. Anyway, all you losers miss out on being the most important thing in the universe, unless you're me. But don't worry, since the things in the universe which offer some benefit to me have some value to me, the person who decides what's valuable to me, you can still be somewhat important by either agreeing with my philosophy, or calling me an insecure shithead. Either will please me immensely, it's just the recognition I want really.

I gave myself a name. I don't really know much Japanese yet so I relied on Google Translate.

>>39264

You might be important, but you aren't nearly as important as me in my eyes. I'm the main character of my story. I think that people should strive to become the main character of their own stories, in such a way that they would find such a story enjoyable.

I just googled this name and it brought up the title for some sort of LN that looks trashy. Fitting.

>>39337

Sorry if you feel stupid now that nobody's posting. I just haven't happened to have any especially interesting developments lately.

Today, somebody took one look at me and asked if I'd seen The Blues Brothers. That's the first time somebody's commented on my appearance like that, it's normally about the F.B.I./M.I.B. or even a "hacker" injoke that went around.

It embarrasses me a little, but I'm stubborn and I won't change my look, I already stand out in a crowd and it'd take less superficial changes than wearing new outfits to stop that. When I was young, I drew images of "cool" figures in suits with guns, because the extremely simple shape of a tie and jacket were the only clothes I could do. I can't even draw stars.

I figure I'll just post some of the weirder stuff here and make my usual posts in that other thread.

I fondled my imaginary girlfriend's boobs a lot earlier. I don't actually know what boobs feel like, so I just imagine that they're as soft as possible. All was going well until she slapped me for wasting my time instead of pursuing greatness. I thought about how cool it would be if my left hand was the dominant one a bit after that.

>>39405

It's okay. I can tell if there's a new post by the post count in the catalog.

The fact that you dress in such a way is interesting to me, since I always wear extremely plain clothes.

Dear wageslave diary;

Today I talked to a customer from switzerland (which is nothing special).

His TV had to work some magic and he refused to hang up the phone until his problem was solved. So I had to cover 15 minutes of nothing with him. Luckily he was much better at smalltalk than me, so he started to tell me all about how he studied medicine in 1980-1986 in a town very close to mine. After that he went to japan and worked for a pharma company. Nowadays he's retired. He sounded like he was 40-50 years old, and based on his graduation date im estimating that he went into retirement in his mid 40s. During our conversation he suddenly got a call from japan on another line, so I had to sit there and listen to him go "hai hai wagata".

The moral of the story here is that if you study medicine you can go to japan and retire in your 40s. All this made me a little jealous of him, and part of me wished that he or anyone else would save me from this callcenter hell.

But it can't be helped, it's not good to sit around and wait for a miracle. I have to find a way to save myself out of my own strenght.

>>39432

Interesting story.

>I have to find a way to save myself out of my own strenght.

I agree with this. A person should strive to create his own miracles.

I've been reading too many manga lately and it's been filling me with delusions about what the "ordinary" life is like. When you think about it, it's pretty abnormal for people to have friends worth a damn shit to them, isn't it? But if you'd just read manga, or even watch T.V. shows or even listen to peoples' inflated stories, you'd get the impression that it's abnormal to not have one good friend for a lifetime. I think it's just some kind of weird idealism. In any case, it's really making me feel like I've missed out on too much, and that's the worst kind of feeling

I was staring at a wall today and came to the sudden realisation that, out of nowhere, I'd started perceiving depth more extremely than usual. I don't know how quite to put it, either my senses have seriously changed, like somebody's turned the FOV rate up, or I've just started making a point about noticing how some objects are closer than others. Whatever it is, it's extremely disorienting and since then I've felt like vomiting. It's like looking into a panorama, or a 3DS whenever you turn the slider up more than a fingernail's height. It feels like, instead of just estimating distance by parallax like some kind of cyclops, distance now has real presence to me. 3D movies and shit are probably going to seem way less tacky to me from now on. Anyway, if I suddenly disappear, than that probably means I've found out a way to displace myself on the fourth dimension and isekai'd myself to build up a harem of 2D girls.

On another note, I've been feeling less insecure about little things like the way I walk, my deep voice which sounds very high when I hear it, and the position of my tongue/jaw in my mouth. Pretty weird since that seems to go against suddenly becoming more sensually aware.

>>39480

http://www.bbc.com/future/story/20120719-awoken-from-a-2d-world

>>39480

I have been feeling something similar. I feel more "aware" of myself. I'm catching the "fake me" in the act of doing something I don't actually want to do, remove him and do what I actually wanted to do instead. The less I hold back, the stronger I become. Strength is very important to me. If you stop hearing from me, then it means that I've become a true sorcerer who's hopping through parallel realities like Lady Lambdadelta.

PAN AMERICAN NIGHTMARE

TEN-THOUSAND FEET FUN FAIRE

CONVINCED THAT I DON'T CARE

"SAFE AS HOUSES I SWEAR"!

I WAS JUST SITTING MUSING

THE VIRTUES OF CRUISING

WHEN ALTITUDE DROPPING,

MY EARS STARTED POPPING

ONE MORE RED NIGHTMARE!

SWEAT BEGINNING TO POUR DOWN

MY NECK AS I TURNED ROUND

I HEARD FORTUNE SHOUTING,

"GET OFF OF THIS OUTING!"

A FAREWELL SWANSONG, SEE

YOU KNOW HOW TURBULENCE CAN BE

THE STEWARDESS MADE ME

BUT THE CAPTAIN FORBADE ME

ONE MORE RED NIGHTMARE!

REALITY STIRRED ME

MY ANGEL HAD HEARD ME

THE PRAYER HAD BEEN ANSWERED

A REPRIEVE HAD BEEN GRANTED

THE DREAM WAS NOW BROKEN

THOUGH RUDELY AWOKEN

REALLY SAFE AND SOUND

ASLEEP ON THE GREYHOUND

ONE MORE RED NIGHTMARE!

Dear wageslave diary,

I'm employee of the month at my shitty wageslave job and recently lots of people have been praising me at work.

No matter what I do, I can't feel pride about this.

All I feel is sadness about several things

1) After 1 and a half year I still work at that shithole while most people quit after 1 month.

2) Everyone who works there is so incompetent and stupid that my halfassed, lazy and misantrophic attitude was good enough to make me the best employee

On the bright side, I'm going to get a 44€ voucher for purchases on Amazon, maybe I'll buy some books about occultism with that money. But it's probably gonna take a while before they hand it over since my superiors are like slow retarded children

I'd like to become a more vicious person. I believe that by becoming more selfish, and horrible for absolutely nobody's sake, I might become happier, more self confident, and, funnily enough, have a more agreeable, more presentable personality. Unfortunately, there aren't a lot of reliable guides on this kind of thing, so I'll be largely playing by ear.

>>39715

just stop caring about others

see them as tools at best and obstacles at worst

>>39740

How do I go about that? As things stand, I'm a deeply sympathetic person.

>>39741

I don't know. Maybe you should try to view your overly-sympathetic nature as something wrong, which hurts you more than it helps you.

>>39741

You could try to strenghten your masculine side, that's typically associated with ruthlessness and dominance and will push away your feminine side. But then you are right brain imbalanced and have a whole new problem on your hand.

The best thing to do would be to bring feminine and masculine into balance.

I know what you must be thinking. What does a sorcerer do when he wakes up in the morning?

First I will tell you that when I used to get up in the morning I was highly grumpy. For some reason, no matter when I got up, I'd always be highly angry for no reason, and at the same time I had no appetite and couldn't think straight. Seeing as it was something "normal" which I didn't like, I fought against it until it eventually stopped. This lead to me developing my morning routine. I go through the following stages.

1. Wake up (obviously).

1 (2). Write down dream(s), if I dreamed of anything last night.

2. Exercise. 50 push-ups, 50 sit-ups and 50 squats are the minimum, but I often do more of them and add more type of exercise.

3. Meditate. Exercising first helps clear my head. I meditate according to breath instead of time, so it takes roughly 15-20 minutes to get through it.

4. Cook something for breakfast, typically oatmeal. While theoretically I could just eat slices of bread with stuff on it or something similarly simple, I think that the cooking aspect is important. Cooking requires some sort of effort, and the results tend to be tastier and hopefully healthier. I like oatmeal with peanut butter and a reasonable amount of sugar because it's tasty, healthy and filling. Effort is important because effort is like magic or something, dude.

5. Do two productive things. I'm not allowed to access my computer until I do. They can be almost anything, typically related to learning new skills or honing the ones I already have. The only rule is that it must serves some sort of purpose, even if said purpose isn't really all that important, like thinking of a new dress for my imaginary girlfriend to wear because I'm tired of the old one.

6. Lastly, I read the "to-do list" I prepare for myself the night before multiple times and try my best to follow it.

I'm a shut-in so it's not like I go to work or anything.

Just a thought I had recently, I hadn't really figured out it was a real thing until just now. All throughout my life I'd become severely pissed off whenever people would try to "soothe" a distressed person through cuddling, or kind words, or anything. Whenever people tried to do that for me, I felt like humouring them was just adding to my burden (maybe it helps you by distracting you with those people, rather than whatever's bothering you?, and I projected that onto other people, and I realised, that must not actually be the case for other people. The worried faces they'd make while doing this kind of stuff always looked painfully artificial to me, and I'd become convinced that the fact their faces looked that way was the result of a deliberate contortion of the facial muscles. Like a fake smile versus a genuine one. I'm a very emotive person myself, but my face never moves all that often, at least not that much that I'm aware of. People have told me that I'd have a very solid "poker face", some times. I'm the kind of person who generally cries randomly at some opportunity when they're alone for no real reason, rather than the kind who knows exactly what they're feeling for.

Anyway, I might've gone off track a little there, but I've just considered the possibility that that sort of compassion is real, whereas I always thought that you have "silent compassion" and "attention seeking", no real medium inbetween. Maybe the fact that I don't see that kind of situation often is what makes those kinds of expressions look alien to me? I don't really know, but anyway that kind of self-satisfying ""consolation"" still really bothers me, it's more humiliating than helpful to get treated like some retarded kid that way.

>>39856

How do you feel about people on the internet trying to encourage you and cheer you up?

Until I get fired from this job, I have it, which means I can blogpost a bit about it. It's actually sort of interesting to see what people buy and I feel like it reflects a lot about their personality. But that's not what I want to talk about now. I've been a shut-in for such a long time that I forgot about how my face hardly ever changes from a semi-angry neutral look. Many people who passed by me took note of this fact. On multiple occasions, I was told that I looked "desperate" or something.

Seeing as I refer to myself as a "sorcerer", the thought of a sorcerer working at a normal supermarket comes off as quite funny to me.

>>40009

It would be extremely painful.

I feel horrible, bored, and lonely. I sat outside on my balcony just earlier for a little while, and listened to the normally irritating sound of a party going on nearby. It made me feel a little better.

Oh, right, guess I should mention the "lonely" thing. I often feel this way lately, but recently, a group I'd been frequently just had its leader leave it. The members were dwindling down from 8 to an eventual head of 4 because of bullshit drama, which made me feel more and more obligated to post and keep the thing alive (that's how these things work, even more so when it's not some anonymous messageboard which you can generally trust to work automatically without you). The leader kind of left because of some old stuff with everyone, he's got this kind of persecution complex and he thinks some people are on the other "side" because they don't feel as strongly as him about these past events I and a couple of others happened to be totally uninvolved with. And eventually he left. I don't know, there's probably more I should say about it, I'm not representing it right. Maybe he just felt like it was futile to expect the group to keep "working", and since us last few would never work up the courage to leave or anything, he decided to bring it to an end himself? I can definitely understand his position, and I might've done exactly the same thing, but maybe people are right about him and his feeling victimised.

I'm not sure what kind of emotional impact this has had on me, but it's probably worth reporting. After all, it took away one of the ways I might help myself alleviate myself from this.

My right shoulder hurt. It wasn't anything serious, but it irritated me. I knew that it would go away eventually, but I wanted to try something. What sort of Sorcerer cannot heal things? (the answer is most of them because healing is more of a Cleric thing but whatever). So I tried out several words like "heal" but they didn't seem to click until I tried using the words "repair yourself". It was longer but not too long, sounded like a command and the word "repair" implied robotics, which I like. I chanted the phrase in a mythical way a bunch of times and added in some visualization for good measure. Now my right shoulder does not hurt.

>>40217

Pass me some of that. I stretched my left arm too far again and now it feels like there's this fuzzy nerve damage all over, again. This lasted for days on end last time.

Agreed to go bowling today, I came purelu for the Daytona USA machine that had been there. It was replaced with a Despicable Me-themed claw machine and whack-a-mole machine, so I ended up crying. The fact I can cry over dumb shit like that is a sign that I've had an amazingly easy life, which is a little comforting to me, but there was a bit of a precedent.

I've lived in this town for all of my life, and as a part of a high school trip, we all went to that same bowling center. I hate bowling, I think it must be one of the most boring activities in the world, so I chose just to sit down and listen to my music instead. But a teacher started shouting at me to bowl, so I bowled instead. I think I was bawling my eyes out then too, thinking about how much I'd prefer doing something like playing the arcade machine there instead. This time was meant to be a kind of revenge I guess, I've never actually played Daytona, but I love the visuals and the soundtrack, except it was gone this time, so it was just a bit of a repeat of the last incident. Because there were no teachers or anything there though, I just drived home after going into the bathroom for a tissue, and seeing how red my eyes were, how obvious it was that I was crying. I got there before most other people, so it was fine.

The local arcade did not have Daytona. I played Wangan Night: Maximum Tune instead. I didn't have a banana card and didn't bother spending my money on one, so $2 worth of progress is now gone to the winds.

I created a small tree in my inner world. I deleted it soon after.

>>40361

Plants are big, dumb, and only good for getting in the way. Pave the Earth! (But I'm not joking)

I happened to look down at my index finger, and there was a bunch of blood pooling around this bruised area. It didn't hurt at all, so I have no idea where it came from. That "bruise" though, I feel like that part of my finger has actually been a little gray for the past few days. I guess that they might each be different injuries, the first making my finger more susceptible to damage, and masking the pain. In that case, should I be worried about my finger rotting away?

Not a blogpost, just using this thread as a facet for my strange hobby of inpromptu short essay writing/rambling to nobody in particular.

A primary concern of those tree-woshipping cults which have been politely ignored for the better part of ancient society, and yelled at for their growing obnoxiousness just as of late, is the "health" of the Earth. Not the animals, or even so much the plants mind you- the EARTH. Now I get that they (generally) really do mean the animals or the plants, but this piece of rhetoric seems just so senseless to me that I have to rant about it. Putting aside the fact that we never collectively agreed to pay any debt back to it through any kind of covenant (we've had several self-elected "representatives" do this), how do these people think they can tell just what it is that the Earth wants? What gives them this privileged information?

I think, that, if I at least were the Earth, I'd much prefer that the funny looking prenatal apes should cover my surface than plants or beasts. And this isn't some kind of intelligence bias, or forced, uncontextualised admiration for humanity itself, based off of some cool passages from sci-fi novels, it's based off of a very basic principle.

The plant biomes are these dense, concentrated death orgies (an orgy of death, and an orgy with a lot of death going on in the background, some of this orgy happening on top of that death) where everyone can't think of anything to do other than making as many babies in as short a time as possible. The Earth might not even mind the fact that plants and animals screw on top of corpses of deceased ancestors who did the same their entire lives, it's not its own business- but one thing it'd never forgive is the way those plants just had to get IT involved. The Earth would just be fine with watching all of this havock going on, but then, unexpectedly, the plants have the gall to penetrate IT. But let's ignore that, on the off-chance that it likes that kind of thing, because say what you will about humans and their tendency to penetrate things that may or may not want it, but at least they have the courtesy to clean up after themselves, and NO PLANT has ever been so thoughtful.

Hell, we LOVE it! Histories of plant death sex parties have frozen theirselves in history, embedded theirselves into the Earth, and for some strange reason, we just can't seem to get enough of digging these up out of the ground, and then burning them. Until we decode the "bloop", we won't be able to tell the Earths' opinion for certain, but that big noise it made then ought to have been a whole-hearted "Thank you".

Note: Since it is explicitly biological matter that plants root into the Earth for, it may be sensible to assume that the original large plants had moss-like qualities, growing OVER Earth instead.

You know how I mentioned that I was using my left arm to do some things, the most consistent action being carrying my bag around?

Well, I could tell a little ways in that it was doing a toll on me, so I stopped until the bad feeling hurt before resuming again. Well, I didn't know the least of it.

For shits and giggles, I decided to punch the air a few times, as I'm really not all that used to hitting anything in any way at all, and thought that I may as well give it a try- I might enjoy it.

First I went with five swings of my right arm. Even if I added this little twist in, a little trick I got from some old martial arts instruction video a few months ago, I could tell that I wasn't doing it right at all. Whatever.

I tried my left arm, to see how well I could co-ordinate, and while the momentum propelled it from myself, I heard a very, very distinctive click. The shoulder joints in each of my arms have a bit of a hyper-extension issue, one which could probably be easily corrected with some kind of rudimentary muscle training (fapping is the most strenuous exercise I do at least once a month), but this one felt different. Whenever I threw my left arm, it'd consistently disconnect, and have to slide back into place as I returned it.

I gave up on the punches. I should probably give up on that habit of carrying my bag with my left arm too, lest it fall off entirely.

I keep finding random things buried in the sand in my inner world.

Recently I feel like people are copying my interests, it's really taking away my sense of uniqueness.. but maybe I'm just taking more note of these things after getting interested into them so it seems like that?

confusing..

>>42134

Stop copying my doubts you.