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/jp/ - check pinned thread, please.

And keep moving, jpsies.

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Listen to /jp/Radio! | /jp/'s board ring | Board log | Tearoom channel
I am still alive.

File: be4febe20d606f8⋯.png (127.36 KB,624x703,624:703,IMG_0194.PNG)

File: 84e51ce7ccd6743⋯.png (195.48 KB,631x702,631:702,IMG_0193.PNG)

 No.42675 [Open thread]

I would go on a big tirade about how you're all oxygen thieves with no worth in the real world, but I don't want to. This is more of a wake up call. Why do you miserable bastards keep ruining your chances at gaining success, to play VN's and desperately try to become gooks? Just, why? I don't want you to kill yourselves. I just want you to take a minute and consider how much of a burden you are putting on you're family. Look at yourselves at make a change. The fact is, you have to get off your ass and do something to be happy. Sitting in front of a screen and fapping to imaginary girls doesn't make you happy. None of this will make you happy. Just do what makes you happy, and you'll make it. I want all of you to just be happy.

13 postsomitted. Click reply to view. ____________________________
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 No.43708

>>43707

I prefer the first really. I don't find the Japanese to be attractive,.

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 No.43712

What is success? Do I really want to experience your conception of success?

I didn't choose to be brought into this world, the choice was made by someone else. Those responsible fund much of my continued existence. Perhaps one day they will wake up and decide not to fund me any further, and let me drift off back into non-existence.

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 No.43725

File: 3356151f68e3c14⋯.jpg (21.42 KB,331x331,1:1,1536380706619.jpg)

>>42675

your thread is shit, SHIT!

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 No.43737

File: 5b9b0833e2ea1c3⋯.jpg (479.53 KB,1185x1600,237:320,iP! - September 2006 issue.jpg)

>>42675

Interesting, I wasn't expecting a story like this out of that image.

https://ja.wikipedia.org/wiki/iP!

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 No.43753

>>43737

I like that image quite a bit.

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File: dc2a6bafbf690c4⋯.png (335.52 KB,850x700,17:14,7052e2fb74241ddb05f76833ba….png)

 No.43584 [Open thread]

A lady came into the store one day, asking for some music!

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 No.43585

Fuck 2008 manbaby niggers

Move on from that literal Whohu

It's 2019

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 No.43595

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 No.43676

File: ae51a81d752befd⋯.jpg (176.82 KB,733x631,733:631,e5c06f7f0db02f3931188263f7….jpg)

Some music, she wanted!

FELT, she got!

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File: 9ef631e81e2ef1b⋯.jpg (635.1 KB,1920x1862,960:931,32bd097d60e25e75c443ac839a….jpg)

 No.43442 [Open thread]

Which touhou has the best ass?

1 postomitted. Click reply to view. ____________________________
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 No.43444

I think you are better off asking /2hu/

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 No.43447

The answer is inside your heart.

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 No.43642

Easily Tewi or Suwako.

They are the ass Touhous for me.

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 No.43643

Butt-hus or ass-hus?

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 No.43675

I can't quite put my finger in it but this ass looks familiar.

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File: e9ab41d46328b53⋯.png (944.53 KB,1010x1497,1010:1497,13074016ab217f03b4cf7caddf….png)

 No.43436 [Open thread]

Which 2hu has the best cunny?

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 No.43437

can I touch it..?

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 No.43439

Whoa, is it really okay to look?

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 No.43607

File: 64ba6e2879c33f7⋯.png (884.61 KB,900x1200,3:4,68724627_p6.png)

>>43437

>>43439

Actually, you must.

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 No.43608

>>43607

If you lick it, will you start hallucinating?

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File: 2d3f69ee9d51518⋯.jpg (326.29 KB,917x2018,917:2018,2994ad648fc4750844bb39b75a….jpg)

 No.37243 [Open thread]

あなたが招待している!

お友達とアメリカのスポーツボールを見て、/sp/!!

>いつ。

2月4日 - 全体の日。

>どこ。

https://endchan.xyz/sp

>持っていくもの?

あなた自身の軽食およびアルコールを持って来なさい。上品な風俗嬢が提供されます。

滞在中は、アニメガールフレンドやアジアのラスカルアライグマを同伴できます。

我々はそこに表示されます!

8 postsand3 image repliesomitted. Click reply to view. ____________________________
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 No.43541

File: d4b7d51a4794e23⋯.png (77.13 KB,1362x644,681:322,success_breeds_jealously.png)

>>43532

I laughed.

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 No.43542

File: db72dc36af47208⋯.jpg (32.67 KB,238x270,119:135,rustle_computer.jpg)

>>37243

whovian carrion amy moore? imagination boreds yarr! deed meow.

who cares any more? image boards are dead now.

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 No.43544

>>43542

oh, it's you again

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 No.43575

File: ae461885f31aab3⋯.mp4 (852.83 KB,360x360,1:1,Sgt Lewis - @Hyper_kyuun-1….mp4)

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 No.43576

>>43542 rustle doesn't type like that

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File: b351d7ebc7d3860⋯.jpeg (168.05 KB,450x600,3:4,f009e54f18eccfd76035c01c6….jpeg)

 No.36041 [Open thread][Last50 Posts]

someone forgot to pay the bill

234 postsand42 image repliesomitted. Click reply to view. ____________________________
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 No.43374

This thread is fucking stupid.

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 No.43380

>>43374

I don't know what you expected from the contents of /jp/'s brain.

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 No.43383

I attended a course called "conflict resolution" and was severly disappointed. We didn't learn about any mindcontrol techniques

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 No.43492

File: 113e0fbb1cc91af⋯.png (815.23 KB,1386x1842,231:307,Untitled.png)

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 No.43507

File: 6397d903f0207f4⋯.jpeg (38.72 KB,596x414,298:207,DyM7wH8X0AI33eh.jpg:orig.jpeg)

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YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

 No.42946 [Open thread]

Oh, it's Winter now.

1 postomitted. Click reply to view. ____________________________
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 No.42952

>>42951

What will your final wish be.

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 No.42953

>>42952

There is only one final wish my friend

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 No.42965

>>42953

Is it a puppy?

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 No.42967

>>42965

maybe..

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 No.43475

>>42953

Why do you have to be so sad

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File: 95630b3cdf7a4db⋯.png (1.35 MB,1072x1500,268:375,1537991562639.png)

 No.43435 [Open thread]

Is she aware that I can see her panties??

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 No.43438

But they are covered by her pantyhose,so its not lewd

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File: df57ee7aebf1894⋯.jpg (741.03 KB,1093x981,1093:981,1545318872046.jpg)

 No.43204 [Open thread]

It's the best time of the year yet this board does not look very festive!

Stop shitposting for once and take it easy!!

Merry Christmas /jp/!

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 No.43205

File: 9ed5edc61559246⋯.jpg (149.87 KB,850x850,1:1,merrychristmas.jpg)

Hey man, I don't appreciate you telling me what to do. But I wish you a merry christmas

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 No.43206

I'm not doing anything for Christmas this year, but I want to wish you all a Merry Christmas, Mr. Lawrence

stay comfy!

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 No.43211

>>43206

That's "Law" retard

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 No.43212

Merry Christmas to you all as well.

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 No.43292

File: bef26fa15511cfc⋯.png (374.02 KB,600x800,3:4,gjk.png)

Happy holidays, /jp/.

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File: b7877eff80cf9b7⋯.jpg (36.82 KB,480x564,40:47,1480104750925.jpg)

 No.43283 [Open thread]

明けましておめでとうございます!!

(That means happy new year on "nihongo")

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 No.43284

happy 2019 to all the millennials who've never had a real relationship with their boomer parents

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 No.43285

>>43283

>明けましておめでとうございます!!

Translate it weebs.

Happy new year.

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 No.43286

>>43284

Millennial parents are from Gen X though.

>>43285

tl note: omedetou means itadakimasu

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 No.43291

File: 177538ea81aa214⋯.png (880.1 KB,1600x900,16:9,adsfh.png)

You t-too, OP.

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File: 4226001d2cec26a⋯.jpg (981.6 KB,1394x1920,697:960,yn.jpg)

 No.43278 [Open thread]

Test

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 No.43279

Did your test produce the desired results?

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File: baee07791f876b5⋯.jpg (278.76 KB,1600x899,1600:899,OUTO.jpg)

 No.43216 [Open thread]

キタ―――(゚∀゚)―――!!

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File: 685906dc49d6436⋯.webm (2.93 MB,640x640,1:1,685906dc49d64362697344e73….webm)

 No.43190 [Open thread]

The average /jp/ anon

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 No.43198

That is beautiful.

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 No.43199

お目出度う

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 No.43200

that would involve going to a public place though...

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 No.43261

Does that webm have three watermarks?

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File: 1a55b852d67dfde⋯.png (1.74 MB,1119x1437,373:479,1468788395904.png)

 No.31335 [Open thread][Last50 Posts]

Who's a dream otaku here?

399 postsand80 image repliesomitted. Click reply to view. ____________________________
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 No.43196

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>43195

A great big soul gem, brought to the Earth by the alien who eliminated most Reptillian life on the planet and introduced their own Mamillian life forms. Life on Earth as it's currently known was actually just an alien's scheme to charge its portable DVD player.

Speaking of aliens, I remember this dream lately where I was the side kick to this sort of magician as we were investigating, and trying to fix this city where everyone had decided to GEDDAN. In what seemed like a high-tension situation, with numerous people violently jilting towards us, I was casually assured that we weren't in any kind of danger, and it was suggested that I stare in the space in-between these two palm trees. We were near this typical cove-house at the border of a beach, and through those trees there was a sort of road strip on top of the water, presumably to receive crates from cargo ships (unusual for beaches, probably). On that road driving inland, there was this silver, unmarked truck. I kept my gaze fixed in-between the trees, and I saw the container on the back disappear completely for just under a second before it came back again, past that gap inbetween the trees. It might be a weird thing to get upset by, especially in comparison to those body-horrors which were probably getting closer to me by the moment, but I felt such strong dread and confusion that my skin went totally cold. Basically, I could tell that what I just saw was very important somehow, but my mind refused to piece together exactly why. I was told that this was "the only existing evidence of extra-terrestrial life", and the man chuckled, "on Earth". Well I guess on his previous wacky adventures in outer space or wherever, he figured out that the existence of aliens would be totally well-known to most other aliens doing their own interstellar travel.

I guess it's not that interesting a dream, but it was the only really memorable one I've had lately. I could also talk about the one where I was a guy who tried to avoid drowning in a damaged, underwater submarine to the point where these astonished outlookers just felt like I should give up and get the dying bit over with already. There was this sad music playingPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

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 No.43304

I dreamt that I tried to steal two random floppy disks from some I.T. guy's drawer in a space center. They each had a pink envelope each, labelled in green marker as "Programs" and "Games". It was only on a whim, but I felt like these disks would contain some deeply important data. It wasn't too long after I was out of the room that sirens started to sound, and this was something I was expecting a little. Somehow I was sure that they wouldn't have any way to tell that it was me as long as I got out of there quickly. I did so, and I'd gotten to where I'd left a car in a parking area. There was this chick cop there though, who confronted me. There, I felt like it might've been totally obvious that I had commit that crime. Well she started questioning me. Not questions like "what are those envelopes you've got in your jacket pocket" or "did you know that there's an emergency at the space center right now?", but much more general ones pertaining to what I do at home, and about my lifestyle as a whole. I could tell that she wasn't trying to determine my guilt, but she was actually worried about me. Basically, she wanted to ascertain whether I had deliberate, malicious intent, or whether I was doing it on a whim, maybe for the thrill of it.

At that point, I was scared, felt like I might've gotten myself into some deep shit. Why would they ask me these kinds of questions? Could it be that I was already in serious trouble, and she was trying to find any way she could to lighten my eventual court sentence? Was she considering offering any kind of unwarranted, involved help in my day-to-day life? I was really concerned that I might lose my liberty either way.

Not much more from my dream last night in that vein. There was something about a super power highschool afterwards, but I don't think there's any connection between those two narratives.

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 No.43305

There was also another dream in there about the making of an important amateur film which was shot entirely outdoors, in this one field. I don't really remember, but I think it had this incredible story to its creation, and that the narrative was harrowing. It had something to do with aircraft pilots. I think one of the (or the sole?) producers and actors of the film had died somehow, maybe in the creation of it. In honour of the movie, there was a bit of a tradition to remake it in that exact same field. Other amateurs and even big-time hollywood studios jumped on this. It was a very well-known phenomenon.

I can't remember exactly how it went, and I feel like I've had this dream several times before (as any really, but this one has a bit of a personal affect on me), but it felt quite harrowing to me, maybe. I have deep respect for the creator of that film.

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 No.43385

Another dumb action-packed and mostly logical dream, apparently about human/giant snake Godzilla this time.

Dreamt about a laser-shooting monster that was mostly shaped like a person at first. It started off normally enough, I was eating in this restaurant and there were a few wacky side characters like a gang boss and a chef, and suddenly the ground starts shaking and people are screaming.

Rather than legging it out of the building, I was one of those people who could somehow just tell it was some un-Earthly monster attacking and NOT just a monster earthquake, so I hid in a bathroom stall, and even though the gaps inbetween the doors were wide, I did what I could to hide the fact the stall was occupied by standing on the seat itself and crouching just a little. Fortunately, as the thing passed, it didn't seem to notice that the door was locked.

I heard a scream from the space next to the stalls, and for which reason I can't remember, I figured out that it could only "see" those who had looked at it eye-to-eye. Using this new-found knowledge, I climbed over the stalls to individually address each group of this dense bathroom community and whisper that secret to them.

Apparently a naive little girl (probably 9 or younger) heard this and decided to exit the stall. If this wasn't bad enough, she'd managed to look the thing in the eyes anyway. I jumped out, thinking I'd rescue her from it since I was such an invisible badass. Well when it felt the kind of small tap of my foot connecting with its ankle, it realised that I must've been exploiting its weakness. Well something like a whirlwind of blue faces started flying around it, and as one touched me, it grinned, and I'm pretty sure I died soon after. Apparently, if it uses up more of its laser energy to do that move, it can see people after the faces make tactile contact with them.

Forunately, I got another chance, and that bathroom stall scene started again, except for that fact that I was some guy in shades and a floral shirt. With my previous knowledge, I figured out that the first of those items may be a huge boon to me. So my eyes were glued to that thing as it passed, and not long later did I discover that thPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

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 No.43386

Since it had been toying around with me for some time, it apparently didn't object to me attaching that thing back to my face and getting out of there. I had learned one thing: while the shades may not make a person INVINCIBLE, they at least stop a person from being seen from that thing's "eyes" as long as it doesn't use some other sense to detect you.

Since it had so graciously given me a head-start, I ran out of there and tried to hide somewhere else outside, where it eventually came near. I tried to sneak away, but it noticed the noise of the grass crunching that I hadn't been able to avoid by tip-toeing away slowly, so instead I opted to just run wildly again. It didn't follow.

I was picked up by some tuxedo man this floral shirt guy apparently knew and we entered the Batcave by some tube entrance by a huge statue conspicuously placed right in the middle of the fucking road. Apparently the passcode to enter this was by transmitting a sequence of every printable unicode character by descending order of codepoint index from a special phone. Kind of a dumb passcode if you ask me, but it apparently kept people out. Apparently this was one hideout for an international Kaiju-fighting force.

From there, with my experience right up close with the monster (who had apparently gotten larger while I was away), I was made to choose from a host of cards of giant monsters who'd attacked the Earth previously to be pit against this monster which was apparently a giant snake now (I saw it through some camera footage). Well I wasn't qualified at all, so I blew my choice of selecting some giant bee that had been so crap against even the humans that it was on the brink of death in its own containment cell. For whatever reason, I was sure of my choice (I had read somewhere that giant bees are the giant snake's natural predator or something), and right when I wasn't able to take that choice back anymore, I realised that a giant mongoose or something would obviously be a much better choice according to tradition, since this thing basically suited the description of a basilisk.

Pretty anxious about my terrible choice, I go out to watch and the giant bee never even arrives. Apparently it died on the way or somethPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

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File: 7b9e6ee84833539⋯.jpg (121.11 KB,900x675,4:3,47927bca5e897ccec6fc1f1d18….jpg)

 No.38299 [Open thread]

How many dirty cups are in your room?

20 postsand4 image repliesomitted. Click reply to view. ____________________________
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 No.42619

The one I am currently drinking from.

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 No.43177

>>42539

No the more the better.

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 No.43191

One. I got a GuP mug and it's sitting in my room gathering dust because I don't want people to see it if I put it inside.

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 No.43192

>>43191

I do the same thing with my Katawa Shoujo mug it would be weird if people saw it.

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 No.43194

>>43192

Fucking crossies.

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