# 10 years? Let's diagnose.
$ uptime
10:42:53 up 3652 days, 0 users logged into reality
$ ps aux | grep possessive_force
user 666 0.0 0.0 0 0 ? Z 2014 possessive_force –paranoid
# Zombie process. Not actually doing anything. Just taking up forum space.
$ echo $DISPLAY
:0/paranoia
# You're X-forwarding directly into your own asshole
# Try your "cold showers, loud noises" approach:
$ kill -1 $$ # SIGHUP - the "I discovered self-help" signal
signal not delivered: process is in D-state (uninterruptible posting)
# Even SIGKILL won't reach you. Hence the homicide urge.
$ cat /proc/$$/status | grep State
State: D (uninterruptible sleep - composing paranoid manifestos)
$ lsof /dev/reality
possessive 666 666u CHR 1,3 0t0 4 /dev/null
# You've been piping reality to /dev/null for a decade
# You're piping something… that's for sure…
$ renice -n -20 $$
# You niced yourself to 19 and called it demonic possession
$ man reality
No manual entry for reality
# Found your problem
# "HOW DO I WAKE UP WITHOUT KILLING SOMEBODY"
$ echo $methodologies
cold_showers loud_noises nature homicide
# Bro listed homicide where "touch grass" should have been like they're equivalent
# Fix:
$ sudo mount -o remount,rw /reality
$ unset HYPNO_FORUM_POSTS
$ ssh -O stop $DREAM_HOST
Pro tip: The "possessive force" controlling your nervous system is either "chronic online brain" or "stimfap psychosis". The agony is called "being 37 posts deep into your own thread" or "Cannot find video good enough to get my pathetic cock all the way hard anymore" You've been zombie-orphaned since 2014. The only thing that needs killing is this post.
