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File: d9d4f6e2fcb50e2⋯.png (382.67 KB,369x684,41:76,nohomo.png)

 No.385141 [Last50 Posts]

Is anyone else here confused about their sexuality?

I know I am.

I'm a virgin and I've never been in a relationship but I don't know if I like guys or not.

I'm attracted to some of the people here and I've seen guys where I've thought "Hey, they're cute" but I'm also attracted to girls.

I seem to be attracted to more girls than I am guys; am I just confused.

Is it my inexperience in relationships turning into confusion about my own sexuality?

Can anyone here relate?

____________________________
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 No.385142

Hon….if you're a virgin and never been in a relationship you haven't even figured out what you're doing yet.

Half of a healthy person's sexuality is designed by the people you find yourself attracted to IRL, you can't really question your sexuality because you occasionally enjoy yaoi or something because thats not sexuality thats just masturbating to things that make you feel dirty and everyone engages in that…thats called a "kink" and a kink doesn't define your sexuality.

I know my own sexuality is pretty fluid because as I was growing up in my teens I had a couple really serious deals with male friends of mine that I still kinda miss to this day, but I've also had relationships with females over the years and I liked those to.

Give yourself some time to let other people touch you and figure out what really makes you feel good…then you'll start knowing a little better what you are.

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 No.385143

File: 253eadb45937e7c⋯.jpg (52.5 KB,637x685,637:685,curious.jpg)

>>385142

What you're saying seems to make sense but I'd just like to clarify some things, if that's ok.

>people you find yourself attracted to IRL, you can't really question your sexuality because you occasionally enjoy yaoi

I've found some 3d guys attractive but they were always feminine, in looks not the insufferable cliché "gay guy feminine", and was worried that I was just attracted to their femininity.

>Give yourself some time to let other people touch you and figure out what really makes you feel good

A lot of this internal conflict comes from my rather traditionalist views and I feel extremely conflicted with what I find attractive and my core beliefs.

I'd also hate to get with a guy and find out I don't like them. (I think that would be too cruel to the partner)

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 No.385144

>>385143

I'm not sure where "getting with a guy" basically translated down to "meet me in 15 minutes to suck my dick in the back of a Denny's bathroom" buuuut…..what I mean here is….the natural interaction of individuals together is what generates actual attraction.

You should never "get with a guy" then find out you don't like them because by the time it gets down to put up or shut up…you should already be pretty sure you dig that person a lot and you're willing to do whatever with them as long as it makes you both happy.

Never "get with a guy" in any other way, or it will feel wrong and you'll end up anxious and complicated by it. Always kiss a friend, and you'll never be upset by the fact that you did.

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 No.385146

Personally I don't think you need to sleep with someone of the same sex (or the opposite for that matter) to know what's your thing. You have got a ton of ways of knowing what you dig that do not involve having to sleep with someone. When I started dating I was 100% a virgin, but I already knew I was into guys because I explored myself a lot through porn, dildos and such. I am now safely sure that I couldn't have sex with a girl even if I had to.

Hell, even shortly after starting masturbating when I was in my early teenager years it didn't take me long to notice that boys were much more attractive to me than girls. What you need to do, as I see it, is not try both sexes and see what you prefer; what you truly need is to be sincere with yourself. If you do sleep with both sexes but you feel confused and wanting yourself to be straight, you'll just end up lying to yourself. Put aside all societal pressure and assumptions about yourself for a while and listen to your raw instincts. Then you'll have your answer. And don't be scared about what you find out.

Posting from a proxy because of reasons.

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 No.385149

>>385146 here.

Also: you don't have to give up your traditionalist views. In this very board we have a lot of cute boys with conservative, libertarian and other non-left wing views.

t. A centrist with deep dislike for LGBTABCDEF+++ activism.

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 No.385152

>>385146

>you'll just end up lying to yourself. Put aside all societal pressure and assumptions about yourself for a while and listen to your raw instincts.

As someone probably much closer to death than you all I agree with this. Life comes at you fast….the boys I loved when I was young…and me…we all had to grow up, society and family and expectations and all that crap.

I don't regret the relationships I had with women, but I do miss the boy I was before I let the world run away with me.

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 No.385165

>>385141

I can't see myself loving a woman, and I just have no interest in them whatsoever. But at the same time, I'm not sure if I want to be with a guy or a girl. Almost entirely because of children. I have a really strong desire to at least have the option to have children. No, adoption is not having children, and I certainly would never ever ever put a child through being raised by gay parents. Also, most guys aren't attractive to me. That doesn't mean I'm one of those people who only want guys who look like girls. I hate traps. Girls aren't really attractive to me either. I think I'm just not attracted to many people in general. I'm only really interested in twinks, although there have been a few very masculine guys that I've been attracted to.

Even being in a relationship and actually sleeping with a guy still leaves me confused. I was worried about if I'd want to stay with him for the rest of my life or if I was making a mistake and should have found a woman so I could have kids. It's funny because this feeling is exactly why I've always avoided bisexuals and was scared of them while I tried to convince myself i was 100% exclusively gay and would never be bi in a million years.

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 No.385173

>>385149

That activism is the reason why you aren't currently imprisoned in a facility getting electroshock therapy to cure you of your deviant sexuality. So show some fucking respect, you underaged shitbag.

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 No.385183

>>385141

these kinds of thread trigger me quite a lot

Sexuality is fairly, excuse the pun, straight forward. actual true homosexuals feel the attraction to the same sex, the same way heterosexuals feel attraction to the opposite sex

if you have to ask yourself IF you're gay while not being able to pop boners to members of the same sex or not being able to feel deep feelings for the same sex , then you are not gay.

You just feel desperate and sex deprived, as is the same for a LOT of guys i've talked to on this board.

True homosexuals know their sexuality around the same time heterosexuals do. Fake homosexuals typically call themselves "bisexual" and say things like "all women suck/all whores/etc"

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 No.385200

>>385173

That's exactly what I was thinking.

Now, all of a sudden ignorant 18 year olds think it's somehow cool to hate on LGBT activists by feigning some sense of superiority to them, when, as you said, if it weren't for them they would most likely be burning in some oven or locked up in a cell ; and not only that but they have done nothing to deserve the superiority they claim except being indolent on the internet and forming their simpleton political views based on low quality image infographics and UFO/infowards youtube docus .

Like, fuck, stop frequenting /b/ and /nazi/ and start having a real good look at yourself and the world and who has been fighting for your rights all this time.

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 No.385201

>>385183

Not going to argue with this person because there's no point, but here's an alternative view for you to consider, OP. Sexuality IS complicated and weird. And regardless of whether or not you qualify as someone's definition of "true gay" or whatever the fuck, your attraction to boys isn't somehow not a part of your sexuality. In my personal experience, the more you dwell on sexual orientation in terms of strictly defined words, the more difficult it gets. So just don't give a fuck about labels and fugg who you wanna fugg.

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 No.385207

>>385200

>>385173

I won't derail this thread just because of you both. You wanna talk about LGBT activism, create another thread.

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 No.385230

>>385141

my sweet anon <3

sexuality is like water; it has a constant change, a constant force; constant beauty. One day you may feel like the gayest man alive, putting things in your bum until you cum,

and other days, you may feel like it's your duty to procreate with the world, so you edge for 12 hours just to see how many babies would be possible

To see your sexuality as an ever-changing force is liberating. You are not gay, you are not straight, you are not bisexual, you are all of these, and none of these.

you are yourself;

your sexuality is your own.

label it, if you want to. But it needs no name to be understood. Do not hold yourself back Anon, let that river flow.

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 No.385243

File: c94c9dbba521ad9⋯.jpg (554.94 KB,1570x1211,1570:1211,1529432982451.jpg)

I'm also sometimes confused about my sexuality, but I have a boyfriend (LDR). I've broken up with him and gotten back together like 4 times because I'm so autistic about it.

We plan to move in together and I hope I don't disappoint him. I really want to fug him though, so I'm probably gay. The more we talk the more I love him. I connect better emotionally with other guys than women.

OP, I think your orientation will naturally reveal itself over time. You won't just be put in a situation where you have to fuck a guy (or get fucked). There will be a natural building of a relationship culminating before the sex where you will know if you truly like guys.

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 No.385246

File: 45d19f4e884a89b⋯.jpg (113.07 KB,1069x1241,1069:1241,6214bbb7-a941-481a-b7b8-34….jpg)

I don't know what I want. i like pussy but want a cock in my ass too. I really don't understand wtf is going on. call me i need to work this shit out plus maybe we can be friends +7 985 274-83-82

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 No.385248

File: 15d7892206417da⋯.png (651.77 KB,680x936,85:117,ancapmiller.png)

>>385144

I see.

>Always kiss a friend, and you'll never be upset by the fact that you did.

That would be a very bad idea.

Unbelievably bad.

>>385149

That's comforting, I suppose.

>>385183

>>385201

I feel like my main concern is disappointing my father, even unintentionally, since I am his only son.

I don't want to betray my political beliefs but, after some thought, the line of thought always seems to come down to "What would my dad feel like?".

Don't get me wrong, he'd support my decision to be with a guy but I can't help but feel like I'd be hurting him.

>>385230

I don't know how to feel about this comment but I appreciate your contribution nonetheless.

>>385243

>I've broken up with him and gotten back together like 4 times because I'm so autistic about it.

That's concerning to hear, I wish you both the best though.

>I connect better emotionally with other guys than women.

I've found that to be true with me as well.

I seem to get along better with guys than girls.

That might be because I don't make much of an effort to be friends with girls anymore since I've had quite a few say "I wish you were gay so I'd have a gay friend".

I also seem to have little in common with them whereas with guys I can meet one and we can talk for ages and become friends quickly.

>>385246

>want a cock in my ass too

>call me i need to work this shit out

I don't believe in casual sexual intercourse, though I appreciate the offer.

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 No.385254

File: c6e31c8e92ccb92⋯.png (1.04 MB,1024x526,512:263,ClipboardImage.png)

>>385173

>PRIDE totally is still respectable and the same thing as it used to be!!!! pls respect us because we are the same!!!!

Fuck off.

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 No.385255

>>385173

LOL he actually thinks people EVER changed something by standing together and holding a shield up

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 No.385277

>>385248

>"What would my dad feel like?"

What you need to do is first to make sure how you feel about being attracted to guys. Take your family off the equation for a second; you need to make sure you're really attracted to men, and anons have suggested a lot of ways to think about so. When you're feeling secure enough to know what you truly enjoy (men, women, or perhaps both) only then you can start thinking about coming out. It would be far worse for you to come out only to find out you are actually straight and were just confused or curious - you know, what they used to call bi-curious a few years ago. In a way I kinda agree with >>385230, putting labels on anything sexual is very hard. There are only so very few things we can label; this is one of them, if a man is sexually attracted to another man, that's gay.

Once you're truly sure about who you are, only then you should start thinking about stuff like this:

>but I can't help but feel like I'd be hurting him.

French anons might correct me here, but I think it was Robespierre who said "you can't make an omelet without breaking a few eggs". I won't lie here; parents that care about their sons (and daughters) do generally take a hard blow when they find out they enjoy cock (and/or pussy). But there's the Catch 22.

What would hurt them more: know the truth about you at once, or be left in the dark, be told a lie, and dying without ever knowing what his son turly was? So yes, it'll be somewhat rough for him at first, but the alternative is far more hurtful in the long run.

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 No.385297

File: 12eee44c95ac7c9⋯.png (150.61 KB,745x381,745:381,sLKe.png)

im in the same boat, i dont jerk off to 3d porn except on rare occasions but i mainly jerk off to females, traps are fine for me but i do feel attracted to my boyfriend

>>385200

>/nazi/

go away reddit

>>385173

I highly doubt the people who fought for the right for gays not to be institutionalized are the ones who are trying force lgbt bullshit everywhere.

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 No.385328

>>385141

sauce for comic?

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 No.385337

File: 32424a4a0ba874d⋯.png (77.99 KB,622x626,311:313,1415146386759.png)

You're bi if you're attracted to both, it's seriously that simple. Quit trying to excuse it away as confusion. You're not confused, you just know that if you say you're bi, that changes your story about yourself and that's emotionally painful at first, so you avoid it by coming up with every reason under the sun as to how that could possibly not be the case, while still knowing deep down, that's the case.

This is a stupid game you're playing with yourself. Every "straight" guy who fucks other men, or who wants to fuck other men, is by definition not straight. Complicate that all you want but you know you're just delaying the inevitable. Spare yourself the trouble and just be out with it already. I'll do you a favor and respond to every potential criticism you have right now because this game gets extremely old and I know you need your hand held through it.

>but I'm a virgin so I don't know what I want

Of course you do, you just pretend you don't. Virgins aren't "confused" about their sexuality, they just haven't gotten what they want yet. You know what you want and you just have a hard time accepting it. Tough tits.

>but they're cute

Of course they are, but they're still males

>but this one's trans

Good for that one, doesn't change the fact you're getting aroused over males.

>but this one's dressed like a girl or looks like a girl or is feminine, etc etc

Yeah okay, but it's *not* a girl, is it? If you really wanted to be looking at girls, you have a whole internet's worth of girls to look at, but here you are looking at boys, that is not straight.

>but this one's a cartoon/hentai/furshit

It's still the idea of a boy.

>but some guy told me it was straight

That's because he's closeted, too.

>but I'm a dominant and/or it's really alpha to just fuck what you want

You're not fucking anyone so far, you're just fantasizing about boys, as a boy, which makes you bi or gay. Even if you were, you'd be a bi or gay dominant.

>but I mostly like girls

Then you're bi, not gay, congratulations.

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 No.385418

>>385416

"Roman rules" gets tossed around a lot to excuse things away but thank you for pointing out that if you really feel that way, you're bi and in the closet. Genuinely straight and gay men don't cite "Roman rules."

It is possible to be dominant or submissive first, and I admit, I enjoy when bi and especially mostly-straight-but-still-bi straight subs message me. Orientation play is a 10/10 kink and fucking guys out of the closet has a special magic to it, like you're fucking them into being better people, and that's beautiful. You're making the world a better place one orgasm at a time.

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 No.385456

>>385337

i know that im bisexual, i know that i like dick in my ass and mouth, there's no problem there, but traps still arent gay my guy

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 No.385462

File: 189cab3aa74a0bb⋯.png (72.69 KB,645x232,645:232,tumblr_inline_nvuwm8zgqh1s….png)

Take a look at the Kinsey report, a comprehensive study on human sexuality. According to it's results, most men are bisexual to some degree. Besides being a traditional bisexual, you can also be a gradient, having mostly heterosexual attraction with the occasional /cuteboy/ striking your fancy. There is nothing wrong or unusual about this and society is stupid for claiming the pure heterosexuality is the main sexuality, when it's actually rare, making people feel uncomfortable instead of curious about such matters.

Kinsey report on male human sexuality: https://my.mixtape.moe/ibtojw.epub

Kinsey report on female human sexuality: https://my.mixtape.moe/dmnqfu.epub

You can read epub files with the Sumatra reader.

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 No.385469

>>385337

>Of course you do, you just pretend you don't.

This is a fat load of bullshit I've talked to enough autists on here to know that some of them really fucking regret ever having gay sex because while they fapped to the idea they would never ever do so in real life ever again. It's plenty possible to be confused about your sexuality until you're in the act of sex.

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 No.385482

>>385469

It is not possible to be confused about your sexuality until you do something, the very act of doing something like that willingly means you willingly wanted the idea of it, therefore, you can't be straight. It is that simple.

The guys you cite are bi. They sexually want men, they just have one bad time with a guy and then swear off the experience because they think that means every sexual experience with a man will be bad. That doesn't make them straight, just noncommittal. Guys who are "confused" should avoid doing things like that for precisely this reason, they are not able to handle it mentally. It's unfair to the men they sleep with.

>>385456

"Having gay sex isn't gay because I'm bi and I say so," ok bud.

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 No.385483

>>385141

WHAT COMIC IS THAT

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 No.385484

File: 7dde8cedd635c98⋯.jpg (37.49 KB,340x308,85:77,toot toot.jpg)

>>385328

>>385483

I don't know.

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 No.385490

>>385482

You're completely full of shit. So if I get raped I'm obviously not gay because I didn't want it. Yes, or no? If yes, you can have sex with a man and it not be gay for you, because you are hating it and you are being raped. What makes that different from someone going into an experience and realizing, very suddenly, they don't want anything to do with that whatsoever? The fact they tried something new means they love that now? I guess I love all those shitty one time dishes I hated afterwards because I tried them once to figure out if I liked them or not too.

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 No.385491

>>385482

>one time bicurious attempt makes you a faggot for life

<rape doesn't

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 No.385496

>>385490

If you get raped and you didn't want it, then it has nothing to do with what you want, does it? That's someone else forcing themselves in spite of your wants, but it doesn't define them. However, if you do something you *did* want to do, by definition, it's an indicator of something you wanted, so yes, it does reveal something about you. My ability to rape you doesn't mean that you get to honestly call yourself straight after having willing gay sex.

>What makes that different from someone going into an experience and realizing, very suddenly, they don't want anything to do with that whatsoever?

Because they agreed to it initially, obviously. That's an indicator of desire. If they want to stop in the middle, okay, but they still were into trying it. It's like a woman sleeping with a man and then in the morning regretting it and calling it rape, you're using that level of logic. I never in my life have ever thought "you know what maybe I should sleep with a woman to see if I like vagina." If I liked vagina, I'd know. I never have to wonder to myself, hmm, am I into this thing I'm not into?

>The fact they tried something new means they love that now?

Nope, but it means they were into it enough to count as bi. If they didn't want to sleep with a man, they wouldn't have tried sleeping with a man.

>I guess I love all those shitty one time dishes I hated afterwards because I tried them once to figure out if I liked them or not too.

If I eat a burger that someone slapped together using rotten meat and old bread, that burger will make me sick, doesn't mean that I didn't want to eat a burger. Besides, that metaphor is garbage. Hunger isn't the same as attraction. I don't know what a strange food tastes like because I've never been exposed to it, but you for sure have been exposed to men before, you are one. There's more to attraction and arousal than just "oh wow, I wonder what dick tastes like." To even be in that situation, to even be interested in that scenario, being into the core premise is a prerequisite.

Outside of being raped or being unaware of the sex of your partner (glory holes, etc), gay sex can only be performed between men who are bi or gay.

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 No.385500

>>385469

>I've talked to enough autists on here

Doesn't that prove it? I mean if they had sex with guys and hated it and were straight, what are they doing on a gay board?

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 No.385501

>>385500

8chan in general, nice try though.

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 No.385507

To be blunt, no. Look, sexuality is not as complicated as one needs to make it.

You only attracted t guys (including feminine guys) and you're a guy? Congrats, you are Gay/homosexual.

You only attracted to females? (even if masculine/tomboys)

Congrats, you are Straight/Heterosexual

You attracted to both males and females?

Congrats, you are Bisexual

To elaborate more on bisexual, you have three kinds of bisexual people.

1.) Those who are more attracted to the opposite sex (in this case, bisexual guys who are more attracted to women than men). Typically they will only date and have serious relationships with the opposite sex but will fool around and have sexual relations with the same sex but that's as far as it goes.

2.) Bisexuals who are more attracted to the same sex. In this case, bisexual men preferring to date and have relationships with men (regardless of gender presentation -Masculine vs Feminine, doesn't matter). They tend to only have sexual relations with the opposite sex but typically don't date or serious relationships with women. I find this one is the rarest of bisexual men.

3.) Bisexuals who are genuinely 50/50 and it really depends on who expresses interest first and they tend to be open to any with not much leaning.

Also the whole kinsey scale thing, it's useless for homosexual and heterosexual people but mainly helpful for bisexual people in finding their comfort level of where exactly they fall.

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 No.385510

>>385507

>3.) Bisexuals who are genuinely 50/50

Except those are 100% of the times in denial about what they truly like. They exist, but they don't remain like that for very long. Mostly agree with the rest though.

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 No.385525

I honestly wish I was straight simply because infidelity is much, much more common in gay couples than straight couples.

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 No.385530

File: c3c8541d5693d2b⋯.jpg (10.18 KB,250x181,250:181,Data_laugh.jpg)

>>385525

Oh kid, you have NO idea.

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 No.385532

>>385491

Yes it does make you a faggot for life. I don't care if you think that's silly, that's the case. You read as many Buzzfeed articles as you want about "straight" guys having gay sex, but the definition of bisexual is having attraction to both sexes. Obviously if you are interested in having sex with another man, that's same-sex interest and flatly no amount of trying to excuse it away is going to turn it into opposite-sex interest. Yes, one time is enough. Hell, plenty of people know exactly what they are without having had even one experience. Actually, everybody knows, there are just people who are honest with themselves about it and people who aren't.

Why anyone would want to sleep with a closet case is beyond me, since you know that's just going to be a slutty one-night stand, but I suppose I'll never know, since I'm not a slut.

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 No.385534

>>385530

https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-common-is-cheating-infidelity-really/

https://www.metroweekly.com/2018/02/surprising-number-gay-men-say-theyve-cheated-partner/

The second link may not be as legitimate as the first one by a long shot, but I don't really doubt what it's saying. I can't tell if I should feel better that the world isn't as bad overall as I thought, or if I should just feel worse because the part of the world that I'm in actually is as bad as I thought.

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 No.385535

File: 86904477523976c⋯.jpg (8.82 KB,245x350,7:10,cloud_femboy_by_its_dark_o….jpg)

>>385532

what if that person, dressed, acted, talked like a girl and you were only attracted to their femininity, but not otherwise? as in pictured

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 No.385542

>>385535

If you wanted to sleep with a woman so damn badly, you'd sleep with a woman. Does my husband dressing up suddenly mean he's a girl? No, it means we both find him being a trap to be hot, doesn't mean I'd fuck a female.

Unless you sincerely did not know you were sleeping with a man, willingly sleeping with someone of the same sex indicates a same-sex attraction. No matter how hard you shut your eyes and wish it was straight, you know that's not the case. That male could be in a dress and full makeup for all I care but you know it's a male and you made that choice.

I've been with more than enough traps to know that they are beautiful in a way women are not and could not be. I've also been around enough desperate men to know that the attempt to hold onto your heterosexuality in spite of all evidence to the contrary (like having gay sex, of course with a prostitute) is always a load of shit. Nobody gets so low that they suddenly have no preferences at all, and any of the times I've seen a guy say "it was just because I needed a warm body," they inevitably sleep with men more in the future. That's gay. You're fooling yourself if you look at a trap you enjoy and say "well my cock is hard so magically that makes this not gay."

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 No.385543

>>385542

>doesn't mean I'd fuck a female.

mm, duh. because you're gay.

I feel that you're not entirely correct. Because, in this scenario, the person would actually be willing to have sex with a female.

If the trap presented as a guy, they'd lose all interest, whereas you would not, Because, again, you're gay.

These are two different demographics imo.

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 No.385545

>>385543

If they want to sleep with women too, they're bi. I recognized in my post that if the trap passes totally as a female and the guy doesn't know it, then that guy can still be straight, but if there's knowledge that the trap is *not* female before having sex, and the guy still goes for it, then he's bi.

Believe me, I'm not exactly enthused about guys who can't process this calling themselves gay. I'd honestly rather they stay in the closet, because it does mean more cute guys for my husband & me. With that said, I'm not going to lie and say they're straight just to spare their feelings.

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 No.385546

>>385543

My point in saying that I wouldn't fuck a female is that the reverse isn't true, i.e. I'm gay, not straight or bi, and I wouldn't sleep with a woman even if she looked like a boy. A straight man, similarly, is not going to sleep with a boy even if that boy is a trap. By definition, a straight man is interested in women, not men. He might recognize that the secondary characteristics of the trap are like women he *would* have sex with, but that trap is not a woman and he wouldn't have sex with her.

This is really simple. Guys trying to wiggle around these clear rules are really just admitting they're closeted.

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 No.385548

>>385546

*sex with him, excuse me. Does that count as a reverse Freudian slip? In any case, crossdressing or not, boys are boys. Cuteness doesn't make them female. Crossdressing doesn't make them female. Looking good enough to give you a boner doesn't make them female.

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 No.385564

My sexuality changes based on what I eat, it's hormonal. I no longer have urges to do the shit that you guys do, I used to. Maybe I'm just Het or Bi? Pretty open about being Bi, but I'm no longer sure I'm Bi.

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 No.385580

>>385525

I hear this and it can sound like that's the case but then there are gay guys like me who'd love to have monogamy with a partner. You just gotta remember not all of us gays are wanting open/poly relationships

.>>385535

It DOESN'T matter. We femboys are still MALE. MALE x MALE is a homosexual relationship. I dress like that pic (only darker colors) and it doesn't make a splic of difference. Femboys/Feminine guys are STILL GUYS. We're still MALE. And if you have attraction to guys like us, you're either gay or bisexual (if you are also attracted to females).

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 No.385618

File: ccceaf2909ebd1a⋯.jpg (18.91 KB,527x612,31:36,1436344871978.jpg)

I have been in a long-term committed relationship with a girl for several years now, and I personally struggle with my sexuality sometimes.

I have had feelings, romantic and sexual, for feminine boys, girls, and m>f trans for many years now.

I have tried to be open about it with her with varying degrees of understanding/ acceptance, but now I keep many of my personal thoughts to myself because I fear that it makes her feel insecure.

I definitely relate, and I can add that I am personally frustrated with these feelings on a fundamental level, because I feel ostracized and detached from society because on one hand I am surrounded by bigots/homophobes, and on the other I don't want to associate myself with the LGBTQ+ community because of how openly toxic it is in public and even how people of that community have attacked me based on their assumption of my cis-heteronormative-male-ness…

I feel choked up and alone and I have only even vaguely mentioned these feelings to my gf and about 3 very close friends in the past, and I regret even telling them, as I no longer associate with them.

I fear trying to reach out to other people about my issues and be painted in a certain way in the public and to my family(including gf).

I resort to lurking on /b and /cuteboys and being lewd when I am home alone.

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 No.385631

>>385618

I feel sorry for you, because you can't be yourself and it seems to affect you a lot. You can't really talk with the people closest to you, your family or even the person you share your life with and "very close" friends. But, how close are they really if as soon as you try to show the real you, you feel scared or threatened.

Is having all this worth living a lie?

"Painted in a certain way". There is nothing wrong with liking what you like. Period. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You're not defective, or abnormal or any of that.

I don't want to impose a sexuality on you, but from you say you're attracted to women (cis-/trans alike) and to "feminine boys". Fine.

Sexuality can evolve over time, I don't know how young you are, but I think it's reasonable for changes to happen in the first 3 life decades.

In this case it seems like it's been there for quite some time now.

There's also the possibility that you may want to yourself be more able to experiment with yourself in terms of being more free to appear as you like as femine boys and transgender women do, but that's maybe stretching it too far. Still, something to consider for yourself.

In general, it seems you're surrounded by an environment that you are a prisoner of. You should reach out to LGBT people and talk to them, it will help you feel better.

Like, ask them about their experiences, try to bond over common hobbies ideally, and try to find out what makes you like them and not.

But, it feels like you have an urgent need to be yourself and that's what you're missing in your situation.

In my case, I'm transgender, and having lots of contact with other people like myself helped me immensely.

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 No.385637

>>385618

Congratulations on finally coming out as bi, anon.

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 No.385713

>>385631

I know there's nothing wrong with being the way I am. I just don't want to associate with the toxic LGBTQ+ community that has in the past been very harsh and hateful towards me based on their assumptions of who I am without actually knowing me.

I don't have many friends or interact with people in public very much anymore, and I wouldn't know where to start.

>>385637

I've been bi for several years and I've came out to a few people, but regret doing it now. Been just keeping it to myself.

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 No.385729

>>385713

From what you wrote, I got the impression your immediate surroundings were much more detrimental to you than what you make out to be a scapegoat.

There is no such thing as a "LGBTQ+ community" just as there is no "heterosexual community" or "African-American community".

They are just individuals, each trying to do what they feel right. If you felt not included please don't let that deter you from making contacts with LGBT individuals.

We are each different. This being said if you approach people with prejudices prior formed to getting to know them, you will have a bad time. There is also very little compassion amongst LGBT people for conservative or racist ideologies, for clear reasons (they are a minority too).

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 No.385756

I mean I've popped a boner at a cuteboy flirting with me does this make me gay?

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 No.385767

>>385756

It's very likely, anon.

It also could be the situation where you got horny just because you've been craving so much for sex but there are no females who want to mate with you, so your head (both of them) just ends up settling for what's available. Like marines or prisoners, ya know. As Kinsey puts it, no one is completely straight or completely gay. We're all kinda bisexual with a strong lean for either side - or both sides, though as I put previously ITT, perfectly 50-50 bisexuals are just confused. I know because I was there before, couldn't just admit to myself that I was full-blown homo.

But most likely, you're a faggot. Welcome.

I remember when I was a teenager I had this fetish for turning "straight" people gay. Good times.

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 No.385785

>>385729

Fair point, but I really don't even know where to start. I am definitely not comfortable with my surroundings or the society I am surrounded by.

I only have like 2 friends, my gf, and my family. I am not open about my sexual identity or anything like that because of the heavy stigma against it and the toxic identity politics that dominate the popular rhetoric of society.

I literally don't know where to start or how to open up about my feelings. I have been wanting to talk about it but am terrified of doing so.

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 No.385807

>>385785

I don't know.

I just know that I would not feel comfortable being with someone that I can't be myself around, that I'm afraid to talk to, where even the thought of opening up makes me feel threatened. Like, come on. That makes sense right?

So, I'm not sure what I'm saying. Even if your girlfriend makes you happy, is it not a happiness based on illusions partly?

If I had a partner, ffs, I would want to be myself with them and not feel ever fear or threats from their companionship. Imagine coming home tired and stressed from whatever, and then you have to keep up a lie at home too.

That's just going to kill anyone long term, metaphorically or maybe literally. Don't be that person.

Am I saying dump your girlfriend and family? No. But, it's still no life what you're describing to be honest.

As I said, form friendships with LGBT peops over shared hobbies perhaps, join a LGBT forum on other sites.

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 No.385812

File: f0e9c3dba6a9a74⋯.png (126.55 KB,680x574,340:287,Smug2.png)

>He's confused about his sexuality

>He hasn't seen the light and became disgusted by 3DPD of all genders

Heh

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 No.385819

My advice to confused people is not to care for other people's labels which are (i) impersonal generalisations and (ii) tinged by received prejudices about what's normal, ethical and beautiful. These are almost invariably absorbed from society, uncritically internalised and then projected onto others. Nobody's ideas on sexual morality and sexual aesthetics are arrived at after deep critical thinking.

I attribute sexual confusion to hetronormativity the imperative to be straight, be gay (and subconsciously be the [i]correct[/i] gay, the [i]correct[/i] straight). It's a pointless and downright harmful exercise.

What should stay principle is your individual well-being which should never be compromised for other people's comfort (or, as ITT, an arbitrary desire for simplicity).

For questing persons in with feelings resembling those in the OP: do what comes natural, do what feels right. If it feels wrong, don't force yourself.

If you're not strictly hetrosexual, the evidence is that you should start presenting "signs" in your early teens. That doesn't mean you must know it by then but with hindsight you're likely to recognise it in your past self. I'd love to share my experiences with the board but few vocal ignoramuses here will purport to psychoanalyse and that will be even more confusing.

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 No.385843

>>385819

>I'd love to share my experiences with the board

Then do so.

>[i]

That's not how you italicise on this site.

Click on the options on the top right then click "Customise Formatting" to see how to format your posts better.

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 No.385980

>>385843

force of habit

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 No.387191

>wanna be a qt3.14 trap boi

>am tall boi

>am straight

>like traps

>3d traps i'm not so sure about

>live in aus so can't see if i like 3d anyway

I just wanna meet up with a 3d trap that is actually believable. would love to have them turn me into a trap as well. my family is very much against the idea of trans and I kinda lean that way politically as well so it's very hard for me

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 No.387394

>>385141

Stop watching porn friend. You're straight. You just watched too much porn and it put strange thoughts in your head.

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 No.387413

You will not have a clue about your sexuality until you actually start having sex.

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 No.387457

>tfw want to try sucking dick and get fucked in the bum

>also dont want to catch a collection of STDs

>have to resort to shit like fetlife to find people

>can only find literal degenerates carrying colonies of every imaginable STD in their dicks

Why are all the cute virgin traps on the other side of the planet?

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 No.387585

I have so many contradictory wants and fears and anxieties I cant help but be confused even if I know exactly what I like

im not like OP I know what I want, but I am scared of a lot of it, or only my dick wants it and my head or my heart dosnt

idk why I am posting now, I have just dealt with itpoorly for a long time but for some reason I want to post now

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 No.387820

>>385141

Life is an inspiration, OP.

Follow your charms~.

I for one appreciate a beautiful boy, but I was startled with my first experience

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 No.387821

>>387820

Love, not life*

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 No.388312

>fat virgin, almost wizard, consider myself straight

>jerk off too much so I keep my libido in line and don't become a beta orbiter to a girl who will never fuck me

>really like looking at dicks but not men

>exclusively fap to futa and traps

>fantasize about sucking dick, rubbing mine on another dick, putting two dicks in an onahole together, two dicks sounding one rod and "kissing," occasional ass related fantasy

>but it has to be a "feminine" dick, aesthetic, clean shaven, a light color, on the smaller end of the spectrum, attached to something that at least looks female

>started looking for traps to get in relationship with

>traps have just as high standards as girls, if not higher

>and most of them don't even like their dick and want surgery, I want to suck a dick that would appreciate it

>find /cuteboys/

>fap to the dick pics thread since most look really nice and you can't see the rest of the guy

>notice that people who aren't in perfect physical shape still get replies saying their dick is hot and people want to suck it and etc

>considering reducing my standards and getting into a relationship with a cuteboy to get some dick and self-worth

>but I never considered myself gay/bi because all my fap material is a really female body that just happens to have a dick on it, and outright gay porn disgusts me

I think at this point I'm just desperate for someone to have positive human contact with. My mom keeps asking if I'm gay and telling me it's okay to come out and she won't judge, but she doesn't know anything about my fetishes and I don't live with her anymore so it's not like she found my jerkoff material. All she knows is I'm still a virgin. I keep telling her I'm not, and I still want a gf, but girls don't want me. I couldn't handle the embarrassment of proving her right by bringing one of you home. But I'm getting closer and closer to being able to stomach a somewhat male appearance in my theoretical partner. If he crossdressed I think I could get off no problem, and I'd still want cuddling and dates and stuff and I could probably do that without the cross dressing and just play public appearances off as friends hanging out if anyone asked. Gay guys just seem so much more accepting of everything it's like it's my only shot at sharing my life and sexuality with someone. I have tried to lose weight to get a gf, and lost quite a bit, but I'm still fat and I lost my motivation when I realized modern women are a fucking nightmare and I'm too old now and lost my chance at having anyone who isn't a worn out single mother.

Sorry if I offended anyone I swear I have the best intentions. I just want to share my love with a person instead of a pillow.

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 No.388335

>>388312

im similar to you taste wise and I have a boyfried

I dont really care for the male form one way or the other except for the dick, I like how women look, except I want them to have dicks

but tbh it dosnt matter what he looks like too much with my face in a pillow

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 No.388346

>>388312

you're not gay, you're just prison gay. you can safely tell your mom you're not gay, just super fucking desperate.

>traps have just as high standards as girls, if not higher

cuteboys also have standards, especially with the time and effort it takes to get and stay cute, and i can assure you no one wants to date a prison gay fat fuck like yourself. would you date a girl as fat, or even fatter, than you?

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 No.413879

>>385507

i relate and agree to 2 but i'm a closeted virgin

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 No.413882

Maybe it's just the result of years of porn use, but I seem to spend as much time thinking about fucking guys now as I do girls. I feel like I should hook up with a guy before my looks decline much more, but I don't know that I could find anyone I'd be interested in around my area or that I could do so without word getting out and destroying my chances with women and making my family feel awkward. It would be one thing if I were sure I was attracted to guys, but I don't know how much of the attraction is genuine and how much is for the novelty of it.

I remember getting boners at feminine guys as a teenager and feeling guilty about it. The emo/scene kid look was popular then, and I think I also suppressed thoughts about emo boys looking cute (even if I also disliked that whole subculture). I also think vaginas look gross and fantasize about getting fucked in the ass and sucking cock (even though I wouldn't look good doing them). I'm going to try laying off the porn for a week and see if I still feel this way. I don't know if I could get into a real relationship with a guy even if he was attractive, but I think it's pretty likely that I'm truly bisexual.

>>385462

Kinsey was a pioneer, but his work wasn't the most reliable in regard to the sexual orientation statistics.

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 No.415312

File: 1fdbb92ed329e48⋯.jpg (28.56 KB,960x540,16:9,1r65phgl61ky.jpg)

>>385141

>>385143

This is honestly so familiar it hurts.

All my life I've had a subtle feeling that I had just assumed to be normal curiosity that everyone feels, but over time I became more and more confused at what 'straight' people were talking about. Things like big tits and huge asses in grade school locker room talk, while I preferred more tomboyish or androgynous physiques, and I just decided to never talk about it, ever, to anyone. Especially one of my friends at the time I thought was a bit cute. I just never made eye contact when we went to the local pool. I didn't have a crush on him or anything, but I did find him physically attractive and while he was cute, he was far from a trap or femboy or anything of the sort.

Thing is, at the time, I didn't really even realize what I was doing. I was just subconsciously suppressing every thought along those lines instantly, before I could even acknowledge it in my own thoughts. I'd get this strange fluttering feeling around some cute guy and instantly, before I could actually think "he's cute" I'd break eye contact, look at the floor, and think of something else like some kind of self-hypnotic trigger. I only started really allowing myself to process the feeling after I started going on the internet and was exposed to things that allowed some level of mental gymnastics. 'Traps' were a big start to that, but while everyone else would seem to recoil at the revelation of the dick, or even just the meta knowledge the cutie in question was a dude, I'd linger mentally as I tried to figure out why the knowledge that it was a dude somehow made him less attractive. This went on for years as my mind became more and more adept at mental gymnastics, but the entire time my understanding of what 'straight' people find attractive is, honestly, felt like trying to parse out the motivations of some animal on a nat geo documentary. I knew there was something that I just didn't 'get' and considered the idea of asking that question tantamount to suicide.

Many years later, just a few weeks ago actually, me and some close friends were getting ass blasted drunk on Everclear and orange soda, we call it a Keenan & Kill, and binge watching Sam Neil movies when, in the middle of Mouth of Madness, I said some things that they both suspected I did not mean to say out loud. I mostly blacked out after that, but I remember dancing to the generic rock music during the credits and then apparently we watched Vinland Saga while they made my hug a trash can as I muttered about how cute the Prince of Dane was between dry heaving into the basket. I remembered enough in the morning to know I had said something that I had been conditioning myself to never say, or even think consciously to myself, but had felt since puberty on a fundamental level, but my friends were discrete enough that when I asked about what I had said they refused to discuss it and avoided the topic, figuring I probably didn't want to come out of the closet in such an uncontrolled manner. The rest of that week was honestly an endless, week long panic attack as I tried to rush to process it. The next week when we met for movie night, after enough drinks to build confidence but not enough to lose coherence, I went back to the topic, and confirmed that, yes, I did come out, but that they had assumed I just meant 2d anime traps and the like. I doubled down, and a good deal of the rest of the night was spent verbally processing almost 30 years of repressed thoughts as my bi friend walked me through the definitions and terms that were entirely foreign to me, and my straight friend drunkenly apologized for using "gay" as a pejorative in middle school until I told him to stop being such a fag and made it clear that my staying in the closet for so long had nothing to do with him. He then spent a decent chunk of the night being what we called an 'aggressive ally' until I threatened to buy him Programming Socks for Christmas.

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 No.415313

File: ada3cca02197bb5⋯.jpg (43.36 KB,499x360,499:360,1589775481888.jpg)

>>415312

That morning, despite being terribly drunk the night before, I felt absolutely no hangover. On the contrary, I felt better than I had ever felt in my life. It was like I had been carrying a heavy weight for so long that I had forgotten I was holding it, and then suddenly dropped it, and felt weightless. The next day, however, I felt worse than I ever have in my life, like a part of myself had been wrapped up so tight all the blood circulation had halted and it had gone totally numb, and then was suddenly set lose again, and the feeling quickly returned, starting with pain. The part of my brain that had been suppressing these thoughts was gone, but instead it was like in its place was a mental shock. I didn't know what to do with the thought. I didn't know how to be bi, or pan, or whatever the fuck I am, I'm still trying to figure that out, but without that mental block in my brain, I started to notice more than the clean-shaven femboys my brain's mental gymnastics could twist into convincing myself was a trap. Just the other day at work, I saw a surfer-dude looking guy with well toned muscles, dirty blond hair, a soul patch, and a dark farmer's tan and found myself checking out his ass through his jeans as he walked past. He wasn't even cute, he was hot. The day prior there was a tall dude, kinda thin but average, in a tank top and sweat pants, and he walked into the store and then popped his hips to rest his hand and look at something in the store, and I found myself enjoying the way his hips swayed and his sweat pants framed his ass. These are all entirely alien thoughts to me, like some foreign entity is drawing my wandering eye to things beyond my control or understanding, and this is the first time I've just rolled with it.

Now, the guilt, shame, and instant subconscious suppression has been replaced with a constant, sickening doubt. It feels much like you describe. What if I'm just a kiss-less virgin whose snapped? What if I'm just a retarded autistic neet and everyone really does have the same kind of thoughts as me but are just more socially adjusted so they can process them? Maybe it's just a kink? But then I close my eyes and I can picture going over to my friend's place for movie night and introducing them to my boyfriend as we all get drunk and watch shitty movies while me and him cuddle on the love seat beside the couch, and I'm almost driven to tears every time because I just want to be happy with someone, boy or girl, and stop being so goddamn lonely.

I don't know if you have the same kinds of feelings or insecurities. Maybe you really are just straight but confused, and I'm sorry for just dumping this rant on your thread like some kind of schizo, but I feel like if I don't tell someone, even if nobody ever reads this, if I don't just say it or type it somewhere my head will explode.

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 No.415335

>>415312

>>415313

I feel somewhat similar to this. Thanks for posting

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 No.415357

21 m feeling like a bottom gay boy even if i like girls, i feel like when im verbally forced or convinced to being submissive by an older guy i get aroused about the feeling to surrender myself and let him control me, i like being forced to that on kik and snap sometimes so if you want to chat my kik is dumbslut12

my snap is bout426 but in more active on kik

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 No.415423

>>385141

I've been attracted to both guys and girls. For me it shifts over time. Sometimes I like girls more sometimes guys. I used to be confused about it but after a while I just said guess I like both and stopped caring. I'm pretty happy now so maybe don't think hard about it.

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