/tg/ - Traditional Games

>>304482

>napolitanke

Good taste.

Uvek se zacudim koliko ima Balkanaca na 8chan-u.

>>304484

They are good. Always pick a few boxes up whenever I go to an international market. Also tea and kvas.

Not Balkan, m8. Russian.

>>304486

I'd wondered if you were a Norse, myself. While I was over there, I discovered that chocolate morsels were a favored "family snack."

>>304486

Personally, the lemon wafers are best.

>>304514

Which is why you stick to beer and pretzels if you can't cook.

>>304516

I mean, I figured out what went wrong after the fact, and could do it just fine on a redo. I just can't bring myself to do the three hours of prep-work and clean-up again. And the rest of the group literally do not know how to cook, let alone basic food handling safety, so a group effort wouldn't be any good. Not too mention this shit is way outside of my budget.

Maybe I'll go for a redux one day, but for now I go with simpler recipes. It's a lot easier to cook than it is to bake. Too much chemistry for this DM.

W-what do you eat at your table if you can't have wheat, gluten, or soy, anons?

Snack food is basically off-limits to me, with the exception of (real) corn chips and salsa.

>>304613

semen

>>304613

>Meatomelette

It's like meatbread, but with eggs instead of bread.

>>304613

sand and some water, I guess. You could probably eat beef jerky. There are plenty of recipes out there if you can't/don't want to buy any for any reason.

>>304613

What about nuts/trail mix?

corn chips are god-tier, especially with hummus

>>304613

Peanuts and shrimp. :^)

>>304613

>stuttering like a sissy boy with an aching tummy

Boys like you get to eat my dick. Now get under the table and start stucking.

>>304667

Your friend might be a lizard in disguise. Do a perception test next time

Any of you lot serve snacks that border on (or are) outright meals?

>>305323

Oh also, anyone want a chili recipe?

>>305328

sure why not.

>>305323

My GM cooks as a hobby and uses his table to try things out on. It's not uncommon for him to be running combat from in front of the stove. He hasn't done it in a while, though, because money. Our previous group's composition contained a Purest Waifu who would bring home made desserts.

>>305328

Hell yeah.

>>304631

This is a pretty good idea. I didn't realize until recently just how fucking cheap eggs are. My brother is /fit/ and currently eats a carton a day like it's nothing.

>>304632

>homemade jerky

I hadn't considered that. Thanks.

>>304639

Lots of pre-made trail mix comes packaged with a dusting of wheat flour to prevent sticking, but hummus sounds like a god-tier idea.

>>304664

You're more right than you know.

>>304666

tfw know somebody who would actually do that if lightly pressed

>>305335

I'd call this Chrow's reward for working his ass off for us and for everyone who chose to stay/who chose to come here. YOUNG ANON, YOU CAN LEARN TO COOK.

>2 Tbsp vegetable or corn oil

>2 medium onions

>1 red bell pepper, cut into 1/2 '' cubes

>6 medium garlic cloves, minced or pressed (~2Tbsp.)

>1/4 cup chili powder

>1 Tbsp. ground cumin

>2 tsp. ground coriander

>1 tsp red pepper flakes

>1 tsp. dried oregano

>1/2 tsp. cayenne pepper

>2 pounds 85% lean ground beef

>2 cans (16oz each) dark red kidney beans (remember to drain and rinse

>1 can (28oz) diced tomatoes, with juice

>1 can (28oz) tomato puree

>salt

>2 limes, cut into wedges for a garnish (optional)

Heat oil in a large heavy-bottomed nonreactive Dutch oven (or other deep and heavy pan) over medium heat until shimmering but not smoking, 3 to 4 minutes. Add onions, bell pepper, garlic, chili powder, cumin, coriander, pepper flakes, oregano, & cayenne; cook, stirring occasionally until vegetables are softened & begin to brown, roughly 10 minutes. Increase heat to medium-high & add half the beef. Cook, breaking up pieces with wooden spoon, until no longer pink & just beginning to brown, 3 to 4 minutes. Add remaining ground beef & cook, breaking up pieces until no longer pink 3 to 4 minutes.

*Add beans, tomatoes, tomato puree, & 1/2 tsp. salt; bring to boil, then reduce heat to low and simmer, covered, stirring occasionally for 1 hour. Remove cover & continue to simmer another hour, stirring occasionally (if chili begins to stick to the bottom of the pan, add 1/2 cup water). Simmer until beef is dark, rich, & slightly thickened. Adjust seasoning as needed with additional salt.

*At this second step, you may transfer all ingredients into a large crockpot, then set it on "high" for 4 hours.

Do give this a try, and tell me what you think of it.

>>305350

Man, the limit of my cooking skills is frying up spam and setting the microwave. I don't even own a dutch oven. What the hell are you trying to make me do?

>>305357

Get a cheap one, obviously. Also, practice simple stovetop cookery with Zatarain's red beans & rice boxes. No, not trying to shill, that's genuinely what I practiced with, together with boiling eggs.

>>305350

Definitely something to try at some point, but

>2 pounds 85% lean ground beef

>2 cans (16oz each) dark red kidney beans

>large heavy-bottomed nonreactive Dutch oven

Oh, to be poor as fuck and without decent cookware. I don't suppose black or pinto beans would make a good substitute, would it?

>>305363

Actually, yes, it would do. I've substituted other beans where I lacked before. The percentage leanness is also optional, I strongly suspect. Go with what you can afford.

Your local Slaaneshi cultist has invited you to dinner.

He promises it will be awesome.

Y/N?

>>304667

>I've seen one of them kill a mosquito and smear the blood between his fingers before licking them clean.

I've heard of bugchasing but this is ridiculous!

>>305323

One of my favorite things to bring to the table is chicken crust pizza. It's cooked in the same general way as a pizza but the crust is made with a mix of ground chicken, cheese, salt, pepper, and oregano. I put it in an iron skillet and bake it for a bit until it's usable as a crust and then prepare the rest of it basically as a standard pizza. If you make it right, the "crust" can carry the toppings as well as dough and it's delicious as fuck; I like making it with pesto instead of tomato sauce, but some guys prefer the classic. Did 8chan ever have an active /ck/?

>>305441

Eeeeh… define "active".

>>305483

I checked it and it has posts that were made within the last month, so it's not completely dead.

I've done everything from Venision Pie to the Werewolf cookbook, Turkey & Chorizo stew.

I feed those boys and girls well.

But usually I'm content with pate and toast or some Brie and toast.

And Ale-lots of good, hearty ale.

>>305594

Sure thing.

>Ground chicken, pre-ground or made from ground chicken breasts yourself; I find that grinding the breasts tastes better

>1/2 cup of mozarella cheese

>1/4 cup of parmesan cheese

>3 eggs

>Salt, pepper, oregano, basil, chili flakes. I don't really measure this, so go with your gut on what looks right

>Mix that shit in a bowl and spread it on a cast iron skillet

>Bake it in an oven heated at 400 degrees Fahrenheit for 20 minutes

>Take it out and put the sauce and toppings you want on it

>Put it back in the oven for 10 minutes

Enjoy!

>>305714

What type of sausage do you favor

While I was over in Norway, I discovered that for breakfast they like sliced sheep sausage on white cheese, a slice of cucumber (or was it zucchini), and a slice of bread. Very cheap, made for a nice lean meal.

>>305743

Simple beef friend. I like it a little spicy too

>>304711

Thanks to my family I already know how to cook cutlets, dubsman.I still can't think of something tabletop gaming-appropriate.

Nothing like beer brats.

Get some bratwurst and some beer. I usually like the beers around oktoberfest. Next pour 3 to 4 bottles of beer into a large pot. Toss 4-6 brats in and bring the beer to a boil. Make sure you skim off some of the foam that build up. Once the beer reached boiling, turn off the heat and move the pot. Let it sit for ~8 hours. Afterwards, toss them on a grill and get the outside a little charred. Do not pull them off with a fork unless you want hot juices spraying on you.

Serve with grilled onions, sauerkraut, and honey mustard sauce. And don't forget cold beer.

>>305753

>Do not pull them off with a fork unless you want hot juices spraying on you.

Can't one perforate them beforehand?

>>305763

Don't perforate either. You want to keep the juices inside. Use tongs.

Our gaming group usually has someone bring a spread of veggies, crackers, & hummus for snacks, then we usually have dinner with a salad, a simple meat dish (usually just chicken & rice or whatever the host can cook up easily), and sometimes a soup or curry. Sometimes people will bring cookies or something for desert, sometimes not.

It is pretty yummy.

>>308273

How about the German dish in the OP?

Or, if you want something slow but good this? >>305350

>>308273

I'd like to see >>305350 and >>305597

>>304639

>eating nuts

lmao what a fag

>>308300

Something wrong, Eurofag?

So, what drinks do you guys like bringing to the table? I've been fond of apple cider in a variety of brands, and occasionally the odd wine.

>>312520

Looks like a heart attack on a platter. Did it taste any good?

Two things:

First, have a cookbook for cheapo military-style food: http://david.brubakers.us/cookbook/rationcookbooks.html Wanna eat like a Guardsman on a Civilized World? Look no further!

Second is vid-related. Save up just a little and get a bottle, your tongue will thank you. You drink this for the taste, not to get drunk.

>>312562

yes, the meatbread was delish - but it was also a bit much for one person

- the ground beef was well spiced and seasoned

- the cheese had good flavor to it

- and the bacon added a lot of good taste too, since its juices soaked into the bread a lot

and to think of it - I made that a year before epic meal time even was a thing

>>312564

Got the recipe?

what kind of snacks/drinks would you bring to a game under these constraints:

>low carb, no sugar

>doesn't fill the room with its smell

>not greasy

>>317769

a group member is "sensitive to smells". last time i brought jalapeno poppers stuffed with cheese and wrapped with bacon and she complained for an hour about it "smelling like bacon in here" even when they were gone. it's bullshit, she's just a moody cunt, but i'd like to avoid conflict. plus she complained about grease on something, even though i brought chopsticks to eat them with. GM's wife. good group, what are you gonna do

sausage and cheese slices on toothpicks might fit the bill, will try that.

I game with some guys who all have massive sweet-teeth and one just fucking loves caffeine, so chocolate-coated coffee beans show up alongside Sour Punch straws and Sweet Tarts. One dude loves to cook too, so we sometimes get stir-fry or homemade chicken soup.

>>317802

The obvious solution is to talk to the GM nicely about how the blob he throws autismbux at is crimping your snack style.

>keto diet works

Good to hear, I've been considering going down that road. I also hear that carbo-loading once every week or two makes it work better.

>>317818

>I also hear that carbo-loading once every week or two makes it work better.

personally i'd recommend against a carb-heavy day more than once a month if your goal is weight loss. a good diet is whatever works for you though. just keep a spreadsheet, weigh yourself in the morning once a week, and trust the numbers.

When my group is gaming outdoors, I like to make Heart Attack in a Pot (tm) for dinner.

>ingredients: ground beef, mashed potatoes, bacon, meatballs, shredded cheese, Doritos (optional)

>cook bacon

>brown the ground beef, mixing in the bacon when you're almost done

>cook mashed potatoes and meatballs

>put the ground beef/bacon into a Dutch oven, so that it forms an even and decently thick layer

>place meatballs on top of that

>layer mashed potatoes on top of this, again making sure the ingredients are layered and not mixed.

>together all of this should almost fill the Dutch oven

>spread the shredded cheese over the potatoes, to the top of the oven

>close Dutch oven, surround with coals as usual, and cook for ten minutes or until cheese is melted

>serve on plates, with optional Doritos to be used as utensils with which to eat this.

>>317847

>using hotdogs instead of sausages

Laughable

>we have a vegetarian

Even more laughable

>>317849

addendum:

>sausages

>brats

Cheers to the anon who pointed me here.

Is there a cookbook for /tg/?

If not, I propose one.

Recipes should conform to being:

>Cheap

>easily scaled to account for the amount of players

>of varying timeframes for cooking

>delicious

>low greasiness, or low contact with hands, to prevent greasy components, cards, etc

Hard mode:

>Conform to the genre or setting of the game you're playing

Dante must Die mode:

>can't be too good, lest your players focus more on the food or are only liable to return for your food.

Tell us about greasy fuckers who ruin your cards and dice, those who prefer your food to your GMing, or destruction of game pieces over spilled soup/drink. I'm thinking of making mead for a future fantasy game.

I admittedly have reached the point where I enjoy food prep as part of GMing, and also fear that my players prefer my food to my abilities as GM.

What's the most you've spent on food for a session? Was it worth it?

Would you say that a fed group of players is conducive to a better game, and that hungry players are liable to have problems?

Players chip in for food costs, y/n?

Soups and stews require only spoons and forks, but is the spill possibility worth it?

Is the greasiness of finger food worth it?

>>328502

I'd love the guide!

>>328502

Do it. I want to recreate these monstrous drinks.

>Fried chicken not being god tier

How do I avoid the greasiness?

>>328519

Pull the skin off, m8

https://warosu.org/tg/thread/28470756 What not to do with food. Do not read before eating.

And now, for the recipe no one asked for –

ANON'S LOW EFFORT COTTAGE PIE

<Shit you're going to need.

>Ground beef, lean

>Onion, and whatever other veg sounds good. (Mushrooms, celery, carrot, peas, go wild.)

>Frozen pie crusts (you could make this yourself, but this is supposed to be low effort)

>White flour

>Potato

>Butter

>Milk

>Sharp white cheddar, shredded

>Beef stock OR bullion cubes

>Worstershire sauce

>Catsup (ideally tomato paste, but let's be honest you're not going to open up a whole can just for the spoonful or two you need for this)

>Salt. Black pepper. Whatever spices sound good (bay leaves, garlic, tyme, parsley)

The quality of the finished dish correlaltes directly with the quality of the base ingredients, especially the beef. Buy directly from local farmers if you can. Basically don't be a cheap fuck.

<First, the mince.

>Brown ground beef.

>Strain off grease if you care to.

>Add vegetables, cook until translucent.

>Add beef stock or water and bullion to cover.

>Add a shot of Worstershire, catsup, and the spices.

>Bring to a boil. Reduce to a simmer.

>Throw some flour in a cup. Add water. Mix into a slurry.

>While stirring, slowly add the flour slurry into the mince.

>Cook until thickened. Set aside.

<Next, the mash.

>Peel potatoes, if you care to. Slice into even pieces for faster cooking.

>Starting from cold, boil potatoes until a knife passes through the center without resistance. Drain.

>Mash that shit up. Don't skimp on the butter. Add milk enough to bring together. Salt to taste.

>While the mash is still hot, add the shredded cheese, reserving some for later.

I shouldn't have to tell you how to make mashed potatoes, but there it is. If you try using dried potato flakes you deserve what's coming.

<Putting it all together.

>Precook the pie crust according to the directions.

>Pour in the mince mix.

>Cover with the mash. If you're fancy, you use a zip-top bag with the corner cut off. If you're not, you use a pair of spoons to dollop it out and smooth over the top.

>Sprinkle the remaining cheese over the mash.

>Throw that shit in the oven. Cook until the mash is browned and the mince is bubbly.

Note that this recipe deliberately omits hard measurements for ingredients. You're going to have to play this by ear, as God intended. I find that a pound of ground beef makes about enough filling for two pie crusts, which works out nicely.

>>317767

>>317802

Carrots, Celery, Peppers, Cucumbers. Slice them up and serve them with hummus. I know it's all carbs, but a few veggies isn't gonna knock you out of keto. Alcohol is also good, but less healthy. Also if you make dishes that you eat with a spoon, you can avoid the problem of grease.

  DRINKING SONG FROM "THE TOMB"

Come hither, my lads, with your tankards of ale,

And drink to the present before it shall fail;

Pile each on your platter a mountain of beef,

For 'tis eating and drinking that bring us relief:

 So fill up your glass

 For life will soon pass;

When you're dead ye'll ne'er drink to your king or your lass!

Anacreon had a red nose, so they say;

But what's a red nose if ye're happy and gay?

Gad split me! I'd rather be red whilst I'm here,

Than white as a lily – and dead half a year!

 So Betty, my miss,

 Come give me a kiss;

In hell ther's no innkeeper's daughter like this!

Young Harry propp'd up just as straight as he's able,

Will soon lose his wig and slip under the table,

But fill up your goblets and pass 'em around –

Better under the table than under the ground!

 So revel and chaff

 As ye thirstily quaff:

Under six feet of dirt 'tis less easy to laugh!

The fiend strike me blue! I'm scarce able to walk,

And damn me if I can stand upright or talk!

Here, landlord, did Betty to summon a chair;

I'll try home for a while, for my wife is not there!

 So lend me a hand;

 I'm not able to stand,

But I'm gay whilst I linger on top of the land!

 INNSMOUTH COOLER

 Pour one ounce of vodka into a tall glass and fill with chilled Clamato juice. Garnish with three cocktail shrimp on a cocktail spear (or, if available, use a picked baby frog or octopus instead).

 PICKMAN'S PICK-ME-UP

  ½ dark beer, ale, or stout

  ½ Champagne (dry)

 Pre-chill beer and Champagne well; pour both into tall highball glass simultaneously and do not stir.

 CAFE KADATH

 For the morning after. To a cup of fresh, hot, black coffee, add ⅔ ounce Sabra liquer and stir. Top with a spoonful of whipped cream. Dust with nutmeg.

 PROVIDENCE PUNCH

 With thanks to Baber (1483-1530), founder of the Mogul Dynasty and Emperor of India: Punch, an anglicism deriving from Urdu (Persian, Hindi, etc. lingua franca), a corruption of panj, five, because the drink has five ingredients, to wit: Arrack (a palm sap brandy), Opium, Milk, Sugar, and Rose-water. There are variants, some of which use Hashish instead of Opium.

 Baber's drink was for heroes. It moved him to conquer India. In full armor (Persian link mail, not European plate!) he swam every river he encountered in the course of his invasion. He was a master swordsman, a deadly archer – the Mongol horseman's bow was his weapon – and a remarkable athlete. While not engaged in battle, or guzzling panj, he composed poems in Persian, invented a new Persian script (variant of the basic Arabic characters, such as kufic, nastalikm shekesteh, and many others, as we have italic, roman, etc.), and composed memoirs in his spare time.

 The exact proportions of this drink are not known, but it is suggested to anyone who would like to mix up a bowlfull that the milk should be used as a base; then adding sugar and rose-water to the desired sweetness and flavor; then Arrack (or brandy or dark rum) to the desired strength; and lastly, if you like the punch you've mixed up and want to go all the way, Opium or Hashish (to strength, depending on how many are partaking).

 NIGHT-GAUNT

  1 ounce white creme de cacao

  2 ounces Parfait Amour

  1 scoop vanilla ice cream

 Blend ingredients in blender. When frothy, pour into martini glass and serve.

 CHAUGNAR FAUGN FRAPPE

 Pack a Sherry glass with shaved ice, and fill with a cherry liquer, such as Peter Heering's.

 ULTHAR ALEXANDER

 1 egg yolk

 1 ounce cream

 1 ounce gin

 1 ounce Kahlua

 Place in blender with crushed ice. When frothy, strain into glass and sprinkle nutmeg on top. Cats like this one, too. If your cat happens to be on the wagon, leave out the gin and use chocolate syrup instead of Kahlua.

 THE ALHAZRED COCKTAIL

 Abdul Alhazred, the "mad poet" of Sanaa, in Yemen, lived circa A.D. 700 to 738. After travels which took him from the ruins of Babylon and Memphis to the great southern desert of Arabia – the Roba El Khaliyeh or "empty space" of ancients, and where Alhazred claimed to have seen the fabulous Irem, City of Pillars, he settled in Damascus, where he penned one of the most tremendous occult volumes of all time, the Al Azif. This book was to see centuries of suppression, and yet survive in various translations. Even today it is rarely seen, the few copies being closely guarded.

 It was recorded by Ebon Khallikan, Alhazred's twelfth century biographer, that during the writing of the Azif, Alhazred was observed to try to relax at times by drinking a cup of liquor laced with oil of hashish. The only liquor available at the time would have been a species of rum, which had been invented in Asia before the time of Jesus.

  2 jiggers Demerrara Rume (or other dark rum)

  2 to 5 drops of hashish oil (Arabian, if available), according to strength desired.

 Drip the oil into the rum and stir carefully. Add slice of lime. If desired, ice could be added, or a mixer. Abdul undoubtedly took his neat.

THE COLOURS OUT OF SPACE

 This is a pousse-cafe (a striped drink made of various liquers floating one above the other). These drinks must be poured carefully over the back of a spoon. The liquer with the greatest specific gravity or density must be poured first. The higher the proof, the lighter the liquer and the nearer to the top it is placed in the drink.

  White creme de menthe (48 proof)

  Parfait Amour (58 proof)

  Pernod (90 proof)

 Pour in order given into a aperitif or codial glass. Drink one layer at a time.

 KLARKASH-TONIC

  ½ ounce white creme de cacao

  ½ tsp. Siberian Ginseng extract (or 1 tsp. Korean Ginseng extract)

 Pour creme de cacao and ginseng extract into a brandy snifter and fill with orange juice.

 Take before retiring at night, and see visions of Zothique before morning.

 YOG-SOTHOTH FIZZ

  2 ounces Drambuie

  Juice ½ Orange

  Juice ½ Lemon

 Shake with cracked ice and strain into a tall glass. Fill with seltzer.

 KUBLA KAN #2

 Although suppression of Aleister Crowley's books began with the closing of his Abbey of Thelema in Sicily in the 1920's, many of them are again in print and are being studied and read worldwide; thus Crowley scarcely needs an introduction. His reputation stands primarily as a scholar of the occult and as a magician (he claimed to have attained the degree of Ipsissimus), but also as a poet, novelist, world traveller, big-game hunter, mountain climber, and as an early researcher into other planes of consciousness through the use of yogic and sexual disciplines, and drugs.

 The KUBLA KHAN #2 is Crowley's own invention and is said to have considerable powers as an aphrodisiac.

 Tale equal amounts of gin, calvados, and creme de menthe. Add 20 drops of Laudanum (tincture of Opium dissolved in grain alcohol) and stir in one tablespoonful of cantharides (Spanish Fly). Add ice, stir but do not shake, and serve with straws.

DO WHAT THOU WILT SHALL BE THE WHOLE OF THE LAW.

 MISKATONIC MILK PUNCH

  2 ounces Pimm's Cup (brandy base)

  1 dash Jamaica rum

  4 ounces milk

 Blend in blender (or shake vigorously) with ice, then strain into glass. Dust with nutmeg.

 When making punch of any kind, always remember before adding liquor that hashish (oil or dry) is soluble in alcohol.

 CROW'S CLOCKSTOPPER

 Into a chilled 16 ounce glass, pour two jiggers of chilled brandy; add a lump of sugar which has been saturated with angostura bitters. Fill with dry, ice-cold Champagne. Add a spiral of Lime peel.

 VON JUNZT'S MARTINI

 Von Junzt (1795-1840), the author of NAMELESS CULTS (UNUASSPRECHLICHEN KULTEN. Dusseldorf 1839), spent his life in investigating the strange, the hidden, and the forbidden. He was admitted into many occult groups and secret societies, and he read countless books and manuscripts of esoteric lore most of which have no doubt now been completely lost. Into NAMELESS CULTS he poured all of his knowledge, with the exception of the unpublished notes he destroyed immediately before his suicide.

 Von Juntz did not invent the martini; he probably didn't even drink them. But he was said to like a dash of gin in his absinthe. By reversing the proportions, one can get an excellent martini.

  1 part absinthe (Pernod is acceptable).

  4 parts dry gin

 Stir with cracked ice, strain, and serve with large stuffed olive or cocktail onion.

 ABSINTHE COCKTAIL

 Absinthe was invented near the end of the eighteenth century by a Frenchman in Couvet, Switzerland; the recipe was acquired in 1797 by Henri-Louis Pernod. The drink which is currently sold with the Pernod label is not genuine absinthe, but is a reasonable imitation.

 Absinthe itself is now illegal in most countries including Switzerland and the United States. During the nineteenth and early twentieth centuries, absinthe earned its reputation as a drink which caused brainrot, insanity, suicide, and/or death. This may have been in part due to decadent novels such as AGAINST THE GRAIN (A REBOURS) by J. K. Huysmans and WORMWOOD by Marie Corelli, in which the decaying hero is usually sipping away at an Absinthe Drip. The strange effects of absinthe, if any, may be caused by its ingredients which include wormwood, balm mint, hyssop, star anise, fennel, Artemisia mayoris, various seeds, roots, and strong brandy which measures out to 68 percent alcohol (136 proof).

  1 dash gum spirits

  1 dash Angostura bitters

  1 part water

  3 parts Absinthe

 Shake well with cracked ice, strain into glass, and add twist of lemon peel. Serve water chaser alongside.

 ANGEL OF THE ODD

 Take a small goblet of Sherry glass and fill about one third with Port. Fill the rest of the way with Kirschenwasser, a clear wild cherry liquer. Serve.

 If you don't like this drink, blame Edgar Allen Poe; he invented it. Poe did not know his wines and liquors; he seems to have thought that Kirschenwasser was some sort of watery, weak drink, mentioning that a glass of Port was diluted by the addition of it. In "The Cask of Amontillado" Fortunato expresses astonishment that his host has been able to procure as rare a wine as Amonttilado, although it is a fairly common wine from one of the world's major wine-producing countries. Also, Fortunato says, "Luchesi cannot tell Amontillado from Sherry," not realizing the Amontillado is actually an aged Fino sherry.

 SARNATH SOUR

  1 dash Anejo rum

  2 ounces dry white rum

  Juice ½ lemon

  ½ tsp. sugar

 Shake with cracked ice and strain. Add squirt of Schweppes soda or seltzer and garnish with half slice orange and a cherry.

 ERICH ZANN

  2 ounces brandy

  1 egg

  1 tsp. lemon juice

  1 tsp. sugar syrup

 Shake with cracked ice and strain into tall glass. Add cracked ice and fill with ginger ale. Add sprig of mint and half slice of orange.

 DJINN RICKEY

  2 ounces blackberry brandy

  Juice of ½ lime

 Half fill a highball glass with ice; add lime juice and blackberry brandy. Fill glass with seltzer and add twist of lime peel.

 RHLY'EH RICKEY

  1 jigger sloe gin

  ½ tsp. lemon juice

  ½ tsp. grenadine

 Stir with cracked ice and fill with 7-Up.

 MOUNTAINOUS MADNESS

 This is actually more a dessert than a drink; it would obviously be HPL's favorite of the lot.

 This recipe is a method rather than a set of instructions. The flavors of ice cream and liquers used here, as well as the amounts, are only one of an infinite variety which could be combined choosing among one's favorites.

 Into a large dish or platter place one pint each of vanilla, butter pecan, lemon, and coffee ice cream. Surround with smaller scoops of orange and pineapple sherbet. Then pour carefully over and about the ice cream and sherbet one ounce each of the following: green creme de menthe, creme de cacao, cherry brandy, blackberry brandy, green Chartreuse, and Grenadine. Top with crushed nuts if desired, and serve with longhandled spoons. Serves 3 to 6.

 ZADOK ALLEN'S ZOMBIE

  ¾ ounce lime huice

  ¾ ounce pineapple juice

  1 tsp. sugar syrup

  1 ounce cheap whiskey (bourbon or rye)

  1 ounce gold label rum

  1 ounce Jamaica rum

  ½ ounce Demerara (or other 151 proof rum)

  ½ ounce apricot liquer

 Shake vigorously, strain into a 14 ounce glass one-quarter filled with ice, and float a splash of Demerara on top. Garnish with choice of pineapple sticks, cherries, or fruit slices. Dust with powdered sugar; serve with straws.

 BROWN JENKINS

 Into a tall glass one-third filled with ice cubes or crushed ice, pour one and a half ounces of Metaxa. Fill with ginger Ale and garnish with a green cherry and a slice of orange.

 CELEPHAIS STINGER

  1 part white creme de menthe

  2 parts blackberry brandy

 Stir with cracked ice and strain.

 DAGON'S DELIGHT

  ½ ounce Kahlua

  1 ounce vodka

 Pour Kahlua and vodka into a tall glass half filled iwth ice cubes. Fill with ginger ale.

 CTHULHU'S REVENGE

  1 ounce lime juice

  2 ounces pineapple juice

  1 tsp. sugar syrup

  1 ounce white label rum

  ½ ounce Demerara

  ½ ounce Cointreau

 Stir ingredients with lots of cracked ice in half coconut shell or large exotic mug or glass. Serve with straws and decorate with fruit slices.

  GOLDEN GOBLIN

  1 ounce Strega

  1 ounce white label rum

  2 ounces orange juice

 Shake with cracked ice and strain into glass. Add a couple of dashes of seltzer or club soda.

 GIN AND MISKATONIC

 Merely a takeoff on a traditional favorite. Rub a lime peel around the rim of an old-fashioned glass. Add a jigger of dry gin, two ice cubes, a lemon or lime slice, and fill with quinine water.

 TEZCATILPOCA TICKLER

  1½ jiggers tequilla

  Juice of ½ lemon

  Apple Juice

 Pour lemon juice and tequilla over two ice cubes in an Old Fashioned glass. Fill with apples juice.

 NYARLATHOTEP NO.1

  ½ jigger bourbon

  1 jigger brandy

  1 dash Angostura bitters

  2 dashes Cointreau

 Shake with cracked ice and strain into highball glass. Fill with ginger ale. Add strips of orange and lemon peel.

 NYARLATHOTEP NO.2

  1 jigger brandy

  1 jigger Chartreuse

  ½ ounce green creme de menthe

 Mix in large stemmed wineglass with ice cubes and fill with Seven Up. Garish with orange slice.

 RANDOLPH CARTER

  1 tsp. ginseng extract, or 20 grains ginseng powder

  1 ounce green Chartreuse

  1 tsp. sugar

 Mix Chartreuse and sugar with small amount of milk in a large snifter until the sugar is dissolved. Add ginseng. Pour milk into snifter to fill (about ½ cup).

 Drink one Randolph Carter – not more – before sleep, and you will find it immensely easier to descend the seventy steps to the cavern of flame.

 ITHAQUA FREEZE

  4 ounces Southern Comfort or peach brandy

  5 sprigs of fresh mint

 Half fill a 16 ounce glass with shaved ice; add liquor and mint, and muddle to bruise mint and mix with whiskey. Fill with shaved ice and stir until the glass is frosted. Decorate with a slice of lime and serve. Drink during thunderstorms, hurricanes, tornadoes, etc.

 THE SILVER KEY

  1 jigger Smirnoff's Silver (or other high-proof vodka)

  ½ ounce Maraschino or Kirschwasser

 Mix with crushed ice in tall glass. Fill with Seven-Up.

 WHATELY WALLBANGER

  1 ounce Galliano

  1 ounce vodka

 Shake with ice, strain into glass, and fill with cold pineapple juice.

 SHUB-NIGGURATH SUISSE

  1 egg white

  4 dashes Anisette

  1 jigger Absinthe (Pernod)

 Shake well and strain into glass.

 THE AZATHOTH COCKTAIL

  2 ounces gin

  1 ounce Cointreau

  Champagne

 Shake with ice and strain into goblet; fill goblet with ice-cold Champagne. Add cherry and slice of orange.

 Drink several of these, and you will gibber unmentionably, blaspheme and bubble at the center of all infinity.

  REMEMBER . . .

 Stock the compleat Lovecraftian bar iwth all pertinent ingredients, including a paperback set of the works of H. P. Lovecraft (to settle disputes).

 If you find yourself able to translate the Duriac script of Al Azif, you've had enough.

 If you find any of your guests standing on the bar offering to recite all of the place names from The Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath, they've had enough.

   ———

 And that's it besides a preface, which describes the one time Lovecraft was unknowingly drunk and acted normal. Kept the spelling as it was, errors and all. Some fun, some illegal, some patently shit. It is a certainly unique list with unique mixes. Enjoy.

the fanciest thing I ever made myself was some raw boneless chicken breasts I marinated in italian dressing for 48 hours. cooked it in a pyrex baking dish.

cooked them for 90 minutes, pulled them out, they weren't quite cooked thru so I ripped them apart with a knife and put them back in for an hour.

honestly kind of a waste of a full bottle of italian dressing, but it was so good when it was done me and my brother just stood over the stove and ate the entire dish like a pair of cave men. I still think about making more and putting them on sandwiches or something.

>>328709

>2.5 hours for chicken breasts

Are you certain it wasn't an ostrich that you shoved into the oven whole?

Here is a damned good recipe I learned from family that I cook every once in a blue moon.

>>fuckloads of negro beans.

>>fuckloads of salsa. Homemade is best, git gud and learn a recipe/make yer own recipe.

>>some corn.

>>some chicken or beef. Chicken works better tbh fam.

>>green onions.

>>fresh fucking garlic. Add other spices like cumin and paprika, or even ghost peppers.

>>throw it all in a fucking pot plebians. Bring to a boil, then let simmer for 3 hours. If you have a crockpot, do it for 6, and blend all that shit up. Serve as a dip with a cilantro sprig on top and a lime slice on the edge of the serving dish.

>>328718

I hope you browned the meat and deglazed the pan.

>>328711

I knew I forgot to mention something.

I cooked them in the dressing. temp was 350 I believe.

I may also be vastly misremembering the time. probably was like an hour first and 45 minutes after cutting them, maybe even less.

>>328777

Hey, I recognize that canister of chocolate from those german soldier girl comics.

>>328792

What comic is that?

>>328777

Upon a bit of digging, Mezzo Mix can be replicated with 66% Cola of your choice, 33% fanta/carbonated orange drink of your choice.

>>328777

>Any delicious country specific foods native to your country, fa/tg/uys?

American, so no.

we just have every delicious food ever invented by anyone.

>>328777

Mezzo is disgusting but my closet is full of dark and milk Scho-ka-kola.

I keep 8mm stripper clips in the tins.

https://gasthaus.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/beer-wine-list-fall-2017.pdf Here's a list of German wines, beers, and spirits bonus if you actually live in Louisville. Recommend the Schlink Haus Kabinett if you can find a good importer (Jungle Jim's has it if you live in the KOI tristate area). Any Krautfags here who can volunteer information on foods and drinks?

How about Slavs?

>>334867

just how poor is mexico if you have to make food from fucking rain?

>>334875

It's brazilian, lad

>>335257

You mean kvass?

>>335400

Now we just need gopnik dwarves. When you listen deep within the earth, you'll hear hammers pounding against anvils to hardbass.

>>312567

see >>312520

you silly git

>>304602

>And the rest of the group literally do not know how to cook, let alone basic food handling safety

I know the feeling. One of my flatmates burned rice to the bottom of one of my pans, and set fire to pasta.

Another claimed to be a "master chef" after cooking chicken dinosaurs and potato faces.

The next day I made a Sunday roast for everyone.

I did it to spite them

>>335557

You made them something humble and delicious out of spite? How'd they take it?

If I wanted to make a 40K IG ration for LARPing purpose, how would I go about doing it? What should go in? Like a general ration most troops would be issued with (in the ideal).

>>335575

They wanted it every week. I let them suffer, all the while promising to get around to it "at some point".

>>335616

Soylents Viridians are commonly found in Imperial Guardsman's rations. It's lab grown food described as "bland but otherwise filling and somewhat nutritious". Just cook up a big bowl of unflavored oatmeal. Cut in some pieces of inexpensive pre-cooked hot dogs or lunch meats if you want the "where did this bio-matter come from?" element.

If you're willing to put in a bit more work and you don't need the food to keep from spoiling until the 41st millennium e.g. you can prepare it right before you eat it/serve it, I have some ideas as to how to emulate certain foods in 40k lore.

>>335405

>>335400

No, I mean the beer that ancient egyptians drank, also made from bread but far more cloudy, thicker, and due to the nutrient abundance within it it was an actual meal supplement consumed by rich and poor, adult and child, as staples of their diets (the hieroglyph for beer appeared in the ancient egyptian words for meal, supper, offering, payment, food, gift, breakfast, jar, and beer jar.)

>>335772

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Small_beer

>>335810

Egyptian Beer was not a small beer. It was not weak in the alcohol department. Not excessively strong, but not weak.

>>304482

Never make Lazy Southern-Style meatbread. If you're going to make meatbread, go all out and make something tasty, not cornbread with meat.

>>336005

Pretending to be a retard is still being a retard.

Hey folks, I've got a new Meatbread Recipe of my own design, and, as I believe there's no other precedent for it, this is the one and only contender for the official 8/tg/ Meatbread Recipe.

Ingredients:

1 Yellow Onion(Chopped)

1-2 pounds Ground Beef or Pork(depending on how Meaty you want your Meatbread to be

2 Tbsp Vegetable Oil

1 can Cream of Mushroom soup.

2 tsp Chili Powder OR Red Curry Powder.

2-3 Potatoes, Baked, skinned, and mashed

2 Cups Shredded Cheddar cheese

Peppers, as desired.

1 oz Vinegar

1 Pilsbury Pizza Dough Roll, or enough pizza dough for 1 pizza.

1. In a large Teflon Pot or Pan put the Oil, Onion, and Ground Beef and sautee until the onions are lightly browned and the beef is halfway cooked.

2. add Cream of Mushroom soup mix, mashed potatoes, and Chili/Curry Powder. Let mixture combine and thicken. add water if it becomes too pasty, it should be Runny, but not doughy.

3. unroll Pizza Dough, and coat one side entirely with vinegar. wait 1 minute, then pour your sauce in the center of the dough, spread it out so it coats the dough evenly, leaving about a 1/2 inch of crust exposed.

4. Add Cheese and Peppers(optional) to Half the pizza. Fold the Dough in half over the Cheese and Pepper portion. Pinch the sides of the pizza closed with a fork, then cut 3 slits In the top of the dough.

5. Bake as directed by the pizza dough instructions. Take out, let cool.

6. Enjoy your Meatbread Calzone.

>>336899

>>336900

So.. rather than justify why a recipe I came up with in 30 minutes based around budgeting to be as cheap and as lazy as possible isn't top of the line, I'd rather just point out that I've already had this conversation and move on.

Simply put, a less observant person would label you as "autistic," but what they actually mean is someone who has invested so much time into a specific hobby or pasttime that they've gained a sense of superiority about it, and feels the need to browbeat anyone on the internet who is, in their mind, wrong. Now this is all well and good if you know your shit, but more problematic is the fact that I'm even able to point out all of this. Your trite, predictable behavior patterns are so unoriginal that I've decided to indicate all of this to you in hopes of it causing some change. If not in you, then hopefully in others who will see that they also exhibit some of these traits.

Now, if I had attempted to justify my choices, we'd simply go back and forth between me giving reasons for my choices and you disregarding them or mocking them through greentext as if it were some valid form of rhetoric.

Instead, since I've pointed all of this out, you're instead going to use a simple greentext one-liner about me being this assblasted about getting my feelings hurt. This is not the case, since, again, I'm pointing all of this out. I am merely BORED of this type of conversation. It's predictable, it offers only condescension instead of constructive criticism, and it imperatively leads to a single, unproductive line of conversation, one that hits as many baseless tropes and patterns as your average harem manga.

At this point, any reply you give is merely for your own sake, in order for you to have the last word. I'm not going to justify it with a reply, and am merely letting you have this conversation. You win, you get the last word. I hope it's worth it for you to have this "win" over a single poster.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrYQ8oPbYmi5UymxQUReVAQ/videos

Sometimes fact is stranger than fiction (food-wise)

>>336875

>Vegetable oil

>canned soup and pizza dough

Let me tell you how I know you're American…

>>337659

My apologies, it doesn't look like the conversion went as well as expected. Here, just have the ebook.

https://mega.nz/#!qlQnhbSY!9Lyu8UeC-yFes-NAWoBoV8Q-8PFTq5DI3kiB7BFh4Fo

Who wants a digital copy of "On Food and Cooking, the Science and Folklore of the Kitchen?" It's basically an art history textbook on food, going through all major cooking ingredients and giving you good solid info on the history and preparation on each of them. It's good for campaign food prep without having to read The History of the Potato.

I also have The Flavor Bible, which might very well be the GURPS cooking supplement. A huge reference and cross-reference of ingredients and their complimentary ingredients. It's basically an in-depth guide on what to actually make out of the scraps in your kitchen. memorizing it will make the surprise recipes in Shokugeki and other cooking anime seem rather predictable.

>>337715

>>337700

https://pastebin.com/nebGcgF9

Alright! Have them and give me your most scathing review of them.

>>337727

Fuck that, I want me some Whale Cheese.

>>337728

What the fuck would that even begin to taste like?

>>337730

…and that's the great thing about this book. P. 68, AKA the cheese chapter gives us an idea. The incredibly high fat and protein content would need a lot of time to break down and cure properly, but the liquid content is so low that you would probably actually have to add Water, probably boiled salt water, in order to let the milk curdle properly over time.

You'd probably end up with a very thick, pasty substance, filled with barely cured fat-content, if not a Hard Cheese altogether. the sheer fat and protein content by weight would basically make it a very savory cheese. you'd basically be eating Meat Butter.

>>337731

I wonder if you could cook with it like butter…

>>337737

The way I'm imagining it, it's about the consistency of Lard or processsed cheese spread, though I could be wrong.

I'm picturing a sub-tropics tribe who somehow capture a whale and her calf, tame it, and then milk her. I'd imagine this is a cheese that actually pairs quite well with fish, spreading it across the fish before dipping it in coconut shavings and frying or roasting it over a fire.

>>337731

>Meat butter

That's called pemmican

Part 2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQZj1-lSilw

Part 3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHMAoIJuiVU

Part 4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a6ApJGqJOi0

Question: Why aren't we already working on our food-based setting? This book is basically the how-to of flavor-statting exotic Flora and Fauna.

What kind of setting should we go for?

Obviously there's Dungeon Meshi, but there's also the Toriko route, where we replace leveling with ingredient-based , or Space Dandy, but exotic ingredients instead of undocumented aliens.

>>337781

Oh, not to mention the Dwarf Fortress/Harvest Moon route.

Can we test out that flavor bible thing? I've got some ground venison my old roommate gave me before he moved out and I'm not sure how to prepare it. An original /tg/ recipe seems like the perfect way to use it.

>>337665

He's an idiot. My favourite thing is:

>a recipe I came up with in 30 minutes based around budgeting to be as cheap and as lazy

Yet earlier was:

>the one and only contender for the official 8/tg/ Meatbread Recipe

He's openly contradicting himself. He's just upset that someone called him out on his pleb cooking skill.

>>337773

>meat butter

>pemmican

You don't spread pemmican like a butter. Meat butter would be a pâté.

>>337721

Do you have Flavor Bible in .pdf instead of .epub?

>>337781

Where players are required to use recipe based buffs in order to improve their stats to fight more monsters, get their ingredients and create better recipes?

Why does no setting already do this?

>>338065

Exactly. It would basically use Savage Worlds, GURPS, or another point-buy system, except we replace the EXP leveling system with found ingredients having a specific ability worth a certain number of points attached to them.

>>338033

Yep, here ya go.

http://docdro.id/4NdssCk

Poorfag Here, I've just come into possession of about a pound of ground venison, and no clue what to do with it. I was thinking of a Salisbury steak, using an excessive amount of pork fat so I've got plenty of meat drippings for a savory mushroom gravy, and some homemade mashed potatoes, but I'm open to other suggestions.

It's actually my first time eating or preparing venison, so I'm open to any advice you've got for me. Besides it being a very lean meat, and thus needs fat to be added to keep it moist unlike beef, I'm totally clueless here.

>>340494

Well you're not totally clueless then, are you? The part about the fat is one of the most important parts.

Advise chili or venison burgers. Salisbury steak would dry out the meat unnecessarily, since SS takes an inordinate amount of time to cook.

>>340528

I was actually thinking about using a homemade bread crumb mix I have and doing a milk bath and bread coating to seal in moisture, then I'd pan-fry it and use some of the leftover oil in the gravy. the coating should seal in the moisture, and pan-frying with the lid on would help contain the moisture, right?

>>341292

It's alright I suppose. I think next time I won't use sodabread for the bread however.

>>341315

How does it taste?

>>341350

pretty bland, actually, mostly you just get a slight garlicky taste from it, and a mellow aftertaste. I should've doubled down on the honey, or added salt.

Still, it'll probably be good in the pumpkin curry I'm making.

>>341315

I've wanted to get into cheese making, but it always seems to need a lot of equipment or skill to it.

Any starting tips for what you actually need/what milk to use?

>>341358

>>341358

Ok, I'm a Poorfag College student, and cheese is actually an incredibly affordable hobby. Once you invest in the necessities, half of which any good kitchen should already own, the only things you'll really need to invest in is milk and cheesecloth.

I use a large bowl, a wire-mesh strainer, and a nice large non-stick pot.

From here, it's just following these instructions, which are fairly universal for most types of cheese, the difference is certain additives and curing times:

https://m.wikihow.com/Make-Paneer-%28Indian-Cheese%29

>>341400

Have you ever had real smoked barbecue pork? I mean the real stuff, where the whole roast has gotten a dry rub, then smoked for 14 hours straight, to the point that when you take it out, the whole roast is practically collapsing under its own weight for being so tender. shredding it is like handling butter.

Now find the most tender, fatty, perfect morsel, and encase it in a crust of caramelized sugar and salt, so you get this perfect savory crunch before the fat and umami of the meat hit your tongue.

That's what eating a fairy skull tastes like. It's basically the perfect meaty little grape.

I highly recommend capturing and preparing an entire village at once, as no one can handle eating just one.

>>341595

I'm willing to bet it tastes amazing still hot with some butter.

>>341655

…excuse me for a moment, I have to get some butter and a skillet.

>>341655

>>341683

Yes. It does in fact taste amazing with melted butter over it.

>>343093

that's not a pie that's just a brown rectangle

>>343106

Semanyics, but it gets the point across faster than Baked Pumpkin Pie Filling

>>343135

Can you deep fry it?

>>344805

Since pumpkin pie filling is basically just a pumpkin-and-spice flavored custard, I assume a deep fried pumpkin pie would be prepared in a manner similar to deep fried ice cream.

>>343093

So why no crust? If you know how to do a proper pie crust it's actually really good.

>>344887

laziness. I wanted pumpkin pie filling, and I didn't want to deal with perfecting a crust.

>>350931

Oh, I'm also working on a homemade eggnog recipe, and a homemade Cajun Cheese ball.

>>351898

>drinking water with your tabletop group

All you really need is absinthe.

>>335648

lentils might work as well instead of oatmeal

>>352059

>>335648

Too many chickpeas turn everything into Nutrient Paste™.

I really like dwarves so I just munch on hardtack most of the time. My jaws and teeth are strong so I don't soak it. I enjoy the crunch.

>>352120

Just eat crusty sourdough

>>351880

Marshmallow on whipped cream and eggnog.

>>353259

is that cauliflower, or melted cheese?

>>360558

Mead masterrace reporting in

>>360561

Got any good recipes? I'm thinking of getting into it myself, but it's the long ferment involved that puts me off it.

>>360562

The Long Ferment is kinda overstated, a regular mead is gonna have maybe 2-3 weeks of vigourous fermentation and then 2-3 months of slow fermentation and then onto secondary storage or bottling.

But aside from the obvious jaoms (which are perfectly fine desert meads/spiced meads if that's what you are looking for. There is a huge variety of mead types (easily as much as wine and damn close to beer).

>What do you like

And if you are interested I cannot recommend Ken Schramm enough, but give me your taste and i'll pull something out of his boo.

>>360565

It's been cold as fuck lately, I've done more shoveling in the past week than I've done in years, and I've never even tasted mead before, but I've never wanted it more than I do right now.

>>360629

Winter is the best time for making mead (most yeasts thrive at 10-15 C). The only thing I would recommend doing different then in the video, is to get a 1.5 - 2 gallon foodgrade bucket to do the initial fermentation in.

Turn it around in 8 weeks, the Jaom is sweet which helps cover flaws (which you will have enough of at 8 weeks old) but it also, ages well. You can put most Jaoms down for less then 30 bucks and you will make 4 bottles of mead that is very drinkable.

>>360629

>>360565

I've always disliked the taste of alchohol but I'm with the other anon, this stuff certainly looks neat, ut I also always kind of loved these sort of projects.

>>305435

Inquire if his pork is 'long' or not.

>>360565

Looks complicated

>>304471

>England

>tea

Dropped.

>>365848

>tea

What, you don't drink that anymore? Yes yes, fish and chips or bangers and mash, but that's wordy.

>>365850

beats a friday night kebab.

just.

Anons, I need a Chili recipe, as well as tips and tricks to make chilli for my game group on Monday.

I'm going for a thick and chunky style, the kind you'd commission Synechdoche for art of, and is best consumed by using a large back of Tortilla chips instead of a spoon.

Preferably a milder affair, that you can mix cheese, Hot Sauce, Guac, and other mix-ins as you like.

>>360558

I'm brewing Mead myself, having made a Christmas one last year.

Missus is brewing a Strawberry & Blueberry Melomel and I'm making a simple show mead but dividing the batch in two- half will be regular mead, the other oak chipped.

It's come out a little sparkling and may require some back sweetening but I'll get there.

Once the Garage is cleared out though, I'd like to try making Bragots.

>>365982

>Chili

>Mild

>open for adding Cheese, Hot Sauce, Guac

You're describing that you want a Chili Con Carne, not a real Chili.

I have a Chili Con Carne recipe as happens:

Step 1

>Chop 1 large (brown) onion into small dice

>Cut 1 red pepper

>Peel and finely chop 2 garlic cloves

>Add 1 tsp chilli powder, paprika, ground cumin in a bowl together

(this won't be strong and will be fairly mild, add larger amounts if you want hotter and/or add chili flakes)

Step 2

>Put your deep pan/pot over a medium to medium-high heat

>Add the oil and leave it for 1-2 minutes until hot

>Add the onions and cook, stirring fairly frequently, until semi-translucent

Add

>Chopped garlic

>Chopped red pepper

>1 chilli powder, paprika, ground cumin (this is mild)

Stir until spices are dispersed through it all and then leave it to cook for another 5 minutes, stirring occasionally

Step 3

>Crumble 1 beef stock cube into 300ml hot water and stir until dissolved

>Add 500g lean minced beef to the mix and brown it

Step 4

>Pour the beefstock in

>Pour 1 can of diced tomatoes in

Step 5

>Bring the whole thing to the boil, give it a good stir and put a lid on the pan, then turn down the heat to medium-low until it is gently bubbling and leave it for 20 minutes

Step 6

For richness

>Add a few tbsp's of butter at the end and stir in until melted

OR

>Add one or two bits of dark chocolate and stir in until melted

If you want more liquid add more beefstock. If you want that liquid to be thicker put in a thickener like flour or something, though the dish as is won't be runny. Recommend serving with fresh, hot cornbread and/or over some homemade mac and cheese, but corn chips is fine if that's what you want.

>>365851

I fucking love Kitchen Nightmares

>>351931

Son, only goths, hipsters, and Frenchmen drink absinthe.

Real men drink whiskey and vodka straight. Mix it up with mead if you want to feel like a Viking or rum if you want to feel like a pirate.

But really, just save your money and get a case of beer.

>>365851

How the actual fuck can you be that negligent

>>368013

Whiskey has a long history in the US. Besides being popular to drink, it was even used as a form of currency in some places. Now imagine what happens when the government tries to tax whiskey not even 20 years after the US declared independence. You know, the whole taxation without representation business. That caused the Whiskey Rebellion. So yeah, 'murican thing.

That said, I like my bourbon and most other drinks. Not too fond of Absinthe.

Going to make an old fashioned later tonight and add some moonshine cherries to it.

Would Chimera meat be edible? Would it taste like a tasty mixed blend or some ghastly toxic mash?

>>368750

Edible, yes, Palatable, no.

This is why I love /tg/

I tried Boris's kotlet recipe. It was pretty good.

>>368750

I'd think that the meat tastes like the section it comes from. Like if your chimera has the head of a goat, the body of a lion and a snake for a tail the head would taste like goat, the body like lion and the tail like chicken. The transition areas would be really weird and I'm not really sure how more homogeneous chimeras might taste.

>>317767

Roasted beans. Soy beans work, chickpeas work better.

Drain a big can of beans well, add a tablespoon of olive oil and whatever spices you want and pop them in the preheated oven at 200C until they're nice and crispy (shake pan every 10 min or so), afterwards toss them with whatever spices you want (I recommend smoked hot paprika and salt).

Usually something I can leave in the fridge a day prior then finish in the oven as people walk in for maximum taste. Lots of meat and pizza breads.

Also crockpot stuff, taco meat, roast and potatos, meatloaf, anything like that really.

>>368001

And writers. Though you'll have to erase half of what you've written if you write while drunk on absinthe.

>>393502

ur a saturated fat

im lmfao at ur life rn

>>393502

Healthy food is for when I'm by myself. Bad food is for groups.

>>393502

Try it anyway, if you're still here. Might not be my tankard of radler, but it might be someone else's.

>>393479

Examples?

>>304471

>English food being Tea

>Not Fish and Chips or even a Curry

You don't know us at all.

Try making a Lasagne without white sauce and using Pak Choi and pepper between each sheet of pasta. I'm not exactly a culinary genius, but I can make anything into an edible dish.

Going out to get food for a quick meal in a bit, might take some inspiration from this thread, thanks guys.

>>396978

>you

>whining over a polandball comic

Shiggydiggydoo, m8.

I'm of the opinion that the beef pot pie is the best food known to mankind. Preferably made with tea biscuits for the crust rather than actual pie crust - make them separately, slightly undercooked, then assemble them on top of the pot pie's fillings, upside down to keep the crisper side close to the fillings.

>>396978

>or even a curry

Goddamn, dude. If only you could see from the outside in.

>>397449

But curry is delicious.

>>397478

>the one good-tasting British dish is not even British

>>397480

That is true.

>>397478

>>the one good-tasting British dish is not even British

But this is wrong, the Chicken Tikka Masala was made by the British.

>>397507

No one's sure of it's origin. And even the stories that point to it being made in the UK say it was made my migrant communities rather than native UK people themselves. It's a foreign dish.

I love making bread for my group. Usually quick breads like zucchini and beer bread, but sometimes I up my game and make crazy braided yeast abominations.

>>412489

Isn't human flesh one of the worst sources of nutrients, to the point that wild animals won't eat it unless they're starving?

>>412501

Animals are optimized for competitive predation anon

Why eat the nutritious skin, if you can go for guts and livers instead?

Why eat meat, if you are capable of gnawing apart the bones?

One unique human trait is that you can use cooking and preservations to EAT EVERYTHING. Even boil the bones apart, to get the nutrients that would otherwise not be salvageable.

And the skin is pretty nutritious. But its also harder than the interior, because its suppose to be hard to pierce and shred to protect the innards.

If you where not familiar with dogs and bones(gnawing apart bones to eat the nutrients inside), you wouldn't think bones where a valuable source of nutrients either anon.

WTF

>>412503

Doesn't the garbage we eat have an impact on the quality of our bodies?

>>412511

I don't truly know son.

But I'm sure if you eat enough pussy you'll find out.

On an unrelated note, I'm curious as to why so many recipes seem to have an overabundance of ingredients? Like does the average cook buyout the supermarket or is this generation of "foodies" provably retarded?

>>412549

It's to have enough food for your family/guests.

>>412559

It wasn't a question asked with regards to portions, anon. They mentioned ingredients, because no dish needs 30 different seasonings to taste good. It's like playing with paints: if you mix more than 4 colors, you made mud. You put in more than 4 seasonings and you muddied the flavors.

>>412987

I think there's nothing wrong with over spicing food for the sole purpose of making foods on the verge of expiring edible. The issue is making a dish with the intention of serving guests like all of these dishes here, and dumping the contents of your spice rack into it. I make goulash once a month or so. I'm familiar with cleaning out a fridge into a crock, but I'm not gonna pretend it's a dish that should be shared with guests. Neither would I pretend it'd impress anyone who ate it (and all I really add is salt, pepper, and garlic).

I think there's another statement that could be brought up here. Something like spaghetti and meatballs is two separate dishes combined, and therefore would skirt the 4 seasoning generalization. I would think something that needs to be prepped from the rest of the dish would be okay to have its own spices. Meatball: salt, pepper ,cumin/thyme/paprika, and anise. Spaghetti: salt, garlic, oregano, and cracked pepper. Even then salt and pepper are shared between the two dishes.

Polite sage since we've deviated from the mission of the thread.

>>411279

>balking at beans

>in a chili recipe

Excuse you.

Anyway, made some delicious stuff in the past couple days with my cousin, being beef bolognese and cuban pork over beans and rice. Anyone want the recipes?

>>413329

>Anyone want the recipes?

Do you really have to ask?

>>413329

You don't need to ask permission to post things here.