No.5999 [Last50 Posts]
____________________________
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No.6000
>Heard, who is openly bisexual,
Well that explains it. Most bi people don't even fucking want to get into relationships I'd know, no shit they were only married for 15 months.
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No.6001
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3610696/PIERS-MORGAN-52-years-old-Johnny-s-time-start-acting-like-turn-fat-old-lonely-weirdo-like-hero-Brando.html
>Depp's mother passed away a few days ago
>His wife of 15 months files for divorce, seeking alimony
>Gets attacked by the media and Piers Morgan and the divorce isn't even final
JUST FUCK MY SHIT UP
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No.6002
>3DPD
>even once
maybe these retards will finally learn
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No.6009
The plot thickens..
>Amber Heard accuses Johnny Depp of domestic abuse
And he's trending on Twitter. Hope that Judge isn't a SJW.
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No.6010
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No.6016
Reposting what I said in the /pol/ thread:
I just see this as yet another testament to the strength of meme magic.
Alimony/contested divorce, aka having one's "shit fucked up", is one of 8chan's most popular memes. There's even an active /just/ board that is only second to /bane/ as far as boards dedicated to a single meme go.
Johnny Depp is a liberal hollywood celebrity that has lived a life of godless degeneracy. As can be expected, his career began to slow down with age, and he began to lose his relevance. In response, he marries a bisexual slut and does a string of terrible projects, like Transcendence and Tusk.
But the lowest point of Depp's midlife crisis was when he stooped to do a Funny or Die skit that serves no purpose but to insult and defame Donald Trump. While Depp and Will Ferrell probably thought it was all fun and games, they had no idea that they had placed themselves in the path of an intense memetic warfare. Insulting TGEoM the way that Depp did is comparable to the denial of the Holy Ghost in Christianity. And not a month later, what happens to Johnny Depp?
>His mother dies
>His wife divorces him.
>Takes $400 million
>Claims he abused her
>Will likely get away with it all
This is a judgement from Kek. Blaspheme what is clearly his will and you will be cast into the JUST league.
>Just like Rosie O'Donnell
>Just like every republican candidate sans Carson (who stayed in the Emperor's light)
>Just like Scott Weiland
>Just like Patton Oswald
This whole thread almost sounds like a cautionary tale from the bible.
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No.6024
>>6016
>This is a judgement from Kek.
FOOLISH HERETIC
Do not presume to speak for Kek. He is far beyond your puny human moral values. You would never have a hope of even beginning to understand Kek's thought processes.
The truth of the matter is that Kek does it for the lulz.
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No.6025
>>6016
>This whole thread almost sounds like a cautionary tale from the bible.
Oh, come on. What did ever Brendan do to deserve this?
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No.6038
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No.6058
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No.6059
>>5999
Another addition to the /just/ empire
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No.6060
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
ANOTHER ONE BITES THE JUST
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No.6066
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No.6415
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No.6422
>>6016
>Blaspheme what is clearly his will and you will be cast into the JUST league
Let it be known.
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No.6423
>>6422
>My twitter has become so powerful that I can actually make my enemies tell the truth.
HE KNOWS
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No.6424
>>5999
>ANOTHER ONE BITES THE JUST
Does anybody want to rewrite the song to make it JUST right?
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/queen/anotheronebitesthedust.html
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No.6429
>>6422
Has any single person ever indirectly JUST'd so many people in such a short amount of time?
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No.6460
>>6424
I'm about halfway done - I'm having a hard time re-writing the end because it's practically in JUST territory as it is
Oh! Let's go!
Brendan walks on down the street
With his gaze down, shoulders low.
Got no money, just a man in the street
Payments ready to go.
Is your money, hey, is it ready for this?
Are you hanging on the edge of your rope?
Out of your brain the bullets rip
…sick of beatin your meat!
Another one bites the JUST
Another one bites the JUST
And another one gone, and another one gone
Another one bites the JUST
Hey, I'll get your money, too!
Another one bites the JUST
How do you think I'm going to get along
Without money when it's gone?
You took me for everything that I had
And kicked me out on my own
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No.6465
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No.6557
>>6000
Why would anybody get into a monogamous, one-sided contract with a bisexual? They are known for being promiscuous degenerates.
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No.6579
>>5999
>>6422
ALIMONY ALL WHO INSULT THE EMPEROR!
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No.9177
 | Rolled 62, 61, 61, 37, 16 = 237 (5d100) |
Another one bites the just!
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No.9180
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No.9203
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No.9216
Why does every man who gets the JUST treatment have a shitty haircut?
Is it just how our world is? Shitty haircut = alimony?
How do I know my haircut is shit?
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No.9260
>>9216
That begs the question, does Brendan know?
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No.9261
>>9260
>Gondola hat
>the legs can be used as a scarf
>gondola observes the world as you walk around
fund it
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No.9262
>>9261
Send the idea to Brendan, then he can start a gondola product line and make tons of money to pay off his alimony
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No.10429
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No.10431
>>9262
>inb4 /just/ fulfills the mission of unfucking Brendan's shit with gondola hats
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No.10445
Another said: 'Johnny Depp appears to have taken ALL the drugs.'
Others chimed in: 'Is Johnny Depp drunk? Or stoned? Or ill?' and 'Johnny Depp is either high, drunk or both.'
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No.12873
>>9203
Why isn't this a banner?
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No.13675
| Rolled 64, 80, 42, 52, 78 = 316 (5d100) |
J U S T
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No.13677
>>13675
I don't trust any man who wears more than 3 accessories (hat, watch, glasses).
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No.13857
Owwwwwwwwchhhheh
https://www.rollingstone.com/movies/features/johnny-depp-lawsuit-marriage-w521671
It's like reading an interview with the arch fedora swordmaster. I can't. It's too JUST.
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No.13858
>>6025
Brendan is like Job, God (in this case Kek) is testing him. He was taken to his lowest point, only for him to be raised back up. That was his purpose, to give us someone to pity, only to admire as he rises again.
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No.13883
>>9203
this needs to be a banner
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No.13890
| Rolled 58, 41, 4, 36, 23 = 162 (5d100) |
>>13857
Fucking WEW lad!
Is his shit fucked more than Brendan's?
Is it possible?
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No.13891
He probably got with that bisexual chick hoping for some threesome action, but he ended up being the one getting fucked lol
JUST
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No.13895
He looks like he has aids lmao
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No.13896
"I kept trying to figure out what I'd done to deserve this. I'd tried being kind to everyone, helping everyone, being truthful to everyone." He pauses for a moment. "The truth is most important to me. And all this still happened."
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No.13897
| Rolled 77, 75, 89, 39, 45 = 325 (5d100) |
I'm going to have to post this to /pol/ phWEWLAD >>13857
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No.13898
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No.13899
>>6010
I’d take a knee for her after she rids herself of that thing.
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No.13915
>>6010
The alimony curse strikes again!
I bet she's friends with Afton as well.
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No.14015
| Rolled 72, 23, 87, 41, 87 = 310 (5d100) |
Johnny Depp’s Legal Woes Just Keep Getting Worse
In a new complaint, location manager Gregg Brooks says that Depp punched him twice in the ribs before saying he’d give him “$100,000 to punch me in the face right now.”
https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2018/07/johnny-depp-lawsuit-gregg-brooks-punching
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No.14016
| Rolled 95, 21, 99, 70, 67 = 352 (5d100) |
>>13915
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No.14102
'I THOUGHT IT WAS FLU' Make-up artist given £5k by Johnny Depp after losing toes to meningitis and sepsis
Doctors gave her a 10 per cent chance of survival and she was placed on life support when she developed deadly septicaemia and septic shock
A MAKE-UP artist lost her toes after the flu turned out to be deadly meningitis and sepsis.
>Billie Watkins was working with Johnny Depp on the new Fantastic Beasts film when she became ill with flu-like symptoms.
https://www.thesun.co.uk/fabulous/6842866/johnny-depp-makeup-artist-loses-toes-from-meningitis-sepsis/
Did Johnny give her the meng?
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No.14111
>>13675
>>13890
>>13895
>>13898
>>14015
>FUGLY
Well at least he's self aware
kek
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No.14114
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No.15073
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No.15075
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No.15076
| Rolled 15, 69, 48, 1, 96 = 229 (5d100) |
HAHAHAHA THE BITCH DESERVED IT NOW JOHNNY IS ALL MINE
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No.15079
>>15073
>>15075
>Johnny Debt tries to invest his remaining JUSTbux into cryptocurrency
Crash in 3…2…
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No.15083
>be mega rich Hollywood pussyman
>get mega pussy
>you can have every pussy you want
>make skit insulting Emperor
>get justed beyond all recognition
>your drunken self is booted from playing Jack Sparrow anymore
JUST FUCK EVERYTHING
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No.15329
Sounds like he needs to change his name to johnny deppendant ex-wife
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No.15349
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No.15623
More like
Johnny Deppression
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No.16218
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No.16220
>>15623
More like
Johny Debt
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No.16288
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No.19259
Johnny Depp is accusing Amber Heard of beginning a romantic relationship with Tesla founder Elon Musk “no later than one month after” she and Depp married in 2015.
The claims come from the 55-year-old’s defamation lawsuit against Heard, 32, in which he is seeking $50 million in damages after the Aquaman actress wrote an op-ed characterizing herself as a domestic abuse victim.
In the lawsuit obtained by PEOPLE, Depp claims Heard received “late night” visits from billionaire businessman Musk at the L.A. penthouse Depp and Heard shared while Depp was out of the country. Depp goes on to claim Musk was granted access to his home the same night Heard “presented her battered face to the public.” His lawsuit alleges Heard’s domestic violence allegations against Depp were false and “an elaborate hoax.”
Heard’s attorney, Eric M. George said in a statement, “This frivolous action is just the latest of Johnny Depp’s repeated efforts to silence Amber Heard.”
“She will not be silenced. Mr. Depp’s actions prove he is unable to accept the truth of his ongoing abusive behavior,” the statement continued. “But while he appears hell-bent on achieving self destruction [sic], we will prevail in defeating this groundless lawsuit and ending the continued vile harassment of my client by Mr. Depp and his legal team.”
Reps for Musk did not immediately return PEOPLE’s request for comment.
Depp and Heard met on the set of 2011’s The Rum Diary and were married from Feb. 2015 to May 2016.
The actress filed for a domestic violence restraining order against Depp in May 2016 after she accused him of abusing her. Depp denied the claims, and the former couple settled their divorce out of court in August 2016 for $7 million, which she donated to charity. Both actors signed NDAs barring them from discussing their relationship publicly.
Heard and Musk were first linked together in 2016. The two first broke up in August 2017 due to their busy schedules but rekindled their romance in January 2018 only to split for a second time a month later.
Musk stepped down as chairman of Tesla in October 2018 after charges were brought against him by the Securities and Exchange Commission, according to CNN. While he remains CEO of the carmaking company, Musk was fined $20 million.
https://people.com/movies/johnny-depp-claims-amber-heard-relationship-elon-musk-one-month-after-marriage/
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No.19261
>>19259
>Depp claims Heard received “late night” visits from billionaire businessman Musk at the L.A.
JUST CUCK MY SHIT UP
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No.19270
>>19259
Musk should banish this succubus into the sun.
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No.19272
>>19270
How come musk hasn't been justed yet? He seems like the prime victim of the alimony succubi with all the shekels hes got.
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No.19275
>>19272
I was about to ask the same thing!
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No.19276
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No.19283
>>19276
>the justed tries to just the juster
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No.19285
>>19272
He got a hair transplant, thus becoming immune to physical as well as metaphorical JUSTing.
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No.19286
>>19283
>A movie I was attached to recast my role. I had just shot a two-year campaign as the face of a global fashion brand, and the company dropped me. Questions arose as to whether I would be able to keep my role of Mera in the movies Justice League and Aquaman.”
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No.19289
>>19272
>Married 3 times
Smart enough to sign a prenup maybe, also the first one ended before he was as big as he is now. His first child died of SIDS if that counts for anything. Also the rest of his 5 children were all conceived by invitro-fertilization, first a pair of twins and ten triplets., I guess you can make something of not being able to do the job? I don't know.
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No.19293
>>19286
>JUSTice league
Meme magic?
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No.19477
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No.20087
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No.20088
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No.20089
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