/monster/ - The Last Bastion of Romance

I'm pretty sure monster are VERY penatrable

Pack up and go through the woods. Use the trip as practice for sneaking and lookout as well as building physical skills.

Your parents will expect you to take the fastest route. Take a detour and hitch a ride to a settlement nearby Randhiem, lay low there for a few days while your parents widen their search area then proceed to Randhiem.

>>398581

Being a sneaky bastard will help a lot

Practice sneaking by feeling up any boobies you find in the woods.

>>398574

go through the woods, use that time to practice your stealth skills.

FFS, you're a thief now. Steal a horse, loser, duh

Go skulk through the woods, practice staying in the shadows. Sneak past the inevitable monster girls there.

Guys, he's not a thief just yet, he needs to build his skills still. I say trek the forest or take a detour, but by the gods just learn how to not stick out first

>>398574

I'll go with the woods, since anons mentioned it's good sneaking practice.

>>398574

Go through the woods all sneaky like

>>398574

take the detour through the woods, become one with the forest, become a silent death, if you spot a wild animal that isn't dangerous, practise by sneaking up to it without it noticing and then scaring the shit out of it by screaming very loud, it's good training and very funny to boot.

“Holy shit.”

The stone actually worked. A flood of ideas, comments, actions and concepts pour into my mind. I blink a few times trying to clear my head and focus on the present. My uncle grins knowingly.

“Are you really just giving this too me?” I say “Magic like this could sell for thousands of barrons on the market and-.”

“Course I am,” says my uncle, cutting me off with a dismissive wave “I got enough to retire on already. Sides, even if disaster strikes sis, well your mom, she could pay to have this whole farm demolished and rebuilt ten times with just pocket change. Not like she'd let her own flesh and blood die in the gutter is it.” He gets up, ushering the two of us out to his porch. “Speaking of sis, how long before she knows your gone.”

“A few days at best.” I had taken a trip north to escape my parents. Told them that I had been in contact with a captain up there who wanted to offload his goods at a fantastic price. They had sent the usual entourage with me of course. Guards, servants and coachmen. I waited until I was a days walk from my uncle's farm then slipped away at dusk. Even if they rode at full pelt it would take my escort three days to reach any part of the intelligence network commonly refereed to as the merchant guild. Unless one of them had secretly been a mage, then I was in real trouble.

“That's not long,” he says “Well naturally I won't say I saw you. But they'll figure out you came this way right quick. Your parents will send the best in the business. Got a plan yet?”

I gazed out at the rolling hills and plains that surrounded uncle's farm. There were other buildings visible in the distance. Inns for weary travellers, more farms, possibly even the homes of nobles retired to the countryside. The stone grew warm in my palm. I could steal a horse. If I was going to be a thief then the sooner I stopped playing pretend and actually stole something the better.

Alas, I realised with a depressing return to reality, I'd have no idea how to ride a horse were I to get one. I was the son of a merchant for the goddess sake. Being seen on horseback was for soldiers and paupers. Up until yesterday I’d had a private carriage to ferry me around the country. Amazing how a skill that for my whole life had seemed pointless was now sorely missed.

“I'll go through Farron Wood,” I say “The stone has a point, I need some practice. No point rushing straight to the Demon Lords castle unprepared.” I thought for just a moment “I'll need a map too.”

Uncle produced one as though he had been waiting for me to ask that. It slid nicely into the side pocket of my backpack.

There wasn't any need for words after that. A quick handshake that turned into a hug and I was away on my adventure. Down the hill to the woods waiting below.

>>398664

I bet that campsite is a monster of some sort. Usually I'd suggest avoiding it entirely, but getting caught here will be a lot safer than getting caught in the castle and you need to practice with actual mamono.

There's also one thing I can think of that would make such odd smoke. I bet it will be a witch or dark mage. There could be a useful potion that you can nab for experience.

Sneak in and see what it is

If there are boobies, grope them.

>>398664

Find a tall tree nearby, unless it doesnt have leaves (unlikely if it's summer) you can hide in it while also using it to see what is at the source of the smoke. Since the smoke hanged colors, it's likely related to something magical. Be cautious.

>>398672

Palanigger, please

>>398664

>>398673

>>398675

carefully inspect, if it has boobies, sneak up to it like you did with that fox, grope the boobies, and slide back into the night

if it doesn't have any boobs however, just watch it from a distance

>>398678

I should also add that comkng up with a fake identity will prove useful. Just be sure to keep your story straight and simple. Don't claim to be a high ranking noble or some amazing warrior or any profession that requires a ton of skill. Joe the woodcutter just passing by draws less attention than Albarst noble of the Rose Consulate looking for the lands finest harvest of spices. Actually, unless you have a hatchet or saw, probably shouldnt say you're a woodcutter either. A fisherman might work if you aren't too far from water.

Let's go full sex maniac and sex everything with a hole and a pair of breasts. Also carefully investigate the smoke.

>>398678

>Palanigger, please

Someone has to do it.

>>398684

this

Where there's smoke, there's theftables. Go get some more practice, and some dinner that doesn't suck

>>398664

Cautiously investigate and then go from there I'd say

The stone didn't offer any opinion on which town I should head for. Perhaps it too was distracted by the multicoloured smoke. Checking it out did seem like a sensible course of action. I deposited my belongings inside the tent and began to creep through the woods, putting into practice what I learned throughout the day.

Daylight was almost gone now and no one could spot me in this darkness. No one that is, except for a monster who could see in the dark. Did those exist? It seemed logical that they would, monsters were nothing if not varied.

My parents didn't approve of monsters and so growing up I didn't spend much time around them. Sure I had exchanged pleasantries with monsters, or discussed shifting market prices with those in the guild. Yet all considered I was quite ignorant of their behaviour and capabilities. I made a mental note to learn more before arriving at the demon lords castle.

>>398686

Oh. It seemed blindly obvious now that the stone had suggested it. I couldn't help but feel like an idiot. Of course I needed an alter ego. Travelling as the heir apparent to the merchants guild would get me caught in no time. But what occupation could I take and fake? I took another note, there wasn't time for a solution now. On the trees ahead I could see the warm glow of firelight. The smoking camp-site was close.

Creeping up to the camps borders would be risky. But who at this time would be looking up? It didn't take me long to find a suitable tree to climb. An aged oak with a thick trunk and plenty of low hanging branches. My merchant peers would never have been able to scale it, most of them were fond of both food and sedimentary lifestyles. I'm no chiselled Adonis myself, but swimming and fencing had kept me in shape.

It didn't take long to clamber to the tree tops. Here, hidden among the leaves, I could see the camp-site below. There was no tent, only a simple bed roll and crackling fire.

The clearing held only a single occupant. Kneeling before the fire, pink furred tail twitching behind her, was a cat girl. I hold my breath, suddenly nervous she might have noticed me. But all her attention is fixed on the fire before her. Even her feline ears are angled towards it. The only movement is the occasional twitch of her tail.

The view from the tree is great. The way she keeled, her curves framed by the firelight was… Wait. What the hell was I thinking. The stones mutterings about breasts must be rubbing off on me. I couldn't even see those from this angle, for the goddess sake.

Besides ogling monsters wasn't going to make me a better thief. I think.

Above the fire place, holding the cat girls rapt attention, was a collection of beakers and test tubes. Each filled with a different colour of bubbling liquid. My inner merchant ran some quick calculations. The collection was glass and from this distance looked handmade. Therefore expensive. Yet it was also glass. Fragile and hard to transport. Plus without the merchant guilds connections I'm not sure how I'd find a buyer for something so niche.

It would also be wise to steal something she isn't looking directly at.

Over by her bed roll I can see a bag of coins. Currently I’m carrying only 80 barrons. A decent amount, but no matter how frugal I am it will run out long before the Demon Lords castle. Some extra liquidity wouldn't go amiss.

On the other side of the clearing I can see two sealed test tubes. One filled with grey liquid, the other pink. I've no idea what they do or how valuable they are. Yet they're out of the cat girls sight line and thus pinch-able.

What should I try for, the coins or the vials. Alternatively I could go interact with her. Leaving is another option, albeit not an exciting one.

>>398804

Time to practice our sneaking and bullying skills: creep up behind her as quietly as possible and loudly ask her what she's doing

It'll all work out, trust me

>>398804

>>398808

bullying a monster might not be the best course of action, who knows what its capable of, maybe it can teleport? we should not go too risky, just grab the vials, they seem more valuable than cash, and if we can't figure out what they do, we can probably still sell them for money. the fact that the money is right next to her bed roll means that she'll notice it's dissapearance sooner, making it far more dangerous of a choice.

>>398804

Most people have money so you'll likely run into another chance to get money, but not many people can make potions. So stealing the potions would probably be best.

However, you know what could be more useful? Knowledge on how to make potions. We don't have any idea what these things do, but she probably knows how to make something that can help you, and could teach you how to make it yourself. Steal the potions while she isn't looking, but then reveal yourself. Be friendly, show interest in her potion skills, maybe return the potions to get on her good side and do what a merchant does best: cut a deal.

Because being capable of making invisibility potions could be really helpful. And if she doesn't know any such potions? You could probably just learn how to make a potion that you could sell for money.

>>398804

sneak up on her and get a feel of those tiddies.

Swipe the potions, if one is invisibility, time to honk some Hooters.

>>398814

no tits, it is too soon for that

>>398817

no tits, not yet, what if MC is actually stupid enough to listen and do it.

HEY DOUCHEBAG, DO YOU HEAR ME, DON'T GROPE THOSE BOOBIES, DON'T YOU DO IT

it's reverse psychology, if we tell him not to, he'll probably do it

>>398804

A cat, huh? While it is important to test your skills, interupting an alchemist doing experiments in the middle of a forest doesn't sound too wise to me. But honestly there isn't much of a choice in the matter.

>>398813

This isnt a horrible idea, if you're brave. Keep in mind that youre dealing with a weirdo who brews potions in the middle of a forest. No telling what she's up to, but it can still be a boon for you.

Also, Stallion or whatever that little outpost was called doesn't seem like a bad idea, especially if you never seen it on any other map. Be suspisous if the feline apothecary is eager to take you there.

>>398814

>>398815

>>398817

>>398818

There is a time and place for everything, but this is neither then nor there.

Honk. Cat. Hooters

I hope we have enough stamina cause Isay let's seduce her and fuck her into a coma then once she's out cold steal her stuff. And your damn right we're gonna honk some BiG FAT CAT TATS. Also, be sure to use a fake name and occupation.

>>398810

>>398816

>>398818

Lol, I just noticed the samefag samefagging. Go back to 4um, underb&

Club her and steal her shit while she's out. Maybe cop a feel or something.

It's too early for waifu-ing.

>>398857

Is it wifu-ing if we hit it and quit it?

>>398880

>He doesn't understand /monster/s

>>398804

Sneak up close before introducing yourself and ask what she's doing.

Climbing down a tree is easier than going up, but it still takes time. Time I used to ponder what a horny, tits centred rock this mind stone was. Seriously, did it like breasts because they too were spherical. Should I leave it alone to rub one out. Perhaps find it a nice water smoothed lady rock.

Although maybe there was a method to its madness. Sneaking right up to a monster like that and copping a quick feel would be a great test of my skills. I'd need to get good at sleuthing near monsters anyway if I wanted to retrieve my inheritance from a castle full of them. Besides, I'd never actually…

Regrettably the stone hadn't provided me with any advice on what I should do after, when the likely pissed/horny monster notices my hands around her breasts. In my opinion there were only two types of crooks, those with escape plans, and those rotting in jail. So what could I use to bail afterwards? Maybe the magical vials I was going to swipe would hold the answer. One of them could be a potion of invisibility for all I know.

>>398849

Ok, what? By my own admission I'm no monster expert. But even I know semen strengthens them. Might as well try to drown a fish in the sea.

Slowly I crept to the edge of the clearing. I felt a lot more vulnerable down here among the foliage. The cat girl was still focused on her brews though, slowly feeding a powder into one of the frothing beakers.

Sneaking into the centre of the camp was much easier than manoeuvring through the forest. There was less detritus to dodge here. A giddy sensation runs through me, being right next to a monster yet undetected. I had to stay focused though. Pride comes before the poor stock purchases as mother would say.

Finally I reach and pick up the vials. They're both unmarked. Damn. Drinking mystery potions is the kind of stupidity that removes people from the gene pool. Still I can't help but smile. Now I'd stolen something. I was a real thief. Silently I slipped the two vials into my jacket pocket. Surely there was some black market I could sell them on.

Now time to make my exit, right?

>>398813

>>398833

>>398889

I pause on the clearings border. Had I been approaching this situation from the wrong viewpoint. To much thief, not enough merchant. Focusing only on what I could take, when the most valuable thing wasn't the potions but the one who could make more of them?

Alchemists were always in high demand. Their potions were worth more than their weight in gold on the open market. The knowledge used to make them even more so. Perhaps if I played my cards right I could convince the cat girl to teach me how to make a few basic ones.

I approach her from behind. She still hasn't noticed me. Well there’s no time like the present.

“Hey there,”

She jumps, twirling in mid air, her tail fluffing up like a duster. Her surprise is expressed as a high pitched squeak that rises into a yowl. Two yellow feline irises glare at me. Behind her the beakers and tubes wobble, but mercifully nothing spills.

In hindsight maybe I should have announced myself more quietly.

“Man,” she says, the rise and fall of her chest visible. “You scared the fur off me. What the, what the hell are you doing creeping around the woods at this hour.”

She was trying to sound relaxed, but I could tell by her stance that she was still deciding if fight or flight was necessary. I needed to say something to calm her but shit, I didn't have a fake identity figured out yet. Looks like I'd have to think on my feet, like a thief would.

“Sorry, didn't mean to scare you. I'm Quint…ton. Quinton. And I'm a… thief. Professional thief.”

I resist the urge to cringe outwardly. What the heck brain, could you have come up with a worse answer. Yet strangely she seems to relax.

“Oh really. You know most crooks don't go around announcing themselves, Quinton.”

“Yeah, well most alchemists don't brew potions in the middle of the woods at night.”

“I wouldn't need to come out here if the stupid alchemist's guild just gave me a license.” The uncertainty is gone from her voice now, replaced with playfulness “What's it to you anyway.”

“Well, if its no bother I was hoping you could tell me a bit about alchemy.”

She takes a step forward closing the gap between us. “Hold on,” she purrs, “before we get down to business, you haven’t even let me introduce myself yet. Cleo, part time alchemist,” she offers a handshake and I take it. “Full time thief.” Her hand is soft and warm. I almost don't want to let go.

“You know,” Cleo continues, “this is a really nice sword.”

Her tail sways behind her, wrapped around a familiar weapon. Instinctively I loose the handshake and reach for the hilt of my blade. Its not there.

“When did you-”

“Its a timeless trick. Distract them with the handshake, check the pockets with you free appendages. I'm surprised you fell for it Mr purrfessional. This knife will fetch me a pretty penny at market.”

It would fetch more than that. The sword was magic. Used by my grandfather, the most famous hero of them all, before he graduated to bigger and better blades. It was also the only one of its kind and the merchant guild knew I had it. If they caught wind of someone selling it they'd know exactly which direction I'd run in.

“Look, I already said I was sorry for startling you. Just give it back.”

“Me and you are in the wrong profession for giving, don't you think Quinton. Tradings good though. I can cut you a deal.” I nod for her to continue, “See there's something my tail felt on you that I'm interested in. Something looong, cylindrical, hard,” she holds her chin thoughtfully.

“Wait just a-”

“There two of them actually. I don't think those potions belong to you Quinton.”

I can feel my cheeks redden. Though whether its from embarrassment or anger I can't tell. The idea of giving up the first thing I ever stole isn't something I relish, even for my own sword. In response to my distress her own expression softens.

“Tell you what, let me sweeten the pot. You got some skill to sneak round my camp. See, I've been looking for a partner in crime for a heist down at Randhiem. Five hundred barons to play for. We can split them 60-40 to me.”

My inner merchant bristles at that ratio.

“Why should I accept 40-60.”

“Consider that ten the cost of me teaching you the tricks of the trade. It's obvious you need some help. What do you say, will you at least hear me out?”

>>398951

I say hear her out and accept her offer, more skills and a possible future partner is crime is a welcome asset. Also, “the stone” needs to stop acting like a horn dog too. No need to wave your dick in front of the first monster you see. Obviously he needs to waifu the Demon Lord herself, not some random alchemist cat girl.

>>398951

The one has come

Execute order: touch some tit.

>>398951

Sweeten her deal with our dick.

>>398951

Hear her out, try to gauge potential risks.

Fuck off titfags, grab the pussy by the pussy. I love quests where anons are voices in the MC's head. Shitposting at the MC is 10/10.

>>398959

either way my waifu is a faggot cat, so i say we waifu her, just because she's the first we came across doesn't mean she's not a candidate, but we have to take it slow and build a relationship, no dicking for her just yet.

YET

i agree with your spoiler, watching it play out in my head, scenario's like this are just too fucking funny

>>398951

>And I'm a… thief. Professional thief.

YOU DENSE MOTHERFUCKER. At least you found a more skillful thief willing to teach you. But DEFINITELY delay robbing the bank somehow, that city will be crawling with a search party. Tell her "most" of the truth about why security will be tighter than usual for a while, just dont tell her YOU'RE who they're looking for specifically (she'll figure it out eventually but gotta try to control that. Spreading the rumor of your disappearance will cause a bit of a panic within the merchant guild but their desire to keep this secret will hasten their search, in turn that will cause some mistakes on their search. Better get a disguise kit quick though. Giving her the tip off to the security detail will likely make her want to check it out, but if she does drag yu there you'll definitely earn quite a bit of trust, but do ask about detouring to salliton.

Leveraging info are one of the skills merchants and thieves have in common, so make use of it.

>>398963

Oh, also, do trade back, but make sure the hand off is at the same time. Dont give the potions back first, she wont give your sword back first.

>>398951

>40-60

It's a 20% difference though, a 10% difference would be 45:55

>>398965

Part time alchemist

Full time thief

Zero time mathmatician

>>398951

hear her out, but tell her that a high profile merchant recently went missing in Randhiem and that's why you decided to bug out for a bit in the woods. Use that time instead to practice for a bit until everything calms down.

>>398951

How is her skills at fencing objects, bartering, and making connections? We might be able to make the pay more equal by teaching her some things about finding people who are willing to pay the most for goods (both legal and illegal).

I do assume you are better at this type of thing than the average merchant, right? Because I'm assuming she's at least average. I'm hoping below average though.

Ask if she's up for a bit of Merc work and offer her more of the Share for a permanent position on the team. Also sex her but don't lover her just yet, I'm thinking MC is a sex machine until he (we) decide on a permanent waifu. Also you should train on your ability to tame pussy.

>>398979

nigger, the first waifu you sex becomes your permanent waifu, you fucking degenerate.

>>398951

Well fine, tiddy grabs can come later, we should accept her offer

Cleo gave me some time to consider her offer. She had briefly returned to her potions, disassembling the array of beakers and muttering something about stupid low grade ingredients. Now the cat girl was lying on her bed roll gazing up at the night sky. Her tail was still wrapped around the hilt of my grandfathers blade.

Even if she hadn't already demonstrated her talent I'd believe she was a thief. Her body was lithe and athletic. It was easy to imagine her scaling the side of a building and slipping in through a barely ajar window. She looks relaxed, watching the stars pass overhead, almost as though she'd forgotten I was there. Only the occasional flick of her feline ears confirms that I'm still under surveillance.

“You going to stare all night or what?” she asks.

“Right, sorry.” The stone wanted me to listen to her offer. I didn't see any reason not to. Even if I turned her down in the end there was still the chance I'd learn something useful, “You said you had a job in Randhiem?”

“Yeah. Tomorrow actually. I'm off to rob myself a merchant.”

“Isn't the city two days travel from here?”

“Only if you walk it. I don't lug this alchemy kit around myself you know.”

The stone burned in my pocket.

>>398963

>>398967

Briefly I consider if poor arithmetic is a trait shared between feline cat burglars and magic pebbles alike. I had ditched my escort in the middle of nowhere, remember? It would take them three days to report back to the guild. I'd spent a day getting to my uncles farm, and another day walking through the woods. Thus, goddess willing, I had at least one more day before anyone important knew I was gone. Longer still before word reached Randhiem

Still the stones words aren't entirely unfounded. While I doubted bounty hunters would be prowling the streets looking for me yet, there was certainly the chance I'd be recognised. Lying low in the woods while the search passed me by and spread further afield was an appealing idea. Doubly so if I had a thief right here willing to tutor me.

But what could I say to convince her to delay.

“You sure robbing a merchant is wise. Especially in Randhiem. I mean, I heard a high profile member of the guild vanished there a few days ago.”

“Fur real?” she asks, ear pricking up.

“Yeah. Security is really tight right now. That’s why I’m hiding out in the woods.” The lie came easier this time. Maybe it's because I am only parroting the stones words. It seems like Cleo is buying it.

“That sucks. But it doesn't mean anything. Not even if every guard in the nation is reassigned to my marks living room. Quniton, I…” she pauses, her eyes flicking between my face and the open sky, “I've got a friend who needs this money. Really badly, you know”

“Your friend can't afford to wait?”

She shakes her head. “No. Not two months. That's how often the merchant visits the city to give the mayor a kickback.”

Ah, the merchant was here to pay bribes. The guild preferred to call them 'Additional Operational Fees'. Like that had fooled anyone, ever. Still bribes kept local law enforcement off their back. Cleo had said there were five hundred barons to play for. Sounded like the correct amount to be changing hands at a town of Randhiems size.

“He arrived earlier today. I've stalked his past few visits see. His schedule is real predictable. Tomorrow he leaves for an hour-long stroll round the city. Just after he eats brunch. Then in the evening he drops the kickback off at the mayoral office,” Cleo rolls onto her side, propping up her head with her elbow. “Any idea what all that means.”

“It means… that we can take the money when he goes to deliver it to the mayor?”

“No,” she scoffs. “With all that currency in pocket he'll be under armed guard. What it means is two tailed. First, there’s a window where his house is empty. Second. We know that's where he keeps all the money.”

“How so?”

“Didn't mention him visiting a bank tomorrow did I. All those barons probably travel in with him.”

“And so I come in where?”

“I need some kind of distraction. The house he stays at. All the windows are barred. Trust me I've tried. Only has one door too. No matter the time of day, or if he's in or out, the entrance is guarded. I could maybe slip in myself. But it's easier with someone to distract them. That’s all I need from you, I can handle the leg work.”

The plan sounded good. At least to me, with my extremely limited experience. But the stone was right, going straight to the city was risky. My mind wondered back to what she said, did Cleo really have a way of getting us there in less than a day?

“You can think on it,” she says, derailing my train of thought. “I'm leaving at sunrise tomorrow though. With or without you.”

“I'll keep that I mind.” I withdraw the two colourful vials from my pocket, “Regardless, we still have some other business to settle. I'd like my sword back please”

“Well since you asked so nicely. But, I was lying about what I said earlier you know. About selling your sword. Wouldn't make me any pennies anyway. I only know one fence and she never gives what my hard stolen goods are worth.” The pair of us swap the items back simultaneously. I watch closely but she doesn't seem to pull any funny business.

“Personally I've always found fencing items the easy part.” It feels good to hold the sword again. My arm tingles as the magic flows along it. I had no idea how Cleo hadn't noticed this. Perhaps the blade only responded to human wielders. “I know half a dozen places I could off load this sword for near market value,” I brag.

It was true aswell. Being raised in a merchant family did come with some advantages.

“For real. You know, maybe I should keep you around after we earn our keep tomorrow.”

“I was thinking the same to be honest,” I say. The stone was prodding at my conscious. It thought she'd make a good partner. Maybe we should work together more long-term. No one had ever said I had to fetch my inheritance alone. “I've got some… ideas for jobs further east.”

For now though it seemed wise to keep my end goal vague. If I told her I wanted to rob the Demon Lords castle as I am now she'd probably die laughing.

“Of course,” I say making my voice unnaturally gruff and serious, “first you gotta show you can hang with a professional like myself.”

“Excuse me Mr professional, but I think you've stolen my line.”

The two of us exchange a quick laugh. Still I can feel my eyes starting to droop. Her camp fire is almost burnt out now, if it gets any darker I'll be unable to find the way back to my tent. But was that really where I wanted to spend the night, all alone.

>>398955

>>398957

>>398959

>>398979

“So,” I say seating myself the edge of her bedroll. She tilts her head quizzically. “Looks like its going to be cold out tonight.”

“Its the height of summer Quinton.” She extends her arms above her head letting out a squeaky yawn. Her nose twitches.

“Right.”

“But I see your angle. I did say I'd teach you a bit about stealing, didn't I?” Cleo sits up, looping one arm around my shoulders. Our chests press together. “Rule one,” she purrs, her warm breath tickling my ear, “business before pleasure, Quinton. Now go get some sleep. Early start tomorrow, you know.”

“Oh, sleep well then,” is all I can muster as I make a flustered retreat across the clearing.

“Oh also, Quinton,” she calls. I turn just in time to see something flying towards me. My hands snatch it from the air. Its a coin purse. My coin purse. “Rule two. Watch you pockets.”

Its slow going, stumbling through the darkness back to my tent. Eventually I make it and a quick check of my inventory reveals she didn't take anything else. Even all my coins are still present and accounted for.

As I lay here, in the stillness of the woods waiting for sleep, two thoughts cross my mind.

Stone, should I except her job offer?

Also, what the fuck is a waifu?

Yes, accept the job offer

Also try to feel up that chest later.

>>399373

While I'm curious as to what business she needs some quick cash for, it's not really our place to ask. Besides, we're not gonna tell her what we're doing anyways.

Also, i still consider security to be hieghten as you pointed out one of the caravaneers may have secretly been a mage who mightve been able to send a message faster. Proceeding with caution is wise. And if security actually isnt elevated, you MIGHT be able to pass it of as a bad rumor and rookie mistake of not verifying it.

At this point it might be good to play both sides incase she plans on abandoning you as her distraction, though if all your stuff is still with you now she might not have such intentions.

>>399374

Get more info on her mark, probably wont be someone you recognize or recognizes you, but best to be sure. And if you two do recognize each other, you might be able to pull some strings to be a better distraction AND misdirect your hunters eventual trail away from you, maybe pointing them to the north instead?

Another thing, keep that "business before pleasure" line in your pocket, im almost certain it will be useful later.

And don't worry about the "waifu" thing for now, those other voices are just horndogs, as youve suggested.

Yeah, take the deal, you could use the money and knowledge.

Also, this crystal may have been slightly corrupted by demonic energy or created by a mamono, so sorry for any lewd suggestions you might run into. Also, waifu who kind of like someone you're targeting to one day become your wife. This voice says be patient, not that Cleo isn't good, but there might be ones more to your taste in the future.

>>399389

This talk of someone recognizing you made me realize something, we need a disguise. Change your hair and maybe dye it a different color so no one recognizes you. It might also be a good idea to wear a mask on your heists in case you screw up and someone notices you (if someone makes a wanted poster with your face, things will get a lot harder).

Also get a cloak. If you're being chased outside you just need to be out of sight and take off the cloak and mask and you might be able to lose your pursuers. Make sure the cloak can be thrown off in an instant so you can hide quickly and to avoid having people slow you down by grabbing it.

We should ask our new friend about her little alchemy business. Ask her what potions she has on hand and what she can make, i expect these would be quite useful for a thief. also ask if she can make something that can change our appearance so people wont recognize us in town. Also see if she can make aphrodisiacs and temporary infertility potions for us. Don't want to leave a bunch of fatherless bastards around the kingdom do we?

>>399532

You really have no idea how things work here, do you?

But some form of disguise and learning more about her business might very well be worthwhile. You know any merchants who sells good ingredients you make be able to get a deal with?

The stone woke me early the next day, before the sun had started to rise. Not that I had needed it to. The idea of going on an actual heist had kept me awake most of the night. It was true that, momentarily, I already stolen something from Cleo's camp. But that had been a crime of opportunity. There was something about having a plan in place that made the affair feel more official. Even if I was playing second fiddle.

Still, there was some preparations to make first.

>>399443

On the eve of my escape I had dressed myself in the clothes of the everyman. Plain cotton shirt and trousers, complimented by a long brown jacket with a hood to obscure my face. It was a far cry from the tailored suits I was used to, but no one on the street would give my outfit a second glance.

Of course there was the chance someone would recognise the man behind the clothes. I should fix that. A quick search of my backpack reveals that I have some surplus blue cloth. Using my sword, and a few minutes of light labour, I create a simple bandit mask. It looks ludicrously suspicious, but if I was seen mid heist it should at least conceal my identity. I'd have to invest in a better disguise when I got the chance. For now it would have to do. I store the mask in my jacket pocket.

The distance between our two camps felt much shorter when I wasn't trying to sneak or blunder around in the dark. Cleo was standing by the burnt out fire, all her belongings packed into a battered looking satchel. As opposed to most monsters, who seemed to revel in wearing as little as possible, Cleo had clad herself in concealing, baggy clothes with a colour pallet just as drab as my own. Her tail had disappeared, presumably wrapped around her waist, leaving only her vibrant pink hair sticking out. Even that had been partly covered by a flat cap.

“You sure know how to keep a cat waiting, Quniton,” she says looking at an imaginary pocket watch and tapping her foot. Her words can't hide the earnest smile that’s split her face from ear to ear though.

“Well you should be thankful Cleo. Good things come to those who wait.”

“I sure hope that’s true. Been waiting on this job for months.”

She leads me deeper into the woods, to a gently flowing river that I vaguely recall seeing on uncle's map. There's a small boat moored at the bank. No, boat is too generous a word. It was a few buoyant logs secured together by rope. A rudder and some sort of glass funnel are affixed to the rear of the ramshackle construct.

Cleo sits cross legged next to the funnel. I take up position opposite her, wondering how many people this thing can possibly hold. It sits dangerously low in the water but Cleo doesn't seem concerned. She uncorks the grey potion I had pilfered last night and pours it down the glass funnel.

The water around us starts to bubble. Before I can voice my concerns the boat lurches forward, travelling upstream with frighting speed. Cleo grins smugly.

“Stole the design for this myself from a fellow alchemist. Her original version had more umph, you know. But I altered this one to be real quiet.” She rests one arm on the rudder. “We've got a few hours before Randhiem.”

“Then there’s plenty of time for you to tell me what other alchemical knowledge you've stolen.”

“Hey, I didn't steal all of it. I learned most of my craft the proper way. In a study-hall with books. You might just have heard of those. I was top of my class, you know.”

“Must be useful to know that stuff. As a thief, I mean.”

“Would be if I could make any potions. See-Me-Not, Coffins, Heat, Obfuscates,” she taps the side of her head, “I know all the recipes. Can't get the ingredients though. Not for the price of my own tail. The Alchemist guild is having a shortage or something. Right now their stockpiles are for members only.”

I nod along as though I wasn't already aware. As the heir apparent of the merchant guild I was one of the first to know of any fluctuations in supply and demand. Normally any kind of shortage would be cause for much rejoicing among my peers. After all it was the best time to turn a profit.

Alas the sole provider of alchemical ingredients was the alchemists guild and they were a stubborn bunch. When they decided they weren't selling, then nothing was leaving their warehouses, no matter how generous the merchant guilds offers were. Must have been frustrating for Cleo, to be talented and yet unable to utilise it. Perhaps not the best time to discuss alchemy.

“The guy we're robbing, this merchant. What’s his name?”

“Theodore Cabinsprain.”

Lets see, did I know a merchant by that name? Vaguely I do recall a Theodore attending my twelfth birthday party. Yes, he had gifted me my favourite set of silver cutlery. When I was younger a lot of merchants assumed if they pleased me I'd put in a good word with mother on their behalf. Even back then I recall thinking such bribery was barefaced. I couldn't remember seeing Theodore after that, can't even recollect what he looks like. Hopefully he wouldn't remember me either.

“It doesn't matter what he's called though,” Cleo says, jolting me from my thoughts with the sudden venom in her voice. “Merchants are all scum anyways.”

I hear the splintering of wood. Her hand is gripping the rudder handle hard enough to crack the beam, and her claws are out. It looked as though she was holding five hooked daggers. The cat girl notices my staring, takes a deep breath, and retracts them.

For a second I consider leaping to the defence of my fellow merchant. We weren't all bad. Besides who did this petty criminal think she was, unprovokingly insulting the largest, most prosperous of all guilds. But right now I was Quinton and he wouldn't do that. Quinton had no attachments to the merchant guild. He was out to rob one of them.

“Oh really? Can't say I've met many merchants.” My voice wavers. Cleo seems to lost in her anger to notice.

“Then just trust me on this one, you know. Don't feel bad about cat burglaring them. I don't know this merchant personally. But I know he deserves it.”

An awkward silence descends after that. For a long time I sit quietly watching the wood pass by as two green blurs on either side of us. Cleo was right about her alchemical… thing. I was only a few feet from it, yet all I could hear was the ambience of the river.

“You know, I promised you training right?” she says, finally ending the quiet. Her usual playful smile makes its return.

“I do recall something along those lines.”

“Then gather round apprentice, its time for your meowster to show you a bolt from a padlock.”

“What did you just call yourself?”

“Master.”

“Really, I mean it sounded-”

“I said master, ok. Now hush. First off were going to have to work on your sneaking. That's fundamental you know. Those boots. What made you think a pair of stompers like that were a good idea?”

I point an accusing finger towards her, “These boots snuck up on you, remember.”

“Oh sure. You can get away with them on soft dirt. But just try them on a tin roof.” She makes a series of abrasive noises that I can only assume are meant to imitate boots on roof. “Absolute disaster. What you need is these.”

She leans back presenting her bare feet for my inspection. I shuffle awkwardly, unsure of what she means.

“I should creep around with no shoes?” I ask. That sounded like a terrible idea.

Cleo rolls her eyes. “Look again apprentice. We thieves need an eye for small details you know.” She moves her feet closer. I squint. There's something semi transparent in between her toes.

“Rubber soles,” I say more confidently. She lets out a purr.

“Now you're getting somewhere. All the feeling and grip of bare feet. Less chance of slicing yourself open on cobblestones. I'll have to see if I can swipe you some of these. So, any idea what else you missed?”

I shake my head, irritated to find out I was making multiple errors.

“Honestly you're lucky we met apprentice.” Her tail sways behind her energetically. “What's going to give you away most of all is your scent.”

“Excuse me?” I'd only been travelling for two days. It hadn't even been that strenuous. There’s no way I smelt that bad already.

“Don't take it the wrong way. But you're a young, virile male. Any single monster girl is going to be able to smell you from a mile away, you know. Specially beast types like me,” I open my mouth to complain. “Hold up. I would have smelled you just fine last night. If I wasn't nose deep in an alchemical fire.”

“Well fine. What exactly am I supposed to do about that? Bathe more?”

“Partly. I might be able to help you out though. I could devise an alchemical compound that masks you. For real. But I'd need something with your scent on to work with.”

I'm not sure how to respond to that. Mercifully the goddess choose this moment for our journey to end. The boat bumps against the river bank. Cleo hops off and secures it to the shore with a rope.

>>399714

Lizard girls are very into warriors, they are willing to merry the person who can beat them. Meaning? You could probably distract her by challenging her to a duel.

I know you'll probably lose, but I'll say it anyway. Unless you want her following you, constantly asking for you to marry her, don't win. Ask for a fistfight, your sword might make you stand out, or even net you the win if it's good enough.

>>399715

I concur, challenge the lizardthot to a fistfight, and put up a resistance to be convincing then fold and run.

>>399714

Grab her boobies

Close the distance and touch some titty

>>399714

Gonna have to repeat what others have said. Challenge to a fist fight, put up some resistance, but ultimately lose. She's green so she wont take you as her own unless you win. This could also land you a scar on your face which could slow down any search for you later on.

>>399715

Oh, and another thing. Practice your evasion while fighting. Thieves need to be good at dodging.

>>399799

>>399715

both of these voices are correct, you should also remember to use the environment to your advantage, it's fine to fight dirty when you're a thief.

>>399804

I agree what kind of thief would we be without high evasion.

Well, as an opener, or to buy more time after a duel, you can ask some questions about her sword and armor. You mentioned that you've bought and sold them, and you have some knowledge of swordplay. As such, you should be able to pretend that you're a weapon enthusiast that would like to one day be a war profitee… er… weapons and armor merchant, and have been scouting locations in your travels. I expect that, armor impracticalities aside, that her equipment is of good quality, so you should be able to admire and criticize them, compare weapons, and ask about local prices at the very least.

Under most circumstances boxing with a guardsman in the street would be a terrible idea. A quick way to earn oneself a night in a cell and possibly a broken nose. At least it usually was, if the guard was human.

Instead I needed to distract a monster, and I had no idea how one of those would react. The stone seems to know far more on the subject than I did and it was pushing for a scuffle. Looks like all the years I’d spent duelling hadn't been wasted.

I just hope the lizard girl isn't as strong as she looks.

“Morning,” I say, approaching her as casually as possible. “Do you have a moment?”

“Good morrow to you as well sir,” she says, saluting. “How can the guard be of service.”

“Oh, there's no emergency or anything. Its just, well I’m curious, could I have a look at your sword?”

Wordlessly she draws her blade and presents it for my inspection.

“Is that a Flake original?” I ask suppressing the urge to reach out and touch it. “They haven’t manufactured these in decades. Must be worth a small fortune.”

“I wouldn't know its value sir. I inherited it from my grand mother.” The lizard girl slides the weapon back into its sheath. “It's also not for sale.”

“Well even if it was I doubt I could afford it,” I gesture at my clothes. Now complete with wear and dirt from Farron wood I'm starting to look like an authentic vagabond. “See, remarkable as your sword is, personally I'm more interested in testing myself against the one who wields it.”

Her reaction is far more intense than I expected. The lizard girls entire body stiffens as her cheeks turn a shade of red. Her mouth opens and closes as the words struggle to tumble out.

“Sir, I, are you, right now, are you challenging me to a duel?”

“If you need a more formal declaration then yes.” I hold out my hand as though requesting a dance, “I Quinton, challenge you to a duel.”

“I, you flatter me sir,” she says refusing to meet my gaze, “but I'm afraid I couldn't possibly accept such a proposal while on duty.”

“Ah, that's a shame.”

“Of course,” she adds hastily, “we could always duel tonight, when I’m free. We can meet out by the river, with the stars as our only witness, and then after-”

“Sorry, but I'm not in Randhiem for long. By that time I'll have been on the road for several hours.” I throw in a melodramatic sigh for good measure, “I guess this duel just wasn't meant to be.”

Externally I manage to keep it together as I slowly walk away from the house. But on the inside my mind is a hurricane. This was the time to prove my worth. To myself mostly. How could I pull of the heist of the century if I couldn't even bypass a single guard. I needed another plan to-

I feel a hand on my shoulder. It's the lizard girl. Before I can say a single syllable she bows deeply from the waist down.

“Forgive me sir.”

“…ok.”

“I wrongly tried to place my duty as a guard above my obligation to my species. If it's not to late Sir I would like to accept your challenge.”

Behind her, before Theodore's now vacant front door, Cleo drops down from the rooftops landing silently on all fours. She gives me a thumbs up before inserting one of her claws into the lock. It only takes her a second to pick it, and another to scurry inside the house.

“Of course it's not to late.”

“What are your terms then sir.” she asks. The stoicism the lizard girl displayed while standing at attention is all gone. Now she's constantly moving, swaying on her toes. The kind of motion one does to loosen up before a fight.

“Well, since I am unarmed we'll have to settle this with fists. Until one of us yields or is no longer able to continue.” My grandfathers blade is safely out of view beneath my jacket. If lizard girls are as into warriors as the stone suggests I don't want to know how she'd react to seeing such a legendary sword.

She nods, taking up a wide stance. I try to copy her. Unarmed fighting isn't my forte, but it's far safer than fighting with swords. Besides, I wanted to minimise my chances of accidentally besting her.

The lizard girl wastes no time, aiming her first punch towards my stomach. I dodge. Swordplay was my speciality, but even unarmed the footwork required is similar. She swings again, and again, each of her moves flowing effortlessly into the next. In close quarters I would have been pummelled. Fortunately the empty street provides no shortage of space to retreat into.

“Are you perhaps trying to wear me out?” she asks. “That won't work sir. Any man will tire before I do.”

That was true. I was good at dodging blows but I couldn't keep this up forever. Already I could feel sweat beading on my forehead. She was the one throwing all the punches, yet she didn't look winded at all.

There was more to worry about than just stamina though. If I kept evading her the whole fight she might realise I'm just a distraction. It had to look like I was at least trying to compete.

My fist lashes out, flying towards the first part of her that pops into my head.

>>399761

>>399763

It collides with her metal bra. My wrist buckles as I grit my teeth. Even so a grunt of pain escapes me.

“Sir,” she drops her guard are completely, “are you hu-”

My other hand slams into her face. It was a low blow. The kind that would have seen me expelled from the fencing club of my youth. That was the point though, if the lizard girl was angry at me I could hold her attention. Long enough for Cleo to get the job done.

“That was a good strike sir.” Strangely she didn't sound upset at all. In fact spread across her seemingly unharmed face was a grin. “It appears I underestimated your tenacity. I shan’t make that mistake again.”

Her next strike was so fast I can barely follow it. I jerk my head just in time, feeling her knuckles graze my cheek. Had she been going easy on me before? I don't have any time to even think about being indignant before I'm frantically dodging a barrage of punches, kicks and-

Her tail, a limb I hadn't considered at all, catches me in the stomach knocking the wind out of me. I attempt to recover only to receive a kick to my chest that leaves me sprawling on the ground.

“I yield.” She pulls her next punch mid motion, looking down at me with an unreadable expression.

“It was a good fight sir. If I may be so bold however I would like to ask you something.”

By my own internal clock I still needed to buy Cleo some more time. So I gesture for her to go on. She kneels beside me.

“Why challenge me in a style of combat you're not proficient in.”

“What makes you think that?”

“Between motions your hands return here sir. Below your waist as though holding a sword. An unarmed combatant should know to hold his hands up here, to protect his face.”

Shit. Was she simply curious about the fight, or did she suspect I was up to something. If it was the latter I'd have to answer her question carefully. Silver tongues were supposed to be a talent of merchants and thieves alike. Surely I can construct some sort of believable tale.

“It's because of my teacher,” I say, “before he passed, he said the fastest way to become a great swordsman was to cross blades with a lizard girl,” I cover my face with one hand so she can't read it. “Its just, goddess curse my luck, the day before I finally met you bandits stole my sword from the inn while I slept. Teacher, would be so ashamed.”

She takes my other hand between hers and gives it a firm squeeze.

“Sir, on my own honour I pledge to you that this inJUSTICE won't play out. Wait here, I'll find you the finest sword in all of Randhiem. Then we'll have a duel so grand even the Demon Lords knights will gawk in awe.”

Wait here, I think to myself as she dashes away to fulfil her pledge. It wasn't as though I was going anywhere else, not until I caught my breath at least. Gradually the pains in my torso and wrist subside. Nothing felt broken, although I'd probably be sporting some viscous bruises by tomorrow. Eventually I pick myself up and walk back to Theodore's house.

There was still no sign of Cleo. How long had it been now. Definitely more than five minutes. She'd said if she wasn't back by now then something had gone wrong. It's time to consider my options.

The street was still empty, I could slip in there to find out what the hold up was. There was five hundred barons to be won and besides, if the cat girl was in trouble she'd surely be grateful for my help.

Still I didn't know if honour among thieves had any basis outside of story books. If Cleo had screwed up was it my responsibility to go help her. Should I just cut my losses and run?

The third option was to just wait here. Maybe Cleo had just run into a particularity difficult lock or something. Of course the longer I waited, the greater the chance the lizard girl would return. I'm not sure I could handle another match at the moment.

>>400504

Stay in the general area grabbing as many titties as you can, that way people are nice and distracted while the lizard girl getting your new sword. Free swords are nice

>>400504

Wait a minute, i think i missed something. What do you mean by "legendary blade?"

>>400504

Go in and check on her. Even if she isn't in trouble, you could probably carry a few things off with you, and that merchant's eye of yours should be able to deduce the most expensive objects. And remember, a thief needs to take risks or they won't get paid. If you can't handle this mansion, you'll never get into a castle filled with mamono.

But if you do see Cleo and it seems like she isn't in trouble, we might want to avoid her seeing us. Would hate to make her think we're ruining botching the job.

>>400510

His grandfather was a hero and he inherited his sword.

>>400656

It's important not to get caught at all, and right now I don't see any subtle ways of saving Cleo, and if you save her now you'll have to get out immediately. That girl might try to lock her up, then you can rescue her without being found and maybe steal some more things in the process.

>>400656

Instead of unlocking the mimic, we sneak up on her from behind and lock her up, if the chest she’s is light enough, carry it out of the building and find a way to transport it, if cleo really has gone unconcious, we atleast have a hostage, if not, cleo can escape with us and we’ll dump the mimic somewhere along the road, or maybe sell her to an unlucky young, virile merchant

>>400656

Good thing you picked up the silverware. Don your mask, obscure your face as best you can, then toss a fork or something into the room. You'll want to lure the mimic out of chloe's view before using your sword to (hopefully just) knock her out with the broadside to the head. If the sword really is legendary, you'll also want as few people as possible to know where it is.

>>400656

What >>400661 said but feel up her "treasure chest" first

One thing about mimics - they usually stay in one place for a very long time. As you can see (and hear), this one is particularly thirsty. She hasn't tasted a male in a very long time, or perhaps never, if she's a virgin.

>>400666

Alternatively, you could use yourself as a lure. Taunt her. Make sure to have her full attention so she'll let go of your feline partner. Remember, mimics are mostly immobile, so she won't be chasing you around, but her tentacles will lunge at you.This is where your evesion skills come into play. Hopefully the cat is still conscious, because dealing with mimics is easier when you're not alone. One of you needs to jump on her "human" body and bonk her in the head a few times so she herself falls uncoscious. That is, if you aren't cruel enough to kill her with your sword. Might be a last resort if you're truely desperate.

>>400661

Let's not, we're thieves not slavers.

>>400675

Specifically voting against this, please stop trying to make advances against every possible waifu in the story, and touching her “treasure chest” is not the best thing to do in this situation.

>>400718

Be sure to sage when you post here

>>400713

This is probably better, actually. Just yell into the room "Come here, baby, leave the cat behind." then knock her upside the head with a safe part of your sword.

>>400754

And then feel up her treasure

>>400656

Go for a surprise attack.

First try knocking her out directly with a blunt strike to the head. If that doesn't work then change focus and try to free Cleo. The two of you should have an easier time fighting at the same time.

>>400719I think you've got the wrong anon >>400716 >>400713 are the newfags nonsagers in the thread.

>>400666 Satan seems to have a good thought, so i'm going along the lines of that

Sneaking was a good idea. If I could get close enough undetected I could easily knock out the, as the stone identified it, mimic. Direct confrontation felt needlessly risky. My stomach still ached, a dull reminder of how strong monsters were. Besides, who knew what else could be hiding in that chest. If I stepped up to fight and she revealed two dozen more tentacles I'd stand no chance.

The room was small, with only one entrance that fell within the mimics cone of vision. I was far more skilled at sneaking than I'd been even a day prior. But would that be enough. I need to make sure I was doing this right.

Cleo had said my boots were too loud. Quickly and quietly I slip them off. My face is safe and masked. I can't recall meeting a mimic before. Yet if she's associated with the merchants guild there's a slim chance she'd recognise my unmasked face. Was there anything else to consider?

>>400666

Good shout rock. What I needed was a distraction. Carefully I crouch by the door, clutching a knife. It's go time.

I hurl the knife across the room. It strikes the far wall, embedding itself between two wooden planks. The mimic jumps, briefly exposing her unclothed lower half. Her tentacles drop Cleo unceremoniously before speeding towards the disturbance. Towards the other side of the room, away from me. Perfect.

By the time she realises it's just cutlery and begins looking for the real threat I've already halved the distance between us. She spots me quickly. In hindsight getting behind her for an easy knock out in such a small space might have been too optimistic. Even though I'm silent, there's nothing to hide behind. It's fine though. I place my hand on the hilt of my blade. Only a few more steps before I can use it.

To the mimics credit she doesn't freeze up or hesitate. Instead she thrusts both her arms forward. A new tentacle shoots from the chest, mimicking the mimics motion. Before I even see the attack my sword yanks me to left and the tentacle passes through the space where my legs were moments ago. She begins making another gesture, but it's too late.

“He-hey, wait just a-” In one swift motion I draw my sword and slash horizontally straight through her torso.

For a second she looks confused, likely wondering why the blade passed through her without bloodshed. Then the magic kicks in. Her eyes roll upwards and she topples back into her chest, unconscious.

The stone grows hot in my pocket. It's not hard to guess what questions it wants to ask. I suppose I hadn't yet explained the capabilities of my inherited sword.

My grandfather didn't enjoy spilling blood unnecessarily, so it wasn't hard to see why he would choose this sword. It's not a conscious entity, but it can determine its wielders intent. If you want something dead it cuts as well as any blade, and if you want someone incapacitated it merely saps their vitality. The weapon also enhances its users existing skill, correcting footwork, guiding blows towards opponents weak spots, and helping them dodge incoming attacks.

Unfortunately, like most magic items as I understand them, it runs on a limited pool of mana that needs to recharge over a period of not being used. It doesn't have a large pool either. Over a protracted fight I can very easily imagine its reserves running dry.

Thankfully, I think to myself as I sheath the weapon, this battle was the opposite of long. In fact it had played out better than I could have hoped. Alas there was no time to celebrate. I didn't know when the lizard girl would return to honour her pledge. Or how she'd react finding me inside the house she had been assigned to guard. I imagine it would involve her non-magic, fleshing slicing sword being used and after the fist fight I wasn't confident I could best her.

A quick check over Cleo confirms she's still breathing. Just like the mimic she seems unconscious. Speaking of the girl in the chest, her tentacles stopped moving as soon as I knocked her out. But now they're, er, dissolving I think. I watch the closest one fade away, leaving behind a fine purple powder. For now I figure that's something I shouldn't touch.

Rather I decide to take a peak into the chest, to make sure the mimic is really down and out. She is, but that's not what catches my attention. Inside the ordinarily sized chest is an entire room. A big one at that. I circle the chest, but there's no sign of any walls that I can see from up here. Only more floor. I feel like I'm violating some kind of scientific rule just by viewing this.

Not wanting to consider such madness any longer, I close the lid. At the very least if the mimic regains consciousness she'll have to open it back up and I'll have some warning. Now what should I do ne-.

…

…

My hand is stuck to the chest. Really, immovably stuck, as though I had just touched the worlds fastest acting adhesive. Instinctively I reach down with my other hand to pry the stuck one free, only to realise at the last second what a truly terrible idea that would be.

A minute or two of wiggling and pulling reveals that my hand isn't coming free any time soon.

…

Well shit.

>>401568

Wedge the chest between two beams and yank hard

Then feel up cleo's chest to ensure she's all right.

Are you wearing gloves? Slip out if you are. If not, you removed your boots before, so pushing off with a foot is out.

Ask your partner in crime for help?

Failing that, if you're okay with losing your pants, using a knee or calf is an option.

Additonal options:

If you have another knife, get it under your hand and pry it off.

Find a piece of cloth, attach it to the chest, push off with that.

Break the piece of chest your hand is attached to off.

>>401573

>Ask your partner in crime for help?

A quick check over Cleo confirms she's still breathing. Just like the mimic she seems unconscious. sage you nigger faggot

>>401568

Use our sword's inherent abilities to guide a strike towards the weak spot of whatever the fuck is causing our hand to stick to the chest. Once our shit is free, use our newfound freedom to adhere our hand to Cleo's chest.

>>401567

Can you pick up the chest, since it is stuck to your hand? If it won't come off then well, run with it. Unless it's too heavy to lift.

In that case…

Will the chest slide around? If so, slide it close enough to Cleo that you can kick her enough to wake her up. Then get her to help you. Be quick about it.

>>401579

>>401567

Wake up Cleo, either way. We don't want to leave her there.

So can our sword induce list lust and orgasm or does it only sap stuff? Try to pry your hand out. If you need to carry your catburgular Ally make sure to be handsy

>>401567

Spit on it, i always spit on it when i get fresh glue stuck on me, it sounds stupidly simple but it might work.

Also, regarding the OP sword, you might have a practical incentive to get a waifu now, if you cop a feel of cleo’s chest, you might regain mana much faster.

>>401567

Spit on it, i always spit on it when i get fresh glue stuck on me, it sounds stupidly simple but it might work.

Also, regarding the OP sword, you might have a practical incentive to get a waifu now, if you cop a feel of cleo’s chest, you might regain mana much faster.

>>401568

Well shit, we forgot about the final defense for this sitaution. You really don't have time to try pulling yourself off if we don't know what compound is. Spit is a great solvent for tons of stuff, but it's better if you can wake cleo and ask for her help, and DON'T GRAB HER BOOBS. Not sure why that other voice is so intent on marrying you off right away.

>>401591

How exactly are you supposed to use a sword to pry anything when both our hands are stuck on the chest?

>>401708

>Use the mimic's chest wrap to protect your other hand

Both our hands are already stuck on the chest… We don't have a free hand at the moment. We need to focus on waking up Cleo. Waking up the mimic could be disastrous.

>>401758

He says that his HAND is stuck twice, not his HANDS. So we still have 1 free hand.

>>401766

I think you're wrong.

The line here:

>Instinctively I reach down with my other hand to pry the stuck one free, only to realise at the last second what a truly terrible idea that would be.

This implies that he tried to use his free hand to pry his stuck hand free. But that resulted in it getting stuck as well. It's a classic stuck in glue gag. But I guess OP will inform us in the next post.

>>401770

Reading comprehension, nigger. only to realise at the last second and would be both lets us, the reader, know that he did not go through with the action simply because of what the word would means.

>(expressing the conditional mood) indicating the consequence of an imagined event or situation.

>>401771

Oops. You're right. I'm convinced we've just got one hand stuck.

>>401772

It is just one hand. In the first draft it was both and then I changed it in the revision, leaving behind a clunky sentence.

Morale of the story, don't edit in the early hours of the morning.

>>401591

I wouldn't be surprised if the sword had capabilities that I wasn't aware off. Even magic items built for singular purposes often had unintended functions. Like that deck of cards that was supposed to help you cheat at games, yet ended up being able to predict the future. Alas when my grandfather had left me this weapon he'd neglected to include a corresponding instruction manual.

Anyway, now wasn't the time to worry about that. My sword wouldn't help me if I was arrested. And by the goddess, I don't know how I'd survive the embarrassment if my quest ended like this, glued to a chest in the first town I'd visited. I could already imagine the headlines;

Flint Haybarrow, grandson of the legendary hero, caught on the run after only three days.

Head of Randhiem City Guard says “Easiest bounty of my life!”

Fortunately the stone has no shortage of ideas. Some of which I must strenuously disagree with. Chop off my hand? Is it serious. I understand that as a piece of mystical sediment it can't fully appreciate the wonderful utility of fingers. But as someone who possess ten I must stress that I'm rather attached to mine.

Most of the stones less self mutilating suggestions involved moving the mimic's home. That seems like a logical place to start. The chest is actually a lot lighter than I expected. I'd assumed that trying to lift something containing an entire room, complete with occupant, would be equivalent to trying to roll a boulder up a hill. Yet I reckon with two hands I could carry this around. With the one currently attached I can at least drag it around the room.

I shift the chest over to the door frame. It's too wide to fit through length ways, making this a great place to wedge it. With the chest on one side of the door and myself on the other I brace against the wall and pull with all my strength.

My hand doesn't budge. Not in the slightest. I try again, this time leaning backwards to use my entire weight. Same result. If it's possible to free myself with brute force I don't think I have the strength required.

I ask the stone for another plan. It suggests I pry my hand free by sliding a blade between my fingers. H'mm, if my swords guiding magic is just as useful here as on the battlefield then that's an idea with merit. And at least using it I can't accidentally lose a finger

I draw my weapon, position it carefully, and slide it underneath my palm. Or that's what I would have done, if the tip of the blade didn't become stuck as soon as it touched the chest. I quickly try to yank it free, to no avail. How the fuck? The sword is magic. I mean I guess the chest is too, given what's inside it, but still. I'd expected a better showing than that.

Frustrated I drag the chest back into the centre of the room. Now if the guards did show up I had no way of defending myself.

Time for the stones more bizarre ideas. Reluctantly I spit on my hand. It's not pleasant but the stone has a point. Liquid might defuse the adhesive. My hand moves and for a moment I'm filled with hope. Then reality cruelly intrudes. My lubricated hand slides along the surface of the chest, but I still can't pull it away.

I try moving my hand to different parts of the chest, doesn't seem like there's any difference in stickiness between the wooden and metal parts.

From where she's lying Cleo mutters something inaudible. Right, she was the reason I'm here. I'd been so focused on trying to free myself I'd almost forgotten.

“Hey, Cleo. Come on, it's time to go,” I say, gently shaking her shoulder.

“Give me five more Red.” She mutters, still soundly asleep.

I shake her more vigorously to no avail. Poking her belly and flicking her ears get similar results. Whatever the mimic did to her had left my partner in crime completely out of it. Damn it, there's gotta be some way to wake her. If only I knew anything about monsters.

Well I might not know much about them, but the stone seemed too. A few of its many voices were chittering on about the cat girls breasts as per usual. Was the stone just being horny again, or was this actual advice? I mean, I recall succubi being able to draw energy from sexual acts. If this was a trait shared by all monsters, could that help wake Cleo.

I look down at her, the slight rise and fall of her perky chest is visible even through her baggy outfit. There's not enough time to sit around trying to come up with an alternative plan. If feeling her up would also wake her up then I had to go for it. Besides, I'm only doing this to help her, right?

My free hand cups her breast. She hasn't been blessed with a massive rack, especially compared with the mimic I just saw, but there's more than enough flesh to fill my palm. I move my hand in circles as I start to grope her, occasionally swapping from one breast to the other. As I do so she starts to shift, her legs twitch and her tail emerges to sway beside her. I hope those are signs this is working.

I continue, trying to ignore my own growing arousal. With thumb and forefinger, I rub her nipple through the cloth shirt. She purrs appreciatively as her back arcs slightly. Her eyelids flutter open.

My hand retreats from her breasts at light speed. After a moment the cat girl sits up yawning.

“Quinton? I… thought you wouldn't come.”

“Well, I mean why wouldn't-”

Before I can finish the sentence she embraces me in a bone crushing hug. I return the gesture with my one free arm, resisting the urge to cop another feel. Our bodies press so close together, there's no way she can't feel the erection straining in my pants.

“Cleo,” I say, trying to disengage, “This is nice, I mean, but we need to get moving.”

“Yeah,” she says, resting her head on my shoulder. “Thanks for coming though. Fur real.”

We disentangle. She climbs, a little shakily, to her feet.

“Did you find the score,” she asks. I shake my head. “You know, my feline intuition is telling me that if the mimic was guarding this room….” She opens the draw on the bedside table and, after a brief search, pulls out a large cloth bag. It jingles with the delightful metallic clink that only a bag full of barons can make. Cleo passes it to her tail, which stashes it under her shirt. “Time to scamper.”

“Yeah, about that.” I wiggle my trapped arm. “Little help?”

“You seriously touched a mimic, Quinton? Argh, how stuck are you?”

“I'm afraid I've become a permanent fixture.”

“Aright, I think I saw a formula for this exact issue once. Should be able to brew it.” Cleo pauses to count with her fingers, “Going price for that kind of potion is twenty barons.”

“Are you serious-”

“But with your associates discount I suppose I can give you them for free. I need my alchemy kit back at the boat to make them though.”

That meant I'd have to carry the mimics chest across town. That was risky. What if I ran into the lizard girl, I'd have no chance of fleeing carrying something this bulky. Or bumped into Theodore the merchant out on his stroll. He'd surely recognise his own stuff.

“Is there any other way of fixing this.”

“Well mimics are kinda rare, you know. But I think they control how sticky they get though. I guess you could try convincing her to let you go.” She shrugs. “It's your arm. So your call.”

>>401875

Tell the mimic that there is a substantial chance of her getting laid if she lets your hand go.

Alternatively, you can stick all four limbs on the same board and proclaim your love for her and lament that you cannot properly express that love if you are stuck like that.

Also get a better feel of the cat rack

>>401875

Unlock a window or something, so Cleo can get back inside a little later. Then tie the mimic chest shut tightly, and find somewhere to hide until Cleo gets back with a potion to free you. Hopefully she can get back to you quickly.

If the mimic wakes up in the meantime… Shit, I dunno. Try to reason with her, since we should have her imprisoned inside the chest at that time.

>>401875

>>401877

Grabbing cleo’s breasts does not offer any advantage right now, we should put a cloth over the mimic to conceal her and carry her back to the boat with haste.

>>401882

>we should put a cloth over the mimic to conceal her and carry her back to the boat with haste

Not a bad idea, if we can manage to avoid suspicion from guards.

>>401883

We have to come up with a convincing story, maybe one that tugs at the heart a little. Maybe it’s a chest filled with food for an orphanage?

>>401875

As strange as it may sound, you probably didnt use enough spit, but time is short. The mimic is out too, so youre not likely to make much headway trying to convince it of anything. Gonna have to carry the box out through town. If things get real desperate, you at least have your sword ready to make this a hostage situation, but for the love of all that is holy let's hope it doesnt come to that, otherwise youll have to keep the mimic with you much longer than would be comfortable.

OR you can try pulling a similar trick on the keyhole with your mostly stuck hand as you did with cloe and her breasts. And by that, i mean using you saliva covered hand to finger the hole in hopes that she'll undo the sticky trap long enough for you to escape.

>>401885

>If things get real desperate, you at least have your sword ready to make this a hostage situation

The sword is also stuck to the chest, so we are now more or less defenseless.

From >>401874

I draw my weapon, position it carefully, and slide it underneath my palm. Or that's what I would have done, if the tip of the blade didn't become stuck as soon as it touched the chest. I quickly try to yank it free, to no avail. How the fuck? The sword is magic. I mean I guess the chest is too, given what's inside it, but still. I'd expected a better showing than that.

Frustrated I drag the chest back into the centre of the room. Now if the guards did show up I had no way of defending myself.

>>401886

Ah… I didn't expect all that keyword and syntax highlighting in a code block.

>>401886

He doesnt actually need the sword free to do it, and in the absolutely worst case scenario he or cloe can just drive it in. Again, this option is a last resort that we hope does not happen. Tbqh, i'd say figerbanging the mimic's keyhole is the better option here but that could make any fucking complication happen. which would lead to quite an exciting tale, especially if this is how he builds a harem

>>401875

If you can, pull the mimic out of her chest all the way and tie her up. Tell her she can either release you, or you can take away her fancy chest. And what man would want a mimic without her chest? Nobody would love her then!

>>401877

>Feel up the cat

Not while she's awake and aware, fool!

>>401888

>fucked her right in the keyhole

>>401888

Maybe we can slide our hand down to the keyhole if we put some more spit on it.

Try to smuggle the chest somewhere safe and secure, then stick your dick in the key hole. Would she get less stick or more when she gets turned on? i'd say touch titty.

>>401900

DO NOT USE DICK, ONLY FINGER

>>401901

>DO NOT USE DICK, ONLY FINGER

Yes, but LOTS OF SPIT

>>401901

But there might not be boobs behind the keyhole…

>>401889

also, finger the keyhole with the already stuck hand

<Out of character posting

You fags should really reading the lore on mimics about this keyhole stuff. It's actually a really good approach to take in this situation.

https://monstergirlencyclopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Mimic

>>401910

And sage your posts, FFS

I have a plan, though it is a bit risky.

Let Cleo leave. Get caught by lizard guard. Now this may sound insane on its face, but I believe we can talk our way out.

In the guard's absence, we noticed someone sneaking in. Not wanting to see the guard in trouble, we tried to apprehend the thief ourselves. When we managed to get inside, we found the thief had incapacitated the mimic, but was disarmed in the process. We grabbed the thief's weapon, and the thief fled. We decided to see if the mimic was alright before pursuing the thief, but got stuck. And here we are.

If nothing else, it'll make a decent plan B.

>>401950

>no sage

I must commit sudoku

>>401951

For future reference, you can delete posts immediately after you post them. Probably too late now.

>>401914

"However, on one occasion, there was a man who succeeded in unlocking the chest by inserting some kind of pole-shaped object, other than a key, into the keyhole."

INSERT. DICK. with or without spit.

>>401956

>INSERT. DICK. with or without spit.

A finger is also pole-shaped, anon. But it needs LOTS OF SPIT. Think that's enough spit? No. Apply more spit.

>>401956

I think your penis is too big for the keyhole.

>>401875

Get out of there first, take her with you, then just drug the mimic until its so fucked it lets you go.

>>402018

GODDAMN NEWFAGS SAGE YOUR FUCKING POSTS

>>402018

>Get out of there first, take her with you, then convince the mimic to join us and become our new partner in crime.

FTFY

“How long would it take,” I ask, “for you to get back to the boat and grab the potion?”

“A few hours,” Cleo responds. “I don't have any prepped. Even the simplest potions take time to brew you know.”

Staying here for that long would certainly get me caught. Which meant to access Cleo's hand liberating alchemy I'd have to trek across town carrying the mimic. But how could I do that without getting caught?

“Aright, can you find me a sheet or something, to cover her up.” Cleo nods and slips out of the room with practised silence. By the time she returns I've just about managed to wrangle my shoes on single-handedly.

She presents me with a plain white table-cloth. Perfect. Theodore would probably be able to recognise his own daughter if we passed on the street. If he could also spot his own table-cloth at a glance then I'd severely underestimated the man.

With the chest concealed, and my free hand protected by the cloth, the two of us scurry out the front door. There's no sign of the lizard girl, nor any other guards. The midday sun is at its zenith, and it seems the heat is keeping most people indoors. Even so Cleo sticks to the quieter streets as she guides me out of Randhiem.

My cargo attracts a few glances but by some goddess granted miracle no one stops us to ask about it. At least until we reach the city gates.

The guard on duty is an older looking man, with a five o'clock shadow and a glass eye. As we approach he bars the way using the blunt end of his halberd.

“What's under the cloth, kid?” he asks. My mind pounces on the first lie the stone suggests.

“Cake,” I say.

“Cake?”

“Definitely. It's cake day at the, um, orphanage. It only comes once a year, so we have to make this delivery on time. Or all the poor orphan hearts will shatter.” The guard cocks an eyebrow.

“Yeah, no. This town don't have no orphanages.”

“Please forgive my boyfriend sir,” Cleo interjects. “He's a little thick. Always messesing up our guilds codes, you know. What he meant to say was; The manticore venom forces the bashful man to rise to the occasion."

“Ah,” says the guard. I hope that phrase means more to him than it does to me. “You two are alchemy weirdos then?”

“Yes sir,” Cleo confirms, reaching into her pocket and pulling out several vials filled with colourful liquids. The guard nods approvingly.

“Carry on then.”

We make good time across the plains surrounding the city, back towards the river. Gradually the stone walls of Randhiem shrink on the horizon.

“I thought you said you weren't part of the alchemists guild?” I say once we're a safe distance from the city.

“I said I wasn't a member. Not that I'd never been one. Can't believe it's been two years and those idiots still haven’t changed their passwords.”

“Well how come you're not any more? Sell a couple of potions a week, as a licensed alchemist I mean, and you'd be rolling in barons.”

“It… doesn't pay as well as you'd think,” she says, scowling up a storm. I don't ask any more questions. No reason to risk upsetting the cat girl, especially when I need her talents to free my arm.

Cleo's boat is just where we left it. The ramshackle raft sits dangerously low in the water once loaded with three occupants. Moves slower too. Still faster than walking at least.

The journey down river takes several hours. I'm not sure where exactly we're going, but it's in a direction away from Randhiem and my parents, so I wasn't going to object.

Most of the trip is swathed in boredom. There's only so much I can do on such a small raft, even if I had both hands. Some investigation of the mimic reveals that the table-cloth isn't stuck to her. Not sure why it had been spared my hands fate. Maybe the adhesive doesn't work on fabric. Or maybe since the chest is magic its sticky factor operates on moon logic. Either way, I use my free hand, teeth, and some help from Cleo's tail to tie the cloth around the chest.

Hopefully that would stop the mimic making any sudden appearances.

My feline accomplice spends her time performing alchemy. A single beaker holding a slimy red liquid sits bubbling away. Occasionally she stops to count coins, sorting the score from our heist into two even piles. Eventually, after triple checking her maths, she pushes one pile towards me with the sole of her foot.

“Two hundred and fifty barons?” I say. “Seems my rates have gone up already.”

“Without you I'd be enjoying the guards hospitality about now. It's good practice to award your apprentice when he purrforms.”

“Well Meowstress,” I dip my head and jokingly lower my voice, “I live only to serve your whims.”

She purrs and leans forward, eyes half lidded, “You should keep that up. If you do your next reward will be much more fun.”

“Is it a potion to free my arm, by any chance?” I really hope it is. Holding my arm out like this was really starting to ache. Cleos ears droop.

“No I meant.. forget it.” She checks her potion. “It looks done. Should work. I think. But if you use as is you'll have an itchy rash for weeks. Hold on.” She grips the rudder, guiding to boat to a stop on the bank among some reeds. The only cover available out in the plains. “I need to find some juniper to balance the ratios out,” she says hoping from the boat. “Back in ten.”

She scampers away, leaving me alone with my thoughts. Watching her do alchemy had made the past few hours bearable, how was I to starve off the boredom now.

Well technically I have access to thoughts that aren't my own. Maybe the magic stone can provide amusement. Holding it in my palm I can hear it prattling on about the lock on the mimics chest. Honestly I had expected it to focus on the mimics other chest but I digress.

Hang on a second.

Locks. Thieves were supposed to be good a picking those. This was a great opportunity to get some practice. It wasn't like I had anything better to do with my trapped hand.

Normally, I assume, you'd need lock picks. But the mimics lock was almost comically large. Easily spacious enough for a finger or two. I wonder what kind of key it was meant to receive?

I lube up my trapped hand, shift it over to the lock, and slip the tip of my forefinger inside. I expect to find cold metal. Instead it's the opposite. Fleshy and warm. I needn't have bothered wetting my finger, the inside of the lock was already slick with fluid.

Trying to ignore the strange sensation I focus on what I do know about locks. They had pins, right? That I was supposed to push. My finger explores further in, rubbing the walls in the hopes of finding the right places.

“H-Hey!” someone squeals. The whole chest rattles. I jump too, having momentarily forgot that it held an occupant.

“Oh, you're awake.”

“Well of course I am,” the mimic huffs, “you would wake too if some vagabond was… never mind. Just cease and listen. It's not to late for you to do the right thing and carry me home.”

“Uh huh.” My finger keeps exploring. I figured out sneaking by myself, I can figure out lock picking too.

“I'm serious you m-miscreant. My f-father is a very important merchant. When they catch you, and they will, you'll spend the rest of your days behind bars, but-”

I slide my digit in further until I reach the knuckle. The whole lock tenses, gripping my finger. A promising sign? The mimic makes a noise that sounds halfway between a moan and a yelp.

“B-But if you turn yourself in, I'll personally see to it that you spend the rest of your days locked in with me. Instead of the dark, dingy dungeon y-you deserve.”

I continue teasing and stroking the lock without any idea how effective I'm being. Starting to feel like a man attempting to escape a pitch black room with no exits. I hated to concede defeat, but maybe I did need someone to teach me this.

“Besides, if this p-paltry effort is all you can muster I've no reason to worry. Have you seen a lock before. Do they even have them in whatever hovel you come from?”

With a frustrated sigh I withdraw my finger. I can practically taste the smug in her voice. It would have been nice to dip my toes, or finger, into the world of lock picking without a derisive running commentary.

I look down at my hand. My finger is coated in musky purple slime. Wonderful.

“Good,” she says, “now that you've seen reason we move onto everything else you've got backwards.”

“Such as?”

“For a start, I'm the one whose supposed to be stealing you. I'll admit I'm impressed you got the drop on me, but you're only hurting yourself. You'd be much happier in here with me than alone out there.”

I pause, pretending to consider her offer. There's no way I'm entering her physics defying box. She's so associated with the merchant guild that it would only be a one way ticket back to my parents. Not an acceptable outcome, not until I've found my inheritance.

But what am I supposed to do with the mimic, once Cleo frees my arm. If I left her here, or the next city, she'd tell the authorities which direction I was running in. Yet dragging an uncooperative monster around long-term was an even dodgier plan.

What can I say to convince her to cooperate?

>>402247

>What can I say to convince her to cooperate?

The answer is obvious. Keep finger fucking attempting to unlock her keyhole until she relents and her chest unlocks. She was clearly at a disadvantage when we were doing it earlier. Just ignore her complaints, and go to town on it until Cleo gets back.

>>402247

Cleo's got this. In the meantime, the absence of boobs means there is but one thing you can touch THE STONE COMMANDS YOU

>>402250

>>402247

What kind of pathetic thief would give up after only one try?

Stick in 2 fingers, then super thoroughly feel all around that keyhole until she relents. Tell her you won't give up until she unlocks her chest, and all of her booty belongs to us!

>>402247

Obviously a big lock requires a big pick. Stick your dick in, or use more fingers.

>>402247

You will need someone for teaching you mundane locks, but you have a huge advantage here. If she's not coming out on her own, that means she's actually stuck at the moment (rather embarrassing for a mimic really), and she's totally at your whims right now. The way I see it is you have two options. You can either dunk her in the river and demand she let your hand go or else she can stay down there (not advisable) or you can keep fiddling with the keyhole, but this time, follow an in-and-out moment along with pressing various spots. The more she moans yelps, the better the spot. Start off a bit slowly bit continue building speed until you're acting as if you're trying to stuff coins that are overflowing from a pouch back in as you're trying to tie if off. All the while, just start teasing her with words, maybe throw in a few mercantile terms to really throw her off (basically tease that her father has nothing on you without giving away who you really are). Also, use two fingers, or three if you can manage it.

BUT DO NOT USE YOUR DICK

>>402256

Yes! WE MUST ACQUIRE THE BOOTY!

>>402246

>>402247

>“You should keep that up. If you do your next reward will be much more fun.”

<“Is it a potion to free my arm, by any chance?”

>“No I meant.. forget it.”

That Was Free Pussy!!!

You Just Spaghettied Free Pussy!!

>>402264

>Out of character

Give it time, anon. It's still a bit early for that. However, I'm pushing hard for a full harem this CYOA. Beginning with the mimic booty. ;-)

>>402267

I want to know how the stone handles that.

>>402269

We explain the process as detailed as possible

>>402265

So am I, but I'm not being a dumbass about it. Monsters have some sense of honor especially when it comes to marriages. You can't build a harem by dicking the first vagina you see here.

>>402282

Gotta start somewhere. But I'm certainly not expecting to build one over night or anything.

>>402265

>haremfag

Disgusting

>>402324

>no sage

ooof

>>402324

A harem of thieves would be great. Polygamy is not the end of the world, as long as all the wives are cared for properly.

I'd once read that having people believe in you was more uplifting than any drug. At the time I'd dismissed that as a naive statement, written by an author who hadn't seen the sea of barons that flowed through the drug market. But now, with the stone's advice and encouragement surging through me, I could attest there was some truth behind it.

Ultimately the stone was right. Giving up after only one attempt would be pretty sad. I was certainly going to face harder trials than this on my journey. Yielding here, faced with a problem this simple, would only set a bad precedent.

Still, trying the same thing again and expecting different results would be foolish. I needed to change my approach somehow. H'mm. The mimic herself had seemed affected by me probing her lock earlier, the two must be linked more deeply than I initially thought. Perhaps if I could throw off her mental game the lock would be easier to pick.

What could I say to do that though?

>>402256

>maybe throw in a few mercantile terms to really throw her off (basically tease that her father has nothing on you without giving away who you really are)

Hey, that was a good point. The mimic was rather found of flaunting her father's position. Yet in terms of clout he was a poodle next to my metaphorical dragon. Unfortunately she didn't know that, and I couldn't let her find out. Giving the mimic my true identity would be a disaster.

Her father is Theodore Cabinsprain, and I know frustratingly little about the man. I pull out the objects I pilfered from his house in the hope they'll tell me something about him. The pocket watch is unmarked and unenlightening. But the cutlery I stole is all engraved. Made in Vistan they read. Vistan. That was a large forested area further east. Its main export was lumber.

And the biggest exporter of lumber in the area was Theodore's Timber Emporium! That must be her father's firm. I may not know much about the man, but I knew plenty about the business he ran.

Perfect. Now it's go time.

I press two of my fingers against her lock. They should fit easily, especially with how lubricated its become.

“Hey, wait just a minute,” she says “I thought we were past this part.”

“Well I gave it some thought,” I say sliding my fingers all the way in. She stifles a yelp. “That's when I remembered that we thieves are a tenacious bunch.”

“That's not t-true,” she says through gritted teeth, “thieves are cowards who withdraw at the first sign of opposition.”

“Well, if that was really so, I would have run and left the cat girl in your clutches. Right?”

“F-fine. You understand loyalty, I'll grant you that m-much. But, ahh, that only leaves you a single step above the c-common guttersnipe.”

I do my best to follow the stones advice. My two fingers slide in and out, in and out, gradually picking up the pace. Each time I curl them in slightly different ways, spreading the locks surprisingly malleable walls. Although I don't know how it's supposed to help, my thumb caresses the area outside.

The mimic tries valiantly to silence her gasps and squeaks, but as I continue they only increase in volume. That was surely a good sign. An ordinary lock clicks as you make progress. I guess a mimic moans.

The purple liquid has all but drowned my fingers. It trickles down the front of the box, pooling on the raft below. I do my best to ignore the scent that accompanies it, even as it makes my head spin. This might be some sort of mimic defence technique, designed to distract a would be lock pick. I couldn't let it deter me, not while I'm still making progress.

“So,” I say, “do you think your father will come for you, like I came for the cat?”

“Don't be, uh, ridiculous. O-Of course he will.”

“Really? I mean lumber prices have been in free fall for a few years now. Can he really afford to finance your rescue?”

“Why do you even k-know, I mean, that's i-irrelevant. He has savings.”

“Well, I was just assuming that most of his savings went into his attempt to diversify last year. Into the textiles market, was it? Disaster, at least from what I heard.”

The mimic whimpers softly.

“And isn't the Mayor of Vistan planing to introduce new labour regulations. I guess that's still a few months away, given he hasn't announced it publically, but that's sure to sky-rocket your fathers variable costs when it arrives.” The mimic gasps again and this time I don't think it's because of what I'm doing to her lock.

“How c-could you possibly, you're supposed to be some d-dumb hoodlum, not this, uh, shrewd. I can't b-believe you've even gotten me this close, ahh.” Her lock tightens around my fingers again. Victory is near.

“Y-you know w-what? Fine.” she says. My fingers are suddenly and unceremoniously ejected from her lock. It clicks open. “If…” she takes a moment to catch her breath, “if you're this eager to open me up then so be it.”

I gaze down at my arm. It's not only my slime coated fingers that are free from the mimic. My hand is no longer attached either. Praise the goddess, I've got two functioning arms again.

Now that it's unlocked the mimics chest opens slightly. The table-cloth I secured around her prevents the lid from opening more than a few inches. Just enough of a gap for me to see her flushed cheeks and heavy breathing. Before I can consider my next move, two purple tentacles snake out and wrap themselves tightly around my arms.

Come on, I only just got one of these back. I try to pull them free but the tentacles have an incredible grip. Already I can feel a strange, yet not unpleasant, numbing sensation where they touch my skin.

“I had hoped to resolve this amicably from inside my chest,” says the mimic, “but if this is how it must be then tell me. What was step two of your master plan?”

>>402671

>What was step two of your master plan?

Remain calm! Tell her that you're going to convince her to become your partner (in thieving). Where was she really going with her life just working as a guard for her father? Was she really happy doing that? Wasn't that super boring and unfulfilling? We'll offer her a life of adventure and excitement (and thievery). How does that sound?

Tell her what >>402672 said, plus that we should practice and polish our lockpicking techniques more.

>>402671

This >>402672

But also, if she hesitates, remind her that keeping to her father's path may inevitably lead to her living on the streets with him. He might be able to save the family from ruin, but what does she think that might cost, hmm? A mimic is much more than a living chest to catch would-be thieves. Just where does she think she'd end if her father got real desperate to save his business? At least sticking with you and the cat burglar, she knows it's all business. Keep concise and on topic, you don't have a lot of time with those tentacles wrapped around you.

To be honest, I'm not sure if it'll work, but she might also be a good tutor for learning about more mundane locks. If she ask why, just tell her you have business further down the line and that you really could use all the help you can get. You'll have to come with something in return because I doubt she'll just do it out of the goodness of her heart, but there's one thing to remember for this part of the negotiations

DON'T GIVE HER YOUR DICK (or hand in marriage since that seems more likely with her)

Let's just forget about the missed opportunity of a sword tutor with the lizard for now. We'll have to make up for it later. Once we get the mimic on your side, we'll just need the sword tutor and someone to help you learn about magic. Not necessarily the use of it, but at the very least being able to find magic locks, wards, and other nasty anti-thief magics.

>>402675

We'll need to find a new lock for that at the moment.

>>402676

I should also note that right now, she is technically the captive of a bandit. Depending on how things play out, she could be seen as either a hostage for unknown ends, or a runaway abandoning her family. You COULD leave her behind and she'd just have to wait for rescue, but without any supplies how long could she last? Would anyone even come for her if her father does go bankrupt somehow? If she can teach you how to picklocks you could leave her somewhere where she would get a ride back home after she's done, but does she have the money to hire a ride? Would she end up having to sell herself to a lonely man to get back. She pretty much has no choice on what to do at the moment. Sure she could make a fuss at the next guards post, but that would just guarantee you leaving her behind. Which just leads back to the problem of how would she get home? Sticking with you could mean she could at least look for a suitable husband on your journey (that's her own prerogative though), and really, would taking you as a husband look good for her father? His daughter runs off and marrying a bandit; that would just ensure he is ruined. Who would trust a merchant who consorts with bandits? The merchant could've easily been hiring the bandits to rob people who just bought from them to make as much profit as possible. If his daughter did marry a bandit, it would only push people really hard toward believing that.

Also, just to add insult to injury, just tell her "Better a guttersnipe than a merchant."

>>402688

>"Better a guttersnipe than a merchant."

LOTTA LOYALTY FOR A HIRED GUARD.

sorry ill stop now

>>402689

Or maybe she wonders why a bandit would kidnap her without demanding a ransom.

It's fine, but the guy is tied up by mimic tentacles at the moment so just jumping in isn't quite feasible yet. Besides, gotta show the rich bitch whose in charge for her to settle down.

>>402696

She couldn't drag us in, even if she wanted to. There isn't enough room for us to fit. She's just showing off and being stubborn, because she's confused about our intentions. She was impressed by us before or she never would have relented in unlocking her chest. Now we just need to finish convincing her to join us. Ideally before Cleo gets back.

>>402671

The other fools are making this too complicated.

Just slam the chest shut, severing her tentacles!

>>402761

It would be smoother sailing with her, if we could talk our way out of the situation. But if she refuses to cooperate with us, then this sounds fine. Then we could seal her chest much tighter, and let her stew for a while. She'll come around eventually, or we can just leave her chest tied up on the front porch of an orphanage somewhere for shits and giggles.

“I just wanted to talk,” I say. “Face to face, that is.”

The mimics eyes narrow in suspicion. Experimentally I try to shift my trapped arms. Her numbing tentacles feel soft and squishy, but their grip is rock solid.

The stone suggests I drag her around. I can't help but fear, disarmed as I am, that if our argument escalated to physical it would be me getting flung around instead. Perhaps I could follow another of its ideas though, and should the mimic misbehave, slam the lid of her chest shut to sever the tentacles. With the element of surprise that plan seemed plausible.

“And what,” she asks, “do you propose I would want to discuss with someone like you?”

“Someone like me? Well, I may be a lowly guttersnipe. But better that than a merchant. Or a merchants guard dog.” Her tentacles tighten their grip. “Ow, just listen, alright? It wasn't my intention to kidnap you. I'll drop you off with the guard in the next town if that's what you want. But there in your father's house, stuck sitting around protecting his money, you didn't look happy. That's all I'm saying.”

The mimic is quiet for a while after that. I'm not sure if it's the revelation that she's not being held to ransom, or if my last remark hit close to home. Either way, even though I'm the one restrained, it feels like she's on the back foot.

Whatever she's thinking about though I do wish she'd consider it faster. The strange sensation her tentacles create is starting to spread up my arm. My eyelids feel heavy.

“Look,” I say trying to keep the conversation flowing, “there's two things I know for sure. That I'm on the most exciting journey of my life, and that I don't think I can succeed by myself. So you can join me on my adventure, or you can go back to your father and watch as he spirals into bankruptcy.”

“You are far more astute than I ever would have guessed,” she admits quietly. “Your right, I am dissatisfied with the work I do for father. But I can't just leave him. What kind of wretched daughter abandons her dad when he's at his lowest. I only wish I knew how I could do more to help him.”

“If you want to help your dad so much then getting kidnapped is actually a great option.”

“…you look tired thief. I think it would be better for both of us if you slept.”

“I'm serious…” I say, trying and failing to suppress a yawn “I've rubbed shoulders with merchants before. When they hear Theodore’s daughter has been snatched from his… his home by bandits they'll offer commiserations. He'll receive gifts, insider information, favourable deals and capital. Not because merchants are righteous, but… because they value the appearance of being so.”

She's silent again. My heads started to throb as though I've been awake for days. Who could have guessed a shoddy raft would ever look like such a perfect place for a nap. Shit, I am too close to passing out. I need to shut the chest. I tell my arms to do so, but they're so numb that they don't even respond.

“My names Quinton, by the way.” I murmur. Not really sure why.

“Amelia Cabinsprain.”

The siren song of sleep is too hard to resist any longer. The mimics tentacles slowly lower me down. A third one emerges from the chest and places a silk pillow beneath my head.

“Quinton,” I hear her say just before my mind blacks out, “I believe I wish to accept your proposal.”

…

Sometime later I wake. The sun has set, now the only light comes from the dying embers under Cleo's alchemy set.

Someone's put a blanket over me. My grandfathers sword, safe and unstuck, has been placed next to me on the raft. I reach out to grab it only to catch sight of two reflective cat eyes lying across from me.

“…Cleo?” I ask sleepily.

“What.” she whispers back.

“The mimic, I think she wants to-”

“I know. She already said. Save this for the morning. Or any other reasonable hour, you know.”

“But-”

“Night Quinton,” she says. I hear her roll over inside her sleeping bag. She had the right idea. It didn't feel like I'd slept at all. Whatever Amelia's tentacles were coated in must be pretty potent. A few more hours of sleep wouldn't go amiss….

>>402860

oof, what a choice! Best we learn more about this "new" fellow.

>c) Flint

>>402860

>a) Amelia

We should try to learn how she really feels about her current situation. Can she really be trusted to some extent?

Flint would be my second pick. But that can wait for now.

I already trust Cleo a fair amount, because we've earned her trust. But I have the same questions about her thoughts on us and our situation. I wonder if she's jealous of Amelia? She will have clearly smelled what we did to her.

>>402863

Thinking about it. Cleo and Amelia undoubtedly had a long chat about us, while we were unconscious. I wonder how that went.

Whoever we enter, give all npcs large bouncing tiddies

>>402866

*In the dream

>>402866

All the npcs?

Is that really what you want anon?

>>402868

the female ones at least. Everyone else if the dream command can't differentiate.

>>402860

I just want to point out that cleo seems upset about something that happened. It be nice if the other voices here kept that in mind right now.

As for dream viewing, I don't trust amelia to be so honest but I'm also curious as to what cleo is thinking. Flynt has proven to be a useful pawn to us so far with very little will of his own so looking into his dreams is pointless. I'm gonna have to go with cleo and see if we can pick up anything amelia might have said to her. It'd be nice to call her out and made flynt to look like a mind reader by extracting second hand info from her. I like it when things get complicated for the hero

>tl;dr, Dream dive into Cleo

Wait a minute…

We are a gestalt being, right?

We can just have different parts of us go into different dreams. The boob-obsessed voices going into Flint, the rest going into the other people.

>>402893

You may be made of many minds, but they're all interwoven. The magic that created you keeps all the you's together.

Otherwise if you could visit multiple dreams this wouldn't be much of a question. The only rational answer to which dream do we visit would be all of them.

b) Cleo

somethings not quite right.

b) Cleo

We've got more info on the others than her. Time to violate a cat's privacy!

>>402997

>Sage dropped

FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

>>402860

>b Cleo

Not even a close call, its obviously the best option considering who we need to find info on. Cleo is still the character listed we know the least about, the character that is the most secretive with hints to stuff never explained, and the character that is most potentially vital for MC's quest. All this combined makes looking into her dreams for her real intentions, glimpses of her past/secrets, and maybe an alchemy recipe or two seem quite rewarding. In comparison, we could look into flints memory to find out stuff he would tell us later anyways/stuff that isn't important for the quest, or look into Cleo's memory to find out stuff we could tell at first glance anyways like she is still not 100% on the deal, and most of the decision was because she was so thirsty for a guy. The most amount of crucial information can ONLY be found in Cleo's dream, so its obviously the best call.

You decide to view Cleo's dream.

Slipping into her mind you see a younger, much scrawnier version of the cat thief hurrying up a spiral staircase. She's dressed in an ill fitting olive green robe that would have dragged along the floor were she not holding it up.

Reaching the top floor, she takes a moment to catch her breath, and then knocks the door.

“Do come in Cleo,” calls a woman.

The room Cleo enters is perched atop a tower over looking a white mountain vista. The walls and roof are built entirely of glass. It was a view might have been breathtaking, if not for the heavy snowfall obscuring it.

Most of the floorspace is covered in thick rugs and blankets. Some are suspended from the ceiling to create hammocks. Only the stone surronding the alchemical fireplace has been left exposed.

“Did I do something wrong Mrs Fluffle?” asks Cleo as she seats herself upon a cushion.

The harpy sitting opposite gives her a soft smile. She's wearing the same style of robe, although it's green colours clash with her own blue and white feathers. Her face sports a set of thick circular glasses. It shows the signs of age, but like most monsters the flow of time has done little to diminish her beauty. Or the plumpness of her assets.

“No Cleo,” says Ms Fluffle, “This is just a routine assessment. Just relax, I'm sure you'll do fine. I've ground down some of the reagents you work with into powders. All you need to do is identify them by smell, aright? You too Cleo.”

A second Cleo enters and takes her place next to the first. This Cleo grins as though she was privy to some secret joke, even though her face is marred by dirt and cuts, and her clothes are scarcely better than rags.

No one but you seems to bat an eye at Cleo's doppleganger. That was just how dreams were though. Logic was strictly optional.

“Now Cleo,” says the harpy, “Can you identify this?”

The first Cleo leans forward and sniffs it, “That's Gallon Mrs Fluffle. It's used for flavouring.”

“Good, and this one?”

“Burminger Mrs. It's a preservative. Using to much can dilute brews though.”

“Yes. Now this?”

“Tweed. Used for, you know,” the first Cleo looks down at her feet and mumbles the answer, “aphrodisiacs.” Ms Fluffle nods approvingly.

“This one holds a special place in my heart,” she says, picking up some of the pink powder and rubbing it between her wing-tips. “In my younger years I was too bashful to ask Harold to bed, even after we married. So I'd slip some tweed into our drinks and we'd go for hours… Forgive me, I could reminisce for days, but we're here to talk about you. If it's not to personal Cleo, is there anyone you've got your eye on?”

The first Cleo blushes, “There is one guy…”

“Yeah,” say the second Cleo, snickering to herself. “We'll need something stronger than tweed to get his attention though. Cus he doesn't like us.”

“That's not true,” says the first.

“Isn't it? We've known him a day. Yet already he's found another monster to replace us with. A much prettier monster, you know. Bet the only reason he came to save us was so he could introduce himself to the mimic.”

“That's not true,” repeats the first Cleo. She sounds less certain.

The second grins and playfully sings, “Anyone with a nose can smell the truth.”

Mrs Fluffles expression softens.

“You two have my sympathies. But I'm afraid you need to finish this test. Could you identify this final powder?”

“That's…” begins the first Cleo before trailing off.

“Gren Berry,” finishes the second. “If anyone here ate that it would be a closed casket funeral.”

“Correct Cleo,” Mrs Fluffle sighs, removes her glasses, and then rubs the bridge of her nose. “I assume I need not remind you that lethal toxins are not covered until the fourth year of study. Neither of you should know what this is, unless of course you've been stealing books from the restricted section of the library again?”

Both cats remain silent. Their gazes roam every inch of space that the harpy doesn't occupy.

“I'm, not upset Cleo. Although I wish you'd ask before you take, if a lust for knowledge was a crime all the guild masters would be charged guilty. Your passion for alchemy shines through in all your work. The issue is that your advanced knowledge also makes an appearance in the work of your peers.”

The first Cleo tries to sink into her own robe. The second looks at her and mimes swinging from a rope.

“Be honest Cleo, have you been writing the other girls papers for them?” The first nods. “I'm afraid I'll have to tell the council. It's probable they'll expel you for this and sell your deed on.”

“Please-” the first begins to beg. Mrs Fluffle cuts her off.

“I brought you here first so I could explain your rational. Why did you do it Cleo?”

“They said that if I did their work for them,” the first sniffles, “they'd be my friend.”

The second Cleo throws back her head and laughs uproariously.

“Wake up,” she says, “neither of us deserve any friends.”

The dream ends abruptly. Cleo must have woken up, but with your holder asleep there's no way to view the waking world. With your mana reserves spent, there's nothing to do but wait out the night.

I was awoken the next day by the aches in my back. As it turns out, wooden rafts are a poor substitute for beds. My stomach is also lodging its own complaints. I don't know if its a side effect of Amelia's tentacles, but I feel as though I could demolish one of my mothers banquets single handedly.

Dried rations are still foul, ravenous hunger or no, but they're better than nothing. Two portions disappear down my gullet before I'm interrupted by a tap on the shoulder. I turn to find Amelia, her chest still tied and unable to open most of the way, peering out at me.

“Oh, morning,” I say holding out a spare ration, “did you want one?”

“No thank you, although I was in fact hoping to discuss food. Since we're now partners, consider this gift an affirmation of our camaraderie.” She passes me a sandwich through the gap. I take a peak at its contents. Toasted bread, ham, cheese, tomato, cress and mayo. My first bite confirms that it tastes as good as it looks.

While I eat the mimic explains what happened last night. Cleo hadn't been happy when she'd returned to find me passed out. Apparently she'd been ready to throw hands, or claws I guess, for my sake. That was good to know. I guess honour amongst thieves wasn't a fairy tail after. From the safety of her box Amelia had been able to explain the situation and calm her down.

“I don't think she's overly found of me,” Amelia concludes, “I did also prepare a tuna sandwich for her. It is easier to make friends on a full stomach. Alas I haven't seen hide nor hair of her all morning.”

“Don't worry… about it.” I say between bites. I doubt Cleo would just abandon her boat in the middle of nowhere. She was probably just out gathering alchemy stuff from the plains. “I mean, if that tuna sandwich is half as amazing as this one she'll warm up to you in no time.”

“Don't patronise me. There are no shortage of street urchins who can make a decent sandwich.” She tries to sound offended but I can just about glimpse her smile. “I would make something that better demonstrated my culinary capabilities, but I wasn't anticipating the need to stockpile ingredients. Not that I'd be able to fit a decent meal through this gap. Could you be so kind as to untie me?”

I ponder her request briefly. Freeing her might be dangerous, but leaving her like this is sure to ruin whatever fragile trust we'd been building. Besides, now that I'm reunited with my sword, I think I can take her. If it comes to that. I reach out to untie the sheets, careful not to touch the chest or-

“Meowning!” says Cleo, appearing behind me without warning. Before I can offer my own greeting, or ask where she's been, the cat girl is gripping my arm and dragging me away from the raft. “Lets have a chat.”

“Woah, hey, Cleo, slow down a se-” She clamps a hand over my mouth. There are bags under her eyes and her hair juts in every direction. Must have been a rough night.

“I know that you're still wet behind the ears,” she hisses low enough so that Amelia can't hear. “But fur real. She's a merchant Quinton. You can't trust her any more than you can unstick things from her.”

“Hey, not every merchant is as bad as you seem to think they are.”

“Why don't you pull my other tail.”

“Just, we can't possibly drag an uncooperative mimic with us everywhere we go. At least this way she's not resisting. And if she is planning to betray us what’s the worst can she do. Ditch us at the next town. Its like you said, she's a merchant, not a, I don't know, an assassin or something.”

“Fine. Fine,” Cleo throws up her arms in defeat. “I, you know, sorry ok. I didn't want to drag you out here just to whine like I don't owe you one. It's just. Today was going to be hard before you dragged her into it.”

“How so,” I ask. “Can't help if you don't tell me your plans.”

“If we keep heading down river,” her tail points for clarification, “we'll hit Thimblewick by noon. I mean your free to go wherever, you know. But now that I have the barons I need to get there to bail out my friend. If your not game it's fine. But I was hoping you'd help.”

“You expecting some kind of trouble?”

“Expecting? Nah. It's just when barons are changing hands only an idiot goes unarmed. My claws are sharp. But not as much as your sword.” She places her hand around my arm again, gentler this time. Her smile looks forced and her twitching tail betrays her nervousness. “Please?”

I recall Cleo saying she had no more obligations after she'd resolved whatever was up with her friend. If I aided her here then hopefully she would have no reason not to help me with my quest. Still I wanted Amelia's help too, right? The whole escapade would fall apart in the short run if those two weren’t on good terms.

So should I help Cleo help her friend? And how could I get cat and mimic to play nice?

Help cleo's friend. If this person is a girl feel up her chest.

>>403285

>So should I help Cleo help her friend?

Of course! Tell her you'll give her your full support. It's clear from her dream that she's feeling insecure about the mimic. So also hug her close and feel up some kitty titty.

>And how could I get cat and mimic to play nice?

Tell her you're really looking forward to having more adventures together with her, once she has helped her friend. And you hope that you can continue to rely on her. But you'd appreciate it if she could try to get along with Amelia.

Nice idea,

Also, please remember to sage

I think you can still delete it and repost saged.

>>403293

I noticed it after I hit send and really there's no point in doing that. Reposting saged won't force the thread to fall back to the position before the post was sent, and even though it's just copy and pasting it's really not worth the effort. Just be sure to keep calling us out on it.

>>403295

>Reposting saged won't force the thread to fall back to the position before the post was sent

I'm actually pretty sure that it does do just that when you delete the post. The thread goes back where it was before. If your next post after that is saged then it won't bump the thread. I actually think I'll go test that and report back. I recall doing it before, but I want to make sure.

>>403298

>>403295

Welp, I just tested and 100% verified that deleting your non-saged post will effectively unbump the thread and place it back where it was before you posted.

>>403288

>So should I help Cleo help her friend?

>Of course! Tell her you'll give her your full support. It's clear from her dream that she's feeling insecure about the mimic. So also hug her close and feel up some kitty titty.

Besides the intent to cop a feel, this is actually a really good idea. She's a lot more vulnerable than anticipated and that can become a liability if left unchecked. Knowing who her friend is is important but we can't ask about that right now, she's already in a pretty fragile state, no reason to give her any reason to think we're having any doubts.

As for playing nice with the mimic, that's a bit tricky to address directly. Let's also go with this voice's opinion.

Anyone else thinking that causing a little mischief for the whole region would be fun? We could try to get more merchants children to disappear from home like Flynt and Amelia have.

>>403300

There, wonder if it'll still bump it down this long after though.

>>403301

Not sure, tbh. I have only ever done it immediately after posting, then realizing my mistake. But it's worth a try.

>>403301

It didn't appear to unbump it. I guess it may be too late if other posts have been made afterwards. But it definitely works if you immediate delete the offending post before there are more posts. That is what I tested and have done in the past.

>>403301

BTW, you shouldn't just toss the idea of copping a feel. That's a lot less than we unwittingly did to that mimic, and Cleo's feeling jealous and insecure. What better way to show we care? ;-)

>>403285

do this >>403288, but instead pinch that feline booty when she next turns around or bends over.

>>403304

I understand that sometimes you get other points to come into your head after you make a post, but please try not to flood a thread with them. Also, who thought it was unwitting (at least on our part). I knew what I was doing when I agreed with fingerbanging the mimic, but it wasn't anything sensual for us, simply something to help leverage the situation in our boys favor. But we do have to make sure Cleo feels at least appreciated for what she does. So maybe giving her a little smack on the ass might help.

>>403285

>So should I help Cleo help her friend?

If that friend can benefit your quest, yes. Maybe try asking Cleo for a bit more info on her friend though.

>And how could I get cat and mimic to play nice?

Explain to Cleo that arguing with Amelia and not getting along won't help with either your quest or hers. Getting along may prove beneficial in the future.

>>403310

>>403311

smack of the ass and a grab of the tits

>>403285

we should help her get her friend back, also squeeze her buttcheeks next time she bends over. Trust us, this is not us being horny :^)

>>403285

Normally, a "What's in it for me?" should be thrown in here, but we already know what we're getting. Alchemical training and theiving experience. Just ask for extra training in exchange for helping out.

As to the mimic, well there's something glaringly obvious to say. The mimic now knows both of our faces. Unless Cleo is willing to detour to drop her FAR away, there'll be wanted posters all over with those faces on them. There is an option that removes that problem altogether, but I doubt Cleo would like it. Dump the mimic in the lake, and flood her chest. Failing that, the only remaining option is to play nice.

“Of course I will,” I say. “I've got your back Cleo.”

“Thanks,” she replies smiling a genuine smile. It's good to see it return after her weird behaviour thus far. Hopefully its just been her nerves talking. I'd be anxious too if I had a friend counting on me. Still, I can't help but feel that something else is bothering her.

The stone has its own hypothesis. It suggests she's jealous of Amelia. Was that it? I mean I'd had one conversation with the mimic, surely Cleo couldn't be that troubled by it. Then again she'd been fine before that talk, so maybe the magic rock was onto something.

I ask it for advice. Its recommendations all involve getting handsy, unsurprisingly. Yet perhaps that’s the kind of comfort a monster girl would need.

“Well, as a thief I'm not in the habit of giving things away for free. But for you Cleo,” I extend my arms to offer a hug, “You look like you need one of these.”

Cleo wordlessly accepts my invitation. Her arms snake around my waist while my own cross the small of her back. A fuzzy feline ear tickles my cheek as she rests her head on my shoulder.

I'd expected a quick embrace but Cleo seems to have no intention of letting go. Seconds accumulate into minuets. I shuffle slightly, trying to send a hint, but my movements only cause her to grip me more tightly. It's not like I don't enjoy her warmth pressed against me, warding away the chilly morning air. Or the way her breathing strokes the back of my neck. But we can't do this all day.

“Say Cleo, haven’t you got a friend who needs helping?” I ask. She mews some non committal noises into my shoulder. A dark thought crosses my mind. “Hey. You best not be rooting through my jacket right now.”

“Should I not be? Two hundred and fifty barons to play for in your pockets you know.” Cheeky cat. Two can play at this game.

My hands slide down Cleos back and over the curvature of her hindquarters.

“You know apurrentice,” she purrs, “if that's you idea of a light touch I think my pockets can rest easy.”

“Let me try a different approach then,” I say as I squeeze the cat. Her ass is so round and tight. I guess climbing up and down buildings on the regular is going to earn you some muscle down there.

“We should work on your technique later,” she says nuzzling my neck in return. “You are right about one thing though.” Her tail playfully bats away my hands and she disentangles herself from me. The chilly morning air feels that much cooler without her. “We've got ground to cover.”

She spares a glance back towards the raft. Amelia probably can't hear us from this distance but Cleo lowers her voice anyway.

“Are you sure we can trust her Quinton?” I nod.

“Not completely. But, I mean, if she is trustworthy then it's a great boon for us. Another set of hands would be useful, be it today or in the future.”

“The future,” she says raising her eyebrows. “Planning on leeching off my skill long-term are we?”

“Well, your the one who said we'd be working on my technique later.”

Cleo doesn't respond to that, but her tail does swish merrily behind her.

The two of us make our way back to the boat. I check my pockets. Nothings missing. With that done I waste no time untying Amelia's chest. Hopefully our private conversation hasn't made the mimic too suspicious.

“At last,” she says, pushing the lid aside and stretching. Amelia has traded out near nudity for an elegant summer dress and floppy hat. I'm almost disappointed but now is not the time to be thinking about that. I need to make sure these two play nice.

Fortunately the pair seem to get on as well as I could hope. The pleasantries they exchange are polite, if a little stilted. Amelia presents her tuna sandwich. Cleo eyes it suspiciously and grumbles something about needing to start the boat.

As we begin our journey I take the time to explain today's job to Amelia. She tries to act disinterested, but it's a front even I can see through. It's obvious she's excited by today's prospects, even though paying a debt isn't the pinnacle of excitement. She's probably glad to be doing something that isn't guarding her fathers belongings.

After I give her the run down she disappears back into her box, this time leaving the lid propped open. Cleo as usual is engrossed in the dual task of steering the raft and practising alchemy. Two hours of travel pass by in near silence and I become certain of two things.

I need a hobby to occupy me on these trips. And I need a topic to talk about now, before boredom erodes my will to go on.

>>403313

>Maybe try asking Cleo for a bit more info on her friend though.

That will do. Thank you kindly magic rock.

“So Cleo, this friend of yours…”

“Red,” she says.

“Right. Red, is she a thief as well?”

“Not yet. She's like you, you know. In training.” Cleo sighs, “she's got a real knack for some of it too. If you think my slight of paw is good you ain't seen nothing yet. I think… I think you'll like her.”

I shrug. Not as though I could form an opinion on someone I hadn't met. Yet, if she was a friend of Cleos I doubt she could be that bad.

One of the cat girls beakers begins to bubble over. She curses under her breath and diverts her full attention to it. I'm left again without a conversation partner. Although, now that I think about it there is something I'd been meaning to ask.

“Hey Amelia?”

“You called,” she says emerging from her chest like some sort of buxom jack-in-a-box.

“Yeah, see, I'm just a little curious, aside from food and clothes what else have you got stored away in that chest?”

The mimic wastes no time rattling off her contents. Twelve outfits, a weeks worth of food, over thirty books, a workshop-

“Excuse me,” I interrupt, “did you just say a workshop?”

“Yes. I don't know why you look so flabbergasted. I have five rooms in here and, for your information, I'm not even close to capacity.”

“Five rooms?” I stare at the chest in amazement, “that's, just, what.”

“It's really not that impressive,” Amelia says waving her hand dismissively. “If it truly intrigues you though, might I offer you a private tour of my inner chambers-”

The raft bumps against the river bank cutting Amelia off again. As the whole vessel wobbles I flail my arms for balance and just manage to stay aboard.

“Meow bad,” says Cleo. “Forgot how narrow the river gets here, you know.” I look around. If anything the river looks wider. Maybe there's something below water level that I can't see. “Also,” she continues, “we're here.”

Having just visited Randhiem, Thimblewick is uninspiring in comparison. The settlement lacks any walls or defences, and consists of roughly sixty wooden structures placed haphazardly. The river runs closer to civilisation here than at Randhiem and so Cleo elects to moor us a safe distance from the village.

“Ready to go?” Cleo asks me.

“Wait just a minute,” says Amelia, “you two have yet to explain my role.”

“I dunno.” Cleo shrugs. “Guard the boat or whatever.”

“Absolutely not,” Amelia says, folding her arms and turning to look at me. “You said you were on an adventure Quinton. I want to be a part of that. What I do not desire is to wait around and again be serving as a mere watchman.”

She looks at me expectantly. What do I tell her?

>>403627

>She looks at me expectantly. What do I tell her?

Tell her you're not really all that knowledgeable about mimics. So you might be able to find a role for her if she could answer some questions. Is she able to leave her chest temporarily? Can she carry her own chest or somehow transport herself by another means? If so, how fast and long can she travel that way? Can she hide her chest with magic? Must she rely on other people to transport her chest? Does she have any combat abilities outside of what she has already shown us?

>>403630

>>403627

I should have thought about this before, but in addition to these questions for Amelia, we also need to Cleo for details on exactly what kind of situation we're going to be walking into.

Who does Red owe money to?

What kind of trouble can we expect?

What does Cleo intend to do if they added interest and she no longer has enough money?

We should be able to come up with a good game plan with all that info. And answers from >>403630.

>>403630

>>403635

i agree with these 2. Their are 2 things that we NEED to do before we go in.

1. What we are getting into. we need every detail to formulate a plan and a backup plan.

2. What a mimic can and can't do. this along with #1 can give us a picture of what her role might be. Also could we make a full furnished alchemy workshop in the chest for Cleo to use?

on a 3rd note when should we tell Cleo that we are a Ex-merchant? Be sure to say what she would want to hear.

>>403627

Time to group up for consul. We honestly don't know much about what the mimic can do out in the field. It doesn't seem likely we can actually use her as much of anything beyond base operations, but for some reason Flynt decided to offer her adventure rather than just refuge (though I think we probably should've been a bit more clear about what role to offer her, so that's partly on us). So talking should include what >>403639 mentioned.

>when should we tell Cleo that we are a Ex-merchant?

WAAAAY later. This is off the table till much further down the line. The longer we hold off on this the better. Besides, after kidnapping Amelia shit will get out of control real quick once word gets out that Quinton is actually the son of one of the most powerful merchants in the world. Besides, if shit gets real fucking desperate, we can throw someone under the bus and tell the guards one of them kidnapped Flynt while he was running away.

Ask for detailed plans so that you can assist we and feel up those boobs

>>403627

Do everything from these posts:

>>403640

>>403639

>>403635

>>403630

If Amelia is still miffed at being left out you tell her that this is just peanuts, the real Heist is much later.

>>403627

If the cat's just going to bribe some guards to release her friend or something, there's a way we can play this. Tell the mimic this is just an errand. While there will be more fun as we go along, not every job is going to be exciting. But some will be. Besides, we need to know what a mimic is able to do before we're able to plan a role for her.

Why do I get the feeling lizard guard is going to show up at some inconvenient time in the future, determined to get us for getting her fired and muddying her honor?

Amelias question wasn't easy to answer. Having been a thief for three days I still don't know the finer details. Without Cleo and a talkative rock I imagine my attempts at stealing thus far would have turned out very differently. Perhaps I'd even be on the way back to my parents right now. If I don't yet know how to properly play my role, how was I supposed to know what to do with Amelia?

The stone urges me to start asking questions. In one way it reminds me of my mother. Accumulating information was practically her hobby. I suppose that’s what made her a great merchant. Questions are a good place to start though. As a monster I assume Amelia has talents that I don't. Maybe with knowledge her role will become clearer.

I attempt to speak, but Cleo gets the words out faster.

“I dunno what Quinton promised you,” she says. “But we can't carry you around on jobs. Not unless you want us to enjoy a four by four with no windows together.”

“Did I suggest you would need to carry me?” Amelia asks. She holds out her arms and splays her fingers. Mimicking her gesture a half-dozen tentacles emerge. “These are useful for more than just subduing vagrants.” The tentacles divide, three to either side of the chest. Then working in tandem they lift it up and carry the mimic to the river bank. The way each one moves in sync reminds me of the way a beetle scuttles about.

“I had an arachne maid in my youth,” Amelia continues, “She felt it important that I learn to walk like so by mimicking her.”

“Well, that's way better than what I'd imagined,” I say. Both monsters give me a quizzical look. “I mean I'd expected you to have to get out and carry your box or something. Actually on that note, this might be a dumb question, but can you even leave your chest?”

Taking an actions speak louder than words approach Amelia hops out of her chest. Seeing her like this I'm pretty sure the mimic could pass for human. She does a quick twirl that transitions into an elegant curtsey. I resist the urge to bow in response, suppressing the years of etiquette teaching I'd received in my youth.

“Two hours and twenty meters,” she says.

“I… what?”

“Those are my limits. I can be outside my chest for that long and go that far from it. I must express preference for not testing these values, homesickness is a dangerous aliment for a mimic.” She seats herself on the grass. “I speculate that now is a good time to answer any other queries you might have.”

I think for a moment. The stone supplies some questions before I even have to consult it.

“Can you disguise your chest in any way?” I ask.

“To a certain extent. Do you have preference for any particular type of wood?”

“Ermm,” that wasn't a question I'd been asked before, “mahogany has a nice colour I guess.”

The wooden surface of her chest ripples like water. I watch as its light brown colour fades away, replaced with the rich red hue of mahogany. Even the metal decorations around the edges rearrange themselves and, while it might just be my imagination, I swear the chest has gotten slightly smaller.

“I can do stones and metals as well,” Amelia says “Although I should clarify that my chest only takes on the appearance of the material, not their properties. A boon of course, no natural substance is as stalwart as a mimic's chest.”

>>403639

>Also could we make a full furnished alchemy workshop in the chest for Cleo to use?

That is a good call. I've spent enough time watching Cleo to deduce that alchemy was not meant to be performed on a small, constantly tilting raft. However, to borrow a phrase from the alchemists, I think this idea should be put on the back burner for now. Until mimic and cat feel more comfortable around each other at least.

Instead I decide vocalise one of the stones other questions.

“How are you at combat. Any techniques I haven’t seen?”

“You've witnessed my repertoire. Though if I may speak frankly, I don't know why you're asking for more. In a fair fight you would find yourself outmatched.”

“That's a bold statement coming from the one who lost.”

“You possessed the element of surprise. Without it, what else do you possess. A sword? I have a striking distance of eight meters. Simply put, you could never reach me.” Her one hand absent-mindedly twirls her hair, the other conjurers a pair of tentacles with a few quick gestures. Apparently she can do that even when she's outside her chest. “If you disagree feel free to indulge yourself in a brief spar and a long nap.”

I do disagree. All that time I'd spent being tutored on the finer points of swordplay hadn't been for nothing. I rest my hand on the hilt of grandfathers blade. If I was quick maybe I could-

“Are you two fur real?” Cleo hisses. The cat girl has been pacing along the river bank while I asked my questions. Seems she's run out of patience. “The interest on Reds debt goes up tomorrow you know. If that happens I'll have to go steal more goods. There's no time for all this prating about.” She points a finger at Amelia, “why do you even want to come so badly. We're just swapping the owner ship of a few barons.”

“Cleo has a point,” I say offering Amelia an apologetic smile, “I mean, I know I said there would be adventure, but today is just busy work.”

“If the task is so simple,” the mimic says, “why does it require two of you. May I be so bold as to suggest this Red owes money to persons more dangerous than the common banker.”

Amelia has a point. Who is Red indebted to? Cleo had wanted me to come along for my sword skills, that implied it was not business without risk. A few voices in the stone make themselves known, prompting me to ask.

“She calls herself Lady Kotoenoe,” Cleo says. “She's a kitsune.” My perplexed expression leads the cat girl to elaborate. “That means she's a fox girl Quinton.”

Somehow that name sounds familiar. Lady Kotoenoe. I couldn't place it but I knew I'd heard it before.

“My father sold several of our antiques to a Lady Kotoenoe,” says Amelia, “when our finances initially took a dive. Am I correct in assuming she is still a trader on the black market?”

“Yeah.”

Was that where I'd heard the name? I'd traded in the nicer end of the black market before, where I swapped forgeries and dangerous magic items. Still I can't recall any transactions I'd had with a Kotoenoe.

At least traders on the black market tended not to be that dangerous. Sure threats and shows of force weren't uncommon, but it was mostly sabre rattling. Trust was the most important commodity to be earned down there. Without it no one would do business with you. It didn't pay to make enemies either. Not when all it takes to topple your enterprise is one man with a grudge and insider information he's willing to pass to the guard.

Although it couldn't hurt to ask what this Kotoenoe has at her disposal.

“Suppose we do have to fight her,” I say, “what would we be up against?”

“Dunno. Lady Kotoenoe has a lot of people working for her. But most of them will be out, you know. Doing said dirty work. Depends whose there when we call.”

“And you think it will come to a fight?”

“No. I wasn't lying when I said I didn't expect trouble. If I though it would end in violence I would have picked that scrap months ago. Not sat on my paws paying Reds debt. Bringing you I'm just hedging my bets you know.” Cleo looks up at the sky. The sun has just past one o'clock. “We need to get going.” She glances at me. “So you two figured out what the mimic supposed to do?”

>>403852

>“So you two figured out what the mimic supposed to do?”

It may not be much of an adventure at this point. But it's definitely less boring than sitting on the raft waiting. The real adventure comes later.

But I suppose she can come along, if she wants. For the time being she can just ride in her chest or walk alongside it. If a walking chest in the town would draw too much attention then she could carry it herself or carry it alongside us. Since her options are pretty flexible, I see no reason she shouldn't come.

>>403852

This is a good set up really. Amelia can still help her father out with this act and the fox can help misdirect any search parties that might come soon. Have Amelia go with and say something that would look good to red for her family. Quinton on the other hand is slightly less helpful here, if it's found Flynt is actually there, a reward for his return would be too great to not turn him over or at least help the search find him. Not saying Quinton shouldn't go, but he needs to take the backline and not draw attention. Wearing his mask wouldn't help here and I don't think we have any other disguises ready, so it may be best to wait outside. Can't tell either of the girls this but we do need to go along as well. As for the misdirect, if she asks, we're headed South and we just got slightly detoured. If the girls ask about your odd behavior, just tell them you'll explain later.

Also, is this the fence Cleo mentioned never gave a good price for her stuff?

>Have Amelia make a show of helping her father with this, by helping out a known contact.

>Quinton needs to keep unnoticed to the kitsune.

>false lead for search parties: South

>>403852

We now have a bit of a problem. No matter what we do, there's some risk.

If Cleo goes alone, she has no support if they try to steal her money. If Mr. Fancysword or Amelia goes, they may be recognized because of their merchant heritage.

The least risk is if Amelia goes with Cleo because news of her kidnapping has probably travelled less. However, I doubt Cleo would like it.

If disguises are an option, maybe both can follow Cleo discreetly?

>>403918

Yes, go disguised, and feel the situation out. The Intel could be critical in holding the mission together.

Worst comes to worse feeling up random boobs will make a good distraction.

>>403912

>Also, is this the fence Cleo mentioned never gave a good price for her stuff?

Cleo will confirm that this is correct.

>Have Amelia go with and say something that would look good to red for her family.

I assume you meant for Amelia to talk with Lady Kotoenoe? Because even if Red becomes debt free she's not in a position to solve anyone’s financial woes.

>>403934

Misread that post, Red and the fox aren't the same person so that threw a lot of my planing out. Amelia being there was going to be a show of charity even though Cleo would actually be paying. But since I got things mixed up, Amelia being is actually a bit more of a liability than I orignally thought. Now we need to come up with something else. If Amelia is seen bailing red out it would not look good on her father. Cleo would probably be happy about that but it would make Amelia less cooperative and possibly turn on us sooner.

>>403852

Amelia and Quinton carry the chest (no tentacles!) while Cleo carries the barons. If Cleo objects, switch places with her. If Amelia doesn't like it then too bad; we should keep Amelia's species a secret unless we need her in combat. Best to keep a trump card face down.

Leaving Amelia behind to guard the fort would be overly similar to life with her father, which we just convinced her to abandon. Doing so right after she joins the party could sour her on the whole thing while her participation in a successful operation would cement her attitude of being one of the gang.

“Amelia is coming with us,” I say, speaking slowly so I can talk and plan, “But we'll have to cover up the chest, and you'll have to carry yourself Amelia. So you pass for human I mean. If the worst happens a surprise mimic might be the trump card we need to salvage the situation.”

“Very well,” Amelia says smiling enthusiastically, “I shan’t let you down.”

I give her the briefest of nods, my real focus is spent parsing through the ideas the stone is providing. I can put together a good plan with these. I hope. But it all hinges on one final question.

“Cleo, where will you and Lady Kotoenoe be meeting? Somewhere private?”

Cleo shakes her head, “Public. You know, kinda. The Lady likes to conduct her legit business where people can see. At a tavern she owns. Calls it the Vixen's Hospitality.”

“Aright.” I lean forward. The girls eyes are fixed on me. “Here's the plan…”

The three of us, I explain, will show up at the Vixen Hospitality individually. Me and Amelia first, then Cleo will arrive to pay the debt. If all goes smoothly then we walk out with Red, and no one will even know we're all associates. It trouble starts me and Amelia should be close enough to aid Cleo.

“With all that said,” I conclude, “well. I'd appreciate some sort of disguise. Amelia do you have anything like that stashed away in there?”

“I don't believe so, but I'll take a gander none the less,” she says disappearing back into the chest. Cleo closes the lid with the tip of her claw before sliding over to where I'm sitting.

“Is something up?” I ask. Her nose twitches.

“You smell nervous.”

I couldn't say she was mistaken, although it wasn't today’s task that was making me feel anxious. Yesterday my mother would have found out I was missing. By today the best bounty hunters in the trade would be stalking my trail. Stuck as I was to a mimic my thoughts had been preoccupied. But now the stones talk of heritage and the need for a disguise had pushed the reality of my pursuers to the forefront of my mind.

The cat girl places her hand on my thigh.

“I'm not kitting when I said I owed you one Quinton. And I've dumped all my problems on you. So you may as well return the favour.”

I didn't want to lie to Cleo, but now wasn't the time to reveal my true identity to her. She needed to keep her focus on helping Red. Perhaps though I could express my concerns about being hunted without delving into the life of Flint Haybarrow.

“Well, I am a little worried they'll be sending people after us. Bounty hunters and the like. I mean we did kidnap a merchant's daughter.”

“Hey. Don't drag me into that. I just wanted barons. You're the one who swiped her.”

“I'm serious Cleo. They saw the two of us leaving town yesterday with something chest shaped covered up.” Cleo rolls her eyes.

“A chest full of alchemy supplies. Remember?”

“I'm just saying, were I that guard, once I learned there'd been a kidnapping, I'd view us as pretty suspicious.”

“Guards stop loads of shady types every day. Besides.” She stands up and points towards the village. “See Thimblewick over there.” I nod. “Doesn't look like much right. That’s cus it isn't. To small for the messengers guild to set up their magic relay. Even if the Randhiem guard has us pegged for mimic smuggling no one out here will have a clue.”

That was a small relief. Especially since it didn't just apply to incoming communications. If I were recognised in Thimblewick the news would have to travel out the slow, mundane way.

“You know I was thinking today I'd be the twitchy bundle of nerves.” Cleo says.

“Well,” I give her a playful tap on the shoulder, “you should have seen yourself this morning.”

“Yeah,” she rubs the back of her head, “was just worrying about something stupid really…”

The two of us wait in silence on the riverbank, enjoying the ambience and each others company. Soon enough Amelia emerges from the chest, presenting a pair of wide rimmed hats.

“I'm afraid none of my dresses suit your body type,” she says with fake melancholy, “But I can at least offer these. Tell me, do you express preference for beige or caramel?”

The three us decide to play it safe and approach the village of Thistlewick separately. I make a brief jaunt north to ensure I'll be approaching from directly opposite the river. Once I'm in it doesn't take long to find the Vixen's Hospitality. Even without Cleos directions I probably could have done it. The tavern was the centre piece of the village, almost as though the other constructions had sprung up around it.

I'd expected a tavern owned by a black market dealer to be a hive of scum and villainy. Fortunately the crowd inside looks mellow rather than bloodthirsty. The Vixen's décor mixes the traditional trappings of a country side tavern with more oriental designs that had just started to cycle back into fashion. A weird combination, but somehow the two elements meshed well. If I were here to see Lady Kotoenoe on merchant business I'd have requested she hook me up with her interior designer.

Amelia has arrived before me. I spot her seated, cloth concealed chest at her side, among the taverns liveliest crowd. They're all engrossed by a game of cards. The idea of joining them is tempting, but sitting as far away from Amelia as possible is the rational choice. So I make like every fictional rogue and find a chair alone in the shadiest corner.

The alcoves around my table are filled with various oddities and nicknack’s. A stone mask with a feather headdress, an oil painting of a potato, and a wooden dragon carving. The colossal, city smashing, princess kidnapping version of myth, not the scaled monster girl. Despite their uniqueness I doubt any of the pieces are worth real value.

I hadn't planned on buying any food. Maybe just a drink. But looking around the Vixen's Hospitality is giving me a case of food envy. The plates look appetising and I suppose I'd appear less suspicious if I had a meal in front of me.

It doesn't take long to attract a waiter. A small monster comes skipping over with a smile so bright it could have competed with the sun. I'm no monster expert, but if her hairless tail, large ears and short stature were any clue then I'm looking at a mouse girl.

She's wearing an apron as you'd expect. But the battered top hat she's also donned gives me reason to do a double take. It's in shambles, literally falling apart at the seams, but the mouse girl doesn't seem to mind.

Her unusual attire continues, as she's also sporting a bulky metal collar. In fact, now that I pay attention most of the staff here seem to be wearing them. Electing not to comment on her interesting fashion choices I exchange my barons for the promise of food and drink.

322 barons remaining'

“Say mister, can I interest you in our cheese board,” asks the mouse girl.

“I… don't remember seeing that on the menu?”

“It's not yet. But the lady said if I sell enough she'll put it there, see.”

“Well I-”

“We got all the bestest ones. Gorgonzola, Brie, Feta, Manouri, Jarlsberg, Dovedale-”

“Are you making some of these up?”

“Nuh uh. They're all really real and really tasty. Please mister. Please. Please!”

I hand over the baron. Some pouts are just too cute to say no to.

321 barons remaining

The mouse girl removes her top hat in a sweeping motion and bows before scurrying off to the kitchen.

Disappointingly Cleo arrives before my food does. Her pink hair makes it easy to pick her out of the crowd, as do the friendly greetings given by those she passes by. I guess the cat girl is a regular here. She spots me out the corner of her eye and gives me a barely noticeable nod.

I wonder if she's going to stop at my table but the cat girl sticks to the plan and carries on to the next one. There she quietly exchanges a few words with a… horned woman? Well a monster of some sort. I hadn't paid her any mind thus far. Partly because she didn't have a collar, and so I had assumed she was just another patron. But mostly because I felt like some sort of voyeur just looking at her.

The amount of under boob the horned woman’s crop top exposed was bold, to say the least. And her only other item of clothing, a pair of tiny shorts, didn't leave much to the imagination either. She drew a puff from a long, elegant looking pipe, before sliding open a set of paper doors for Cleo to proceed through.

Said doors lead to a small side chamber and, praise be to the goddess, I've somehow sat in the perfect spot to view it. Although the horned woman shuts the door behind Cleo, I can still make out the cat girls shadow conversing with another, who I can only presume to be Lady Kotoenoe.

With no idea how long the negotiations will take I decide to run through my options,

A) Hold course. Stay here and watch. Remain vigilant.

B) Get closer and try to eavesdrop on Cleo's conversation.

C) Go join Amelia for a game of cards. It looks like they're having fun and, based on the players drunkenness, I could win some barons.

D) Talk to the horned woman. She might be important and right now she's guarding the chamber Cleo is in. Maybe I should go find out what her deal is.

E) Wait for the mouse girl to return and offer to share the cheese platter. Maybe with such a bribe I'd be able to find out some information.

Obtain the cheese platter and bribe the horned woman. (Also feel up her boobs)

>>404223

I'm not sure I can count the ways this is set up to be a clusterfuck, but i will try.

The hat is better than nothing since at least nobody will immediately recognize you but you're still suspicious as fuck.

Second, sitting in the dark corner by your lonesome may get most to advert their gaze but that bouncer is definitely keeping an eye on you right now.

Amelia, while not a terrible idea with keeping suspicion off her with the cards, is relying on you to be lookout so getting yourself distracted with that game is a no go. Also, she's in a dangerous spot in case one of the patrons decides to get uppity and may need your intervention to protect her, which will raise some flags for the guard.

Again, you're suspicious since you got the hat (presumably) covering part of your face and sitting in a corner so getting closer to eavesdrop will just get the guards attention on you even more. But staying far as I think you are will not allow you to get the drop on her if worse comes to worse.

But I do see a silver lining in this. The cheese platter and the mousegirl will probably help you keep suspicion low as you get closer.

Ask the mousegirl about the guard and see if you can use any info to act a little more friendly with her. This is, of course, a ploy just to non-nonchalantly get you closer.

Although, that collar has also got me interested. Any chance that it indicates "indentured servitude"?

>>404223

>A) Hold course. Stay here and watch. Remain vigilant.

Begin eating once your food is brought. But otherwise just keep alert and inconspicuously keep an eye on their meeting. As >>404227 said, sitting off by yourself was a stupid cliche idea, if you're wanting to blend in and avoid notice. If you act like a rogue, then you'll be treated like a rogue. Don't do anything to draw attention on yourself. Don't leave immediately when Cleo does, unless she seems to be in trouble. Remember to get a better disguise for future use. Cheap plain unnoticeable clothes, preferably. Pretending to be a regular laborer, sitting at a regular table, is worlds better than what we're doing now.

>Although, that collar has also got me interested. Any chance that it indicates "indentured servitude"?

It's none of our business, but that's all but certain. I would not be surprised if Red shared a similar fate. But we're thieves, not some kind of heroes.

>>404223

You'll be able to see if weapons are drawn, so you should be fine as is. Get closer if you're able to without seeming suspicious, but otherwise stay and minimize your profile.

Keep an eye on the guard, too. You'll need to be able to sneak attack her if shit hits the fan, and she may be receiving silent orders from hand signals or something.

If you're desperate, you can feign that you need to find a chamberpot as an excuse, depending on what you need to do.

>>404243

>Get closer if you're able to without seeming suspicious

Impossible. That would be extreme suspicious. We are probably already under suspicion from the guard since we decided to LARP as a rogue instead of blending in like Amelia.

>but otherwise stay and minimize your profile

A much better plan.

>Keep an eye on the guard, too

Only if we can in a very nonchalant way. She is also keeping an eye on us, and she'll notice if we eye her too much, which will only increase her suspicions.

>>404241

>It's none of our business… we're thieves, not some kind of heroes.

Fair enough, just thought that if there was some way to set up our own information network we should try. If they were slaves we might be able to buy one, later if not soon.

>>404243

>>404244

>>Get closer if you're able to without seeming suspicious

>Impossible. That would be extreme suspicious.

Which is why I suggest using the mouse girl to ask a bit about Ms. Horny (pun intended) and feign interest in her. With any luck she'll be too busy working to oblige any flirting, and if she does oblige she politely states she already has a husband and we can just act slightly creepy with less (rightly pointed) suspicion.

>>404251

Buying a slave isn't the worst idea. But not here. We need to stay low profile. If we can leave without drawing anymore attention on ourselves, then perfect. We already stand out way too much. We'd be noticeable to bounty hunters, if they were around. Best case scenario, Cleo's deal works out fine. And we leave town the same way we came in, being careful to ensure we aren't being tailed before heading back to camp.

>>404223

>a

Nothing has happened yet for us to really get involved or make any moves; just eat your cheese and observe.

>>404222

>Lady Kotoenoe the fox girl

You took that from Monster Girl Dreams didn’t you?

>>404241

That collar could be more than just a slave indicator, at best it shows they are owned by powerful people that don't like their slaves giving info to suspicious rogues, at worst it could be magic and trying to get info out of her automatically sets the guard to defcon 3 towards you.

A) isn't the best option, its the only option. Everything else has a chance of fucking this up with minimal potential returns.

>>404709

At least you're honest. For future reference, deleting an unsaged post will unbump a thread back to wherever it used to be in the cateloge. But only if it is still the last post in the thread. So you fucked yourself out of it by immediately replying, instead of just deleting the post. After deleting then you can make another saged post like normal and you've fixed your fuck up.

>>404223

>E) Wait for the mouse girl to return and offer to share the cheese platter. Maybe with such a bribe I'd be able to find out some information.

That mouse waiter might be able to provide more info on Lady Kotoenoe, such as her reputation on the black market and if she can be trusted, and if you can multitask it, carefully watch the fox chick's chamber while conversing with the mouse.

>>404557

Not intentionally. But I did play it a few months back. Apparently that name was lurking at the back of my mind.

If I'm going to unintentionally rip something off, at least I choose something good.

>>404227

>sitting in the dark corner by your lonesome may get most to advert their gaze but that bouncer is definitely keeping an eye on you right now.

>>404241

>sitting off by yourself was a stupid cliche idea

Aright, aright, I concede that the stone has a point. I assumed there was a logical reason why Rubin Hood, Dick Turpine, and all the other fictional rogues sat in the shady corner of every tavern. In hindsight it may be a convention that services style instead of practicality. I'll keep this in mind for the future.

In the present though at least my seat gives me a good view of the Vixen's Hospitality.

Behind the paper doors I can see that the silhouettes of Cleo and Lady Kotoenoe have seated themselves. The latter is pouring them both a steaming hot drink. Beverages are a good sign at any negotiation, but I need to keep an eye on them regardless.

Over at the gambling table Ameila grins smugly as she scoops a small pile of coins towards herself. No one else at the table seems upset by this, if their expressions are anything to judge by. Over the din of the tavern I even hear one of them congratulate her on a hand well-played. I can see they're playing with low stakes, using regents rather than barons.

Between hands Amelia takes glances in Cleo's direction. She's checking less often than I, and from that angle the view probably isn't all that enlightening. Thus it falls to me to be the main lookout.

Of course the two of us aren't the only people surveying the room. The horned woman watches events play out with a vacant expression. Hopefully she's less suspicious of me than the stone fears, just in case though I don't risk looking at her directly, and so only do so via my peripheral.

Eventually I spot the mouse girl returning. She weaves between tables, my meal in one hand, cheese platter in the other, and my beverage balanced atop her hat. Now I have a choice to make.

The stone had narrowed down my options, but the voices are tied between just watching, and asking the mouse girl some questions. The second choice was riskier certainty, but I still didn't know why the name Kotoenoe was familiar and that was vexing. A chance to learn more was tempting.

Besides going into the merchant's house to bail out Cleo had been a risk and that had turned out well enough. What was the worse that could happen.

“So,” I say as the mouse lays the dishes out before me, “it's always a lonely affair eating by yourself.”

She stares at me blankly.

“I mean, it's going to be hard to eat all this cheese alone.” A look of realisation dawns, and without hesitation the mouse girl hops into the chair across from me and stares expectantly.

“Really mister? Usually no one gives me the good stuff.” I nod. Two cheese chunks disappear into the mouse girls cheeks. She glances round the crowded bar, “it's not so busy right now see.”

“Well,” I ask, lowering my voice so as not to be heard over the bars ambience, “if it's not too much to ask I mean, I… may not look it but I do take an interest in fashion. And that collar of yours is definitely eye catching.”

“This?” she says pausing her desolation of the cheese board. “You wouldn't want to wear this mister. No no no.”

“Uncomfortable I take it?”

“Magic,” she says leaning forward so that I can see the small runes inscribed upon it, “if I go outside see.” The mouse grips the edges of her collar makes a series of gurgling noises.

“It suffocates you?” Talk about draconian punishments. No wonder Cleo didn't want to visit this fox monster alone.

“No no. Only until I go to sleep. Then I get dragged back her and have to dig for a week.” She pouts, “Then my hands get covered in blisters and I can't practice my tricks.”

“You have my sympathies.” I'm slowly picking through the fish dish I ordered. Should probably try to make the meal last so I can skulk as long as possible. “Got to say though, your employer sounds awfully strict.”

“Yep. The Lady's really mean, even though she always smiles.” The mousegirl leans forward and whispers, “Cleo says I'm not supposed to talk about this, but she says the Lady’s grumpy cus she lost a big fight really long ago and-”

She stops abruptly. Her hand hovers, completely still, above the empty cheese board.

“Oh no,” she squeaks, pulling on her hair with both hands, “I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to eat it all.”

“Hey it's-”

“I'll get some more. Really quick. Please don't tell. Please. Please!”

“Look,” I place a comforting hand on her shoulder “I'm not that bothered. Honestly I think you enjoyed that dish far more than I would have. I've no intention of getting you in trouble.”

“It was your cheese though,” she says downcast, “I didn't mean to be mean. Oh, the Lady will make me dig for sure if she finds out. I, wait.” She snaps her fingers, “What if I showed you something really, really cool! Then we'd be even right?”

“Well…”

I spare a glance at the silhouettes. Both cat and fox seem to still just be sitting, talking and drinking. Does it really take this long to pay off a debt. Perhaps Lady Kotoenoe is one of those irritating traders who insists on at minimum thirty minuets of small talk before business can be discussed.

“…Sure I guess. As long as I don't have to go anywhere.”

The mouse girl exhales a relieved sigh and claps. A deck of cards appear in her hands. She begins to shuffle with such finesse my eyes can't follow any of it, and I'm not stranger to card games.

“Pick a card,” she says fanning the shuffled deck before me, “Any card. Oh and make sure you don't tell me see.”

I grab one from the middle of the pack. The six of crows.

“Now give it back. Yep, thanks. Prepare to be amazed.”

The mouse girl begins to shuffle again, somehow even faster. She throws up her arms, sending the cards fluttering through the air. In flagrant disregard for probability each of them lands face down on the table.

“Your card…” she sweeps her arm over the table dramatically “… is not here.”

“Oh no,” I say with mock concern, “you lost it? But I'd become oh so attached.” I may be enjoying this performance more than I should.

“Worry not. For the, the…” The mouse girl blushes, “I don't have a stage name yet so pretend I said something cool ok.” I nod. “…Knows exactly where your card lies. You see,” dramatic pause, “it's in your trousers”

“Excuse me?”

“I won't peek,” she says covering her eyes, “just check please.”

Uncertain, I turn my pockets inside out. The six of crows remains at large.

“No no no.” she says doing the thing she said she wouldn't between her fingers, “it's inside your trousers.”

Grateful for the wooden table covering me I slide my hand below the waistline. Sure enough my card is there.

Ignoring the implications of how it arrived there I ask, “Was that actual magic?”

“No see. All you have to do is… Wait a tick, a magician never reveals her tricks.”

Before I can discuss magician ethics further, or any topic at all, a shout from the other end of the bar distracts both of us. In fact it attracts the attention of nearly every patron. A man, far to drunk for early afternoon, is cursing out a waiter with insults so inventive I regret not having anything to take notes with.

The horned lady rolls her eyes, gets up and begins to stride across the tavern. Everyone who sees her coming hurriedly steps aside.

I consider using this as an opportunity to get closer to the paper doors where Cleo is still conducting her business. Some eavesdropping wouldn't go amiss. Unfortunately that would look far to suspicious to the mouse magician. And the horned woman may have her own questions should she turn around and spot me.

At least as a consolation prize this is a great chance to ask the mouse girl about her fellow employee.

“Her,” I say gesturing at the horned woman, “What kind of monster is she?”

“Oh. What makes you ask?”

“Not sure. Just curious I suppose.”

“It's cus she's really hot right?” the mouse asks. “I get it. I think she's hot too and I don't really like girls like that. Cleo says she's a succu… succubrine and that’s why everyone always stares. I keep telling her to wear a coat but she doesn't listen to me see.”

“Right.” I picture the horned woman’s empty expression. I'd always imagined succubi had more sensual visages. Maybe she's just having an off day.

She makes her was back to her post by the paper doors. Just being in the drunkards vicinity had sent the man scrambling out the tavern. Hopefully I don't find out how she acquired such a fearsome reputation.

The mouse girl claps her hands together, “I'm gonna do you a favour.”

“If this is still about the cheese, then consider that debt settled.”

“No no no, I think you're cool see. No one ever watches my tricks but you. So I'll put in a good word.”

“A good word?” I ask uncertainly.

“Yep. I'm a really good wingmouse!”

I realise a split second to late what the mouse girl intends. My hand barely fails to catch her shoulder as she turns, and I'm left watching aghast as she skips over to the succubus's table. A convenient lull in the tavern chatter allows me to hear what she says.

“Hey Reika, the nice smelling hat guy says you're hot. Oh and that your horns are really sharpish today. See, the Lady always says one compliment deserves another, so now you gotta say something really nice about him too.”

The succubus turns her gaze upon me. I shift uncomfortably. Her face is unreadable.

Eventually she shrugs and makes a come hither motion.

Damn it, what should I do?

>>405523

Try to use the position near her to listen in on how the catgirl is doing. Keep a hand at the ready to go for her chest in case a distraction is needed.

>>405523

Just couldn't your mouth shut and observe, huh? Chatting up the mouse was a good idea. Mentioning the bouncer was not. But you reap what you sow. Now you should go chat with that bouncer while trying your best to listen for any trouble for Cleo, without Reika noticing your lack of attention. Have fun with that.

>>405523

Well, rejecting her offer would be just plain rude and we don't want to be on her bad side anymore than we may already be, go on over and chat with her

>>405543

I doubt we're on her bad side at all. We were just a little suspicious sitting off by ourselves. Our antics with the mouse was probably more than enough to get rid of any concerns she had about us. But we also fucked that up by asking the mouse about her.

>>405523

As the others said above, just chat with her. Make sure to play it cool. Maybe you can try to ask about Cleo's meeting with her boss? (Of course while pretending to not know Cleo) Or is that too suspicious?

>>405557

That's too much, all we should be concerned with now is recovering from our mistake while monitoring Cleo.

>>405559

>>405561

All right.

>>405523

So just play it smooth

>>405561

We can play off the glances as ogling the succuhorn if need be, we cant ask about the meeting because that will for sure give us away. Just act naive sand we'll be good.

>>405564

By the way, you should sage your replies. Some anons tend to get mad if you don't in these type of threads

>>405564

>>405565

Read the rules newfags.

>>405569

You don’t even know why people should sage these threads. You only do it because you'll be called out on it.

>>405523

I bet this guy will spill his spaghetti. Well, as long as there's no hypnotizing involved, this might work if we stop the spaghetti spillage. Spying on the meeting should be easier, and all that's required is to play the bard. NO NOT LIKE THAT! We'll claim that though she is beautiful, the mouse did exaggerate a bit. We're a teller of tales, always seeking new ones. A girl with her reputation, she'd be able to be anywhere she desires. There's bound to be a good tale behind how she came to work for the fox here. In exchange, we can offer her one of the vast number of stories we have at our fingertips. Bet she'd like Wizardquest.

>>405583

It's so people don't see the thread bumped up, prepare themselves to enjoy a nice content update, and then see it's just your alp ass with some inane and meaningless post.

>>405523

Be chill. Whatever you do, don't make a fuss over it. If she asks why you showed interest or if you want to have fun later, tell her the truth: that you had never seen a succubus before and didn't know what she was. If her eyes start to glow, look at her hair to avoid charm spells.

also, The mouse girl used her tail to put the card in your pants.

>>405576

>pretend we're a bard

I'm not sure he's suave enough to pull that off

>bet she'd like the story about the shit wizard

How about no

>>405561

I wouldn't assume that they've realized as much about Emilia. She has been handling herself about 100 times better than Flynt has. Flynt has already fucked this up in just about every way possible. The only way he could fuck up worse would be by asking Reika about Cleo's meeting like >>405557 mentioned. Even though we have already brought tons of unwanted attention on ourselves for many stupid reasons (stupid hat that made us become marked as "hat guy", sitting in a suspicious place, asking about the bouncer, not blending in), I can't think of a worse idea than that. I see in >>405562 you accept that was a bad idea, but it's way too late to play it smooth. Any bouncer worth their shit will have realized we're an associate of Cleo. And if they are good, they'll even suspect Emilia as well, but be far less certain about it. But we should keep our mouth shut and try to maintain the tiny bit of dignity we have left. After this is over, I'd make fun of Flynt endlessly for his actions here, if I were Emilia.

>>405604

>Emilia

Amelia, I meant.

>>405599

Well, she'd like the parts with Selene. But yeah, in retrospect, maybe something else would be better. Fortunately, we've got lots of other tales.

>>405576

One fuck up after another, but it's not unsalvageable. First off, that card trick really should've set off some alarms.

>"Rule two. Watch your pockets." -Cleo

Unfortunately, I don't think this is a good time to check yourself in case she stole anything, or worse, left you a present. Might be able to casually sweep your person for large items (read: your sword) but even if you have lost, or gained, anything, you can't do anything about it right now. You'll just need to keep that in the back of your mind at the moment. Second, the fact she put a "good word" for you to the succubus is another warning for us. Now that you have gotten the attention of a single succubus who thinks you're interested in her, time to be as bland as possible.

>405523

Following the idea here, telling her you're a bard is not the worst idea you could do. Asking her how she came to this line of work or why she has horns ("I never thought succubi had horns") could be fine. If she asks for stories, I recommend avoiding telling too much about your grandfather, a slip of a particular detail that people would otherwise not know could give you away.

If she's dissatisfied working for the fox, you might let slip that Cabinsprain might be in the market for another guard. But let her bring up if she's looking for new work, don't try to initiate that conversation, that's just even more suspicious.

And here's a few things to keep in mind:

You look down, they know you're lying and up, they know you don't know the truth. Don't use seven words when four will do. Don't shift your weight, look always at your mark but don't stare, be specific but not memorable, be funny but don't make her laugh. She's got to like you then forget you the moment you've left her side.

As >>405599 said, be on guard for any enchantment shenanigans.

>“Cleo says I'm not supposed to talk about this, but she says the Lady’s grumpy cus she lost a big fight really long ago and-”

Well that's a cliffhanger right there. Too late to ask about it now but I have a feeling this has to do with your grandfather. Maybe ask Cleo about this later if a discrete moment to bring it up comes up.