Vision of Yaldabaoth

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Vision of Yaldabaoth † 05/15/20 (Fri) 14:27:24 857ccd No.833778

Just before Wu Flu, I was laying in bed. I don't know if I was dreaming or almost asleep, but in my mind I could see the far wall of my bedroom, and standing there was Yaldabaoth. I was baptised a few years ago now, and every day I try to improve and get sin out of my life. I fail, a lot, but ever since this happened I've begun drinking far more often , and I started looking at porn again.

I don't want to do these things, but it's like part of me is distracting me while I do these things. Then afterwards I just feel gross and horrible.

Yaldabaoth ever said that I was weak and would be broken. That I would be lost.

I don't know where else to talk about this, but I think about him/a lot too. Like I just keep saying the name in my head. I want it to stop. Can I get a prayer Bros? Also, any advice?

____________________________

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† 05/15/20 (Fri) 14:35:44 7d6786 No.833781

>>833778

Are you saying you're having trouble with unwanted gnostic thoughts, or are you a gnostic and interpreting a gnostic event?

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† 05/15/20 (Fri) 19:50:29 c74dba No.833805

>>833778

This is how the enemy operates. When offering temptations they pester you with thoughts that it doesn't really matter and you can always get forgiven, etc. Afterwards they pester you with thoughts that you can never be forgiven, are already lost, too weak to resist, have blasphemed the Spirit, etc. This is why the Church Fathers so strongly warn against despair as a dangerous sin. It gets you stuck in a pit. Repent, pray, and pay the enemy no heed. If you do see or hear things do not give them any of your attention. IGNORE THAT THING. If you truly cannot, try the advice of St Paisios: Thank it for reminding you to pray and then do so.

I do not have your particular problem but I can say that a little fasting goes a long way to help dealing with temptations and keeping a regular prayer rule in addition to praying throughout your normal day helps a lot too. Attend church if you are able and if you cannot set aside some time for Sunday prayers. Nevertheless go see a priest.

I am a weakling and a sinner. My prayers may not count for as much but I will pray for you as requested.

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† 05/15/20 (Fri) 22:40:06 251aee No.833811

Be at ease. Demons are stupid and all they do is project sound and images until you feel in their chains, albeit you can never truly be. If you struggle with pornography, then you are aware of it.

Hold to fasting and prayer (Matthew 17: 18-20), try to maintain a healthy body and healthy spirit, because they only thrive in bad soil.

God bless.

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† 05/15/20 (Fri) 22:40:59 251aee No.833812

>>833811

Sorry, it's Matthew 17: 18-21

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† 05/16/20 (Sat) 00:09:16 154183 No.833828

>>833812

I can confirm this.

I told the demon to leave in the name of Jesus. I returned to God, strengtened my faith. Every night before I sleep, I say The Lord's Prayer and I tell any demon around me on inside me to leave in the name of Jesus.

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