No.6965[Last 50 Posts]
Itt: tell us autistic stories like in the boyim autism thread. Don't be shy, this is an anonymous basket weaving bulletin board centered around chinese cartoons.
____________________________
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No.6969
My most embarrassing moment is, ironically, the silliest one.
It was in Sunday School. We were playing a game where we would stand up and pick up a letter: the one with the letter would then yell "here's a letter for XXX", XXX being anything like 'tall people', or 'people with red shoes'. However fit those descriptions, had to stand up and race to get the letter.
Me, trying to be funny, got the letter and yelled " here is a letter for dorks!". Silence and everyone looking at me weird. My hope and optimism: Gone.
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No.6970
>>6969
Female Kevin?
I mean I would have went for the letter.
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No.6977
>>6970
I thought people would laugh but alas, they did not.
I was "that girl" in Sunday School. Basically a weird bug.
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No.6978
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No.6980
>>6978
There's nothing to get. I was just stupid, that's the moral of the story.
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No.6985
>>6965
Did any of you bakas embarrass your selves around guys?
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No.6990
>>6985
>be me
>in 1st grade of highschool
>massive thirst for a 4th year guy
>lesbo friend knew about that, so she told the guy
>he comes to talk to me one day
>"hi" he said, standing on the classroom's door
>slammed the door quickly and run to the class' corner, hiding and playing with my GBA
>lesbo friend, laughing, tells him I shy
This bitch knew I would sperg. Yet she told him and guided him to the class. She didn't gave up there tho, she wanted to embarrass me more with him.
I liked platonic loves better. Just contemplate guys from afar.
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Post last edited at
No.7032
>>6990
This is why I never told anyone in school who I liked. Ever.
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No.7033
>>7032
Didn't mean to have a male flag.
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No.7037
>>6990
I bet that lesbo wanted to munch your carpet.
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No.7040
>>7032
I told my sis the same.
She didn't listened.
>>7037
If the forced anime-like kiss she gave me once is any indication then yeah, she wanted it badly.
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No.7062
>>7040
Did you like the dike? All the lesbo couples I've seen irl are not like the ones in movies.
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No.7064
>>7062
I did not, so I felt pretty uncomfortable. No confidence to tell her so, tho.
I did got with a girl later, but still.
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No.7067
>>6990
That's why dykes aren't worth jackshit.
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No.7075
>>7064
What compelled you to fug another girl? I'd imagine it would be pretty awkward to fug your own gender.
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No.7076
>>7064
>Did not liked kissing another girl
>Goes with a girl later on
Literally WTF is wrong with you.
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No.7092
>>7076
>All girls are exactly the same and if you don't like one you can't like any of them
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No.7099
>>7092
So you say you didn't liked kissing a girl, but you want to be with another girl which will eventually kiss you, even if you didn't liked it the first time.
Again, WTF.
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No.7101
>>7099
So by that logic every straight woman should be okay with ANY guy kissing them because they like to kiss guys?
You're not thinking very hard about this, are you?
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No.7102
>me, around 9yo
>little bro is always having these big sleepover parties with his buddies
>one night, the three of them wanted to set up a tent in our backyard and sleep there
>decided I'd join them
>comfy as fuck while it lasted, slept snug 'n' smug between two cute boyyos
>woke up the next morning in a pool of my own, warm piss
I hadn't had any bedwets for years before then, and never again after – but, of course, that has to be the time I spring a leak. Too much Mountain Dew before bed, I guess.
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No.7103
>>7102
Did this scenario affect your general relationship towards men? Did you become a whore in order to compensate your embarrassment next to a group of guys through orgies?
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No.7104
You got this completely sideways.
Let me simplify this for you: Why would you do something you didn't liked TWICE!?
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No.7105
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No.7107
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No.7108
>>7107
Answer the question, madam. You are under oath.
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No.7109
>>7102
>>7108
[anticipation intensifies]
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No.7110
>>7108
No, faggot. I ended up a friendless, obese shut-in for half a dacade.
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No.7111
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No.7112
>>7110
I guess it's better than whoring out into filth.
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No.7114
>>7110
Oh, then you deserve a pat on the head for not falling for hedonistic propaganda.
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No.7115
>>7112
iwouldificouldbitch.webm
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No.7118
>>7115
You know who to turn to.
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No.7124
>>7118
>worshipping a kike on a stick
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No.7129
>>7124
Better than being a filthy sodomite :^)
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No.7137
>>7115
free yourself from autism and release your inner hedonist, anon
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No.7147
>>7076
>>7075
I was 15 and experimenting.
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No.7148
>>7104
>>7105
It's a good thing she didn't kiss the girl that weirder her out before then, huh?
I wouldn't like eating a well-done steak, doesn't mean I wouldn't enjoy a medium-rare steak.
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No.7286
I'll share the story of a friend.
>sis has friends, one of them is the weird tomboy kind
>gets a crush on one of my friends, starts hanging around our group
>my friends are ultra-virgins so I'm the first to notice
>try to set them up toghether
>fail
>he has MASSIVE mommy issues
>keeps her "on the fence" for years
>after 4 years and many times they argued (privately, at least) he tells her he wants to try
>she says yes
>it lasted three days
And no one was left surprised.
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No.7288
>>7286
People can only change through their own accord.
Going into a relationship with someone you don't like/has issues they refuse to work on, is suicidal.
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No.7302
Every day I question if I should start looking for someone, then I see shit like this and I wonder if it's worth it. Should I try?
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No.7304
>>7302
This should have the opposite effect and give you hope.
After all, women can be as autistic as men sometimes.
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No.7305
>>7304
It's not so much the prospect of finding someone as austistic as yourself as it is searching itself. I've never dated, I have no previous experience, and I gave no attention to such things when I was younger. Now that I'm in college, I have no idea what to do, and I don't socialize as well as I used to. Plus, it feels like I peaked in high school, and now I'm obsolete, a has-been who has no chance with the opposite sex. All I do now is shitpost on the internet. With all of this, I just don't know if I can handle a relationship without fucking it up and being miserable. I'm sorry if this turned into a blog post, I'm very tired.
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No.7839
>>7032
teenagers are shitty people, i was happy to sit back and experience all the nasty shit vicariously through my dumb friends.
>>7305
if anything I've started to become much more socially adept in university and have been regularly making friends and talking with members of the opposite sex. kinda a bummer it took me till 25 to get here though.
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No.7840
>>7302
do not base how you think about broad groups of people based on your limited experiences on a Mongolian tapestry painting website. most people are not actually shrieking autists. so yeah go ahead and talk to people, but remember that thirsty is a bad look for anyone.
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No.7841
>>7839
Same anon as the second one. Things have actually gotten better lately. Made friends with a guy from Nepal, and socialized with a group of fellow freshmen (couple of girls in it, even). I think I was just broody that night.
>mfw 18
Guess I should count my blessings.
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No.7847
In Biology class going over the levels of organization of living things, I get called on.
>cells
>tissues
>organs
>organ systems
>orgasms
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No.7848
>>7847
every time i have a Freudian slip i just chuckle and say "i just had a Freudian dick", i think its funny so i cant help myself.
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No.7911
>>7847
Top Kek some chick in highschool said orgasms when she was answering a question. Was that you?
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No.8110
>>6969
I would have taken the letter
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No.8175
>tfw extreme social anxiety will always prevent me from getting a husbando
HA HA
TIME TO BE A CAT LADY
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No.8178
>>8175
If you're cute enough, you'll find soneone or they'll find you.
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No.8179
>>8178
i agree with this to a certain extent. it'll get her a way in, but from there, personality matters. i'm a homebody, so i'm not very social anyway. but to some, that's a really big deal
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No.8192
>>8175
Be unique.
Get another pet, like birds.
>>8178
>>8179
>Le "you are a woman so you can get someone" meme
Plz
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No.8194
>>8192
with the caveat of "if she's cute enough"
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No.8264
>>8175
I don't care how much of a ham planet you are. I'm desperate.
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No.8353
>>7102
girls, please post more stories like this
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No.8418
>>8192
Listen, when all you have to do is look/act cute to get a guy's attention, you're pretty fuckin well off. I'd honestly love a cute lil femsperg of my own, but that's probably not gonna happen any time soon.
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No.8430
>>8175
Anon-sama how is your attractiveness? If you are average looking I'm sure you'll find a boyo.
No need to buy a cat yet.
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No.8434
>>8430
>>8430
>cat lady
>a cat
thats not how this works, you have to be like me and have like 3 or 4 cats.
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No.8710
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No.8738
>>8434
>3 OR 4
You don't even know how many cats you have?
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No.8807
>>8738
>You don't even know how many cats you have?
>not taking care of all the strays in the area and fostering sick cats.
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No.9017
heres a story:
women in general score higher on autism scale an their norm is higher, than mens
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No.9046
>>9017
I have no idea what you wrote.
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No.9091
>>9046
theres a test. It tests for autism. U get points for answers. Theres a certain amount of "autistic things" ppl do, but doesnt make them autistic. Men do less of it. To not classify the general population of women as basically autistic, the norm, i.e. the range of points, had to be risen.
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No.9174
>>9091
I thought the boyim were significantly more likely to be autistic.
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No.9371
>>9174
try to include female "norm" as autistic, then
med to have higher % of autists statistically, otherwise
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No.9372
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No.9699
>>8353
>me, around 11
>qt kraut moves in next door
>develop massive crush on him
>want boyyo's undivided attention, dunno how to get it
>try bullying him – unsatisfactory results: brushes it off, moves on
>try bullying his kid sister instead (rubbed sand in her hair, forced a shriveled dog turd down her blouse, made her cry; standard procedure etc.)
>he beats the shit out of me for this, busts my nose open etc.
>cry like a little bitch and run home to tell mummy
>get him grounded for two weeks
>never faced any repercussions myself
>felt guilty over the whole ordeal 'cause it was all pretty much my fault
>see him sitting on the swings alone one late afternoon, first time anyone had seen him in those two weeks
>figured I should go apologize and give him a jumbo freezie to make up
>throws my freezie in the trash and tells me he'd kill me if I ever touch his sister again
>walks away, out of my life, forever
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No.9701
>>9699 (wasted dubs)
kek you're fucking retarded. I'll never get how grills think that showing hostility or similar vibes would somehow be interpreted into affection.
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No.9703
>>9701
It's called being a particularly immature eleven-year-old who can't into expressing feelings in a healthy manner, and young boys pull the exact same shit, believe me. Now, back to your designated shitting thread.
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No.9704
>>9703
>and young boys pull the exact same shit
Even below the age of 11 I couldn't manage to do such mental gymnastics, let alone have the empathy of a rock.
>Now, back to your designated shitting thread.
Make me.
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No.9705
>>9701
You're implying that bullying a crush is a girl thing, but I've honestly heard about boys bullying girls pretty much exclusively, I've never heard of a girl doing it to a boy.
at least you regret it, but I would have responded the same way
>>9704
Some do and some don't, I was always a really sweet kid and I could never imagine doing something like this, but it's not at all unheard of.
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No.9817
>>7147
>I was 15 and experimenting.
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No.9818
>boyim
You girls are alright.
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No.9843
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No.10483
>>6965
Oh boy do I have a lot of these.
>Be me, around 18
>live in an old smol apartment building
>hear the cat meowing from the building hallway
>I usually feed this cat so I go to grab some food for her
>The cat keeps on meowing
> "I'm coming, I'm coming"
>Still talking to the cat as I unlock the doors
>Open the door
>Get on the floor
>Everybody do the dinosaur
That was a bad joke
cont.
>Open the door
>Made the most awkward eye contact with some guy
>Panic
>Close the doors without saying anything
I was dying inside for about 30 minutes afterwards.
I didn't even feed the cat.
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No.10484
>>10483
>Everybody walk the dinosaur*
Couldn't even get my joke right.
The autism strikes again.
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No.10488
>>10483
Why would there be random cats roaming around apartment hallways?
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No.10558
>>10488
It's an old slavic building and the main doors are always open (no lock on it either).
There's always cats looking for shelter.
And well, the cat I mentioned knows Ill feed her so she comes there almost daily and meows until I do so.
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No.10573
>>10483
>>10558
I don't know what slavs think really but thats super cute, you sound like a shut in though which is fine tbh
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No.10576
>>10558
>she lives in an old commieblock
Kek I feel bad for you lass, genuinely.
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No.11406
Shitty blogpost
>Bullied and young
>Boy starts teasing me
>No idea if he's serious or making fun of me but I really really like him and he smells amazing
>Talk with my parents about what is happening in school and stuff
>They completely misunderstand me and call his fucking parents without me knowing it
>Everything is dead and I killed it
>Absolutely fucking hate myself for it to this day
>Our laughter turns into silence and the most awkward years of my life begin
>Avoids me like the plague
>The cold looks he was giving me and the sheer amount of kill me was unreal
>After many years the absolute madman actually tries it again
>Touches my leg
>Virgin mode activated
>Autistically flinch away
GoodJob.jpg
Much later
>Class reunion
>My ""friends"" are leaving and I'm sitting alone now
>"Hey anon!"
>It's him with the rest of the remaining people
>I stand up and smile
>"Yeah?"
>"You don't need that chair anymore do you?"
>I hold back my tears
>"No you can have it..haha…"
>I give them my chair and leave
>It is snowing and pitch black outside
>Became a hikki and contemplated suicide since four years now
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No.11448
>>11406
That made me real sad.
Try not having suicidal thoughts, my friend;
it will get better one day.
If you wanna talk gimme a whistle, i've been in your situation before.
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No.11453
>>11406
that's a sad story anon
>Became a hikki and contemplated suicide since four years now
drop that line just about anywhere to get an internet boyfriend
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No.11516
>>11448
Sorry anon you don't have a chance, I've come to offer you another option.
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No.12374
>>7101
>So by that logic
That was not even close to "by that logic."
>>7147
>I was 15 and experimenting.
I will never understand the corruption of that word until the day I die. When people say they were "experimenting," they usually mean "I did something stupid, and now I would like to stop talking about the stupid thing I did."
>>8175
>extreme social anxiety
>TIME TO BE A CAT LADY
Time to get professional help or medication or both. I take Cymbalta for mine.
>>10483
>That was a bad joke
Thanks for the clarification. For a minute I was afraid you had literally done a dinosaur and I was concerned that you might have gotten salmonella from it.
>>11516
Degeneracy.
>>9704
>(She can't, but I can.)
Snailgirl is best girl.
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No.12380
>>12374
>I will never understand the corruption of that word until the day I die. When people say they were "experimenting," they usually mean "I did something stupid, and now I would like to stop talking about the stupid thing I did."
Generally, yeah, you are right people don't wanna accept the fact that they fucked up in the past, so they prefer not to talk about it, It's kinda weird, since most people that say such thing tend to not get over the problem and prefer to just ignore it, aka, you are still fucked in the head.
>Time to get professional help or medication or both. I take Cymbalta for mine.
How are the side effects? My friend takes the same meds and he is being super lazy and fog headed lately.
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No.12387
>>12380
Anti-depressants are a fraud. You want to feel better when there's nothing actually stressful in your life (that's "exogenous" depression), you find time to cardio and/or lift. Not saying bear mode, just a little bit will do, I'm certainly not anywhere near bear mode. It'll help the pain, but ultimately being alive is a miserable existence anyways so just deal with the rest of it with your new found energy.
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No.12398
>>12380
>How are the side effects? My friend takes the same meds and he is being super lazy and fog headed lately.
Just a warning: you have now entered the TMI zone.
Your friend needs to talk to his doctor to find something that works for him, personally. Antidepressants affect everyone differently.
I first tried Paxil, which left me a zombie who couldn't ejaculate and my wife made me go back to the doctor because I nearly starved to death trying to decide what to eat one weekend when I was alone. So he tried me on Effexor which worked better, but it increased my blood pressure which meant blood pressure pills which mean I couldn't keep it up so I tried some other ones which I can't remember. THOSE lasted three days before I came within a hair of punching my wife in the mouth during an argument. I'm not an abusive husband, and I was able to stop in time, but she didn't understand what was going on and kept pursuing the argument until I was literally holding my hand down and begging her to stop. She managed to grasp what was happening in time, but I hate to think what would have happened if she kept harping at me.
So, back to the Effexor, and the doc agreed after hearing about what nearly happened. Later on, he said I might get better results with Cymbalta, so I moved to that. I never noticed much of a change, to be honest. The weirdest side effect I get with them is small jellied chunks in my semen for reasons I can't even begin to guess at. I went off them when we were trying for our second child.
>>12387
>Anti-depressants are a fraud.
If you mean they don't work, you're wrong. If you mean they're a quick-fix with nasty side-effects, then you're sort of right, but I've seen what happens when someone who really needs them decides they don't need them anymore. It's not pretty.
>but ultimately being alive is a miserable existence anyways
Amen.
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No.12598
>>6969
>nobody in the game decided to run up for fun
What a bunch of losers you had to deal with in that Sunday School, someone could have got up and made everyone laugh and have the satisfaction of being the cool kid comedien for the day because they responded to the dork call.
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No.14972
>>12398
>small jellied chunks in my semen
sign of low test. i know that feel.
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No.14973
>>12398
tramadol is a way better anti depressant most of the time.
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No.17177
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>11406
Suicide never improves anything.
Watch Jordan B Peterson's videos, I promise they will help:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-wWBGo6a2w&list=PL22J3VaeABQD_IZs7y60I3lUrrFTzkpat
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No.17178
>>17177
>This thread is nearly six months old
Sorry for the necro, but at least we have more suicide awareness.
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No.17179
I'm actually very disappointed in you guuurlims, I thought this was an autism thread but so far you can't compete with us penis-wearers. We actually autistic shit that haunts our minds but I'm seeing typical girl drama. Step up your shit.
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No.17185
>opening joint bank account with SO
>he's getting it done on the phone, I'm chilling, not paying much attention
>suddenly, hands me phone and says "They need your information"
>panic
>lady on the phone says complicated things and asks for my birthday
>say SO's birthday
>"oh, sorry, that's not it, I mean…"
>SO facepalming and mouthing the correct date to me
>say his birthday again, a second time
>bank lady becomes very confused, starts talking slowly, like I'm retarded, which I am, I apologize more
>palms are drenching the phone with sweat by now, please, just let this hell end, what if she thinks I stole someone's identity or something
>finally manage to come up with my birthday and finish the process
>red as a beet as I hang up and try to recover
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No.17186
>kindergarten
>nap time
>all kids sleep on beds inches from each other
>I never sleep, only watch other kids sleeping
>boy I like next to me
>he looks so beautiful and peaceful sleeping, I watch his chest go up and down and his chin twitch cutely for at least 15 minutes
>there's an eyelash on his cheek
>I MUST HAVE THIS
>reach out and steal his eyelash
>he wakes up, looks annoyed and says, "What are you doing?"
>"You had an eyelash…"
>gives me a murderous look, turns over in bed and never talks to me ever again
I still remember his name. I've stolen hair from other people, too, mostly girls. I like looking at the color and thickness of it.
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No.17187
>>17186
Ok you are dangerously autistic.
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No.17189
>>17186
Was this your first catch, or just the earliest you care to tell us about? This arouses me greatly.
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No.17198
>>17189
>muh dik
kys nigger.
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No.17199
>>17198
>not being aroused.
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No.17200
>Marketing class in college
>teacher talks about a company named "Purex" and accidentally says "Durex" once
>whole class is laughing out loud
>later find out "Durex" is a condom brand
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No.17201
>>17200
Is the autistic part supposed to be that you didn't know the name of a condom brand?
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No.17202
>>17200
>it's considered autistic to not be so slutty that you've fucked 20 guys by the time you're 14
Assuming you're really a girl, you're going to make a husband very, very happy one day.
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No.17207
>>17189
It's the earliest I can remember.
I also plan out my phone calls like that pizza ordering meme guy. I write down everything I'll say and all.
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No.17214
>>17207
Wow. Any autistic stories about that?
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No.18062
>>6965
>for the longest time cant look people in the eyes, still have some difficulty
>take things said literally when I shouldnt
>obsess over animals/dinosaurs/dragons
>flaps my hands when I get excited (curbed this mostly by now)
>be me
>13
>in middleschool, on period
>wearing khaki shorts
>happily walking about
>"Hey femanon the back of your pants is red."
>panic.jpg
>run to bathroom
>MASSIVE PATCH OF BLOOD
>freak out
>have no changes of clothes
>tell everyone that its kool-aid that I sat in and argue with people over not believing me until I can go home
>so embarassed I just throw the shorts away so mom wont wash them and see it
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No.18063
>>6965
>be me
>14
>have amazing Physics teacher, 30 something guy who is super chill and wears kinda loose dressy shirts and ties
>develop extreme crush on him
>think about him all through class
>hang out with him before and after class joking around
>become his favorite student, he gets so comfy with me he will openly comment on the stupidity of the negro students with me
>tells me he thinks I could cut it in research
>at the end of the year write him a letter describing how I feel about him and include my email
>feel sad when he never contacted me again
RIP
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No.18064
>>6965
>be autistic
>dad likes to make fun of my by convincing me of stuff that isnt real or convincing me real stuff isnt
>tells me that the best friend of his hes mentioned for years doesnt really exist
>freak out
>ask him how he could lie to me so often and make me believe this for so long
>he laughs, says he was joking, his friend is real
>then he says no for real, my best friend doesnt exist
>stare blankly
>have no sense of which one is true
>tism freak out ensues, ball up and cry
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No.18073
>>18062
>>18063
>>18064
Stop! I cannot handle anymore of the cute! Anymore stories?
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No.18075
>>18073
>be me
>be autist
>very sensitive to too much noise, get auditory sensory overload
>all my siblings are screeching
>feel sense of being overwhelmed by noise coming
>rapidly click pen in silent panic
>be me
>kiddo in 5th grade
>have crush on some boy
>tell my friend who ended up telling everyone
>sitting at the lunch table a short distance from crush
>he looks at me, laughs, and makes a mean joke about me liking him
>crumple into sadness and tears, put head on the table and cover myself up with my arms while I cry at school lunch
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No.18088
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No.18091
>>18063
I don't think there's much to be embarrassed about here, he was probably flattered, but understandably turned you down because you were still a kid.
>>18064
>dad likes to make fun of my by convincing me of stuff that isnt real or convincing me real stuff isnt
Thanks, now I have new method of trolling my sis.
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No.18098
>>6965
>be me, in school
>make friends with a boy I go to school with and live near, develop crush on him
>we are best bros
>he tells me about all his gf problems, I try to give objective advice even though Im dying inside
>hangs out with me all the time, we play very physical games with each other like chase/he drags me around/etc
>one day we're just chilling outside his house lying down when he lies his head on my chest
>omgimfreakingout.png
>"Hey dont tell anyone about this alright?"
>lie perfectly still dont want to ruin physical contact with crush
>it gets late and I have to go, awkwardly shuffle around before leaving
In an unrelated encounter with him, we were wrestling when I, wanting to impress him and prove my strength, punched him way too hard in the jaw.
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No.18105
>>18098
Whatever happened between you and him? Did he hit you back?
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No.18108
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No.18132
>>18105
No, he was just like
"Fuck that hurt, what the fuck?"
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No.18137
>>18132
Aww. A good fella would've at the very least given you a good scare. Intimidate ya. Maybe chase you around. A slav would return the blow.
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No.18151
>>18137
>A slav would return the blow.
Fuck off.
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No.18157
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