Heart of Stone

Email
Comment *
File	Select/drop/paste files here
Password	(Randomized for file and post deletion; you may also set your own.)
* = required field	[▶ Show post options & limits] Confused? See the FAQ.

Embed	(replaces files and can be used instead)
Options	Do not bump (you can also write sage in the email field) Spoiler images (this replaces the thumbnails of your images with question marks)
Allowed file types:jpg, jpeg, gif, png, webm, mp4, pdf Max filesize is 16 MB. Max image dimensions are 15000 x 15000. You may upload 5 per post.

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

Heart of Stone Christanon 01/08/19 (Tue) 22:57:30 264193 No.753543

Hey /christian/ how do I grow a conscious?

As I am, I can't really understand justice and right and wrong, and I am indifferent to my own welfare and that of others.

In Christianity there's this whole thing about atonement, justice, injustice, sins, sacrifice, etc. and I try very hard to understand it and yet can't relate at all. I don't see how the ancient Israelites necessarily did anything wrong and I especially don't see how wrongs could be paid for in any way.

I've been wanting to ask this question to people around me but people fear me enough as is without giving them another reason for them to do so so I'd rather ask anonymously in a place like this. I feel incomplete or lacking in the same way one might feel knowing themselves to be in the presence of one who can see a color they can not, or has a sense they do not. I don't even feel like a real human, I am that deficient, like some elemental being that is long lived but not immortal in the way man is and so covets a union with a man to gain his immortality.

I've tried to ask God for help with this. I've also tried imagining various indignities and terrifying scenarios happening to me to see if I could feel anything but I don't as well. Also imagining pets or humans being kind to me. Anything to stir me. I just feel cold as stone. You know how some people make a big deal out of butchering animals for their meat and cry and get emotional? That is just one example. There's also people that get upset over the death of another person like at funerals and such. Another is losing lots of money, I myself have lost so much, and although I can say with my mind it's a shame, I can't express nor feel anything about it. I just carry on like a machine and it disturbs people and makes them question things like "you just lost 7 thousand dollars how can you not care" and it is a hard time for me to explain, the best I can offer is "will tears and sorrow make any difference".

It seems to me to be an important part of Christianity that I must have functional heart and actually feel emotions beyond the terribly vague in order that I might be able to, for example, love God.

Christanon 01/08/19 (Tue) 23:53:16 de1265 No.753554

>>753543

>It seems to me to be an important part of Christianity that I must have functional heart and actually feel emotions beyond the terribly vague in order that I might be able to, for example, love God.

We love him, because he first loved us. - 1 John 4:19

God is love. Keep praying to God, and read the Bible. Learn about Jesus Christ, who is God manifest in the flesh.

We have come to know and have believed the love which God has for us. God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. - 1 John 4:16

Christanon 01/09/19 (Wed) 00:00:30 de1265 No.753557

File: 73d009263a49238⋯.jpg (71.99 KB, 508x613, 508:613, lamb.jpg)

>>753543

Do not love the world nor the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world. The world is passing away, and also its lusts; but the one who does the will of God lives forever. - 1 John 2:15-17

I am going to pray for you, anon. Sometime tonight, sit down somewhere quiet and pray to God in the name of Jesus Christ, and ask Him to open your heart to Him.

Christanon 01/09/19 (Wed) 02:36:56 fe6101 No.753616

File: acec6f3337c08f6⋯.jpg (202.88 KB, 762x960, 127:160, 10230.jpg)

>>753543

I would see your situation personally as a huge advantage. Many people, even religious, get too attached to people, things, their own well being, etc. Many of the saints spend their lifetimes battling in prayer to learn how to love God alone, or at least more than anything else in this world. The reason for this detachment, is because logically speaking since God is the Most High, and the Creator and Source of all that is Good, you might as well just go straight to Him, and by doing so you learn how to love how He does, and thus you can love everyone and everything the correct way.

So basically, you really have a straight line towards God, since you do not seem to be attached to anything temporal. What you should focus on, is not to try to feel emotions to try to fit in or anything, but use this blessing God has given you to completely funnel all that Love into God first and foremost.

Like, the fact that you are petitioning God, and desire Virtue, is extremely pleasing to Him; more pleasing than one who pities the death of a rabbit for the rabbits sake, is one who pities the death of a rabbit for the sake of Christ who gave life to that rabbit.

also, its important to know that Love isnt an emotion perse - Love is to will the good of another. So if you are drawn to Christianity for Gods sake, you funnily enough Love God, because you will to do Him honor that He deserves, you desire His Good.

Thinking about it, many saints teach that we sometimes have to learn how to love the visible, ie. our neighbor, before we can love the invisible, ie. God. But like, again this situation youre in seems to be a blessing from my perspective, because again, you can just skip the pitfalls of loving creature more than Creator. But this is provided you ask God to help you to love Him more every day

Tl;dr:

>>753554

>God is love. Keep praying to God, and read the Bible. Learn about Jesus Christ, who is God manifest in the flesh.

The peace of Jesus be with you.