/ausneets/ - Aus NEETs

Clive palmer

Reasonable bum bum

>>265997

He does look a bit like a toad

>>265987

Excellent op image

>>265987

I like gondola but nothing beats my boy peep.

Puppy dog da moscow gangsta

>>266003

shut up faggit

6 quints will be in this shitty thread

>>266005

maybe they can bring cheesey back

>>266002

I miss Dolan

>>266007

NK is the modern dolan

>>266004

Tone to ya dome busta nigga!

>>266010

I hope we are all invited to your house warming

goodnight c00nniggers

>>266012

Wonderful image

>>266010

nice stubby holder.

The unit sounds comfy, you could set up a backyard dunny and use your poos as fertiliser for your indigenous garden.

>>266013

vilenight whitedog

>>266017

Very relatable.

>>266011

As long as you pre lube all your assholes

>>266015

Yeah, it's in a shit suburb so I'll probably have to put punji sticks at the base of the wall like I did with my old rental in freo

Should have told work I would be starting at 10 tomorrow instead of 8. Woke up at fucking mid day today, might have togo buy some cheap wine to help me sleep.

>>266021

Boong

>>266021

Might have to get your shit together.

Misso yelled at me and went to bed because I slept through the first episode of Game of Thrones.

>>266024

it goes down hill after the first episode anyway

>>266021

Or to help you stay up till 8am

>>266025

It's like a gayer version of Lord of the Rings

>>266029

You need to let him watch.

>>266029

She looks like she cleans her room

>>266028

if you fried it yourself thats a Pauline Hanson / 10

you earned it mate

>>266029

>no elbows

DROPPED

>>266033

I see a very succulent elbow there neet

>>266024

Have you broached having Weber and poss over this weekend with her yet?

>>266029

she looks like she has a big penis

>>266025

wasn't there a coffee cup in the new episode lol

Imagine waking up to find an aboriginal uprising is taking place right outside your home

Worked today for 8 hours

>>266028

Very nice. Would go well with a green salad.

>>266024

She wanted to share something with you and you crapped on it.

>>266032

Deep fried the chips and onion rings, air fried the fish.

I am going shopping tomorrow. I might buy the necessaries for making some pea and ham soup. Maybe some lamb and barley soup too. Do I dare make two soups at once?

>>266043

Concerning as always.

>>266035

>two NEETs at once

What if they hit it off and I become the third wheel?

>>266041

Perhaps, I had it with aoili

>>266042

Hmm, yeah

>>266045

>lamb and barley

Never heard of that but it sounds good.

>that feel when incredibly nighttime depressed

I really enjoy my power rack time out in the shed. I find it very pleasant out there. I am thinking of setting up a bit of a kitchen out there. Maybe an old fridge and a cheap BBQ. Set up a comfy lounging chair. It might be relaxing.

>>266050

It is very good. A childhood favourite.

>>266052

Would be creating for hosting an Adelaide neet up.

>>266052

Always good to have more shed dwellers on here

>>266055

It is a great shed.

Aldi do a lemon meringue ice cream. They have got the taste so spot on.

It's amazing.

>>266036

Boong marx

>>266056

Everything in it gets really dirty and water gets in on one side when it rains. Plus birds and possums can get right in through the big gaps.

I wish it was properly sealed up then it really would be great.

>>266059

Abolf Boongler

>>266060

The high roof makes it feel like a fort,

>>266062

nofun you boong

>>266062

>NK and NoFun Fuse to hit some boong standard

>>266058

>>266057

I might give it a try. I haven't been to an ALDI before.

>>266052

Get a rape rack, I can fuck three boongs at once on mine

>>266066

really?

Not even when you were a kid?

>>266068

My dad used to give me ice creams as a kid, but they were warm and sticky and tasted salty

>>266063

Maybe that is how it will all end. I will have a mental health episode and end up besieged by the police in my NEET shed fort.

>>266068

Aldi didn't exist when we were kids.

>>266068

ALDI didn't exist then.

>>266066

They don't play music and everything is home brand. It's good.

>>266073

They are foreign owned. I don't like that.

>>266070

I'm sure you don't have those types of mental health issues. Not the type that require police assistance.

>>266074

So is everything else. They sell more Aus made shit than the others imo.

>>266075

No but how much pressure can a NEET live constantly under before he snaps?

>>266020

A good idea, can't be too careful. I wouldn't trust those white dogs not to come and nick your shit.

>>266021

I've gotta get up at 7 tomorrow. Earliest I've been up past week was today, 10:40.

>>266028

Is that calamari or onion rings? Either way

I haven't had onion rings in ages, they look good.

decent/10

>>266029

It's the crazy eyes.

>>266036

Nice improvement.

>>266039

I'd probably cheer em on, ask to join their militia.

>>266040

Good man.

>>266069

I loved golden gaytimes as a kid too!

>>266076

Made by Australian chinks

Bit nervous regarding this reassessment tomorrow morning.

>tfw stressed

>>266080

It will go fine. You are a very smart and capable young man.

>>266077

Hmm.

>>266071

>>266072

Aldi has been a thing since the early 2000s though

Don't tell me I'm the youngest one here 21

>>266078

>they look good.

They were good but there was too much. Doggo was pleased.

>>266082

Being serious, life isn't really that stressful these days. I have found the older I get the less I care about things.

>>266081

T-thank you NEET, I was not expecting such reassurance. Just need to shake off the gitters.

>>266083

There's apparently someone younger, some NEET keeps reporting him.

But yes, you are in the NEET fort of dirty old men.

>>266085

I wish I could let go and not care, I stress about the smallest shit but then again the shit I ignore is usually serious

>>266085

The dust blows forward and dust blows back.

One day you will have your garden by the sea.

>>266084

Too much? You'll never win The Nurlge2019 with that attitude.

>>266089

The harsh salt-laden winds will be difficult for the plants but I will find a sheltered spot for the vegetable patch, fruit orchard and strawberry fields.

>>266090

Forever stricken by half heartedness, eternally damned to be a mere foreman

>>266092

The day will come when you will find you have become more muffin than stud.

>>266087

I thought it was a few young cunts like me, with most of our board being 28 years old and then there being Weber who is 38

>>266091

You may need to look in to olives. Become the olive oil magnate.

This is it. I'm going to wipe off the sweet messages the ex had written on the fridge. I can't stop torturing myself like this.

>>266093

I need to resist the lemon meringue ice cream urges.

>>266096

Read it to us.

>>266094

Weber is not the oldest.

We have done away with the other children.

>>266094

We used to be 24 year old…

>>266099

I'm 86, was trying to find abo porn on that Google and found this place

>>266092

Only those that give it their all will succeed in supremacy.

>>266093

Wise words.

>>266094

>tfw still mid twenties

>>266096

Good, good.

Turns out sharpie doesn't come off fridges so easily.

Any tips?

>>266104

Cum and tears.

>>266103

Get some solar panels, bigger water tank, easy living.

I feel like the land would be worth more then 20k honestly.

My posts were stolen

I often find myself looking at cheap rural properties too, dreaming of a simple NEET life

>>266106

Especially if you found opal.

This is a good one too.

$80k for four bedrooms.

https://www.realestate.com.au/property-house-qld-yelarbon-106290865

>>266108

I'll probably still be doing it in 10 years time.

>>266103

That's a house?

The garlic breads didn't taste good. They are usually better. Someone should have stopped me.

>>266111

It's a dugout.

This is a nice one, huge land and great shed. House itself needs a lot of work though.

https://www.realestate.com.au/property-house-sa-edithburgh-109535091

>>266112

The plush possum looked at you with shame

>>266113

Good fishing at edithburgh

>>266115

I will try to live up to its expectations for me in future. It may be just what I need to keep me on the straight and narrow.

Unironically considering this

https://www.realestate.com.au/sold/property-house-sa-andamooka-127133118?cid=pdp:recent-sales

250mg of seroquel down the hatch

>>266113

Looks great. As long as it has power and water you'd be alright. Like warehouse living but a bit comfier.

Neet house when, we could make it like fightclub

>>266116

Not too far from Adelaide either. I went there not too long ago.

https://www.realestate.com.au/sold/property-house-sa-andamooka-127396882

This town is like max mad

>>266119

This is the best idea. It's just a shed with a toilet, an aircon and a kitchen

https://www.realestate.com.au/property-house-qld-ilfracombe-111920963

Happy house hunting NEETies, I'm going to crash.

You should too monk, get to work early in the morning.

Good night friends.

>>266122

That sort of living would really suit me. I would like more land though. No neighbours in sight is my goal.

>>266123

Good night my lemon meringue friend.

>>266123

I've only been awake for like 11 hours.

I might just have a 4-5 hour sleep tonight and then crash early tomorrow night, and start waking up early again.

I'll probably work over the weekend.

>thought this was only $4000 but then learned its to move

https://www.realestate.com.au/property-house-qld-rockhampton+city-131064782

Fucking Scam, I've seen people buy much better for cheaper unna

>>266109

That's a comfy looking house.

>waterfront

>big old veranda out the front

>Luscious garden

>toilet & shower

>Electricity (I assume)

I could see myself on a rocking chair out the front.

one day..

We should buy a cheap farmhouse somewhere all together, and live on the land

I'd chip in 2 grand for the deposit :^)

>>266132

That is a good Pepe. I do not like the thought of eating raw Chicken Periods though.

>>266130

Yorks would be a nice place to move to. The land will most likely continue to rise until sea levels engulf the land there

My friends have a shack near Minlaton, it's severely comfy and the land has gone up a lot.

>>266133

Thank you, shopped it myself.

I find it easier to eat more èggs if I consume them raw, a lot less cleaning involved also.

The yolk is much sweeter raw, took a few days to become use to the change but it's honestly great.

>>266135

boil them you boong

https://www.realestate.com.au/property-other-wa-southern+cross-130076702

NEET gym

>>266136

Boong-gang

Boong-lyfe

>>266137

Could convert it into the commune

Hang on, I can improve it.

Scrambled eg​gs.

>>266036

Nice fix.

>>266061

Hail.

250mg of jewoquel and a bottle of wine

Still not tired

>>266146

>250mg of the sedative jew

>>266130

Dumpster is way cheaper, plent of "sex" too

>>266147

ur a jew

>>266010

It's good you remembered Craig.

>>266101

Good man.

>>266143

Much better.

>>266128

Yeah, I;m not sure if that water is a lake or a river.

>>266133

>The land will most likely continue to rise

>sea levels engulf the land

>the land has gone up a lot.

Hmm

>>266052

Be careful if you're running a weber charcoal barbecue in the shed. Place it near the broken window or door so it ventilates outside.

>>266060

>I wish it was properly sealed up then it really would be great.

There's not much you can do with those old sheds. Mine is similar. Everybody's advice seems to be pull it down and get Stratco or somebody to put up a modern one.

>>266099

>Weber is not the oldest.

True, there's at least one pushing 50 and one the other side of 50 from memory.

>>266104

Acetone or paint thinner will get it off, but may fuck your fridge finish. Next time get a fridge whiteboard you dildo.

>>266154

Good morning.

I got to work extra early to do some IT work a pajeet was scheduled to do today. I don't trust the retarded brown cunt.

>>266154

Good morning my friend. Cool vest.

garlic bread hangover

How could you let me do this to myself?

>>266160

Morning.

>>266161

Morning. Plush possum looks at you in disgust.

>>266156

The broken window Will create good airflow with the open door. I could forge steel in there.

>>266157

They all think we are made of money.

I am leaving to go shopping. Going to change up my diet a bit. See you later alligators.

>>266160

What time did you start? Do you get much notice?

>>266166

I started at 6:15. There was no notice involved, I just woke up this morning and thought to myself 'fuck that curry bega' and drove to work.

>>266168

lel

Tracing back patch panels and tidying it up is actually an okay job if you're left in solitude and don't have to worry about interrupting service to things.

It would suit autism neets, especially if you colour code the cables by type or role.

Did no one notice NK in the gym photoshop of mine? Hmmmmm..

Good morning friends, on a tight time schedule this morning, no time for (You)s

See you all in the arvo.

>>266170

>NK in the gym photo

Shit, nah I didn't.

>>266163

>>266162

>>266161

>>266160

>>266154

Good morning

>>266172

3/5

You are my new Karen.

Good morning.

>>266173

>You are my new Karen.

Did you just call him a filthy whore ?

G'morning all

>>266174

Just commending him on his ability to please.

Good morning.

Brutal wank

Big boong shit

>>266177

Morning.

Off to the wage.

Have a good one.

>>266179

*only NEETs whose wanking budgets are in positive may have a good one

Wank burden

>>266181

the white neets burden

Wanked poo

>>266184

haha

>>266184

kek

sperged out in an email at work

>I’ve had zero training in any of this shit.

>We have no manuals.

>The [redacted] website is next to useless.

>

>Every other day something breaks around here and I am fucking sick of it.

>>266187

The website is useless because it's redacted

15 degrees today in Shitbourne, had a Chiko roll at smoko today, it was pretty fucking nice, reminded me of when I used to get them from the fish and chip shop on the way home from school.

I have the pea and ham soup on the boil. I also am doing a pork curry in the slow cooker. I cut up one of those six fifty a kilo boneless pork shoulders. It looked pretty tough. I have set the timer for six hours.

Up on the wards today, have no idea what I'm doing

>>266192

should have spent less time wanking then ay?

>>266194

Only ONE packet?

Shame on you boy

>>266191

Where are the pictures for proof?

>>266188

Ur a redact

Wagie ibs feels

Redacted wanks

>>266200

That's one of The Council's rituals. You remember the one where we all sat in a circle and wore blindfolds.

100 minutes to go

>>266201

I thought that was a traditional aboriginal wank ceremony.

Decent day at the cage.

Despite my extended bender this weekend they've put me on full-time casual hours now for being a 'high achiever', standards must be pretty low.

Guess I've got a job now. Payday today too, just waiting for the money to come in so I can go buy some acetone to wash that bitch away from my fridge and my life. Drove home like a fuckwit with my music loud thinking about holding her head under water.

Reeee fuck this shit, 3 hours sleep but powered purely by rage. A great feeling.

I've eaten six hard boiled Chicken Periods so far today.

>>266204

>they've put me on full-time casual hours

Well I hope you stick with it and cut down on the boong benders

>>266206

I think I will. I can feel a transformation coming.

Meegor for late lunch. Haven't eaten yet today.

Wank suppression

Wank discharge

Post wage wank

Intensive Wank Unit

>>266209

Gonna steal your wanks tonight boy

Bloody taxman took 140 of my 880

Sperged out a few more times today at work.

Not going in tomorrow.

FUCK THEM ALL

>>266214

About time you started being a lifter and not a leaner. And I don't mean shirt lifting, which you already do.

>>266216

Got no idea what you mean

>>266217

i think he called you a dole bludging fagg0t

>>266219

stop posting unspoilered poo pictures

>>266219

Needs more pepper.

>>266219

contains ground-up Cruisey :-(

wank origami

>>266196

Better quality more fibre but lower quantity

>>266214

If you're under the tax threshold when it comes time for the new financial year, you can get it all back.

>>266225

I suspect that was just one week's pay and he'll be well over the threshold IF HE DOESN'T GET FIRED LIKE ALWAYS

>>266219

If you share with the screws they would be delighted and might even give you a bit of extra light time at night.

>>266226

fuck you dan you stupid paddy mcfuck potato nigger

>>266227

>he'll be well over the threshold

I don't think so, but it's going to be a bitch calculating his tax from all those jobs though…

>>266230

oh you mean until this EOFYS? yeah you're rifht

>>266232

probably paying for one of his wank stain great-grandchildren to attend some $10,000 a term catholic dog schools

>>266228

Possum cut Chopper's ears off.

>>266234

He did so he could get into a closer facility for the recent NEET up.

>>266225

I think I will be, hopefully I get at least 3k back. Think I got 2.5 last year.

I do my returns via mygov so its all easy.

>IF HE DOESN'T GET FIRED LIKE ALWAYS

Already thinking about next weeks sickie (or two) i really need to see a doctor

>>266233

A never end wank cycle…

Desperately waiting for my pay to come through so I can buy some fuel and durries and chocolate bavarain

>>266239

I defied you last night and went to the dodgy Arab cunt that is open late.

He sold me a bottle of bowlers run for $10, dog cunt.

Had me in an unexpectedly bad coma for the start of work. Your oatties never let me down like that.

>>266241

You were a keeper.

>tfw having a hard think about the state of proctology in rural and remote indigenous communities

Any gay neets here? Im tired of being a virgin, just wanna cum in a hole tbh😫

Is there a site where you can upload your resume for jobs within a certain area and employers can contact you? Job searching is killing me, there's nothing in my town I'm capable of doing.

Had a vacuum, did the dishes.

Feeling good and refreshed. Desperately hangin out for those wagiebux to come through though.

Think it happens at around 8.

>>266247

Depends on your bank. Mine the money appears sometime after midnight.

>>266246

Time to apply for the DSP for thinking too hard.

>>266246

Move some where new.

>>266246

do a rape

>>266251

Need money for that.

>>266252

>>266253

>>266253

No you dont

>>266256

u can pretend it's hogwards

>>266204

Good job, don't get drugs this pay.

>>266255

I don't need money to move town?

>>266258

He should livestream himself doing nangs this week.

>>266260

>>266215

Were you there for that full 10 hours?

>>266259

Indeed, you can manage quite easily if you are smart enough.

>>266218

And a pretty little blouse.

>>266262

I was there from 6:15 until about 3:45

half the cunts didn't show up today and i ended up having to do a bunch of

ABSOLUTE FUCKING BULLSHIT

for much longer than i wanted

>>266219

Looks very appetising.

>>266265

What a mob of cunts.

>>266241

She;s calling you a white dog.

>>266242

>were

oh.

>>266245

There are but they're not sluts. Unless you're in The Council.

>>266269

Where do you think he got the pork "shoulder" from?

>>266263

How and without being homeless?

>>266274

Find a squat.

>>266275

That's homeless

>>266276

A squats a house though

>>266275

>>266277

Possum's shed is the home of squats.

Squats get the thots.

Wanklords own the majority of NEET wanks

NEET wank slums

>>266278

Squats are art hoe centeral

Might go to the gym

wankium den

>>266282

Get some creepshots while there bruz

>>266273

<Likely

finally found a curry shop with an actually hot vindaloo

and the naan breads are like 16" diameter

>>266287

Hot poos

>>266287

Sounds good, gori

>>266288

I have never experienced this phenomenon for some reason.

>>266289

gora is singular or masculine i think

gori is plural or girls specifically

>>266286

are you doing an evening shift?

>>266290

I know darling

>>266292

u scoundrel

>>266293

post elbow

>>266291

12pm - 8pm

Streamlined wank harvesting

>>266295

There is no shame in getting one of the security guards to escort you to your car at 8pm.

>>266297

Strong smelling man pajeet walking you to your car.

>>266296

What a world we live in.

Wank of Thrones

>>266300

Lord of the Wanks

>>266301

Star Wanks

>>266302

Harry Wanker and the Philsopher's Wank

>>266303

Full wank

Jesus Wank and the Latter Day Wanks

Wanks and the Furious

>>266297

I walk home

>>266307

To wank at home?

>>266307

Indianna Wank and the Temple of Wank

SHIRE WHERE IS SHIRE I NEED SHIRE

>>266310

Yes?

>>266311

You're not Shire

>>266312

Yes I am

>>266313

You don't have flag set

>>266314

Is this better?

>>266315

Yes.

The curvy bit on the top of my jack stands looks too deep for the depth of the hard points on my car.

Does this mean I have to put them under the axles instead?

>>266316

It should be fine, DO NOT PUT THEM UNDER THE AXLES

>>266317

What happens if you put them on the axles? They hold the car up the rest of the time?

>>266318

You could damage the axles, just put them under the hardpoints, it will be fine.

>>266319

If you say so.

The curve of the stands is about 12mm / 1/2" deep.

The hard points only look to be about 8mm.

Anyway, whatevs. Worst that happens is the under-door body gets all fucked up. At that point I'll just dump it and set fire to it and get money.

>>266256

>Dick Strawbridge

What a name

>>266241

She's sneakily making you think of her right before mummybots day

>>266320

>At that point I'll just dump it and set fire to it and get money.

lmao, it shouldn't be an issue, they don't need to be the right depth, that part of the body is supposed to take stress and stuff.

I carry a wank whistle with me for safety when walking home, that usually deters any would-be wank thieves

>>266322

Yeah, but that strip of hard point is like 3mm 1/8" thick. The width of the jackstand head is like 10cm / 3 3/4". So if the hard point isn't deep enough, the car body is going to rest of the stand.

Also the reason I didn't do it last weekend, apart from this problem, is that fuckin holden used a 15mm bolt head for the muffler. All my metric socket sets have a 14 and a 16 socket. Even the closest imperial (5/8) was 15.88 and too sloppy. Had to buy a socket from the shop.

>>266323

whistlecock neet

>>266323

>usually

Not tonight.

>>266323

Wank whistle isn't going to stop me from stealing your wanks.

If you walk around the streets at night flaunting your wanks, you can expect to be robbed

>>266328

You just want to meet NK, you floozy.

>>266324

Just put the stands closest to the hardpoints away from the body, have the overlap go inward underneath the car.

>>266330

I also realised, after spending ~$600 last weekend on jacks, that I have my old man's ramps. I probably could have reversed it up the ramps.

>>266331

I was gonna say, ramps would also be good.

Some very wankable ethnic chicks at the wank improving place

Pay came in.

Time to shop.

>>266332

I don't have any friends, so nobody to spot.

I'm also that retard who'd probably manage to drive off the side of the ramps despite starting with them against the rear tyres and having to travel all of two feet.

>>266333

My pay went in today as well

>>266333

Chicks don't have wank gearsticks though

>>266335

Buy some proper food staples this week.

>>266338

hmm

>>266331

>after spending ~$600 last weekend on jacks

…and a hoist can be had for less than $2k: https://www.gumtree.com.au/s-ad/forrestdale/other-parts-accessories/car-hoist-4t-2-post-single-phase-floor-plate-hoist/1166306943

>>266334

Ah should be fine, same with the jack stands, just take your time, line everything up, should be all good.

>>266338

Holy fuck.

Ended up working today for 8 hours

>>266342

You sneaky bastard

>>266270

underUNNA'd post

[pp [pp

>>266347

poo poo*

possum stole my baby

*my baby dingo

possum found a way into my roof space and pooed and peed everywhere

did neurofen neet die overnight

>>266225

How does that shit work, I've ignored the tax return shit every year

>>266352

Nah I just got anal raped by an Abo

Possum stole my post UNNA

>>266323

big kek, have a (You)

>>266342

He's forever lurking in the shadows. Just waiting for non-consent.

>>266354

You must be running out of bikes.

Reassessment was a success, Thanks for the encouragement NEET, (You) know who you are.

>>266358

>>266358

>You) know who you are.

I am having an existential crisis.

>>266357

They Jammed the bikes in my bum

>>266359

(you)

ok NEETs leaving to get dindins

Having a tear and share

>>266360

Internal bicycles are very trendy in france right now

>>266359

Better late then never.

>>266362

Half a share with >>266363

The boong boys just dropped season 2.

Gonna grab a beer some humus and get comfy.

Hummus*

>>266367

The old white guy gets raped at 3:47

And again at 7:16

And again in the closing credits

>>266342

Those mowed lawns, surely an upper class street with no boongs on it

>>266369

Sounds like I'm in for some quality screenplay.

>>266342

South Eastern suburbs NEET

Next time you're at chaddy I'm comin to rape ya

good night neets

i'll post more tomorrow as i'm having the day off

if i die it's all shire's fault

>>266374

>I'm just gonna wank on the voting form

Please do

>>266374

I wish Dick Smith was spending like Clive is

Sustainable with actual funding would be the 3rd biggest party

>>266374

literally none of those things matter for me tbh

I'm too poor to pay taxes and I don't care if Australia is militarily invaded

>>266379

There is no need for a military invasion they are already taking over

https://www.zerohedge.com/news/2019-05-07/chinas-big-brother-social-control-arrives-australia

>>266380

The jews will save us from the chinks

Or is it the otherway round, I forget

Didn't go to the gym today, nor am I meeting my wank quota, it's been a lazy day. Night Night NEETs.

>>266381

Nazboong will save us

>>266378

Looks like it. I'd reply in more detail but webms stopped loading for me today for some strange reason. No idea what's caused this nor how to fix it.

>>266380

If that starts happening in SA I'd ditching my smart phone and going back to my decade old Nokia.

>>266383

>Day of the spear when?