/ausneets/ - Aus NEETs

I warned them 30 posts ago, mate.

>>166418

Thank you for trying.

>>166417

Well bantered.

>>166421

Don’t encourage the Portuguese midget.

>>166422

I see you are beach body ready. Good work.

>>166424

What does a fatrollpussy feel like?

>>166416

>Couldn't you lazy NEETs do this?

No.

>>166427

Hope you get some good creep shots

>>166429

I suspect it was a rhetorical question.

>>166430

Fucking phone. Meant the prior post.

>>166392

White Ladies accept anyone. They have holes to fit any size.

>>166430

>>166431

Your (You) was not misguided though. I felt that it needed an answer.

>>166433

He'll get all that hot and sweaty action from the environmental chicks. Who are pushing him towards the water with all body on body contact.

Cheeky magpies aren’t eating the mealworms I bought them, just the mince meat.

>>166417

I bet the biddie in the middle was. I've seen that look and I know what it means.

Have to go to car shops and pretend to be a man.

>>166440

>car shops

Tell us more.

>>166441

Supercheap and auto barn and those places.

$40 at coles

Got some scales at kmart for only $9 too

4 days without a dart

>>166443

How many twiggy sticks did you get?

I only just got up when you left so I didn't ask for any but can I have some of the ones you got for NEEto?

>>166444

I like to ask for them but I know that I will binge on too many and upset my stomach/poo.

Fuck NEETs.

Smoked a dart at my mum's place

Fuck there is some loud as fuck thumping noise out of my window and it won't fucking stop

Made mummybot cry. Apparently retarded boong is an insult.

On the upside I visited one of Craig’s fucktard mates and am now drinking beer

Sounds like a wild morning for all neets

I miss gooning before noon

Cheeky magpie walked through the door and did a poo on the floor

>>166454

Magpies are almost as cheeky as seagulls sometimes

>>166455

Yes very. We’d only just arrived at the house this morning when they appeared en mass with their new baby’s.

The matriarch of the family is called Crookie (because she has a munted leg) and she was visiting us when we bought the house 20 years ago. She’ll probably die soon.

>>166456

Step on her neck.

Over here the wild parrots cuss at you, don't let cheeky birds get their way.

>>166453

Can you post us some good Brazillian/Portuguese insults/slurs and their translations/meanins

>>166457

Magpies are good cunts, mate. You don’t fuck with them.

>>166459

Magpies are NOT good cunts

>>166460

Go to your room and don’t come out until you are told you can.

>>166461

I am in your room, also mum you can't tell me what to do I live by myself hundreds of Kilometers from you

>>166460

They are nice birds when they live in areas where shitcunts don't mess with them

>>166463

>tfw lived in area where shit cunts mess with them

>>166464

I used to know that feel and wrongly judged magpies for a long time because of it. I guess anyone would be a mean cunt if they had to deal with abo kids lobbing rocks at them all day

>>166462

How can you be in my room and hundreds of kilometres away at the same time?

>>166466

4th dimensional Joondalup Dumpster Rape Theory

Driving around Melbourne but absolutely busting for a piss and can't find a place with free toilets

>>166465

You have now made me wonder if Abos eat magpies and what they taste like

>>166468

It’s legal to urinate standing by the front left wheel of your vehicle in most states.

>>166468

Public toilets are becoming an increasing rarity of late. Most housing estates don't have a single place to piss if you don't live there, it's a real pain

>>166471

Councils don’t want the upkeep of public toilets. Police don’t want to deal with the creeps.

>>166472

Degenerates and jews truly do ruin everything

>>166468

This is why I drive around in space nappies.

>>166471

oh and also how there seems to be less playgrounds per capita by a fair margin now

>>166468

why don't you take a piss at a HJs

>>166475

Some councils are pretty good with that but you go to other places and there is literally nothing but a couple of small parks with grass and a handful of trees

>>166473

>Degenerates

Oh stop!

>>166478

I can’t understand how Alan Jones has a talkback radio show and people don’t remind him 500 times a show about the time he was arrested with his pants down in a public toilet in London.

>>166478

Okay, female defecation enthusiasts

>>166479

Aren't talkback callers screened before being allowed to go on air?

>>166480

And faggots and paedos

>>166481

Yes, but it can’t be that hard to get one past the keeper

>>166482

and trannies

>>166480

That was a beautiful story that was shared.

>>166484

You think that will stop John?

>>166485

It might, I mean while he knows it's a guy the fact that guy is pretending to be a girl might turn him off

>>166486

John will just find a dimly lit alleyway. Stopping him from using public rest rooms is not a deterrent.

>>166487

Those are becoming a rarity nowadays too

>>166488

it's ok, it's 2018 so he'll just do it in the open

>>166490

Brazillians are creative in making them selfs more annoying than the average person.

>>166490

>pastel de flango (asians have trouble pronouncing the portuguese R, and pronounce it like an L. Pastel is a brazillian dish in which a thin pastry container is filled with something and then deep fried, in this case chicken, which is frango. Asian immigrants have a tendency to make fastfood joints where they tend to make pastel. If a regular portuguese speaker says "pastel de frango", and pronounces the "r" in frango with an "L" instead, they mock the asian's inability to speak portuguese and associate them with their stereotype at once)

So basically "Me Ruv U Rong time"

>I'm only not your father because your mother didn't have change for 10

>shove your fingers up your ass and whistle

>If I ate an alphabet soup I'd shit out a smarter comment

These are very good

>gayúcho (a section of white southern brazillians and those of neighbouring countries around the area are said to be of gaúcho culture, a rural way of being that they pride themselves in, but in modern times they have been poisoned by liberal ideas, so they're mocked by having their name mixed with the word gay which only takes adding in one letter. Daddybot for instance is gaúcho, and when I mock him for it he gets red with anger)

This is better than Pozbournian

>>166492

Australians are the superior race

>>166496

indeed, Abos are superior being and masters of the 4th dimension, which is why NK is such an apt rapist

>>166494

>Pozbournian

There's beauty in simplicity when it comes to those nicknames. I recommend Mehbourne.

I think if you gave it an extra australian accent it would sound even better, but I haven't listened to enough australians to really get a feel of the overall australian accent or more regional ones.

>>166489

I wish I had such an enterprising mindset.

>>166499

we all can't be John and NK

cya neets

>>166501

Goodbye

>>166468

Go to any suburb where there are pajeets, you can shit and piss in the designated street

15 degrees today in Shitbourne, going to go see a mate in Gippsland today

>>166503

Found a nice clean toilet in a pajeet carwash near Glen Iris

>>166505

Have a wank

NK how did you manage the emu, goon, dexies and weed last night?

>>166508

>I tried looking at gore pics

We both know that wasn't going to stop anything

>>166508

Why look at gore pics when you can just look out your window

>>166511

Oh shit fuck I clicked hide coutnry instead of spoiler BO pls spoiler

>>166504

>Glen Iris

Pretty nice area, still relatively white last time I was there

>>166513

Who should victorian neets vote for in the upcoming state election, given that both major parties are committed to destroying the state through immigration?

>>166514

They should vote for relocation to a better state

>>166516

>camping?

*glamping

>>166505

Pain and sexual pleasure are fairly closely related. Just learn to think of it as part of the fun

Does RapeDad do this?

https://efukt.com/22595_Czech_Porn_Is_Still_Horrible.html

fark neets

Popped 90mg of codeine while I was driving around town

Had me grinning and melting in traffic with the music on

>>166514

Do we still have that many VIC NEETs? I thought this was a WA/SA and NSW board with the odd Melbourne, rural NSW and Brisbane NEET.

>>166520

>90mg of codeine

How many tablets?

>>166522

3

>>166523

Be careful m8 that's going to slow down your reaction time.

>>166520

NK?

>>166511

fuuuuuucken nice tbh

>>166527

They remind me of this

>tfw crook again for the 2nd time in a month

Becoming a wagie was a mistake

>>166530

I am far too exhausted to see you Dan, and I am pretty sure you don't do home visits on the weekend.

>>166533

It truly is an amazing time to be an alcohlic

i haven't started an assignment that is due tomorrow. this isn't going to end well NEETs

>>166535

How intense is the assignment?

>>166535

Get a grip mate.

That kind of behavior only causes you unnecessary stress

>>166534

That guy who paid the AirtaskerNEET, like $50 or so for the KFC combo meal to be delivered to his daughter the other day just shows how society is changing.

>>166537

>get a grip mate

not on your penis, though

>>166538

The executive market is just going to keep getting bigger (by all definitions of the word)

>>166536

its not that bad but i know that i will most likely only get a pass for it.

>>166540

I don't have a dog

>>166542

Just do the best you can in the time you have left. No point worrying about the past at this point in time

>>166543

a fucken white dog

>>166543

My apologies, I have reclassified the picture and stored it in the Other WA aboriginal folder.

Once again, can anyone tell me how to clear the inside of a windscreen

>>166548

It's just going to fog up again if that's the weather, but a wet towel does it.

If you're clothed and not dehydrated, you got the tools for it.

>>166549

I need to clean it. I've been wiping the fog with my hand for about a year and now its all fucked and hard to see through

Could goon be used to clear his windscreen?

>>166548

Winded you dog

The AC doesn't work in the astra but I can use the heater to defog the windscreen since the fan still works

>>166552

Install a fan to suck the hot air from the boot and push it to front AC system.

>>166554

Small dexie poo

>>166555

But I poo everyday now, very regular

>>166556

May be you need something like this:

https://ask.metafilter.com/64918/I-want-harder-poop

>>166561

May as well give up on the rest of the year, and try and get off the darts in 2019.

>>166563

Screw that

This pack cost me $30

>>166566

So true mate.

>>166566

Craig is always looking below and behind you.

>>166507

NK could you please answer this weekly question.

>>166455

Yeah but when they do stuff like that it is usually unexpected, you expect seagulls to be shitcunts.

>>166507

Was fine, had a cone to put me to sleep around 1am or else I'd be up the whole night

>>166470

I never knew that.

>>166493

I already posted that. Please read the posts you miss.

NK do you have a pipe or what? I cant reember how you smoke your pot

>>166571

Thank you, I needed that.

>>166511

Intriguing.

>>166512

I'm going to fucking ban you hue.

>>166574

He smoked 70/30 mix though an emu can and crushed dexies on top

>>166520

Fuck.

I need to go back to the doctor and get a script.

I miss them.

>>166574

I use a pipe

>>166521

A bunch of Gippslandians rocked up just before /aus/ died. They were the /pol/lack types. Then when monk exposed himself a bunch of other Melbournites thought that they didn't need to hide it anymore.

>>166547

>>166574

I smoke so rarely that I make a pipe out of a beer can when the opportunity arises.

>>166580

All victoria neets go faggot sooner or later

I have a very productive day. I went to see my nan, then went for a drive with my dad and got a flasher unit for my car. While I was out I told him that my oven shit itself so we went and looked in a couple shops and the cheapest one was $620 plus then $320 for delivery and installation so I looked on gumtree and called a few people. Went around to one guys who had a relatively new one and bought it for $150 and then brought it home. I had to clean out behind my stove as it hasn't moved in probably decades. Scrubbed the walls and shit. Then installed the oven, dad helped me because I've never done that before, apparently gas fittings are backwards, you turn them left to tighten. I put a load of washing on before I left because I was only going to get the flasher unit so I've got that back on.

Think I'll go get some coke and have a drink or 20 tonight.

The oven was a big thing on my checklist of things I need to do. The next one is to get someone in to put new plastic under my garden bed because it's old and weeds have ripped it to shreds.

>>166584

>gas fittings are backwards, you turn them left to tighten.

To stop people from installing shit themselves was the grand plan I was told.

>>166585

Rather to stop people from accidentally connecting gas to something that isn't meant to be connected to gas.

>>166586

>accidentally connecting gas to something that isn't meant to be connected to gas.

Such as?

>>166587

The garden hose

>>166587

oxygen

>doing a 12 hour security shift last night, guarding a small event ground + equipment which was to be used the next day

>we'd organized $20 an hour for a total of $240 and I'm feeling moderately okay with this

>the site was in the middle of nowhere so I brought doggo and patrolled the area every half hour

>the organizer shows up in the morning with a group of people he'd contracted on AirTasker to set up the event

>doggo's become too territorial of the area overnight and chases + tries to bite him when he comes near the car

>lol

>he passes me some folded up fifty dollar notes, I stuff them into my pocket and shake his hand before leaving

>go home and sleep

>wake up and check my pockets

>the folded up fifties come to $400

>he's not responding to my texts

Did I dogtimidate him into paying double?

>>166593

Good work deserves a good payment

This is going to be an intense storm. Wish me luck NEETs.

>>166593

Fuck him, keep the money

>>166595

>IKTFS

>>166586

As we were doing it my dad was telling me of a place we used to live in that all the gas fittings were actually just the same ones you'd use for the plumbing.

That bloody codeine has struck my afternoon right in the balls.

Managed to cook this weeks lunches but my knees and bloody weak and I could probably have a nap now.

Oh well, I'll just have a cone

>>166593

what kind of texts did you send? I hope you weren't planing on giving back the extra.

>>166591

The pub is 8ch and /ausneets/ is the mates.

>>166598

Sounds like sloppy craftsmanship. Maybe you could've sued.

>>166593

Take doggo with you everywhere from now on. I hope you get him a nice bone for his hand in this.

>>166602

He bought it off a friend.

>>166597

>IKTFS

>S

>?

>>166605

>>S

I live in the Shire to, so it is either him or the other NEET out West.

>>166606

Way out west is where the rain don't fall.

All electrical devices have been unplugged.

>>166607

At the moment it's pretty loud the lightening. Unlike this intelligent NEET >>166608 I am still wanking and will not be unplugging my devices.

Fuck this storm is intense

The big 66666 approaches

Who will be the demonic NEET?

Only time will tell

>>166609

When I bought my new laptops I got two surge protector things. They were $60 or $70 each.

You should get one for your wanking devices.

>>166611

Zeus the god of thunder.

>>166610

I'm a bit jealous, here in God's country it is sunny and blue skies with a very light breeze.

Powers gone out.

>>166615

Still got power in gymea, the shire.

>>166616

In Sylvania.

>>166615

I love it when that happens at night,I have 2 UPS one for my pc and another for lights, so I go outside and look out into the neighbourhood and everything is in darkness except for my place

>>166617

So the power is out in Sylvania?

>>166619

Yep.

>>166612

>You should get one for your wanking devices.

The wank has concluded as the rain continues to die down…

>>166622

Not very comfy tbh, it's hot and muggy.

think im gonna munt

>>166623

>>166625

heh, I forgot that the seasons are swapped

>>166623

put on the AC

You qualified NEETs ever consider working a FIFO job? Quite a few IT positions listed in this one quick search I've done

>>166596

>>166594

As an honestneet I will keep it if he doesn't reply tonight. I already have my eye on a nice massage place down the road where I can now afford to splurge $80. I haven't had prolonged physical contact in a few years so this will be very nice.

>>166600

I couldn't just rip him off, he was a nice guy running an event for parents and children. There was some tragic backstory I'm sure but it never seemed the right moment to ask.

>>166603

The reward was swift and generous, do not worry. Pig trotters were on the menu earlier and I just served a nice dish of tuna on rice.

>>166630

>nice massage place

A rub and tug joint?

>>166632

Take this opportunity to organise your belongings and files.

That storm was like was like my wank sessions short and intense.

Seriously think I'm about to vomit NEETs.

Not even drunk, will be the first time since I got food poisoning years ago.

>>166630

I am glad doggo got rewarded

Whopper #2

>>166637

bigboi

>>166634

homeless manlet wank sessions, short and in tents

>>166638

2 Small Whopper meals for $10.95

It is a clear winner on the cost/satisfaction ratio

Think I might go to the casino tonight. Haven't been anywhere in months.

Had chicken tindaloo, rice, and some fried bread thing for dinner. I ordered naan, but they came back and said they were out and asked if some [gobbledygook] was ok.

There was some and doing a sound check while I was waiting for my takeaway and it was very annoying.

>>166642

How much are you blowing?

>>166645

Just a 50 I guess

>>166646

If you’re sensible you can spin out $50 a fair way with a little bet here or there. Watch what some of the high rolling chunks are doing and back bet on them.

I will order a pizza later. Should I eat the whole thing or just half and have the rest for tomorrow?

>>166647

>Watch what some of the high rolling chunks are doing and back bet on them.

Those people go to the ATM get hundreds out and watch it disappear before repeating the cycle.

>>166647

Is there anything I can play in the suburbs that isnt pokies or poker?

Crown is quite a hike

>>166644

You should get some vego curries. I had one that started with an 'a' it had cauliflower and wasn't very hot but very nice.

I find the meat ones are always a disappointment because they use shit meat.

>>166650

Nothing legal I know of.

>>166652

You say that like you know of something illegal.

You know nothing.

>>166650

>Crown is quite a hike

If you drive there with the cost of petrol and parking you might be able to squeeze a drink in with the $50

Oh my.

>>166653

Chinks have gambling dens in every city

>>166656

Yeah but do you know of one that he can go to?

>>166655

Would that amount of sugar be palatable?

>>166584

I've got a bunch of shit to do too, small steps is what counts.

I'm the NEET that woke up past midday today so apart from this evening I guess today is a bit of a write off, drats.

>>166658

Yes.

>>166660

It is a dessert.

>>166648

I usually eat the entire thing, unless I make garlic bread to go with it, then I save a few slices for a late Breakfast the next day

>>166657

I don’t even know where he is

>>166657

Good question, he could save his cash and bet with parts of his body.

.

bum rash

Fuck you Dan

>>166666

ayyy

>>166668

>Nobody beats Dan Murphy's

>>166666

Well played Dan

>>166591

I never went to the pub or clubbing or anything like that, I just miss having my other awkward kids sitting under a tree at school being bored but enjoying the warm crisp lunch time relief of no teachers talking about video games and stacies, the fun we had playing in group chat on games was awesome too even if none of us really liked each other much and just put up with each other because we had no one else.

>>166650

They usually have bingo in the local RSl clubs on a Thursday

>>166629

I posted a few days ago the only jobs I reckon I could put up with would be either FIFO or government bludge jobs, unfortunately both are quite hard to come by unless you're a tradie for the former, or a woman for both/either.

>>166672

>I never went to the pub or clubbing or anything like that

>IKTF

NK it's time for a downgrade

https://landley.net/aboriginal/

>>166672

I spent a lot of time in pubs. It was wasted time and money.

>>166677

Based and redpilled.

Might just go to Dans actually, 20 days is good enough

>>166676

We don't use computers dog

Might Veet my nuts tomorrow.

>power still out

I guess they really did mean it would be back on by 8pm, still have 3 hours battery left on the laptop though.

#1 for a day well done.

comfy unemployed hailstorm

>>166688

Nothing wrong with that.

>>166688

well if they need help doing the testing I suppose I could help them out, it would give me something to do during the day

>>166684

Why not today?

#2 &3 aren't going down very well. I don't think I will have any more.

>>166688

Baik, siapa gak suka polis wanita chantik?

Bodoh amat wkwkwk

>>166693

Can you talk more about sex adventures?

>>166694

dont be a sex pest

>>166695

What if I can't help myself?

Might watch the 3rd film the The Librarian franchise and then go to bed.

Finally its getting dark and the pressure of being productive during the day is going away, I can relax

>>166698

Have a wank

any NEETs going to give this a go?

>>166701

Did you have that wank?

>>166702

Not yet.

I finally put all my porn on another disk. Maybe later on.

>>166703

What's the plan moving forward?

>>166701

Same, what are your short term, medium term and long term plans? Why has it all gone PEAR SHAPED?

>>166705

Sobriety Sydrome is pretty devastating.

>>166698

If you just slept all day and didn't get up until 5 you wouldn't have this problem. Advanced neets know this already

>>166701

Yeah, well you were born black - things can only get better from here.

>>166704

>>166705

These plans will be penciled up tonight.

This has happened here:

https://www.safetynetrecovery.com/suffering-pink-cloud-syndrome/

>>166708

Are you going to start by having 1 (one) drink to get relaxed before all that hard work?

>>166695

Pretty disappointed I didn't get any advice

3 drinks and I want to sleep. I have changed

>>166712

Have another one

>>166713

Nah, I ate some chips and drank some coke.

>>166714

Did you have a wank?

>>166716

Thank you for providing the follow up.

>>166717

Well, did you?

Hi NEETs,

Have recently completed that wank that was suggested earlier. As expected, results were positive, my mood has improved and I feel more grounded.

Thanks for the advice, I'm sure this will continue to be of use in the future.

Regards,

Me

>>166720

Somewhat did a few things but the anxiety goes on. Best to ignore it until another day.

>>166720

I provided everybody a timetable last night that would have yielded a full pantry, reliable motor vehicle, and a sparkling clean penis.

>>166720

Not really, I have been ridiculously lazy and feel like shit. That pic is literally all I've done the entire day (Watching shit on YouTube and eating too).

I plan on having an early one tonight and smashing everything out tomorrow morning when the sun is up.

>>166722

I followed it somewhat. I woke up at a 6 and did the groceries before 8.

Also cleaned the inside of my car.

>>166720

I wanted to binge eat chocolate, but was too lazy to go out to the shops to get some.

>>166721

Yeah I was the same, there is a takeaway shop that I can sometimes go into, so I thought I would get some hot chips or something for lunch , but I became too afraid to stop and go in, another failure

>>166720

I will start working on my presentation any minute now

I just make a list in my head really, the hardest thing is the first.

>>166728

I use post it notes to write points then rip them up when done.

>>166732

nighty nighty Robin

Is there a good site to buy nendoROIDS from?

>>166728

Im partial to standard A4 notepads and clipboards, oh and a hb pencil, much nicer than pens.

>>166734

I get mine from Ami Ami, they are cheapest there but low in availability. I buy things from Solaris too, they are more expensive, have less variety on stock but more availability in what they do list.

>>166720

Ate fud, found a sweet pepe sticker i can give to a fren

>>166728

I use my memory and then get angry when it fails

>>166720

I purchased some new socks and (soon to be) cumdies

>>166688

Why do Indonesians have such shit taste in hair?

>>166741

Gook night

>>166740

Primitive savages. Nuking them, just like japan, would be best. Just imagine what it would be like if we had the second japan just next door.

>>166741

Gook night

>>166743

>japan but with muslims

Sounds like exactly the kind of thing I want to be nowhere near

>>166745

Obviously i mean nuking them until the cancer is gone

>>166743

They lack any kind of culture to form a base from.

>>166746

Do you really want to deal with the radioactive abos from the tip of the NT?

Aboriginal poo

>>166748

It could not make them any worse.

>>166747

We can get the Japs to subjugate them, surely another island is attractive to them.

>>166748

Are boongs not already radioactive? They may as well be for the distance i keep from them

First glass

Second glass

>>166751

Well, the emperor does have the mandate of Amateresu to rule over the entire world.

>>166752

like the first /sip/ at church

What are you listening to atm neets

>>166757

chopped cows

>>166760

cows that are being chopped

>>166757

youtube.com/watch?v=LJfJPxLntZU

>>166763

this music is too fast paced

>>166763

Where did you buy your nendoroids?

I really want to have sex, I miss it so much.

>>166765

Ami Ami.

>>166764

I don't think it is that fast paced.

>>166757

>>166767

That's a Jap site? Is postage expensive?

>>166762

comfy song NEET

Can you fuck a nendoroid

>>166769

You kind of have to use sites based in Japan, otherwise you are paying extraordinary prices for a minimal variety(Zing being an example of this). It's about 20 Aud for postage but they will combine orders.

>>166771

Hot glue

>>166772

Thanks mate.

>>166770

I like the war songs my grandma used to sing, they are soothing.

still blast this during neetparties from time to time, lyrics are gold

>>166774

Your grandma was a war criminal

I have missed the act of smoking. Its nice to play with the cigarette in my fingers again.

Smoking cocks and knitting socks

>>166778

with grandmas singing

>>166776

as long as she was turning shitskins into ash and memory, i am happy :)

Wish my grandma wasnt such a whore feels bad

>>166775

The laughing makes this so hilarious