/ausneets/ - Aus NEETs

Should be Anal Prolapse Edition tbqh

well inflated tyres

>>160376

Who did that happen to?

>>160379

Happens daily to those who see a flash of blue before waking up in dark boot of the Astra.

>>160378

NEET General #213 - Weber Sucks and Check Your Tyre Pressure Edition

我吃了你所有的狗

中國的陰莖非常大

>>160390

>我吃了你所有的狗

>

>中國的陰莖非常大

I ate all your dogs.

Chinese penis is very large

>>160390

>>160391

>>160392

HE TOOK OUR DOGS !!!

>>160395

Very stylish.

Close that knife.

>>160397

That's my other girl.

Trivago Girl is my main squeeze.

>>160397

The ad and the post in the pic make a bannerable image

The honey whiskey was excellent, had a glass this morning and another tonight. I actually mixed it with some lemon tea by a 1/4 mixture of whiskey to tea. It tasted extraordinarily delicious. Had a smoke and decided to expand my taste in shows, so since I have my own liking to space as a personal flavor I chose Star Trek since so many people seem to enjoy it. I've been watching season 1 of Enterprise and it's not so bad. The episodes do get repetitive sometimes but I'll keep watching since I like the characters. I plan on retiring in a few hours for work but in the mean time I'll be looking for music to put on my phone to listen to on breaks. Anyone have suggestions?

>>160401

>Anyone have suggestions?

Have a wank

>>160402

Wank to Seven of Nine.

>>160403

or Neelix

>>160404

>Neetlix

>>160401

Never heard of bourbon and hot tea being mixed together, but it sounds like you're onto something.

>>160407

Hope you're feeling better now.

>>160352

The anger from fuel prices and being critiqued by a bunch of neets will make him drive even more erratically

I'll take an angry lesbian

With a loaded gun

>>160407

Do not take any more.

>>160395

>knife and watch lying on the desk

What did you do?

I'm kind of tempted to buy a weber (cooking appliance, not man)

Neets are fucking degenerates you need to get on your own two foots and get a job and your own place to live in.

How goes it NEETs.

>>160408

Thanks. I just need a solid sleep and I'll be fine. What's this about weber and threads?

>>160414

>on your own two foots

You been looking at my NEETstick ?

>>160412

Raped

>>160415

I could never take him from his lover

>>160417

Weber is terrible at thread creation.

He also created this thread and the previous one.

>>160420

He hasn't even met Trivago Girl.

>>160422

or Justine Schofield.

>>160421

This thread is a marked improvement over the last. If we let him keep going he'll be making big brained threads in no time at all

>>160422

I'd love to purchase one of those

>>160422

I heard he may have met NK once, briefly

>>160422

Trivago girl is a slut

>>160427

Ask your local dans wagie

>>160428

(reee-ing internally)

>>160428

We all would be if we looked like that

>>160427

Surely somebody here is sober enough to provide this service.

>>160426

We just high-fived in the craft beer aisle at Dan's and continued on our respective ways.

>>160433

A sober NEET is like an ice cube in the sun

>>160435

Surely some of us have made it through these 6 days

>>160435

More like glass under heavy weight

>>160436

Monk, ironically.

>>160434

If by craft beer aisle you mean dumpsters out back and by high fived you mean got raped then I believe you

>>160438

He didn't get the name for nothing, I hope he makes it this time

>>160441

So do I, brother. So do I.

>>160411

Heck no. I'm never doing that again. As a treat, I'll upload a photo of the pissbottle later today when I get out of bed.

>>160439

No, we respect each other as professionals in our fields.

>>160438

Still going strong. Feeling a bit arrogant today, in a fantastic mood and finding a reason to crack a coldie and celebrate my week of Soctober.

Think I would just feel guilty after that though tbh.

>>160407

Try masturbating

>>160444

>As a treat, I'll upload a photo of the pissbottle later today

Thank you, you will be reminded if you do not as you made a sacred promise to the Gen.

>>160448

>masturbating

*wanking

>>160446

I remember one neet of size posting running pics a few years ago. I also remember having such plans myself when i was a running neet, but they did not come to fruition

>>160448

Are you a real canadian? I thought they were myths.

>tfw never piss bottled

>>160447

Proud of you, mate.

Don't fuck it up now.

Only 3 weeks to go.

>>160451

I used to enjoy that NEET who went on NEET walks, it was very comfy.

>>160453

I'm too worried about just happening to have a massive volume of piss at that time and it overflowing while I can only watch on in shame.

>>160452

Yeah. Are you the local leaf around here?

>>160456

I used to post pics of my NEET walks but stopped because it was always the same thing.

>>160457

If you're ever tested, you're actually struggling to produce the required volume.

>>160456

It is always nice to hear little snippets of outside life from neets. There are only so many pictures of NKs room a man can take

>>160458

I'm a burger born and raised, I've taken refuge here but I fill the role of the shitposting leaf every now and then.

Why are we getting so many foriegners these days ?

Fucking multiculturalism, can't escape it

>>160459

I will still enjoy them if you did. Particularly, the >tfw depressed ones.

>>160461

>There are only so many pictures of NKs room a man can take

I will always take more though…

Have the number of posters in the NEET gen decreased since the split with the old place? Feels like we get far less NEET pics nowdays but maybe I'm just imagining the old days with nostalgia goggles.

>>160456

I used to post my river/swamp walk pics

Like the other NEET said, it gets a bit samey.

>>160463

/ausneets/ is a meltingpot of friendship and happiness.

>>160464

>I will still enjoy them if you did. Particularly, the >tfw depressed ones.

I don't go for NEETwalks anymore since I'm a wagie now.

>>160462

Taking refuge from what?

>>160465

The pace is as quick as I can recall it being. There was days long ago when 50 posts in a day felt like a busy time. NEET pics were always taken by a small handful of posters so I guess one or two of them leaving can make it feel like a big drop.

>>160466

They're appreciated nonetheless. I could happily live in a swamp log cabin, as long as I have my banjo, guns, and moonshine.

>>160465

I think this place gets more traffic then the old board, just NEET's don't post as many pics like before.

>>160468

RapeNEET

>>160470

Alrighty, I'll take some more next time I go out.

>>160469

I have barely been posting and use to be a frequent poster.

I am an ex name-NEET that has became a no name NEET as the years have passed.

I got a haircut this morning that was long overdue, felt good to actually do it and to stop putting it off.

>>160469

That weekend Cruisey turned into a drunken sot we burned through three threads in two days.

Cheesey always posted infrequently, but generated lots of replies.

Possum has been scarce of late, partly because of shitcunts like Weber.

>>160472

Now that he's a wagecuck a North American rendezvous is an eventual inevitability

>>160475

Monks return has sped things up however.

>>160473

Thank you. Don't feel obligated to do it every time, just whenever the fancy takes you.

>>160472

Kek

>>160480

rip

>>160474

>I got a haircut this morning that was long overdue, felt good to actually do it and to stop putting it off.

Good on you mysterious anonymous neet. I was going to do the same myself but decided to put it off until after school holidays

>>160480

And they said we'd be dead by now

>>160480

Australia doesn't even have 83 ISPs. More like 4 and a few re-sellers.

>>160475

I have not been browsing lately (Will be now just like regularly before) and noticed some drama between Weber and Possum? Did it involve cruisey too?

I only saw the thread with the Cheesy and Tahlia drama, is Cheesy back? I hope he is ok

Us NEETs need to bring each other up, this has been quite the year for us all

>>160480

It's like seeing your ex girlfriend tattooed and married to an ex convict

>>160474

What was your name, friend?

I shaved my head the other day, but am yet to shower, and need to scratch the cheese off my scalp to feel truly clean.

>>160485

I haven't seen Cheesy post since he broke up with Tahlia.

>>160485

Speaking as Weber:

There is no direct drama between Possum and me, only that he has cited some of my doings as upsetting in recent times.

Possum and Cruisey are still an item, although not without their own indivual issues, and yet to meet.

The big Cheese has not been sighted in weeks, other than a brief appearance on the Discord about 10 days ago.

#NEETNews

>>160489

Possum is rather easily upset tbh

>>160489

>doings

antics might have been a better word?

All this historical talk is making me want to purchase a woolies cheesecake

>>160491

He's a good man, just re-incarnated from a nicer, gentler era.

>>160493

And then make some mindies ?

>>160491

The shed possums wore down his patience

>>160494

He is a good lad indeed.

>>160495

You can't buy them OTC anymore can you? I don't generally keep up with degenerate druggie news but I remember that being a thing

Any of youse ever get on the poppy seed tea like I told yas to?

>>160498

No idea tbh, just remember that when I first started posting cheesecake,milk and mindies were the main conversations

>>160495

>>160493

Don't forget a metal detector, white power rack, inghams tendies or a basedNEET frozen curry meal.

>>160500

I too now remember the long milk discussions

>tfw now drink almond milk

>>160498

I remember that's first thing I saw being posted when I started lurking on the old gen a few years ago, I was in awe at the depravity.

>>160501

Ah, the good old days

When real men hunted deer with chainsaws

>>160500

I remember watching a NEET youtube video about separating codine from paracetamol in water, using a coffee filter.

Seriously reckon I could get on the piss tonight mates

>>160505

Yeah that was NK

>>160501

>a metal detector

I'm still pretty upset fagneet only made one or two metal detecting videos. A NEET showing all the things he found around the place would make for great entertainment

>>160503

NEET King never does make it gentle

>>160504

I can't be the only one who enjoyed most of those vids. It was nice and comfy to have another NEET just casually speaking his thoughts on various topics while playing games

>>160506

Don't go overboard.

>>160509

We really do need another prolific video neet

>>160505

Haha, I remember those times dearly.

>>160513

kek

>>160509

uniNEET (whatever happened to him) was good, never got into vaporNEETs shit (no offense if you're browsing), basedNEETs, shireNEEts, cruiseNEET, NK and fagNEET were all great. Don't remember possum's much other than one about the shed possums being hilarious. The Cheesemeister's of course #1 always my fav.

>>160515

Who made the NEET Street vid ?

>>160516

I think it was NK.

>>160511

do you want to volunteer m8?

I wish gookNEET stuck around, imagine if we made vids of his degenerate fun, it would top even monk

>>160518

I was shocked to discover that gookNEET was in fact not a gook

>>160518

Is Monk the most degenerate NEET? He seems like a kind soul.

>tfw never named

Someday I'll get into some wacky shenanigan worthy of a name, and I'll die a happy man.

>>160520

monk's indian story was probably one of the most degen things I've read on the board, he is definitely up there with NK and gookNEET

fagNEET was more of a deviant degen than a full blown pleasure degen I'd say

then we have our pureNEETs (possum, cruisey, cheesy)

>>160518

I'm much too paranoid and boring to be a successful videoneet

>>160521

iktfn

>>160521

It isn't worth the heartache of becoming a no-name NEET as the years go by.

>>160522

>monk's indian story

The erotic fiction?

>>160525

>fiction

>>160525

poojeeta poojeeta

walking down the street-a

looks at you

does a poo

now it's on your feet-a

There was also that NEET who did a poo in the shower.

>>160527

kek

Someone post the erotic fiction story

>>160528

That was a troll image

>>160528

We're still trying to forget.

>>160528

>tfw have thought about shitting in the shower unironically

good my IQ is just high enough to know it's a bad idea

>>160533

NK?

>>160528

A mate of mine used to do glazing

He gave it up because they kept sending him to homeswest places and apparently all the homeswest boongs shit in the shower regularly

>>160533

Even if you manage to stomp it down, the fundamental problem is going to re-appear in a few days to a week.

>>160535

Trust the traditional land owners to understand the need to conserve water in a water sparse country

Fucking cold in shitney today.

>>160537

I blame globalabo warming

>>160538

>no temperature reading

Slackneet

>>160540

18c and windy as fuck

Absolute ripper of a day in Bestbourne, was driving around with a smile on my face earlier today.

>>160542

You are literally the only person I've ever met who likes melbourne

>>160543

He's probably Somalian

>>160544

>niggerneet

Very seriously considering a sack from Dans.

Can't really see why not tbh

>>160545

we are all niggers on the inside

>>160547

I am not, apart from my poopchute

>>160542

I am going out for a drive with the gf tomorrow.

>>160543

Been to Melbourne a few times, I didn't think it was so bad, but I didn't stay long enough to make a real judgement.

>>160546

Get a six pack instead so you don't overdo it

>>160546

Don't do it

>>160546

Dan likes it when you suck his sack

>>160550

Its not even 4 oclock

>>160549

Give her my regards, Shire.

I visit Melbourne two or three times a year. Never run into niggers, but have run into plenty of chink and some pretend buddhist monks once.

>>160553

1:43 pm real Australia time

>>160555

cheesey?

>>160556

Nope, sorry

I am going to reinstall Windows and never download a pepe image again.

>>160558

C'mon mate your thread isn't that bad

Yeah fuck it, I'm getting maggoted tonight

>>160561

>sober firstweekofoctober

Yeah fuck it, I'm shooting up heroin tonight

Yeah fuck it, I'm studying tonight

>>160564

Stay on your own board ex-BO

Yeah fuck it, booking Karen tonight

>>160559

I envy this pepe

>>160568

You could buy a bra and live your dream within the hour

>>160569

It wouldn't smell like a vagina owner

>>160570

Spray a bit of perfume and rub your nuts on it.

>>160570

If you ask your mummybot really nicely maybe it can

I can't believe Monk is drinking again.

>>160573

He needs to be sent to a place far removed from exotic beauties and alcohol

>>160573

I'm outside Craig's right now contemplating this decision

>>160575

Turn around and run

>>160575

son i am disappoint

>>160578

every series had to have a montard nigger, didn't it

>>160579

*mongtard

>>160578

He looks like one of those retarded wojaks

>>160583

good to hear.

I too am having strawberries for dessert tonight.

>>160583

I am genuinely pleased for you neet, good job

>>160587

lol

>>160558

technically, every pepe in this thread is now cached on your computer

>>160589

Pepe is the eternal meme.

>>160589

Along with lots of aboriginal porn

>>160582

Are your prices lower than dans?

>>160590

To be unlazy is to be unNEET

Do it yourself, I am proud of my shambles

>>160594

I was shit on for my lazy editing a while back.

>>160595

Do you giggle to yourself when you take poo pics?

>>160595

Better 6/10

>>160595

Marginally better than Friday's poo.

>>160599

A 4.5/10 then?

>>160597

No I salivate when I take them

Some fuckwit is doing doeys in the carpark

>>160602

Ask him to take you to Dan's.

>>160602

Someone's getting raped in my car park

>>160604

Different kind of doughnut.

>>160605

kek

who here NEETparting tonight?

>>160606

Two kek's, a lol, and an aha! today. I am truly blessed.

>>160610

Boongs don't sell goon

>>160607

After this bottle of red is finished, I am done for the night. Probably. 19.1 standard drinks should be enough.

>>160611

They sell their bodies for cash m8

>>160612

>19.1 standard drinks should be enough.

fug

>>160612

>Probably.

*unlikely

>>160615

I have to drive tomorrow.

>>160612

Theres 20std's in my favourite 2L sack of Rosaye

>>160617

I started my beers at 10:00am. I was done those by 3pm (I guess). That was 10.5 std. This cab sauv is 8.6 std, and I started it at 4.30pm or thereabouts. I don't have to drive until 9.15am tomorrow.

I'm 38/125kg/5'6 for those playing along with online calculators.

>>160607

I could never part from you lovely homosexuals

>>160620

You're a big guy, neet

>>160620

Good luck, hope you are good to drive tomorrow.

>>160622

*big

managerial

>>160620

Invest in a cheap chink breatho

I still haven't.

>>160622

>>160623

Thank you, Patreons.

I've been tested at work after a bottle of red the night before and registered 0.00, so I should be ok.

>>160623

He's almost CEO tier

>>160625

At least you're smart with your alcoholism. I hope you feel refreshed tomorrow morning for your drive

>>160626

Almost isn't good enough for me. He needs to keep working at it and he can get there, I believe in him. I hope he'll be entering the Nurgle 2018 fuzed/fuzzed to a chair competition.

>>160627

I'll be driving to the club with a bootload full of guns. Either the random breatho or the club will shake the cobwebs off.

>>160628

I can't recall any other neets having numbers that good

>>160630

I posted my belly once.

>>160303

Very good NEET.

>>160319

>Red Dead Redemption 2

Is that finally coming out?

>>160326

I get that reference, good song.

>>160333

Heavy petting.

>>160344

I put $90 in today too, I think I used all I put in.

Outside of the city it was consistently 10c cheaper. One was $1.53 iirc

>>160348

>>160354

>very low quality.

Ahh, ok. She looks part poojeeta

>>160633

Is there porn of girls like that being fucked by executives?

>>160633

All hail SkeleQueen.

>>160633

I'll snap your limbs, you disgusting piece of shit.

>>160375

Good work Weber, this is acceptable.

>>160407

That's pretty extreme man, hope you're alright now.

>>160413

I was too but like me you will be too thrifty and lazy to get it and use it.

>>160416

Goes it well although my angus is raw. Too long sitting.

>>160642

I do not appreciate your completely correct rude assumptions about me, neet

>>160633

Triglyceride enhanced individuals**

>>160647

Your skele tunnels won't feel so good when they're full of kfc fueled diarrhea

Emergency council meeting in 5 minutes to discuss the resurgent skele problem.

>>160649

It's time for the Sampson option.

>>160648

Kek

Bet the gooks are glad they never did that in 'Nam

>>160651

US had the right idea toward the end of the war… just pump the tunnel complex full of acetylene and ignite it.

>>160652

We can't kill the skeles because they are needed after the war

>>160653

Excellent.

>>160656

I can't make it

Too hungry

No energy

>>160657

Eat your state-allotted grain of rice.

>>160657

It's not too late to join the winning side. A few weeks of lard and oil and you will be a nurgle contender

Emergency no named NEET meeting in 10 minutes to discuss new places to hide during the upcoming war

>>160661

You must take a side, NEET. Fence-sitters will be treated just the same as the losers.

>>160663

When the fatties and the skeles are having heart attacks from their skirmishes the centrists will rise to the top

>>160665

It takes a true Executive to snack on a boong

>>160669

You're nothing if not persistent.

>>160670

Thank you.

>>160671

That wasn't really a compliment.

>>160466

>>160465

That's sort of why I stopped as well as well as wageing I doubt anyone wants to see yet another church and/or cemetery

>>160675

We actually do though.

>>160678

Must have eaten their gold stars when they got peckish…

>>160679

I would like to see the guy on the bottom right's anus. Rocking quite the thigh gap.

>>160681

Are you suggesting that I was suggesting that the skeles are of a jewish persuasion good sir ?

>>160680

Take your time. Don't get indigestion.

>>160683

Yes, yes I am.

>>160682

big, big poos

>>160686

I would never say such a thing about our (((skele))) brethren

>>160689

Dan will win, he supplies both sides

>>160689

SILENCE!

>>160690

Just like Vickers.

>>160692

Dan 2:Goon Day

>>160474

>years

It hasn't been that long and don't think we don't remember you.

>>160698

Ah, he's exageratesNEET

>>160689

Imagine if either of the others got themselves physically out.

>>160475

>shitcunts like Weber.

bit rude not entirely uncalled for

There are rumors of a council member collaborating with the skeles

>>160640

>skeleton

>face is fat anyway

Every time.

>>160702

Great, give away my plan m8.

Now I'll never get them to hide in my big stewpot

>>160701

I was being self-deprecating

>fridge sounds like it is about to take off

>punch it

>it shuts up

I am the discipliner of white goods

>>160706

I was unaware you were so tuned in to NEETlore.

Who am I?

>>160708

WHITE POWER

>>160710

You're that NEET that made that post that time

>>160710

Cruisey.

>>160713

>tfw sufficiently Dan'd

>>160715

I introduced this clip on a whim. It has since been posted over 9000 times.

>tfw insufficiently Craig'd

>>160489

So you are our regular infiltrator into the murky depths of discordia

>>160717

>It has since been posted over 9000 times.

*I have posted it over 9000 times

>>160719

If you mean I lurk on the Discord under the name 'Weber', than yes, SherlockNEET.

>>160712

If only the misso worked the same. They must have some other technique.

>>160720

*Respek knuckles*

>>160725

RUSE CRUISE

>>160725

Did you know the original picture was a GIF, with a moving magnifying glass?

>>160727

No it wasn't. You are trying to fool me.

>>160728

and I thought my office space was depressing…

>>160728

Is that lube on ur table?

>>160728

That's a nice bottle of lube there

>>160729

I'm not sure now. There is one GIF with a moving magnifying effect though.

>>160730

I have more lube in mine.

>>160728

> I promised a pic

Thank you.

REMINDER

We need that picture of the piss bottle that we were promised!

>>160734

More opportunity to use it too, I am sure. Nobody wants this exec.

>>160734

To make it better?

>>160735

That was not my promise.

>>160707

It's way better than Dan 3 rise of craig

>>160738

Sorry, it was a reminder for that NEET, he knows who he is.

>>160736

We want you weber.

One of my last offices was much better but I prefer the work I do downstairs so I got the office noone wanted after people rotated because I went upstairs.

SHE'S GOING TO GET YOU

>>160742

I hope she finds me…

>>160741

Is that place a house of some sort converted into office space?

Why don't I have a gf?

I just spent 37 minutes watching somebody fire up a steam locomotive from cold.

>>160746

Did it fire up your locomotive?