/ausneets/ - Aus NEETs

shit on my dick

>>138354

That is a good OP image. I think my boy Cruisey might like it. We will see.

thick juicy indian asses

>>138358

That'll be you inspecting his bits when he visits.

>>138362

Was he a NEET fatso do you think?

>>138365

It's possible, he didn't have too much to say, was busy stuffing his fat face with a big packet of salt and vinegar chips.

>>138366

Why didn't you tell him to put them away before he got in?

>>138366

I hope you wiped down the seat belt buckle and everything else he touched with his oily fingers.

>>138367

He reached into his bag and opened them while I was driving, I was nearly going to tell him not to but I'm worried about getting a bad rating.

>>138368

I did, he clearly left oily chip dust on the door handle and arm rest.

>>138369

You should have slammed on the brakes and asked what the fuck he was doing.

>>138371

Was literally a 15 minute drive too, bloody grub couldn't even wait.

>>138369

You probably made the right choice. It is not worth getting a bad rating over. Chip crumbs are better than some drunk slut's vomit everywhere.

I haven't done anything about DHCP/DNS yet

Might have a wank instead

>>138373

Yeah I didn't want to get into an argument or anything, but the mentality of some people..

>>138362

Do something for the environment m8, get an ant farm installed in your car instead. That'll take care of it.

>>138375

I'd actually be too embarassed to eat in front of a stranger in a confined space like that. It's fucking weird.

>>138377

Bad news, NEET. You did such an average job they've decided to make you permanent.

>>138374

Nothing like getting your priorities in order.

>>138366

Did you give him a bad rating?

>>138378

Me too, I would find it to be extremely rude, I don't even eat in my own car.

>>138381

Yes.

>>138382

How many stars?

>>138379

thats what im fearing, been talk about a summer position up for grabs, fuck i hope they dont ask me.

>>138378

thats not a very executive way of thinking

>>138386

Is that his gf?

>>138387

That's his wiper.

>>138383

1 star

>>138386

My car wouldn't be able to accommodate a CEO like that.

>>138389

That might be a bit harsh for a packet of chips.

>>138391

It was extremely irritating.

What are you listening to, NEETs?

>>138392

What happens if the GF pulls out a bag of crisps while you're driving along one day?

>>138393

Moonman, Mr Bond, and Johnny Rebel.

In the office

>>138394

Pushed out the door at high speed.

>>138386

Fake taxi FAT edition

>>138393

alot of hall and oates

>>138385

was she a chink, and if so what shade of yellow

>>138399

she was more of a dirty brown indogook

>>138400

she was just after your neet bux better off without her

>>138385

Get yourself a nice white girl mate.

>>138400

>indonesian

please tell me she wasn't a muslim

>>138401

I was just guessing. I'm sure the actual NEET who posted that will issue a correction if I'm wrong.

>>138393

Eivør

I wish we had gfs

>>138406

Go ride the town bike mate

>>138404

Your guesses were not welcome.

>>138408

Confirmed.

single parent household

>>138408

sounds like he was right

>>138411

You can cook for yourself now that you are a big boy mate.

>Smokin cones well I call cennos like a Boss mate

>>138411

Could you cook evening meals and get a second lunch out of leftovers each day?

>>138411

the sruggles of a wagie, at least my mummybot buys me food and sometimes even packs my lunch

>>138416

I have this too

>>138417

yeeeea mate

>>138413

>>138415

I would but I hardly have cash to buy myself groceries right now, I'd at least have to wait till next month to start doing that because of current bills. Plus the deli down the road makes some pretty good sandwiches for a decent price so I don't really have to unless I was really stretched for cash.

>>138416

What a kind mummybot

>>138420

what a well programed* mummybot

>>138419

what is your wagie hourly rate?

>>138419

Rack shit mate its just shopping without paying

>>138422

bit rude fella

>>138424

i'll show you mine if you show me yours ;)

Does rice go bad if exposed to air for several months?

>>138426

not if it was dry, i dont think

>>138426

Don't eat it if it has fuzz on it.

>>138422

$11/hr, trying to get a raise but I don't plan to stay here longer than a year

>>138423

With my janicart I can easily smuggle food from certain places with it and nobody would bat an eye, but I'd feel like shite.

>>138428

Its called Mold

>>138430

It's spelt 'mould' in this country.

>>138431

Zeig heil grammar nazi

>>138432

That's spelling, not grammar.

>>138434

durries dont cost 40 bucks a pack there

>>138432

Sieg Heil

Nazi

Comma between heil and grammar.

>>138434

What do ya expect janitors to get paid? We are but lowly maintainers of buildings.

>>138437

Get a janitor job at a highschool and sell dope to students for extra cash

>>138437

at least $20 aus an hour, i shovel snow off stairs and i get $26 - tax

I can smell my cummy cock

>>138440

Disgusting.

>>138440

Go and wash your Penis

>>138440

Post pics.

>>138438

Not a bad idea at all, especially around these parts. Kids buy weed off instagram these days too so it wouldn't be hard.

>>138439

Fuck's sake lad, at least where I work they offer a fuck ton of benefits. Shit like health insurance, financial aid for employees and bonuses. Though the bonuses are upwards of an extra $300+ we haven't been seeing them for ""safety"" reasons. Just got them this month but I won't be seeing a dime out of it unlike the others because I "haven't worked over 6 months yet lol"

>>138444

sorry to do this to you mate but i get all those benefits too + the day i started i got over $300 worth of winter/ski gear, but i dont get overtime or penalties

>>138445

did you get a gf?

>>138447

What part of canuckistan are you from?

65 hours without a duree

Doin good

>>138445

Ignore this ignorant cunt he doesn't understand the differences between USA and Australia in terms of cost of living. $11 an hour is a fine wage in the USA.

>>138447

ayy dont worry about it, every thing is way more expencive here so it all evens out in the end + the hours are mad, i have to wake up at 4am to get to work on time

>>138448

no gf, not that ive been looking but there are no gf to be found in my town who wouldnt want me to stop being a fucking weeb

>>138451

i was getting around to it cunt, you gotta push em down befor you can pick em back up again

>had a graveyard shift job as a janitor for an office

Is there no better feel?

The downside is that they're always cutting your hours because workers are fuckin expensive here.

>>138450

Good lad.

>>138451

Fuck the US

>>138456

Wew lad

No greater cess pool found any where else.

>>138454

I was getting paid $300 a week for two hours of cleaning at one point. Then the company started tightening up its outgoing expenses and fired me so they could hire an apex gang member who I assume is making $10 an hour under the table.

>>138450

Well done mate.

its fucking cold bros

>>138447

But….you get a work Vehicle though…..right?

>>138458

I like trump as a personality but they've there country and look at what it was. beautiful and untamed now look at it, it's rotting from underneath and you can set rivers on fire.

>>There the sub class of white people

>>138461

wer'e u @?

>>138461

It's raining here

>>138452

I did that yesterday.

>>138464

South West WA

>>138467

Bunners lad?

>>138466

Contemplation is the trait of a higher mind

>>138467

Me too bruv

i'm east of bunners

>>138468

Nah Albany

>>138472

Westralia familia

Fuckin ripper of a day here in Melbin, sun out got me like ooooh

>>138386

>tfw tumesced

Kalgoorlie is the Holyland ive been seeking

>>138477

Why?

>>138478

You can run down coons and get away with it

>>138477

Dude that is the dirtiest mud pit of them all, if you're not careful you'll end up dead, a crackhead or a bike

>from the former to the latter there all pretty fucken bad outcomes

>>138480

Have you even been there?

>>138481

One of my best friends worked in a pub there on the main drag, he said it was owned by bikes and he regularly had arguments with one and one time it to a point where he retorted back after a comment and the "initiate" came swinging back with a right hook and he ducked to grab his jacket coat and swung him down the bar onto the floor. Then Came with a right hook of his own and got him right on the side of his face and it all turned purple until at that point there club leader came in from out side and the reason Dennim had the job was cause his family was close with the owner "The club leader" he cooled the dude down and he got the rest off the night off and they sorted it apparently cause the dude had anger issues as he was knew so he was always trying to prove his shit and Dennim knew if he didn't defend him self and make a stand he'd cop it off this bloke for ages and it would get worse being a skinny bare kunckled 5.8 Irish kid.

>I lived with him for awhile, we we're good friends but haven't seen him in a fare while now don't even know what he would be up too

>>138482

I think it was the Gypsy Jokers.

>>138483

>>138482

We actually met too threw working together at a pub and getting into a fight but ended up being friends and living together funny enough.

Just got out of bed after a night of binge-drinking and whore-abusing then a morning of goon-before-nooning. Feels good man.

>>138485

How much are these whores setting ya back?

>>138487

A footlong sub n a can O sprite

>>138485

>whore-abusing

Tell us more please.

>>138489

>>138490

>>138491

Revolting images. Control yourself please.

IGA Liquor cravings coming on

>>138494

Feral

>>138497

That ones not too bad, probably would tbh

>>138498

After spraying it down in the back yard with the Kartcher.

>>138500

>I'd use oven cleaner mate

Having sprayed that on my face and left it accidentally for half an hour, I wouldn't recommend it.

>>138502

$$\left[\frac{ayy}{lmao}\right$$

>>138503

The math shit doesn't work here, despite the examples floating about.

>>138503

FUck me sideways

Uhh

$$\left[\frac{ayy}{lmao}]\right$$

>>138507

Lol

$$Fancy$$ $$is$$ $$the$$ $$way$$

>>138508

The pain

Ruinous thread

I'm going to go work on a floor and smoke weed, later ya flops

My stickfree wok just doesn't cut it compared to my frying pan, which is too small. How do those chinks on tv cook such big dishes in woks without having half the shit stick to the metal? Magic

>>138513

Got a cheeseburger yesterday. $3.15! What happened to the $2 cheesys

>>138512

They use a lot of oil and get the wok extremely hot.

>>138512

Every wok Ive seen has been shitty thin sheet metal that can't hold heat.

>>138512

oil

Some very low quality posts made here in recent time period.

>>138515

I do that too but still my ingredients get baked on

>>138518

la da fuckin' da

>>138513

My local maccas demand you go through the drive-through to redeem the app. This is NEET discrimination.

>>138519

Might be just a dodgy wok

>>138522

asian

dodgy

INCONCEIVABLE!

>>138521

And they have signs to prevent you walking through the drive through.

They don't, however, have signs about driving through in reverse and using the passenger window to order.

>>138524

Wise NEET words to exact petty satisfaction.

>>138512

Forget the non stick variety, when you buy ur next wok Season it, simple as that, as for all those shows on tv most use a wok burner, it gets a lot hotter than your normal stovetop, so you need very little oil

>>138526

The chinks still love to put the oil in by the ladle full though.

Only doggo meat doesn't stick to woks.

>>138526

You're assuming a half-decent grade of steel that can be seasoned. Most of the woks I've seen are shitty 1/8" sheet metal.

>>138529

I have used a cheap arsed aluminium wok for over 20 years, seasoned it and nothing has ever stuck, it's black on the outside and black on the inside, people tend to scrub things so they shine, the last thing you do to a wok

>>138292

Please tell me you've found a way that all of us can easily do to make money online.

>>138533

Funny, but cheesey doesn't have a licence.

>>138535

Way to rub it in, m8.

>>138535

It wasn't funny.

Gained 3 kilos over the past week

thought yall ought to know

>>138536

Sorry.

>>138538

Of muscle? Well done mate.

>>138538

I haven't been able to change my outfit all week as nothing fits anymore.

>>138538

Quite an achievement.

Any bottleshop recommendations?

Boycotting Dan for a bit

>>138543

Find a non-chain one.

>>138543

First choice, consistently lower prices than that scamming Irish bastard.

>>138543

Magill Estate

>>138541

You are out of control.

>>138547

I've eaten 3 meals since Sunday.

>>138549

How many calories per meal?

>>138550

Dunno.

Monday I had a bacon sandwich as I had to use some bacon before it expired.

Yesterday I had a couple of pork/veal meatballs.

Tonight I had a potato.

Need to make up a new NEET challenge that encourages our more portly to slim down.

>>138551

>Tonight I had a potato

Just one? You could have treated yourself to a few without doing any harm.

>>138333

Brazil-bro, teach me how to GIF.

>>138546

https://www.magillestaterestaurant.com/-/media/Files/Magill-Estate-Restaurant/Magill-Estate-Restaurant-Sample-Menu-2018.ashx

Look at the prices and the shit you get to eat. Not a tendie to be seen.

>>138554

Just one with salt. It was shit.

>>138557

Which variety of potato was it? How was it cooked?

>>138558

A pink one (Desiree or some shit). Microwave.

>>138341

>what are you thinking of getting?

Danned, obviously.

>>138349

#Metoo

Had a tremendous nap bros

>>138560

#Metoo

#Mepoo

>>138559

Your body is probably so used to revolting food in enormous quantities that it is no longer able to appreciate the simple and subtle pleasure of something like a humble potato.

>>138374

You useless. Piece. Of NEET.

>>138385

What's a good dating app/site to meet visa-hungry gooks?

>>138565

>What's a good dating app/site to meet visa-hungry gooks?

ebay

It was nice and warm outside today. A hint of spring in the air, dare I say. My apricot tree is showing signs of new growth after its winter dormancy.

bumble is some shit

only girls can message first and you can't even see who you're matched with so even a handsome NEET like me ends up with fifty unknown matches and 0 messages

>>138567

Was freezing here today.

>>138565

>dating app/site to meet visa-hungry gooks

My last hope to lose my virginity to someone who isn't, technically a hooker.

>>138568

Just ask girls out in person. Saved me visiting KFC.

>>138410

Present

>>138414

>The van life

>>138571

oof

>>138567

Will you make an Apricot pie?

>>138571

Have you seen that girl at the KFC since she rejected you?

>>138574

The birds tend to get all the apricots. I could invest in some netting I suppose.

>>138439

It's all relative nigger. Shit costs less in Burgerland than it does here.

>>138451

Well said, though why am I bothering to contribute my opinion to a conversation that ended hours ago?

>>138575

He should go back when she's on and order a Family Feast and a side order of Rejection

>>138575

Haven't been back.

>>138578

very droll, cunt

>>138576

Get an air rifle.

>>138581

Flame thrower

>>138583

That's not a dinner.

>>138583

Comfy

Back from Danny boys, the boycot will have to wait. They have these color printouts of Dans face on the end of the aisles, I could hardly control my laughter seeing it. Even pulling up and seeing his face out front has me cackle a bit.

Cheers, deadshits

>>138583

That is Tier 3 quality food.

>>138586

What did you buy m8?

>>138587

Is tier 3 better or worse than tier 1?

>>138579

Probably for the best.

>>138295

>Apologise to the boss.

The bloke running the seminar kept on about the shit I said yesterday and it sort of became a central point.

>>138300

/intl/ didn't do anything wrong

>>138321

The missus drinks fronti non alco wine. Tastes like shit.

>>138588

6pack of oettinger tallboys

Keeping it reasonable, maybe Friday arvo I'll pick up a fresh sack of some quality goon

>>138589

Worse. Tier 1 is best. Tier 3 is pretty bad but could be worse. Tier 3 is edible but not really good enough for a properly fancy NEET.

>>138328

I've been doing them all day, even around people. The fear that they heard caused great anxiety.

>>138334

farkoff mate

>>138342

Yes

>>138346

Dan will never match Booze Brothers

>>138592

>6pack

Will that be enough?

>>138593

Thank you for clarifying. We all need to be using the same scale.

>>138580

I didn't mean it to be nasty m8, I meant go back and throw it back in her face, show her she doesn't matter or what she thinks

>>138596

they are two standards each so he could get pretty boonged still

>>138592

That's a good choice. I don't mind it.

>>138601

Welcome home my friend. How was work?

>>138601

He's going to be wearing you like a gonola hat when you visit.

>>138362

Have an exception stating that they need to buy you an equally priced feed.

Homoerotic NEETencounter

tahlia's chance encounter with neetking

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VlueSmy_GoQ

What a banger

>>138602

I stated a few posts prior to this one.

Are you not keeping up with your gen etiquette?

>>138603

Hope he has a ribbed haircut.

>>138606

Horrific.

>>138463

>but they've there country

?

>and you can set rivers on fire

That shit's happening here as well.

>There the sub class of white people

?

>>138608

He doesn't deserve you, Cruisey.

>>138611

You sound like a younger possum, like when he first fell for me.

Don't say that sort of stuff too loudly, he is a jealous NEET

>>138363

go on

>>138613

No dinner and I have to look at those bloody hand me down curtains every night while you cry and purr in your shed.

>>138591

>it sort of became a central point

What has been going on there? I got a bit worried when you said your dad told you to calm down and then you said you had "arced up" at your boss. Is everything sorted out now?

>>138617

Do you put stuffing in your sangas?

Bought some beer nuts. They're like anti-morish for a snack. You have one, you enjoy it, you try to have a mouthful it's like having the Salt Lord cum into your mouth while casings get their shit everywhere.

>>138617

Had that for breakfast. Had some shitty stirfry for dinner. Tried to fry the rice in the wok but it just because soggy.

>>138619

Just brush the casings off when you finish the bag

>>138617

That "pork stuffing" product looks interesting. I have never seen that at my Coles.

>>138385

DUDE

what the fuck? Is the window only a week long?

I'd say go back and get another but there are plenty here already, whip out that NEETcharm.

>>138618

Sometimes, I like it.

>so today I am

>>138615

I legit feel sick about these curtains. I can hardly stand to go into the kitchen any more.

>>138622

Are those colored to look like bottles of piss?

>>138616

No but he has sort of accepted part responsibility.

The down side is that he will spend a bit of time teaching me then I wont have an excuse. I am actually getting used to doing nothing. I probably shouldn't've said anything.

>>138624

They are fine.

>>138626

>I am actually getting used to doing nothing

Is that the problem? You don't have anything to do all day?

>>138625

After a while piss bottle juice tastes like mountain dew, you just need to leave it for a few months and turn them weekly so the sediment doesn't solidify.

Try it and you will be pleasantly surprised.

>>138467

Not much in the way of insulation in a 40 year old caravan.

>>138475

Any encounters with the African-Australian community lately?

>>138627

NEETFIGHT!

>>138632

cruisy meat is highly sought after.

I have enough to go around but I aim to please and he will not share.

>>138628

No they are terrible. But they are only curtains and it doesn't really matter in the larger scheme of things.

>>138629

In this new role, yes.

But I sort of have a deadline and I might be held accountable for not delivering.

>>138634

THEY ARE FINE.

How big are they?

>>138624

You should get one of those 500% interest payday loans to buy some new curtains.

>>138389

Ruthless.

Watch out he doesn't return.

Any of you execs know how to get rid of chafing between your nutsack and thigh? Had it for almost 2 weeks now and I'm starting to scratch the skin off

Whats your job cheesy

>>138640

moisturise and identify the clothing that caused it and stop wearing it.

>>138627

The possums are in my employ.

>>138393

I've had this song stuck in my head all day. Didn't know it was Cliff though.

Don't know where I picked it up from either. I didn't listen to the radio on the way to work.

It's so cold that I am considering warming my goon in the microwave

>>138640

A soothing lotion.

>>138646

Put it in the kettle

>>138636

1.5 metres across. They are awful I don't know why you insist on arguing the contrary when you haven't even seen them.

I cut the bottom with a pair of scissors and it is all uneven. The colour is so bright and clashes so badly. It is an absolute disaster.

>>138648

the bag won't fit mate

>>138399

He posted a pic once.

>>138647

vaseline is best for that, there is a reason professional cyclists rub it all over themselves

>>138649

Should have asked me how to do it before you did it. There's a special type of scissors for that.

>>138652

I thought that was because they are degenerate faggots.

>>138652

I thought that was because they are homosexuals

>>138647

What about a balm or a salve?

A shooting motion

>>138643

Then you made a mistake because it was the possums that made me interesting and let me attract Tier 1 NEETs into my circle.

>>138654

>>138655

Great minds.

>>138651

That was just a tinder floozy wasn't it? I hope he didn't make her his gf.

>>138656

Calamine is best.

But baby powder is what you actually want.

>>138659

this happens way too often to be a mere coincidence

>>138658

One word from me and your friend's visit becomes the date from hell…

>>138480

>if you're not careful you'll end up a bike

I would not wish upon my worst enemy such a fate as to be ridden 5 days every week by mid-40 lycra-clad businessmen.

>>138482

>owned by bikes

Have the machines finally taken over?

Also, >tfw skinny bare-knuckled man-child

>>138660

I forget which one was which.

>>138662

We're the real NEET power couple, not Cruisey and Pussum.

>>138653

I knew it would turn out bad but it was not meant to be a permanent thing. Even if I had cut them right the colour is so awful they could not remain there.

>>138666

Who needs a neetname when you have love

>>138410

Single father household.

>>138668

Satan's love is only temporary.

>>138645

Did you flirt with any devil women today?

>>138670

so is life itself my friend

I got me one of those twatters and have been esoterically shitposting

>>138673

I had one of those back in 2009

>>138411

When I was cleaning I could never eat lunch, made me drowsy. You do need a hearty breakfast though if you can.

>>138659

Low grade minds.

>>138676

NEET-a-lectuals

>>138671

She wasn't there, I think she's in tomorrow.

>and here I am posting this >>138670

I can't help myself either.

>>138664

Kalgoorlie is a drug, gang infested shit hole of a town..

Smoking a cone before my big fat cum filled wank

Wanna fuck Toilet Duck

>>138679

Hannan St. Represent

>>138678

>I can't help myself

At least you are admitting it.

>>138683

EQi training worked I guess.

>>138680

Legend mate i'm about to smoke one now well I listen to the beautiful crackling sound of bacon fill my caravan with it's aroma.

>>138424

Is it?

>>138684

I can't believe a workplace downed tools for two days so people could talk about their feelings.

>>138686

It can be.

>>138430

>>138431

>>138432

>>138433

heh

>>138687

Only four of us.

The pompous upper management.

Those lowly common folk can keep working.

>>138692

Somebody dies once every year at mine and they just send out a safety notice.

Which is a more suitable NEET dwelling, warehouse or caravan?

>>138450

On ya cuz

>>138694

Warehouse.

>>138693

Four letter agency work sounds rough, stay safe mate.

>>138456

Yeah, fuck them cunts.

Yankie doodle was the nations lullaby, now it's ting tang walla walla bing bang

>>138477

I like the big hole.

>>138694

whorehouse

>>138694

warehouse

>>138482

>worked in a pub there on the main drag

Was she a skimpy?

>>138701

Beef and oriental chicken are both better in my humble opinion.

>>138704

Caravan mate

>>138705

you dip

>>138703

It was a he, not a she.

>He was a bar tender, general bar duty's included.

>>138706

You trip

they somehow already banned my twitter account

>>138709

Did you have a Pepe avatar? That got mine killed immediately.

>>138710

That and sending racial slurs to @jack

>>138710

Nah I said we need a housing price crash

>>138713

>tfw no reverse tranny avocado loving "whateverthefuck"f

>>138714

Ha ha ha ha, Don't insult the rich mothafucka

>>138709

Twitter fag

>>138717

Sage is on again.

>>138717

My twitter 29/8/18 6:50 to 29/8/18 7:11

>>138719

gone too soon

>>138487

I never had any intention of paying them, just prank-calling them and wasting their whoreish time.

>>138492

The gooks put a condom over muh door knob. Didn't notice until I woke up. It's a love-hate relationship I have with them.

>>138722

/r/aryangoddess

I started another one and died in a fucking minute

I asked Trump "Where is the fucking wall you Kushner cock loving kike" and then it asked for my phone immediately

>>138534

hah, pretty cool.

>>138724

You're just getting robo-killed.

Not providing a mobile number does it within minutes.

>>138715

>Dr Eiffel I'm N.S.D.A.P

>>138723