[–]▶ 8b8d4e (2) No.14263>>14283 >>14289 >>14292 >>24946 >>24964 >>24980 >>24990 [Watch Thread][Show All Posts]
>The date is April 5, 2063, and you're in Bozeman, Montana
>You've somehow replaced Zephram Cochrane as the person fated to pilot the experimental Phoenix spacecraft
>It makes a successful jump to warp and your landing is uneventful
>Soon after, an alien ship lands nearby
>Aliens are real, and they want to meet the person who flew that warp ship
How would you make a lasting first impression to the Vulcans, /strek/?
Hard Mode: You are totally unfamiliar with them or their culture, so you can't impress (or annoy) them based on you knowing about their lack of emotions and adherence to logic.
____________________________
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▶ a0bcf0 (1) No.14266>>14279 >>14280
Hey buddy I think you've got the wrong planet, the leatherclub is two systems down!
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▶ 1b2b1f (1) No.14268>>14279
Err, you don't get to bring friends?
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▶ 368b6b (1) No.14271>>14279
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▶ 85c7e9 (1) No.14273>>14279
>How do you make a lasting first impression
Whip out my dick and start screaming like a howler monkey.
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▶ 73e567 (1) No.14275>>14279
Excuse me Sir, do you have a permit to park your ship there?
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▶ d6fc71 (1) No.14277>>14279
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
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▶ 91b079 (1) No.14278>>14279
Perform a german suplex on his assistant while the rest of the crowd sings We Will Rock You loud enough to shake the ground.
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▶ 8b8d4e (2) No.14279>>14286 >>14325
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>14266
>>14268
>>14271
>>14273
>>14275
>>14277
>>14278
I shudder to imagine what kind of mirror universes would spawn from these actions.
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▶ 55b279 (1) No.14280>>14358
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
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▶ 29b7ba (1) No.14283
>>14263 (OP)
>Aliens are real, and they want to meet the person who flew that warp ship
Why? If traveling faster than light is easy enough for a drunkard living in a shanty can do it, then any visiting alien will be amazed I'm not shitting directly into my water supply.
Combine sodium hydroxide (careful), water, and various oils to make a hard substance
Regularly rub your new creation with running water all over your body to prevent the spread of disease.
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▶ 78d4d0 (2) No.14286>>14325
>>14279
If we consider the first episode of Enterprise then Cochrane would have saved humanity a lot of time, effort, and trouble if he'd just shot the Vulcans, stolen their shit, and then contacted every other faction on Earth
>"Umm, hey guys. I know we've all been trying to kill each other for a very long time now. But we've just met aliens (and they look like total bastards). We're planning on building copies of their spaceship and conquering/looting everything we find out there. Anybody want to come along?"
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▶ 534c9c (1) No.14289
>>14263 (OP)
I invite him to the gym to lift.
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▶ 1be825 (2) No.14292>>14312
>>14263 (OP)
"Hey"
"Um, my world is burnt to cinders thanks to a dumbass war, you wouldn't happen to know of any habitable worlds nearby, just one, maybe two?"
"Yeah, we need help. Stay a while, and I can try to explain things as best I can"
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▶ 9897ef (3) No.14312>>14323 >>14393
>>14292
Wow that's like that shit "How it should have ended" channel. Just whip out the dick and make them shake it.
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▶ 6b5f0d (1) No.14317>>14320 >>14322
"Oh thank God, those scientists were wrong, and there is fuckable alien life!"
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▶ 9897ef (3) No.14320
>>14317
>t.George Samuel Kirk
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▶ 78d4d0 (2) No.14322
>>14317
>Vulcans
>Fuckable
>Not holding out for superior Cardassian or Andorian waifu.
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▶ 1beea8 (2) No.14323>>14370
>>14312
>Just whip out the dick and make them shake it.
I thought that the moment I saw the first post, but I didn't want to be the one to post it.
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▶ 2bcc08 (1) No.14325
>>14279
>>14286
I'm pretty sure in the mirror universe cochrane officially valiantly shot to death this vulcan invasion force stole their ship and then years later invaded and enslaved vulcan. terran empire ftw
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▶ 03912d (1) No.14358
>>14280
Kek, but it still seems off. could be better
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▶ 9897ef (3) No.14370>>14371
>>14323
taking initiative is a main feature of entrepreneurship, entrepreneurship leads to enterprise. Thus I AM THE REAL LIFE CAPTAIN OF THE ENTERPRISE.
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▶ 1beea8 (2) No.14371
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▶ 1be825 (2) No.14393
>>14312
What? Im making fun of Archer's attitude towards Vulcans.
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▶ 046466 (1) No.17818
When he takes off the hood reply with "Our daddy told us not to be ashamed of our ears, especially since they such great size n'all"
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▶ 104555 (1) No.17822
PRAISE BE TO POSADAS, OUR SAVIOURS HAVE COME
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▶ e4feb9 (1) No.18189
Demand to know if their women are cute.
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▶ 546697 (1) No.21036
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▶ 1407bd (2) No.24946>>25030
>>14263 (OP)
I'd try to keep my cool and mimic their behaviors within reason, but at the end I'd probably just end up giving the Vulcan in charge a hug and crying on his shoulder from sheer joy at finally meeting a real-life friendly ayy. To which he would no doubt respond with something like pic related.
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▶ 923fb6 (1) No.24953
the mirror universe approach is the only right one
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▶ da26f1 (1) No.24964
>>14263 (OP)
"Welcome to the planet Vulcan, traveller. We are Vulcans and even tho your visit is highly illogical, we offer you our friendship. Wanna mind melt later?"
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▶ dc538e (1) No.24966>>24969
I'd take a Vulcan waifu and show her the power of the emotional cock.
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▶ 506b7c (1) No.24969
>>24966
>Anon breaks down weeping halfway through his first time with his waifu
<"Anon, my prior reading into traditional human customs would suggest that this is not a normal part of the human mating ritual."
>"I'M TRYING TO SHOW YOU HOW EMOTIONS WOOOOOOOORK!!!!!!"
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▶ 2f52b7 (1) No.24980
>>14263 (OP)
>How would you make a lasting first impression to the Vulcans, /strek/?
RAID HIS SHIP
GRAB EVERYTHING YOU CAN!
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▶ b03d06 (1) No.24990
>>14263 (OP)
>wrong fuckin town elf lezbo
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▶ 863f7b (1) No.25030>>25034
>>24946
Internally ofcourse.
Vulcan s tend to frown on outward displays of emotion…
Well not literally frown
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▶ 1407bd (2) No.25034
>>25030
Yep, which is unfortunate because no matter how much I try I would probably be unable to resist expressing some kind of intense joy or elation from their arrival. I'd hope they would understand regardless of their disdain for outward expressions of emotion.
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▶ 04d769 (1) No.25037>>25044
ONE STUDY SAYS THERE ARE AT LEAST 5000 UNREGISTERED ALIENS LIVING ON PLANET EARTH. THEY AREN'T BRINING THEIR BEST, THEY BRING DRUGS, CRIME, AND SOME OF THEM I IMAGINE ARE GOOD PEOPLE. I WILL BUILD A DYSON SPHERE AROUND THE EARTH AND MAKE VULCAN PAY FOR IT. TERRA PRIME FOREVER
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▶ 1d9a0f (1) No.25038
They have a pretty good idea what they are getting into when they initiate first contact.
They would have thought through it carefully and would know how you are going to react probably better than you yourself. Keep in mind they have been watching us looking for the right person, the right moment, the best conditions to reveal themselves.
Just be yourself, (unless you are some kindof freak, which if you were they already know and picked someone else to talk to) and you will be fine.
To expect anything else would be illogical…
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▶ 599bf9 (1) No.25044
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