/random/ - random

HAHAHAHA @ NUMBER "ON"

HAHAHAHAHAHA

pay attention...

I MADE A MISTAKE

I WASNT PAYING ATTENTION

I SLIPPED UP

I MADE A STUPID PRIMAL MISTAKE

AND IM OKAY WITH THAT

CONOR'S LIFE LESSON NUMBER TWO:

WE ALL MAKE STUPID MISTAKES

EMBRACE THEM

never build a wall of distractions and denial to hide or 'explain' away your obvious mistakes

it makes you seem scared and weak

EMBRACE YOUR MISTAKES

OWN THEM

like the continual mistake you've been making every day

CONOR'S LIFE LESSON NUMBER THREE:

REFER BACK TO CONOR'S LIFE LESSON NUMBER "ON"

it's really just THAT simple

you aren't stupid......

You're NOT as smart

as you're going to be

but you're not a dumbass

TIME TO STOP BEHAVING LIKE A SCHMUCK, DUDE

stop ALLOWING yourself to behave like a dumbass

CONOR'S LIFE LESSON NUMBER FOUR:

You already know how to behave, so stop pretending like you don't know what the fuck you're doing

it's really just THAT simple

you aren't stupid......

You're NOT as smart

as you're going to be

but you're not a dumbass

TIME TO STOP BEHAVING LIKE A SCHMUCK, DUDE

stop ALLOWING yourself to behave like a dumbass

CONOR'S LIFE LESSON NUMBER FIVE:

I'm already drunk as fuck and about to roll another big fat doobie of some monster ass kush

I've never been happier in my life

This is 100% true

Yet simultaneously, it would be equally as honest to admit I've never been more miserable in my entire life...

Because as you already know, it's all a matter of perspective

CONOR'S LIFE LESSON NUMBER FIVE:

My wife and I just went and ate lunch at a pretty cool little Mexican joint and had delicious vegetarian lunch Gringo Style

And a couple Modelo Negros before I bought a bottle of single malt scotch

And there was an old man in the parking lot literally struggling to drag himself to his car using permanent crutches

Not the stupid wooden crutches

He had the metal crutches with the arm braces at top, because he's permanently unable to walk

The poor old schmuck was literally dragging himself 6 in at a time, dragging one dead foot behind the other, trying to make his way to a specially rigged vehicle that he could obviously drive without his legs

So next time you feel sorry for yourself, eat shit

CONOR'S LIFE LESSON NUMBER SIX:

EAT SHIT

Nobody promised life was going to be smooth

There never was a guarantee things were going to be easy

So if you ever feel special, entitled.. just imagine one of my stinking steaming turds slowly sliding out of my hairy feces encrusted asshole...

And eat it

CONOR'S LIFE LESSON NUMBER SEVEN:

You never going to get to the top of the staircase until you start putting one foot in front of the other, as the old Disney song used to say....

You're never going to swim until you jump into the pool

And you're never going to accomplish anything without accomplishing it first

CONOR'S LIFE LESSON NUMBER NINE:

Number 9 number 9 number 9bnumber 9 number 9 number 9 number 9 number 9 number 9

.......that's rightright....

THE BEATLES

If you aren't already a gigantic Beatles fan, that means you don't understand music

sink your head into the Beatles

Begin with the RUBBER SOUL album

( where they started taking LSD and it changed their music and the trajectory of History )

And work your way up to the very end

The Beatles were really Paul McCartney to be honest, because John Lennon was highly overrated, but without Lennon, McCartney never would have been able to craft the Beatles into the most breathtakingly talented musical group in the history of the human race

If you want to attract good energy and beautiful women and loyal friends, you need to become a giant Beatles fan

and ?......

drumroll, please..........

CONOR'S LIFE LESSON NUMBER TEN:

Life's what you make it

And stop focusing on humans

Human beings are worthless garbage

All humans are garbage, including you and I

Help animals instead

They deserve the karma

Humans have created their own problems

Help animals instead

Make life better for them at every opportunity, even if it means spending your last penny just to see a starving animal have a meal

If you believe in a god, then your God would whisper in your ear " he's telling you the truth about animals"

Make life better for them

LIFES WHAT YOU MAKE IT

THE END

Stop focusing on yourself so much

I created this remix using only my smartphone after my mother passed away

Make the most of it

I even created the video with my smartphone. No computer this time

GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER, DUDE

The longer it takes you, the stupider you will look in retrospect

Nobody can solve your problem except forYOU

But you've known that the entire time

So stop dragging your feet and shape up, Soldier

People gravitate towards other people who have something happening

Who have their "own thing" happening

A motivational energy field

Whatever it might be, make it happen

Nobody's attracted to self-loathing or doubt or uncertainty or inactivity

Keep making it happen whatever it might be

And it will create its own aura that follows you

Whatever it might be, make sure it's actually alive.. make sure it's actually happening, not just a hypothetical future possibility

Create an entity around yourself

And when you walk in a room

People will feel it

CONFIDENCE is a behavior

I used to be a strip club DJ for 10 years in atlanta, back in the good old days when we were guaranteed at least $1,600 cash tax-free every night.. even on the slow nights, we would never walk out the door with less than $1,600 cash

Imagine getting paid that much money to play records, drink for free, and fuck every woman who walked through the door of the strip club, whether it be a waitress a bartender a dancer and audition or just the occasional female customer off the street

Sounds great until you do it, and then you realize life's what you make it, because soon enough, the DJ booth becomes a coffin with two turntables

you would never believe how many strippers used to come up into my DJ booth and ask me, "what would you think if I got a boob job?"

or equally as often: " what would you think if I got a tattoo right here?"

and without variation, I would always tell them the exact same answer :

" that would be the second stupidest decision of your life, with the first being the decision to become a stripper in the first place"'

And then I would MY famous question :

"what's the most attractive feature on a woman?"

And they'd always answer, "big boobs?"

or "a nice ass?"

nope..... wrong !!!

the most attractive feature on any human being is SELF CONFIDENCE

It doesn't matter, man or woman, young or old.. black white green or in between....

It doesn't matter if you've got buck teeth and crossed eyes and a pig nose three tits or a penis smaller than Donald Trump's....

SELF CONFIDENCE IS MAGNETIC

Literally everybody gravitates towards somebody with self-confidence

Not a false air of arrogance, but a real honest relaxed sense of self-confidence

The weirder you are, the more the self-confidence works

The uglier you are, the more effect self-confidence has

Stop acting like a douchebag

M A K E S O M E T H I N G H A P P E N

And most importantly of all....

If there's anything I really needed to convey to you.....

STOP THE RELIGION DELUSION

It's fake. It's imaginary.

Even worse, it's not even from your own imagination.. it's completely unoriginal, and imaginary fairy tale created by some loser a long long time ago

And I'm not specifically talking about Christianity

ALL religions are identical because they are all FABRICATED GARBAGE

There never was a Horace and there never was a Krishna and there never was a Jesus and that's all just a bunch of childish sticks and stones ooga ooga monkey brain bullshit

HORUS*

Horus was the first ofSIXTEEN JESUS MYTHS

Horus was the first...

There were 15 more after him...

And all of them were born on December 25th

All of them were nothing more than myth

All of them had a virgin mother

All of them had 12 Memphis Mafia bodyguard disciple types

All of them performed miracles LOL bullshit

All of them were persecuted because they were the "son of God"

All of them were murdered

And all of them resurrected 3 days later

There were 16 of these Jesus myths

AND THE 17TH 2ASYOUR FAKE JESUS STORY

Research it.. don't believe what I'm telling you, research it for yourself

How could there have been 16 identical stories, beginning thousands and thousands of years before your imaginary Jesus was never actually born?

Are you going to tell me the first 16 were all mythology..... and it's just a mere coincidence that your imaginary Jesus happened to be born on December 25th to a virgin mother, had 12 disciples and performed miracles, was the son of god, murdered and resurrected three days later?.....

Doesn't that seem like a far-fetched coincidence to you?

( that sinking feeling in your stomach is the realization that you invested your life's belief system into a fairy tale, without demanding any proof whatsoever before jumping in head first )

If you want to be happy

STOP BELIEVING IN FAIRY TALES

If there was a god, we would have proven it by now.. we can see the edge of the Big Bang.. so we would certainly have to determined how to discover God by this point

There never was a Jesus.. that entire story is complete hogwash

And by voluntarily imprisoning yourself with the chains of religion, you are always going to be a prisoner, no matter what circumstances come your way

If you do something wonderful, it's not because of a telepathic Bigfoot in the clouds

It's because of your own excellence

And if you do something deplorable, the imaginary Sasquatch in the sky won't equate you of the crime

You can't blame your own inner poison on some imaginary Satan

YOU ARE GOD OR DEMON

It's your own choice, your own behavior. And it has nothing to do with an imaginary Boogeyman that somebody else fabricated centuries ago

( notice I said centuries, because the names Daniel and Timothy and Luke and Paul and Mark and John did not exist until 600 years ago )

and STOP EMULATING NIGGERS

STOP SAYINGYO

STOP USING KANYA NIGGERLIPS AS A STANDARD

STOP PRETENDING TO BE SOMETHING YOURE NOT

And even if you happened to be black, YOURE STILL NOT A NIGGER

so stop emulating them

You're not an old grandfather, so you don't act like an old grandfather

You're not a white trash trailer park country bumpkin, so you don't act like a white trash trailer park country bumpkin

You're not a Mediterranean Olive salesman, so you don't act like a Mediterranean Olive salesman

So why would you behave like a nigger?

lol @ people who celebrate christmas