theonedemon dontpossess itself
I was possessed by a demon very briefly once.
I was experiencing severe anxiety for years
Sometimes very severe to the point of depersonalization.
It works like this: Our egos rely on our external environment for their validation, Me, you, that tree.
Anxiety causes the old fear/flight mechanism to fire off 50,000 years ago we had real dangers:being eaten by a large cat, starving, etc.
Today we still worry, and have anxiety, dread, angst, etc, about our uncertain futures and alienation, modern day loneliness and meaningless(you don't think about these things anymore like if you might be eaten just looking for a meal)
But there is no cat out there today, no stranger with a spear waiting outside your door, but we still feel the fight/flight fear.
so in my state of heightened vigilance,fear, I was saying,unconsciously, "where is it, where is it, the thing that's trying to get me", but there is nothing there.
This vague uncertainy weakens my attention to my surrounding. My attention becomes dulled
We build our egos on this relationship to our environments.
When the environment becomes blurred, so do our egos.
In my case, my severely blurred ego from my severely blurred relationship to my environment led to depersonalization
My ego vanished.
Some drugs can do this, such as the dissociative drugs like pcp, or cough medicine(psychedelics will do it to some degree also, but to the extent of the dissociative drugs )
I've never tried dissociative drugs because the feelings of depersonalization that I experienced were horrible.
At the peak of my depersonalization i felt that a demonic presence had entered me.
when I say 'me', I meant that I could only put this into words after the depersonalization had ameliorated somewhat.
My ego was obliterated, there was no 'I'.
Now from self analysis of the event afterward, the 'demon that I experienced may have been pure hostility towards certain members of my family, and because my ego was almost non-existence at that moment, the feeling of hostility that "I" had was all.
There was no me experiencing this hostility, being, nonbeing and hostility were one.
I was possessed.
Some people with less insight may have let the demon pick up an axe and give your fam 40 whacks
