So, for some time now I am being able to not fap. I decided for several reasons, one of them being religious and the other one being the fact that porn is bad for our minds and can make us sick perverts.
What troubles em the most is the fact that I like to make use of some kind of entertainment that appeals to my urges.
What I mean is, i read some novels, play some japanese gaymes e so on, and all of those can be really erotic at some time. I was playing a VN where the protagonist ends up fucking some girls, and it comes all together with animated CGs and moans. I do not play/read/watch those medias to fap or to feel aroused, the porn just comes with it. Of course I get a hard on, but I'm able to control myself and keep going.
My fear is if it's ok or not to use those medias when what I want the most is to "clean" my brain of the malefic side of porn. I'm not fapping, but I' kind of watching/reading porn, is this still affecting my brain or the fact that I'm not fapping makes it ok?