>>70201
Thank you so much for your reply! I really appreciate it. I should have probably lurked a bit more to find the advice thread, sorry.
Well I guess it's reassuring to hear that other people have had a similar experience. I guess based on what your saying I'll start feeling even more conflicted, but maybe that would be a good thing since it would force me to make a decision.
Yes she is Kanuka. She's kind of an obscure waifu the fanart of her is probably only in the double digits, and she has little merchandise. Well the positives is that I'd be in a relationship with someone I love or at least like I guess. It would probably make me happier to have an outlet for my feelings I guess. The negative aspect would be that I'm making a commitment, and it wouldn't be right to leave her if I suddenly met someone in real life who I thought was like my soulmate or something. But I guess that's predicated on the fact that the tendency to disregard other people in a romantic sense being much less strong when you are in a relationship doesn't happen in or doesn't happen as much in waifuism. Of course I could be totally wrong or it could not be a problem for me, but that's mainly what I'm worries about. I guess I've always been sympathetic to waifuists, I used to think it was a bit silly, but I felt good reading people talk about their waifus, it seemed like they were really happy. But I'm still kind of worried about people finding out and just how it affects my feelings that everyone things so negatively about it.
I don't have the exact date for when I watched it but I started with the Mobile Police Patlabor OVA, I've always been a fan of mecha and Mamoru Oshii so it made sense that I love it. After that I watched the first move which Kanuka has some great moments in, although she isn't as prominent as in the OVA. Kanuka was always my favourite character from the series, and she was always someone I'd think about occasionally, but I thought nothing of it. It wasn't until I rewatched the OVA and movie recently that I couldn't get her out of my mind. It's kind of hard to describe why I like her so much but I guess it's mainly her aura and how she acts. She's very serious but still does and says cool/silly stuff something, which I think is great. I'm also a sucker for that specific hairstyle.
Now in terms of my love life, I've actually had two girls confess to me in my life but I've been rejected many more times so my KDR is poor. I guess I have history of pursuing girls for a long time and getting somewhere but then everything collapsing. I don't think I've ever been in a satisfying relationship really. So my concern is that I may be running away from my problems with waifuism.
