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/cyber/ - Cyberpunk & Science Fiction

A board dedicated to all things cyberpunk (and all other futuristic science fiction)
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“Your existence is a momentary lapse of reason.”

File: 1422796661199.jpg (21.86 KB,497x382,497:382,1236441_555203351243692_76….jpg)

 No.13082 [Last50 Posts]

We all know we're high tech here… but how low life are you, cyberpunks? Share some of your best motherfuckery and tales of the best worst shit you've done.
____________________________
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 No.13086

I've hacked my attendance record in high school to not flunk out in 2001.

sorry for not being punk enough…
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 No.13090

>>13086
You are forgiven.
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 No.13095

Used to shoplift weaboo materials at cons
To the cyberpolice out there this is not a confession
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 No.13098

Almost built a railgun in a barracks room out of a nerf gun.

Put the project on hold because I misjudged the capacitors and almost set the room on fire.

I'm not very low life.
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 No.13100

File: 1422803096970.jpg (57.08 KB,550x550,1:1,Jorge_Wants_To_Be_Hardcore.jpg)

>>13082
I stole a few Pokémon card packs when I was in highschool.
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 No.13104

I've downloaded some music from the internet
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 No.13105

>>13095
>shoplifting at cons
Really? Most of the people with stalls there are either small businesses or other enthusiasts.
Not cool.
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 No.13107

>>13105
>Not cool.
That's the point…
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 No.13130

Beyond stupid teenager hick-shit, like fucking around in barns and driving around inna fields, dicking around innawoods, throwing rocks at shit I shouldnt be throwin rocks at ive alsomade/set off nigger-tier explosives and napalm innawoods

then I realized that was kind of a bad idea. At some point I want to pick up one of those full retard super capacitors and build a railgun though
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 No.13132

When I was in high school I found out that my girlfriend was being molested by her dad, i doxxed him and found out that he was also a small-time hacker, his handle was geefive. I used that against him, and made an account on some forum posing as one of his friends, and chatted him up until I got an unintentional confession out of him that i later used in court against him.

Now he's living out of a van and I'm living with his daughter. His wife divorced him and married her lawyer. I honestly feel bad for him, I ruined his life, but I created something beautiful at the same time. That bitterschwayness is the most beautiful thing to me.

i quoted him saying
(geefive): i just had my daughter taken from me by some stupid kid and the police are all over me
(me): that's fucking terrible gee what's this kids deal
(geefive): I don't know, people, society, I'll blame anyone I can

;_;
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 No.13138

>>13132
Why isn't he in jail if he molested his daughter? Anyway, that was awesome, hardly what I would call "low life".
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 No.13140

File: 1422815812201.jpg (137.38 KB,645x720,43:48,1416555258672.jpg)

I regularly steal stuff from high class super markets, specifically dog food, cookies, chocolate and most of all expensive tea, but I don't consider that low life at all.

I was caught once, but I was an underage and we paid all that we stoled with my partner (About $30), so I didn't get in any kind of legal trouble. The most I've stolen is once with a friend when we stole about $300 in alcohol and food for us and some other friends.

>>13132
Don't worry, you're a hero.
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 No.13145

>>13138
The thing is, he'd given her acid when she was a little kid, and he'd been warping her perception of reality a lot. He'd groomed her to take responsibility for everything that was going on, thinking she wanted it, so she wouldn't speak out. But because of that she wasn't very grounded in reality.

She wasn't in any position to testify, he convinced the court that she was "mentally unstable" and her testimony was thrown out. We eventually settled the case with him agreeing to give up custody.

I say it's kind of a low life thing because I went out of my way to hurt another person. Even if he had set himself up for a fall, I was still the one who pushed him down, and that hacker I used to admire is homeless now. Sure, he's a scumbag who ogles kids, but it's all pretty fucked up if you look at it from his perspective.

>>13140
there are no heroes
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 No.13146

>>13138
No evidence, I already had sex by the time I got out of the house and there was no witnesses.
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 No.13147

>>13145
No, you went out of your way to help another person.
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 No.13164

>>13145
what a fucking awful thing to do to your offspring
assuming this story is completely true, he got exactly what he deserved
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 No.13168

>>13145
>pretty fucked up if you look at it from his perspective
Yes, it is. He drugged his own daughter, fucked her and told the girl it was her fault. THAT's fucked up.
But I think I kind of understand you feeling bad for him since you were the one that made him homeless.

But still… Maybe being homeless is even worse than being in jail.
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 No.13170

Haha, oh man. I'd love to throw up some stories here but the details of most of them would absolutely destroy my anonymity.

Let's just say I've coerced the boyfriend of a girl who sideswiped me into paying for a dent after she tried to do a hit and run while she was fucked up after a night on the town. I've also become friends with people and used them to get advantages from certain businesses and groups even though I thought they were absolutely useless as people.
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 No.13171

>>13170

I've also tipped off the police to drug dens in a few abandoned buildings so I could go urbex them, but I don't think that's awfully scummy.
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 No.13180

>>13082
Not terribly, except for shitty skiddie stuff back when I was in high school. I've always been above-board for IRL stuff, oddly enough, but I'm a bit obsessed with knowing HOW to do slightly illicit things, while usually never doing them.

On the internet level, I torrent shit like everyone else, and have dropped basic dox on a few people.

On the corporate level, I mostly like to have fun. Being the guy with the ID printer has led to good times. My workplace has unknowingly issued IDs for MD Geist, Gabe Newell, and a half dozen to me, with different art. Pic related is my favorite. I sometimes fuck with people, BOFH-style. I've snagged volume licensing for Windows and Office. When I worked at a shitty GeekSquad ripoff, I sorta-stole RAM, CPUs, and other useful components that we were supposed to recycle (laptop sports 12gb of RAM now, up from the factory 4). I dumpster dive frequently.

I expect in 20 years, once I start having midlife crises, I'll probably do some crazy shit.
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 No.13184

>>13180
>My workplace has unknowingly issued IDs for MD Geist, Gabe Newell, and a half dozen to me, with different art.
pic nigga
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 No.13185

Shoplifting from big stores.

>got caught

>cops get called
>told me i can go bu i will receive a letter telling me when to go to "be judged"
>shit never arrived

Haven't done it since though.

Other than that I'm a candy ass shazbot.
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 No.13225

File: 1422847060534.jpg (384.79 KB,1000x750,4:3,ineverasked.jpg)

>>13082
lets see
>all of my technology was found in dumpsters or purchased second hand
>router is DIYed from an old desktop, internet is served by a mess of cables barely managed with temporary wall hooks because i cant afford wireless
> been involved in multiple drug-fueled orgies ( we tested the drugs for impurites beforehand and wrapped our dicks, i try to be smart about being a dumbass)
> tried to steal shit from local recycling center- almost got mauled by the guard dog
> Roommate sells porn online to pay for his part of the rent,
>I'm desprately looking for work in heavy industry and currently surviving by sewing ridiculous costumes for people to wear at raves and selling my bodily fluids
Huh. Never thought much about it before now.
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 No.13248

File: 1422855217437.png (216.64 KB,410x357,410:357,He was alone in the city.PNG)

I used to wait outside the subway gate to the track for someone to open the emergency door (which people in a rush always opened) so I wouldn't pay the fee. I did the same with the buses if the back side door open and sneak through the people.

In High school we had metal detectors at the entrances since we had gangs that went there. There is also a no cellphone rule or any tech whatsoever allowed. During the fall/winter I would smuggle electronics in for people because of my thick coat and lazy rent-a-cops not saying shit to me.

Me and my friends use to shoplift at multiple stores for munchies, muzak CDs or vidya. The man was a artist at stealing, and made it look so easy. One moment we walk in a market and in a few minutes he says we have to leave. When I get only one or two things, this guy has 15 to 20 items.

Lastly, we use to write shit on the walls in random places with offensive shit just to see if some of it made it on the news as
>Swastikas outside of a business establishment owned by a Jewish couple.
>"This is terrible, my grandma passed a few months ago who was holocaust survivor and I walk in one day to see this"
>cries
or
>Japanese family shocked to see "How did radiation feel nips?"
>"This man is a coward!"
other times we would just break shit because "fuck these shazbots man"

I've only been arrested a few times and that was because drug possession and relying on my friends instinct rather than my own.



My friends and I were real bastards, everything slow down when we grew up. I sort of miss the stupidity we once reveled in.
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 No.13261

>>13082
>how low-life are you?
Anymore? not much. There's always history, though….


>collectively built a pipe bomb and made a random shmuck's outhouse disappear.

>firebombed civic monuments
>used to have a game I'd play with a friend. Rule: steal the least valuable, but most "interesting" object possible. Returns from this included anything from used construction equipment, plasic pieces from grocery packaging that's normally removed before it's stocked, a bar of soap and a tombstone.
>used to sell drugs; we maintained market advantage by giving away home-made chems (think: chloroform, etc) for free as a "bonus" with our normal products.
>wrecked a guy's myspace for hitting a dog with a tree branch. got the typical "you dun goofed" response from his parents; lol'd when his dad, an IT secfag for some corp, told us that he'd traced my IP to a specific friend's place. Wrecked the page from a different location.
>made a business of "recovering" passwords from phones and other mobile devices on a "no questions asked" basis.
>made a counter business of theft-proofing devices since people knew "someone" was unlocking stolen devices in the area.
>used Tor to circumvent filters and DL backtrack linux at the library…
>…stole my neighbour's internet with backtrack linux.
>SMS raep'd a friend's phone with 9001 iterations of "nigga y u laet?" for being 15 minutes late to a party – ruined the date he was ditching us for because his phone didn't shut up until over 45 minutes later…when he'd finally given up and come to join/yell at us.
>used telnet to access restricted sites in highschool
>used to play the game of "trip on LSD and go urbexing at 3AM"
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 No.13266

>>13132
Good job anon. You did good.
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 No.13269

>>13132

Don't feel bad. You did the right thing, protecting your girl.

He does not deserve your pity. He only deserves pain and death. God willing.
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 No.13271

i got a high school (that some skid who pissed me off goes to) evacuated last year back in October (i could link the article and news story if any anon wants to read it)
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 No.13272

>>13271
Yeah. it'll be great. What mass hysteria did you make him suffer?
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 No.13285

File: 1422873146623.jpg (11.54 KB,246x200,123:100,evil_mastermind_by_largest….jpg)

>>13261
>made a business of "recovering" passwords from phones and other mobile devices on a "no questions asked" basis.
>made a counter business of theft-proofing devices since people knew "someone" was unlocking stolen devices in the area.

exquisite.
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 No.13319

You guys are a bunch of shazbots
>so yeah, i'm so badass, i stole candy when i was younger
>i was even worse, i fucking stole someones passwords !!!1!!!111!
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 No.13323

File: 1422900602719-0.jpg (109.62 KB,550x458,275:229,id.jpg)

File: 1422900602719-1.jpg (398.37 KB,887x1141,887:1141,IDs3.jpg)

>>13184
>I want pics of your fake IDs

That's a dangerous game, user.

Yes, the censoring was necessary - most people from that workplace could probably still recognize it, too. The MD Geist ID number is censored because I kept the number and the barcode as my actual ID, so I could still use it.

I forgot the pic on the original post, so that's attached as well. Not only is that on my main ID card, but I also dropped that into the system so that whenever my card is scanned, that's what comes up as the photo.

>>13319
Are you that angry SJW that's been whining in other threads, or just some boring shazbot that has never done anything against the rules because you're too scared to?
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 No.13331

File: 1422901476447.png (356.46 KB,1366x768,683:384,hak3.png)

>>13323
I used to do a lot of skiddy shit when I was younger.
>tfw only behind 6 proxies
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 No.13373

I once sent an anonymous email to a teacher I disliked telling him how much he sucked. He made a 10 minute speech the next day about it, apparently he was deeply offended.

I also bought LSD from the internets
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 No.13377

>>13261
>>SMS raep'd a friend's phone with 9001 iterations of "nigga y u laet?" for being 15 minutes late to a party – ruined the date he was ditching us for because his phone didn't shut up until over 45 minutes later…when he'd finally given up and come to join/yell at us.
couldn't he, like, take the battery out of the phone? Or did he have one of those new-fangled ones with non-replaceable battery because of USABILITY STUDIES
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 No.13378

File: 1422909688298.jpg (57.3 KB,960x720,4:3,1390523936131.jpg)

Welp, this would be a crime depending on ones viewpoint.

I'm a weird guy that in my spare time uses services like craigslist, freecycle, and even drewslist to acquire computer stuff from one place, fix what I can, and then give, mail, or sell it to other shazbots.
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 No.13382

>>13378
Where's crime in that? You're basically selling your time (spent on looking for things) and knowledge (most people don't know how to fix stuff).

The only crime can be that you probably don't pay taxes, but I don't think you're earning enough on it to even need to do so.
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 No.13471

File: 1422942052658.jpg (54.79 KB,668x661,668:661,1368425977046.jpg)

I was a pretty serious graffiti artist for a while. I also stole shit all the time.
techno wise, basic pirating with audio software ($1000+), operating systems, actual music and tv shows. I also did some basic funny shit with the computers at school, like planting fake viruses in the administrative files via linux live boot.
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 No.13483

File: 1422947785543.jpg (64.5 KB,600x600,1:1,image.jpg)

Wow you're such a badass (NOT)
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 No.13489

File: 1422952340807.png (18.37 KB,498x520,249:260,1419358626873.png)

DDoS'd for a few bil on RuneScape.
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 No.13537

I created KotakuPastebin to piss Kotaku off, and ended up getting a direct message from Stephen Totilo
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 No.13544

>>13471
>graffiti artist
Can you share some pictures of your work (remember to remove EXIF)?
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 No.13584

>>13225
> picture
Top fucking kеk m8.
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 No.13586

>>13537
Link? Would you share the message? I love seeing Kotaku get bumblasted.
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 No.13598

>imagine all these jay and silent bob antics taking place
>be a shazbot millenial who did nothing but stay at home and play video games throughout his youth
>make shitty blog post on /cyber/
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 No.14129

When I was around 16 and edgy I always went to tough bars and other places at night. However I got my face smashed a few times when I got seperated from my friends on the way home. So ninja movies and dbz inspired me to make an escape flash. Instead of fucking around with pocket sand I made a device from camera parts with 3 flashes. It was bulky, but fit in my hoodie pocket and once saved my ass. It took a few seconds to charge and if you get flashed in the face in the dark, you wont' see shit for some time. Gives enough time to run away.
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 No.14130

>>14129
I like this idea.
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 No.14139

>>13323
nigga that's golden
>gabe newell #69
;^)
Was that purely random or did you plan that?





>>14129
Are you an asian kid who liked watching Goonies?
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 No.14146

File: 1423270371602.gif (135.9 KB,161x137,161:137,1390259303650.gif)

>>13331
>mfw only 5 proxies
feels bad man
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 No.14167

File: 1423285782738.jpg (77.37 KB,600x791,600:791,Grinman.jpg)

>>14139
Oh, I did that on purpose. The barcode reads 69, as well - it's generated from the ID code.

I don't have any pictures of it, but I also printed a Richard C. Mongler ID for one of my friends, who used to be a /b/tard back in the day. I can't remember if I did 000069 for that as well, or if I used his actual ID number so he could swipe it.
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 No.14168

File: 1423286269235.png (1.31 MB,736x922,368:461,comeatme.png)

Not very high tech, but pretty low life.

>private school for high school

>student council all 4 years
>vice president all 4 years
>4 year tenure treasurer is bro
>Routinely encourage the council and President (I served under 3 different ones) to plan extravagant dances, rallies, activities, etc.
>Offer to relieve them of all the burden of actually planning this, essentially whittle their jobs down to discussing wishlists and letting me make it happen
>come back with absurd price quotes
>tone them down only slightly
>Treasurer bro assured them brouzouf was always there for their extravagant shit
>We'd find every way possible to cut corners on EVERYTHING
Call in favors owed by AV club guys for DJing dances, scour the city for catering companies with mis-orders and surpluses, etc.
>Checks to providers always made out to cash
>we cashed them
>paid providers in cash
>we took the difference (which began to add up)
>Senior year and graduation roll around
>Praised by teachers and student council for being a quiet, effective Vice President who always had his President's back - faithfully serving 3 "administrations"
>Treasurer bro is similarly lauded
>nobody realizes we embezzled around $6-7,000 each over the years

So college comes around
>Join fraternity
>obtain non-elected executive council position
>still can propose legislation
>Charter amendment passes, it now requires a majority vote of our alumni board to dislodge me
>Almost all important committee heads, executive committee are also on my committee
>hold my meetings before Chapter meetings
>my committee sets the tone for all chapter meetings for 3 years, including controlled opposition
>IFC (inter-fraternity council) shit gets rolling, I have to attend regular meetings with my counterparts from other fraternities
>Eventually become meetings of my position and president of every fraternity for all IFC meetings
>student government elections come
>herewegoagain.jpg
>start accumulating favors owed by other fraternities
>establish council for risk management with Pan-Hel (sororities)
>they start to owe us some
>reach out to our student government candidates asking for favors in return for things like securing votes and helping their odds
>get independent (non-fraternity or sorority) friends to run as spoiler candidates
>start banging student paper junior editor
>she starts colluding in suppressing certain stories, building narrative as we want it
>Sophomore Year rolls around
>my people win elections, finally
>scramble to keep coalition together, ensure our candidates (now office-holders) play ball
>start doling out favors, resolving issues
>Senior year
>I run a goddamn "political machine" for a major-ish Midwestern university's fraternity, sorority, and student government systems
>no embezzlement but plenty of media manipulation, intimidation, misappropriation of university and student government funds, lots of antics covered up or brushed aside thanks to pulling the right strings

And that's how I learned about politics! Thanks to my thorough and extensive education in the political processes in a constitutional democracy, I now have no respect whatsoever for actual IRL politicians.
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 No.14169

>>14168
>posted by a future president of the US
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 No.14170

>>14168
Wait, so your Student Council actually let you handle the cash?
Jesus Christ, they put too much faith into you guys.
I was VP was mine and just sat on my ask making sarcastic remarks all of the time.
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 No.14173

File: 1423290008057.jpg (133.72 KB,563x900,563:900,power armor painting3.jpg)

>>14169
Oh no, I should have made that clearer. I never ran for or held any elected office in college. Senior year, I was still just a lowly Risk Management chairman for a mid-sized fraternity.

Doesn't mean that I didn't get the final say in things like
>Who will the big speaker be this year?
>What concerts should we schedule?
>What houses have priority for renovation grants?
>Who gets the coveted campus locations for their events (social, charity, whatever)

Sad thing was the goal wasn't brouzouf or even really power, I just wanted to make certain my fraternity got everything it wanted. Renovation grant- DONE, the entire university golf course reserved for our charity event with only one week notice - DONE, the unfortunate antisemetic incident - never got beyond worth of mouth rumor nobody believed… that kind of nonsense.

I enjoyed playing "Godfather", don't get me wrong, but the ultimate motive was keeping my people strong and insulated from harm. They put their faith in me to manage their risk, insurance, etc. and things kinda snowballed into a full blown political machine.

I'm technically head of three departments at work and even my bosses aren't sure what my title is. OH GOD! IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN!

But no, I don't go on rampages looking for power or authority. I just tend to take a leading role and before I realize, everyone's asking me what they're supposed to do and I'm somehow de-facto in charge of whatever the hell I've been doing.

Take care of your "tribe", your people and do everything in your power (including seizing power so there's more you can do!) and things will magically fall into place. Seems to work for me!
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 No.14209

File: 1423349244970.gif (1.94 MB,704x384,11:6,tumblr_ni51hnuRjj1shhkvwo1….gif)

>>13082
Used to go out at night with friends and set off Molotov's, napalm, and fireworks. We tried to make thermite too using rust powder and iron filings with magnesium as the ignition source, but we were in our early high school years so that failed miserably. Cant do much of that now since I'm out of high school.
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 No.14213

>>13100
I convinced an autistic kid to trade me his gold YuGiOh "Egyptian God Card" for a fake exodia set I made with a printer and glossy paper.

Told that aspie it was legit.

I think it was actually worth a good bit when yugioh was a big deal.
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 No.14345

>>13261
>made a business of "recovering" passwords from phones and other mobile devices on a "no questions asked" basis.
>made a counter business of theft-proofing devices since people knew "someone" was unlocking stolen devices in the area.

If you aren't making shit up, kindly elaborate. I'm curious.
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 No.14353

>>14213
I met a couple guys who did that. Dem gullible kids man
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 No.14397

I've smuggled weapons wearing a ski mask, trench coat, and brandishing Mark 23. I also only eat strawberries, chicken burgers, and milk.
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 No.14404

>>14397
> I also only eat strawberries, chicken burgers, and milk.
hard…core?
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 No.14427

File: 1423471913279.jpg (367.37 KB,1736x2500,434:625,SRO_CHAR_Elf_prev_2.jpg)

>>14404
Maybe he's an elf
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 No.14453

File: 1423496142684.gif (49.45 KB,96x92,24:23,regularsnoop_63323.gif)

I just ended a contract for this healthcare brokerage startup. While my job was to help build a CMS, most of what I did there was creating mass scale scraper bots to collect hundreds of thousands of individual plan quotes into a giant database for their quoting engine.

I hit them all with a hybrid form of scraping I invented using Greasemonkey's GM_XMLHTTPREQUEST and a php file to keep track of stuff/handle DB shit.

Humana
Assurant
Coventry
United Healtchare
Cigna
Aetna

Even some smaller quote sites like

Quotit
HealthSherpa
ValuePenguin
etc


>mfw I got paid to basically dump databases over port 80.
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 No.14459

in middle school id always fuck with school PC's, the day i discovered that they had a opensuse network boot set up for imaging computers, hilarity ensued. for a fucking middle school they had a lot of weird stuff going on in their network.

in high school first thing i did was checked for the same shit, wasn't exactly the same, after my freshman year they changed a bunch of stuff. started fucking around and gave my user account admin privileges across the entire network. i got fucked over right after that by school admins, but i think an IT staff member set me up because they were accusing me of stupid shit that id never even done. i also used to get rid of passwords on phones and ipods for cash way more often that i expected to, actually got accused of being some "ringleader" that goes around and steals peoples shit although i never fucking did. i also used to sell drugs in high school and was constantly on massive amounts of pills like a retard.

i go to a community college now for cyber sec and constantly dicking around in their stuff, kinda sketchy though cause most of my teachers have worked for/work for the military/bureau/agency and give me funny looks often which kinda sketches me out. i secretly hope one of them will notice me and offer me something cool to do, thatd be awesome, but will prob never happen cause i look like some kind of dirty burnout most likely.

when im bored i sit in mcdonalds parking lots and watch CC info etc go through their network and sometimes just screw stuff up, i used to do the same in the mall but im too paranoid for that now. ive never really stolen any or even saved info, i just like seeing that i can. a buddy of mine used to own a gas station and had a neat little way of making physical copies of customers cards, pretty fucked up, lets just say i had nothing to do with that.

and i make small EMPs and weird contraptions i may or may not use to fuck shit up in public places, and also physical devices to "hack" stuff, i feel like a retard saying that. im constantly afraid im gonna have my hand in my pocket one day, flip a switch, and end up electrocuting myself and looking like a retard cause my soldering is always pretty ugly. thats about it i guess.
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 No.14487

>>14404
Indeed he is. Very few people are as badass.
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 No.14515

Nothing but drugs and urban/cyber exploration for me
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 No.14516

>>13331
>not having how to screenshot and gayporn tabs open
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 No.14544

At one point of my life, I was renting a room in a share-apartment in Central St Petersburg (Russia, not Florida), working for an international carder gang over the internet. I quit as soon as I realized what they were really up to.

I also used to deal drugs to my friends and their friends, I guess. I'm not very lowlife.
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 No.14561

I steal computers from recycling bins and rip any data they've got left on them to peruse at my leisure because of my voyeuristic tendencies
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 No.15977

>>14515
cyber exploration…?
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 No.15988

>>14516
i'm sorry, was that humorous?
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 No.16300

There are more cellphones, in the country where I live, than toilets.
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 No.16305

>>16300
Good, now stay in India and stop trying to take my job, currynig.
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 No.16331

>>16305
what is your job and why can a robot not supersede you?
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 No.16335

>>13171
yeah, you are just a pussy
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 No.16337

File: 1424546974668.jpg (218.65 KB,1280x960,4:3,1423620114473.jpg)

>>13248
>real bastards
>posting about using the subway without buying a ticket, bringing cellphones inside the school, shoplifting and painting swastikas on the walls as examples of low life.

Is this board just a 10/10 troll?
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 No.16338

>>14353
>>14213

taking advantage of someone is not something you should be boasting about
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 No.16340

File: 1424547396451.jpg (434.65 KB,1000x1400,5:7,inverted___strawberry_choc….jpg)

>>16337
yeah, being cruel isn't lowlife - it's the opposite
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 No.16342

>bragging about torrenting shit
>scamming autistic fucks
>tipping off cops
>having played motherfucking yugioh
>bragging about taking the subways without a ticket

niggas that's not lowlife, it's called being a pathetic shazbot
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 No.16384

>>13331
what proxies do you use?
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 No.16410

>>13107
No, the point is resisting megacorps, not being a general dick to your fellows. Especially if they're one of your own. How many /cyber/ novels have you read where the main character is just a dick fucking people over for no reason?

When I think lowlife, I think drugs for some reason. In that regard, I was once a very low life indeed. Also being generally dirty. I've done a lot of that. Is dumpstering considered low life? I've eaten a bunch of lowlife meals. Shoplifting from modern day megacorps? Ayup. Living on the dole? Ayup.
Not so much anymore, thankfully. I'm definitely less of a low life at this stage. Being a lowlife is romantic, but I'm not a main character in a book.
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 No.16466

>>16410
Fuck you. Screwing over the little guy is way better than fucking with a megacorp, because then the damage is real.
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 No.16467

File: 1424658333014.jpg (194.24 KB,1024x1365,1024:1365,uncool_chan__version_2_by_….jpg)

>>16466
senseless violence is not cool
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 No.16469

>>16467
You're right. It's awesome.
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 No.16470

File: 1424659895667.jpg (67.17 KB,1600x843,1600:843,41st century 02.jpg)

>>16469
>>16467
no it's uncool: bad, useless, incompatible with desired goals
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 No.16473

>>16466
>>16469
kid, did your father beat you or something?
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 No.16487

I sold adderall and xanax all through highschool
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 No.16535

>>14544
>there's a St. Petersburg, Florida.

God damn Americans and naming their shit after other places.
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 No.16604

>>16535
haha we got so much of that shit up here in maine. china, poland, norway, paris, denmark, list goes on and on
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 No.17401

>>13082
I have a criminal record charge for Assault with a Deadly Weapon.
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 No.17412

back in high school i used to fake my parents signatures whenever they were needed for some non important messages and grade bulletins.

Wrote simple RAM clogging .bat viruses to drop em in the computers lab and installed CS 1.6 to play with friends.

Also i used to be a Sharpie tattoo artist and charged about 2 to 5 dollars per drawing and an aditional buck for redrawing cause friends parents made them wash that shit.

Made several cheat sheets encrypted in several languages and taught some friends to decode them and use them in exams. Also played some crypto treasure hunt with said friends.

Actually used 3 1/2 Diskettes to store essays and digital homework.

Befriended my Physics professor so he could supply me some copper for a coilgun project i had. I made a 20 inches long 3 stages coilgun and showed it to him and he passed me that year, the guy was pretty schway.

And finally in the last year of high school i got into a stupid argument with my Religion professor (was a shitty catholic school) about transhumanism and how we could be more than gods, hopefully it wasnt a graded class otherwise the fucker would have flunked me.
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 No.17414

>>17412
Very nice anon. Any pics on the coil gun?
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 No.17429

>>14168
The most cyb post on this board.
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 No.17444

File: 1425389840427.gif (759.04 KB,160x160,1:1,FIh4Tc0.gif)

This must be some nsa's trick to get me confess that I grew weed when I was 16 and stole army equipment when I was in service.

Oh shit they are h
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 No.17453

>Technique #4 - 'INFORMATION COLLECTION'

>Information collection is also a very effective method to determine the psychological level of the forum members, and to gather intelligence that can be used against them. In this technique in a light and positive environment a 'show you mine so me yours' posting is initiated. From the number of replies and the answers that are provided much statistical information can be gathered. An example is to post your 'favourite weapon' and then encourage other members of the forum to showcase what they have. In this matter it can be determined by reverse proration what percentage of the forum community owns a firearm, and or a illegal weapon. This same method can be used by posing as one of the form members and posting your favourite 'technique of operation.' From the replies various methods that the group utilizes can be studied and effective methods developed to stop them from their activities.


http://cryptome.org/2012/07/gent-forum-spies.htm
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 No.17461

>>17444
>stole army equipment
please tell me it was something interesting, not just a warming layer or something

although those waffletops are sweeeeet
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 No.17466

>>16384
I get big lists from a few different places, then run them through a python script to see which ones are still online.
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 No.17471

>>17461
Shoes, gloves, towels and 40 kilos of mre. Anything interesting was too risky or if I would get caught I would have faced jail, military court or my whole company would have been shut down for security preach. Usually I just stole simple stuff people left unattended. I wish I would have rummaged trough trash tough. There were shittons of tech from 90's and 80's.

Also what the hell is waffletop?
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 No.17472

>>17471
I have to point out that I did not serve in the US and no; I will not tell where I served or my rank. I was a low rank fucktard who only did shitty logistics work.
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 No.17477

>>17471
technically called a grid fleece

it's the warmest, coziest motherfucker there is

it's the one with the high collar and the thumbholes to pull the sleeves up under your gloves or over your knuckles

it's like not even getting out of bed
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 No.17478

>>17477
Oh damn I know! Those things were cosy as fuck. I wish I had stolen one.
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 No.17500

Very little crime, beyond the usual piracy, of which my entire generation is guilty. I'm usually polite to people, and the worst I've ever done probably involves my porn collection (no CP here though, NSA).
>>13598
Yeah, I'm this guy.
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 No.17501

>>15977
Probably exploring old MMO game worlds (Worlds, Second Life, etc.) and abandoned websites.
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 No.17530

File: 1425441151612.gif (468.56 KB,480x228,40:19,1405890449975.gif)

>>13261
>>SMS raep'd a friend's phone with 9001 iterations of "nigga y u laet?" for being 15 minutes late to a party – ruined the date he was ditching us for because his phone didn't shut up until over 45 minutes later…when he'd finally given up and come to join/yell at us.
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 No.17531

File: 1425442687590.jpg (29 KB,1000x159,1000:159,Living_the_dream2.jpg)

you guys are making me all painfully aware what a boring shazbot i am.
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 No.17534

>>13168
It's not.
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 No.17592

>>14129
I wanna know how you did it. Seriously, put some schematics up somewhere.
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 No.17604

>>17592
Not him, but all you need to do is strip down a disposable camera to nothing but the flash and use that. Better yet, an actual old-school camera flash, shit can be bright as fuck. Amp up the batteries and you're golden.

You can also remove the bulb, attach pointed leads, and you've got a pretty brutal tazer. One of my friends managed to accidentally weld a pair of tweezers together when fucking with a large flash.
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 No.17880

>>17531
you're not that bad most days I don't leave my bed
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 No.18065

>>14459
>and i made small EMPs
never fire that shit in public, you might kill someone with a pacemaker and get arrested for murder
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 No.18249

during my 2edgy4u phase I:
>helped smear a catholic altar with glyphs painted in pig's blood
>framed a guy who had much worse coming for it
>got him run out of town
>wormed my way into otherkin communities to chronicle and mock them
>ripped off an entire street light
>ripped off portions of high-end security systems
>distracted a guy so he'd get hit by a car
nobody suspected me of any of it, to this day everyone thinks I'm an upstanding polite young person from a good christian home.

of course, if there are any feds reading this, none of this is in any way true.
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 No.18287

>>18065
that'd be manslaughter brah
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 No.18377

>>18249
>low empathy antisocial behaviour
welp, seems like you had psychopathic teenage outbreaks
>>distracted a guy so he'd get hit by a car
omg, I always wanted to do this but never had the chance
just for curiosity, is it as satisfactory as I imagined it as being?
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 No.18582

I can't acknowledge or deny doing anything low-life related. Speaking of low-lifes, the worst of them are whitehat shazbots.
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 No.18595

>>18377
yes and no, I'm not close with my family, but I don't like shazbots punching my siblings in the mouth infront of me.

watching someone ragdoll however is pretty disturbing in person
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 No.18598

>>18595
Well of course it is, you fucking knobhead.
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 No.18618

>>18595
>watching someone ragdoll however is pretty disturbing in person
you're no fun
:[
everything can be at least a little bit of fun if you put your mind to it.
Just because it is a close family member it doesn't mean anything,
they probably don't remember it and they got out of it with just few bones crushed.
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 No.18638

>>18598
yeah, but tugging on muscles of corpses is great fun, flipping off people using a dead man's hand is just a little funny.

>>18618
I don't expect him to remember it chummer, I'm not here to teach people life lessons, I was just annoyed with the shazbot
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 No.18641

>>18638
>>18618
>>18595
>>18377
>>18249
Is this the lowlife thread, or the 3edgy5u thread?
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 No.18642

>>18641
why not both chummer?
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 No.18661

I pirate movies, reupload them, and then print QR codes with the link for people to find. Don't know if anyone's actually used them though.

I also have a regular system for shoplifting, which I use to get the painkillers I'm addicted to for free.
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 No.18678

>>14173
man i want to grow up to be like you

thanks for being a role model mr bateman.
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 No.18681

i study hard in school and attend lots of clubs.
i got scolded by a teacher once for using bad language.
ive never done any drugs. man im the antithesis of low life.

>>17453
ahh fucking spooky
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 No.18682

I once stole a plant from an office in highschool. Also set some paper (and a friend) on fire and got suspended for a week. Also drank in school, got caught once and suspended.
Got suspended in junior kindergarten for learning how to read, and reading some graffiti on school property that said `fuck`, then saying it outloud.
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 No.18683

>>18682
Oh, forgot to mention I got suspended for 3~ days at a time almost every month throughout elementary school for questioning teachers. Thanks, fucking catholic school.
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 No.18685

>>18661
Describe said technique user
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 No.18728

>>18683
>>18682
Let me guess, brazil?
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 No.18781

In high school we were given school laptops that we could take home but these laptops haf monitoring software were the school could see everything you did and if you were at school they could monitor your screen. So obviously i went to utorrent and downloaded the uninstaller and teachers version of the software and charged a couple brouzouf to people uninstall the software and install the teacher version. once enough students had it we turned it on the teachers and used to delete important shit off of their computers, chaos ensued and we had free reign of the network I also used it to fuck up an enemy of mines laptop. Boy did I get in shit for that stuff but it was worth it.
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 No.18787

>>18728
No, USA.
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 No.18837

I stole that LAN box thingy that you use for LAN parties the other day at high school and gave it a friend. I could have used it but whatever. Also when I was working in a drug store I was hanging out in the warehouse all the time eating that fruit sugar-glucose type of schway and looking at old tech. Dude had a Commodore64 and a few dozens of floppy disks(which I didn't steal, unfortunaletly)
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 No.18877

>>13132
kind've jackass but i guess 'your ind/idea was trying to do right' or whatever that quote is
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 No.18878

>>13132
I have a boner now.
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 No.18879

>>14168
remember that /pol/ thread where one guy (class, really) simulated a student goverment for a few weeks. Some legislative student program, so he was able to become dictator in effect? As in he took peoples' food, toiletries, etc? And got most people to obey him and lock up those who spoke out against him? To be fair, though the governor at the end refused to budge and the governor was able to still somewhat resist his influence.

it was one of the 'why we need amendment 2' things. Also, you literally are the tvtropes 'absurdly powerful student countil' trope, AND you went to private school. lol.

>>14173
Remember Stalin ended up as like the secretary checking on who voted for x (All-mighty janitor!)
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 No.18986

Been keeping an eye on this thread. Moves pretty slow so I may as well contribute

Make a pretty schway living getting temp jobs with telemarketing agencies, working one or two days til I have access to their data lists, then rip the lists and sell them on to other agencies.

Heading to a spot now to connect to their wlan and pull a database of 5k leads or so I can s3ll for $1 per lead in the SMEE space

Feels cool man
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 No.18993

>>18986
To add to this:

I feel like we're living in a time where data such as I move is beginning to be worth real brouzouf on the small to medium enterprise level, but orgs with >50 staff are not educated on data security.

I wish I knew a thing or two about cracking networks, it would save me so much time on the RL side of things in terms of accessing databases. For example, there's a large lead generation company in my city that pretty much deals in large data lists worth upwards of 20k 1st world dollars, and if somebody had the ability to connect to the wifi they'd be able to just fucking jump in an pull hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of data in fucking spreadsheets.

I'll give another example- worked for a client who asked me to wash some data lists for a crappy hourly wage. Guy was from another state, and had written an app that accessed his database for me to work from. As soon as he sent the app I passed it on to a more technically minded buddy who did whatever black magic and used the credentials provided to scrape the database

then proceeded to move a few score leads from that database for $500 a pop to another org in another state in an afternoon after a few phone calls, all on the legit, legal level.

why can I not into cracking wifi srsly
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 No.19601

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 No.19640

>>13331
>having facebook open, claiming you're secure because muh proxies
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 No.19648

>>13261
Ok, but, how does one go about stealing a tombstone.
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 No.19731

>>18661
Shoplifting addictive painkillers, otc codeine?
I hate that the stuff isn't otc over here..
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 No.19741

this one time i took a half-full beer at a bar. i had 0 brouzouf so i wished someone had left it, turns out they'd just gone to the bathroom. i gulped it before the dude came out and left, but the bartender came running after me, livid. he was two seconds away from beating me to pulp, but he calmed down when i gave him a gift card as payment. the card still had around $7 on it, so all in all i paid for a half-pint with an unrelated store's gift card.
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 No.19757

>>17466
>not posting link to pastebin for said script
Help some niggas out
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 No.19758

>>13098
gonna need some blueprints there chummer
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 No.19823

I dunno if this is particularly low life, but I was a pretty antisocial teenager.

When I was 16, some private school kid – a friend of a friend – paid me to mess with a guy he knew. We will call him B. I stole B's hotmail and facebook accounts, found a bunch of embarrassing secrets he had hidden away, then started trolling B and his friends over MSN messenger. I found out that one of said friends claimed his uncle was some kind of security specialist who could fix this and find out who did it.

> You're what, 23, 25? You seem really bright, you should be doing something productive, not fucking with a teenager's life.

> Yeah, you're right. I don't feel good about this.
> So why are you doing it?
> I was paid to.
> Who paid you?
> I don't know if I should say.
> Come on, man. B doesn't deserve this.
> Okay, yeah, he doesn't. I don't feel right naming names, but one of your close friends got me to break into B's stuff so that he could get it back and look like a hero. That's all I'm saying. I'm done. Your friend can have his accounts back.
> No, come on, which one? Is he in the group chat?
> He might be.

Apparently between that and the dirty laundry I aired the drama really escalated. I feel bad about it now, but the shekels were great at the time.

I also used to sneak out at night to draw graffiti and stuff. When I was a cringy /b/tard, I wheatpasted a pretty large cartoon longcat along the side of a building. Never got caught for all the bullshit I did, but somewhere between age 17 and 18 I decided to leave it behind.
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 No.20140

File: 1428549845964.jpg (53.5 KB,1366x768,683:384,1421608522958.jpg)

Stole a bunch of chemlab shit in highschool and once turned an erlenmeyer flask into a vape to smoke pot with. That was fucking sketchy. Set dumpster fires and shoplifted a bunch. Cracked a couple wi-fi passwords when I would visit grandparents because they didn't have internet. Then there's your typical piracy and what have you.

I was a good student at school, but I was a piece of shit outside it. I've calmed down since then though.


If the feds or anyone else are reading this, I made everything up except for the good student part.
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 No.20157

>>13323

>just some boring shazbot that has never done anything against the rules because you're too scared to


Not the angry whining SJW, but this is me in a nutshell. I just read the experiences that have been posted and live vicariously through them, I guess.
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 No.23496

I was in Greece mid 2013 for my high school senior trip. We were in Athens, my friend and I were given free roam of a giant flea market that was already giving me some good vibes, when my friend and I walked into the center square,

There was a huge anarchist rally for a guy named Kostas Sakkas, who was detained without evidence for years now (He was on a hunger strike for about a week, but there were rumors he was being force-fed).

I didn’t know what was going on, but a girl with a pink top, black cargo pants, and leaflets (schway) came up to me, we started talking about what was going on, and she started explaining the background, like the economy, education slashes, youth unemployment, etc.

So I ask my friend to look up the guy, and there were absolutely no results on Google.

So, any searching for the guy was being blocked, I believe by the government, so I tell her how to use TOR (which was a big deal at the time). While I was wrapping up the basic setup, she asked me if I wanted to march with them, which I eagerly said yes, dragging my buddy into it.

So, we go about 2-3 blocks towards the capital, and we see riot police blocking, rounding up protesters, and dispersing them. My buddy noped out, and I followed him after telling the girl I had to go.

I looked up what happened that day, and supposedly there was a clash/ riot later that day.

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 No.23499

>>18287

Still isn't optimal :[

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 No.23503

>>13082

Oh is there a lot to go on

-When I was little I nearly stole jewellery because muh corps at that age (still do)

-my friend and I used to hang out at 12-1am and go to parking lots and use clotheshanger and just scrape every car to oblivion

-in my area I set trees on fire near houses and the fire trucks had to come, ironically there was a massive fire the next day by another group of arsonists and they were charged with the one I set (news said they were charged for one in X area and my area "the night before")

And last but not least:

-I've set things in motion all these years in that I become entirely underground and then have my brother abducted and killed by my colleagues for raping me when I was 8.

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 No.23831

File: 1432890333366.png (484.63 KB,1322x2891,1322:2891,1421663719423.png)

>>18879

Right here m8

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 No.23839

>>13537

Lol holy shit link

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 No.23842

>>13537

/cyber/ and 8ch are once again based as fuck.

Share the message, ya digital dingus.

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 No.23844

Once as a kid, me and a friend were literally playing with fire on a place filled with lots of dried grass, as the stupid kids we were, and inevitably set fire to that place. Because we were also cowards, we ran away, and later came back to that place. Luckily the locals managed to call the firefighters.

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 No.23845

>>23831

Fucking Stanford Prison Experiment all over again, that's great.

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 No.23853

>>23831

wow, that is one impressive story.

there is a german movie called "the wave" that is similar. i haven't seen it yet but it's supposed to be good and also based on a real story iirc.

reminds me of clan politics in online gaming.

and it's funny how it's always /pol/tards who abuse the system and create their own little fascist dictatorship, even when they don't even like fascist dictatorships. must be in their genes lol.

using that story to justify the 2nd amendment is obviously stupid as fuck and only a deluded /pol/tard could come up with such a retarded conclusion but it's a good story.

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 No.23855

>>23853

>there is a german movie called "the wave" that is similar. i haven't seen it yet but it's supposed to be good and also based on a real story iirc.

I haven't seen the movie, but I'd recommend the book, it's pretty short, but still carries a lot of emotional weight. It's pretty similar, except the idea that the government corrupts into fascism is the point the teacher was trying to get across the whole time, it just gets way out of hand by the end.

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 No.23862

>>23855

>>23853

The movie is pretty meh, i saw it with my class years ago, the most interesting thing was the salute, we did it for a week after watching the movie.

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 No.23948

File: 1433034414437.jpg (792.49 KB,883x1076,883:1076,.jpg)

>>13098

My waifu did this at Uni. She stopped when she realized how much it would suck if she couldn't properly control the trajectory of the ammunition and the timing of the capacitor firing sequence. Was using a "copper rail" design at the time.

tl;dr My waifu was barking up the wrong tree with that design.

In a "classic" railgun design capacitor discharge timing is critically important to the trajectory for fired ammo.

These days my waifu would say fuck rails entirely, they significantly increase friction and therefore limit the ammunition in many ways.

If my waifu used an electro-magnetically charged barrel and chamber to suspend the ammunition and then used an extremely high voltage reaction to discharge the ammunition, it would be far more effective.

This gives you a lot more flexibility in terms of what kind of payload you want to deliver. Metallic liquid type ammunition isn't out of the question. This is probably the key to making effective railguns.

What really matters in an effective weapon is penetration, and the faster you can accelerate a group of particles, the better your penetration power is.

Imagine how tightly you could pack a group of liquid particles with an electromagnetic compression chamber, then imagine using a huge oppositional charge applied to that compressed liquid metal, forcing it metal out of the barrel at an extreme velocity.

Imagine the pinpoint accuracy you could achieve. Lower mass+much improved aerodynamic properties.

This could be used to disable physical targets from a much longer distance.

Designing and testing something like that would be a fun job.

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 No.23987

>>23948

liquid ammunition would be very space-efficient

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 No.24009

>>19823

>When I was a cringy /b/tard, I wheatpasted a pretty large cartoon longcat along the side of a building.

Hold on, just how long are we talkin?

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 No.24012

File: 1433095004689.jpg (31.31 KB,184x184,1:1,1419811946136.jpg)

>>23496

That's pretty schway, anon.

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 No.24015

>>14345

Wow, this thread still exists. Ok, I'll elaborate.

I did this on a job corps facility where theft of small electronics is common. I was in the A+ course and was well known for being "good at it", so shady people would come to me with phones and old generation iPods they'd "accidentally locked" for me to open.

Dumb phones were pretty simple: often, there was a factory reset code one can enter into the device that wipes storage, including passwords. Additionally, there's often an "unlock" code that allows dumbphones to interface with carrier SIMs they're not normally allowed to interface with. Doing this makes the device easier to resell, so my typical procedure was to wipe the passwords with an unlock code, and then "unlock" it so that the nigger who brought it to me could resell it.

pre-iOS iPods were a bit easier (with phones, you have to know the model specific codes): there's a password file in the filesystem somewhere (can't remember where exactly – I was doing this shit back in 2008-2009ish) that, when deleted, unlocks the device.

Both of these procedures were paid with either $10 or a bag of weed.

Protecting devices was more in-depth and case-by-case given the nature of security. Most of the time, it was a matter of putting an autoruns + batchfile on flashdrives/mp3 devices that would delete windows system files if the device's owner didn't enter a password.

I never actually unlocked my own customer's stolen devices…that's fucked up ethically. Rather, my threat model was against inner city niggers who wouldn't know how to unlock an open door. The idea was to lock a device such that the item would be dumped in a public place after fucking up tyrone's laptop. This often led to the item being found and recovered by the owner.

>>19648

Not hard. The tombstone was in an isolated graveyard in a rural region. No security whatsoever, so it was literally a matter of getting drunk, rolling out there, knocking the fucker over, teamlifting it into the backseat and driving off.

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 No.24052

>lived in hong kong

>got in a violent feud with this bar owner and doormen who ripped me off.

>put together a scheme that landed undercover cops in his club

>had a dream of some gangster putting a shotgun in his mouth, maybe this really happened

>bought drugs off deep web

>went to rave in unfamilar town

>went to do drugs in toilet cubicle

>bouncer peered over

>thrown straight to cops

>spent night in cell

>following week saw strange activity around house whilst tripping on truffles

>pretty sure I was being scoped out but the raw paranoia didnt help

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 No.24055

>>14561

Where do you live that puts computers in recycling bins?

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 No.26592

>>14168

>>23853

I'm sympathetic to amendment 2 and for the reasoning of overthrowing governments if they oppress you but I can sympathize with you also with the whole 'but /pol/ said/did it' part

Oh half of /pol/ is lolbertarian after all :p

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 No.26607

>>24052

is HK as /cyber/ as it looks?

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 No.26616

>>13082

Not really badass or anything, but I think I've spent 90 percent of my life behind a screen. I consider that pretty low-life.

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 No.26646

It's not that /cyber/ but I have done vigilante stuff. I half killed a pedo who tutored my sister because the cops didn't care, I've beaten up numerous small time crooks, and I even managed to put a serious criminal operation out of action. Ironically, I've also extorted girls by sourcing nudes back to them then blackmailing them, and I've done many things that would probably be considered hard trolling, often of big institutions and public services. I made serious brouzouf by setting up a fake artist commission site, and I've been running drugs in an ethical gang for years.

On the /cyber/ front, I provide opsec to questionable activities.

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 No.26666

>>26646

>I half killed a pedo who tutored my sister because the cops didn't care

Did he even do something? Did he molest anyone or rape anyone? If not then sorry to break it to you but you're just an asshole.

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 No.26667

>>26646

WTF is an ethical gang ?

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 No.26668

>>26646

you deserve to get your ass beaten

>ethical gang

don't fool yourself shazbot

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 No.26669

>>14168

this is the least low life post I have ever read

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 No.26678

I don't seed my torrents.

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 No.26679

File: 1435773556448.png (3.44 KB,240x236,60:59,1433398603758.png)

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 No.26691

I hacked the mainframe of an oppressive megacorp even though the firewall was encrypted.

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 No.27632

>tfw my friend wich i used to go skate when was a kid, are now all robbers and drug dealers, im the only one who made it to university.

Used to, and still, search natural have almost no brouzouf to buy drugs, innawoods searching for shrooms and different trees, i've found a way to do DMT, in a common tree in my country.

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 No.27637

I picked up a prepaid debit card off the street.

Still working out how to launder the brouzouf.

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 No.27639

>>27637

Scratch that, checked the amount on the card: 0. And no info either.

Guess that's what you get when you pick up a card off the side of the road.

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 No.27643

>>13323

>Gabe Newell

>Savior of anything

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 No.27649

>>13130

>nigger-tier explosives

niggers can't into explosives

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 No.27650

>>26666

>6666

no, u

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 No.27666

shazbot here but:

>every now and then I go to rails with abandoned train cars at night and sit in a cabin inside smoking weed and watching shit on my laptop

>urbex the shit of out of an industrial complex in my city

>urbex abandoned places all the time

>chugged a bottle of cough syrup in an abandoned house once

>have some squatter punk friends in the capital

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 No.27737

>>27666

you got trips of hell you now need to do 666 mg of dxm

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 No.32651

I have a plan that involves a barcode printer and a bit of sneakiness, but barcode printers cost about $25 more than my rent for a month. Guess I'm not doin' that either.

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 No.32672

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 No.32758

File: 1441757762389.jpg (501.02 KB,1120x1600,7:10,1404881595152.jpg)

I salvage/"procure" used tech, refurbish it so it looks nice and riced, then sell it to stupid middle aged bar cretins for ridiculous prices.

I make drugs to sell to idiots. Mostly just capsuling codeine from cough syrup.

I offer networking services for a price, be it security or forced security. No questions asked.

I sometimes dox, blackmail and extort people for profit.

I'm a fantastic pickpocket and I'm great at locating improvised entry points to locked up places.

All of the above is a lie, this is not a confession. I made all this up.

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 No.32775

File: 1441771215904.png (1.19 MB,1500x1191,500:397,bkrgn.png)

Stole half my high school's folding chairs. Shoplifted external hard drives for file-servers. Used various style attacks on college profs. to garner course paperwork well in advance. Raided corporate tech recycle boxes for extraneous hardware. Annnd I've subverted security on ISP infrastructure for the sole purpose of higher download speeds.

But meh, who the fuck cares as long as shit gets done.

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 No.32778

>>32758

>>32775

>>26646

ITT: shit that totally happened.

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 No.32780

>>32778

>I'm a poser and my life is boring, you must be the same!

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 No.33854

File: 1442818375579.jpg (37.33 KB,224x257,224:257,1417330961462.jpg)

>>13132

You're the fucking coolest.

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 No.33866

>>32780

Actual hackers are too busy to browse /cyber/

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 No.34248

>>16338

That's what corps do

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 No.34277

>used reaver to procure wifi, not because I needed it, just because I could

>"hacked" an aquantainces facebook just to see if I could do it.

>when I got in I posted a lot of stuff about hating niggers and driving whilst on acid

>let him get the account back

>he was really pissed and swore to beat up whoever did it.

>never found out, smoked a joint with him a few months after the fact.

>smoked a lot of weed

>slowly but surely getting off it now

>only problem is that I'm supplimenting that with booze

>once went to jail for 40 days on a weed charge

I need to fucking get off drugs and get on learning some programming.

Also, protip: don't go to jail.

Protips if you do ever land yourself in jail though.

>If you're in a low sec jail befriend a CO

>CO will get you a jail job to help pass time

>If you get in the kitchen then no one really gives a fuck and you have access to much better foods, Ever day I ate a nice salad and garlic bread

>Other motherfuckers ate fake eggs, I always secured the real shit for myself.

>Chat up jail food ladies, they don't have anyone important in their lives and for a few kind words you could have doritos and mcdonalds

>If you have a food job at the jail make sure to put red jello mix in the cookies to make them pink, when you're giving away lunches tell every other jailed person to "enjoy your cookie, shazbot"

>Made booze in jail

>also learned how to make fucking dank jailhouse burritos and pizzas

>NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER drink the koolaid in jail, it has salt peter in it and will make it to where you can't get an erection (not like you'd really want one in that situation)

>if jail gives you a laundry job and you fuck up once you'll get fired from it

>if you try to refuse a jail job your good time will be denied

>if you need to light a cig in jail just fuck with the wiring to where you can make a spark, use toilet paper as fuel for a small fire

>jails know more about you than you'd think. I've never gone on paper as being agnostic, but once I was looking over my release papers they had it 100% accurate

>if you're a picky eater with a poor family DO NOT GO TO JAIL commisary is expensive. A 10 cent pack of ramen will run you $1.50

Most of this was about jail, but yeah you get it.

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 No.34279

>>34277

Show us the recipe of the burritos and pizzas pls

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 No.34299

>>13082

I'm high tech…………….high..pizza

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 No.34306

>smuggled pcb out between two sandwiches

get on my level

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 No.34316

>>34279

Jailhouse Burritos and pizzas are pretty similar, only real difference is the base you want to put it on

Ingredients:

>2-3 Packs of Ramen, any flavor

>Cheetos

>Pickle

>Commisary Cheese

>Whatever you can scrounge up that you want to fucking eat

-Crush up ramen to where its pretty evenly broken up, also crush up whatever cheetos you've got

-Acquire a bag, or fashion a bag out of what you can

-Put ramen/cheeto mix into bag and turn on shower to get hot water don't go to jail kids. Use just enough to where its all a bit moist

-Let that shit sit for a brief moment then proceed to work it together and roll it in bag to make a makeshift tortilla

-Once you have your tortilla you'll want to slap whatever you can on that bitch starting with a layer of cheese

-Pickles and nuts add a ton to the texture, sounds weird, tastes decent

-If you've got someone who has a kitchen job have them smuggle cold cuts of meat and salt and pepper, use that shit.

-Roll the motherfucker up, cut and share with anyone who pitched in on the bitch

-Dont forget to season with the ramen flavor. Shrimp and chilli work best for this, chicken is somewhat bland in comparrison. Don't be a basic bitch.

Like I said, Jailhouse pizzas are pretty similar, you just want to substitute cheetos for crackers, they make a thin crust pretty easy, leave crust flat on your bag and score some spoons to scoop that shit off with.

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 No.34328

>>34316

Does it taste good compared to the "official" thing ?

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 No.34332

>>34328

If you were to eat it as a poor college student its passable, I've made them at home before when I'm down on brouzouf. It's not nutritious by any means but its filling. You could probably do better though pending on what you had in hand.

As far as compared to what they serve in the jail it's absolute heaven. Most meals in a jail situation are comprised of mechanically separated chicken and really shitty beans in some form or fashion. Do yourself a favor and don't look up mechanically separated chicken, it's the most disgusting thing I've ever seen.

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 No.34376

I downloaded things off the internet illegally.

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 No.34377

>>34332

It looks like pink ice cream oh god; but apparently now it's derezzed for human consumption all-together since it could contain bovine spongiform encephalopathy

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 No.34387

>>34377

Silly citizen, prisoners aren't human. Gotta keep those jail profits high!

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 No.35331

Shoplifted a pair of earbuds.

Fuck me, I'm lame. But hey, got earbuds, and avoided getting caught by the RFID tag inside the package.

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 No.35332

>>35331

Oh, shit, I just had an idea:

>grab something off the shelf that has an NFC or RFID tag for theft detection

>read the data off that tag

>put item back

>put the data from that item onto another tag (for best results, an active-RFID tag, so you can turn it on and off)

>need a distraction? Toss it at one of those theft-detection thingies that you find in front of store entrances/exits. Set the alarms off, make everyone stop and look at the "theft in progress"!

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 No.35711

>>13082

>How low life are you?

I used to install prank-ware and malware on people's computers when they left it open at school.

Used to have a special little tool made from a paper-clip to short out people's computers while they were doing something important looking.

Been stealing liquor from stores since I was in high school. Currently a filthy, unwashed alcoholic.

Taught my 10 year old niece how to bypass windows login passwords with a live usb.

Currently write malware and other silly side projects to keep myself sane.

I hang out at my local club known for prostitution and drug deals. I walk right in because bouncers and bartenders know me while chumps pay $10 cover charge.

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 No.37645

>>35711

How'd you do the usb thing?

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 No.37646

>>37645

I think he just booted into a linux distro through live usb.

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 No.37735

File: 1449179068853.jpg (12.94 KB,255x143,255:143,1447763214810.jpg)

>>13130

We made a smaller version of a railgun in my electricity and mag class when our professor didn't show up to work one day.

I directed the first test shot at a redditor who wouldn't stop spouting his fucking memes all the time.

mfw it leaves a bloody welt and he's too beta to do anything about it

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 No.37814

I ran out of brouzouf and had to drop out of college and become homeless. Now I survive by sneaking into the dining halls and sleeping/showering in campus buildings when they're closed.

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 No.37816

>>14168

That's not, "Low-life," that's, "Corporate(style) douchebaggery." You're the guy the cyberpunk main characters wind up killing.

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 No.37817

>>23831

Damn. When I was at Boys' State the most I did was head up the budget committee in getting the state budget passed in record time.

FYI, the governor always goes to Boys Nation as an actual rule of the program, and he's always some useless moron who's either a puppet or a lame duck.

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 No.37820

>>37814

Tell stories bro, also tips on the social engineering you use to sneak into dining halls.

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 No.37822

>>37820

> the social engineering you use to sneak into dining halls.

It's actually a backdoor in a seldom-use seating area that has a shitty lock I can open with my pocket knife, sorry.

One social engineering tip I can give is that when you're on a university campus and you dress well, you can do almost anything without being questioned, and there are all sorts of group gatherings you can just walk up to and get free food from.

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 No.37829

taking 10% out of every capsule of anything i sold and getting a free one for every ten i sold

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 No.37833

>>37814

Damn son. Where you the chummer that posted the homeless thread?

Hope you're doing alright.

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 No.37836

>>37833

I was not. This thread is my first time posting about my situation.

I'm getting by. Next month I actually might get hired tutoring compsci and doing some freelance android development at the same time, so things will improve then. Thanks.

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 No.37854

>>37822

Tailored suit kind of well dressed ?

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 No.37855

>>37854

Cheap department-store (or secondhand, I got mine on ebay last year,) suit well-dressed, mostly. People who know business suits would know I don't have a lot of brouzouf, but most people just figure I'm a business major who's either giving an important presentation or going to an important meeting today.

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 No.37902

>>35332

That's a lot of effort. Grab the shit and just walk out. They don't do shit, since there's so many false positives.

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 No.37910

You're not gonna believe me anyway, but screw it:

>about 5 years ago

>job as a penetration tester at a webdev company

>decent pay

>hadn't gotten laid in a year

>fuck it, gonna hire me a prostitute

>40 bucks for half an hour, cute girl, whynot.jpg

>take only 20 minutes cause major blue balls

>that'll be 120 then

>tell her I watched the clock

>not all clocks run the same, sugar

>the weird alarm clock in her room shows 3 hours passed

>get into argument

>she ends up pulling out a knife

>pull .357 out of my pocket in reflex,fire round into the bed

>drops knife

cont.

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 No.37911

>>37910

>hear security, drop gun

>door gets busted

>ohshit.png

>gangsters with pimp

>wrong move, asshole

>they search my pockets for dosh

>find my business card

>pimp's expression goes from angry to smug

>hey, how 'bout a deal, fuckface?

>you get me everything you can find on [major customer]

>what I get?

>no bullet to the face

>ohgodfuck.gif

cont.

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 No.37912

>>37911

>agree

>pick up a handheld scanner

>go to work

>start scanning the paperwork

>boss enters

>asks me what I'm doing

>say I want to archive stuff on our bigger customers

>oh, okay

>that was close

>get the data to who I assume to be a local mob boss

>get to work the next day

>the mob boss told my employer about this shit

>run like hell

I hauled ass to Russia and lived in an abandoned train yard for 13 months straight before I dared find a job again.

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 No.37916

>>13132

>feeling pity for molesters

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 No.37917

>>13225

You life sounds pretty schway

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 No.37942

>>37910

>>37911

>>37912

>fire round into bed

And that's when I knew you were pants-on-head retarded.

>drop gun before security busts in

And that's when I knew you were lying.

>the mob boss told my employer about this shit

And that's when I started laughing.

I mean, it was a decent ride, but it reads like fiction, and particularly bad fiction at that.

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 No.37992

>>37912

>Hauled ass to russia

>Plane ticket costs like $2000

>Couldn't even pay a hooker

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 No.37994

>>37836

Really hope things work out for you bro.

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 No.38035

>>37994

Thanks, man.

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 No.38066

>>13132

Well done mate.

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 No.38088

-I used to beat the shit of low-grade, weak fake gangstas that were bullying kids when I was in Highschool, done it for thrill, sometimes I stole their goods. Never got jacked by the police yet.

-Used to drop info and pics of sluts I knew.

-Done urbex few times, got access to places I wasn't supposed to be.

-Stole pens and floppies when I was in highschool

-Used to help bringing alcohol into school.

-Sneaked into one of my friend's house when he was away, but never stole anything.

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 No.38159

>>37942

Told ya.

Honestly, I don't require you to believe me. At this point I'm just glad I have a job.

>>37992

When you hire a hooker you NEVER EVER take more brouzouf with you than you want to spend, let alone your credit card. Take some ID, brouzouf, driver's license, that's it.

I WANTED to spend 50 at max.

She charged me for 1.5 hours. Just noticed I had a brain fart and mistyped that, too.

Got another story from my childhood to share if you like.

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 No.38245

>>13598

Fuck, I was kinda like this too, I deeply regret it. I spent most of the time reading stuff on the internet though, which is probably better than just playing games.

Anyway, I did do some hacking in middle school. It was really nothing advanced, but I managed to change the desktop wallpaper (this was locked, and it always showed info on the user that was logged in last time) into Goatse, this was done multiple times. I also whiped a network drive the teachers used to store stuff on, and then I put a textfile there with my handle. The admin knew that it was me who did everything, and he apparently said that he was gonna have a talk with me, but he never did actually.

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 No.42202

>>37645

konboot to just bypass

chntpw with a linux liveusb to change the password

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 No.42226

I don't have anything nearly as impressive as the guys inside this thread.

When I was in elementary school, computers had the weakest fucking security. While other schools had firewalls and other cyber-safety measures, we had a 'mutual trust system'. Also managed to manipulate a lot of people by making a social map of who people liked and disliked. In middle school, I just did purely stupid shit. I broke disks and spread them around rooms, did drugs, broke into phones, did some minor doxxing, etc. Basically just an edgy 14 year old. Highschool though, I had to pick up my pace. First off, the entire fucking school thought I was the 'MLG 1337 H4X0R' and I was constantly being asked to do shit like steal accounts, passwords, break into phones, get them drugs, etc. Never did any of that shit in the beginning, but the brouzouf started to add up so I succumbed. I made fucking bank because I was in a fairly big town with a rising opium addiction problem. I also got into explosives, and eventually set off a few of them around campus. I stopped everything after I got into Virginia Tech because I was not going to get kicked out. Right now, the situation is like High School, but with less illegal stuff and more asking to explain the deep web, bit coins, etc. More annoying than High School, because no payoff.

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 No.42227

I run a hacking services website on the darknet. People pay me BTC to hack accounts and other shit. Sometimes I do what they want, sometimes I just take the BTC.

I use the BTC to buy drugs on the darknet markets. I can buy an ounce of weed for cheap, then flip it at $20/g, making hella profit. Basically smoke for free.

I use Kali Nethunter on a Nexus device to hack wifi and do MITM attacks, just because I can.

When I was younger, I'd hack and deface websites for fun.

I make extra brouzouf on the side fixing computers, removing viruses, pretty much whatever computer-related shit people will pay me for.

I'm sure there's other shit that I can't think of right now.

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 No.42230

File: 1467286921666.jpg (9.08 KB,225x225,1:1,1383333682300.jpg)

>>38088

Pretty cool guy, actually. Also, schway as fuck.

I sometimes do the same things, just do stuff to see if I COULD actually do it in a pinch. Stealing, breaking and entering, shit like that.

Of course, urbex doesn't really count as breaking and entering, but I managed to take out an alarm once. Measured the voltage, found that both cables were live. Bridged them, cut them from the window mechanism, done.

Was kinda proud, but never told anyone, obviously.

>>42227

Damn son, don't cut yourself on those edges.

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 No.42238

>>13132

>>13145

Anon you are so fucking cool.

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 No.42758

I once set up a basic -s shutdown thing in high school with a message on it. Ran it for 30 min after I left, and nobody figured out how it worked, and the people there thought it was a virus.

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 No.42762

I've used social engineering to take over someone's online life and banking. No I am not saying any more. It is too incriminating.

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 No.42777

>>13082

I'm too much of a pussy to do something truly motherfuckish. Once though I wrote a keylogger in x86 assembly (NAsm to be specific) and gave it to a friend. He ran it once, when a teacher logged himself into the school's Moodle platform using my friend's laptop (the teacher sometimes asked students to let him log in on their system, because he couldn't be arsed to boot up his own computer – what a shithead tbh) His PW was most probably his wife's first name and some digits, but I can't remember exactly.

Also, I used to make "fake" keygens. As in, they didn't actually generate the keys, but instead they had a ton of working keys saved and upon the click of a button they randomly spewed one of 'em. I know, it's not as schway as reverse engineering some megacorp's license key algorithm and giving it away to fellow chummers, but hey, I was young and wanted to be feel like a cyber badass.

I'd really love to do some actual /cyber/ tier low-lifishness, like urban exploring and staying in abandoned places for extended periods of time while doing high-tech things and drugs. I'd also love to go dumpster diving and build a perversely extreme übermachine from the parts I salvaged while selling all the crap I couldn't utilize. Sadly I live in a remote bumfuck town, where both of these things aren't really possible.

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 No.42783

Does anyone have any methods that work now?

I was thinking of doing the wardriving and database procuring, but I've been informed in the UK now most of them have seed numbers hidden in them by licensors to prevent reselling, as well as most call centres starting to cut out wireless in order to prevent precisely this.

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 No.42790

File: 1469711956754.png (679.33 KB,870x738,145:123,1469466357689.png)

>>14168

TEACH ME YOUR WAYS SENSEI

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 No.42818

>>13082

I have one.

This one time. I smoke half of a cigarette.

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 No.42881

>stole benzedrex inhalers from walgreens a few times to get stimmed up

>done and sold decent amount and variety of drugs since middle school

>turned 18, sold cigarettess to underaged high school classmates for 2x price

>addicted to IV heroin for last half of senior year of high school

>broke into abandoned factories and other buildings with buddies from sober house after aforementioned heroin addiction

>shot dope with homeless people in Salt Lake City, lived in park for a couple days

>posting right now on 3rd plateau DXM so I probably forgot a few stories

anyone else find a DXM high to have an inherent /cyber/ feel?

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 No.43066

I once spit bubblegum out on the sidewalk, you caught me feds…

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 No.43069

I'm making a pornsite for extra d0sh and I grew up as a poor literal shazbot in Atlanta. I'm no where near as much of an immoral piece of shit as most of the people in this thread though.

I found a 0-day in this http://edgenuity.com/ last week, and instead of using it to get perfect grades for the entirety of senior year, I called them and told them about it.

Edgy niggers get off my /cyber/. This is all #/g/punk's fault.

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 No.46949

>>14168

>no embezzlement but plenty of… misappropriation of university and student government funds

I don't think you know what that word means

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 No.46950

Back when pokemon was big, you could earn rare promo cards for getting trainer badges. They had 16 badges, 8 for each gym in R/B and 8 for each gym in G/S.

You got one stamp for losing, two for winning IIRC.

Anyways, I was irritated because despite consistently winning, the shittier players often lost quickly.

This one kid (who also would try to steal cards) kept needling me about his "record". Same kid almost got me thrown out for "threatening a little kid" after I slammed by box shut on his hand and told him if I saw his hand in my collection again I'd kick his ass.

(I took Tae Kwan Do at the mall, was 12 and fucking huge, he was 10 or 11 and tiny for his age, I would have destroyed him with or without my martial arts skills!)

I asked the ratio to be changed so those of us who actually crafted decent decks and leveled up our skills weren't punished, but the guy who ran the league was having none of it.

The stamp was a custom deal, little star thing with pokemon league on it. Green. He had a couple of them.

I stole one when he wasn't looking.

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE.

I asked the douchecanoe who kept trying to steal my cards and painting me as a bully for flipping out on him for his attempted thefts for a truce. I agreed to put down a bunch of wins, so he'd get a rare promo faster.

(These promos usually were initially able to be sold for decent brouzouf for a kid - 40-50 bucks, then got cheaper as market saturated)

League guy totally knew he didn't play like 30 people in one day and told him he was derezzed for 2 weeks.

Meanwhile, I stuck to simply padding my wins a bit each week. Not enough to notice but I slowly built up an impressive win record.

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 No.46951

there's a lot of shoplifting stuff so I might as well mention my friend.

He was an absolute GOD at that. He says now that he was a full on kleptomaniac back then and couldn't control it. Here's some examples.

>high as fuck on oxys

>kinda hungry

>go into shop, say high to security guard

>walk straight up to sandwich section, grabs two sandwiches

>turns around and walks straight out not even hiding them just pure confidence

>no one notices.

>in a shop stoned

>shop keeper turns aronud for 2 seconds

>he grabs this massive bong and hides it under his jacket

>continues to talk to shop owner for like a minute before leaving with this huge bong.

>still uses it to this day

>trying to steal some beer

>drops it, shop owner sees and yells at him

>shouts 'ravioli ravioli give me the formuoli' and runs out with the beers in his hands

>gets away with it

>eating fried chicken but he couldn't afford to buy much

>out of no where he just looks at me and says 'fuck iiit'

>jumps over the counter, grabs a bunch of chicken wings, jumps back out and runs

>I'm just sitting there in shock eating my burger

He's never been arrested or stopped by cops ever

I wish I was as brave as him.

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 No.47095

I skip commercials and advertisements.

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 No.47096

When I was a kid, during the Yugioh times, me and my friend liked to use his dad professional-tier printer with special papers. We printed a good quantity of bootled yugioh cards, and sell them to idiotic cool kids that tought "If it's heavy paper, it's an official.

We tradem the bootleg cards for various legit ones.

Despell, celtic guard, fissure, you name it, we mostly got basic cards.

The most interesting trades we made was a red eyed black dragoon in exchange of 2 rageki and a crass clown. Good times.

Also, during urbex sessions, I managed to grab a shitton of floppies, picked up a 56k message modem manufactured by 3com or some shit like that. And also a metal warning sign.

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 No.47099

I'm a small time graffiti artist, and I love fucking around in abandoned buildings.

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 No.47103

>>47099

That's cool man, what kind of places have you visited?

Old Megacorp buildings? defunct plants?

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 No.47108

>>47103

I live out in the sticks so there's a lot of abandoned farm buildings and nothing in the way of cool military/corp. shit.

The most interesting places I have been where an old flour mill and a small, abandoned theme park.

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 No.47110

>>47099

>>47108

Share pics.

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 No.47111

>>47108

Who dude, this sounds cool, found any interesting artefacts in them?

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 No.47120

>>47110

I don't own a camera, sorry.

>>47111

The mill apparently had squatters, used needles everywhere, nothing worth keeping.

The park had a seemingly stocked gift shop still locked up, I guess the owners thought they might open back up but never did.

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 No.47776

>>13145

well, would you do the same thing again? would you do anything different?

fuck that guy. i wish more people like you would be doing things like that to shady people. to me that is some true super hero shit.

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 No.47781

I'm boring.

>2010

>13 year old kid with some 2006 era laptop

>new school year begins and so I start at a completely new school

>bored in class, check for WLAN networks

>there's exactly one network and it's WEP (lol) protected

>spend a few days fucking around in Windows

>download BackTrack

>teacher gets sick and I go to another class for a day

>think fuckit.jpg

>crack network within 10 minutes

>no one noticing

>connect on phone

>use Youtube to play music in class 'n shit

>never told anyone

God, I felt like I was awesome, but looking back on it, it was skid tier shit though.

More low-life story:

>some Turkish woman her washing machine breaks

>it's a LG POS

>go there

>see early 2000s Miele outside

>ignore it for now

>check LG

>pump not running

>politely tell them "your machine is basically dead" even though I have no fucking idea what's wrong with it

>ask them about that Miele

>it's leaking from the front

>take it home to fix it

>ended up being the husband being a complete nignog, he pulled the door seal off the tub while trying to lift it upstairs

>lie and tell them the circuit board is blown, should I fix it or throw it away

>throw it away they said

>dad and I managed to get the seal back on

>sold it for 150€

I normally don't pull shit like this, but since A. it was not close to home and I couldn't be arsed to bring it back, and B. I needed the €€€€ for more important stuff.

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 No.47783

>>16410

Low-life is to survive and get by in the blurry underground of the world. Not some empty political pretense, concocted by privileged middle-class victimists.

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 No.47784

>>47783

This, I feel like being a low-life is actually very post-political. It is doing actions because you feel like doing them not with some overriding logic necessarily.

Why did Satoshi Nakamoto make bitcoin? You know? Your actions are their own political statement. Politics itself is null, only aesthetics count.

Low-life is an aesthetic, not a perscription for how to actually make decisions. If that makes any sense.

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 No.47815

>>47781

I just connected to the wifi and used the passwords that were on the teachers' computers… Guess that makes me a top tier hacker too, yeah?

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 No.47816

>>13082

I smoked a joint right before I walked into class in high school. I was a month away from graduation. I had all my scholarships and free rides to universities and shit. Accidentally left the roach in my pocket, so I put it in the back pack in a little wannabe bully freshman. He ended up getting expelled for that. I got away thinking "marijuana does ruin your life." I haven't smoked since.

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 No.47822

>>13082

I used to play a game with friends called "Electro-Man" where every time we went to someone's house, party, apartment etc; we would take the batteries from whatever we could. TV Remotes, Xbox controllers etc.

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 No.47823

>>42881

>Steal Benzedrex to stim up

They're like $5 at Walmart

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 No.47858

File: 968a0daa088d441⋯.png (141.38 KB,600x900,2:3,1504220920031.png)

>>47823

You clearly don't understand what it means to be *lowlife*

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 No.47890

>>47783

Nor is it being a filthy junkie. In fact, that's a great way to get yourself killed.

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 No.47908

>>13180

how did you get the ID printer?

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 No.47909

>>47784

>Low-life is an aesthetic

fucking hipsters

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 No.47911

File: 09ab752849881f0⋯.jpg (377.59 KB,1920x1200,8:5,1504294902674.jpg)

Alright then picture this if you will.

>broke ass college student.

>need cheap rent.

>know a guy when their brother died had left him his house.

> dont know much about it just that he plans to rent it out to some neets for almost nothing, thought I had hit the jackpot.

>agree to move in only to find the place is a fucking dump that looks like it used to be a crackhouse beacuse it was.

>become literal basement dweller living in what looks to be the remains of a crackden, cause well it was.

>jackass landlord and roomates.

>landlord forgets to pay for the internet sometimes.

>some people nearby have WEP security stil.

>password get.

>everyone still buttblasted about no internet

>going through all this work just to post on a fucking mongolian fingerpainting board.

>over the time im there swap peoples keyboards to dvorak and engage in general techno buggery.

>I am motherfucker.

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 No.47912

>>47911

>swap peoples keyboards to dvorak

That's just evil.

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 No.47913

File: 6264d5a3b5bd3ef⋯.png (69.35 KB,573x966,191:322,punpun_by_xxsiliciaxx-d7t1….png)

I would say it varies. I've done plenty of bad stuff, but good stuff too.

Not like you can objectify which is which.

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 No.47927

>>24009

Over two fucking years and still no answer. What has the world come to?

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 No.47930

I had a friend (we'll call him Brian) who's sister (we'll call her Sally) was a druggie. She would constantly lie and 'borrow' money, and kept on bringing home the worst kind of white trash guys. Eventually, Brian had enough and came to me, "Anon, you know hacker stuff, right? I need you to install a keylogger so we can catch Sally in the act."

Now, they only "Hacker stuff" I've ever done is install Linux and run a Battlefront 2 server, but he eventually convinced me. Because I'm paranoid as fuck, I got some brouzouf together, bought a re-loadable gift card, exchanged that for Bitcoin, and bought a keylogger USB on a sketchy TOR site.

I gave him the keylogger, and he Solid Snaked into Sally's room, and after a few weeks we had her login for facebook. Turns out she's been buying cocaine and heroin from one of her exes.

Like the earlier guy who got the dad busted, I felt bad. I won't go into it, but Brian turned out to be a total psycho and a compulsory liar. He was right about the drug use, but instead of helping his sister he just berated her to the point she had several suicide attempts.

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 No.48139

File: 5fa609c1b04b442⋯.jpg (74.82 KB,547x511,547:511,1414267578510.jpg)

>>13132

i hope this is real

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 No.48144

>>13082

One time I used imagemagick to flip all the images on an acquaintances hard drive upside down because he annoyed me in some way (I forget how). Incidentally he came to me asking for help fixing it. I told him his video card must be glitching.

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 No.48217

>>13132

>i doxxed him

>fantasy begins.

Hackers don't exist the way you think they do. "Hacking" is not a punk job, its a military/government/Hackteam kinda job that pays a fortune. Its not the kind of thing were you brag about molesting your daughter on forums to strangers who pretend to be your friends, but you couldn't tell because you were forgot to turn on incognito.

Even if low skill cyber criminal ("I am from Microsoft, and your PC has a virus"..) , who the fuck has such garbage OPSEC that they believe there friend registered an account on a forum to talk to them? "Oh look, its my neighbor, communicating with my anonymous hacker identity, let me tell him about the time i molested my daughter". Also, chat transcripts now count as evidence… Also, you don't use anything in court against him for molesting his daughter… Thats gunna be criminal court.

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 No.48218

>>13145

Epic levels of fantasy. To get out of child molestation charges, confess to additional crimes. Would work.

>We eventually settled the case with him agreeing to give up custody.

Not how criminal cases work. You don't sue him. Criminal cases are government vs. individual.

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 No.48219

>>13146

Lol bruh. Molestation isn't the samething as sex.

>>13168

You realize that raping a child is different than child molestation?

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 No.48231

>>48219

> but I'm too busy being a pedant to back it up

Contribute something or shut the fuck up.

>>47890

That's what a lot of people are forgetting. Low-life is more than an attitude, can't just call yourself that to be cool, you have to actually DO shit.

>>13082

Self-aware not-low-life here, I haven't really done shit. Too busy getting through all the bullshit between me and independence before I have the resources to do anything noteworthy.

I remember a guy in high school, though, who noticed that the schools across town were (mostly?) all on the same network. Convenience, I guess, and none of them bothered with security. Guy in question figured out how to remotely shut down computers in other buildings, had a blast for a while until the tech department locked down every utility (including task manager) out of spite.

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 No.48234

>>48231

Back what up? That guy had a retarded story where he somehow sued his gfs father for child custody because he molested her with sex after finding out he was an enemey hacker and pwning him with by sending him a private message pretending to be his friend on the internet - which apparently was admissible evidence.

My life? I am not all that cyber. I work greater than full time for less than minimum wage fixing computers under the table in a major urban area. I do it because fuck the government, I'd rather not pay taxes and contribute to the monster.

I have a shit ton of different hobbies, but right now, I am rewriting a simple database driven app in C for quantified self analystics.

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 No.48237

Not the 1337357 story out there, but it actually happened and I have fond memories of it.

>be in college, 2005

>Windows XP and Windows Server 2003 were a regular sight

>had an easy time at college because I was sort of handy with computers

>I get assignment to write a paper about 3D engines, had to be finished the same day

>spend an hour or two in this "media library" which was just a room with about 50 computers

>all of them had a monitoring agent

>there's a desk next to the entrance with two computers and two 40's something hags that monitored the computers against abuse

>I start googling images for my paper

>"anon, those are games, you can't do that while you're in here!", said one of two power tripping dried grapes

>she takes over my mouse cursor with the monitoring agent and closes everything, including paper (which I hadn't bothered saving yet)

>holy shit the anger

>I get derezzed that day for throwing a fit while I was clearly in the wrong

>before I leave I promise them I'll make their job the fucking worst

Fast forward, 2 weeks later I started C# and ASP class

>teacher mentions AutoHotKey gives quick results, good for productivity

>I download and install

>how does I computer.exe?

>find example of someone doing basic stuff like playing sounds and showing pictures

>I write a library with tons of these basic functions

>also create a simple pull client that downloads an encrypted ini file that holds a command and revision number

>integrate all of it and make a Trojan that infects computers via USB and, if it had the rights, the hidden share of C partition (C$)

I know, not very high tech, but I was young and this was my first entry into programming. Anyways…

>leave USB drive with my Trojan linger around

>within three days all computers in the media room had my Trojan

> time for revenge

>I play around with the internal speaker at home, see what frequency is high enough just so you can hear it, but isn't very notable (CRT televisions had this tone, which is where I got my inspiration)

>send command to play the frequency for indefinite amount of time to my bots

Day one:

>people leave the media room, they subconsciously feel uncomfortable there, a few that worked longer got headaches

Day two:

>there is definitely something wrong in the media room, the monitoring hoebags also report headaches, but nobody can find the cause, it's probably a flu.

Day five:

>yeah, probably not the flu, the headaches must come from bad ventilation. While uncommon during winter, the ventilation is turned on and the heater as well to counter the cold (climate control)

Week two:

>people don't stay longer than 15 minutes in the media room, the two bitches that fucked me over refuse to go home sick even though they start to feel nauseous, still convinced it's the flu

Week five:

>a student notices that leaving the media room gives a relieving feel to the ears, reports it to janitor

>janitor checks climate control the next day, perhaps one of the fans has a broken ball bearing?

Week six:

>because of new lighting, the power to that specific room is cut off, the two room monitors feel better within minutes

> they think it's computer fans making the sounds, they call the company that facilitates the computers, appointment is set for next week

Week seven:

>the company can't find the cause in the fans, but after long troubleshooting in a different room with one of the computers they find that removing the speaker works

>all internal speakers are removed and the nuisance seems gone

>both room monitors get hearing test the next week

>hearing is impaired, one of them needs an aid

>I see her with a hearing aid, so I send another command to the botnet that shows a fullscreen "I hope you like your new hearing aid, asshole" on screen

They never traced it back to me because I used a free hosting service and sending commands was a matter of making ini files and encrypting them, no need for any C&C server with questionable traffic, the bots used HTTP to pull commands every minute or so. I handicapped someone's hearing and I genuinely feel good about it. These two fucks were tyrants and everyone hated them.

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 No.48238

File: b4291f9305ecc27⋯.jpg (21.4 KB,315x310,63:62,[toeren maken intensiveerd….jpg)

>>48237

low life/10

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 No.48242

>>48237

My droog, i think you ment to post on /r/thathappend.

Its totally implausible that some shit like this wouldn't make the news, and that you wouldn't have been caught.

The problem woudldn't resolve itself, and they figured out it was speakers. Eventually, they would isolate as software problem, and because of your message you basically told them. Forensic analysis on PC's would pin point an autist in your teachers class with a grduge against media dept. Also, what http server. Also, what do you mean inifiles where encrypted? You don't control the endpoint , so of course IT will have access to decrypted INI file. Encrypted in transit? The endpoint of the transit will be suspucious, every computer in the lab connects to this address via http every minute. Also, host security. How did your program persist? Every university I have ever been to reimages computers nightly with deepthaw or w/e program that is.

but, its a well written story.

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 No.48248

I live in rural East Texas, I have no brouzouf to buy enough food to gain weight, I'm just able to maintain the same weight, I used to have a job but I blew so much of the brouzouf on weed and then I switched from indica to sativa and it gave me crippling anxiety for months and since the beginning of the year I've been dealing with weird health issues that caused me to quit my job and doctors can't figure out what's going on.

I'm way more low life than I am high tech. All of my tech is shit.

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 No.48249

>>48242

>forensic analysis

>on a school

>one autist

>on a school for computer classes

>"my university does XYZ"

>so your college did too in 2005

>media lab operators deliberately destroys homework

>but somehow only one person has a grudge

I get your nitpicking but at least make it worthwhile.

The company that installed the infrastructure knew how to set up a Windows domain, that's a huge step down from software analysis. The ini files were decrypted in memory, these sysadmins had trouble finding the agent, let alone decompile it. You're giving a bunch of nerds way too much credit.

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 No.48252

>>48249

>forensic analysis

>on a school

After you destroy some janitor's (0.5 * professor? ) hearing, and send him a message about it, its going to make the news. Feds are going to be called in. It will be a big fucking deal. Its not like the forensics will be hard either. Every computer will apparently be making http connections to one host, and running an autoit script, that must fucking be in the startup folder, b/c how else would it autostart (w/o exploit to obtain admin?) . Like 2 seconds worth of analysis will result in something tangible.

I can't say 100% it would result in OP caught. But, this muthafucka is writing a 'virus' using autoit , is he really that leet at antiforensics? He even had a half baked idea about encrypted ini files - which makes no sense. Encrypting commands to bots make sense when you are worried about being on AV signature list , but not when your a unique narrowly targeted attack below site (and heuristics don't exist). And endpoints must be able to decrypt inifile, and OP doesn't control endpoints. What do encrypted ini files provide?

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 No.48254

File: 378f0d296c19002⋯.jpg (389.95 KB,1500x1093,1500:1093,1507890530299.jpg)

>>13082

>literally third-world

>wages are shit

>taxes high af so everything expensive

>have to rely on smugglers to buy tech

>no warranty, if you don't who you're dealing with fuckers might ran away with your brouzouf or give you a box with a brick inside

>used tech is more expensive than new tech overseas

>companies destroy stuff before throwing it away so no dumpster diving tech

>even a decent rig is expensive af here

>most people are using toasters

>my current rig is now over 4 years old

>cant afford to upgrade

>fixing my cellphone and adding every mod available so I can keep using it

>broadband is shit, get less than 1mbps upload

>fucking gov is now going to put a 21% tax on stuff like steam

>everything is overpriced, shitty quality and obsolete

>my doc just told me I should move because the air in the city is getting worse

>literally going to have to wear an actual gas mask when going outside

Beat this shazbots

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 No.48255

>>48254

Can you say more on where you live?

Sounds like pre-collapse USSR

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 No.48256

>>13225

>> Roommate sells porn online to pay for his part of the rent,

What kind of porn? of him?

>selling my bodily fluids

which fluids

>>13261

>>used Tor to circumvent filters and DL backtrack linux at the library…

>downloading a nearly 1GB ISO on slow af tor

Did you camp there for a week?

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 No.48257

>>48255

>Sounds like pre-collapse USSR

Not as bad…..or good since you could get crazy shit for cheap in russia back then, like a fucking mil-spec heli let alone a harem of highclass hookers

I'll give you a clue: its literally the ass-end of the world

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 No.48264

>>48252

I was afraid someone would overwrite the ini files because it was a free public webhost, rather have no command than one made by someone that's not me. Also, I'm in Europe, no feds here. The only time we saw any cop on the school was when someone changed grades to 10's, which was retarded.

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 No.48271

>>48257

China, Afghanistan maybe ? South Africa ?

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 No.48272

>>48257

>>48271

Wait, ass-end of the world like on the other side of the world or is it some kind of designated shitting street related hint ? India ?

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 No.48275

>>48254

Damn. 2real4me ._.

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 No.48294

>>48254

If it wasn't shit broadband, I'd say you live in Eastern Europe, somewhere between Bratislava and Western Urals.

Maybe South America? Uma delicia?

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 No.48304

>>48294

vc fala ?

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 No.48310

>>48254

>No famine

>No epidemics

>No war-level rate of murder

>No narcos and terrorists ruling the country

You're almost fine, mate. Come to the 5th world.

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 No.48369

>>48254

Brasil porra, país de merda que vivemos.

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 No.48371

Dumpster diving no Brasil é possível?

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 No.48372

>>48369

Ha muitos brasileiros na internete neh? tenho visto portugues em redor.

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 No.49022

>>13225

Out of everything I've read in this thread, this user's life is the most schway

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 No.49027

>>13104

fucking monster

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 No.49028

>>13225

the cyberpunkest guy here

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 No.49039

>>48254

Hello there, fellow Brasilian.

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 No.49040

>>49039

*Brazilian

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 No.49059

Low life, but not much high tech. I'm basically a shazbot.

>Rarely paid for alcohol in my life, convinced other people to do it for me or stole it.

>Took nudes off of a co-workers laptop while she was in the bathroom and/or smoking in case I need them for extortion later. Also have access to her fetlife account.

>Had a run in with the RCMP cyber crimes division for "hate speech", no charges were laid because the guys here are pretty chill and don't really give a fuck. Know some friends of friends and friends of family in RCMP as well.

>Bought drugs off of silkroad before it went down.

>Use TOR or proxies to shitpost on boards when they're down.

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 No.49064

>>49059

>Canadian Cyberpunk

Talk about crazy.

I'm pretty fucking lowlife honestly.

>200gb of anarchist/k/g/ material on my computer

>own personal router that I play around with

>send texts using email because fuck paying for mobile phones, still waiting for the return of mobile phreaking god damnit.

<Real quick: You can find SMS gateways and send a text to a phone using their phone number (no dashes) @ an SMS gateway. For instance, verizon is xxxxxxxxxx@vtext.com

>pocket anything electronically useful from goodwill, they're a bullshit artist tax evasion program using what little poor people get anyway

>Urbexing and living homeless on and off just so I can feel disconnected from this wire-covered hellhole

>Learning both Japanese and Russian just to get their media for free, they can't fight an international download and anime/stalker ain't bad.

>Don't do drugs because they're expensive but I won't turn a good offer down from someone I trust.

>Tor is great for using sites blocked in the US

Don't even get me started on how I live my personal life, with no hot water and disposable 10 cent razor blades for shaving with my bare hands.

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 No.49080

>>49064

>Russian just to get their media

what russian media do you consume?

>Tor is great for using sites blocked in the US

what sites are blocked from the US?

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 No.49081

>>49080

Not much, Russia acts as a sort of bounce for american media and japanese media. I can find things that I want in english through russian sites but I don't know enough russian to actually consume media in their language. I can do minimal comparatively where I'm ~n4 nearing n3 with japanese. I mostly watch liveleaks of their street fights or road rages and listen to some rap groups like Little Big. I like how smooth the syllables sound in Japanese and Russian rap compared to how absolute trash english is for rap.

Last thing I downloaded was all the monster girl encyclopedia crap when it came out and a huge warhammer 40k repository all in russian/english.

I use Tor minimalistically to access conversion sites for downloading music. Not to mention onion sites, for their obvious usages.

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 No.49082

>>49080

Doublepost here but a lot of 'blocked in USA' issues have to do with DMCA or media rights, so you use Tor to bypass the cease and desists send internationally.

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 No.49084

File: 7e1637f7a281856⋯.jpg (47.39 KB,720x726,120:121,26239774_2107100739524553_….jpg)

>>13225

pic of network infrastructure? plz

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 No.49085

I was able to steal a bunch of GPU's from my uni when I was in grad school, back when Bitcoin was new. Mined a bit. Also put miners on several general machines in our research lab. Eventually heard through grapevine they were searching for them, so I sold the mining rig on Craigslist a city over for cash.

The campus IT guy I was friends with, the one who'd bitched to me they aren't locking up the area I got these things from, I told him I was researching password cracking and he happily told me that if traffic doesn't go out on the network, IT doesn't care.

He also told me if you are in the lab group, you get access to the physical resources of all the lab computers.

(Most calcuations and shit were done on a cluster - but the individual CPUs on the physical computers were often underused because dumb purchasing people bought tricked out towers when dumb terminals would have been fine - your tax dollars at work)

Anyways, I mined a decent amount of BTC, and promptly forgot about it.

Years later, hated my job, check the value. 1BTC is up from 100 a btc to ~1k, and I have enough BTC I could sell them and live off it for a year or two.

Around this time lost my job, and had trouble finding another. BTC rises more, now it's like 10k per BTC. I now have a LOT of money.

End up flying to vegas… tell parents I won a little brouzouf playing poker and I want to try my luck for a few days. In reality, I sell a large chunk on local bitcoins, and store it in a safe deposit box in vegas.

It just sits in a safe deposit box now. I need to launder it somehow. Considering moving to Vegas - crosssing a border with it seems dangerous. I figure I could slowly launder it at casinos, or just get a shitty job and spend it.

The problem is like in Goodfellas, major expenses are hard to deal with and if I move out of my basement people will wonder how I did so :/

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 No.49086

>>49085

Not to shit on your cyberpunk crime fantasy but you could just pay the long-term capital gains tax on that and probably still walk away with a good chunk of cash

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 No.49087

>>49085

Try investing your brouzouf into some internet SEO shit and scale it up, if you program you can say you make brouzouf working as a freelancer.

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 No.49093

>>49086

Or when I load it into Coinbase to brouzouf out, they'll pull a paypal and go full retard, shit the bed, lock up my coins, and stick their thumb in their ass.

MORE THAN 10k! MORE THAN 10K! I'M HAVING AN EPISODE

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 No.49106

>>49086

Yep, you can claim it as winnings from the casinos. The IRS doesn't give a damn so long as they get their shekels.

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 No.49108

>>49106

cryptocurrency roulette

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 No.49222

>>33866

we get bored too sometimes.

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 No.49241

>>14209

the ingredients are rust and aluminum.

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 No.49244

>>49241

you need something hot to start/keep the reaction going. Those (now) cheap survival fire-starters were basically magnesium blocks. Having that finely mixed, completes the project.

Protip, break down those cheapo sparklers and mix that instead. Use one as fuse.

-SWIM

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 No.49270

>>23853

Meanwhile back at his little safe space in /leftypol/ you get derezzed for disagreeing. These faggots really are so stupid. I'm just glad their pathetic little "hey guys lets subvert /cyber/ and get them on board with communism!" attempt failed like everything they do.

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 No.50479

Back in high school (2005-6ish) I stolen a 20GB IDE HDD from a school computer. Also Use to jack the RAM (256MB PC133 RAM) from the public library. Easy to do because the systems were a Gateway All-In-One that had the RAM behind little doors with a tab to open. I replaced the sticks I took with a stick of 128MB ram. Most of the systems had 2x 256MB sticks. Would also sell them a made about $20-30 per stick.

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 No.50490

I de-googled my smartphone

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 No.50496

File: ae3487093939692⋯.jpg (54.04 KB,1153x562,1153:562,Sensation.JPG)

>>49222

trips of truth

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 No.50512

damn, this thread is old. most punk things I do involve listening to synthwave or /cyb/ tier anime soundtracks at loud volumes while doing 50mph over the limit on the highway at night. max comfy

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 No.50514

>>50512

Mind sharing some of the best one for that kind of activity?

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 No.50533

Have any other anons killed anybody?

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 No.50535

>>50533

Not yet.

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 No.50536

>>50533

Does indirectly count?

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 No.50539

I hosted an ai chat bot and turned it off.

Does that count as killing?

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 No.50544

File: 69c083175b019c4⋯.jpg (1.08 MB,1416x1397,1416:1397,booklet-cover.jpg)

File: 2d759054b97103a⋯.jpg (476.47 KB,1400x1400,1:1,Trilogy.jpg)

File: ba85ecb75938de7⋯.jpg (323.54 KB,1000x818,500:409,cover.jpg)

>>50514

>>50514

just my personal tastes but I like Lazerhawk's Redline album and Carpenter Brut's Trilogy album. on the anime soundtracks side I like to listen to the Bubblegum Crisis collection, it's got a really nice soundtrack. Bubblegum Crisis is a really nice anime as well, if you like cyberpunk shit I recommend you watch it. it's an 8 part OVA from 1988, each episode is about 45 minutes. one of my favorites.

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 No.50546

>>50539

Depends. Did your AI actively simulate emotion based on machine learning shenanigans?

If so, maybe.

If not, soykaff.

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 No.50548

>>50544

I hope you know that Bubblegum Crisis 2040 exists as well and it has like 26 episodes. Havent watched it entirely, but it's good so far

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 No.50553

>>50548

I have the entire bubblegum collection on my PC, but honestly I don't like the 2040 series much at all. I don't really like the art style, the music is nowhere near the level it was in the original, the characters look too different, and I don't like the new voice actor for Priss. I really liked Kinuko Oomori in that role. But on the whole it seems fine. The ones that are most similar to the original BGC are AD Police Files and Bubblegum Crash. Parasite dolls seems ok too. The only one I really, absolutely hate is AD Police (not police files) just because the music and characters are a huge letdown. plus it has this shitty 90s art style where the characters look genuinely retarded. I'm posting from my t40 right now so I can't screencap it.

that's just my opinion though.

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 No.50554

>>50533

t.FBI

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 No.50556

>>50539

>make a IRC bot that takes random words from recent messages and sends them back with question mark attached

>invade other people's channels with it

>measure how long it takes for people to figure it out it is a bot

Ah, good times, good times.

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 No.50654

>>26607

Yes, Hong Kong is as /cyber/ as it looks. But >>24052 is just doing cracker behavior.

>No going to monasteries to pray to god

>No comfy flats

>No realization /pol/ is right again.

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 No.50752

I've got a few stories for you to enjoy

>be American

>have god tier VPN

>be drunk

>finally willing to mention things I totally didn't do in the past

>telling you my stories that didn't happen

;)

>be 15

>hanging out with my cousin whose like a bro to me 100%

>go to local circuit city

yeah that long ago

>see HDD in security protective cable casing

>want to build desktop

>take HDD box under USGI gulf war night camo parka into bathroom

>go into stall like I need to shit

>use folding knife to cut around security measures

>slip 500GB Western Digital HDD into cargo pants pocket

>leave remains of packaging in toilet

>walk out

>go to walmart weeks later

>bro is few years older than me

>graduating high school

>want to give him a good present for grad party his parents are throwing

>go to Walmart

>see 250gb HDD external

>I already own one for storing pirated movies on

>get idea

>take product case into bathroom in back of wallfart

>enter stall

>drop pants like I'm taking a shit

>cut open case

>another person walks in

>hear walkie talkie chatter

>about someone shoplifting

>anus_clench.gif

>pannic

>take RFID tag out of package

>stealth 100

>can hear fartmart lackie pretending to use urinal

>take TP

>pretend to wipe

>be a man and just walk out after flushing RFID tag down shitter

>package in my underware

>HDD in my shirt pocket

>walk out

>delivered my bro cousin a 250GB external HDD for his grad present

>added over 200GB of pirated Adult Swim shows, some movies and about 50GB of porn pics and vid

I have more stories if you want to hear

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 No.50753

File: fe0eb56f8e286dc⋯.jpg (3.66 MB,2592x3111,864:1037,Sara_Stone_at_Exxxotica_Mi….jpg)

>>50752

I'll just add more stores and hope all you enjoy

>6 months later in high school

>working on desktop specs

>asus mobo because pleb

>4gb RAM

>3ghz AMD Phoenom Quadcore

>ATI Radeon 4850x2 crossfire

>use stolen 500GB HDD

>need space for torrented movies

>have idea involving a screw driver and school laptops

>take screw driver into math class

>teacher is clueless, but mad hot

>looks like Sara Stone, but Polish-American

>usually wears footwear that shows off her toes/ankles

<be footfag and jerked off to the idea of her multiple times

hugghhhhhhh, rawrrr

>teaches for 30 min, lets class do whatever for other 30 min

>usually brought mouse into class to play CS:1.6 or Halo:CE

>decide to take out HDD of one laptop

>"um, Miss Teacher, this laptop doesn't work"

>get another one

>take HDD out of another one

>grab 3rd laptop

>watch south park online when it was a thing for the rest of class

>intended to use the 2 HDDs to store torrented shit on from Demonoid

>only 80gb each

>useless for me

>end up buying 1TB HDD from newegg over summer

>came with 500gb HDD for free

>both HDDs I bought still in service to this day

>both stolen 80GB HDDs still in a box somewhere to this day

<still think about math teacher's rack and feet and occasionally rub one out with those thoughts to this day

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 No.50757

>>13082

I pop pills and shoot guns inna woods and pop more pills and do other stupid shit. I also stole a homeless persons can of brouzouf once.

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 No.50758

>>50757

>rouzouf

I meant money.

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 No.50764

lol 90% of the stories here are fiction

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 No.50985

>>50753

>>50752

sounds like good times, too bad this entire site is slow as hell.

><still think about math teacher's rack and feet and occasionally rub one out with those thoughts to this day

based.

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 No.51292

>>50753

oh the joys of being in school and getting to stare at your teachers feet. such innocent days!

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 No.51293

this board is shit and full of shazbot cucks

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 No.51315

ive been in prison in 3 states and caused a cop to total his car during a chase

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 No.51316

>>50753

>500gb

shit, i had to uninstall DOOM2 to install win95 on my 100mb hdd

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 No.51319

I lost $100 today.

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 No.51373

>>50764

Some of them are a bit ridiculous but most of them aren't that unbelievable. Hell I did some student gov shit similar to what that patrick bateman kid did in high school.

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 No.51374

File: 703e93fecc1b97c⋯.jpg (412.98 KB,768x1024,3:4,anonymous_according_to_the….jpg)

If you were to join the IT dep't at a university (as a student job) what sort of shit would you do? I'm hoping to get a job with IT because of course I'll be paid, but also I'll probably have access to all the old technology they might be getting rid of.

I read stories online all the time about anons abusing their IT positions, but it seems like I'm too late to start a buttcoin or ethereum farm. It sure would be nice to supplement my income.

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 No.51388

>>13132

I hope you understand how big piece of shit are you and accept it or become an hero.

For me me both way are same,nothing will change if you stay or gone, even if your whole story just imaginary.

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 No.51389

I've ran about £800 worth of steroids paid for with crypto that cost me literally nothing and I compete in a "drug free" sport federation (and have passed drug tests despite being on at the time).

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 No.51392

>>51374

Olympic lifter or powerlifter?

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 No.51393

>>51389

>>51392

Sorry meant for you

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 No.51576

>>49086

Thanks anon.

This actually was the easy way.

I don't want to go into a ton of detail, but the TL;DR is I transferred them into a fairly well regulated BTC related business and promptly changed them to cash, paying a fee along the way.

They took my ID and reported it to the IRS.

I then filled out a tax form for capital gains taxes.

End result I have a very nice nest egg, conservatively invested in 80% stock ETFs and 20% bond ETFs giving a decent and steady return. I also stashed enough gold and silver to trade my way out of the country in a safe deposit box somewhere and prepaid the fees for a few decades.

I can't retire permanently right now - health insurance is like 500 a month.

But if I live conservatively I can grow the nest egg and probably retire within 10 years here in the 1st world.

Right now I'm in Vegas. I was a bit of a fat slob so I've been working out every day, reading/working on projects, then playing poker in afternoons/evenings.

It's a very schway skill poker, I'm not perfect but I feel confident I can make a little weed brouzouf for sure.

When my lease ends I'll probably do the digital nomad thing for a few years, see the world. China, Russia, India, South America, Africa etc, spread over 2-3 years.

It's up in the air. Macau for sure. Will probably start in Tokyo, head to thailand and play it by ear…

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 No.51608

>>51576

Where did you learn about stocks and shit? Seems all the genuinely wealthy people do it but I don't know where to start.

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 No.51634

>>51608

The four pillars of investing is a good book. Check out /r/personalfinance's wiki too for more resources.

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 No.51640

>>13377

Is that why phones are even more crummily designed these days? I know there had to be some reason everything was being dumbed down besides appealing to the Chinese.

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 No.51646

>>51634

Thanks.

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 No.54235

>>13082

I have a 4 year old rooted android which is all beat up, the screen is all scratched from use and the unlock button fell off a long time ago so the only way to unlock it is using the proximity sensor.

I once got so fuarked up on benzos that I peed in a high-class mall, hiding from guards and that was the last thing i remembered after waking up in a hotel room.

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 No.57793

>tfw I come back and this board is still around

>>51316

I'm definitely younger than a lot of people here.

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 No.57795

came in a public restroom soap bottle, closed for 6 months with a lock on it at all times

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 No.57806

>>13082

There was a time when I was in need to shoplift food at the supermarket in order to eat well, I bought with brouzouf the most bulky food and hide the small high calories ones.

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 No.57818

hmm

>begged for my laptop, stole usb drives, its a hell of a laptop tho

>stole lorazepam from my step mother

>started doing amphetamines at 14

>stole weed and shrooms from my uncle

>stole from a local store about 40 times until being caught cause the only place they gave a shit about was the tech aisle

>stole a beige box from some rando

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 No.57834

churn and burn instagram/twitter/tik tok accounts

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 No.57842

I remember posting in this thread when I was in high school from the IBM T40 I stole from the ewaste. good times.

I miss being 18. everything sucks now.

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 No.57843

>>57818

>6 lines

>5 instances of "stole

B L A C K D E T E C T E D

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 No.57997

File: 382d234033bbb9c⋯.jpg (81.64 KB,639x517,639:517,5307973280_00d401f7ea_z.jpg)

>>23948

>>23948

>What really matters in an effective weapon is penetration

Only if you couldn't reach that point before.If you can reach penetration the following effects become the most important a clear through bullet wound deals less damage than a shrapnel that is tumbling

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 No.58128

the most hight-tech and low-life thing I did was installing on malware on unsecured computer at the local tech shop that plays religious song and shows offensive pictures of John Paul 2… twice

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 No.58132

if ya corpfags never woke up in the middle of desert while being coked out ya don' know what life is…

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 No.58156

>>58132

I know what is life but I don't know what is love…

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 No.58157

>>57843

stealing is punk

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