Desperately I held my asshole expecting a mega shit. It wasn't gonna be the routine poo. It was gonna be the big one. I've been waiting a few days since July 4th expecting it to come. I worshipped it by eating a few hot dogs here and a few hamburgers there to garuntee the second coming of the turd. I sat on the toilet thinking my life story and what I've done to deserve such a fate. The shit came out. It came out like storm water breaking a window open with ass skin all over the toilet. The toilet was nearly filled and I aimed my asspipe to the shower expecting a mega horse shit showdown. It came down and as the thunder clapped my ass stopped shitting and I started spraying pee for at least a minute. The battle finished by me and my friend taking a shovel to shovel the shit into bags to set on fire and chuck at buildings. The very next day the news reported the mysterious disappearance of several historical buildings. Several businesses like JP Morgan have invested in building new migrant shelters and set a reward up to $2,500 to the man or woman that burned down the property for reuse.