>>723347
Anon, I feel your pain, what helped me was this:
Go to a normie Christian forum and ask openly if anyone would like to act as your penpal Sister/Mother/Father,etc
Chances are there will be a lonely childless older Christian lady/father there that would love to spark a platonic friendship with you and act as a parent, but you must NEVER try to sexualize the relationship if its someone of the opposite sex.
I don't have any sisters nor a good connection with my mother, so I did a similar thing to this, and to this day she acts as a close confidant and very good friend, she knows how much I love her calling me a "little brother" as it makes me feel loved and appreciated, so she does it a lot when I am feeling down. In not having a family, we can have a new family through Jesus Christ, this is what I did to manage my depression. So ever since she decided to act as an older sister/mother to me, I have been able to maintain a very disciplined life and contain my depression. My depression is not completely gone, I don't think it can go completely away in this life, but I am managing it very effectively.
Remember what God said when he made man "It is not good for man to be alone", ask God to send you a close confidant/guardian/friend. Don't become too attached to romantic love, for it is more often than not the most superficial kind of love.
So try to find a new family through Jesus Christ, and then address it with lots of patience. For instance, I am weary of becoming too dependent on my confidant, so the time we spend not corresponding makes me more appreciate the days where we actually talk, and I become even more grateful to God that he had sent her to me. Once you find someone that can act as a mother/father/sister/brother, then you must learn to apply patience to that friendship, and in time perhaps you will come to a point where you can actually start a relationship with someone through the love you now feel.