/ausneets/ - Aus NEETs

Boongs Rule

>>164905

I'd like to do that, but I want to go to the gym and cook breakfast in the morning, and still get to work by 6:30.

>>164900

Why haven't I thought of using this pepe before?

>>164908

Thank you.

>>164910

Pretty evil tbh

Terrible pepe

>>164913

I'm surprised it hasn't been used.

>>164914

No. Thank you.

Kind posts confuse me at the moment.

I'm going to go watch The Bible, I'm up to Jesus.

>>164919

Delet this >>164920 before you go.

>>164912

I used to hate Sunday nights when I was a wagie and what it meant, another week of torment fo me

>>164920

Ban him!!!!

>>164912

Same here, and I'm kind of panicing as the day fades and I haven't done much productive things.

>>164920

Evil NEETs out in force.

Seriously though, how many times have you wanked to that?

>>164920

I think I understand.

That represents the NEET that was and you are getting rid of that to bring forth a new undefiled one.

>>164923

She said yes before she died.

>>164921

It's spoilered.

That's how you know he is the kind and humble NEET.

>>164929

You're a disgusting cunt. Watch it. I use two hands with my hammer.

>>164929

That's not a knife

Escaped from the normie shopping center alive

>>164933

what did you buy?

>>164934

Nothing particularly interesting. Mainly fruit, milk, bread, some snags and monster zero

>>164925

Don't know, I just run my dick rotten to it

>>164935

you should buy a belt buckle, i have been thinking about buying a belt buckle recently you should get one as well.

>>164937

My current belt already has a buckle

>>164937

I use an old USB cable as a belt

>>164939

If it's not a female to female cable you might be a homo

>>164938

you should get this one http://www.williamvalentine.com.au/shop/belt-buckles/eureka-stockade-buckle/

>>164940

I know my USB belt lingo I wouldn't make that mistake

I had a friend who's belt broke and he needed to go home so he just used a coles plastic shopping bag as a belt, he tried pretty hard to hide it on the bus ride home

>>164943

Imagine trying to do that with one of the new 15c bags

>Tfw critically gooned

>>164945

Sounds like a nightmare task. You can give them all the best advice but they'll probably still eat dumb shit all the time and miscount calories.

Time for a wank

>>164945

>Neeta

>>164945

>Neeta C

Is one of our executives wishing to downgrade to skele status now?

>>164951

at least it's not that dancing skeleton guy

>>164951

They all have that pattern of balding.

Aldi's honey soy chicken chips are better than their sweet chili and sour cream ones.

>>164955

I wonder what Craig's real life is like

>>164956

i would watch that show

>>164957

It makes me want another season of struggle street

Someone should email the Gen to Dan Murphy's corporate contact

>>164959

NEET General #220 - Cease and Desist Edition

>>164956

He's middle aged and extremely bitter that he got knocked back for a job by dans and had to work at liquorland for minimum wage and only lost his virginity to a hooker when he was 30.

He lives in a sharehouse with two Pakistanis and spend his free time plotting against dan and trying to influence neets to come to his store

>>164964

I've always been a centrist on the dan question

>>164965

That's a busy bedside table

>>164961

>lost his virginity to a hooker when he was 30

Slander, pure slander. Craig lost his virginity when he was only 29 and 364 days old. The part about her being a hooker is technically true. And she was a gook. And overweight. And, if you want to get really technical, born a man, and still waiting for that sex change surgery. And looked nothing like her photo on the internet. But Craig reckons he's still doing better than most the losers on /ausneets/.

>>164969

>Gook

There aren't gooks in Mildura though, it would of been a boong

>>164969

>giving up certain wizard powers in order to bring the goon to the people

what a man

>>164668

>She had sex with some guy after breaking up with cheesecake. Orbiting seems undignified at this point.

Can the NEET which posted this provide any other info, or at least some proof?

>>164973

I think the person who posted it was just being malicious.

>>164972

no offence but you dad sounds like a fuck head

>>164974

No, unfortunately I was being honest.

Worlds hardest poo

>>164977

worlds softest rapist

>>164977

Cannot wait for No Poo November

>>164979

I thought it was No (You) November

>>164980

same thing in your case, pajeet

>>164970

There are lots of gooks there.

Should I take a NEET girl out to an all-you-eat dumpling place, pay for everything?

Also I need to find a NEET girl to do this.

>gooks

>chinks

>gooks

>gooks

>gooks

Why do you insist on talking like a toothless meth bogan? I presume you wouldn't use the word 'gook' IRL and even if you would, take stock in the way you come across for gods sake.

>>164984

>gods sake

How uncouth

>>164983

Don't bother, they will just dump you for a bullshit reason anyway.

>>164988

she looks like a tranny

>>164987

cheesey?

>>164989

Exceptionally poor taste

>>164984

It's funny

>>164988

>still believing in the gf meme

>>164991

I didn't say it was a bad thing

>>164994

Even worse taste

>>164996

>implying NAWALT

>>164987

All the same, if you're willing to slap on a dress, wig and some makeup, I'll take you out for a fun night of dumplings, drinks and Myki but at the end, we're going back to my place and I'm fucking you and if you're sweet on me, I'll give you a reach around, I'm not unkind.

White dogs

black cogs

Molest

Bum fart

>>164998

What if it’s Weber and he doesn’t stop eating and drinking and you can’t leave the restaurant?

Cunt fart

>>164984

Or just expand your list of racial slurs.

>>165003

As soon as it hits 10pm, I pull my pants down and just go to town and run till the morning breaks.

I don't give a shit, somebody gets meat in their mouth and I'm putting meat in somebody.

Good night esteemed neet friends

==RAGEY WAGEY GETTING CAGEY=

>>164965

the dexies are going to turn you into a skele

>>165012

im calling in sick tommorow

>>165014

I'll dob you in dog

>>164984

t. Xing Li.

anyone itt

>>165017

Yes mate

Alright NEETs it's high time to go to bed, but this time at a civilised hour. Night Night NEETs

Morning dole bludgers

morning shit-munching faggots

>>165012

2deep4me

Another day to achieve those goals NEETs

>>165027

NEET gang!

Elephant on my crocodile

Woke up to fairly wild weather.

Our quiet little state would appreciate it if Qld kept their storms to themselves.

>>165031

Ask him to show you his titties.

>>165031

Did your dad suck you off as thanks?

GOOD MORNING NEEEETS

how are you?

I didn’t tell you but I got a job a couple of weeks ago. Tbh it’s so good it doesn’t even feel like work. It’s at the local camera place, retail. But yeah all I do is talk shit about cameras to customers. Take passport pics and hang out. Man and so many qts come in and have a flirt. Yesterday this thot with yuge titttes came in and I took her passport pic and nearly kept the pic cos of them tits.

Anyway I got to go to my cenno angency this morning. Imma tell them I just got the job because I want to still get one last payment.

What u doing today neet?

>>165018

>his wife’s sons

Lel

>>165036

Good work mate, how many hours?

>>165036

>I didn’t tell you but I got a job a couple of weeks ago.

The Council knew.

>>165039

The Council knows all.

This week I'm going to make a concerted effort to drive responsibly and save on fuel

40 minutes at the wagery.

I've finished my coffee and read some news articles. Taking my first paid poop before heading back for some more inbox refreshing.

>>165045

take your time paid toilets are the best

I called in sick bros

I love to patronise Japanese lunch joints and flirt with awkward Japanese qts

>>165047

Goon before noon?

>>165049

dont drink and drive

>>165048

Too bad you have to eat their shit raw food to do so.

work is boring

>tfw severely depressed

>>165054

take a xanny

>>165054

Look at the bright side, that means you're scarcely happy.

>>165051

chicken katsu is the best thing to order at Japanese restaurants

>>165058

KFC is better

>>165051

you know what eats raw salmon?

bears, orcas and fucking sharks mate. RAW NATTY FOOD will make you a RAW NATTY BEAST. That's why the japanese could rape over 6 million chinese in Nanking in a few days

>>165060

top bantz

>>165061

I was going to tell him to stop being silly but the post has grown on me

>>165060

Rape of Nanking pales in comparison to the Rape of NeetKing

>>165063

kek

Alarm clock beeping

Wagecucks weeping

Time for floor sweeping

And burger fIipping

While NEETs are still sleeping

Put on your slave collar

Each hour you earn a dollar

Your dignity level grows ever smaller

Better run fast when customers holler

While the NEET is being a baller

Any plans for the day?

Boss makes a dollar

I make a dime

That's why we shit

On company time

Black Science Man

Got given a degree and a job because he's black

Black Science Man

Sheeeeeeeeeeeit

I think the NEET who recorded the NEET Gang (Pepe On My Wrist) song needs to put the fragments of Black Science Man together and record them for us.

>>165068

I have an appoimtment with my psychologist, then I will be dropping in to see Dan on the way home, that is all I have planed for the entire week

>>165073

have you been tell your psychologist about us?

>>165074

I bet he has.

I bet his psych went out and purchased a weber kettle.

>>165074

I'd appreciate you acting as though I'm not here. The feeling of being supervised can interrupt the treatment process.

Thanks

Jordan

>>165076

Wash your penis.

>>165077

I gave you a clear instruction, bucko

>>165074

nothing specific about what sites just that i post to some discussion boards

>>165079

well, tell him i am going well.

who is rapeNEET

*YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWN*

Oh hey there wagecuck. Halfway through the week, hopefully you don’t have another breakdown before your designated recreational time at the end of the week.

Me? Well life isn’t easy being a NEETgod, right now I’m stuck deciding what I’m going to do with all time today. Hey! Maybe you can help me choose! I’ve narrowed it down to a few options:

- Play a round of golf (beat my country clubs record last week!)

- Learn a new field of science

- Write and record a new symphony

- Fuck my wageslave neighbours girlfriend

- Take my Ferrari for a spin

- Or perhaps just chill out with a nice book

This will be the closest you get to actually being free, by living through me.

Have a strong craving to get gooned, lie around on my beanbag and watch stupid documentaries on the supernatural all morning. How do I resist neetbros?

>>165086

Give yourself a task that precludes the possibility of getting gooned, at least before you complete it.

I usually organize a drive to pick up mummy from work at 6PM and tell her I'm making a nice dinner so the earliest I can drink is 9PM when I've finished doing the dishes.

>>165085

psych's usually don't judge you or condemn your bad behaviour, which is one reason why they're so fucking useless

>tfw racist but still have yellow fever

>>165088

I assume he was taking a compassionate view of my behavior and understood why I was making such a silly decision. That was the feeling I got, I really liked that guy actually. He was very insightful but I haven't seen him in the past year, I should make another free appointment.

fuck now I have jungle fever too

I am deeply sick

>>165089

That's why rape was invented.

>>165089

the biggest problem is people who marry SEA monkeys

>>165089

We're right there with you bro. Look at it this way - if you impregnate her, you'll be making her race a bit whiter and making more elliot rogers

>>165094

nothing wrong with elliot rogers besides that he was a whiny little bitch. im 22 and i haven't kiss a girl and im not going to go on a shooting rampage.

>>165097

That never happens with Michael Bay films.

>>165099

I should not have clicked on that link, the image of MadB will be forever etched into my mind

4 more wagie hours

24 degrees today in Shitbourne, going to try and be productive

3 more wagie hours

are you guys comfy?

>>165104

I just woke up

>>165106

sounds like you had a productive day.

What dating sites are not shit?

>>165096

But your thinking about it

>>165108

Daterape.com.au

Starimg at outlook while I bend a staple and wonder how I ended up here

>tfw depressed

>>165111

weak, dumb wagie scum

>>165113

work shy, faggot guy

hueNEET: are Brazil nuts called Brazil nuts in Brazil?

Personally I call them nigger toes.

>>165117

I have half a dozen chipolatas in the pan. Got 2 eggs and about 200g bacon to go with it. And some thick cut toast.

>>165118

That guy didn't get a government grant to be a faggot.

>>165120

tranny deeds done dan cheep

ded

>>165122

debbie

kek

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jakob_Fugger

>>165124

What are we actually laughing at?

>>165124

Fug

>>165126

There's 4 Fuggers in Australia: https://pericles.ipaustralia.gov.au/atmoss/Falcon_Search_Tools.Main?pSearch=Surname&pWord=fugger&pCommand=Search

>>165127

This used to list at least one Fuck, but seems to have disappeared in recent times.

>>165128

There are 3 Boongs however.

>>165127

Dikshit returns no results, which means they're filtering strings containing obscenities. Dikshit is a somewhat common pajeet surname.

>>165129

9 Abbos

>>165135

https://pericles.ipaustralia.gov.au/atmoss/Falcon_Search_Tools.Main?pSearch=Surname&pWord=vaglica&pCommand=Search

https://pericles.ipaustralia.gov.au/atmoss/Falcon_Search_Tools.Main?pSearch=Surname&pWord=*penis*&pCommand=Search

They should correlate surname counts with suicide

There's 8 people with the surname NEET

>>165136

https://pericles.ipaustralia.gov.au/atmoss/Falcon_Search_Tools.Main?pSearch=Surname&pWord=nig*&pCommand=Search

>>165140

Mate, no!

>>164941

I was at the Victoria street markets yesterday and I saw this buckle. When I went to go back and I buy it their store had been closed. Weird you typed this a few hours after I tried to buy it

>>165140

you're one stylish NEET, do you work for the Mob

>>165141

All my rental applications we're rejected and traffic was fucked and I had to fill up with petrol and work was a nightmare, it was all just too much. I regret it already

>>165145

On the reverse I had a good day, in fact I didn't have a house inspection i thought I was gunna, but yeah ifg you neets need a shit studio to saty a night in

>>165147

>going to start eating one meal a day

I feel that's going to result in binging, best to have two smaller meals and one bigger meal.

>>165148

I'm going to give it a go and if it ends being binging then I'll stop. The idea is one plate of mostly meat with greens and a small amount of pasta/potato and then two pieces of fruit as dessert.

>>165147

>one big meal

as someone who does that

Very bad idea, saps your energy

fucking ningins

>>165151

That'd last me 5 meals.

>>165153

skele

>>165145

There's always tomorrow I guess.

>>165147

Onya, mate. As others have said, there are some downsides to the one meal a day thing, but if it gets you going, that's good.

>>165145

m8 don't worry about it, just think about why you wanted to give up the smokes in the first place, it's a simple setback we all have those, just get back up when your ready and try again

Starting to feel nervous about my first banjo lesson tomorrow night.

Partly being taught my a not-entirely-unattractive girl who is almost young enough to be my daughter.

Partly because it's a group lesson and there will almost certainly be one man with an over-the-top personality who I'll clash with.

>>165158

Tell him to have a goon if you clash with him.

>>165158

m8 if he gets smart just punch him in the face and tell him to shut the fuck up

>>165161

Jesus Christ, Monk. Might as well smash a slab while you're at it.

>>165161

You earned it m8.

>>165161

based

Had a dare double espresso yesterday when I was hungover and it mixed really bad with the dexies, was drinking decaff coffee today at work but I thought I was gonna fall asleep so I drank half a coffee which didn't make me sick.

Coffee is a serious addiction

>>165161

I almost bought a streetwise feast on the way home but realised I wasn't hungry

>>165166

Did you at least buy some goon?

>>165157

She'll be right. Just taking the night off from the to-do list and havnig a good ol alcohol free goon sesh time relaxin. Back at it tomorrow.

>>165162

I don't eat that shit.

>>165165

Have an emu

Pluck a duck, pluck a duck

Not a chicken

Or a cow

Pluck a duck

That's him right now!

Could fuckin go a few cold tinnies neets

>>165171

You earned it, do it.

>>165171

leave em alone m8, you don't need em, you will feel better and sleep better without them

>>165165

what are dexies

>t. reatrded out of the normal knowlegsge neet

>>165174

dexamphetamine

>>165175

is it a prescription?

>>165176

r u serious?

>>165173

He's earned them after a hard day of waging.

>>165178

yeah and they will make him feel worse

>>165167

No, might get some emus tomorrow thou after work

>>165179

He can always drink away the pain tomorrow.

That Bruichladdich is a nice drop.

>>165182

Sorry Dan, I will make it up to you , I will buy extra goon and jerky tomorrow

>>165184

$5 is all they're worth tbh

>>165177

yes

>>165182

Dan I willl purge the Mildura Menace known as craig

>>165176

No I make it myself in the goon lab

>>165188

How do we know where he is from?

>>165176

They're highly restricted, the pharmacist has to keep them in a vault etc, so yes.

>>165192

Insane in the membrain

Gone insane

Got no brain

>>165192

Cough like crazy?

>>165191

oh no, there is going to be a goon war, no one will come out a winner in this one

>>165197

Cone coughs are the best coughs!

I just want to take a hot shower, but all this rainy weather has made my solar hot water system ineffective.

By the way that's 1868CC's

>>165200

Has he got a good brain bucket?

>>165200

Noice

>Got new exhaust and changed the shitty looking tail flap where the no plate goes.

First two things I did to my bike too.

>>165202

Average looking one. He had a superbike, some fuicking suzuki think that was like 600cc's and he didn't die on that so he should be ok.

The harley has 6 gears and if you get to 3rd you are breaking the law.

>>165204

Probably a GSX-R600, a lot quicker than the bigboi Harley.

>>165200

Be hard to rape someone on that thing

>>165203

He's sort of mates with the guy who owns the Harley dealership so he did it for free. He would've done it anyway.

The vance and hines exhaust looks pretty swanky now.

>>165206

You would need an electric bike that's nice and quiet to commit your rapes.

>>165140

Is that a cigarillo? I thought you had moved out of the warehouse also?

>>165182

I might come to see buy a $50 bottle of Scotch off you when my bux come in Dan

>>165207

Yeah dealers will usually offer you an exhaust and tail tidy kit, good that he got it free.

>>165208

No, we decided it needed to be near the ocean so we could get our Nuclear sub in there

>>165205

I'm not sure what it is, I don't know much about bikes.

He was showing me the marks on the sides of the tyre because he's still riding the harley like a superbike.

>>165212

That only works at your local asian supermarket

you have to be asian to

>>165212

OMG JUST STALKED HER FB ACC, SHE HAS 5 KIDS AND WORKS 3 JOB ALREADY?!?!

>>165217

I can't even picture it sitting on that angle.

>>165217

But I want you to become a big, big boi?

>>165218

You have to ride like this

>>165220

Could be closer to the road tbh

>>165221

Easy af

>>165221

want a chico roll now

>>165221

I'd never touched a bike before I started and I'm chronically uncoordinated. Besides racing into the distance by accident the first time I started the bike and almost crashing, it went fine and I got the approval to take the license test which I let lapse

>>165212

Have you tried fucking the sheep?

>>165221

They teach you everything, it's a two day course, first day they will teach you the basics, then the 2nd day you ride around and learn safety stuff, no one in the class failed.

>>165221

if my 5'4" 90 pound friend can get it you can

>>165226

absolute gross ya mong, even crutched they are fucking unappealing

>>165229

i'm fly blown

>>165220

Jesus Christ

>>165190

because reverse imagesearch finds that that picture is from the 15th street Coles in Mildura opening day in 2013

>>165232

Mildy has 15 streets? Woah

>>165231

Yeah it's pretty crazy, and extremely dangerous, the guy in the video now only has one kidney.

>>165235

Dan's poisons get everybody in the end.

NEETs got an uncontrollable urrrrge

>>165235

I feel a bit out of breath just from watching it. I'm glad he had that minute or so at the end where he just cruised. That's why I like yours, yours are a bit hectic here and there but I can keep my cool and not feel like I'm about to watch someone top them selves.

>>165233

kek

>>165238

I only give it a bit of throttle when I feel it is safe to do so, also I'm paranoid about police.

This guy is by far the worst.

>>165238

Do you have anxiety issues?

>>165241

No one here has anxiety issues.

yeah nah shit gay unna

My anger has turned from self-destruction to outward action. I'm not quite sure this is a good thing, its showing good early results but maybe long term it will be a negative impact.

>>165240

The last three minutes were mental. My eyes hurt from focusing too hard through the little windscreen.

I'm going to go eat nuggets and watch Jesus.

fuck me I have to wait til Friday for Soul Calibur 6

>>165247

I will part from my vidya only in death, pagan

10pm already

the wagery beckons

>>165252

I Didint think people still drank that stuff, I used to drink it sometimes in HS because my dad drank it and it looked fancy, then I discovered export and realised what a real man's beer was

>>165259

We wasted it bro

>>165261

>tfw spent a few hours on the weekend playing TF2 and looking at photos of everyone in high school in the 2008-2010 era with 2008-2010 haircuts and clothes.

>>165262

Fuck me mate

Don't think I could handle having a real good look back

>>165263

It definitely hits home, it is like a completely different era to today. Everyone looked so young, I couldn't even tell you what any more than a handful of people from my high school are up to now.

I miss those days, everything is just so boring. There needs to be more to life than drifting between being a slave at work and a slave stuck at home as a shut in all day.

I applied a few of my childhood games on Miniclip and GTA IV and nearly had a spergout, what the fuck have I made of my life. The thing is I don't even know what I want and how to make things exciting and fun again, how much of my flatlined mindset is actually due to my circumstances and how much is just due to getting older and growing up and being an adult?

I miss how fresh everything use to feel.

fitNEET with kickboxing experience, too agro to join our aus army was kicked out before bindoon graduation, should i give the french foreign legion a shot? theyll put me in line, literally cannot work a 9-5 ill die fuck this pozzed country

>>165264

>GTA IV

I played so many hours online with my bros in year 9-10. I'm at a loss. All I can say is that you lose the 'magic' of youth and things can drowned out by responsibilities and the anxieties of being an adult.

>There needs to be more to life than drifting between being a slave at work and a slave stuck at home as a shut in all day.

I don't know what to do about it. All I got is working towards being less of a piece of shit each day. Going to write a list of things to do tomorrow.

>>165265

Sure but maybe explore a few other options first.

>>165259

Nigga there are kiddies who were born after black ops 1 came out, saying it was good.

What actually happens if you show up to hospital having a mental crisis or feeling suicidal?

>>165268

I believe they take your personal effects and anything you might harm yourself with, notify a friend or family member and put you up in a bed