>>8134
>I've been thinking of printing out "business cards" that say "Mommy Masseur" with my phone number on it and then head over to them and try to pitch them my "services", make home visits while kids and husband are away and fuck them hard.
There is a lot wrong with this.
>"Mommy Masseur"
First off, that on its own screams autism. A business card with that written on it would instantly give you some odd stares, or some confused looks if you're lucky.
Next, no matter what the so-called "business card" name is, your plan is already faulty and makes you look, in one word, not good.
>noticed the moms of the kids that run around in the playground right next to where i work out have been checking me out
Sure, you may be buff or whatever, but that doesn't automatically make them want or be willing to fuck you. Admiring someone's muscles doesn't instantly mean "ah yeah hot stud i wanna fuck unga bunga", you turbo autist.
Perhaps it's not everyday that you see a muscular/fit person, but that doesn't mean they would bang you, especially with those simple, primitive-minded thoughts that ape-brain of yours comes up with.
Frankly, it also makes you look narcissistic and as thirsty as a stray dog.
>try to pitch them my "services", make home visits while kids and husband are away and fuck them hard.
I suspect that you're one of those assholes that read NTR manga and dreams of being the guy banging some other guy's wife solely to satisfy your own weak ego rather than because you appreciate ara ara-type women/mommies. Since this is a board that appreciates MILFs.
As one anon already mentioned, making business cards to advertise your type of plan makes you look disgusting. I know that almost no one is pure enough to judge someone, however, wanting to be (or already being) a home wrecker makes you look vile and inconsiderate to any relatively normal adult whose thoughts and decision-making skills are mature, no matter their sexual preferences.
More off note, but how old are you anyway? Last time I heard of an idea similar to that was shortly after I graduated high school, and it was from some known dickhead of a kid that spent his time mostly watching porn, would talk about the porn he watched with anyone he became acquainted with and would probably fuck anything he could get his hands on.
Forgive me for the wall of text I wrote, but this is one of the times when some trashbag really makes me think.
Anyway OP, your plan is not solid, and it makes you appear like a socially awkward, nasty and pathetic piece of shit.
I seriously hope that your thread is just a mere shitpost, and not an actual idea.