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File: d57fce7d343c68c⋯.jpeg (184.36 KB, 640x569, 640:569, 3FF144F9-6DDA-4CBD-A0CA-1….jpeg)

 No.51980

Hello /x/. This is my first time posting. I’ve been stuck in a cycle of obsession for over a month now (I have diagnosed OCD, so that makes it 10x worse). I’m not going to go into much detail because it’s more of a /pol/ thing.

Anyway, about 2 months ago, I decided what I wanted to do with my life. It started off as a simple dream, and things seemed like the couldn’t be any more perfect. Then I started researching, and reading articles related to the subject. It sent me in a downward spiral, because my dream and the world around me seemed to be falling apart. After 22 years of life, I found my true purpose, and within a matter of days, my hope began to get stripped away. My simple dream had tuned into an obsession that nearly ruined my life, and probably shaved a few years off. It got so bad, that for a month, I woke up at noon, got up, got on my couch, ate lunch, researched for 2-3 hours, fell asleep, woke up an hour later, got my clothes on, researched more, got up, walked outside to get some exercise, came back in (~5 by now), more reading till about 7, walk around for an hour or so, and think out loud (sometimes talking to myself), get on computer, try to relax but can’t, so I put on music, and read more, get off computer at 1am, go to bed, research more till 5-6am, sleep. Next day, the cycle starts over. I lost ~12 lbs last month from worrying myself. I’m avoiding reading about the subject, and to disprove everything to myself, so it’s getting better.

The simple dream I once had extended into politics. I said “I’m not going to see my perfect dream degrade into Hell. If no one’s going to do anything about it, then at least I can say I tried.” It’s a dream that involves foreign politics, language, and me being out of place. I have a few people who support me, but so many others say that there’s no way that I could do it. The way I see it is there’s a small pinhole of light at the end of a long, dark tunnel. It’s not much light, but it beats the dark.

I’m sorry for my life story, but I just wanted to explain my situation, and express how much I want this. It’s like a very powerful, supernatural force is pulling me to my dream, and I just can’t explain the feeling. It’s like destiny. I want to achieve this dream of mine, and I’ve prayed to God, but my heart isn’t in the right place. I want to know how I can get advice or guidance through supernatural means.

>pic related is the closest thing I have to a pic related.

____________________________
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 No.51986

>advice or guidance

Meditation. Say a mantra, stare at a sigil, visualize your Higher Self. Whoever you want to ask: they already know and if they want to help you they're already looking for ways to communicate to you. most likely they are already communicating to you, but it's hard to open yourself to, accept, and understand messages of that kind I know this may sound nuts even for /x/ standards, but genuinely try to connect with nature. From personal experience I can tell you that anything spiritual-related is multiplied greatly in force and effect when done in nature. I opened my chakras in one night almost instantly on a bench in a forest, after weeks of trying the same at home with not nearly the same results. Rivers, trees, caves, waterfalls, etc. Light a candle or place a flower pot next to you. These are all gateways to presence energy.

Then go into trance via meditation or drugs of any kind, I don't judge and think of your intent, hold it in your mind and imagine the answer you need to already have been told to you. Ask the question you want answered once you feel like you made a connection and be patient with the answer. It may come immediately in the form of images, sounds, smells, feelings, words, impressions, or the answer may come later in dreams or often unrelated conversations with your peers. Keep up a regular practice of some kind of meditation (there are so many so you can easily pick one and stick to that) and keep a journal to record stuff, no matter how minute or insignificant it may seem. Shit works yo. Just know that whatever forces you align yourself with, they'll be happy you joined them and will help out wherever they can. Remember that they are very wise and ancient so be humble, but not to the point of submission. Most likely, they want a master and not a slave, and they will teach you to be a master.

>pic related

Ah yes. The old "summoning satan to do your homework" clichée. Classic. That's the problem with coercive "white magic" "in the fifty names of god I compel thee" type demonolatry. Very few spirits enjoy coercion and some may fuck you up just out of spite. it probably serves their purpose to fuck you up, but who knows, maybe they just want to enjoy themselves, multi-dimensional beings have multi-dimensional goals, making it a headache to think about

Just trust yourself to have found the right one for you, and trust that they see it the same way and you should be gucci.

One more point: don't let yourself become obsessed. The best remedy against obsession is grounding. Keep up with friends and family regularly. Practice hobbies that deal either with your own body (sports, yoga, hiking, walking), or the physical reality we live in (physics, technology, biology, political or comedic or thrilling entertainment). You can also regularly walk barefoot on grass to instantly ground you. Learn to cook, or draw, or play music, or write. Remember that you are always both spiritual and physical. Too much spirituality at the cost of physicality, and you'll end up like some hindu untouchable bathing in a shitfilled river. Too much physicality and you'll end up deterministic and depressed.

Trust yourself, and trust that whatever grand dream you have, it can be achieved and in a very real sense it will be achieved. If you're a bibleman, remember the following: they will listen, but will not hear, and they will look, but will not see

Know that, merely by virtue of you studying these topics, and asking about them, you are already way ahead of the curve of western civilization. The future belongs to truth and freedom and anyone telling you otherwise is either an npc or trying to turn you into one. Don't let them. Have faith in your self.

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 No.52003

>>51986

>Meditation. Say a mantra, stare at a sigil

I’d be going into this completely blind. I’ve never done this stuff before.

>connect with nature, Then go into trance via meditation

I think I can manage that. lol

>demonolatry. Very few spirits enjoy coercion and some may fuck you up just out of spite

Yeah, I want the most serious, not fuckery contact as possible. That’s the problem with demons. Ive heard a lot of shit about how they fuck you to the point where people basically go insane. Closest I’d ever been to one is praying to whatever would listen, pleading for help. One night a little girl in a white dress, long black hair, and dark void for a face manifested in my room. Even my dad saw her staring at him in his doorway. I don’t wanna fuck with that shit again. I want real advice, guidance, and help with achieving my goals. Like I said. No fuckery, if I want it to leave, then it’ll leave. No tricks or games.

>Trust yourself

I do, but at the same time, I question myself, and look for validation from others that my ideals will work. I don’t want to hurt anyone, but my ideals are not the most pure. I wonder if the spirit, or whatever I want help from would see things on the same level and understand my goals I wish to accomplish.

Speaking of seals, meditation and mantra; where do I even start this stuff? Like I said, I want advice, and guidance. Like directions on a path of success to accomplish things no one would’ve ever thought possible. However, again; I don’t want to be permanently bonded with some entity that’s going to fuck with my mind, drive me deeper into depression, and take over my life. When I want out, I want to be able to get out.

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 No.52005

File: 5bd3b7507ac09aa⋯.png (63.85 KB, 205x207, 205:207, Never 5give, Never 5get.png)

skimming your post, you sound like a spastic. You do not need to be anywhere near the occult, your mind is pretty fucked up already.

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 No.52013

>I’ve been stuck in a cycle of obsession for over a month now. I’m not going to go into much detail because it’s more of a /pol/ thing

So it's what? Something about vampires or some idiocy about the "white race", then?

Just get the fuck off of /pol/, or possibly the internet in whole, for a time of a few weeks or so. Destroy your computer if you have to. You literally need to detox. Find something else to occupy your time, and then maybe when you come back you'll realize how utterly retarded everything they say there is, and how completely unimportant it is.

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 No.52014

>>52013

>word filters

Each a bundle of buckshot traveling the speed of sound, BO. Censorship helps nothing but enabling laziness.

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 No.52020

>>52013

No, it’s not anything to do with the white race; in fact, quite the opposite. I have been trying to back away from 4chan /pol/, because you’re right; it’s toxic. They purposely try to make you feel like all hope is lost.

I know I sound retarded in what I’m about to say, but I’m actually fascinated in a foreign culture, and I want to preserve it. That’s all I’m saying. I still want guidance from another being that knows all and can give me the best advice as to what to do.

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 No.52021

File: e22f8f67e78aa40⋯.jpg (31.88 KB, 212x387, 212:387, vacuum-tube-multi-unit-sym….jpg)

File: 314488c065de38f⋯.jpg (84.47 KB, 969x400, 969:400, electronics-tube-symbols-a….jpg)

File: 9cebaa585f106ad⋯.png (35.63 KB, 590x936, 295:468, Symbols_Camm_590.png)

File: a751274b0ff5f5c⋯.gif (15.84 KB, 400x277, 400:277, fig2.gif)

File: d0b3010e6b0da7e⋯.jpg (196.55 KB, 1082x800, 541:400, Schematic_Legend_Big.jpg)

>>51980

Unrelated, but it's eerie how much a lot of those symbols look like the schematic symbols for vacuum tubes.

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 No.52042

File: 978dac1712809f0⋯.jpg (168.25 KB, 500x750, 2:3, tumblr_naradrWVe91sjoq1co1….jpg)

>>51980

Anon, you have the ability to control your mind. I suggest you start working on that. Choose what you want to think about, turn away from the OCD repetitiveness. Choose what feelings and emotions you want. This takes practice and HABIT. Keep doing it and it will become second nature. OCD, the repeating, the loop of thoughts are a trap to prevent you from doing anything. Relax and choose your thoughts, control your mind. This will take time, took me a long time, but it's something I knew was important. Read Robert Monroes trilogy (you don't need to perform OBE's, just read the books for the knowledge Mr. Monroe gained) Read Carlos Castaneda. He talks of controlling the mind (They gave us their mind, it is not ours) he goes into explanation of our minds and need to overcome it and control it. R E L A X anon, when you "turn away" from the thoughts/emotions/feelings you do not want to have, do this: Rather than ignore those thoughts simply 'look over their shoulders' and move on from them. This is called a maneuver. Good luck, anon. I will be thinking of you. Everything is ok, even when it does not feel like it.

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