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No.54788[Last 50 Posts]
He is dull. A dog faced pony soldier. He doesn't work for you. He has asthma which kept him from the Draft but not from football and life guarding. He doesn't want his kids growing up in a racial jungle. He tell Bibi to stop and Bibi says sure, then conducts more airstrikes ten minutes after.
____________________________
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No.54799
>>54788
Id enjoy putting his penis in my mouth
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No.54800
>>54788
true.... nobody's denying it.
it speaks volumes when your candidate couldn't win against such a boring, full guy.
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No.54801
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No.54802
He is illiterate. An uneducated amphetamine addict. He doesn't work. He has bone spurs which kept him from the Draft but not from bankruptcy and raping a 13 year old girl with Jeffrey Epstein. He doesn't want his kids growing up. He tell Barr to stop criminal Investigation and Barr says sure, then illegally hides crimes.
________
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No.54803
I'd like to perform fellatio on trump and biden simultaneously
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No.54808
>>54802
>>54802
>>54800
>>54801
ah the meth head again.
so methy mcmetherson, if both Biden and Trump are draft dodgers why did the military like Trump and hate Biden?
Was it because Trump could return a salute?
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No.54811
>>54808
ahhhh it's the cowardly sheltered coddled little videogame sissy boy who's never even tried drugs, and has no sexual experience under his belt....
lol @ you erroneously thinking the military supported Trump...
(He had one of the lowest approval ratings with the military of any modern day president since Truman)
Regarding meth...
I haven't touched drugs in 5 years...
And you've never touched a vagina in your entire life...
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No.54812
>>54808
It's hilarious now you cling to a fabricated reality.
Too bad your candidate didn't have what it takes to win the election against a boring dull bland milquetoast candidate like Biden
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No.54813
>>54808
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS REFUSE TO ANSWER?
AGAIN :
Tell us the first name of the first girl you ever fucked
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No.54814
>>54808
I'm not asking you to give us her complete name..
I'm simply asking you to tell us herfirst name
(This is the part where you squirm and struggle to develop a response that's not laughable)
AGAIN :TELL US THE NAME OF THE FIRST GIRL YOU EVER FUCKED
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No.54815
>>54808
And while you are busy trying to make up a girl's name, also feel free to make up a believable scenario
Because I want to hear the circumstances surrounding the first time you ever fucked a girl
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No.54816
>>54808
There's one thing you can count on........
The validity of your story, or the lack thereof, will be crystal clear from the details you give surrounding the incident...
Tell us how you met her
Tell us how you talked her into bed
Tell us about the sex acts you performed
Describe her physically
TELL US ABOUT THE FIRST TIME YOU EVER FUCKED A GIRL
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No.54817
>>54808
Because your story will be a lie, and everybody will be able to tell you're lying....
Simply because of the details.. you're incapable of fabricating a believable scenario....
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No.54818
>>54808
ALSO :exactly how old are you?
I'd like to know how many years you've been on this planet and STILL couldn't figure out how to attract a female into your life
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No.54819
>>54808
LORI MCCLENDON
Lori McClendon was the first girl I ever fucked
I was 15 years old and she was 17.. she had big boobs but they were firm and upright.. she literally sexually assaulted me.. it was only awkward for the first .00073109 milliseconds, and then all of that awkward uncertainty and fear instantly vanished....
I fucked the shit out of her. She was my buddy's girlfriend.. Louis didn't realize I was fucking his girlfriend, even though I didn't give a damn if he found out or not...
After I blew a load into her snatch while I had her on her knees doggy style, Lori turned around and gave me the first blowjob of my life...
It was November 21st, and I'll never forget it.
Everything changed for me that day in a blink of an eye... All of my virginal fear and apprehension was instantly vaporized, and the next day I was right back at it again... After fucking Lori, I started fucking every girl I could get my hands on...
It's strange how losing your virginity makes you realize exactly how much of a coward and a pussy ass Sissy you behaved like before finally getting laid....
TELL US HER FIRST NAME
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No.54821
>>54808
I'm going to demonstrate how people can tell whether you're being truthful or lying simply by paying attention to the details of your story :
THE SCENARIO :
I lived in Buckhead, the most exclusive part of Atlanta, and the highest property value of the entire state of Georgia...
Lori lived in an apartment on Peachtree Street in Brookhaven, a neighboring area in Atlanta.... She shared an apartment with a woman in her 30s who worked for Alex Cooley, a big concert promoter from Atlanta...
This was long before cell phones, and we had landlines.... Lori called me at my mother's house, and told me the woman had gone out of town on business, but she wanted me to come over there and help her "pick a lock" to the woman's bedroom door, because the woman had a bunch of Quaaludes in her bedroom...
Because I was 15, I wasn't driving yet, so I jumped on a Marta bus and rode to Lori's apartment...
When I got there, Lori pointed out the door she wanted me to unlock... And I decided "what the hell" andliterally kicked the door off the hinges
Just one firm kick : BOOOM !!!!
I destroyed the door and part of the door frame
And Lori seemed to think it was cool
We went into the bedroom and found the Quaaludes, and before we even took any of the Quaaludes, Lori was unzipping my pants....
see, lonely boy ?
That's how you tell a true story from a lie
True stories have all kinds of superfluous details
TELL US ABOUT THE FIRST TIME YOU EVER FUCKED A GIRL
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No.54822
>>54808
WHAT'S TAKING YOU SO LONG?........
I SAID TELL US THE STORY ABOUT THE FIRST TIME YOU EVER FUCKED A GIRL
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No.54823
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
watch your boy Biden bomb
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No.54825
>>54823
I couldn't care less about Biden.. I didn't vote for Biden....
SENT YOUR TWO AFRAID TO ADMIT YOU'VE NEVER HAD SEX WITH A GIRL IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE :
Allow me to finish telling you about the time I thought Lori McClendon in the snatch, in the throat, then in the snatch again after kicking her housemates bedroom door off the hinges
(It's not like you have anything better to do, and you've got nowhere else to go, so you're going to sit here and read every word, lonely little misdirected confused and scared sexless genius political commentator)
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No.54826
>>54823
lol !!! Hahaha I actually think speech to text typos are pretty cool..... I'm making a badass salad fresh from our garden and using speech to text while I chop up the vegetables....
SINCE YOU'RE TOO AFRAID TO ADMIT YOU'VE NEVER HAD SEX WITH A GIRL IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE : allow me to finish telling you about the time I blew a load into Lori McClendon's incredibly tight 17 year old snatch, came in her mouth, then blew a third load into her snatch again
(You're not going anywhere, lonely guy)
You're going to stay and read every painful word
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No.54827
>>54825
>>54826
the meth is hitting hard today huh? you're so active? how is your fake wife?
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No.54828
>>54825
I forgot, as a convicted felon, you can't vote.
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No.54830
>>54823
But before I continue demonstrating how you can tell the truth by the details, first allow me to explain something to you one more time :
(Because I realized you had a childhood diagnosis of attention deficit)
Pay attention dum dum
I DID NOT VOTE FOR BIDEN
I COULDN'T CARE LESS ABOUT BIDEN
BIDEN MEANS NOTHING TO ME
You're such a socially failed unobservant lonely little shut-in, that you actually thought I gave a fuck about Biden ?......
SINCE YOU ARE TOO AFRAID TO SIMPLY ADMIT AND THAT YOU'VE NEVER FUCKED A FEMALE IN YOUR LIFE, LET ME TELL YOU WHAT IT'S LIKE WHEN YOU'RE 15 YEARS OLD AND YOU START FUCKING THE SHIT OUT OF HOT GIRLS EVERYDAY
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No.54831
>>54827
>>54828
Obviously you're getting me confused with Jerry, the hepatitis C patient, the needle sharing heroin junkie, who shared needles with scumbags, and contracted hepatitis C for the rest of his life, exposing his current girlfriend Nancy to the fatal liver disorder
Yeah, see... Jerry is still doing drugs....
LET ME EXPLAIN WHAT IT'S LIKE TO LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY
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No.54832
>>54827
>>54828
Feel free to go to /freedomzine/ and ask Jerry (the board "owner") what it's like to expose Nancy to hepatitis C
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No.54834
>>54828
RE: felon
Hahaha thank you for demonstrating how little you actually understand
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No.54835
(So you're one of those morons who actually thinks felons can't vote ?)
hahahahaha!!!
You stupid mother fucker !!
You can't figure out how to get a girl
You think I voted for Biden
And you think felons can't vote ???!!!!
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No.54836
>>54827
>>54828
Keep in mind that the story I'm telling you isn't all that rare... What IS rare is an adult male who never had any pussy in his life
an ABNORMIE....
The defective product that got tossed after coming off the assembly line...
The man who's never been with a woman in his life
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No.54837
The factory reject defective sex machine who didn't pass quality control....
and spent the rest of his life in the reject bin at the factory
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No.54838
>>54827
>>54828
So while you're busy trying to convince yourself that I am a Biden supporter (wtf??) I'm going to tell you what happened after I fucked Lori McClendon that day....
I was one of those lucky kids, whose mother was a bit of a gourmet chef.. mom cooked amazing AMAZING meals... My friends would always tell me it's like we had Thanksgiving dinner all year long.. mom would create lavish gourmet meals, all made from scratch, with all of the extras and "trimmings" you could possibly think of...
For example, mom would always make at least two different desserts with each meal, and everything would always be prepared and laid out with attention to detail...
(We didn't even realize how good we had it, because we simply assumed everybody's mother cooked like that... imagine my surprise when I actually went to my friend's houses and tried their mother's food)
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No.54839
>>54827
>>54828
After fucking Lori in the snatch, the throat, and the snatch again, I jumped on a MARTA bus and headed back home...
Mom had made Maine lobster tails that night, with the clarified butter, crab legs, and a wide assortment of delicious side dishes...
Since we were approaching Thanksgiving, and Lori was from another state, no family in Atlanta, and now she was alone again in that apartment down the street, I thought a noble man would bring a nice tray of dinner to the female who took his virginity from him....
So I loaded up a tray with lobster tails and crab legs and homemade creamed mushrooms and baked potato and grilled corn on the cob, and a couple different desserts....
LOL I can still see me now.. sitting on the MARTA bus, with a huge smile on my face, headed back over to Lori's apartment with a big tray of food...
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No.54840
>>54827
>>54828
So you actually think I'm a Biden supporter?
lol that's a hoot !!!
You literally don't know your ass
from a hole in the ground
You are TERRIBLE at "reading people"
(Due to your profound lack of experience)
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No.54841
>>54823
>>54827
>>54828
so..... Lori had no idea I was coming back....
She was topless when she answered the door, wearing nothing but a pair of underwear...
She kept saying "oh you shouldn't have"
And I couldn't wipe the grin off my face
"Oh you really shouldn't have"
Imagine a 17 year old girl lifting the lid to the tray, and seeing a main lobster dinner with all of the works !!!
(She didn't say "you shouldn't have" after seeing what I brought her)
I sat there in her living room listening to music while she devoured the food.. I don't know if she ever even had lobster tails before, but she acted like she had never seen food before, and she literally devoured every single morsel on the platter)
My mother made particularly exceptional desserts from scratch, and I think it was homemade cheesecake and some kind of Waldorf salad or ambrosia.. I forgot, but I'm pretty positive one of them was homemade cheesecake... and my mother made cheesecake better than anybody in New York ever made it...
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No.54843
>>54841
do all your made up wives ever get jealous of each other and fighter over who get to have your dried out carcass to turn in for the SSI death benefit?
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No.54845
I sat there and watched her eat every bite
And for the first time in my life, I had become aMAN
The awkward insecure teenager died that afternoon, but the new found MAN sat and enjoyed the view, kind of like a hunter and gatherer, having brought an exquisite elaborate gourmet meal to the woman who gave herself to me....
Lori said she didn't want to be alone in that apartment all night, so we each took a quaalude, and she led me by the hand upstairs to her bedroom....
We spooned and watched TV in her bed, and I couldn't resist while spooning from behind her, and I crammed myself back into her snatch from behind, and we fucked until we both fell asleep...
Lori got kicked out of the apartment when her roommate came home and saw the bedroom door kicked off the hinges and all the Quaaludes were gone....
But by that time, I was already busy fucking a series of other teenage girls, and I completely forgot about Lori....
That's the same year I got hired to be a doorman at a nightclub in Atlanta, even though I was only 15 years old....
I have always looked older than I am, so at the age of 15 I look like I was 30....
Rick Frommer owned the nightclub called Hedgen's, and he never asked me how old I was.. I was already going to the bar pretty much every night, so when he walked up and asked me, "how do you like to be the doorman here?" I said "hell yeah. I might as well be drinking for free" and my age never entered the conversation...
I was 15 years old working the door of Hedgen's Tavern when a drop dead gorgeous 36-year-old registered nurse named Joy grabbed me by my arm, dragged me to her car, took me to her place, fucked my brains out, and I never left...
I became Joy's live-in boyfriend....
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No.54846
>>54843
see, EVERY GUY can tell you the story about the night they lost their virginity
My story is not that different from most
Certainly, YOU also have a story about the time you lost your virginity....
TELL US ALL ABOUT IT, BIG GUY
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No.54847
>>54843
You seem to be avoiding the subject
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No.54848
>>54843
I don't understand.. please tell me why you're avoiding the subject
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No.54850
>>54843
DON'T TELL ME...... YOU'RE JOKING, RIGHT ?
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No.54851
>>54843
YOU'VE NEVER HAD SEX WITH A FEMALE BEFORE?!!!!!
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No.54853
>>54843
That's okay.. you're still like.. what.. 14?
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No.54854
>>54843
YOU'RE AN ADULT?!!!!
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No.54855
>>54843
wait a second, here........................
YOU'RE PULLING MY LEG, AREN'T YOU?
ARE YOU SERIOUS ?!!!
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No.54857
>>54843
well now, since you are incapable of telling the story of how you lost your virginity......
INSTEAD, TELL US THE TOP 27 REASONS WHY YOU CANT GET A GIRL
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No.54858
>>54843
no need to tell us ALL of the reasons why you're incapable of getting any pussy....
That would take too long...
Instead, just limit it down to the TOP 27 REASONS
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No.54859
>>54843
here, since you've already demonstrated what a coward you are, I'll help you.....
I will list the top 27 reasons why you're incapable of getting any pussy
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No.54860
>>54843
1 : FEAR
2 : COWARDICE
3 : INABILITY TO CONQUER FEAR
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No.54861
>>54843
Hang in there sissy boy only 24 more to go
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No.54862
4 : sexual attraction towards other men
5 : overwhelming insecurity
6 : low testosterone count
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No.54863
>>54843
Hang In There Lonely girl, only 21 more to go
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No.54864
7 : terrified of rejection
8 : small penis
9 : fear of female seeing your tiny penis
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No.54865
>>54843
Are you still with me sally? Only 18 more to go
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No.54866
>>54843
10 : only experience with females is being ridiculed in school
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No.54867
>>54843
Don't go anywhere cream puff! Only 17 more to go
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No.54868
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No.54869
>>54843
Fasten your safety belt, SweetieBoy only 16 more to go
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No.54870
>>54843
12 : ABSENT FATHER
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No.54871
>>54843
Don't leave now, Sassypants!! Only 15 more to go
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No.54872
13 : low IQ mother who coddled you
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No.54873
>>54843
Hang in there switchboard Susan only 14 more to go
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No.54874
>>54843
14 : stunted emotional development thanks to your low IQ divorced mother's incompetence, coddling you and enabling you to continue playing video games instead of becoming a man
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No.54875
>>54843
Stick around pussy butt, only 13 more to go
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No.54876
>>54843
15 : EFFEMINATE SPINELESS FATHER
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No.54877
>>54843
The apple truly doesn't fall far from the tree, dose it Sallyboy?
Everybody knows the way to spot an effeminate father is by spotting his effeminate SON
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No.54878
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No.54879
>>54843
This is fun, isn't it? Only 11 more to go
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No.54880
(By now you've noticed my uncanny ability to get every single one of the 27 reasons correct)
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No.54881
>>54843
17 : PORNOGRAPHY
Some people can afford to eat at fancy restaurants
And then there's people like you, starving Ethiopian children, who think it will suffice to lick photographs in a cookbook
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No.54882
You probably thought nobody could read you
You probably thought because you're in an image board hiding behind a computer, nobody could figure you out...
HANG IN THERE DICK SUCK, ONLY 10 MORE TO GO
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No.54883
>>54843
17 : IMAGEBOARDS
While all the other young men your age were losing their virginity, dating, securing girlfriends, having shitloads of sex and partying, socializing with others girlfriend in arm, getting engaged, getting married, having kids.... YOU have spent your existence surrounded by sexually failed adult males in dead empty image boards, pretending like you're some kind of big wheel all knowing political expert
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No.54884
>>54843
Don't leave now, penismouth.... Only 9 more to go
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No.54885
>>54843
18 : FEAR
19 : FEAR
20 : FEAR
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No.54886
Stick Around, Sedentary SpermGulp
Only six more to go
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No.54887
>>54843
21 : EFFEMINITY (you're not vaguely masculine)
22 : EFFEMINITY (you're not vaguely masculine)
23 : EFFEMINITY (you're not vaguely masculine)
There's nothing about you that is even vaguely reminiscent of masculinity
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No.54888
Still with me Sissy?....
Only three more to go
PLUS ONE FOR GOOD MEASURE
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No.54889
>>54843
24 : LACK OF BASIC INTELLIGENCE
even the STUPIDEST IDIOTS can figure out how to get pussy
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No.54890
>>54843
Notice how I've gotten every single one correct so far?.. it's a lot easier than you thought
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No.54891
>>54843
25 : OVERWEIGHT & OUT OF SHAPE
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No.54892
>>54843
About 10 minutes ago you actually started to wonder if I know you in real life....
You actually did...
You wondered if I knew you in real life because I'm describing you perfectly
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No.54893
>>54843
26 : LOW SELF-ESTEEM, ZERO CONFIDENCE
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No.54894
>>54843
Only one more to go, you lonely isolated emotionally unstable infantile inexperienced video game playing anime watching image board surfing pornography jacking sexually failed socially incompetent little boy trapped in the body of an adult male
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No.54895
>>54843
UNRESOLVED CHILDHOOD PSYCHOLOGICAL ISSUES, COMPOUNDED BY A REPRESSED LATENT HOMOSEXUALITY THAT YOU THINK NOBODY CAN DETECT
YOU ARE STUNTED
You're a little toddler
Mommy's little video game Sissy
You've always known you were attracted to men
But you repressed it
Yet image boards
Afforded you the opportunity
To explore your "INNER FEMALE"
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No.54896
>>54843
andTHAT'Segg zack lee® why you've never had sex with a female, and at this point, you're more likely to be struck by lightning
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No.54898
>>54843
now.....................
I want you to tell me about the superhero movies
And how you used to watch WWE wrestling
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No.54901
>>54843
It seems like you have an affinity for men wearing tight underwear
Muscular sweaty men.. wearing tight underwear
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No.54902
>>54843
Which superhero has your favorite penis?
Which WWE wrestler wore the tightest underwear?
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No.54905
>>54843
Now let's talk about all the photographs of men's penises you have downloaded on your computer
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No.54907
>>54843
....and DONOTeven waste your time denying that you have a bunch of downloaded photographs of other men's penises
Because you're not fooling anybody
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No.54916
>>54843
Joy was absolutely gorgeous !!!
She had blonde hair (natural, downstairs as well)
Cut into a little pixie haircut
Bright blue eyes
Absolutely gorgeous face
Great smile
Drop dead knockout body
I'm not into big tits
And hers were not gigantic
But they were big
Not droopy or saggy
They were firm
And she had a thin tiny little frame
But somehow her tits
Worked really well on her body
Perfect light pink nipples
With just the slightest amount of puffiness
To the areolas
Tiny little petite frame
Thin with perfect curves
Perfect little hips and a perfect little ass
Like I said she was 36
And I think I had just turned 16
But then again it might have been
Right before I turned 16
Because in real life
People don't generally say
To themselves
"Today is Thursday August 4th and I met somebody"
(However most people actually DO remember the date of losing their virginity, because they waited 15 years to get to that point)
HOW OLD DID YOU SAY YOU ARE?
oh yeah, you were too afraid to say
Joy had it ALL !!......
She was visually gorgeous
She was smart as shit
She was funny
She thought real fast
She was sharp as a tack
She was classy and sophisticated
She came from a really good family
Her father was a surgeon
And her sister was also a nurse
The entire family was loaded
They lived in a beautiful huge house in Marietta
Joy had money. lots of it
Joy had a badass apartment
Joy had really good taste
All of her furniture was super nice
She had a badass car
Joy was super generous
I became her teenage live in boyfriend
The reverse of an older man with a teenage girl
Joy would buy me anything I wanted
Joy spoiled me rotten
Joy could get the best drugs
Joy knew a lot about medicine
Joy knew more than most nurses ever will
Joy was absolutely brilliant
She had an AMAZING vagina
She had the perfect snatch
She had the best god damn holes
Visually PERFECT
I used to just sit there and look at it
She would pose for me
And I would roll joints
And sit and stare at her snatch
Absolutely perfect
Some people think "all vaginas are the same"
Nothing could be further from the truth
Hers was MAGAZINE COVER PERFECT
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No.54917
>>54843
WHY WON'T YOU TELL ME HOW OLD YOU ARE?
Is there some reason why you would be embarrassed to admit your age ?
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No.54919
>>54843
I don't get it.. I don't understand why you would be embarrassed to admit your age.. would you explain that to me?.. why are you embarrassed to tell me how old you are?
Is there some reason why you are hesitant to admit your age?
Is it because you feel you missed most of life's landmarks, becoming an adult, and admitting your age would only further highlight your lack of real life experiences?
is THAT it ?.................
Don't be like that..... There's no reason to be like that.. I'm your friend.. you can be honest with me
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No.54921
>>54843
seriously, dude....................
don't be that way
We're friends......
You can be honest with me
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No.54922
>>54843
................28 ?
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No.54924
>>54843
................32 ?
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No.54925
>>54843
................higher?
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No.54926
>>54843
................33 ?
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No.54927
>>54843
................37 ?
too high?
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No.54929
>>54843
................34 ?
Thirty Four?
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No.54934
>>54843
anyway.... yeah, Joy always had a quarter pound of good weed at any given moment, and she kept it in this cool briefcase thing, and I used to put the briefcase thing on my lap and roll big fat joints on it, and Joy would lay back right there on the sofa totally naked with her legs spread, and she would pull her labia apart, and just hang out modeling her open vagina for me...
==Q: have you ever been rolling a joint staring at your girlfriend's open vagina, while she took commands from you like "okay squeeze it closed" or "now just pull it open on one side from the bottom so it looks like it's a pouting clowns mouth" and thought to yourself, 'when I get done rolling this joint I'm going to fuck her in the ass while she pulls her snatch open' ?....
no ?.......
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No.54936
>>54843
And when I said I moved into Joy's apartment that's exactly what I meant..
She was leaving Hedgen's Tavern, by herself, after partying with friends from work, saw me standing at the door, (back then I used to wear pajamas to work with an actual authentic Soviet military cap, so I was looking pretty cool) then she said "WOAH!" and grabbed my sleeve and literally dragged me away from my job. We got in her car and she introduced herself as she backed out of the parking lot and took me straight to her apartment......
100% true
And I never left..
A couple days later she took me to my mother's house, where I got all of my things (including my king size waterbed) and officially moved into Joy's apartment.... I moved out at 16...
And of course my mother was happy
Because obviously her little boy
Had grown up
>>54843
This was all within a year of losing my virginity, and I had banged other girls in between, but you could say this was my FIRST REAL GIRLFRIEND
Joy and I lived together for 4 years....
Basically man and wife
Because as you know...........
Your girlfriend pretty much IS your wife
The piece of paper means nothing
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No.54937
>>54843
....... By the way.. I'm curious..
exactly WHAT made you think I was a "Biden Supporter"?.....
seriously....... tell me ....
Because I find that so ironic that I'm amazed
I find it so amazing that I'm confused
I find it so confusing that I'm fascinated
And I find it so fascinating that it's ironic
It's ironic that you would think" I "was a Biden Supporter
ME ??!!!......
hahahahahahaha that's classic
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No.54938
>>54843
shitlips, I couldn't give any less of a fuck about Biden
I'm definitely not a "Biden Supporter"
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No.54940
>>54843
see, I was 16 so although I loved Joy very much, (very very much) I was still young and it was my first real relationship....
She was in her mid 30s so she was already experienced about life and she had found herself already, whereas I was still somewhat finding myself...
Both together with her...
And individually by myself.....
It goes with the territory when you're dealing with age gaps in a relationship....
So that's why when a 16 year old HOT AS FUCK girl named "Katherine" knocked on Joy's door one day while Joy was at work, I actually lost my moral compass
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No.54942
>>54843
Awwwww, why am I telling you?
.......... You've been there too
You've experienced it
Of course you've been surprised by a hot as fuck 16 year old girl who came to your live in 36-year-old girlfriend's apartment knowing your girlfriend was at work, because the 16-year-old girl lived across the street and wanted to come over and have sex with you behind your girlfriend's back...
so I'm not telling you anything you don't already know....
this isn't anything you haven't experienced yourself at least a dozen times, right?
Isn't that right, video game boy?
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No.54943
>>54843
Listen cock gobble.. let me explain something to you
You ain't shit....
YOU AIN'T ABOUT JACK SHIT
You ain't shit
Your image board culture ain't shit
Your video games ain't shit
You're a little boy
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No.54944
>>54843
..............................dude....................................
Tell me some more about how I like Joe Biden!!
Tell me about how I'm a Biden supporter!
genius
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No.54945
>>54788
yeah, so Katherine was like A TOTAL SMOKE SHOW
Hard to explain really...
I mean I could tell you she had long brown hair
And a perfect body
And an AMAZING FACE
And her eyes lit up
And her smile glowed
She was vibrant
But you'd really have to see her to understand
And she was 16
My same age
She lived with her mother across the street
Actually kind of catty -corner diagonally
Across the street
And I had seen her a few times
But I had no idea
Katherine was going to knock on the door
So I was totally flabbergasted when I opened the door... I was kinda like "and what the fuck do you want?" (I didn't actually say that to Katherine, it's just what I was thinking in my head, like "this is different. Exactly why the fuck are you here?" kind of thing)
And she said "can I come in?"
And I said yes.......
I regretted that decision so much over the course of my relationship with joy.... Believe it or not I have very high morals, and I'm kind of old-fashioned, and I'm not the type to cheat on a lover if we are in a monogamous relationship.
But like I said I was young...
And I made the wrong decision...
But I learned from it
And that's why for the rest of my life I promised myself I would never become that person again
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No.54946
Joy never found out
I never told her
Because I was a coward
I was only worried about myself
And I was afraid of what would happen
If I told her the truth
So for the rest of our relationship
I had given myself a black eye
A black eye that only I knew about
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No.54949
>>54788
I'm certain that you've cheated on your girlfriends before....
Because as you know, if you don't have a girlfriend or a wife, it seems like no woman on earth realizes you exist...
But as soon as you have a girlfriend or a wife, unexplainably and with no rhyme or reason, the universe seems to start sending women in your direction, and everywhere you go girls are flirtatious with you....
I'm sure you're familiar with that phenomenon
And I'm certain you have cheated on one of your girlfriends before, simply because there's a snowball effect about getting pussy....
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No.54950
>>54788
Were you also riddled with guilt after cheating on your girlfriend the same way I was?
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No.54951
>>54788
There is a silver lining to that guilt....................
I used to have a buddy named Michael who called himself "Cap'n America" (yes, he actually called himself Cap'n America and everybody else called him that, too) and he drove this badass black 1960 Fleetwood Cadillac limousine with the big batmobile wings on the back... And everywhere we went, we caused so much chaos and we were kind of like a tornado.... A two man tornado that would go to the nightclubs downtown and raise all kinds of hell and we knew all of the nightclub owners and promoters and even though we were under age we still got into all of the nightclubs...
Cap'n and I went down to the 688 Club on spring Street in Atlanta (where we actually saw the birth of the punk rock movement, all the way to the actual death of goth) and if you Google it you will find out that the 688 Club was extremely instrumental in the onset of several musical genres and America's party scene... A lot of firsts happened in the 688 Club....
It was a first for me....
When Cap'n & I saw Katherine with her friends
Standing right there in the middle of 688
And I walked right up to her
And I looked her in the eyes
And I told her
"I should have never done that to Joy!"
And I told her
"don't ever come back to my apartment again!"
And although Joy was not there that night, I still stood up for her... But I feel more importantly I stood up for myself....
I stood up for what I believed in
Albeit a little bit late
A little bit after the fact you could say
Because after all
the first time
I laid down for Katherine
Instead of standing up for joy
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No.54952
>>54788
I'm sure that you've also had to walk up to girls you've been fucking behind your girlfriend's back, look them in the eyes and admit that you made a mistake, and told them it's over, and don't ever come back to your place again....
Of course you have
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No.54953
>>54788
I never cheated on Joy again.. when we broke up after 4 years together, it had nothing to do with infidelity on either one's part...
We had simply grown in different directions
2 years into our relationship, I got hired as a strip club DJ... And I still never cheated on her for those two years..
McDonald's employees have to deal with thousands of hamburgers
And a strip club DJ has to deal with thousands of nude young females with questionable morals
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No.54954
>>54788
I don't know why I'm even explaining this to you, because of course you've also had to deal with thousands of hot strippers at your job, always coming up into your cubicle putting their hands on your dick while they tell you what songs they want to dance to on their next set....
duhhhhh
who HASN'T, right ???!!!
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No.54957
>>54788
and although they had questionable morals...
That didn't mean I did....
And for two entire years I deejayed at the strip club, and I never cheated on Joy....
BUT........
I indeed DID grow very much apart from Joy
My hours conflicted with hers
Which was okay at first
But it began to cement
A wedge between us
And we were distancing anyway
Because now she was 40
And I was 20
And we had grown apart
And it happens...............
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No.54959
>>54788
Of course you're familiar with the feeling......
When you and your girlfriend
Have simply grown in different directions
And much the way
We don't notice
How fast do children grow up
Nor do we notice
How fast people can grow apart
You don't even realize it as the process is happening
I know you're familiar with that feeling
Where you have to simply accept
That the past is over
The light has faded to darkness
And although it hurts
You know that around the corner
Your future is going to be even brighter
Change is always scary
But it's exciting
And that's what you live for, right ?....
right?.............
You live for that scary excitement
As you hop from one girl to the next
right?.......
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No.54960
>>54788
Isn't that right, you "lyin' motherpony doggiesoldier"?
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No.54961
You know what's interesting? You can tell a lot about society and the driving forces of meme by looking at the available pornography in circulation.
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No.54962
For instance, there's absolutely zero pornography about joe Biden molesting little girls.
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No.54963
Yet there's this: a clear inequality about transposition of characters into popular memes.
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No.54964
>>54788
but yeah ........................
When joy and I broke up, you could say I made up for lost time @ literally fucking EVERY God damn stripper that ever came up into my booth...
That's an understatement...
I would fuck them right there in the DJ booth while I worked... I'd have strippers on their knees (more than once I had two strippers down there at the same time because strippers love to take turns fucking to DJ) sucking my balls dry while I stood at the turntables and accepted tips from drunken traveling businessman customers who would pay me $20 or $40 just to play a goddamn song
Little did those idiots realize I was going to play that fucking song anyway..
And the stripper they just paid $100 to for a lap dance just got done letting me fuck her in the ass up in the DJ booth....
Not joking.... That pretty much describes the typical night
But I don't need to explain it to you, do I big guy?
You've been there before
You've been there, done that
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No.54965
You'll notice that there's more interest amongst conservative artists to represent Donald trump as heroic.
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No.54966
>>54965
no.........
actually NO... We did not notice that
Nobody cares about that
So why would we notice?
Apparently you're the only one that noticed
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No.54967
>>54966
You don't notice because you can't correlate the likelihood that a conservative would be inspired by art considering their right-left brained influences versus the motivation for a liberal to be inspired to make art for their great leader Biden.
If biden was this popular there would be more pornography for Biden versus trump.
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No.54968
>>54965
I like the one I made
Yours is garbage
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No.54969
>>54965
Why is your taste so infantile?
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No.54970
>>54967
You see, the conservative is much less inspired to create accurate and quality art work expressing their feelings. If biden was the most powerful man ever voted in the entire existence of humanity he would champion more degrading pornography at a ratio that reflects the likelihood a liberal would create a work of art versus a conservative.
There's a huge disparity and it's generally shown by the amount of pornography made by artists all over the internet who are invariably left leaning.
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No.54971
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No.54972
>>54965
Is that some kind of prerequisite to be one of you image board parrots?....
Everybody has to pretend like theyre a 7 year old, and always refer to terribly drawn childish effeminate children's cartoons?
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No.54973
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No.54974
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No.54975
If everything was logical we would see lolicon inspired rule 34 featuring joe Biden.
Let me explain why
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No.54976
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No.54977
Sorry, but if any of this were "natural" wed have set of Joe Biden screwing little kids.
It's pretty obvious. I've been watching the political influence of pornography people in politics can't watch for 20 years.
;)
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No.54978
>>54975
see?!!!!!
All of that cartoon artwork is a feminate and creepy. Like it was drawn by a big fat lady
It's a gross kind of effeminate
It's not only awful artwork
Like cracked magazine versus mad magazine
But it's also childish and EFFEMINATE
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No.54979
Such is the ironic fate of unintended consequences of project monarch and mkultra.
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No.54980
>>54979
Look at me I can repeat trendy concepts like MK ultra
Look how much I know
right?
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No.54981
>>54978
You see, these images of Loli Hilary Clinton were only produced during her popularity and chances for being prepared for a presidency.
You see what's interesting is that she's not particularly sexually attractive.
I would be posting what the truth is but now it's being censored because "child sex through cartoons" is being scrubbed through the internet at the same time.
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No.54982
>>54980
I work at MKUltra faggot.
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No.54983
>>54982
Of course you do, Super Mario..........
Of course you do
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No.54984
I worked at MKUltra studying the evolution of the internet for 20 years until my team was assisted by a bunch of brainwashed drone soldiers pumped up to maximum violence.
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No.54985
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No.54986
>>54981
I DIDN'T STUTTER, JOE.......
AGAIN : you seem to prefer terribly executed, aesthetically ugly, horribly illustrated, infantile and EFFINATE children's quality cartoon art, that looks like it was drawn by a 340 lb middle-aged woman
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No.54987
You see this? It only existed on 8chan during the possiblity that Clinton would be elected. Now, if this dynamic in humans were natural then we'd expect content from Joe Biden that's similar because all the other pornography being produced for Joe Biden is just him violently degrading trump which simply fits a public narrative and has no inspiration.
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No.54988
You see, my team was very important. My super friends, although perverted, were very powerful.
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No.54989
Quality cannot be overvalued.......
Why would you waste your time
Dabbling in the lowest quality ?
That artwork is horrible
It's hard to look at
It's like looking at the vagina
Of a 340 lb woman
It's so hideous
That I literally cringe
Literally
It's creepy
Because the artist is so talentless
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No.54990
There's no reality that can exist where hundreds of millions of people are on the internet and not one image of Biden molesting kids existed. It can't unless bing, Microsoft, and whoever murdered all my friends was fucking things up.
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No.54991
>>54987
I'm guessing you also listen to crappy music
Since you have no taste in art
You obviously don't have any taste in music
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No.54992
>>54990
Seriously..
Like I said the value of quality cannot be overstated
Some people will eat any garbage
While others have a more discriminating pallette
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No.54993
The problem I have with this situation is that it shows an important future move to create an agenda.
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No.54994
There's tons of shitty horrible music
Complete garbage
But some people
Like it
And then there's those with a real ear for music, who demand quality
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No.54995
>>54993
And then there's MAD MAGAZINE
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No.54996
The problem is that non of this organic.
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No.54997
>>54993
And the cheap worthless imitation :
CRACKED MAGAZINE
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No.54998
>>54994
People like being molested.
What's you're point
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No.54999
>>54996
Mad magazine had a staff of merchantish artists, and they were actually very talented and stylized and unique....
Even though it was a trash comic rag
They still had a standard of excellence
but CRACKED MAGAZINE?......
The artwork was awful
Hideous
It looked gay
As if a faggot had drawn the art
Or a woman with no talent
It was effeminate and ugly and amateurish
Pretty much exactly like the cartoon bullshit you like so much
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No.55001
>>54998
My point is you have terrible taste in art
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No.55002
>>54998
My point is people with terrible taste in art also have terrible taste in everything else
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No.55003
My point is:
Are you into anything that IS cool?
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No.55005
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
at least you are good at keeping yourself busy, with the meth, and the fake wives, and the voting for joe biden.
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No.55006
you can tell a lot about a man by his tastes
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No.55007
Now let's look at the current president and all his president fan pornography. The most famous and widely viewed and considered president in the history of the united states.
https://rule34.paheal.net/post/list/Joe_biden/1
Nope. Not a single joke about him and little girls.
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No.55008
>>55005
Yes........
Yes, I indeed AM..................
I'm keeping myself busy.....
Busy with all the meth........
Busy with all the fake wives
you are extremely talented
at "reading people", huh?
You're a natural
it's a gift
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No.55009
>>55007
You can tell a lot about a man by his interests
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No.55010
Now let's study the changes in fan art for bill Clinton.
https://rule34.paheal.net/post/list/Bill_Clinton/1
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No.55011
>>55007
You can tell a lot about a man by his behavior
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No.55012
>>55010
No............
"let's" not..........................
Let's talk about your future instead
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No.55013
>>55009
>>55009
I'm like the guy at the morgue but instead of a million dead bodies it's trends in pornography.
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No.55014
>>55010
What are you going to do? What's your plan?
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No.55015
>>55012
My future is not long lived. I planned on dying as a warrior the earth has never seen before. A champion and inspiration to forces of good over the world.
That won't happen so I'm canceling life.
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No.55016
>>55013
While it's true that guys at the morgue don't get any pussy either.....
Let's talk about your future...
Times running out....
What are you going to do?
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No.55017
>>55015
Yeah yeah that's that's all fine and dandy all right
But what about the internet bill?
And food?
What are you going to do?
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No.55018
>>55015
There was a 10 year plan. I mistook the beginning of my torture as a ritual to begin my accession to a warrior. It wasn't to break me down or do anything but ruin everything I was attempting to accomplish.
My plans were continuously ruined in a cycle for a decade and I no longer have a need for this body.
Unfortunately you don't seem to understand you're the not the only body snatchers in the universe.
I will strike myself down and become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.
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No.55019
>>55015
I realize that the "woe is me Doom and gloom" trend is real popular.....
But what about the internet bill?
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No.55020
>>55017
I will return to my alternate avatar and to my body constrained by great technology to contain my power.
My armor serves as tool so that I can interact with lesser beings without killing them with my intense radiation by simply existing next to them.
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No.55021
I take this form so that you may interact with me. My true form is so powerful that simply being able to see it causes instant death.
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No.55022
>>55018
You're not going to believe it but.....
Word for word... Everything you just typed IS MY MOST SUCCESSFUL PICKUP LINE!!.. you wouldn't believe how much pussy I've gotten saying that exact same thing to girls at nightclubs and restaurants
VERBATIM.......
All the warrior bullshit and Ascension
That shit turns girls on
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No.55023
>>55020
>>55021
Girls love that shit dude...
I bet you get so much pussy
Everything you're saying makes girls wet
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No.55024
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No.55025
>>55024
Ahhhh, the timeless "FACE OF GOD" pick up line?
I bet you're slaying tons of pussy
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No.55026
>>55025
Your SQL is strong.
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No.55027
I already told you it's a parasitic infection
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No.55028
>>55026
And I told you to take ivermectin
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No.55029
The diagnosis isn't going to change
It's a parasitic infection
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No.55030
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>55028
Yes. I told you before satan and it's children.
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No.55031
>>55029
>>55028
I'm taking enough poison to increase the amount of bile produced from my liver to kill your cells and to create enough intercellular pressure to destroy the cysts you created in my brain and liver through radiation poisoning.
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No.55032
This website is definitely garbage
I don't like any other websites either
I hate the entire internet
I hate the entire human race
But I definitely hate 4chan
And this place is worse
This website is pure garbage
It's completely dead
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No.55033
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No.55034
I'm willing to say there's a 90% chance the ivermectin will have great efficacy
And a 10% chance did my testicles smell like vinegar
I think I'm going to jump in the shower
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No.55035
Now we're at an interesting cross roads. You're spying on my brain and left with the options of forcing me to do the opposite. My plan is now to shorten my life and to remove you're cystic radiation through extreme increase of my blood pressure.
Now I've left breadcrumbs.
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No.55036
I know I've definitely reached a low point in my life
That's for sure.......
Just look at me.....
Jesus fucking Christ !!
I can't believe I dropped to this level !!!
I ended up being addicted to shitposting in the emptiest image board on the entire internet
And I thought smoking meth was bad
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No.55037
>>55035
yep.......
Sure as fuck I was right......
I just scratched my balls and smelled my fingers
And it smells like a mixture between sour rotting bile and vinegar, and gym socks
I better wash Deez nuts before my imaginary wife comes home, right?
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No.55038
It's really weird because I shower everyday
It's strange my testicles couldn't start smelling like bilirubin and rotting vinegar in a matter of 24 hours
Oh well....
I can live with that
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No.55039
I'm going to feed my imaginary cats some imaginary cat food, then I'm going to jump in my imaginary shower and use some imaginary body wash called EVERYMAN JACK™ that smells exactly like Wrigley's spearmint gum...
But it's imaginary
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No.55040
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
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No.55041
The shit smells EGG ZACK LEE™ like Wrigley's spearmint gum....
EXACTLY....
Not juicy fruit.. and I'm not talking about the Green pack.. I'm talking about the white pack of Wrigley's stick chewing gum.. the old stuff from the good old days
I figured the brand EVERYMAN JACK would be garbage, and in a way I guess it is.. it's not expensive stuff.. and it's a little bit cheesy and trendy I guess because of the name and the packaging....
But it smells pretty damn good.. it's actually kind of refreshing and nice it makes you smell nice and clean but you also smell like a pack of Wrigley's spearmint gum....
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No.55042
and honestly? it was Wendy who told me "MMMMMM YOU SMELL LIKE WRIGLEYS SPEARMINT GUM!"
and if she likes it, then I like it...
(imaginary Wendy, that is)
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No.55043
Myself ?......
I'm a Dr. BRONNER'S man
a purist
but this shit smells REALLY good
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No.55045
P A Y A T T E N T I O N :
(this is some of the best advice you'll ever get)
If you've never tried it before, you really owe it to yourself to buy a bottle of Dr Bronner's Peppermint Castile Soap....
Where do I begin?.. there's so many good things to say about it, I literally can't even think where to begin....
Trust me.... It's absolutely fucking amazing !!!!!
It can be used for anything, endless uses, but most importantly it's the perfect body wash, shampoo you'll ever find...
It's got pure peppermint oil in it, all completely natural ingredients, and the peppermint oil actually 'comes alive' on your skin....
Your entire body will tingle, it feels like your skin is coming to life for the first time, because the peppermint really does a number on you, and the fumes in the shower are like Vicks vapor rub or something, because it opens up your sinuses, and it's actually quite exhilarating....
It's nothing like any other soap or body wash...
This stuff actuallyLITES YOU UP !!!
It's invigorating !!
It's remarkable !!
It even makes your nuts burn a little bit
Not a painful burn
More like an exhilarating
Fresh peppermint oil
Tingling little taser
To each testicle
I swear to God.. this shit will light you up !!
It's the most refreshing shower you could imagine
And then all day you smell like fresh peppermint and Hemp
It's $16 and you can buy it anywhere
It used to only be available in health food stores when I was a kid... I've been buying it ever since I was a teenager, but we always had to go to health food stores to find it... These days it's available at Target and Walmart and some grocery stores
If you've never bought a bottle before?
Then you don't know what you're missing
You literally owe it to yourself
To go buy a bottle
Of Dr Bronner's
All natural
Peppermint oil
Hemp Soap
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No.55046
hint: anyone who's ever bought it before LOVES IT
you're not going to find anyone who didn't
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No.55047
Dr. Bronner's Peppermint Castile Soap :
the first time you'll ever get out of a shower with your entire body BUZZING AND TINGLING from the freshness
trust me
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No.55048
(but be warned : people always buy out all of the peppermint, so when you go to the Dr Bronner's section you will see their other soaps, but the peppermint sells out first)
Because it makes your entire body tingle like an effervescent buzzing tingle all over your skin, but Dr Bronner's other soaps don't make your skin tingle like that....
The tingle feels really really refreshing
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No.55049
I'm a lyin' pony-nosed doggycloud
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No.55050
I'm a barkin' ostrich-winged bellyflopper
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No.55051
And although it doesn't market itself this way, Dr Bronner's peppermint oil soap is antibacterial
Naturally antibacterial
Is the peppermint oil
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No.55052
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>55040
I've got Balls of Steeel
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No.55053
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
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No.55054
I'm a bit-chompin' goatneck cornish henwing
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No.55055
I'm a sidewalking cheetah with a heart full of napalm
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No.55057
>>55052
>>55053
Then you'll definitely enjoy Dr Bronner's peppermint soap
Because it'll Melt that Steel for a couple minutes. You'd be surprised
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No.55059
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>55057
You ever get get the cloud district? Of course you don't.
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No.55060
Hey Superman....
I just got done doing the dishes and feeding the cats... But before I jump into the shower I wanted to reach out to youand tell you something totally real
No online image board characters or personas
Just me.. to you....
Neptune to Superman
You're a smart guy
You're creative
A little bit repetitive
But so am I
We both have our schticks
But you're a creative guy
And you're not a bad man
And I really think you would do good at music
I'm being 100% serious
Neptune to Superman
Just me and you
Pay attention
You would probably be really good at making music
You should focus some of your creative energies in that direction...
I'm not sure if you've ever worked with sequencers like FL studio or pro tools before... But if you haven't, it's really really really easy to learn...
It's kind of self-explanatory
Especially FL studio
It's so user friendly
And the GUI is really well developed
It's really easy
And I think you'd be really good at it
Seriously.. you should give it some thought
Because you've got a lot of thoughts in your head
Because you're not stupid
Put some of the thoughts into music
And I'm not necessarily talking about lyrics
I'm not talking about stories
I'm talking about MUSIC
You should start by coming up with your own melodies and layer it with your production
Make some music
Express yourself with semitones and reverb and delay
I'm serious. I think you'd be good at it
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No.55061
>>55060
johnny, methwife is calling
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No.55063
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>55059
like this little shitty thing I made one night.
I wrote lyrics to it, also
but I was really just messing around with the music
It's crap
and it was fun as fuck
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No.55064
>>55061
actually, she has the new SAMSUNG GALAXY METHPIPE 3000
it's got 128 gigs of meth
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No.55065
Seriously, Superman......
you should fuck around with creating your own music
Just to kill time..
For nobody other than yourself...
It's really fun
And it doesn't matter if it's good or bad
Because it doesn't matter if anybody likes it or not
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No.55066
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
It's not made to entertain other people
Art is made to entertain yourself
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No.55067
>>55059
I guarantee your music would be WAAYYY better than my crap
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No.55069
I wrote that song about my cat dying
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No.55071
In case you weren't paying attention....
I was strongly urging you to buy Dr Bronner's peppermint soap....
It's going to help your skin
Trust me....
It's going to help you....
I'm out of Dr Bronner's right now
Oh well here I go
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No.55074
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
My shit is GARBAGE, dude.....
you should easily be able to make cooler weird shit
DO IT !!!!
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No.55078
>>55045
Stop controlling my mom
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No.55079
I'd appreciate if you didn't put me to sleep so frequently too
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No.55145
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No.55146
>>55079
walk around the block once every 4 hours
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No.55359
joe has been biden his time, waiting for his chance at power. and now all he can do is nap. Ironic.
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No.55665
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No.55686
>>54788
fun fact: Biden is a figurehead used in the "us vs them" mematics which keep international billionaires in power
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No.55784
>>55686
international billionaires have miscalculated this time. close to nuclear war, supply lines twisted, public sentiment turning against Israel in us despite 'organic' attacks.
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