No.100225
I've seen a lot of shit in my life, and some of it was bewildering, like the time I saw a UFO from approximately 45 feet away...
but in 1997 I witnessed something that left me befuddled.
☆☆☆THE FLASH OF LIGHT☆☆☆
____________________________
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No.100226
100% TRUE STORY :
in late 1997, my wife and I were in our apartment late one night, and we realized we had to go to the convenience store to buy cigarettes.
we walked out of our apartment, and down the pitch black hallway to my car parked out back...
AGAIN: the lights in the hallway were turned off, and the only light was a dim glow from the window at the end of the hallway..
she was walking directly in front of me... I was in tow, directly behind her, as we walked down the dark hallway..
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No.100227
then suddenly there was a flash of light brighter than a camera flashbulb
because I was behind my wife, I could see the circumference and source of the light... IN FRONT OF HER
at waist level
She was silhouetted by the light, so I knew it was in front of her, and I could see the light source, at her waist level
I thought she had flashed a camera or something...
that's when she asked me "what did you just do?"
she thought the light had come from ME
the FLASH OF LIGHT came from HER ABDOMEN
a week later, she discovered she was pregnant
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No.100228
WE BOTH CAME TO REALIZE
THE LIGHT HAD COME FROM HER WOMB
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No.100229
years later, I researched it
and I learned that LOTS of women have reported this flash of light after a child has been conceived inside them
I'm certain it happens more often than ppl realize, because if it happened in the daytime, you might not even see it
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No.100230
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No.100231
what we saw wasn't just a spark
it was just like the old fashioned flash cubes on the old fashioned cameras
there was NO SOUND, just a super bright flash
it only lasted a millisecond, just like a flash cube, and we never saw it happen again
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No.100257
Guess what?
NOBODY GIVES A FUCK!
Nobody cares about anything you're interested in, assburger boy. Nobody reads your autistic ramblings.
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No.100259
Notice that I'm not postulating about the actual physics behind the blinding flash of light that came from my wife's abdomen late that night....
I've had many many years to contemplate it... like I said, it happened in 1997
I've bounced around every possible Theory... and I definitely developed one Theory that I'm pretty certain is correct....
But I'm not going to tell you what to think about it
All I'm telling you isit's 100% TRUE
A millisecond blinding flash of white light emanated from my ex-wife's abdomen light one night, and we found out she was pregnant just a few days later...
You're free to form your own theories
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No.100261
>>100257
You were correct when you said you wouldn't know anything about this, because you've never gotten a woman pregnant before, and you've never even seen a woman naked in real life before.
I couldn't agree with you more.
What would you know about flashes of light coming from women's abdomens when they conceive a child?
The last time you were "in the same room with a naked woman", you were falling out of her vagina.
You are absolutely right, sir!
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No.100262
>>100257
Of course your attention span isn't capable of registering a spark, if the topic involves women.
of course YOU have no interest in 'anything involving females, because you're an edgemeister
an edgemeister who has never seen a vagina
and is too afraid to try
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No.100263
>>100257
Go ahead and fasten your seatbelt, because we're going to put you through college today...
Okay.. there are men.. and there are women...
The way the human race exists involvesmen having sex with women
YES.....
Women like having sex, too
Believe it or not, women will invest their lives into a man's life, and together, they become a unit that tackles the world...
YEP !!!....
Not two men.. that doesn't work
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No.100264
>>100257
HERES HOW THAT WORKS:
For a man to have sex with a female, he must first stand up and WALK AWAY FROM HIS COMPUTER
That's right, Romeo
I'm afraid you've got to turn off your little sissy boy computer and actually pick your fat soft lazy ass up out of that seat
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No.100265
>>100257
I'm afraid you're going to have to stop making excuses, and start Manning Up, you sniveling little bitch
There's paraplegic guys out there with girlfriends
Even down syndrome guys get pussy, you stupid motherfucker....
Niggers and albinos and Siamese twins.. they still get pussy
But not you, right?...
nope not you...
Not you and your little computer
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No.100266
>>100257
nope.........
You and that effeminate little computer of yours, you don't have any time for females.. do you, Romeo?
Since finding a mate is the most basic of all human FUNCTIONS, that would make you fundamentallydysfunctional
anABNORMIE
You seem much more interested in focusing your energy on conversations with other similarly dysfunctional social and sexual failures, all of them being MEN...
You don't have time for an emotional and sexual life companion, because you're too busy being edgy, Mr edgemeister
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No.100267
>>100257
Unfortunately for you, it requires looking a woman directly in the face, smiling, and introducing yourself..
I know that seems like an insurmountable task to you, because it doesn't involve video games or image boards...
It doesn't happen in an app, and it will never happen on any website...
To have sex with a woman, you must first meet her face to face...
There isn't a cheat code, little boy
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No.100268
>>100257
so YES.........
I completely understand you have a built-in knee-jerk propensity to "poo-poo" anything that involves women, having sex with women, getting a woman pregnant, having kids, or doing anything heterosexual whatsoever....
YES.... I understand you have this problem
But believe it or not, just because you've never seen a vagina in real life, that doesn't mean you aren't able to learn and hear stories that teach you how real life works...
Just because no girl will give you the time of day, that's no reason to turn your nose up at a story, just because there's a pregnant woman involved, and I got her pregnant...
When you've learned how to introduce yourself without fucking up, I'll tell you how to get a woman pregnant....
I don't want to jump ahead too far
Obviously, you learn in baby steps
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No.100269
>>100257
At least you've got all the childish effeminate shit taken care of.. like videogames and imageboards and more videogames and pornography and videogames and Anime and videogames, right ?.....
It's not like there's any reason for you to even try finding a girl, because you wouldn't know what to do with her if she said yes
I guess you've decided to leave the manly stuff to people like me? That's very considerate of you
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No.100271
>>100257
here's what I'm willing to do for you:
if you find a female in real life that you'd like to start fucking, LET ME KNOW
And I will literally hold you by the hand and walk you through the process
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No.100469
Dude, nobody cares about your autistic ramblings.
Sorry about your luck there bud. Try somewhere else.
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