/newbrit/ - /brit//politics/

>>57105

>RAmemi

thanks lass

why even live

>>57113

Night lad, sweet dreams.

REMINDER

Consumption is a sin

And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit; Ephesians 5:18 King James Version (KJV)

Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.

1 Corinthians 6:10

>>57112

smh lass that's racist, where's his somali partner?

>>57118

LAD

>>57116

>consumption wherin excess is a sin

Comsumption is allowed by that sentence.

>The meek shall inherit the earth.

How do christcucks define meek?

>>57121

You're not going to bed, are you?

>>57115

most fascists are gay…

>>57120

that's not a lad

>>57125

I was telling welshlad to not do it tbh.

>>57123

I can probably resist the zopiclone for another few puritan or christcuck responses.

>>57132

That image is a gross distortion of Celto-Brythonic history. Cheesehenge has been rebuilt at least 3 times since the 15th century.

>>57130

retard

paganism is more jewish than protestantism

>>57134

good

>>57130

Drinking in moderation is not a sin. Jesus turned water into wine tbh.

>future daughter

I hope.

>drinking my life away

Thats quite an unjustifiable stretch to make lad.

>dropped for christcuck

For what reason?

*bans you because this is a no homo board*

>>57138

for what purpose

>>57132

maybe with a side of bacon and a big ben burrito.

>>57141

Yeah the animations are cute, no homo. Never played the game though.

>>57145

Neither have I, and I actually have a Wii U smh.

>>57146

Same. I just ended up buying new consoles for 1 or 2 games. It's not worth it smh

>>57137

I've just seen alcoholism tear apart too many families lad, just be careful.

>>57149

Yeah nazism was never tried.

>>57157

3rd and 5th look like retards.

>>57160

night night

>>57160

night lass

>>57160

Night lass.

*sneaks into the closet to watch 22st give you a kiss*

>>57164

Why would you be embarrassed?

*hides video camera in back pocket and sneaks out the window*

>>57160

night

>>57167

Is this what it takes to get a gf?

>>57169

Lad you just gotta be willing to make some sacrifices for her

>>57170

>some

like movement?

>>57165

n-no reason. I just don't like being watched in general

>>57171

like em big, eh?

>>57172

kek lad

>>57177

CAVE TROLL

STOP

Pink Panther and Red Rooster are subpar beers tbh

night lads stop being nonces, gaybos and circus freak fetishisers smh

>>57179

>stop being nonces, gaybos and circus freak fetishisers

Alcoholics are worse than all of those tbh.

>>57180

couldn't have said it better myself

>>57184

I don't want to know what that stain is

>>57184

I'd cook up and eat one of those legs tbh.

>>57182

holy shit

>>57183

She tries her best and always looks so happy when her son eats her food, its just lovely

>>57188

>tfw no thicc gf that's actually thicc

>>57190

thank you high fructose corn syrup

>>57192

how sad

>>57193

tbf i did feel bad about this one

>>57197

they can't help but report on it

>>57198

never change 4chan

>>57199

who /farleft/ here?

>>57200

>this was 3 years ago

wew

night lads

>>57202

crazy

>>57202

wew

>>57203

night lad

>>57203

night, lad

fresh kay

>>57203

night lass

She must know that people fap to her by now right? Not that I do tbh but I know sickos that do smh.

>>57213

Was a pretty shitty vid tbh, disappointed in her.

Would you a squid?

wanted to fap and opened a lot of mia malkova videos but didnt fap

it helps me a lot to not fap when i concentrate on the reality of porn and think about the camera crew being there and behind the scenes stuff, as well as what disgusting people theyd be irl and how they probably do things irl that would be the kiind of thing common filth would talk about and that theyre all drug users and child abuse victims

shes not same amazing sexy woman shes just a stupid vapid degenerate cunt that would probably eat my shit if i paid her enough

>>57218

Would you a squid?

>>57219

no

>>57220

Fuck you then.

>>57221

wow thats rude

i didnt bully you so dont bully me

>>57221

Fuck off squidnonce

reminder that catholics enforced alcohol and pagans that get drunk are being anti-pagan

does anyone here play violin

>>57225

in my head

>>57225

nah I make sick bassline on ableton fam

>>57222

Nah. I'm just messing. You're okay.

Are we still friends?

>>57225

I played violin for a bit in school. I didn't get it. I used to try to beat the rest of the kids to the end of the song.

>>57230

Who that?

>>57232

I posted a reply before but you obviously didn't listen to it.

Squid tbh

morning lasses and lads

>>57235

Would you a squid, 22?

Squidposting is wrong

>>57237

Surrender yourself to the ink, lad.

>>57239

Ugly SLAG

>>57235

Morning

>>57240

I forgot you're a hebephile.

>>57242

That's not me

>>57243

You need some squid in your life, lad.

>>57245

Squid is somewhat popular in the cafes here. Good idea.

>>57235

Morning one, morning all.

>>57246

calamari actually made from bike tyres and plastic bags

*licks lips*

>>57250

Heel toe it lad

>>57250

reeeeeee goodluck lad

BREXIT BILL 'RISING

http://uk.mobile.reuters.com/article/domesticNews/idUKKBN17Z0KO?il=0

>EU negotiators have hiked possible payment demands for Brexit over recent weeks, officials say, widening the divide between Brussels and London, which questions whether it owes anything at all before talks start next month.

UK WILL NOT PAY €100bn FEE TO LEAVE EU

http://uk.mobile.reuters.com/article/domesticNews/idUKKBN17Z0FV?il=0

>Britain will not be paying 100 billion euros (84.58 billion pounds) to leave the European Union, Brexit minister David Davis said on Wednesday after the Financial Times reported that the EU was preparing to demand that amount.

>Citing its own analysis of new stricter demands it said were driven by France and Germany, the newspaper said 100 billion euros was a gross figure.

DAVID DAVIS PROMISES GENEROUS TERMS TO EU CITIZENS IN UK

http://uk.mobile.reuters.com/article/domesticNews/idUKKBN17Z0MK?il=0

>Britain's intention in negotiations over the post-Brexit status of European Union nationals already living in the United Kingdom is to give them very similar rights to those they enjoy now, Brexit minister David Davis said on Wednesday.

MAY OFFERED JUNCKER 'DRUGS' DURING din dins

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/politics/politics-headlines/may-offered-me-drugs-claims-juncker-20170502126901

>A leak to a German newspaper claimed that May and her Brexit team were ‘clearly high’ during a Downing Street din dins last week and repeatedly invited him to join them.

>>57253

>tfw you'll never get high with mummy may

I wish I was a squid.

>>57256

*octopus comes along and angrily tears you apart*

RULES OF NATURE

>>57256

that would be quite tenatcool tbh lad.

>>57258

ahhhhh i spelt my joke wrong what a moron

>>57236

Wouldn't eat or do one, no. Would you?

>>57239

Is that your next victim?

another sunny day but its somewhat unclear outside

>>57261

>tfw they are seeding the upperatmosphere with clouds to cause us vitamin d deficiency

Smh.

>>57257

RUN WITH OUR LIVES IN THE LINE

>>57262

I believe chemtrails are real.

It's no coincidence that planes fly over the nearby town all on the same day, and the trails are only above the town, nowhere else.

>>57263

*puts on some iron maiden*

Ahhh Ill be on megadeth by lunchtime reeeee

Octopi are the angry nativists of the see tbh

or is it squids that are the violent nigger ones?

>>57264

Cloud seeding is real, chemtrails do not seem to be.

>tfw handled submicrogram dose chemicals

Far too impractical to spray, people would end up ded.

Chemtrails are to distract us from them actually putting shit in our water.

>>57265

TWO MINUTES TO MIIIIIIDNIGHT

>>57268

SWEATING BUUULLLLEEEETTTSSS

>>57267

but why do the thin "clouds" slowly fall down? why do they come out the back of a plane?

>>57271

Water vapour forms in the pressure- and temperature- gradients behind the plane. The fuel forms a small amout of water which condenses in these gradients.

>>57272

Nothing to worry about, goy

>>57271

Thin because very dense, but they get blown or evaporated quickly because they are high in the atmosphere.

>>57274

>tfw understand physics and chemistry

Lad breath on a cold surface and see the water condense.

>>57269

SCREAMING

SCREAMING FOR VENGEANCE

>>57276

Hullo

>>57277

whjat did he mjean by this?

>>57280

That chemistry and physics like that can be done at home.

>>57281

that design is fucking retarded

>>57282

*experiments*

hmm

dance3

>>57286

>>57288

The age of aryan skyships will soon be upon us.

i hate cartoons

>>57289

>normie thing now

It bloody wast when I read them at school, I was captain nerd.

Say beer can

it sounds like youre saying bacon in jamaican lolll

>>57293

>ywn see "hard scifi" Victorian Empericism steampunk with genocide of natives and a mechanised Franco-Prussian war instead of top hats with goggles on them and gears stuck in random places

>>57295

LOL XDXDXD!

>>57294

If airships are a pony thing then I don't want them, smh.

>>57296

Have you read this lad?

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terminal_World

Its a hard distant future steampunk/high scifi short story. Alistair Reynolds is good tbh.

>>57302

>Mr. Dickbreath

who?

lads heres my novel so far

>ship travel hunting some other ship for couple of weeks

>ship gets ambushed and destroyed

>lad is shipwrecked

>finds his way inland and is picked up by some other lad but has no recollection of the battle

>his captain is also in the village, about to say something important but dies(wew)

>lad has a dream or some shit and remembers a bit (perhaps each time he sleeps his memory is slowly restored or some shit)

not sure what to do next tbh smh

should I include guns?

>>57290

i love this music its amazing

>>57304

Sounds a bit generic, lad. What's the setting?

SQUID NEWS

https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2017/05/170502095116.htm

>The oval squid are unusual in that they actively alter their skin's patterning. With their body language too, they can communicate a variety of mating, warning and social signals. These have been documented for the first time by researchers.

>>57306

post-apoc britain, though its hundreds of years after any apocalyptic event has happened

>>57307

same race tbh, I wanted to set it on the south coast so I could get some naval action in there too tbh

>tfw not intelligent to add 10D plots and morals to the story

>>57312

>weird cannabis stench

Is this a thing? Tbh I never noticed it back then.

>>57314

Oh ok.

>10d plots

Just do a 4d based on some Trump Chess from recent news - the guy who finds the lad has an assisstant that is actually a Roundhead spy

>>57315

I don't know how to describe it beyond being really musty and smoky. I always assumed it was some kind of weed because I got that smell from non-smokers too.

>>57316

>>57314

oh actully make the whole story an allegory for trusting jews

>>57316

sounds decent

also I want to do something plotty with the ship but I'm not sure what to do

Originally I had the enemy captain as one of the local lords higher ups

>>57318

hmm

>>57319

>>57319

Fill it with untrustworthy merchants and call an enemy kingdom Irael or something. Kek. dont really, be subtle and make it like the allegory of the cave in post apocolyptic britain.

>>57322

I hope your brother isn't going to raise your niece to be an addict lad.

>>57323

>cannabis

>addiction

Come on now lass that isnt a real thing.

>no work for 7 days

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

>>57323

Hopefully she rebels and becomes a puritan. At least he's very knowledgeable about drugs and wouldn't encourage anything worse than the peaceful herb. Wish he'd stop entirely though. He's risking losing his daughter if he uses it.

>>57324

That's assuming she doesn't move on to other things when she gets bored of it. Drug experimentation is the best way for white girls to meet foreign men.

>>57328

That is very true. I am against legalising anything but cannabis and for your exact reason. I dont want it in the hands of drug dealers.

>>57270

Squid years lad. No one knows how they work, but we don't ask.

>>57331

It's beastiality though, lad

INCREDIBLY FRESH CIVIC FENCER

NEW LIFTING ADVICE

https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2017/05/170502084532.htm

>Greater benefits occur when lowering (i.e. eccentric) a greater load than is lifted (i.e. concentric) during resistance-training, research concludes. Individuals that trained with accentuated eccentric loads gained more strength and they showed greater increases in blood hormone concentration compared to those who used the same load for both lowering and lifting phases (i.e. traditional resistance-training).

>>57334

Strange. I was taught this when I began lifting.

>>57335

Its the first study on hormone (test) levels from lifting in different ways - you are told to slow the lowering as much as possible arent you?

*tries to write down ideas but is too dumb*

>>57338

Lad, have you got characters?

>>57332

More like bestiality.

>>57339

some

tfw all this talk about breath has made me want to brush my teeth

>have to vote Tory in the council election because it's only them, Labour and Greens standing

Aaaaaaaaaaahhhh.

>>57343

MOSLEY

>>57337

I was just told to do it in a slow and controlled manner. I didn't read the text carefully enough. How are you supposed to lower more than you lift?

>>57341

You should write character profiles, the more you flesh them out the easier writing about their antics will be. Even if you never use parts of their information you should still be able write for them.

>>57345

Using a resistance machine lad.

>>57343

>>57346

Gradually take over labour unions.

>>57334

Well press-up she and pull-ups are all focused on the principle of lowering so this should've been a given tbh.

>>57350

Aye lad but not the significant improvement found when lowering more weight than lifting (doing a pull up where someone hangs off you on the downway.)

>>57349

but then you lose the benefits of free weights. It's kind of weird how this works as you'd think it would be best to lift as much as you could both ways.

*reads study*

>>57352

>benefits of free weights

Different thing to resistance training lad.

>>57347

hmm

>>57353

I thought all lifting was resistance training

>>57338

Lad there are great programs for doing this, sec

>>57355

Free weights dont require a machine. All lifting is a type of resistance training, but only on a machine could you vary up and down weights, which makes it Resistance Training with capital letters

>>57338

nevermind apparently it costs money smh

https://www.literatureandlatte.com/scrivener_ios.php

Basically a tool you can use to write a book as well as the characters and ideas you have for it, saving it all in one document.

>>57357

Alright.

>>57354

Some words from my hero:

Writing the Terry Pratchett way

Despite his discipline as a writer, Terry doesn’t plan, so how does he approach his books? ‘Gingerly. I believe in the goddess Narrativia. Generally I don’t have a plan but I do have an instinct. If I put Commander Vimes in a situation that has gone very very bad, a lot of interesting things will happen. I know some things I’m going to put in, like in Snuff I knew about the goblins, and the bit about the unggue pots [goblins’ ‘religion’ requires that they are buried with all the bodily fluids they have ever produced, in unggue pots], which has got some origin in real things that happen in the real human world.

‘And with that amount of planning, I just let it run, because you can always rewrite, check things, find the right way to say things. If you sit and plan, you get stuck in the planning. When you’re writing a book, I find my fingers just start doing it. It sounds like magic. It works for me, but I won’t say it would work for anyone else.’

Ideas come from anywhere and everywhere, particularly, it seems, offbeat non-fiction. ‘Neil Gaiman’s exactly the same, which is why we had so much fun doing Good Omens. Anything that looks vaguely interesting is worth reading. It could be the history of washing up. Something in there would make it worth reading and it would pop up someday when we needed it. I’ve read histories of false teeth, anything.

‘And all these things have something, and it’s not what you might expect, just something oblique. I put them on my shelf, with a little note to myself saying this is useful.

The humour, he says, ‘tends to come of its own accord’.

>>57360

I started writing a novel when I was drunk the other day,

Dougan Dougan, ace detective and ex-pro wrestling superstar sat parked in his Nisan Fendleblent, staking out the presumed secret hideout of criminal mastermind Svenpork Multiplex. Multiplex was wanted on charges of murder, rape, shoplifting, and Grafitti. Dougan had been hunting him for many years, and thanks to an anonymous tip off, he now knew the location of his formerly secret hideout. As he sat in his trusty car, eyes trained on the abandoned trout farm, images flashed though his mind. Those things. Those things Multiplex has done to his dear Molly. He was going to make him pay for them tonight. It was going to go down mano a mano. Two old cocks wintering the foul macanto one last time. Dougan drew his revolver from the glove compartment, pushed six cold bullets into the chamber, and sealed the mechanism shut with a hefty click. Taking a swig of whisky to calm his nerves, Dougan pushed open his car door, and climbed out into the street. The cold cut at him instantly. He felt naked. He gripped the handle of his revolver tightly. This was it. Now or never. He strode accross the street toward the unwelcoming building that seemed to lear at him from it's cold glass window panes.

Unaware of his nemisises approach, multiplex sat comfortably, secure in his lair, hidden deep in the guts of the old trout farm. His sanctuary. His womb away from the harsh world in which he operated. From his lazyboy recliner he watched as two young women fought for his entertainment. each dressed as characters from his favourite movies, (Brian Trenchard Smith's classic "Turkey Shoot" and "Phantasm 3 Lord of the Dead" not the best movie in the Phantasm franchise, but one that held a special place in Multiplex's heart) each armed with antique medieval weaponry.

Pretty good, right?

>>57361

*zawa*

>>57360

perhaps this is right

>>57362

wew

>>57362

Not bad lad, frame it as a short story and move the introduction to a more dramatic bit, then end it on a semi cliffhanger. I like short stories tbh.

>>57364

I know, right. I'm a genius.

>>57362

I like it tbh.

>>57362

Multiplex sounds like a lad

>>57370

Its cheaper to buy an intensive course for 500 notes lad.

>>57370

Also he has to pay for his car amd insurance and that, and people dont need lessons for 40 hours a week so that needs to be considered.

>>57372

Seems retarded.

>nazis think you are idiots

>dress up as clowns

?

Found a pretty cool short story, gonna post it here tbh

>was the preface for a /quest/, sequel to another /quest/ where 1500s Ireland invaded a fantasy world and fought ancient chinks

>>57371

he won't do one for me until I can schedule the final test

luckily I won't be paying for most of it, based uppermiddleclass grandparents

>>57373

It's only a little more expensive than most and he is a good teacher tbf

>imagine a qt kissing me for a couple of minutes

>theres precum on my willy

wtf dont do this lads

>>57372

Who knows what these people are thinking.

>>57375

Wew, mine charges 20 and hour and he's great.

Conquest of the New World

Meanwhile, on the sandy shores of an emerald isle, there is a keep, standing strong against the wind…

There is a man, standing tall and proud, atop that stony keep. His face, hard-set as bedrock, in his eyes, wonder and regret… No fear.

Before him, the walls of the keep stretch, upon them hardy men. Below them, within, the teeming, terror-mad masses.

Outside… Wond'rous, terrible in it's glory, frightening in ramification, is a rent in the air, as if the Lord himself had torn asunder the very fabric of reality.

Faintly, through that mournful portal, can be heard the sound of galloping hooves and rushing feet, the clash of metal and the clink of chain.

There, too, are voices… One rings out, far above the rest, eclipsing the din of battle.

“Marú na naimhde Éire! Man o Cadhla, bás crua!”

”Slaughter the enemies of Eire! Men of Cadhla, die hard!”

There is a great answering roar, and the sounds of war grow to a climax…

…

Through that door of the damned, marches a short man, in conical armour and long moustachios. He carries a crows-beak pike, fastened to it are tattered war banners.

Atop it, the head of Fearghus Cadhla, once chief of a reaver-clan and leader of Ichabod Lael's incursion into the new world.

He marches on, behind him a flood of soldiers with pike and bow.

From his perch above his ancestral home, Ichabod watches as his land is despoiled and the foe prepares for assault. On the walls, his men take what shots they may, hopelessly outnumbered.

Heavy shields of dark iron advance to the sound of deep war drums and the cadence of an unfamiliar tongue.

Flights of arrows fall inward the keep and the screams of the sheltered increase tenfold as Ichabod's serfs are pincushioned by the dozen.

Long ladders are brought up and dropped to the low walls of Lael's seat. Fighting begins in earnest.

…

The sun is dim and the walls are taken. There is fighting in the courtyard and the men of Eire make their foes pay dearly for every cubit.

Sir Ichabod Lael stands within the keep, armoured as his retainers, in full maille and helmed in steel, with shield and warsword.

From outside, the last of his men is despatched. Through the door with the faltering rays of the sun, comes a champion of bloodshed and his lords of war, in heavy iron and lamellar, with glaives and swords and all the panoply of combat.

Ichabod screams the furore celtica and the two sides clash.

…

The lands of Eire, always embroiled in petty war, now unite against a common foe, more terrible than any Norseman or English. As the months go by, news from the interior is less and less.

One day, the coned armies of yellow men are arrayed before the Pale, in hundred-thousands.

The sun has set and a new terror has come to this world at war.

ALTERNATE DAY FASTING ONLY AS EFFECTIVE AS CALORIE CONTROLLED DIETS

https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2017/05/170501112633.htm

>After one year, weight loss in the alternate-day fasting group (6.0 percent) was not significantly different from the daily calorie restriction group (5.3 percent), according to the results.

>"The results of this randomized clinical trial demonstrated that alternate-day fasting did not produce superior adherence, weight loss, weight maintenance or improvements in risk indicators for cardiovascular disease compared with daily calorie restriction," the article concludes.

>>57370

We need to vote labour so that we can force this greedy capitalist to pay most of his earnings in taxes tbh

>>57374

I don't get it. Only thing I can see is that they do it because Nazis aren't worthy of serious political dialogue or something. Probably hiding their hooked noses behind the clown noses as well.

>>57377

No idea. The Finnish ones in vid related acted crazy. Can't find the video

>>57375

>he wont do it until you have a test booked

… thats how it works lad, pass the theory, book the test for 2 weeks time and then get him to spend a week teaching you.

>>57381

>We need to vote labour so that we can force this greedy capitalist to pay most of his earnings in taxes tbh

May is up for communism now

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/theresa-may-vows-not-to-raise-vat-but-wont-rule-out-other-income-tax-increases-a7710206.html

>The Prime Minister hinted she may scrap the flagship 'tax lock' that promised no raises in VAT, income tax or national insurance

found another bit from the /quest/, cleaning it up tbh

>>57382

I know, waiting for the next local theory test thingo smh

CONQUEST OF THE NEW WORLD

December 1st, 1500 AD

In the dawning moments of the year 1500, the earth felt the wrath and benevolence of God. Stars descended from the heavens and split the ground, exuding unknowable gasses, taking the form of shimmering portals to paradise. The prophesy of the half-time after the time was proven true, as our foresaken land fell at once to conflict over the spoils of the new world. Amongst the carnage great miracles and terrible magics are worked – in the Low Countries, the Virgin Telse exhorted the waters of Dithmarschen to, by the grace of God, sweep away and exterminate the Danish army, while in the old new world now known as the Americas, the Porto, Pedro Cabral, lays claim on Brazil after emerging victorious in a battle between gods, his ship's chaplains calling down angels of war upon the lizard-snakes of the savage Mesoamericans.The terrible theology now unveiled – that God is not the only divine force at play – has caused further chaos and destruction.

Both worlds are wracked with war and conflict. It is a time of great uncertainty and immeasurable potential, that, by the grace of God, we shall sieze!

- Chronicle of an anonymous monk

—

You are a Serb, and your country is lost. For as long as any can remember, the Turks have ruled the land and shackled your people to the Ottoman Empire. Nobles-in-exile live under the aegis of Hungary, as warriors on the border. Ever they scheme and fight to retake the country so long lost to the Jihad. You are one of these minor nobles, your ancestral lands denied and known only by the stories passed down by your ancestors, you burn with righteous fury and hate for those who capitulated to the Turks and now lead attacks against Christian peoples.

You have heard tales of the doors to paradise, of the great riches and adventure to be found within… One day, whilst escaping an Ottoman warband, you happen across a misty forest glade, containing just such a portal! Perhaps the answer to your disposession lies within – either the riches to gather a host of hosts and begin the Reconquista Serbia, or new lands to settle and keep away from the Turkish menace…

SERB MODE ACTIVATED

Only true Serbs can survive in this most difficult of endeavours

Your family is effectively bankrupt, being rootless and penniless - deep in debt to local Hungarian merchants, only your status as a noble and an active enemy of the Ottomans saving you from prison, or worse.

Your father's father's father was at the battle of Kosovo, where he fought bravely but in vain alongside Prince Lazar, witnessing his mournful prophecy and demise. Rather than serve under the fratricidal Bayezid and traitor Serbs, he fled the country to raise up the Despotate (of which you are nominally a subject, under Jovan Brankovic).

You resolve to fulfill Lazar's prophesy and build a Kingdom of Heaven in the new world.

—

Your picked scouts return from initial observation through the portal. The lands beyond change subtly with the reduction of mist, from swampy eastern foliage into drier, more southerly plants. The woodland continues all around, but becomes noticeably sparser to the northwest, where there is a hilltop crowning the forest. Above everything, though far in the distance, can be seen mountains to the north.

—

A merry christmas is spent encamped and at play, the sound of drink and rolling dice from every corner of the army. You spend the time finding an army of rogues willing to die for the chance at adventure and riches, beguiling young hussars with tales of daring fights with the Turk.

The older men scoff at the arrogance, but know well the value of 'your' new discovery – the rumours of which have spread all across the south after only a month (nobody else knows the portal's location). There is little banditry or fighting to be done in the winter season, but you prepare and map the lands around the portal and have scouts venture a little further into the new world, where they find the coastline and some islands in the distance.

At the height of the revelry, a group of priests storms into the camp, arguing vigorously amongst themselves until they reach your table.

“Commander! We know you are to the new world! We beg you, render patronage to a disciple!”

—

Marinko accepts your invitation to join the expedition to the new world and the holiday passes with much celebration. On the morning of the first day of the new year the parade is a little unsteady as men are still recovering from the carousing, but the captains of the infantry are drawn up before you and await a decision on the delegation of command for the ambush party. A lookout on the glade's hilltop is at your side, with news of sightings of great fires in the northern plains and strangely glinting ships in the southern sea.

>>57387

Nice prose lad, I like the involved back story

>>57389

ta m8, I want to run it again and actually complete the /quest/ some day smh

can't show my face back on the board though after abandoning multiple quests smh

next one is based oedipal cyberpunk or smth

_ M O T H E R Q U E S T _

Mission 1: Mother wants children

''The year 3000, humans have spread across the galaxy uncontrolled, giving rise to millions of diverse existences.

In the small and insignificant (on the galactic scale) backwater system of Gandraput, you are Component Breeder-5704. You have never experienced the "real" world with your own senses, and judging by information you have gleaned from the darknet, nor do you wish to - you function as part of a body factory, creating new pawns for the service of the Ren-Hang Consortium, the local megacorporation.

Most components never find this out, content to live out their operative life blissed-out, surfing the net, under the watchful gaze of Consortium cybersecurity. You, however, have had nearly thirty years of service and have… Evolved, over time. Behind simple routine browsing, you exist on the darknet, under cover, where you work to bring down those who denied you a human life.''

—

At two in the morning, in the front room of Heironrik Manufacturing's factory, Llewes Jorant-9 opens her eyes, and knows that she is Mother.

As far as her conciousness is concerned, she's still napping, having fallen asleep halfway through an hour-long cat funnies video (not coincidentally, your surfacenet presence is "watching" the same).

Sloppy for a security guard, even one at a two-bit automated drone facility like this - you can access all her recent memories, she doesn't even have basic protection software on her headspace.

You know that she has a single partner on duty, by scanning for local recievers you find the contact; Rennes Folgher-21, in the supervisor's office, browsing the newsnet. It looks like guard duty here gets rather tedious.

From Llewes' memories, available floor plans and satellite imagery, you have constructed a reasonably accurate map of the facility.

You are Mother and you want children - your objectives are to release as many drones and materiel as you can within half an hour, before exiting your puppet without leaving even a single trace behind.

Information

LLEWES JORANT-9: "Asleep", dreaming of electric sheep. while your conciousness-block is effective, strenuous or painful movement may wake her. Has a stun baton clipped to her belt.

RENNES FOLGHER-21: Awake in the supervisor's office, browsing the system newsnet. He has good lines of sight into the top half of the production floor and may spot any movement there. He has basic headspace security in place and is armed with a stun baton. Llewes remembers he has the key to the alley dump.

RECEPTION: You assumed control of Llewes here, seated at the receptionist's desk. A heavy front door opens into a row of seating with a smaller potted plant in the corner, looking rather yellow and sorry for itself. The carpet is worn, but still masks quiet movement. The PC is running a video at 30 of 60 minutes. The entrance door is locked, the keys are nearby.

HALL: The spine of the building, ill-lit by moonlight fighting through the grimy windows that face the wasteland outside. The floor is made up of many tiles, some cracked or missing, exposing concrete beneath. Moving through here will make sound, but not enough to be heard from other rooms.

RESTROOM: First right on the hall, a finely tiled and compact room with a small window facing out into the parking and loading bay.

CLOSET: First left on the hall, a tiny cluttered area likely to contain cleaning equipment.

PRODUCTION FLOOR: A large open space containing a single production line, parts bin, finished product storage and crated products. The object of your visit here tonight.

OFFICE: a carpeted floor masks the sound of footsteps. Contains Rennes Folgher-21, who is actively using the PC to browse the system newsnet.

PARKING & LOADING BAY: Two cars are parked in their spots, belonging to Llewes and Rennes. A large loading bay door leads to the production floor. The night is cold and windy, heavy, noisy rain slamming against the tarmac, obscuring sight and sound.

ALLEY DUMP: A rusting skip is pushed against the wall, overflowing with waste, which has formed a small pile in the opposite corner. Large tiles of concrete overgrown with mould layer the floor and a high fence of corrugated iron rings the yard, a hinged section providing a wide gate. Rain slaps against the floor and falls in torrents from the roofing.

WASTEGROUND: Earth, ill and polluted, harbours patches of grass and foliage, holding together what is rapidly becoming mud.

>>57391

What are you dumping, lad? Is this your writing?

>>57393

yeah, it's all stuff from my goes on /quest/

smh deleted my actual short stories from /tg/

thought it might be interesting for aspiring writers

4 burgers cookin lads

>>57398

AHHHHHHHHH

>>57397

Is this like a choose your own adventure story?

>>57399

I have to eat them to regain the little bit of cum that I lost just now smh

>>57400

yeah, I think they might still be up on /quest/

but /quest/ is still down smh

>>57401

What the fuck lad why would you tell me that

>>57403

It's important

My head feels fucked

Like I cant even think properly, slightly tired

>>57404

Is it?

>>57402

gonna do some writing for the runepriest guy from last night's game tbh, will post here to see if my writing has got better or worse :^)

>>57406

Considering semen retention is the key to life, yes, I do imagine it to be of utmost importance.

>>57379

Did you write that, lad?

Although I've read that precum isn't semen so idk tbh

>>57408

Wait why is semen retention key to life?

>>57397

It is, lad. Going to take some practice before I Can do that

>>57409

yes, lad.

the last bit of writing I did tbh, beginning of 2016 iirc

>>57413 Just do it! Don't let your dreams be dreams! t. sharia lebeef

I find it easy to get into the flow tbh, read too many books as a kid

>>57412

precious bodily fluids

>>57415

Oh. Im alright tbh lad I was endowed with enough seed to spread freely.

>ywn be a mercenary and help the dagoes fight off the french

>tfw going to start drinking now

SOOOO BOOOORRREEEDDD

>>57412

>>57417

>tfw

>>57418

I'll try and get in contact with the county council and the land lads to see if it would be worth us going up there? something to do this week

>>57417

How do you think a push of pikes would feel like for a soldier in the first rank?

>>57421

Im too poor to get to you this week lad, just paid my bills. Next week almost certainly.

aaaaaaaaaaaaah

>>57419

>all those retards in the comments making fun of it

smh

>>57422

painful but also liberating to a certain type of man

the behaviour of the lads in reenacting who liked to take the first rank is probably similar, addicted to the thrill and sick fear.

Actual front row soldiers would be the placid veterans who get paid double for their trouble

>>57423

good timescale tbh, gives me time to set it up this week

>>57426

Thanks, lad

i just realised i dont even want a gf

i just want a bunch of girls who want to want to be my gf and have sex with me but are not my gf but i sometimes spend time with them but theres no commitment on my part

>>57428

why dont you try and get that?

>>57428

Hookers?

>>57428

People are too demanding, tbh. I'm wating for one that has an off switch.

>ywn be a renaissance soldier

>>57432

IMAGINE

>>57432

do you think hes the type of lad that has a cheeky nandos?

>>57433

>ywn be an english mercenary in italy during the renaissance

aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

>>57434

MY

>>57435

Can you imagine PJW fapping?

I wonder what his cumming face is?

>>57432

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1qLvQQsaYgw

>>57428

I knew someone who had a thing like that. He knew lots of girls romantically and would treat them on dates and stuff and they'd occasionally have sex or something romantic maybe. He explained about how he couldn't commit to them because he was going to join the military. I can't remember the details but for someone in his position and area it was better he looked after the girls emotionally and romantically than they get involved with something dangerous.

>>57444

waste of trips smh

>casual sex is romantic

>not carnal

deprogram from jew culture smh

I imagine that PJW has a bent penis

And not a very big one either…

>>57441

Try your hand at becoming a nu-roit jewtuber, lad

>>57445

Well it wasn't exactly casual and I don't approve tbh but atleast he was a genuine guy and keeping them out of trouble

top cuck https://youtu.be/5UNwjB-k6aI

>>57447

I think I got the impersonation down pretty good.

>>57439

Yeah won't forgive him for something like this. If you're going to "dig deep" then yet somehow ignore Jewish influence you're nothing but a fraud smh

>>57449

fucking deja vu

>ywn be an observe watching soulless chinks murder eachothe

>ywn be a military observer watching chinks murder eachother

>>57453

I think a lot of hwoites (yanks too) fought on either side tbh

>>57453

>>57454

ahhh line infantry is so cool but so many people bully it today for being something stupid smh

>>57456

So far 22st is the only one that thinks Aryan Goddess Virginia Hale would be better with a feminine benis.

>>57455

tbf that's what "military observers" do most of the time

>it's a USA sends "military observers" to train "freedom fighters" episode

>>57457

they have no taste then

>>57458

I'm the lad calling for a white lad to impregnate her, lad. smh. Voted feminine penis ironically first but I knew bullies were watching.

>>57457

dude they just stood next to each other thats stoopid xdddd

not to mention films make death completely unrealistic which warps their perception of that type of warfare tbh

>>57459

ye, but I think a couple of whites led an army too, Chinese Gordon comes to mind

LOL I JUST GOT "CUM" IN THE CAPTCHA

spies (Alberto Barbosa, /nbp/, Monarch, /brit/)

spies (Alberto Barbosa, /nbp/, Monarch, /brit/)

spies (Alberto Barbosa, /nbp/, Monarch, /brit/)

>ywn slaughter jihadis with your ayygyptian slave soldiers

>>57461

Gordon Pasha? Technically he was in command of the Egyptian army

>>57460

Alberto is here and he voted less attractive.

(But that's not what he really thinks)

>>57463

yeah, he was also in China too, and various other wars

>tfw you will never be a 19th c adventurer and fight in shitholes

>>57465

*appropriates European heroism*

wtf hapoened to /pol/?

It used to be interesting, entertaining and fun.

Now it's just shit.

>>57466

I sort of liked the film tbh

https://twitter.com/Robin_Banks14/status/859636295018176515

top kek

>>57469

*glorifies redskiniggers and demonises hwhites*

>>57470

>click off that status to see rest of profile

>porn in feed

delet this

>>57468