/mental/ - Mental Health, Illnesses and Disorders

Also fuck /r9k/ and fuck that wordfilter. I just meant to say at the moment.

>>14386

Yeah. I went through something similar when I dropped out of my abusive catholic private school and I was under intense pressure to find something else. Even though I knew hell was waiting for me if I left that cage I still did it. I also had no motivation to work and was still full of hatred and hopelessness. It felt like everything good was over and I now can just keep suffering in a low position. But yeah that was 2 years ago now. I found some place where working is bearable with some luck and help ultimately though.

My therapy was shit but the meds helped me not wanting to kill myself constantly. And now I have somehow managed to bear with my situation. I got many certificates for my mental condition and state supported facilities helped me find a suitable job. I work part time in a hospital now (ironic I know) but yes. My advice is: Try to make your now restrained life as an mentally troubled adult as easy as possible. Contact any support you can get and do any trick you can fir easing things up. Fuck honor and your pride for this for a while. Just try to get back on land to keep yourself from drowning.

It has worked well for me… Life ain't great but I am not suicidal anymore. My colleagues are used to my social anxiety and don't mistreat me. I probably was rather lucky after my high ambitions a dreams crashed… but I hope you can get something similar friend.

Good luck. And fuck the word filter indeed.

>>14389

Thanks. Funny you mention it because I also dropped out of an abusive catholic private school. I suppose I can try to see what can be done first rather than jumping the gun on suicide.

>>14386

>>14390

In a similar boat, but I dropped out of a protestant school. I might move to my uncle's farm if worst comes to worst, he's getting old so I've got a good excuse to go there and help out instead of actually getting a job. Problem is because I haven't had a job in so long he might think I have a shit work ethic, but mainly my problem is I hate the socializing that comes with work.

>I must be FORCED to see beautiful women, kind, innocent, some of them perhaps even virgins

This is the worst. Even though I try to distract myself from 3dpd I can't help but still feel somewhat attracted to them, even though I despise all of them and how society seems to encourage them to act like whores. I wish that there was a qt modest tomboy gf somewhere out there for me, but I literally drive that type of person away with my looks and my attitude.

Also, what word is filtered? Is it a t m?

>>14393

As I recall, it was right.now

Testing >>>/r9k/ brought me here!

>>14390

> I also dropped out of an abusive catholic private school.

Heh. The world is small isn't it… Welp. The one thing I don't regret is leaving that shitty school with all those toxic people behind. Glad my advice did something for you. I am not good at this usually. Just could relate to that story.

>>14394

What an odd thing to filter.

>>14398

Well, this is an odd board after all.

Holy shit guys. I know life has it out for me but this is just ridiculous. Today I decided to try and improve my mood and relationship with family, by going out with them to a town fair. It's pretty boring but whatever, I'm outside, not rotting in my basement corner, and spending time with my family, so maybe they'll be a little more lenient on me when we get to talking about work soon. And who do I see but my oneitis. Yep didn't mention that in the OP but I have had a oneitis for around three years. This is easily the most incredible girl I've encountered; I could go on forever about how much I'm into her. She's one in a million, beautiful, kind, virgin, in fact no experience with guys AT ALL. Nice body, decent breasts, cute face, pale white girl with long blonde hair and blue eyes, almost as tall as me (I'm a bit above average for a guy). I know it sounds unbelievable that someone like that exists but it's all true, even (to the best of my knowledge) the part about never having been with a guy. This is the only girl who's ever felt…special to me. Of course in my world, she exists only to torment me, with an ideal that I can never reach. Why do I say this? Just last month I worked up the courage to finally ask her out, after years of anxiety and thinking of her, trying my hardest to overcome self-hate and depression and total incompetence, and "just do it bro." I exercised for months, I took good care of my hygiene, I tried my damnedest not to be awkward or creepy. And she rejected me. This was a hard rejection, with basically no room for interpretation. I suffered from psychosis for a few days after and even though I've calmed down since then, it still affects me when I think about it all. Now, to see her today, just when I'm trying to start to regain some small measure of hope, is like a punch in the gut. Being rejected by her almost pushed me over the edge for real.

I know this sounds like the ramblings of a teenager but I'm 21 now. I'm 21 and I've never been with a woman. The most I've ever gotten is a kiss from an ugly, literally (diagnosed) autistic Jewish girl in high school, who dumped me shortly after because I "didn't have that spark." Why the fuck does life create such hopeless specimens like me? Why does it love to torture me like this? Seriously, to run into my oneitis like this, on this fucking day, is the cruelest thing. She talked to my sister for a little bit and I just had to stand by, and try not to make her uncomfortable by doing anything strange. The last thing I want is for her to know how much she affected me with the rejection. I would never wish any kind of unhappiness or harm on her. But seeing her all of a sudden like that almost broke me. Now I am sitting at home again, in my shitty little basement corner, while my parents make obscene amounts of noise as usual. Tomorrow they are probably going to get on my ass about finding work like they planned. I just don't know what to do. I feel like I'm losing my mind. Mixed signals from everywhere and I'm clearly not supposed to be happy. I wish I could just hide here forever but my parents will kick me out or have me locked up (they've threatened such in the past) before long if I tried that. I have to focus on the chance that I find some tolerable work, and can move far away from here. Far away from my broken dreams, and just try to live a hedonistic existence alone. I'll almost certainly fall into alcoholism like my father but at least I won't reproduce. I'm determined to end this cycle of shitty genes and failure. Now that my oneitis has rejected me, I am at least certain about this much. Nobody else could compare to her anyway. In 20 years no one was even remotely close. As if I'm going to settle for trying to lure mentally ill obese gold-digging mystery meat whores. No, I got that signal loud and clear. YOU ARE NOT MEANT TO EXPERIENCE THE JOY OF LOVE. Message received, but you didn't have to rub it in like that, asshole. God damn.

Fuck dude. I just can't express how much this girl meant to me. She was like my way out, my escape from all this shit and sewage that's been bogging me down for my entire life. Hell, get this, I even thought we were destined for each other, she just seemed so perfect to me. As if she was an angel who came here to save me. She even likes fucking video games dude. Not like a "le girl gamer plays League of Legends" but legitimate, feminine interest in games such as Animal Crossing and Cooking Mama. I'm telling you guys this is a real, genuine human being I've come across, not some fake piece of shit like all the fat whores on the street at that shitty fucking town fair. What fucking girl is perfect in looks and personality, has matching interests to mine, and isn't a fucking whore in today's world? Is the chance even close to 1%?

Can you fucking believe it? I'm such a moron. Why would someone like that even be interested in me? Of course it's obvious that if she's the best, she deserves the best, too, and that's most certainly not me. In fact I should be happy, happy that she doesn't have to be weighed down by my issues and my shitty personality, or embarrassed by my lack of social skills and status. Now she can find a handsome prince to sweep her off her feet like she deserves, not some sweaty beta wannabe tryhard like me who can't even fulfill basic normal functions. But for the love of god I need these shitty humans in my house to shut the fuck up for five fucking seconds so I can get a goddamn thought through my head.

Executive Dysfunction.

There can be several things to be wrong with you if it's that severe.

https://www.healthline.com/health/executive-dysfunction

>>14404

You were acting needy anon.

and you dont view yourself in a positive light.

you need to get some slop from some thot. Let her see you around other desirable women. Let her know its her loss.