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/kind/ - Random Acts of Kindness

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 No.25504[Watch Thread][Show All Posts]

Recently selfishness and jealousy were the two main reasons I destroyed a friendship with two people I became very close to. The very people that were helping me I betrayed I didn't use my head at all I ruined everything it won't go back to normal at all. I could not let go of them they needed to let go of me, it could have been easy but I made the situation worse by acting against them after they cut ties with me.

They may have come back to me after I sorted myself out but I kept making this worse and kept cutting wombs deeper and deeper till they left scars that will be noticeable forever. Back of their mind they'll always think of me now with hate and disgust. I nearly destroyed their reputation because I was angry and didn't want to let go they had every right to leave after how I was behaving towards them.

They talked about their life all the time and I just got more jealous every single day I should have cut ties and ended it at that or took a long break from them and got myself under control but no I went to far like I usually do I am a person of extremes and I hurt two people that cared for me very much. We had a good relationship going but I can't just go back in time and make everything alright. /Kind/ I want to be a better person I never want do like what I did again. I came close to ruining their lives because of stupid feelings I should have not let rule over my life.

Redemption what can I do to get redemption?

How do I not let such nasty emotions ruin my relationships in the future?

How can I be a kind and a good friend to people that will come into my life in the future so I no longer hurt anyone ever again?

 No.25511>>25524

Righting the wrongs you've done might be difficult if they refuse to have any contact with you at all. But time heals all wounds, and I wouldn't give up just yet. I would start by doing what you can to undo the damage you did to their reputation. If you've been talking to other people about them, maybe you can find those people and tell them what you did. Or publicly take responsibility somehow. That would be a great gesture, and improve how they see you. Maybe they'll even consider being friends again some day, but if not, then you've at least restored your karma balance, so to speak.

Nasty emotions can be a bitch to control. I have problems with being overbearing and emotionally blackmailing people who are close to me. The important thing is to recognize that you do these things. Then you'll be able to stop yourself when you do. Although, the difficult part is always figuring out whether your emotions are due to your problems, or a reaction to something legitimate (e.g. justified). Take a step back and let the long-term thinking part of your brain turn it over, never do anything rashly.

I hope you can be good to the people you care about. Try to remember how it made you feel when you failed. Use it as a learning experience, and that'll help you be more kind.


 No.25514

>>25512

If you have to advertise, at least choose a thread where it's somewhat relevant.


 No.25515

>>25513

>>25512

stop being bully


 No.25516>>25519

>>25512

Please find another board to spam.


 No.25519>>25520 >>25537

>>25516

what's with the mailto:sage? is that some kind of namefriendging?


 No.25520>>25537

>>25519

>what is google?

Spoonfeeding is /unkind/, and enables laziness.


 No.25524>>25541

File (hide): 1451693113875.jpg (202.62 KB, 1104x1521, 368:507, 1388911249.jpg) (h) (u)

>>25511

>I would start by doing what you can to undo the damage you did to their reputation. If you've been talking to other people about them, maybe you can find those people and tell them what you did. Or publicly take responsibility somehow.

I was caught in the lie when I came close to ruining their lives, glad that happened it ended before it could get worse so their not the only ones that want to keep a great distance from me and avoid me like the plague. I don't think I could personally sort out what happened between me and them.

I just know more people will come into my life and I never want to do this to anyone again. I can't stand the thought of this being possibly a permanent problem that will destroy more relationships in the future I need to work on my emotions while I am alone right now so when new people come into my life I'll be in control enough to never do this again.

>I have problems with being overbearing and emotionally blackmailing people who are close to me.

I have similar problems, I have emotionally blacked mailed many times and jealously most of all has put a strain on a lot of relationships.

>The important thing is to recognize that you do these things. Then you'll be able to stop yourself when you do. Although, the difficult part is always figuring out whether your emotions are due to your problems, or a reaction to something legitimate (e.g. justified).

I take full responsibility for what I did, and I may never forget this. My emotions are a problem these two did nothing to deserve this I should have taken it out through different means at something else rather than the people that cared about me.


 No.25537>>25543 >>25580 >>25581


 No.25541

>>25524

> I don't think I could personally sort out what happened between me and them.

Being kind in this case, isn't about the results. It's about putting in the effort.

Maybe you need to wait a few days or weeks, but I'm sure you can find someone who will listen.

>>25524

>I take full responsibility for what I did, and I may never forget this.

Just don't cling to the feelings of guilt too much, okay friend? Being too hard on yourself can mean falling into a cycle of self-hatred and self-pity.


 No.25543

File (hide): 1451739465184.jpg (177.16 KB, 500x488, 125:122, Shima-edit01.jpg) (h) (u)

>>25537

I don't think I've ever wanted to bully a nerd this badly.


 No.25580>>28479 >>28486

File (hide): 1451797000712.webm (6.14 MB, 570x240, 19:8, #equality.webm) (h) (u) [play once] [loop]

>>25537

wow GNU people word police just like SJWs


 No.25581>>25582

>>25537

GNU sure is uptight.


 No.25582>>25585

>>25581

>GNU

ian murdock is dead


 No.25585

File (hide): 1451801617606.webm (566.32 KB, 480x360, 4:3, 8christian explains the i….webm) (h) (u) [play once] [loop]

>>25582

debian is just mostly licensed under the GPL, and Ian wasn't involved with it anymore


 No.28479

>>25580

But using words correctly ensures clear communication between people. Misusing words just creates misunderstanding between people, which then takes more time to clear the misunderstanding. It's like those people that say "evolution is just a theory"; their interpretation of the word "theory" is different from its actual meaning.


 No.28486

>>25580

I thought the gnu guide was more trying to encourage people to avoid using terms that prop up effective monopolies.

By saying google instead of search results in people only using google as you dont search the internet you google it.

Another term there was skype. Most people would never think of alternatives to skype like linphone, empathy or jitsi as they don't think "video call" they think "skype" when wanting to video call someone because that's all they see everyone else using.

Since the free software foundation actively protests non-freedom respecting software they would obviously ask people to be more conscious about what words they use if they too want to encourage use of software that doesn't spy on you. But unlike SJWs they aren't going to attack you or try have criminal charges pressed against you for using words they don't like. All the pedanticism likely results from the nature of programming being quite pedantic attracting people who act similarly.

Sorry for longposting.




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