College student here, why do all the online diet planning guides call for lobster dinners and other ridiculous shit that only welfare niggers can afford?Can you help me build a 3000 calorie diet plan out of eggs, milk, apples, and freezer vegetables? E

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File: c0fa6c147ead7ed⋯.png (164.97 KB, 394x371, 394:371, autistic-screecher-creatur….png)

/fit/izen 01/29/18 (Mon) 03:54:18 No.133172

College student here, why do all the online diet planning guides call for lobster dinners and other ridiculous shit that only welfare niggers can afford?

Can you help me build a 3000 calorie diet plan out of eggs, milk, apples, and freezer vegetables? Else how can I get anabolics since nothing I do yields any results at all ever? The inability to progress past first-day-at-the-gym-mode is killing my self esteem.

I can:

bench 170lbs for 10 reps max

squat 80lbs for 10 reps max

run about 3/4 of a mile before my saliva turns to cement and my lungs spontaneously combust (might have asthma?).

I weight ~170lbs

24 years old

tired of being small

help me

/fit/izen 01/29/18 (Mon) 10:18:41 No.133190

What the fuck is wrong with your legs, you can bench twice your squat. Drink a gallon of milk and you're set.

/fit/izen 01/30/18 (Tue) 01:21:15 No.133214

File: 60924bb0a9072d8⋯.png (159.29 KB, 497x456, 497:456, burnt out chinese man deal….png)

>online diet planning guides

What the fuck are you doing. You don't need a diet plan. Set your calorie goal, set your macro split. Then stick with the brofood basics

>lean protein

Chickentits, turkey breast, lowfat quark

>good carbs

Oats, brown rice, wholegrain pasta

>fiber

Oats, broccoli, spinach

>good fats

Olive oil, linseed oil, peanut butter, peanuts, walnuts

Buy all of this stuff in bulk. Then you arrange a couple of simple meals

>Fried turkey breast, wholegrain spaghetti, broccoli, maybe tomato sauce or something

You can vary the protein, the carb and the vegetable in this meal. Then if you need additional snacks eat lowfat quark with oats or some sort of fruit or muesli, eat oats with just boiled water, eat peanuts. You can just wing this shit, before your last meal take a look at your calorie tracker and fill out your macros as needed.

Cheap as fuck, pretty tasty, 10/10 macros, 10/10 vitamins and shit as long as you take a multivitamin.

/fit/izen 01/30/18 (Tue) 02:02:39 No.133221

>>133172

>(might have asthma?)

No, depends on how fast you're running. I can do a mile piece of cake at 7mph. But when I'm running outside I wildly overestimate my speed and end up breaking my shins at 3/4 a mile.

>online diet planning guides

this is fucking retarded, listen to this dude >>133214 and check the other threads in the catalog relating to food and just use your best judgement.

>Can you help me build a 3000 calorie diet plan out of eggs, milk, apples, and freezer vegetables?

Ludicrous. You're not going to eat 3k calories of eggs, milk, apples, and freezer vegetables. Eat meat and fats and you will absolutely gain weight. Any other bullshit excuse is just you being autistic and retarded. Get as much protein as you can and as close to 2x a gram per pound of bodyweight. And yes, it's possible. And don't fucking walk off your damn food and come back complaining you fucked up because you've been standing all your calories our of your system.

Good luck, dummy. Start lifting heavier stuff.

/fit/izen 01/30/18 (Tue) 03:31:38 No.133225

File: f99e036c7a264eb⋯.jpg (111.81 KB, 620x559, 620:559, Jew.jpg)

>>133214

>lowfat anything

/fit/izen 01/30/18 (Tue) 04:13:25 No.133226

File: 7e4276259db5b83⋯.png (1.16 MB, 1920x1080, 16:9, umaruchanreturns.png)

>>133225

>fatty detected

/fit/izen 01/30/18 (Tue) 04:15:10 No.133229

>>133226

>if you eat fat you're going to become fat

>if you eat cucumbers you're going to become green

/fit/izen 01/30/18 (Tue) 04:15:45 No.133230

>>133229

no but if you eat too much tomatos you'll turn red

/fit/izen 02/04/18 (Sun) 02:28:52 No.133427

>>133214

>What the fuck are you doing.

Choosing a starting point, and with your advice I think I will move a little further toward my goal.

Do you have any knowledge about macro splits that you could share with me or any resources I learn about them? Increasing physical fitness is the thing I understand the least right now so any and all reliable information will go a long way.

/fit/izen 02/04/18 (Sun) 04:55:27 No.133432

>>133229

If you eat too many carrots and take a lot of B vitamin supplements you actually turn orange

Saw it happen to my dad when he was vegan a decade ago, apparently called carotenosis.

/fit/izen 02/04/18 (Sun) 05:06:52 No.133433

Drink Raw milk

Eat plenty of fats and cholesterol

Cut carbs aka sugar

/fit/izen 02/05/18 (Mon) 23:37:55 No.133516

>>133225

>>133229

>>lowfat anything

Normally im with you but lowfat quark (Magerquark) is ubiquitous in the german lifting scene, it has an amazing amino acid profile, is cheap as fuck, widely available, and very high protons. As far as i can tell its also not some sort of "diet version" of real quark where it has gone through a contrived chemical process. It's somehow naturally made.

>>133427

>macro splits

The most popular rule is 1g protein / lbs of bodyweight, then 20% of total calories fat, and the rest carbs.

In my opinion the most important thing is getting enough proteins, there's all sorts of memes going around about low-fat or low-carb. Whatever you do, don't cut out carbs completely, or your energy at the gym will drop severely. Eat carbs about 30 minutes before going to the gym.

/fit/izen 02/05/18 (Mon) 23:57:01 No.133519

Diet plans are always made for weak-willed faggots who can't follow through with a diet unless

1. every little detail is laid out for them and nothing is left to chance

2. everything is delicious

If you understand calorie counting and basic nutrition (carbs, proteins, and fats) then you can make your own the lazy way and just eat the same shit every day.