I actually have become more schizoid last few years, i am not very happy but don`t really want to die either, suicide is mostly an escapist fantasy but i would not want to go through it even though i constantly self isolate and fucking burn every bridge to a normal life and healthy relations with the world around me.
>>27712
Yep, is kind of amusing . i already come from a country that collapsed and experienced it all step by step, seeing first world nation do it is kinda entertaining in its own way, and dejavus are are amusing, although cynical and nihilistic on my part. but whatever, is not like caring makes a difference, all that there had to be said was said, all analysis and predictions were made, all the precedents were there as cautionary tales, is all for naught. Might as well get some dark humor out of it all. History is like that, positivist bullshit is wrong. progress is not a guarantee and civilizations have fallen many many times.
>>27680
>I've tried hanging (it took longer to pass out than it's supposed to, I only ever got fuzzy vision after multiple minutes of it) and overdosing on fentanyl (I half-assed it and passed out before I could finish the full dose).
Yeah, its almost like you never really wanted to die, people consciously or subconsciously sabotage their own attempts all the time. or who knows fren, maybe you actually died and quantum suicide is real, you`ll be jumping timelines for the third time now, maybe in the new one Raz from Chaz becomes the first Kang Emperor of Muttmerica and after expropiating Jeff bezos every citizen gets its own subsidized "i am with the revolution" keychain before everything collapses.