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/doomer/ - Doomers Club★

Most precious years of our lives are gone and now we clinch to alcoholism
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▶ No.20368 >>20379 >>20382 >>20432 >>21121 [Watch Thread][Show All Posts]

Then:

>went to parties

>got told I was fun to be around

>broad social web

>almost lost virginity

Now

>asocial recluse

>all remaining friends ignore me

>disgusted with everyone I meet, everything I see

I can't even be fucked to do drugs or drink alcohol, nothing appeals to me other than posting useless threads on 8ch. There's so much I want to say but when I do, I out myself as a fucking weirdo and when I keep it in, I come off as some skinny timid fucking loser. I want to scream but it's like that isn't real enough, I just end up kicking and punching the air in my room. I'm not even actively imagining a victim I'm just subconsciously fighting SOMETHING. God just let me get hit by a fucking bus

____________________________
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▶ No.20376>>20383

I only almost lost my virginity and even though I did have a lot of online friends they were unstable, not genuine friendships. I've always been the type of person to get bored of everyone, compromises such as the idea of having to talk to anyone every day, be it in person or online is so fucking tiring to me, and the solution of only talking certain days seems too forced for me to enjoy it. Ever since I was a kid I surprised people by how honest I was about wanting to simply end relationships, I simply told them (online, of course) that it's best that we stop talking, or simply deleted them, I once made friends with a guy from South America in an online chat, he was older than me at the time and a really great person, and one day I just blocked him and deleted him. I do this with every single person I've met, and ironically the only person I didn't do this to is the one that doesn't want anything to do with me.

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▶ No.20379>>20383

>>20368 (OP)

>nothing appeals to me other than posting useless threads on 8ch

Sounds like you need to get off 8ch, and I'm not saying this to be rude. You sound like you're young enough to have a shot at better things and this "appeal" that you talk about might just be an unhealthy cope.

>here's so much I want to say but when I do, I out myself as a fucking weirdo and when I keep it in, I come off as some skinny timid fucking loser.

Relatable. But maybe you are judging yourself harsher than others are judging you.

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▶ No.20382

File (hide): cd99a213dc4fff1⋯.jpg (46.87 KB,800x533,800:533,Richard-Stallman-13.jpg) (h) (u)

>>20368 (OP)

Pretty much iktf except I can still talk to people without being awkward weirdo. The problem is that I prefer not to. Good thing is that my only friend left is a girl which for some weird reason likes my weird ideas, it's just that I'm not even interested in sharing them anymore. Trying now to blend in, being the quiet one who replies with smile and gets the fuck out of places with humans in them. Only place where I can truly go "deeper" is now internet and my own head and I like it. The more I keep for myself irl, the better. It's not about people and their reactions, it's more about that my focus shifted on few important things for me and I don't really have anything to say about politics, current news, sports or whatever. I find it all pointless but I would talk with you about weather if you want.

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▶ No.20383>>20396

File (hide): 7cbf6faad6bbe43⋯.jpg (353.29 KB,1280x809,1280:809,42452346356.jpg) (h) (u)

>>20376

Holy fuck I don't want to be like "oh my gosh this is literally me" but this is literally me. I thought for a period I had sociopathy, but I've come off that idea by now. Perhaps being overcompensated with massive amounts of friends from childhood to now has left my sense of determining the value of friendships completely undeveloped. Same for you?

>>20379

I appreciate the advice, and I'm taking it to heart.

Regarding the other thing though, up until recently, I was under the impression people weren't judging me, but a series of events has left me shocked that all this time, what I thought was like, a quirky vibe is just straight up alienating weirdness and everyone else knew that, and talked about it behind my idiotic back. In short, people always judged me, it's just recently I've come to realize it, and now I've joined in.

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▶ No.20396

>>20383

>In short, people always judged me, it's just recently I've come to realize it, and now I've joined in.

Well yes. Everybody judges. And chances are that if you post here, you are more than a little weird. All I am saying is that this isn't the end of the world. I am not trying to lifecoach here, but the fact that you 'got told I was fun to be around' suggests that at least some people see your eccentricity as endearing.

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▶ No.20401

But why do you care about what people think about you?

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▶ No.20419>>21117

Then

>pretended to be one of my cousins peer group friends

>hang out with them every day after school

>never felt like I am one of them or that I belong to them

I also had my own clique of weirdos but we disbanded after 3 or 4 years

Now

>asocial recluse

>all remaining "friends" from that time probably don't even remember me anymore

>disgusted with entire world

Why do I even get up in the mornings anymore?

At least OP had an authentic social life.

You can say that there was a time in your life where you lived.

My life was one big lie from the beginning.

But it was fun to hang out with them nevertheless …

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▶ No.20432

File (hide): efb90a097b6791c⋯.jpg (20.42 KB,317x474,317:474,Holotropic_Therapy.jpg) (h) (u)

>>20368 (OP)

You could really try this on you. It's said to be powerful in similar cases.

http://www.holotropic.com/holotropic-breathwork/about-holotropic-breathwork/

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▶ No.21117

File (hide): 273cd3b00166c89⋯.jpg (58.83 KB,1920x1080,16:9,1509387828752.jpg) (h) (u)

>>20419

At least you had a group, i didn't even had one. My teen years were so awful that i don't even remember them. Sometimes i dream that i had fun in those year, and then i woke up with only remorse in my head.

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▶ No.21121>>21123

>>20368 (OP)

>I almost lost my virginity. I had it all. Now, I'm so bad ass I don't even do drugs or drink alcohol.

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▶ No.21123>>21124

>>21121

>I'm so bad ass I don't even do drugs or drink alcohol.

I don't get this. What's so bad ass about being a boring teetotaler?

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▶ No.21124

>>21123

You have to ask OP.

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