/doomer/ - Doomers Club★

Part 3: Revenge of the 'Tist

>met a cool guy about my age on a trip around 2 years later

>play games with him all the time

>he says his parents are going to a waterpark

>invites me to tag along

>bitchin

>they pick me up and I guess you can say things were going swimmingly

>chilling in the lazy river and he jumps in and wants to go on the slides

>hell yea

>as I'm walking up the slides I see a familiar face I had pushed to the back of my mind

>no, it can't be

>it was.

>it was her.

>tell my m8 I'll be right back

>start walking towards her, shes locked on

>she's with her little brother

>we lock eyes

>I walk closer

>she starts walking away

>ohnoyoudon't.jpg

>I walk faster, the power of autism in every step

>think there's a chance to rekindle at first, soon turns to one question

>why did she leave

>know now it was because of my autastic life story

>she's fast walking now

>break into a jog

>no escape

>she's abandoned the brother

>it's too late

>walk up to her

>thought she was annoyed, looking back at it, she was probably terrified

>we lock eyes, and my brain freezes

>uh, hi anon. What do you want?

>look at her in the eyes and smile

>spaghetti is primed to burst, I want to ask her why she never came back

>I fight off another freeze and look her dead in the eyes

>it's been a while! I just wanted to say hi!

<oh ok! Hi anon

>spaghetti can no longer hold itself. She's itching to leave

>my brain doesn't recognize it but my body does

>I unleash it all in one burst

>yea, good bye

>say this as I'm turning around and walk away

>m8 saw the whole thing

>tell him the story

>he laughs and says it's time for the slides

>follow him up, and we go down the slides

And that's my 3 part autistic voyage. Feel free to share yours

So I take it your a kissless Virgin then? You guys all have the same problem, you derive too much self worth from your ability to get laid, especially if you’re in your 20s. Men peak much later, you will not be “forever alone” because you didn’t marry the one random woman who walked up to you by chance. By the way, you’re lucky that even happened, you almost always have to approach first. But yeah, you clearly place too much pressure on yourself when talking to a girl and it obviously shows and is not attractive. You have to forget about all that shit and just treat talking to girls as practice for a bit right now, don’t worry about being rejected. Once you put yourself out there, women latch onto that because they are scared and want a man to make those confident moves. Good luck

>>15351

Hey there anon. I'm the guy that comes afterwards to tell you that you will, in all likelihood, die a kissless virgin. In fact, most men that have ever existed died kissless virgins. So, from a probabilistic perspective, you will probably never get laid, or kiss a gril. Also, most men peak young. If you haven't peaked yet, it does not follow that you will therefore peak in the future. Again, in all likelihood you peaked that one time that you threw a water bottle and it landed successfully. You might ask yourself, 'but I know of this one guy that says he peaked in his 30s.' And I will tell you that this is the exception that proves the rule. You are the rule. Accept it and don't kick yourself so much, because most men are likely in the very same situation as you.

>>15353

Or don't sit by the campfire, the choice is yours, don't be late

>>15356

I will have you know that I have no 'autistic stories' for you. I've been pretty anti-social my entire life. This does not mean I'm necessarily autistic. In fact, I am actually pretty popular with normies. I know how to engage with them the same way a master engages with his poodles. I am good at validating others, that's all. And that's really all you need.

>school time

>niggers go to see some castle but need to fill bus completely because cost of tickets or something

>teachers asked me if I wouldn't go because they have free places left and nobody else wanted to go

<ok whatever, better than spending whole day in school i guess

>sit in bus, everybody is from other classes, don't know any of those people

>spends bus ride watching outside of window, trying to look comfortable

>suddenly I notice girls from front seat looking at me

>i look on them, they start giggle

<ok this is fucked up

>one blonde, one brunette

>we got out of bus, go visit castle, they were always near me, try to talk to me, i'm trying to talk back

>that one blonde looks like she is into me or something but she looks too beautiful so i backed up

<I genuinely thought this is some kind of trick so she can laugh at me for falling for their bait

>we are going home, that blonde just keeps talking with me from front seat

>she says I'm cute and would definitely bf me even though she is 1 year older (that was sort of big deal in school, don't know why)

<still think it's bait

>i just smiled to be polite but didn't said anything

>got out of bus, disappeared

>spent rest of the day playing GTA Vice City

>>15345 (OP)

>be autistic

>be 21, obese, balding neet

>met grill at local gas station

>qt

>takes out phone because there's a message

>grill notices

>"what are you filming anon"

>"I'm not filming anything just sendi…."

>"it looks like you're filming me anon"

>due to my autistic nature I hold my phone high with both hands every time when i'm using it

>grill legit thinks I'm a freak

>didn't know what to do but to screech

>"I AM NOT FILMING YOU BITCH "

>proceeds to break phone by biting it

>keeps biting phone

>grill tells me to stop and says she doesn't care

>"I-M-M N-OT FFFIFUFUFUUU"

>screaming as I try to sink my teeth into my phone case

>grill walks away

>didn't know why I did that but I was really mad

>I guess being a social reject gets to you sometimes

>>15379

>proceeds to break phone by biting it

Now that's autistic

>>15379

That's pretty based

>be at a friend's place for the first time in sophomore year with 3 other friends

>playing injustice on normal difficulty against aquaman

>keep getting fucked

>one of them sits on the bed laughing at me, get pissed off but hold it in

>2 of them walk in and start dry humping his head and ass

>he's screaming for help

>get annoyed and punch one friend in the ass

>they all leave, but I still can't beat aquaman so I'm tilted

>2 humpers walk back into my room, guy whose house it was and a grade school dude

>grade school man shines laser in my eye

>I scream incoherently, grab a sword and swing at them

>they're scared shitless and hide in the dad's closet

>I kick the door

>guy whose house it is calms me down

>we fix the door

>not allowed back for a year

My life is a lolcow tier pool of autism and regret. I'd say that porn fucked me up more than anything else though, so I'll tell one of my many stories where I got caught.

>Be me

>15 year old at the time with already fucked up fetishes

>In room on laptop browsing pornhub

>Looking for a new high

>Costumes catches my eye

>Wank it to video of luchador fucking a lady or something

>Hear family coming downstairs towards my room (door doesn't have a lock)

>Immediately cease operations, hide laptop under covers without closing the browser and put my clothes on

>Go upstairs with some of them for a while

>Have a bad feeling about my laptop

>Go back to my room and look under the covers

>IT'S NOT FUCKING THERE

>Ask younger brother where my laptop went

>He says "Oh your friend and female cousin (both your age) took it to play with it anon"

>FUCK

>Find them just in time to see them open it up and see what I was watching

>Grab the laptop and take it from them in shame

>Later friend asks what the fuck that was, I say "MUST HAVE BEEN A VIRUS!"

>last days of class with chubby hot math teacher

>summer, we were basically doing nothing

>raging random boner bc me being 14yo

>teacher starts talking about his bunny pet and shows a photo of it, going to the desk of everyone of us

>she kneels in a way to show the photo to me but in the process her big boobs are displayed

>first time having breasts the size of my head that close to my face i cannot look away from them

>i fucking came in my pants

and then i went home to do a furious jack off thinking about what happened. i will never forget those shinning sweaty tits from summer

>>15401

Not autistic, just incredibly careless.

Since I moved with my mother at ages 13 to like, 17 I always masturbated in my room with the door open to semi open, no lights, for hours. Not because I didn't know better, but because I was so depressive I was beyond caring at that point of my life, so I gave it little importance.

She must have walked from the corridor that goes to the bathroom and see me every afternoon after school jacking off making the chair make those loud sounds as it creacked.

I would mostly dine at my desk the first half of those years but I would come fresh from masturbating 6 to 10 hours straight to dinner sweating and smelling with the cheeks flushed as if nothing had happened.

>>15878

She probably did it on purpose.

>>15888

ojala chori, ojala

>>15878

I don't think that's autistic even if you came in your pants just like that. I also had few thick teachers like this one with huge tits, so of course when I came back home it was usually beat the meat time.

>be me

>13 years old getting my haircut

>mom drives me to walmart for the discount superclips because dad spent all out money on bike parts or some shit

>just got braces tightened and can barely talk

>barber sits me in chair

>she is fresh out of beauty school 20 year old with nice tits and ass

>instaboner

>keeps telling that im cute and shit

>precum dripping constantly filling up my shorts

>barber keeps talking me up

>keeps telling me im cute

>i pull together all my spaghetti and tel her she is pretty cute too, even give a little wink

<sorry buddy, I dont do guys whose moms take them to get their haircut

She could have let me down lightly

>>15887

Yeah, careless sounds about right. I've gone nofap since, but the memories still suck. Do normalfags deal with this level of embarrassment?

>>15345 (OP)

I have some sort of complex-thing where I get extremely embarrassed if I don't know how to answer a question. In Finland there are 3 languages that are mandatory in school: Finnish, English and Swedish.

In every Swedish class I would lose my spaghetti every time the teacher asked me to answer or told me to read aloud. I usually tried to read the text/answer the question but usually I couldn't come up with an answer, and then I would freeze up and stay quiet until the teacher just gave up, and sometimes I would start also laughing nervously and making weird nervous noises. The way I passed the Swedish classes was that I just crammed everything before the tests and forgot everything right after the exams.