No.387809 [View All]
Now many of you on here like to spill the beans on body dysphoria.
But what about those with social/mental disorders?
Schizoaffective disorder, autism/Aspergers, psychopathy, anxiety attacks, split personality, demonic possession, etc.
____________________________
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No.389413
>>389411
Anything that doesn't stop you from being a mental nutcase that thinks he will ever be a girl is making the mental illness worse.
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No.389510
>>389413
yeah uh, if there was some magic medicine that just stopped people from being dysphoric. people would actually be taking it
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No.389512
>>389413
besides, i never claimed i turned into a girl from taking estradiol. i am saying that it made my dysphoria less bad and that i don't have to worry about going bald and looking like an old decrepit man.
what's wrong with looking like a girl anyway?
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No.389525
its all in your mindpussy
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No.389736
OP here. I have autism and schizoaffective disorder. Life is just a huge blur of gray that I am anguishingly waiting to pass and end. I am clumsy, anxious and unsure of everything. There's nothing magical or great about (human) life. There's a few peaceful moments here and there, but other than that, it's meh.
That's why science documentaries, music, graphic novels, doujins, and porn exist.
I have no interest in looking for love. Why waste your time looking for a poor soul to pity you when you can't even find a reason to get out of bed? I know I'm a piece of work. I know that it'll take me a lifetime to fully mature/grow some balls/get my shit together. And I'm not the only one. Maturity, contrary to popular belief, is not age-based, and it's not intellectually based either.
Anyway, the point is, the vast majority of the love-hungry folks on this board haven't realized that falling in love will not make the pain go away. Depression, autism, anxiety and other mental disorders are not ailments that can be trained away. They're not even "disorders". They're just permanent scarring of the personal psyche. The mind is a fragile, defective faculty of humankind.
If there is such thing as reincarnation, I DO NOT want to come back as a human. NEVER AGAIN. Human experience is the ultimate hell on the earthly realm.
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No.389745
/fringe/ here. I'm in regular contact with an entity existing on the level of symbolic meaning; it is a sort of hyper-archetype or hypermemetic virus. Language and meaning is the fruit to the plant of humanity, it seeded that fruit and eats it. It is the means by which we are in constant awareness of it, that awareness being its primary food. Many people have written very extensively about this thing; it may be related to or in fact is a hyperentity of the type met during tryptamine experiences. Of course I'm compressing this down severely and cannot here explain it fully without going on for many pages; we're talking about an entity which is outside of the bounds of biology to describe, a fact I'm well aware of as a biochemist.
I'm also well aware this is essentially schizotypal, but the thing is, I simply don't care. It confers certain benefits upon me to act as if this story is true, and it does me no harm to believe as much so long as I can keep it in my pants about my imaginary friend who lives in language and communicates primarily through cognitive slippage. Certainly it is far less bonkers and far more interesting to me than most of the shit people believe. Hey, in for a penny, in for a pound. If you're going to get involved in psychonautics you should be ready to incur the cost.
>>389736
If you hate samsara so much, there's the door, don't let it hit you on the ass on your way out.
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No.389747
Although I should really count myself lucky that the worst I have is some ADHD and maybe a touch of obsessional-delusional (but thankfully pronoia-inducing) schizotypal stuff rather than autism. From what I understand, it's like being a basement dweller but all the time instead of only when you're jobless and sad. Is that about right?
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No.389764
>>389736
We are a lot alike, and I agree with almost all of what you said. The ironic part is that I already know neither of us will derive even the tiniest modicum of comfort from this quasi-camaraderie. What, are we going to meet up, discuss our problems, and then fuck? Ha! What a joke, right? We want to believe it would work, some reptilian part of our mind longing for the fugue of physical comfort, but know it won't. We're too insightful into reality for our own good. We pay too much attention to the man behind the curtain. It's all meaningless.
So, really, it's a coin-flip between whether I just close the tab and let this post vanish into the aether, or hit "new reply". Maybe I've done this before; maybe this time will be different. Either way, it's little more than a curiosity.
Have a good day. Or don't. I don't care. I can't care.
Shit.
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No.389766
>>389764
>We're too insightful into reality for our own good. We pay too much attention to the man behind the curtain. It's all meaningless.
Christ alive I fucking hate sophomores.
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No.389767
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No.389808
>>389747
What is the picture?
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No.389811
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No.389829
>>389808
The evolution of Louis Wain's art. It was widely held for a while that his art was evidence of his schizophrenia, though that's now largely disputed.
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No.389977
no friends
hikki
clinical depression
no social skills
poor
want a cute bf but I know it will never happen
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No.390157
>>389766
I'm old enough to be your father, child. Pipe down and play nice, or I'll spank you and not give a reach-around.
>>389829
Very disputed. There is no verified data on the order in which any of these were painted, and the entire latter half of this were meant to be his renditions of textile patterns. If you see a cat in there, that's on you not him. There's also the entire part where absolutely nothing about schizophrenia relates to seeing or creating things in an abstract manner, and very rarely does it "progress".
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No.390173
1. Depression
2. Emotional problems
3. bouts of loneliness
4. hyperactivity
5. too clingy with people and friends
sometimes I just want to chat to people and for them to really like me and have a really close connection with someone just as friends. Sometimes I want to fall into the arms of an understanding caring boyfriend that I can tell all my troubles to and he'll remind me how loved i am and that he understands me while he snuggles me tight
But I am single and it kind of makes me hate myself a little more than usual
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No.390224
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No.390241
>>387809
Based off most of the replies here it sounds like the main mental illness is stays indoors all day doing meaningless shit waiting for a magical boyfriend to pop out of their own ass and heal all their problems-itis.
No one wants to date someone who is a gentle breeze away from having a mental break down all the time. People want to date other people who are fun, have hobbies and are at least somewhat fulfilled by the way they live their lives. No one wants to be around miserable self loathing types who are actively doing nothing about it. Honestly most of this board is just negative miserable cunts who enjoy being that way like /r9k/. You're probably not going to be more happy by listening to the people who come here.
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No.390242
>>390241
>posts this in the literal mental illness thread
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No.390248
>>390241
>People want to date other people who are fun, have hobbies and are at least somewhat fulfilled by the way they live their lives.
I would want to debate you on this point, at least specifically.
In my opinion, you can be someone who has hobbies, has some genuine interests and is a fun person to be around. Being all of these things doesn't stop someone from suffering from depression or similar issues like that. Indeed, lonliness and isolation can take someone who could be very stable, and bring them to a state of total depression, maybe even suicidal.
Personally, I think if you're going to date someone, you're going to date someone who has emotions, thoughts and concerns, and you're going to need the person you're dating to actually listen to you and actually give you emotional support. Of course, this shouldn't be a constant thing, but if the person you're dating has no time to listen to and talk to you about the things that's making you feel miserable, then you're dating the wrong kind of person entirely.
I don't know what to say about people who keep to themselves all the time, never seek help from friends (or family) and seemingly do nothing about being in a perpetually miserable state.
But what I can say, is that if you're open about your mental state with someone you trust completely, and you both talk things out and support each other, it's entirely possible to be very mentally stable. No one is immune to mental health issues, but you can do something about it. I always feel better after talking to someone about what I am experiencing, and after they assure me, or even comfort me, I ususally feel a lot more confident about life in general. It's not about being close to a mental breakdown, it's about making sure you are can keep stable, and know you can talk about something.
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No.390370
Do you think it's easier to date someone else that's mentally ill? I've got a few issues and it feels like I've had to try to hide them from my past bfs that were relatively normal
I'm with someone that also has a few issues now and it feels like we can be totally open with each other without being a burden, it's kinda nice tbh
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No.390392
>>390241
You're right.
But you're still a complete fucking asshole, and nobody is going to want to date you, either.
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No.390459
>>390370
I have to hide everything from everyone =D
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No.390630
>>387809
I'm a boi with Aspergers, high on the spectrum so it's a unique challenge to keep myself appearing normal while struggling with social situations all the time.
I like the idea of talking about this topic but I'm not sure where a good part to start is, I do a pretty good job of using my complete lack of social senses to keep times in bed sexy and moving forward.
I'm an Aspergers guy who actually focused real hard to become social and I've made a lot of progress, I'd love to talk to another person with Aspergers to see how we connect.
anyone interested can hit me up on kik: Namsuomynona
>>388941
I like tall guys, they are so nice to cuddle
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No.390632
>>390630
As far as I know aspergers hasn't been a diagnostic for some years now. It was too loose, now there's just autism spectrum.
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No.390634
>>390632
does that mean I have to go get tested or something to find out exactly where I am?
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No.390635
>>390634
"previously considered a stand-alone diagnosis (…) Asperger's Syndrome now falls under the umbrella term Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)"
It would make sense to talk about this with the doctor that diagnosed you with Aspergers originally I think - if at all possible.
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No.390637
>>390635
I don't think I can, good to know that they made changes to classifications though
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No.391206
>>387809
I'm a boymoding tranny in the southern US with severe anxiety(both social and general). I can't leave the house without getting nervous. I struggle to hold down jobs and get lost in fits of anxiety when I stay indoors.How do I learn to stop caring what others think of me, because I know I look like a freak?
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No.391208
>>391206
get out even more than you currently do. talk to people. get used to it.
do you have a psychologist?
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No.391209
>>391208
Recently booked an appointment for a psychiatrist to see if they can help any
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No.391210
>>391209
It helped for me. Make sure you feel comfortable with them, go to at least 3 appointments before you make a decision about it. If you feel like they aren't good at their job, pick another one.
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No.391258
>>389158
what would you like to know more about anon?
i would be happy to talk on discord if you'd like.
Cooro#3223
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No.391481
I have Obsessive Compulsive ADD. I usually function fairly well which is how I went 98% of my life diagnosed and unsuspecting but my head just never shuts the fuck up. I'm a total control freak with no direction, and I just want some peace and quiet. I'm disturbingly paranoid, but I'm usually super tolorant and friendly towards anybody, even to my detriment. The next person who tells me to just try eating healthier and taking walks every day to stop having anxiety attacks is going to make me finally fucking lose it.
I just want some quiet organization, but that seems like too much to ask. I'm never in control of my thoughts, the other way around. Recently stared meditating but it's super mixed results so far. I'm praying on it.
>Does being gay work into it?
A little. I'm way too paranoid and controlling of what other people think to let my true faggot out, but most people know I'm Bi and annoy me about it as much as anybody else I guess. I just tolerate it, like most social problems. If I could let go of my need to control/manipulate what other people think of me, I'd be wearing skirts or androgynous dresses every day.
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No.391586
>>387840
>Nothing that suicide can't cure though
FTFY friend
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No.391592
>>387840
HRT will actually make you want to kill yourself statistically.
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No.391698
Aaah mental things. 80 - 100% can be riddened if there is someone that understands these things. And it is done. So who goes first?
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No.391712
>>391698
Found the guy without a psychology degree.
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No.391808
>>391712
Apparently I have. But I don't think it is suitable to make money off. Even on the contrary.
So anyway. You must see/feel somehow what I am talking about. Let's give it a go.
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No.391964
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No.391965
So let's see it. And not anymore relatively easy.
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No.391968
If not the bormer something else: feedback on this proposal.
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No.410107
What I dont get is this:
Why is 4chan and 8chan so hung up on zoomers? You all obsessively blame them for anything and everything yet you all are degenerate, sad, paranoid manchildren a lot of whom are NEETS on prescriptions.
Yet you think that your birth year is your virtue over the current generation of teens.
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No.410110
I'm glad this thread got revived instead of meetup/normie thread #508.
Depressed and suicidal, have panic attacks about once a week, may or may not be schizoid (but making friends is way less desirable to me than it should be), may or may not be drug addicted. I don't hate myself or other people, but everything feels so wrong. When i'm having an episode or when a panic attack triggers me to stay inside all day, i feel like everything is going wrong. The world is ending, my life is ruined, my career doesn't exist (it doesn't, but i'm more upset that it never will), my family are disappointed in me, etc.. The worst part is i have no self-esteem issues. I have no doubts that i'm a good person, a good friend, handsome, and that i stick to doing what i think is the right thing to do. My brain don't share this sentiment. Despite having no issues with self-esteem, i have suffered quite a bit physically and socially. I hyperventilate, i have psychomotor retardation, i've become mute (as in, i have to try very hard yo force words out of my mouth), and i get angry all the time. I starve myself not because i hate myself, but because i just choose not to eat. I don't care about myself. I don't know how. I could have lots of friends, but i guess i don't care enough to. I want them, but i don't care about getting them. It doesn't make sense. Even online, i'm shy and have a hard time opening up unless i get angry. It really seems like the only time i actually feel alive is when i get angry, to be honest.
I've been hospitalized for suicide even though i wasn't actually gonna do it. I chose to go because i thought that being locked up away from electronics and my own home surrounded by people in the same boat would help. It did, but the only long term benefit was that i got a prescription for antidepressants and i'm qualified for autismbux now. I don't like antidepressants and i'll never take them again, though, because the citalopram gave me heart problems and hypertension. I've just been looking for somebody to hook me up with psychedelics and weed, although medicinal marijuana and ketamine are legal now, and i could ask for benzos. I haven't seen my therapist in a while, so i can't ask for a prescription until i go back, but i don't have the motivation to even call. The only reason i agreed to therapy is to get a drug fix, but these antidepressants aren't doing it. They refuse to prescribe benzos so they won't give me anything for panic attacks, and i'm sure they wouldn't give me marijuana or legal ket either.
To be honest, i don't feel any shame in being a druggie even if i haven't been able to get my hands on any because of having no friends or contacts, (and now that i think about it, it would be wonderful to have a bf who would help me with this). I like to distinguish between hard and soft drugs. Anything medicinal with few ill effects and no easy addiction is something i consider a soft drug, meanwhile something you'd give an arm or a leg for (like crack or crank) is something i'd stay far away from. Even big pharma has no problem with opioids, though i'd stay away from that too if i had access to it, but it should still raise questions about what's right and wrong.
I honestly don't know what to do. I obviously need to go outside and try making friends, but even that is a tough one. I don't enjoy electronic stuff at all (even drugs would be better than an internet addiction), and i'd rather just sit down with a nice guy and talk to them about stuff and enjoy each-other's company.
Anyways, the only people i talk to are my family and they don't enjoy my company. They don't understand my problems, and i'm so good at masking my pain they don't even realize there is something wrong with me. That's my fault, though, for being good at socializing. Most people ignore the dark bags under my eyes and the fact they can see my ribs because i'm so nice and chatty.
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No.410112
>>389158
Haha this is my post from almost a year ago I'm 24 now I'm no longer a virgin (don't think I was anyway) and I'm in a recovery program that is helping with my sobriety and next week I will start on Sertraline/Zoloft well I might anyway because I'm not doing well with the sobriety thing tbh I'm still drinking, smoking weed and using cocaine.
Had a few close calls with suicide accidentally and on purpose and I've been generally reckless as fuck spent all my cash on drugs and travel and have made an ass out of myself many times in the past year.
I feel hopeful though.
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No.410113
>>410110
Sounds rough I can relate with the panic attacks sometimes I don't leave my bed for days because I'm so scared or whatever of doing anything and I get triggered by past intrusive thoughts that half the time are exaggerated or total bullshit.
Do antidepressants suck? I'm really on the fence about them especially if they get in the way of my drink and drugs.
Also hang in there man it will get better you just got a keep making little improvements nothing changes overnight.
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No.410114
>>410113
I don't know about all antidepressants but citalopram caused heart palpitations after only a week of taking them so i'd suggest never using citalopram. I have a prescription for wellbutrin, but i haven't taken it either because i'm scared antidepressants will turn me into a pillzombie. I'd rather have benzos and weed. I suggest that you don't take antidepressants at all and find an alternative somehow (but use them in mental institutions just so people think you're taking your pills).
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No.410116
>>410114
I'm going to avoid them apparently zoloft can cause heart issues as well which on top of the cocaine is basically suicide.
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No.410125
I don't think it's an illness but I know I'm not very well adjusted.
To not make it a sob story or anything my family was pretty detached from me as a kid, dad never left his room at home and eventually moved out due to a divorce, mom was always working or watching TV, and thus got games and a computer pretty early on. Also had a cousin who molested me along with a few of his friends, imagine that might've contributed too. But mostly the computer and games, I was raised almost entirely by the internet since I got next to no actual parenting.
Most my mom ever gave me was yelling and beating when I discovered porn, step dad didn't interact at all really, dad was distant. I didn't even have chores or anything, just long as I had good grades I was left alone until someone had a reason to be mad at me. Never had friends really, one in elementary I never got to talk to since my mom never let me out of the house outside of school and shopping with her, one in middle school who I think just put up with me since after we didn't share a period we never talked. And then two in high school, one called me and the other gay and after that I fell out the group.
So the bulk of my social experience is online, I have no clue what friends do when not forced to be together for school or work, and a shitty work ethic since well, no chores or anything to build it. I'm getting better since I had a breakdown a couple years ago, finally decided to continue studying in college for myself instead of 'Family wants me to graduate'.
Still no work experience and pussied out of a walmart job but I am getting better with social stuff. Still can't do it in person, I feel awkward and don't know how to initiate, continue, or anything with body language (I can't even do VRchat). But I've made some ok social bonds online through tabletops and groups with degenerate tastes, so hopefully one day I'll be able to make a real life friend. Or maybe a boy friend but considering I still look like shit and will for a while longer that's not likely.
Still though I'm making progress. I'm way better than I was as a kid or teenager, I'm thinking for myself and doing things because I want to do something. Just kinda feels like picking up a used game and trying to figure out where the old save was, no leads, lost, and kinda confused. If anyone's got general life advice (Fucked if anyone ever taught me anything, especially with finance) I'd appreciate it. Ditto for social advice, I'd like to be able to talk normally with people at college without coming off as a creep or being forced into a dorm situation. Even small stuff helps.
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No.410127
>>410125
I'm not really the best for life advice but I got a few tips I guess.
Don't use credit cards for things you couldn't straight up buy. When you talk to people look at their eyes not mouth but not for too long. When you feel awkward speaking to people don't act on it understand that it is just a feeling and continue to talk about whatever and don't kick yourself if you fuck up chatting shit isn't the end of the world. Most people when meeting a new person feel awkward too, everyone has problems some more than others but don't go around in pity for yourself expecting someone to give a fuck because they won't. Don't trust people always look for motives in their actions and speech but on the flipside don't be overly paranoid. Never pay for drugs in advance and don't borrow money from anyone ever unless you absolutely have to.
Oh also avoid gambling its addictive as all fuck and it will destroy you but if you do gamble stick with table games at casinos none of that electronic shit especially on mobiles.
As for sex advice I don't have any I either pay for it or end up black out drunk fucking and I never remember the details.
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