>Be an atheist near the 25th of December>Hear someone say "merry Christmas" 666 km away>Become enrage that anyone would disagree with secular totalitarianism>rush byhind them by sonic the edgehog speed>reeeee with the sound of a thousand pepes (pbu

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File: 6b521688d631c7c⋯.jpg (70.71 KB, 812x960, 203:240, Average bern voter punchab….jpg)

Christanon 12/25/17 (Mon) 06:58:33 441909 No.578308

>Be an atheist near the 25th of December

>Hear someone say "merry Christmas" 666 km away

>Become enrage that anyone would disagree with secular totalitarianism

>rush byhind them by sonic the edgehog speed

>reeeee with the sound of a thousand pepes (pbuh)

"It's 'happy holidays'"!

>Smuganimugril.exe

>Feel intellectually superior beyond these primitive non-nihilists can comprehend

>doesn't realize that "holidays" is a combination of 'holy' and 'days'

>Whole of society applauds in ignorance anyways

Christanon 12/25/17 (Mon) 07:01:59 3fc31b No.578311

File: 684ace36cfd4f3b⋯.jpg (72.42 KB, 720x462, 120:77, c888f53a122021eb45e467a3f4….jpg)

>>578308

You faggot, you need to get down on your knees and worship the trees

Christanon 12/25/17 (Mon) 07:15:52 67a03e No.578319

>>578311

Have a great day, tree friend!

Christanon 12/25/17 (Mon) 07:19:40 441909 No.578320

>>578311

Yeah, yeah, like Oden and bablyonian polytheism has totally been praise throughout the last centuries.

Christanon 12/25/17 (Mon) 08:43:45 93358e No.578345

>>578311

>Go back in time to Ancient Sumeria

>Cut down one of the Cedars of Lebanon in time for the winter solstice

>Decorate the tree with all sorts of ornaments made of gold and silver

>Get Enmerkar and Dumuzi to start a ceremony of worshipping the tree as an incarnation of Enki like how Aaron made a Golden Calf.

>Oh, Enki, oh Enki; how lovely is your wisdom.

>Deliver presents on Christmas

>Convert the Sumerians to Christ before Abraham is born by using Paul's sermon on the Areopagus to proclaim their foolishness before YHWH, how all their gods are actually demons, and that the tree is representative of the cross and the resurrection which is to come.

>Go forward in time and shitpost on /christian/.

The Christmas tree represents the cross and the gifts that Christ gave us when he was crucified. The ornaments represent us bearing fruit as we remain in him.

Christanon 12/25/17 (Mon) 08:50:40 3b930d No.578350

>>578311

isnt the christmas tree a lutheran invention?

Christanon 12/25/17 (Mon) 10:08:17 18acb1 No.578375

>>578308

>sonic the edgehog

Don't know if you misspelled it on purpose or just made a mistake but this was brilliant.