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<BOARD RULES>
[ /agdg/ | Vidya Porn | Hentai Games | Retro Vidya | Contact ]

File: a41b47cce5bf90c⋯.png (363.59 KB, 553x729, 553:729, hmm.png)

157252  No.15815434

I don't mean something like a AAA shitfest, I mean really bad games. Like those weird Chinese plug 'n play games.

For me it was one of those Game & Watch-style of games I got at McDonalds when I was a kid. I don't remember what the theme was, but I remember all you did was move a net up and down to collect butterflies and dodge something.

After about a minute of this it would go onto the next level, from what I could tell each level was the exact same (even where the butterflies and obstacles spawned from) there was no real level cap. I couldn't have been older than 7, but even then I knew it was a piece of shit.

55be11  No.15815449

File: fc1b6330adcc443⋯.png (702.72 KB, 690x654, 115:109, LQ smug.png)

>[insert /v/'s favorite video game here]


44da67  No.15815451

>>15815434

I don't remember the name, but I played a godawful Whac-A-Mole arcade game in Germany as a teenager. It was the most unresponsive and slow pile of garbage I've played. You had a flimsy plastic hammer and faux-DDR pad hooked to a screen with a grid. When a mole popped up in one of the squares you were meant to hit the corresponding square on the pad, but it would only work 25% of the time.


694647  No.15815576

File: df27c53a6855a13⋯.png (1.1 MB, 1278x718, 639:359, buuuuuuulshit.png)

It would have to be either one of the games in 300in1 ARCADE GAMES FOR PC compilations I had as a kid or Soldner on PS2, which I cannot find anywhere. It was a WWII fps and the first level took place in a snow filled forest. It was a stealth section and I could not for the life of me get past that first level nor could my teacher, who was the one that gave me that game to try out. I am absolutely god awful at stealth games, but I could at least finish Blood Money without cheats on my own, this was a bullshit game with unforgiving hitboxes and draw distance the length of my frostbitten dick.


12e837  No.15815685

File: 802b8932715f3bf⋯.jpg (179.58 KB, 1200x635, 240:127, bideo james.jpg)

>>15815434

Remember these? I had the shadow one

and had no idea who that was cuz sonic advance didn't feature him


03e33a  No.15815971

File: 4c6d933a3693200⋯.jpg (47.71 KB, 300x434, 150:217, [muffled screams of agony].jpg)

This one.


d04c57  No.15815998

There's a lot of flash games and super low end homebrew games out there that are literally broken or unfinished.

Limiting it to actual retail products, maybe Small Soldiers on the gameboy. I hated that game. Taught me the valuable lesson that a game wont be good just because the movie was.


1f4a0a  No.15816104

File: 817cab7effe6368⋯.jpg (13.68 KB, 250x250, 1:1, flight.jpg)

I just remember that not even my middle school-aged Star Wars fanboy self could say the game was at least okay. It was awful beyond words.


1e0840  No.15816142

X-Men: Wolverine's Rage for GBC. What a pile of shit.


3ceb26  No.15816154

File: a4ee930f45a6fc5⋯.png (1.03 MB, 640x911, 640:911, ClipboardImage.png)


694647  No.15816169

File: eacc89ed2ca0231⋯.jpg (30.86 KB, 350x350, 1:1, Roswell-Conspiracies-Alien….jpg)

>>15815998

>>15816104

oh fuck, you two reminded me of spending $50 on this piece of garbage. I didn't even know about the show, I thought that cover looked cool.


4e7657  No.15816174

File: 088e35c578279a1⋯.jpg (503.95 KB, 2508x1672, 3:2, 48270891_l[1].jpg)

The claw machine at the local diner. It costs $1 for a single play and the claw doesn't apply any pressure at all. Even if it did, the prizes are shit and probably cost less than a penny.


2f7a0c  No.15816186

File: 4ddcfae9586d546⋯.jpg (52.64 KB, 458x458, 1:1, shrek-fairy-tale-freakdown….jpg)

I like how some retards complain about Steam saturation when the Gameboy, the NES, the DS, 90s PC and the Playstation 2 were literally in the same predicament.


06ea4b  No.15816196

File: c500c50fc8e21b6⋯.jpeg (456.33 KB, 3200x1680, 40:21, D38A89E0-8A47-410D-8A6A-1….jpeg)

I’m not even kidding or trying to be dramatic

>hey guys, let’s shoot for 30 FPS, if we don’t hit it that’s fine

>sure there’ll be a delay to the controller input, but let’s make Joel over animated on top of that delay and we’ll just call it “realism”

>also, that delay we’ll make shooting nearly impossible but it’s for the sake of tension

It’s amazing this game got the praise it did. I couldn’t play it longer than an hour before realizing just how unplayable the thing was.


2f7a0c  No.15816199

File: 3a90f569059f1ae⋯.webm (10.95 MB, 640x360, 16:9, Modern console games inpu….webm)

>>15816196

It's the same thing with Red Dead Redemption 2


dd4634  No.15816205

File: e8f7d6d1e7b5682⋯.jpg (31.31 KB, 474x660, 79:110, ff.jpg)

>>15815685

Damn man, I was just coming to post this.


4ad02f  No.15816206

>>15816199

christ alfuckingmighty


ec1859  No.15816217

File: 68d58cfadfa04b3⋯.webm (9.32 MB, 352x264, 4:3, sonic happy meal.webm)


0da0df  No.15816221

>>15815685

Tennis one was the best, but arguably the Crash/Spyro McD games were way better, because at least one of them had two sets of buttons for versus play.

I still have some lying around, but the batteries are long dead.


d2752e  No.15816246

>>15816174

All claw machines are rigged. The owner can set a win percentage rate. Even if you grab something, if the RNG says you aren't a winner then the claw will basically let go before you get to the prize deposit slot.s


2f7a0c  No.15816251

>>15816209

>>>/tv/


583663  No.15816332

File: 6dc895d06c3fb7f⋯.jpg (508.25 KB, 1507x2166, 1507:2166, c32fb88f7c3cbbb8b88d7bd3a1….jpg)

I go out of my way to play a lot of shitty games, but I think the absolute worst I've ever played was Postal 3. It's barely functional. I'm not even sure if this is true, but I've heard you're literally unable to get the pacifist ending because certain parts of the game will crash if you don't kill anyone.


2f7a0c  No.15816342

Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>15816332

Here's a decent in depth 41 minute review by some fag on Jewtube


87cb99  No.15816346

>>15815685

I still have the Shadow one


502d3d  No.15816351

independence day for playstation.

i rented it when i was a kid. couldnt beat the first stage. it's timed "destroy the X before the time limit ends" yet the pop-in was so bad, by the time they popped in, you would either crash into it, or not be able to shoot long enough to do the damage required to destroy it.

never saw beyond that.


694647  No.15816353

>>15816351

AVGN did an episode on it if you're interested.


9916be  No.15816382

File: 31fb3c260129fc0⋯.jpg (63.59 KB, 580x667, 20:23, metal_gear_solid_4_guns_of….jpg)

To this day, every time I think about this pile of vomit, I feel this nostalgic rage inside me. This has to be the worst game ever made.


9669be  No.15816388

>>15816382

And it's still better than 5


29d4b2  No.15816389

File: 9406e83420b7fef⋯.mp4 (1.8 MB, 450x360, 5:4, Urdu McDonalds Crash Bandi….mp4)

>>15816217

Was reminded of this thing.


9916be  No.15816398

>>15816388

It really isn't.


815026  No.15816399

>>15816389

That crash model is amazing


29d4b2  No.15816405

File: 7cac16341545282⋯.jpg (7.59 KB, 118x171, 118:171, 1351017713904.jpg)

>>15816399

The Cortex one's great too.


2cccbd  No.15816426

>>15816199

How are they measuring stick detection in this video? It clearly isn't "when the thing starts moving" because that's the animation response. You shouldn't be able to see the difference between stick detection and animation response because there's nothing to measure it by.

Unless they are actually intercepting the inputs to see when the system recognizes them? But you shouldn't be able to do that on a console.


9669be  No.15816431

>>15816398

In every way it is.


8ef24e  No.15816433

>>15815971

that box art is actually pretty stylish


b9361c  No.15816476

>>15816154

I unironically loved DMC2


dd66fe  No.15816493

Life.


09c3f4  No.15816537

File: b74d6da31150206⋯.jpg (399.4 KB, 1157x763, 1157:763, stormlordAd.jpg)

Shall I give this piece of shit another chance, to see if I can deal with its abstruse puzzles any better than when I was ten?


1b88da  No.15816600

>>15815685

I had the Tennis and Flower one. Also had one where you raced against F1 cars as sonic in a car, but I think it's from a different set.


2b4f0f  No.15816612

>>15816186

theres still just rows of garbage for the pc at pretty much any store that sells electronics. it wouldnt surprise me if its been sitting there since early 2000s


cf2244  No.15816636

>>15816537

It was made by a studio that had employees working in British gaming rags to give their mediocre crap inflated review scores, no joke.


583663  No.15816651

File: 39c501fec7a9c71⋯.jpg (17.76 KB, 315x319, 315:319, Dante_embarassing.jpg)


d15979  No.15816660

Shellshock 2 Blood Trails. Rented it from a family video when me and a buddy would rent 1 game a week and pull an all nighter beating it and it seriously was the biggest piece of garbage ever.


4e7657  No.15816671

>>15816246

That's absolutely infuriating and should be against the law. It's outright fraud/theft. If anything they should just stuff the machines so tight that the claw can't get through.


844460  No.15816673

File: 741ed3766051b0a⋯.jpg (46.36 KB, 283x400, 283:400, 30566.jpg)

Recently that I can remember? The GC Bobobo game. Holy shit if it doesn't suck ass. I have to wonder how small the budget, the dev team and the time they took to release it was. The gameplay is extremely basic without any depth, pretty much move and run to push the other players. That's it. The movement is extremely barebones. And the "dungeons" suck balls too.

Maybe it's not that bad, but holy fuck I couldn't keep playing it any longer.


694647  No.15816681

File: 3696fa2c709b231⋯.mp4 (7.29 MB, 480x360, 4:3, Fat Mann Re-Uploadeth - Ha….mp4)

>>15816342

This guy isn't too bad. Reminds me of Urinating Tree's later work.


dd4860  No.15816691

File: af48437b67a17f5⋯.jpg (30.82 KB, 256x317, 256:317, Fableiii.jpg)

File: 0642702f833e636⋯.jpg (307.43 KB, 1920x1200, 8:5, Dragon-Age-2-Cover.jpg)

>>15815434

Either Fable 3 or Dragon age 2

Even romhacks or indie shit aren't THAT bad as those

I know there are worse games but i try to avoid those


09c3f4  No.15816719

>>15816681

That game was okay back then. Anything 3D on the Genesis was impressive, even if it was so crude in hindsight.


8fdcef  No.15816738

Sonic spin ball when I was a kid. That game is still awful.

Besides that, The Simpsons Road Rage. Shit game that they sold around the same time as hit and run.


340d91  No.15818864

>>15816405

I love Death Grips


0766b0  No.15819695

File: 3862e82f813e1ea⋯.png (1.19 MB, 1024x680, 128:85, RDWEG9.png)

>>15815434

I remember renting this from Blockbuster before Wii Motion Plus was a thing. Motion controls were terrible. It is the most disappointing game I ever rented at Blockbuster. I don't even remember a non-motion option, but if it does I'd want to revisit it to see if it is actually serviceable without motion controls.


871eb9  No.15819715

>>15816199

The only one that is any servicable is Destiny holy shit. When the fuck will we come back to the snappy Platformer control scheme where your character moved with the analog?


7b1cb8  No.15819748

File: b6a5caa84e1ec5f⋯.jpg (258.85 KB, 1920x1080, 16:9, Star_Citizen_2018-11-26_20….jpg)

Star Citizen, if you can count it as a game.

Played it all last week because it was free.

Half hour loading screens, no gameplay, lots of in-game waiting, and the community aspect is all cultists who are extremely hostile.


871eb9  No.15819776

File: bfeda51f1c64307⋯.jpg (1.22 MB, 1920x1080, 16:9, ss_fb5fdd6e8a98962b49921da….jpg)

File: 72d43d6a4c0413e⋯.png (66.48 KB, 333x326, 333:326, Offensive Jewish stereotyp….png)

It's hilariously bad, let me give you a quick rundown.

>A King's Bounty clone with 3 units per faction. There are only three factions, while playing as a faction you cannot use units of any other factions.

>The game is an android port that tells you to "tap" on things and gives you stars for battles.

>If you repeat the same battle twice, and make the same moves, the RNG outcome as well as the movement of the enemy will be the same.

>Units will stop attacking each other for no fucking reason at all

>The arrow of the crossbowman comes out of his head

>3 voice lines for around 10 spells

>The character model of our buff battlemage is the same as for the """beautiful""" elf they are only different texture-wise

>The dialogue is written like a bad LARP

>The twist is that it was all a dream of a comatose girl

>A plot important character follows you, she can get stuck behind a tree stump and you can leave her there

>There are mistranslated and non-translated sentences in different languages than English

>Pic related is how a troll looks like

>The game claims you can chose between three different factions, you actually have to play them in order.

>The leveling up system is a straight upgrade system, with three straight branches

>You have to akwardly draw the spells on the screen instead of just casting them, they call it an innovative casting system.

>Everything is overall fucking ugly.

>Some of the units avalible to you are actually completely useless and a waste of gold.

>Almost every spell just deals damage with nothing more.

>The game resets all your gold and units when you get to a new location.

And most importantly

The devs are so incompetent that they misspelled their game's title. It's called "Spellcarafter" on the side of the box instead of "Spellcrafter"


c89812  No.15819821

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

not the worst but i remember my dad shouting to turn it fucking down, same great bass loop over and over


73e6ba  No.15819843

>>15819821

Oh god anon, that bass line is killing me. I'm gonna annoy the shit out of my friends with this, thanks


871eb9  No.15819868

>>15819821

This looks like comfy piece of trash though.


c89812  No.15819894

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>15819868

maybe, i played it a shit ton but i imagine it'd be complete shite at this point

this was another one i played, gave me fucking nightmares (along with re2)

i know it was a technical limitation but i wish more horror games wouldn't let you see too far ahead, adds so much


c923e0  No.15819897

>>15819776

mobile ports are just cheating


c89812  No.15819997

quads


85dcea  No.15820038

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

Probably this.


871eb9  No.15820042

>>15819997

You tried.


c89812  No.15820061

File: e30a4a1bf904272⋯.png (96.62 KB, 1200x760, 30:19, e30a4a1bf9042728c22b07dd66….png)

>>15820042

my eyesight's bad so i got them, i think


9393e9  No.15820164

>>15816426

>because there's nothing to measure it by

the guy in the video hitting the stick maybe hurr…


a345ad  No.15820224

>>15819894

>>15819868

net yaroze was the fucking shit


cc22c6  No.15820369

File: 924277ba427751a⋯.png (38.81 KB, 326x395, 326:395, 3_years.png)


0e95be  No.15820413

File: db5cff053da4410⋯.jpg (326.39 KB, 1600x800, 2:1, You can climb every mounta….jpg)

I can't say I played a lot of bad games.

Even those I'd consider terrible within a franchise are still serviceable in some way on their own, so I'm just going to post this.

I played Skyrim for about 2 hours back on release and dropped it immediately afterwards, with no intention of going back to it ever again.

What put me off so much before I even got a chance to experience the game properly was the interface. I hated it so much, it just made not want to play the game any more.

>>15816382

I honestly liked it.

It's not a fantastic game, but still a very good one.

I really wish it didn't have that dull section in eastern Europe, but other than that it was pretty solid.


2b4f0f  No.15820414

>>15820061

well i guess everyone elses eyesight is bad so they forgot to check em


871eb9  No.15820464

File: 21b1c9807e726e9⋯.jpg (76.85 KB, 1024x712, 128:89, Man-squinting-suitability-….jpg)

>>15820414

>>15819997 Checked I think? I can't really see.


6370cb  No.15820511

Postal 3 for me. There's nothing worse than a terrible AND boring game.


d00dc5  No.15820795

Ar no surge


716ffa  No.15821157

File: 516e1c6b117766d⋯.gif (7.29 KB, 320x200, 8:5, Blinky 3.gif)

Honestly? If you can actually remember the worst game you've ever played, it's probably not in fact the worst game you've ever played. The worst thing I've played is most likely some indie shareware/freeware on the old Mac or Windows AOL scene that I didn't spend more than 10 minutes on because it was really bad. That or some embarrassingly bad mod for a game. Pic not related but an example of those sorts of games. Pic not related because, although it was pretty bad in a lot of ways, it's surely not the worst thing I can't remember at all.


716ffa  No.15821198

>>15821157

Or some shitty flash game of course. Ganguro Girl?


55be11  No.15821208

File: 6ee5a3e1a105385⋯.gif (649.97 KB, 400x229, 400:229, Oh_hi_Mark.gif)


340d91  No.15821993

>>15820511

I keep forgetting there even was a Postal 3.


e15964  No.15822290

File: 3bab6e9229681b3⋯.jpg (53.94 KB, 475x347, 475:347, buckaroos.jpg)

>>15815434

This piece of shit game right here.

>awful animation

>game plays like shit

>it's a barely functional platformer with the laziest assets i've fucking seen

>every enemy only has 2 frames of animation

>music is a 10 second midi loop of "happy happy joy joy"

This piece of shit is the pinnacle of "design by boardroom".


df335e  No.15822359

File: 949b8de11a06e26⋯.png (160.27 KB, 220x312, 55:78, ClipboardImage.png)


ddf380  No.15822376

File: 2681d5b0ee6799f⋯.png (87.32 KB, 220x378, 110:189, 220px-The_3rd_Birthday_Cov….png)

I will never, ever forgive the people responsible for this


315132  No.15822384

File: 17dae1fb12d8757⋯.jpg (35.33 KB, 220x305, 44:61, serveimage.jpg)

>>15822290

Genesis does what nintendon't once again.


5310fe  No.15822393

>>15815434

This pack of random physics games I downloaded from one of the share threads.


4fae6f  No.15822401

File: 8964b2171d98e15⋯.png (135.91 KB, 460x215, 92:43, ClipboardImage.png)

I've played tons of shit from rompacks over the years, games I've played for two minutes that I immediately forgot, so that's not really worth mentioning.

>inb4 it's not really a game

I know, but it's the one that really stood out as pissing me off. The whole point of it boiled down to "depressed people are literally unable to fix their fucking lives or have any fun at any point at all, they must be miserable all fucking day every day at everything they do", and the game arbitrarily locked off choices because it felt like it. It's the most patronizing piece of shit I've ever "experienced".


7110aa  No.15822403

File: 05894aca525af0e⋯.jpg (20.64 KB, 1280x720, 16:9, raiders of the lost ark 26….jpg)

Raiders of the Lost Ark on Atari 2600 is up there. Even if you have the manual and know what to do it's still not a fun game.


9dc807  No.15822410

File: c37e56513e10937⋯.jpg (265.46 KB, 1353x1342, 123:122, 81gM4-2WseL._SL1353_.jpg)

Honestly it's no wonder why Cage decided to just make interactive movies after this game came out.


6c363f  No.15822459

File: 5f948873de4e302⋯.jpg (205.53 KB, 901x1374, 901:1374, dogshit-incarnate.jpg)


18800a  No.15822614

File: 7cbbea0e06806d7⋯.jpg (91.62 KB, 960x485, 192:97, Murdered-Soul-Suspect-Andr….jpg)

This shitheap right here. I didn't even pay anything for it and I felt like I got ripped off. The only reason I finished the game was basically because I had nothing better to do. The gameplay was boring, the puzzles were piss easy, and it was just a janky uninspiring mess overall.


583663  No.15822737

File: 50135172365c35f⋯.jpg (104.37 KB, 950x950, 1:1, smug_wesker_having_some_co….jpg)

>>15821157

This is actually pretty true, I've played endless amounts of Game Maker and Flash games in the past that are hardly playable, but when talking about the worst games ever, do those kinds of games really count? Anyone can whip up the worst game ever made in five minutes with all the tools available nowadays, is it fair to compare those games in with professionally released trashfires like Sonic '06 or Ride to Hell: Retribution?


716ffa  No.15822760

>>15822737

Then perhaps a more meaningful category is shittiest commercial game that you've played.


b05e09  No.15822762

>>15822410

Hey Woolie.


a210f9  No.15822767

>>15822459

Second.


4a38bc  No.15822793

>>15820369

Do RPGMaker games count?


7ae8cc  No.15822996

>>15822401

But this was just the intro stage for the best game ever made, Global culture war 2 electric bugaloo.


7ae8cc  No.15822998

>>15822762

I wouldn't be surprised if he was the only one of those fags that did browse here.


a7a486  No.15823015

File: e4436619574bde0⋯.jpg (82.47 KB, 600x603, 200:201, crash clone.jpg)

this


536960  No.15823020

File: 3eedc34d195d225⋯.jpg (32.51 KB, 500x500, 1:1, 8767869890.jpg)

>>15816691

I enjoyed DA2 and there's absolutely nothing I can say in my defense. I don't even know why I'm admitting this.


171427  No.15823037

File: 36682f90a1875f2⋯.jpg (152.92 KB, 600x557, 600:557, 81117427-item-big-PS1-VIRI….jpg)

File: 5dcf237bbd4318a⋯.png (209.25 KB, 582x482, 291:241, virus-t-con-pcsxreload-o-p….png)

File: a58aaafe1a054c3⋯.jpg (36.58 KB, 1280x720, 16:9, maxresdefault-2.jpg)

Virus. The movie was bad, but holy shit the game was AVGN tier of bad


3365e2  No.15823567

>>15816738

Hit and Run was the sequel to Road Rage, anon.


d2752e  No.15823937

File: 260e27349b02c00⋯.jpg (72.21 KB, 410x500, 41:50, ExtremePaintbrawl_1_PCbox.jpg)

I bought this at Best Buy on a whim because I used to like paintball

It is the worst game I'd ever played. From what I remember half the features don't work (some of the guns just won't select), some maps don't work. AI just wanders around with no direction and regularly gets stuck behind things on the map. Shots commonly don't register. Sometimes when you shot, a paint splatter would just hover in mid air. Quite literally every thing about the game is broken.

PC Gamer (which used to be somewhat reliable back in 1998) gave it the lowest score I've ever seen them give, something like 2%.

ET for Atari was also really fucking awful.


d2752e  No.15823938

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

97ca0e  No.15834861

>>15823937

Paintball games are normally a weird sort of comfy.


98f494  No.15835908

>>15823937

Simulating(video game about paint ball) a simulation(paint ball simulates gun fights). This never ends well.


edc93c  No.15835911

>>15816104

I remember enjoying that game.


344074  No.15835958

File: 040fc3e62147dfd⋯.png (1.27 MB, 750x827, 750:827, image.png)

>>15815685

Someone's been playing the long game with happymeal toys


5ad6e8  No.15835974

>>15822767

>>15822459

I've been playing this game recently. What's so bad about it? Is it the fact that the majority of exp that you earn in the first 40 hours will be from discovering locations on your map? Is it because the "free" accounts are so limited in their ability to do anything that "free" players are effectively forced to purchase the expansions if they wish to participate in the game's economy, or even make use of minor conveniences like mounts that will allow them to move faster than the default walking speed? Is it because combat seems to lack any complexity beyond the diablo-esque "get better gear" and that skills and passives seem to boil down to "stack crit chance and dps on a variety of skills that themselves are nothing more than different flavors of damage"? Is it any of these, or am I totally fucking wrong?


69e981  No.15836047

>>15816537

Art for the ad looks bad ass. Reminds me of one of those fantasy novels.


5f122e  No.15836059

>>15835974

I play wvw 4 days/week, and that part of the community is pretty great. you do need to have 1 expansion or the other depending on which class you want to play for that, but many guilds will pool together to gift poorfag members expansions so they can play important builds.




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