>but the romance shit is weeby and retarded.
Come on, OP…
Don't be a faggot, grow up and play what you like without giving a shit, your mom isn't going to enter your room, your normalfag friends won't judge you. The VNs are a good, fun read, the porn doesn't detract from it, and you can play the SFW versions if you want.
Your life is going to improve a lot if you drop some preconceived notions you have about some games and just fucking play them.