/pone/ - My Little Pony★

>>307025 (OP)

08:00

>you're ruining the fluffy blankets with your sweat and tears

>so you get up and wait by the phone

>almost the instant it rings, you're shouting into it

<"What's going on?"

>"Ruby, mein freund. It's Aryanne. Listen. Your life-"

<"Is in grave danger, your scientists, blah blah blah, I'm going to die today, yes?"

>"Um, yes. Vhat is happen?"

>you explain to Aryanne what's happened since you woke up the first time

>"I see, I see. Very interesting. So you get many chances."

<"Do you know what's going on? Can you help me?"

>"I think I can. Listen well:"

>Aryanne explains the rules of the game to you as best she can:

1. Every story update represents one hour

2. At every hour, there will be at least one choice which will result in your death.

2. If you can make it to midnight, you win.

3. If you die, in-story you'll wake up at 8 in the morning again, but unless you specify that you want to do something differently, the day will be skimmed over til you respawn at the last hour you completed.

4. You have until OP goes to bed on Sunday to make it to midnight.

5. Don't stay in any one place too long.

>you thank Aryanne for the information, exchange parting words, and hang up

>don't stay in any one place too long?

>well that should be easy, all you have to do is carry on like a normal tourist then

>you mull over your options as you brush your mane

>maybe you should get some breakfast?

>or try to meet famous ponies?

>a loud clattering noise outside lets you know that there is now a pile of dirt and shattered terra cotta on the balcony

What do?

>>307026

Try to meet famous ponies. We would be moving about a lot if we did that.

>>307026

>>307028

09:00

>you don't exactly have an appetite right now

>well, how about meeting some famous ponies then?

>that was part of your original purpose in this town, wasn't it?

>the most obvious place to look for famous ponies in Ponyville would be the big ugly crystal castle

>well there's your first destination then

>as soon as you look presentable, you head out into the longest day of your life

>you spot the castle immediately

>seriously, it's about three times as big as any other building in this town and the only crystal structure in a village of wooden walls and thatched rooftops

>the path there is lined with ominous dangers such as happily singing birds and townsfolk cheerily saying hello

>hey, it's not paranoia if they really are out to get you

>fortunately, the walk there is uneventful

>as you get closer, you make out an usual yet familiar sight

>it's Anonymous

>it'd be hard to miss him, since he's a big, tall… something

>you don't really remember what he is, but he's the only one

>you met him a while back in Trottingham, he said he was doing some soul-searching by taking a grand Equestrian tour

>he did mention something about how he'd lived with Princess Twilight at one point

>was he back now?

>when he'd left Trottingham, the two of you had been on very good terms

>oh, could he help you meet the Princess?

>moreover, he's the closest thing you have to a friend in this town, and it could be very helpful to recruit him as an extra pair of eyes

>you stick your hoof in the air, ready to wave

>and then you bring it back down

>hold on a moment

>Anonymous is a bit of a rough-houser, and something of a klutz besides

>today might not be a good day to greet the big beast

>maybe you should sneak past him to see if you can't meet Princess Twilight at Friendship Court?

>if you told her about your problem, she might be able to help

>or maybe it would just be safest to try some other famous pony and try the Princess later

What do?

>>307039

Spare a visit to the most fashionable pony around town instead

Maybe go on a spa trip with her while you're at it

>>307048

Go there and walk in the shadows were the huge dumbass hairless monkey can't see her.

>>307048

Maybe we can use magic to change the color of our hair to look like Rarity until we get to the boutique. Anonymous might ignore us if we use a disguise.

Okay horsefuckers, it's past midnight in my timezone. I'm going to bed for tonight. Next update as soon as I wake up.

>>307052

Compliment her good looks and stylish mane. which compliments yourself by proxy since you also share her fabulous mane

>>307057

I can see sweetie bell starting a rube goldberg death sequence but I don't see how the cat could kill us.

>>307058

Probably just by ripping Ruby to pieces. She should really avoid stepping on Opal's mouse toy.

>>307052

>>307054

11:00

<"I really, really like your mane."

>Rarity reaches out and grabs a lock of your hair

>she pulls in toward her face and inhales deeply

>it's fully red again, indicating that your disguise spell has worn off prematurely

<"U-um…"

>Rarity releases your mane and stares into your eyes

>"I like your mane too."

<"Oh, um, thank you."

>"What do you use in it, darling? It's so soft!"

<"Um…"

>what do you use in it?

>it's just some generic stuff

<"Oh, you know, just some shampoo from the supermarket."

>"What?!"

>with that, Rarity clambers past your neck and down your back, and throws her hooves around your flank

>you'd run away right now, but your legs don't seem to function

>also she's kind of heavy

>"Why, but that's impossible. darling! Look at your cutie mark, surely you work in the industry!"

<"The industry?"

>"The fashion industry, you silly girl!"

<"Oh, well, I do run a little jewelry shop in Trottingham."

>"I knew it!"

>at long last, Rarity slides off of you

>she takes your face in her hooves, her own hovering mere inches from yours

>"A fellow fashion entrepreneur using supermarket shampoo? Unthinkable! Unacceptable! You'll ruin your lovely mane! I cannot allow this to go on any longer!"

>she releases her grip on your face and engages in a moment of deep thought

>"I know just what to do! As of this moment, you are my apprentice! Your first lesson shall be a trip to the spa! While we are there, we shall pick out a proper hair care product for you and discuss our experiences in the world of fashion!"

>Rarity's magic engulfs your plot and pushes you toward the door

>"Sweetie Belle! Do mind the shop for me while I'm gone! I'm taking my dear friend…"

<"R-Ruby"

>"I'm taking my dear friend Ruby to the spa!"

>"Let us go, post haste, post haste!"

>in this moment, your belly releases a tremendous growl

>this is enough to shake Rarity from her frenzy

>indeed, she seems almost like an ordinary, not manic pony when she asks

>"Oh, unless you'd like to stop someplace for lunch first. I know all the finest eateries in town!"

>hm, you did skip breakfast, didn't you?

What do?

>>307066

I feel like going the whole day without food will probably fuck us in the end. Agree to stop somewhere for lunch, but insist on somewhere with quick service so you can get in and out.

>>307067

This.

>>307066

Wow I'm getting some rapey vibes from Rarity. I was hoping to fuck with her a little but it seems like Ruby is the one being taken for a ride. It doesn't look like she's going to take no for an answer so do >>307067 but also take care to eat carefully so we don't choke on it and die. It looks like we get killed from mere happenstance as apposed to someone out to get us so who knows what could kill us.

>>307066

>>307067

>>307068

>>307069

12:00

<"Mmm, maybe just a quick bite."

>"Ooh, eager to start your education, are we?"

<"Sure."

>"There is one place that's both stylish and quick. It's a delightful little seafood cafe called Caviar. Bon oui?"

<"Mm, yes, sounds good."

>"Come, come along then. The day is young!"

>actually, it's about half over

>praise the Sun

>on the way to the cafe, you and Rarity make some small talk that you've already forgotten by the time you sit down

>as promised, a waiter is with you in no time at all

>a tall, swarthy stallion, his eyepatch and gold tooth clashing with his neat suit-vest

>"Welcome to Caviarghh. I be your waiter, Swarthy Swordfish. How be ye fine ladies on this fine day?"

>Rarity makes some inarticulate giggling noise

<"Delighted, sweetie."

>the waiter's eye fixes onto you

>"I say, lass, is that a Trottingham accent?"

>you give him a fluttering blink, hoping maybe he'll give you a discount if you work your charms right

<"Why, yes it is."

>"Aye? I be from the old city meself. You look right familiar ta me. Did we ever meet up there?"

<"I'm sorry to say I don't recall, sweetie."

>his eye twitches at the "sweetie"

>"Hmm… But mayhaps ye have a kinspony I ken? A sister perhaps?"

<"Ah, I do have a sister. She's not usually in the country though. She's something of a… sailor."

>"sailor" is a technically correct way of putting it

>but "terrorist" might be technically correct too

>hey, as long as it's in international waters, you don't have to say anything

>"I see, I see. Well, in that case, what would you ladies like to eat today?"

>Rarity pipes up

>"Ooh! I'd like the kelp sandwich, please."

>the waiter smiles a big wide smile at you

>"And fer you, miss?"

>the menu isn't particularly large

>it seems there aren't a whole lot of options for herbivores when it comes to seafood

>you're somewhat torn between the seaweed veggie roll, the plankton bread, and the algae soup

>>307070

Seaweed veggie roll sounds the least sketchy. The plankton bread is probably small enough to be eaten by plankton, and the algae soup is probably swamp water.

>>307070

I vote for the veggie roll.

>>307070

>>307071

>>307072

>his eye twitches at the "sweetie"

>"Hmm… But mayhaps ye have a kinspony I ken? A sister perhaps?"

What are the odds Red fucked this guy over and he poisons the food and kills us?

>>307073

Very high. It was probably good not to mention her by name.

>>307075

Right but the op made that decision, not us, so it could still be a good chance we get poisoned in some way.

>>307071

I suspect that the algae is poisonous, since several types of algae are poisonous. The seaweed wrap is probably safe. Just clarify that the seaweed is not from the Neighpon area where there was a magical reactor spill.

>>307070

Order the same thing as Rarity

That way there's little chance of being poisoned

>>307084

Tell her we have an allergy to seafood

Suggest a place that actually serves breakfast food to her instead

>>307084

We are still hungry and we are not coming back to the seafood restaurant, Ruby's mane and coat color give points out she might be related to Red, it sucks to be the sister of a well know pirate.

>>307086

This as well.

>>307084

>my prediction was half true.

weeeeeew I knew the chef would fuck with ruby somehow but didn't expect rarity to be the one that actually does the deed.

>>307086

>>307087

This is a groundhog day style story so we know what to expect if we go back there. We could avoid it and end up getting killed in another unknowable way or go back to where we know how we'll die and overcome it.

Yeah but as >>307087 mentioned,

Her mane and coat are a dead giveaway

It might be easier to deal with things around ponies who don't know Red

>>307089

Fair enough, then I guess we could go get some sandwiches and tea then?

>>307084

>>307086

>>307087

>>307088

>>307089

>>307091

13:00

<"I'm ah… allergic to seafood."

>"Oh. Well, I'm not quite sure where to go then."

<"Is there someplace we can just pick up some tea and sandwiches perhaps?"

>Rarity holds her hoof to her chin

>"Ah-ha! I know just what to do! My good friend Fluttershy usually has some tea and sandwiches ready. We can go and visit her, and, ah! We can invite her to the spa with us! Doesn't that sound lovely? Fluttershy is a real dear, I just know you'll love her!"

>Fluttershy is another famous pony, right?

<"That sounds perfect."

>"It's a bit of a walk, I hope you don't mind."

<"Not at all. It's gorgeous out."

>actually, it was gorgeous out this morning

>now it's kind of hot

>at least, that's the way it seems to a mare from the city of grey skies and rain

>Rarity keeps remarking that this is why you must pick out higher quality hair care products

>you're not entirely sure what "this" is, but a damp lock of red hair in your eyes gives you a general idea

>finally, you make it to a tiny little cottage outside of town

>Rarity knocks on the door and cheerily greets a yellow pegasus

>"Fluttershy darling, this is Ruby. I'm showing her the ropes of the fashion industry. I was wondering if we might stop by for some tea and sandwiches, and if perhaps you would like to join us at the spa afterwards."

>Fluttershy beams a heartwarming grin

>"Not at all! I was actually just making some."

>Fluttershy turns her benevolent gaze upon you

>"How do you do, Ruby?"

Say hello to Fluttershy, /pone/.

>>307096

Say hello and compliment her stylish mane and good looks.

>>307096

"Hello Fluttershy, is a pleasure to meet you."

inb4 Ruby gets mauled by a bear.

>>307099

We should avoid the animals then

>>307099

I think less bear and more angel that gets pissed off due to reasons and we die because another prank goes out of control. Also depending on what time period this takes place Discord might get us killed as well. why did we agree to come here? This place is a murder house

>>307096

>>307098

>>307099

14:00

>play it safe?

>play it safe

<"Hello, Fluttershy. It's a pleasure to meet you."

>somehow this simple greeting erases Fluttershy's composure

>"Oh, um, likewise."

>she nervously extends a trembling hoof, presumably for a hoofshake

>you take it

>and, how can you resist?

>you kiss it

<"Your mane and good looks are simply stunning, sweetie."

>"Eep!"

>Fluttershy yanks her hoof back and hides behind her stylish mane

>Rarity squeals and giggles and swats at your mane

>"Ruby, you devil, don't tease poor Fluttershy like that!"

>Rarity coaxes Fluttershy out of the shadows

>"It's okay, darling. She didn't mean it."

>"Oh… sh-she didn't?"

<"Well, I do think your mane looks nice."

>she perks up considerably at this

>"Oh, why thank you!"

>why does that make you uneasy?

>probably because everything is making you uneasy today

>relax

>Rarity cheers

>"Right, so, just a quick stop to eat, and then we can all head to the spa!"

>one sandwich break later, and you're walking to the spa with two bona fide famous ponies like you've been friends for years

>the conversation is fun, but it might be improved somewhat if Fluttershy understood the concept of "personal space"

>but sure enough, you eventually get there

>no sooner than you're let in by a couple of spa attendants does Rarity force your gaze upon a wall full of unintelligible plastic bottles

>"Now, it's very important that you pick out something that works for you before you begin."

>you stare at the wall

<"Uhh…"

>"Hm, let me narrow down your options a bit."

>Rarity zips around the wall like some kind of spider and returns with a three bottles

>the first one is described as a red color preserver

>didn't you already explain to her that you were a natural red?

>oh wait, you died after that

>the second is described as a pheremone blend designed to enhance feminine charm

>Fluttershy points at it

>"I think you should use that one."

>the third one was made with some sort of magical ingredients

>"Guaranteed to make your mane shine like the Sun itself!(tm)"

>not a very catchy slogan

>hm…

>which one seems right here?

>>307103

I choose the color preserver, i am not sure about the other two.

>>307103

Lets go with the pheromone blend, sounds fun possibly

Or just ask Fluttershy which one she normally uses, since her mane is so pretty and all

>>307108

Pheromone blend will almost certainly kill us, but it will probably be hilarious. I vote for it.

>>307110

>Pheromone blend will almost certainly kill us,

After what happened to Ruby with the seaweed wrap I'm not sure that the most apparently suicidal option is not the safest. Let's do it.

>>307103

Did we just accidentally become in lesbians with Fluttershy?

>>307110

>>307122

This. There is absolutely nothing that could go wrong with the pheromone blend. Besides enhancing good looks and charm is the whole point of a spa.

>>307125

>Did we just accidentally become in lesbians with Fluttershy?

Either that or Fluttershy wants to kidnap Ruby and use her for an animal breeding season relief scheme. We should be careful, or Ruby may wind up as Angel Bunny's bitch.

>>307103

>"Guaranteed to make your mane shine like the Sun itself!(tm)"

And Celestia accidentally lowers Ruby into the depths of Equestria. I see where that one is going.

>>307103

>>307106

>>307108

>>307110

>>307122

>>307125

>>307126

>>307128

15:00

>you look around

>no big bipedal monsters

>no earth pony little sisters

>no white-haired assistants

>nobody here but strangers

>okay

>so your hoof touches the…

>…pheremone blend

>Fluttershy gasps

>Rarity hums

>"Hmm, trying to be discreet, are we? I see. Aloe?"

>an attendant with a rag on her head zips over

>Rarity forks the bottle over to her with conspiratory motions

>"Get my friend Ruby ready for treatment with some of… this. Discretion. Is. Advised."

>Aloe nods and takes you by the hoof into a room with a padded table

>"Please lie here, miss Ruby."

>is Aryanne in the room?

>you climb up onto the table and make yourself comfortable on your belly

<"Say, are you from Germaneia?"

>a squirt of liquid splatters your mane

>"No. I was born in Geneighva."

>hooves begin massaging your scalp

<"Urgh. Ah."

>"Is that… tension. In your scalp?"

<"Uhh…"

>Aloe chuckles

>"I usually don't feel anything like zis above the neck. It seems you're under a great deal of stress."

<"Well… today has been a bit… eventful."

>"Oh my, what happened?"

>well gee

>you did die about four times

<"Oh, I can't really talk about- ah!"

>the hooves are on your neck now

>immediately, pleasure and pain stab your consciousness as the skilled masseuse turns your knotted flesh into jelly

<"Eghhhheghhhhhh…"

>"Zis may take a bit a longer than I anticipated. Do you mind if you're a bit late joining your friends in the bath?"

<"Noooot… aaaat… aaallll…"

>for the next hour

>pleasure becomes pain

>pain becomes pleasure

>reality becomes illusion

>oblivion becomes the universe

>you're pretty sure there's drool on your chin

>after about a thousand years, Aloe taps you on the cheek

>"All done, Miss Ruby. Your friends are waiting for you."

>you float on a cloud out of the room and into another room with a large bath full of steaming water

>Rarity claps her hooves

>"There you are! You look so much better! A few more visits and you might even have those split ends healed!"

>split ends?

>this bitch

>you can't help but notice that her mane is a bit excessively shiny

>and is Fluttershy's mane… just a touch redder?

>"Oh, come in, come in! An hour in here and you'll positively glow! It's important to look your best in the industry, you know. Nobody takes fashion advice from somebody who doesn't look like she takes care of herself."

>she means well

>she means well

>she means well

>gingerly, you lower yourself into the water

>your muscles relax even further and you almost collapse

>oh, drowning in three feet of water would be embarrassing

>even worse, you'd have to live with it afterwards

>you balance yourself out

>Rarity claps again

>"Oh! Do you know what would be simply perfect? Juice! With little umbrellas! Don't go anywhere, I'll be right back!"

>with that, Rarity is gone

>you're alone in the bath with Fluttershy

>she's staring at you with her big, watery eyes

>oh geez

>maybe you should say something to make this a little less awkward

>>307130

"Do you like animals?"

>>307133

>>307134

That should distract her for a while. Maybe Ruby should find out more about her interests to make sure that she is not into autoerotic asphyxiation or something else that is likely to get Ruby killed.

>>307130

"Whats been on your mind lately?"

>>307130

>>307133

>>307134

>>307138

16:00

>hmmm

>you did see a lot of birdhouses at Fluttershy's cottage

>and a chicken coop

>and a pig pen

>and plenty of great big piles of dung

>it's a pretty safe bet…

<"So, do you like animals?"

>Fluttershy squeaks, and pauses

>and then smiles

>"Why, yes. Is there something you wanted to ask?"

<"Umm…"

>well, as long as she's answering questions about animals

>maybe you can get some advice for Red's birthday present

<"Um, how hardy are parrots, exactly?"

>in a little bit she has you convinced that the scarlet macaw is the bird to buy for a combination of intelligence, color, and intimidation

>the "intimidation" question was met with a puzzled look

>in short time, Rarity returns levitating three glasses of juice, sure enough, with little umbrellas

>she's also got a newspaper

>after settling in the bath and passing out the drinks, Rarity unfolds the newspaper and reads

>"If one 'Ruby Ring' will come to the post office, she may find information of advantage to her."

>Rarity shows you where that is in the classifieds

>"That wouldn't happen to be you, would it?"

<"Probably."

>"Would you like to go and find out about that? I can show where the post office is, if you'd like."

>well

>you've been at the spa for a couple hours now

>it might be about time to leave

>and a little advantageous information would be nice, especially today

>but what if it's a trap?

>well, it's probably not a trap, but you never know what might get you killed when there's a death curse

>and the water is still so nice…

>>307143

Let's get going before we drown in three feet of water

The post office probably has important information from Aryanne regarding our situation

We should be careful not to slip on our way out of the bath and spa though

And we should be on the lookout for anything dangerous on our way to the post office for sure

And for good measure, let Rarity and Fluttershy go in the post office before us just in case the post office is a trap

I agree to go to the post office, there no need to worry for going to a public build. Just watch the sky when we are near the office in case some pegasus drops their heavy packages at us for accident.

>>307146

>her Pinkie senses comes up

>Ruby gets struck by a bolt of lightning, squished by a piano or stung to death by a colony of wasp.

Yeah there's no need to see Pinkie, that's a silly idea,

>>307143

>>307145

>>307146

>>307147

17:00

>oh it better be from Aryanne

>oh it better be a cure for all this

<"I think I should probably check that out."

>"Mm, good idea. I can take you there. Fluttershy, are you coming?"

>Fluttershy looks at you

>then back at the water

>"I-I'm not quite ready to leave yet…"

>you and Rarity say goodbye to Fluttershy and towel off

>you're just about to walk out of the bath when a blue pegausus with a rainbow mane walks in cheerfully

>she takes one look at Rarity and wheels around

>but the door glows blue and slams in her face

>oh, oh, she's a famous pony too!

>one of the Princess's friends, right?

>or is she on that sports team?

>Ren… something?

>Rarity approaches her like some sort of predatory animal

>"Rainbow Dash! Going so soon?"

>right, Rainbow Dash

>Rainbow Dash fidgets and squirms and smiles and frowns

>"I-I wasn't here for the bath or anything! I-I was just… just!"

>Rarity smirks

>"I was just here to let you know about the fireworks tonight!"

>Rarity's barrage of smug lets up

>"Fireworks? What ever for?"

>"I dunno, Pinkie Pie just found some today and wants to blow them up. Everyone's gonna be there. So, if you'll ex-cuuuse me-"

>the door remains barred by Rarity's magic

>"Well Rainbow, even though you definitely did not come here for the bath, as long as you're here, could you do me one teensy weensy little favor?"

>Rainbow groans

>"You see, I have to take my friend here to the post office, and we're leaving poor poor Fluttershy over there all alone. Would you be a dear and keep her company for me?"

>Rainbow Dash's nose scrunches up

>"F-fine…"

>Rarity plants air-kisses on Rainbow Dash's currently-pink cheeks

>"Thank you so much, darling. Toodles~!"

>you follow Rarity out of the spa as she hysterically laughs her way across the lobby

>once you get outside, she wipes the tears from her eyes

>"Oh, ah, ehehehehe, hum. Right, it should be, ah, this way."

>Rarity resumes her giggles as she explains the feminine shortcomings of Rainbow Dash

>you can sort of understand why it's funny

<"Oh, my sister would be just the same way. She won't go near any water that isn't salty. I'll have to try that on her next time she comes home."

>fond memories of using your magic for the purpose of sisterly bullying resurface at the thought

>"Oh, right, right, you mentioned she was something of a sailor."

>what?

>didn't you die after that?

<"When did I mention that?"

>"Hm? Oh, um, I'm not sure. Anyway, here we are."

<"Ah, so we are."

>a momentary burst of paranoia causes you to hold the door open and allow Rarity to enter before you

>you head in after her and call out

<"Did someone put out an advertisement for Ruby Ring?"

>a post office worker looks up from a magazine to glare at you

>she makes some sort of grunting sound and disappears

>she returns clutching a package by a strand of twine with her teeth

<"Thank you."

>you take the package and examine it

>the return address bears the name "Red Beard"

>damnit, you keep telling her that "Beard" isn't a clever nickname like "Ring" is

>ponies are just going to think she's a stallion

<"Oh, it's from my sister."

>"Ooh, what's inside?"

<"Let's find out."

>the salt-worn, sun-faded cardboard yields easily to your magic

>inside, covering everything else up, is a note

>"Sup, sis? Aryanne told me to get rid of this for a little while, so I figured I'd send it to you for appraisal. Is this thing worth anything? I'll come by to pick it up next time I come home. In the meanwhile you can use it as a display piece or something, just don't sell it. Love ya, XOXO."

>damnit

>this was to Red's advantage, not yours

>under the note is a little barnacle-encrusted chest

Dare you open it?

>>307149

Lets bring it to Pinkie pie so she can open it

She loves surprises!

>>307149

>>307150

18:00

>you open it

>inside is something bizarre

>actually, it appears to be an ordinary gold choker with an ordinary ruby embedded in it

>but years of jeweling tell you that something is off about it

>but what?

>"Oh, how sweet! Does she often send you jewelry from her travels?"

<"Uh, yes, actually."

>you're not really focusing on what Rarity is saying

>you pick up the choker with your magic

>and it attacks your throat!

>you prepare to wake up in the hotel bed again

>oh you made it so long this time too

>now you'll have to redo all of it

>whyyyyyyyy

>oh, wait

>you hear fireworks starting to go off

>you're still in the post office

>all it did was put itself on

<"Oh, that's interesting."

>you go to take it off

<"Oh, that's very interesting."

>"What is?"

<"It won't come off."

>"Oh, here, let me try."

>Rarity zaps at the back of the choker

>to no avail

<"Hmm… I think it's magical."

>"Well, we could always take it to Twilight Sparkle. She's good with magical problems like this. If Rainbow Dash was right, she should be at the fireworks right now."

>the post office worker barks at you

>"Well wherever you twose goes, just clear outta here in the next five minutes! We're closin'!"

>oh dear

>what do you fear more?

>explosives?

>or evil magical jewelry?

>>307152

Well fuck it, let's go with Twilight.

>>307152

Yeah let's go find Twilight

We get a free firework show while we're at it

>>307152

>>307153

>>307154

19:00

>mmmmmmmmm

>what's more painful?

>getting blown up?

>or getting decapitated?

>or what if Anonymous is at the fireworks?

>"You know, it doesn't look all that bad on you. Kind of naughty…"

>you let out a little shriek

>"I think I'd like to ask Princess Twilight for help!"

>outside the post office, you head toward the fireworks blowing up over the big ugly crystal castle

>it looks even more out-of-place at night

>Rarity catches up to you

>"Wait, Ruby, listen, all I'm saying is that this might not be such a bad thing. Between that choker and the pheremone shampoo-"

>you shriek again

<"I'm going to get raped!"

>"Well, that's not quite what I was thinking. Unless that's what you're into."

>you shriek and break into a gallop

>reaching the courtyard, you plow into the first purple pony you see

>wait a second, who the hell is this slut?

>her purple is too pinkish, and she's an ordinary unicorn

<"Where is Twilight Sparkle?!"

>"T-Twilight is…"

>someone taps you on the shoulder

>"I'm right here. What do you need?"

>you take a split second to note how bizarre she looks with those oversized wings and that elongated neck

>and then you cling to her foreleg and weep

<"Please help me I don't want to get raped!"

>Rarity gallops in after you, out of breath

>"Ruby! There you are!"

>"Rarity! What did you do to this mare? Why is she crying about rape?!"

>"What? Nothing! I did nothing!"

>"Why does her mane look like yours then?"

>"I-it's pure coincidence! She's upset because that choker attached itself to her and won't come off."

>"Choker?"

>Twilight's hoof props up your chin for a better view of your neck

>"That's a curse detector."

>you recoil; you've been found out!

<"C-curse?"

>"Curse. If you know anything, you should tell me so I can help you. Has anything else strange happened today?"

What should you tell her?

>>307155

Line 8 should be

<redtext.

>>307155

Ok, deep breath and collect your thoughts. As crazy as this sounds Ruby should tell princess Twilight what's happening the best she can.

>tfw just realized I could have named the story "Hard Rubeset"

>>307155

>>307157

20:00

>okay

>fine

>you'll tell her

>she takes you inside the hideous castle along with Rarity and the slut you tackled

>you explain the basic gist of your day thus far

>all 29 hours of it

>Rarity contributes useful details as well:

>"I could have sworn it was dyed!"

>Twilight taps her chin

>"That's an interesting curse. A powerful one too. That would have to be tied to an item. Can you think of anything you've recently handled that may have been cursed?"

>well gee

>any one of the hundreds of ill-gotten pieces of jewelry Red has given you to sell might have been cursed

>actually, if Aryanne told Red to get rid of the curse detector…

>is Red having this problem right now too?

>damnit

<"It's possible that I've handled a few cursed items recently."

>"Is there a chance that you might have any of them with you right now?"

<"No."

>she frowns deeply, but resigns

>"Well, that'll make this a bit more difficult, but I may still be able to help you."

>it's like a great weight has been removed from your shoulders

<"Really?"

>"Mhm!"

>she taps at a page in a spellbook

>"With this spell right here, there's a 75% chance that the curse will be lifted and the curse detector will just fall off!"

<"What's the other 25%?"

>"There's a 24% chance that you'll be vaporized, in which case, you know, no big deal, you can just come back here and try again."

>75+24

>now you're not a genius

>but that doesn't equal 100

<"What's that last 1%?"

>"Oh, it's, um, well, you know."

>she smiles at you

>"That the curse will be lifted, but…"

<"But what?"

>"But you'll be vaporized too."

>oh

<"In which case…"

>oh dear

>"You don't come back."

What do?

>>307158

Fuck it

Lets take the chance

>>307161

May the dice gods have mercy on this poor pony.

>>307166

Now we know Twilight can fix her up, go straight to the castle and talk with her to try the spell.

>>307158

>"I could have sworn it was dyed!"

That luscious tan, those Ruby lips, and hair color so natural only your undertaker knows for sure.

>>307166

Let's not open the package that Red sends to Ruby. Actually, let's stay at the spa with Fluttershy. I doubt that she can kill Ruby with Rarity there.

>>307185

Sorry m8. I already had that end post mostly written when your post popped up.

>>307188

The meme horses are dead, what a disappointment.

Rest well, OP.

>>307190

F for memhorsies.

On the off-chance you ever want to read this again: https://pastebin.com/Z2kjyFKR

So close but no cigar. The /pone/ curse strikes again.