I just came to this board because I just saw porn for what it really is. I mean, before now I've known it was heartless, fake etc. But I've been on a noporn streak for about 2 months, and just going back to it today for a while made me want to cry. I really saw the emptiness and mechanical nature of it. (I fapped a bit but didn't orgasm).
There are 3 types of porn
- People fucking each other in front of a camera
- Someone's point of view of them fucking someone
- Solo videos
All three are empty of love and emotion, and therefore ultimately completely unsatisfying once the novelty wears off, for different reasons. The first type, you could be watching the most natural, loving or passionate sex between good people. But it will never satisfy YOU emotionally, because you're not in the loop. You're just a frustrated observer alone in your room. It turns men into bitter cucks and women into sluts searching for whatever connection they may see on the screen. Most of this type of porn is also meaningless for the same reason as the second type.
Second type, it seems like you're in the loop. But it's still completely empty of love because the guys are totally robotic, just trying to find the 'perfect' camera angle, and the women are basically being used as masturbation sleeves. There is no passion or love between the actors. Their eyes are dead. The women aren't actually enjoying themselves, because they aren't actually turned on, except the nastiest (usually uglier and older) ones who have learned to embrace their degradation. The guys are only enjoying themselves in the most vulgar, mechanical and selfish (and therefore boring) ways. "Uhhh yeah baby ride that dik omg such a perfect ass hynnnnnuhh".
Third type, while I think the least harmful, is ultimately boring because it's just random people's bodies. The novelty of seeing (albeit very nice looking) pussies and assholes (or dicks) just wears off pretty quickly. There's no real love or emotion there either. Just motion. So you end up searching the first two types again.
That's the problem with porn. It's just motion. No emotion. That's the thing we actually seek from sexuality, from other people; FEELINGS. Feelings of lust and conquest, sure, but also feelings of validation, being wanted, being nurtured, being given pleasure, being loved. Who wants to watch a guy or girl just going through the motions? EMOTIONS are what we seek from sex.
I think this is the actual source of porn "addiction". It's not a habit you can't break, it's "what if the next video I see is the one that satisfies my soul". That's why you have multiple tabs open, why after a while you spend longer searching for and skipping through videos than you do watching them. You're looking for that one clip where a beautiful, desirable person believably opens themselves up and writhes with lust and ecstasy for YOU, who fulfils you with their desire for you, who validates you by being so open about it to you, or whose lust for another seems so hot you can imagine it's for you.
You only quit porn when you realise that clip DOES NOT EXIST. Porn addicts are just people chasing their tails looking for it. Most people will, after a few hours of porn browsing, "settle" for a clip to orgasm to. It's a definite settling - you know the clip wasn't exactly what you were searching for. The girl didn't really make you believe it, but the angle for that 30 seconds was just perfect. Or, the girl definitely made you believe she was enjoying it, but the angle was also showing the rough, heartless guy she was actually being fucked by's hairy asshole. Oh well. You feel shame at orgasming to something that you know in your heart didn't fulfil you. But, with the job done, you can forget about it for now.
Until you're back a few hours later, wondering why you're still browsing porn, but compelled to nonetheless. It's not physical lust for satisfaction that's driving you. It's the need for LOVE, and maybe the beautiful naked people would give you that, if you could only find the right video!